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His Alone	By : Sevy14 Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female Views: 5080 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. All original characters are my own. I make no money from this story.

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It was one of those cold spring days. I had risen early, the birds chirping, fluttering, flying happily about outside my window, from branch to branch they sung and danced. Brushing my hair I could only look into the mirror, gaze at the person I'd become, who he made me into. I adorned a spring dress, Slytherin green with gold trim along the edges, highlighting the dress, making it shine in the early morning light. Tippy brought me my breakfast, I found myself looking out over my balcony at the green lawns and gardens that extended out from the manor below me. Sadness overtook me upon seeing the squirrels running to and fro on the lawn while I was stuck up here in this room-alone, unable to be free. A knock at my door stirs me from my thoughts and I turn just in time to see open the door and enter, a black robe, cane in hand and immaculate hair as usual.

"Do you know what you are?"

A ghostly whisper escapes my lips, "No…" I couldn't know. His thoughts are deep. Imposing. And I am not to know what he is thinking, that is not my right.

"You are nothing.

I look down. I have no response. He's made it perfectly clear from the beginning of my imprisonment that I am nothing. He's looking at me and I don't know how to stand, my hands are at my sides, I draw them to my center, trying to resist the urge to knee them but failing miserably. Still, I don't respond, the tears were threatening to come up yet I didn't let them fall, no I wouldn't allow them.

You are everything."

I am everything, yet nothing. His words don't make sense. They have no meaning and I am at a loss as to what to say. How can I have words, how can I speak? He has not given me permission.

"Is something wrong? You disagree with what I say?"

"No…"

"Good. I'm glad you know better. While you are nothing because of the disgusting blood that runs through your veins, you have the privilege of being everything… But only for today. Do you know why?"

"No…" A third time I'd uttered that I word. How I hated giving him the satisfaction of making me cry, the tears wouldn't fall, not today, not when he could see them, no they shall see another day, another time.

"How has your morning been?"

The transition from the put down to a curious inquisition of how my day has been so far is odd and I find that it leads me to turn and look at him. Only to realize that he is no longer at the door as I had previously thought but a few feet away from me, it's really quite unnerving how he can walk so quietly. "It's been well."

"Hmm. Follow me."

And I do, for what other choice to I have? None. His wish is my command.

"Are you curious as to where I am taking you?"

"I'd be lying if I said no sir. And more importantly you'd know if I were lying." He chuckles at this. A low, throaty sound and somewhere deep down inside it makes me feel warm, and the logic of my brain finds that sickening.

"Yes, yes I would."

Our talk ends there, at least for now. Leading me down the long hallways I never cease to wonder at all of the paintings, carpets the richness of it all. Everything is decadent, beautiful, and in its place, like me. I'm always in my place. I'm a good girl. I've learned. I've always been a good student and he was a good teacher, efficient in getting his point across. I was only ever told once, perhaps twice in some cases. Yes I'm still a bird, caged and singing. Sing a way mocking bird, sing away.

"Today we are going to the market. I need a new girl, perhaps more. You are pleased to be accompanying me?"

No. I don't want to go with him to get another girl. Some other poor girl that can be in his clutches until he tires of them and moves on, disposing of them in whatever manor he feels like. I long to be disposed of, a sad and depressing wish, but to save my day, to save his apparent good mood I respond with a response that I pray he approves of, the last thing I want to do is to upset him. "Yes." A lie. Surely he knows this as well as I.

"Hmm I'm sure you are. Come here, I wouldn't want you to get spliced."

"No…" I wouldn't want to get spliced, who knows what would happen to me if that were to be the case. And we're off, my stomach being pulled inside of me, my belly button twisted into knots and then we're suddenly there. We're in Knockturn Alley. Making our way to Hilda's House of Friends or as I like to think of it, Hilda's House of Slaves, that's all it really is, a home for girls and in some cases boys that are kept until they are bought by the highest bidder. Luckily, he has yet to buy any that are underage, somewhat surprising.

"I'm sorry sir, but only Madame Hilda's VIP customers are allowed to come back here. You'll have to return to the front and wait your turn to view the property that is on sale there."

"Excuse me?"

Oh my, that young man really doesn't know who he is. You can't just talk to him like that, he'll get upset. I tremble slightly at the look the shop helper gets but I'm drawn out of my thoughts by his response.

"Do you not recognize me?"

"N-no sir."

"Foolish boy! Fetch Madame Hilda. NOW!"

Off he goes, poor boy, probably pissed himself.

"What do you mean a man just came in and demanded that you-Why! Lucius! Is this the man that you stopped?"

"Y-yes Madam."

"Ai Ai. Merlin help me. Right this way Lucius, I apologize for my shop boy, he's obviously incompetent and will be cured of it as soon as the day is over. This boy, is Lucius Malfoy. He is allowed to be back here, only the best for him am I understood?"

"Y-yes miss. I apologize sir I hadn't a clue as to who you were. It won't happen again. I'm sorry."

"You're right it won't. Now Lucius, how may Madam Hilda help you today?"

"I'd like to see your property."

"Of course."

"Anything in particular?"

"Just bring them out, I'll look at them and decide. It's time I need a new toy."

"Ah, of course. Go and fetch them boy! Firewhiskey?"

"Thank you."

"Shall your-"

"She is fine."

"Of course."

