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Count Your Blessings	By : LadyOfTheNight Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Lucius/Hermione Views: 39968 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 5
Disclaimer: I do not own or make any money off of this fan fiction because Harry Potter belongs to a Ms J. K. Rowling and not me! ^_^

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Count Your Blessings

Disclaimer: I own nothing that looks remotely familiar! I make no money on this fiction!

A/N: Thanks to all my reviewers! Yall rock! I do plan on skipping ahead a little bit, but I plan to cover the important bits. If I didn’t skip ahead I fear that this fiction would be long and drawn out; in order for my pairing to work my Hermione is going to need more time than I am willing to write about in sequential order. I am so glad that no one threw stones at me for my rape scene. It’s not my favorite either but considering this is an adult site, and it pertained to the story, I felt it would be better to put it in. Don’t worry that is as dark as it’s going to get though! I hope my baby name is not too silly for you… I like it so there we go! lol

<><>{Chapter Two: Becoming A Mother}<><>

Hermione awoke to an unfamiliar pressure in her breasts. She moved to sit up and found that this made the pressure worse. She winced in pain.

Mrs. Weasley hurried into the room to attend to her “daughter”. “How are you feeling dear, is it your breasts?” she asked knowingly. Hermione started to ask her how she knew but Mrs. Weasley just held a hand to silence her. “I had seven children Hermione, I know a thing or two about having a baby.” She smiled warmly and gave the young women a sideways hug.

“We could get you a pump, or if you wanted… we could get the baby and give breast feeding a try…” the older witch started hesitantly. “It is completely your choice dear. No one would judge you for your choice. I can’t imagine raising your rapist’s baby…” she trailed off realizing how insensitive she sounded.

A host of thoughts where running through Hermione’s head. ‘Why couldn’t I have realized I was pregnant? I could have just used an Abortus Vita potion and not had to worry about this.’ She could hear baby noises coming from the other side of the screen and let out a sigh. Some Greater Power had made sure this baby was born. It certainly would not have happened if she had been given an opportunity to choose; that was for sure.

‘Could I really raise this baby? And be reminded of that night every moment of the day…’ She shuddered, pulling her hospital gown down over her scar out of nervousness. ‘I could always give the baby up for adoption…’ she thought. As if on cue the baby began to cry.

“He must be hungry again. We have been putting off his next bottle because it is best for the babe to get your milk. While yes it is full of anti-bodies and vitamins, a young witch or wizard gets a lot of his magical ability from his mother’s milk.” She explained.

Hermione closed her eyes and counted to three. ‘Just do it already, it must be fate.’ She thought. “Go get him Mrs. Weasley, quick before I change my mind.” Her Gryffindor courage could only last her so long.

Mrs. Weasley got up so quickly that it only took her moments to return with a cooing little bundle in her arms. She was very delicate in how she carried him, careful to keep his head firmly supported. He started to whine a little; his little fists were starting to shake.

The older witch offered the fussy little baby over to his mother and made sure to show her how to support his head. As soon as she had him in her arms he stopped fussing.

Once Hermione was sure she had a good grasp on how to hold the baby, she took the time to study him. He was very red still, which Mrs. Weasley assured her was normal. His hair and eyes where the signature Malfoy color, it was eerie to behold. His chin, however, was just as stubborn as hers. She noticed that his platinum locks had a bit of a curl to them and wondered how long he would keep those curls.

She reached a hand out to smooth his hair, taking the time to stroke his cheek. She was overwhelmed with a fierce feeling of protection for the little baby. “Will you show me how to feed him Mrs. Weasley? My son is hungry.”

Mrs. Weasley quickly showed her how to position the baby’s head and how to get him to latch onto her nipple.

It seemed her son was a fast learner. Go figure. As soon as his little lips came in contact with her nipple he began to suckle. It was a more intimate experience than she had been expecting. The last time anyone had touched her there had been that night. This act was entirely different. She could feel her magic and love flowing from her and into her son. The bonds of motherhood immediately took over the young witch.

She knew her choice was made the moment he began to suckle. She was going to raise this baby. It was not his fault how he was conceived. She felt her scarred arm tingling and desperately wanted to pull her sleeve down, but could not safely do so without disturbing her son.

“I guess I will have to choose a name for him if I am going to keep him…” The young mother stated looking down at her son. “I think, I like Bennett, it means blessed.”

“I think that is very appropriate.” Mrs. Weasley agreed barely able to contain here pride. “Hello Bennett, welcome to the world.” She greeted the young wizard with love shinning in her eyes. She looked over at her surrogate daughter and saw tears glistening.

