The Way You Lie | By : KJmom827 Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 2243 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters associated with Harry Potter. Nor do I own Love the Way You Lie. I make no profits from the writing of this story. |
A/N: Once again, so many hugs to Lori for her wonderfulness - she deserves them!
"And it's sick that all these battles are what keeps me satisfied."*
She wraps her arms around me from behind and asks me to stay. I can't and I tell her no. She doesn't understand, but I don't explain; I'm not sure that I can anyway. She tells me she loves me and I cringe. It wasn't supposed to be like this.
I just needed someone to talk to, someone who knew us both and might be able to be unbiased. It turns out, she's anything but unbiased. In the beginning she seemed so understanding. She listened to me, gave me advice. Slowly that changed. Now, her advice is always the same. I should leave him.
I'm not stupid; I knew what was happening long before she admitted her feelings. I just couldn't stop seeing her. I hate that she will be a casualty of my relationship, but it can't be helped. He's so jealous of her, and it may be the wrong kind, but there's emotion in him again. Every time I come home late, he feels. Soon, it will be too much. Soon he'll break.
I don't know what happened. The first time he kissed me it was like a wildfire, all consuming. How could something between us be anything but explosive? Slowly we went from screaming matches that disturbed the neighbors and make up sessions that threatened to burn me alive to this… nothing. And that's just it, he changed, or I changed, something changed.
We hardly talk, we never yell, the sex is routine and nothing else. He isn't himself anymore, or maybe I'm not. I don't know, but something shifted and I can't handle it. I need to see him thrumming with anger. I need to see him fall apart in my arms. I crave the constant conflict, the passion.
When I first realized he thought I was cheating, I almost told him the truth. But, for the first time in months, he was alive. The tension between us was palpable; I found myself drowning in waves of his fury. It felt like it used to feel. He was burning, and that's what I need. I was sure it wouldn't take much for it to come to a head. He'd scream at me, tell me he hated me, then I'd throw him down and show him how untrue that was. It never happened.
Most nights there's just acceptance, but every now and then, I see that flame in his eyes. The one that makes me shiver and causes my insides to tense. Those are the nights I push him to respond to me. I know he smells her on me, and on those nights, I don't even change my shirt.
I walk through the door and there's some dangerous emotion dancing between us immediately. Tonight something will change, I see it on his face. I don't usually make excuses anymore, but I need this to end. So, I revert to my old 'had to work late, Ginny was helping me' routine. He's strung so tight. I lean in for a hug, hoping that will make him snap.
He jerks away, and tells me dinner is waiting in the kitchen. That's when I understand. I've hurt him too much. Maybe I haven't been doing what he thinks, but the damage is done. I consider just telling him and ending this farce. Yes, that's what I'll do, but first I need to shower.
I step under the warm spray, and it feels so good I want to stand here for the rest of the night, wash away all my sins. He's waiting though, so I finish as quickly as I can. It's odd this has been going on as long as it has, but now I just want it out in the open as soon as possible.
I step out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel and I swear I hear the click of the front door. My eyes rest on a piece of paper laying innocently on our bed and I know. My blood runs cold. I make a mad dash for the door, for the man I love.
* From the song 'Love the Way You lie' (Part 2) by Rihanna featuring Eminem. As I am certain there are other people who 'own' or profit from this song (and the list would be entirely too long to post here), I would hope that I can just state that it is in NO WAY mine and I DO NOT profit in any way from the use of the lines heading the chapters of this work of fiction.
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