“You and Bennett are always welcome in my home. You are a part of my family Hermione, no matter what.” She affirmed sending love and comfort to the young mother. She leaned forward and kissed Hermione on the forehead.

After the war the first thing Hermione did was try to replace her parent’s memories. Unfortunately she had done such a good job at removing those memories that it was proving near impossible to fix. She had her parents in St. Mungo’s for months before she had to face the fact that they may never remember her again. The Grangers or as they are now known the Jones’ were living their life in Australia, blissfully unaware of their daughter’s and now Grandson’s existence.

“I’m kind of glad my mum isn’t here,” Hermione mused. “I wonder what they would think of him…” She questioned aloud. Instinctively, she pulled little Bennett closer to her body.

“None of that now!” Mrs. Weasley chided. “Every young witch or wizard is a blessing. Your parents would love him if they were in their right minds. Since they cannot be here for him I will just have to give him double the love and affection in their stead.” The older witch declared determinedly.

Tears still in her eyes, Hermione looked up into the older witch’s eyes. “Bennett is lucky to have a Nanna like you…” She felt Bennett release her nipple and give a big yawn. Mrs. Weasley swelled with pride.

“Don’t let him fall asleep, Hermione, you need to burp him after he eats.”

Mrs. Wealsey proceeded to show the witch how to burp the little baby, showing her the best place to pat to ensure a tiny belch. Hermione was so grateful for Mrs. Weasley’s presence. After his burp Bennett snuggled into his mother’s arms and proceeded to fall asleep. “I’m scared, Mrs. Weasley.” The girl admitted softly. “I don’t know anything about babies…”

“Hermione,” the older witch interrupted. “You may not know anything now, but you will learn.” She placed a hand on Bennett’s head. “He will be a lot of hard work, but trust me when I say he will be worth it.”

The young mother nodded, “I would have never, I mean NEVER chosen this,” she gestured down to the sleeping baby. “but now that he is here, I can’t explain it. I have to protect him. He needs me.”

“I understand, you’re his mother, that love is so strong it forms a bond. I’ll give you some time alone together. If you need anything just call I will be near by…”

“Mrs. Weasley,” Hermione Interrupted “Could you call Harry, Ron, and Ginny? They should know about what happened, and I want to tell them. I only want to do it once though, so could I wait to tell them when they all get here?” She asked.

“Of course dear, I will tell them that you had taken ill and are in the Hospital Wing. They will come.”

She went to retrieve the pram and pulled it next to the hospital bed. “If your arms get tired or you want to take a nap you can put Bennett in here. I will go owl Ron and Harry.”

The young witch proceeded to study her baby. She wanted to know every freckle, and every finger and every toe. She was obsessed with him. The only time she put him back in his pram was when Madam Pince brought her all the books on motherhood and babies she could find in the library.

The young mother was reading one of them when Headmaster Snape came to pay a visit.

“Miss Granger, I was wondering if I could have a word with you?” he interrupted her reading with a look of trepidation.

Sensing his worry the head girl sat up a little bit higher in her bed and marked her place in her book. “Of course sir.” She replied.

“I thought we would take some time to discuss your future. What your plans are now that you have decided what to do about your baby?” He asked kindly.

“Honestly sir, I am still trying to figure out what to do with him,” she stated overwhelmed. “I haven’t thought about any plans beyond his next feeding.” She finished.

“Well it has been apparent to the staff for some time that you are well beyond any of your classmates in academics. We would be fine with you taking the next semester off and coming back to take your N.E.W.T.s and graduate with the class at the end of the year. You could take the extra time to bond with your new son.” He offered her gently. She jumped up and wrapped her arms around her Headmaster’s neck. “Thank-you sir!” she cried giving the shocked man a giant hug. He awkwardly patted her head in return.

He pulled away from the hug first and sat down in the chair Mrs. Weasley had been occupying. “What where your plans before the young…” “Bennett. “ Hermione offered. “ Bennett.” He repeated. “How apt. What where your plans before Bennett came along, if you don’t mind me asking?” He inquired.

“Well, I guess I thought I would apprentice under a Master and eventually become a Master myself. I was thinking Charms or Potions. But now I doubt I will find anyone willing to work with my new situation.” She trailed off. “Maybe I could get a job at the 3 W’s and eventually train…” she trailed off.

“Miss Granger I am shocked at you lack of initiative. I would think that a know-it-all like you would have worked a little harder at finding a way to be a mother and fulfill her academic aspirations.” He teased her gently. She started to bristle but noticed the kind look in his eyes.

“If Potions is an aspiration of yours then you could always study with me, I am a Potion Master after all. And I am sure I could speak with Professor Flitwick to see if he would be interested in taking on an apprentice. It would take a little longer than what is standard but you will have a place to live, food to eat, and plenty to occupy your mind. I am sure that you and Bennett would be very comfortable here in Hogwarts, if you choose to stay that it is.” He looked up to meet the young witch’s gaze. She had tears hanging off her eyes and was fidgeting with her hands in her lap.

“I would hug you right now but I remember how awkward it was for you earlier so I guess I should just say thanks, that would be wonderful.” She replied as the tears gently fell down her cheeks. They both sat their awkwardly for a minute before their silence was broken by the worst thing either of them had ever smelled.

The both were trying to ignore the smell for propriety’s sake but it was the Headmaster who broke first. “Merlin’s beard! What have you been feeding him?” he asked as the young witch burst into giggles. Severus watched as she cleaned and mothered her new son. It was horrible how the child came about, but the Headmaster couldn’t help admire the love he saw in the young mother’s eyes when she changed the stinky tyke.

“Miss Granger I have one more thing to discuss with you and it is not something either of us wants to talk about, but it needs to be said. I went to Malfoy Manor earlier to see the family tree. I can tell you which one is the father, if you want to know that is.” She was still holding her baby and clutched him to her chest tighter. She took a deep breath and let it out.

“I want to know, I think it would be better to know. When Bennett’s… When he gets out he will know the moment he notices the family tree, right?” she inquired. The Headmaster nodded in consent.

“Alright, then I want to know first. I want the control, for once.” She stated jaw set firmly. After what felt like hours The Headmaster answered the young mother.

“It’s Lucius’” He exclaimed and watched as she closed her eyes, took a deep breath and exhaled.

“Alright, he may have supplied the materials, but Bennett is MY baby.” She said mostly to herself.

“You are more than able to press charges if you wish to. In fact, most people who know insist. I had them wait to hear your choice.”

She knew the wizard had no idea how much his words affected her. He was giving her the power of choice, and it felt great. “If I pressed charges, there would be a real high-profile trial, wouldn’t there? Everyone would know about it…” she stated. Again the Headmaster nodded in the affirmative.

“Presumably, yes.” He affirmed.

She closed her eyes and pressed her cheek to her baby’s head. He smelled so sweet. It was then she felt it for the first time; a calming Energy enveloped her senses. “I think that while I don’t mind telling people who are close to me, I really don’t want to deal with the rumors, whispers and the pitiful glances, those would be the worst.” She replied.

“Plus, if I don’t accuse them, he can’t claim paternal rights without incriminating himself. I don’t think that is something Mal… he would be willing to do.” She finished.

“Are you sure you don’t want justice?” he inquired, making sure to give the girl all her options. “I have heard it said that not one person who faced their rapist in court has regretted it, but lots have regretted not going to court.”

She thought about his statement and then nodded her head. “Yes I am sure; I don’t want anything but peace. Peace for my son and I.” She stated. “I think a trial would be the exact opposite of peace.”

The Headmaster had to admire her intellect, even under extreme emotional pressure she was able to think clearly. “If that is what you truly want, then I will make sure your wishes are respected.” He replied.

That was when Mrs. Weasley interrupted them. “Pardon me, Headmaster, I was just informed that Harry and Ron arrived a few minutes ago.”

“Oh, Mrs. Weasley could you take Benny, I want to tell them before they meet him.” She explained. “I expect Ron not to take the news well…” she predicted.

“Mr. Weasley is not known for taking bad news well…” Snape agreed.

“He always comes around in the end though, doesn’t he?” Mrs. Weasley defended.

Hermione put Benny in the pram and Mrs. Weasley came and wheeled him into Madam Pomfrey’s office and cast a silencing charm just in time.

Not two minutes later Harry, Ron and Ginny came bounding into the Hospital Wing inquiring on their friend’s behalf. Ron was leading the charge. “Where is she?” Harry asked Madam Pomfrey.

Ron just rushed past them to check the sectioned off area. He pushed past the barrier just as Hermione was placing a book on her end table cover facing down. The Headmaster stood up and nodded curtly to the young man. “Mr. Weasley,”

Ginny and Harry came in at that moment and suddenly the small space felt very crowded. “Mr. Potter Miss Weasley.” The Headmaster acknowledged the two newcomers. “I think I will excuse myself; there are some owls’ I need to return. If you need anything, Miss Granger, just let Madam Pomfrey know.” Hermione nodded and the man turned to leave the friends to their conversations.

When Snape was on the other side of the curtain Ginny rushed over to Hermione’s side, grasping her hand. Ron ran to the other side. “Are you alright? When I got back from the dance and you weren’t in the dorm I thought you were in the library…”Ginny rushed out. In her haste to get to Hermione’s side Ginny had knocked Hermione’s book to the floor. Harry was the first one to notice and pick it up. That’s when he noticed the title, How to Care for a Baby Witch or Wizard.

“Hermione, why are you reading this?” Harry asked as he held up the book in question. Ginny took in the title and gasped. “Merlin, Hermione, You’re not PREGNANT, are you?” Ginny asked scandalously.

They could all see the rumor mill spinning through the girl’s head. Hermione could see her trying to piece together the mystery of who could be the father, without any confirmation from her friend on whether or not she actually was pregnant.

“Hermione?” Ron questioned looking completely devastated.

“What? NO! I am NOT pregnant.” She rushed out, this was not going well.

Harry let out a breath that he had been holding. “They wouldn’t tell us why you were in the Hospital Wing. Are you okay?” he asked her with concern written all over his face.

She pulled her hand from Ginny’s and took a deep breath. “I have something to tell you, and it is not something I ever wanted to say, but I can’t have you interrupt me once I start. Also I don’t want everyone to know what I am about to tell you, including any Aurors.” She looked into her friends eyes and waited for each of them to nod their consent to her request.

She pushed down her fears of rejection and shame and pulled up all the courage she had left. “Last April, when we were captured by the Snatchers and brought to Malfoy Manor, I was raped,” Ron fell into the chair by her bedside and dropped his head into his hands. “by both Draco and Lucius Malfoy.” She finished.

She looked up to see tears in both Ginny and Harry’s eyes. “Oh, Mione I am so sorry, why didn’t you ever tell us?” Ginny asked.

Ron who had been quiet this whole time jumped up out of his chair. “I’ll kill Em’!” he exclaimed and started to make his exit. “Wait Ron! Stop there is more!” she called. “MORE? How can there be bloody MORE?!” Ron cried turning around, the unrestrained rage evident. His face caused her to shrink back into her bed and whimper in fright. Ginny noticed her reaction and protectively shielded her friend from her brother.

“Calm down you wanker, you’re scaring her!” Ginny yelled at her brother. Being the only girl in a house full of boys, Ginny had developed an uncanny ability to get her brothers to listen to her. ‘It must be some ancient Weasley family magic passed down between witches.’ Hermione mussed. Ron took in the witches’ defensive posture and instantly softened.

“I’m sorry,” He started and reached for Hermione’s shoulder. She just leaned further into Ginny and away from Ron’s touch, which caused Ron to drop his hand.

They all sat there in awkward silence, Hermione was trying to figure out how to proceed, the rest were waiting patiently for their friend to continue. Ginny was rubbing soothing circles on Hermione’s back and Hermione couldn’t help feeling grateful for the support.

“Hermione, if you were attacked in April why are you in the Hospital now?” Harry finally asked.

She pulled away from Ginny’s grasp and the red head glanced at the book on the table and Hermione could see the younger witch doing the math in her head.

“I am in the Hospital Wing because apparently I have been pregnant since April… I gave birth this evening…” she trailed off avoiding the other three’s gaze.

Ginny was just staring at Hermione. Harry looked confused and Ron looked completely defeated.

“You had a Malfoy’s baby.” Ron paraphrased. She nodded, “A son, I named him Bennett.” She supplied. She called for Mrs. Weasley to bring Benny in. The older witch brought the baby over to the young mother careful to avoid her son’s gaze. Ron was staring, transfixed at the little baby, taking in his blonde hair and silvery eyes.

“Why didn’t you tell us you were pregnant?” Harry asked in wonder, still not fully believing the situation.

“I didn’t know I was pregnant, it is rare but some women don’t show the signs of pregnancies the way normal women do.” She offered cuddling her little bundle.

“Merlin Hermione, it looks just like a Malfoy.” Ron spat out angrily. Harry leaned over and gave Ron a whack on the head. “Oye! Watch your mouth!” Harry shouted.

“Boys,” Mrs. Wealsey interrupted, “No rough housing around Benny!” She cried in her typically over-protective way.

Ginny came closer and observed the little wizard. “You have your mummy’s chin, and her beautiful curls.” Ginny cooed. “He is so handsome Hermione.” She stated and Harry nodded his acceptance. The young mother’s heart lightened at her friends’ acceptance of the little tyke.

“Which one is the father?” Ron asked determinedly. His fists were clenching involuntarily.

“Ron, I hardly think that matters,” Mrs. Weasley started. “we should just love and cherish the new addition to the family.”

Ron made an odd chocking noise. “You can’t be serious?” He turned to face his mother pointing at Bennett. “THAT is not MY family. WE” he gestured to the Weasleys presents “are NOT related!” he raged. “That is nothing but a mistake. I bet it grows up to be as evil as the rest of its family!”

Tears started to fall from Hermione’s cheeks. She figured Ron wouldn’t take this well but this way really awful. Ron’s rant was interrupted by a loud slap. Mrs. Weasley had slapped her son.

“How DARE you say such hateful things to your friend? She is MY family and if you want to be in MY family you will accept that. Get out of here. You will not ruin Hermione’s special day.” The matriarch glared at her youngest son and at first Hermione wasn’t sure that Ron would back down.

Eventually he lowered his shoulders, stood up and left the Hospital Wing. His silence cut through Hermione like a knife.

While Hermione had been ignoring the wizard since the end of the war she still had feelings for him. She just wasn’t interested in a physical relationship and that was their problem. Ron was very interested in a physical relationship and made many attempts to take it there.

Hermione was heart-broken at Ron’s reaction. She knew he would never be able to accept and love her son. Whatever there was between them was over now. The tears where still streaming down her face and now she was adding soft sobs.

Mrs. Weasley came over and began patting her shoulder. “Don’t worry about him dear,” she said sympathetically. “My son is thick in the head sometimes, but he will come around. He just has a hard time expressing himself.” She amended.

“It’s true, he is the biggest thick head in all of England.” Ginny agreed. Harry nodded his agreement. She felt that calming energy wash over her again. Her sobs were quieting and she looked up into her friend’s faces and smiled.

“I should count myself lucky to have friends like you.” She commented. Ginny threw her arms around Hermione’s neck, trying not to disturb the quiet baby. That is why she didn’t notice his little hand get caught in her hair until she tried to pull away.

“Ow! He’s got me!” she cried in mock terror, effectively lightening the mood. After another hour of visiting and baby holding, Hermione and started to drift off to sleep. It was three in the morning by now and the young mother was fading fast. It was decided that Hermione needed to get some sleep.

Harry held back, he obviously had something to say. “Harry, what is it?” the young witch yawned sleepily. The sooner he said what he had to the sooner she would be able to get some sleep.

“I am sorry I wasn’t a good enough friend to you.” Harry apologized. He had her full attention, sleep was a distant memory. “What do you mean Harry?” She asked

“I obviously wasn’t a good enough friend to you, since you didn’t tell me about what happened…”

“No,” she interrupted “don’t you dare make this about you. I didn’t tell anyone until tonight. I guess I felt if I didn’t talk about it, I wouldn’t have to deal with it.” She shrugged.

“I honestly want to forget that it ever happened, but with Benny, I guess that won’t be happening.” She smiled at him. “I am so grateful to have people in my life that love me like you and Ginny and Mrs. Weasley. It means the world to me,--”

She was interrupted by a pair of strong arms being wrapped around her. “Hermione, I love you so much, you are the sister I would be lucky to have. Let’s promise to love each like this unconditionally, sister.” He whispered into her ear. She nodded and pulled back to look him square in the eyes.

“Would you be Benny’s Godfather?” she asked him and watched the smile spread across his face. He leaned forward and gave her a chaste kiss on lips. “It would be my honor.” he replied and hugged her again. “You know you are the only man I can let touch me like this… Do you think I will ever be right again?” she asked as she clutched his shoulders more fiercely. She could feel him nodding before he spoke.

“Yes, you just need time. Benny has already changed you a little. You will be fine.” He chanted as he pulled out of the hug.

“You need to get some sleep. I will watch my Godson for you.” He promptly sat down in the chair and levitated one of the baby books over to him. Hermione smiled as she felt the covers being magically drawn over her shoulders, tucking her in. ‘Love really is magical.’ She thought.

<><>{End of Chapter Two}<><>

A/N Yall don’t even know what your reviews do for my ego, so please keep em coming! I will accept positive criticisms too! :D

Next chapter we will see a new visitor for Draco and Lucius… and Hermione learning to embrace the chaos that is parenting.
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Count Your Blessings