I wasn't fine. No. I didn't want to be here. He knew this. Yet he kept me. The only good thing was that he didn't make me wait in the front room to be oogled at by creepy old men and their lecherus wandering hands. No, this time he allowed me to come to the back with him, I only pray that we're here for a short while.

"Sip."

"…?"

"My firewhiskey. Sip it for me. I'd like to not be poisoned girl."

"I-Of course." I don't die. It's not poisoned. Shame. I could've gone to join everyone that I love. But no, I'm still here. Breathing.

"Is this all of them?"

"Yes Lucius."

"Ahh I see."

And he gets that look on his face. Pensive. There are twelve girls before us. Three are plain janes as my mother would say. Five were blond, pretty, not entirely exquisite, and then there were three red heads, pretty as well, but not spectacular. The rest all had black hair. I hadn't a clue who he was going to pick, I didn't know his tastes at all and he gave no sign, hint of which he liked better.

"Which do you like the best?"

"Me? Well I think that you should-"

"Madame I was not speaking to you but to her."

Me? He was speaking to me. How am I to know? That doesn't make any sense. "I-I don't know sir. I, what do you-are you looking for?" How do you shop for this?

"If you wanted one, who would you choose?"

"I-Um ok let me think…" I don't know. I, normally I suppose one would choose someone you'd identify with, but in this case I am not sure if that is the best way to think. Definitely not the plain janes, nor the blonde's, his wife was blond, hell he's blond. "Uhhhh, ok, well not the-not those three o-or the blondes…Uhhh." I really wish that he'd stop looking at me like that, makes me nervous. Whoever I choose is going to hate me. "I-I, none of the ones with red hair-I think you should choose a girl from those that are left." So I hadn't really narrowed it down for him but hey, at least I saved some of them, well I'd like to think I did.

"Hmm… Her. The middle one."

"Ah lovely girl. I just got her in, fresh. You'll have to train her though, she's still a bit wild."

"Mmm my favorite. Aren't the girl?"

"Yes sir." I nod, responding, wild. I'm no longer wild. Docile and quiet just like he wanted me. Just like how he wanted me to be before he had broke me. I've been broken, he knows this; I know it and he relishes in that.

"Have her cleaned up I don't want her filthy."

"Yes of course Lucius. Anything else?"

"You'll include getting her measurements taken care of and a suitable piece of clothing for her?"

"Yes. Anything that you want Lucius."

"Lovely. How much."

"I'll throw in this one here if you-"

"No deals. How much?"

"Lucius I-"

"You're wasting my time. Here's 50 galleons. Send her to my manor when she's presentable."

"Y-yes of course."

And with that we were gone. Pulling me through the passage way and out into the dark street. I hope this day is almost over, I just want to go sit on the balcony and look at the squirrels playing on the lawn.

"You've been very good on our outing so far."

"Yes sir."

"In fact, you've been very good lately. How come you are exhibiting such good behavior?"

"I-Because it is your wish."

"Hmm very good. Come along. You may choose five books and I shall buy it for you on account of your good behavior."

"F-five books? Thank you sir." I couldn't believe my luck. He was in a terribly good mood, I was almost afraid to wonder why.

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"I am curious as to why you have been on such good behavior as of late and why you put up no protest at Madam Hilda's?"

"I-You would be displeased if I had."

"That is true. Have you lost your fire?"

"N-no."

"Then where is my little Gryffindor Princess? Why is it that she is nowhere to be found in your depths?"

"I-I am only trying to behave as you wish? I'm sorry."

"Yes well it is only curious to me that you are not acting in your usual manor. No worries, I'm pleased that you've finally come to your senses. Now, what do you think of the girl I picked out today?"

"I-If she pleases you then I am pleased."

"Really? Is that so? Haha no my dear you are not being truthful with me, shall I take away your gifts?"

"NO! I-I mean no sir. I-why do you need them sir? The girls, are they really necessary?"

"You dare question me?"

"No sir. No that was not my intention, I-I'm sorry. I was only tying to-I just… I want to understand."

"…"

"Lucius, sir, I really did not mean to offend."

"I'm sure you didn't. Now what do you think of her?"

"I-I think you'll be pleased with her."

"Hmm… And should I be pleased with you?"

"I-I have done nothing to displease you I don't think. Have I?"

"You have yet to answer my question, leading you to displease me this very moment."

"I-I'm sorry. I thought I had answered it by saying that you would be pleased with her. Is that not the answer you wanted?"

"You will return to your room."

"Yes sir."

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I don't know how many hours I'd been in my room. I'd come back after a horrible outing with him to only to upset him once we'd returned home. But I'd gained five books out of the day so I suppose it's been a good day. He has yet to call on me and I haven't had anything to eat since breakfast and now I'm terribly hungry. Calling for an elf would be useless, they don't respond anymore. I think he told them not to.

KNOCK. KNOCK.

"Poppet. Good, you're awake. Get up. Come here let me get a look at you. Hmm… I see. Yes."

"Is-is something wrong sir?"

"No. Change into this gown I must have you looking perfect for when we dine on this evening."

"I-yes sir." He's always ordering me around, which is terribly irritating. Why can't he just ask me for something? Is it that hard? Of course it is. I am nothing. A mudblood. Not even worth his time. I should be happy for his attentions. His kindness, at least that's what he would tell me. Instead of arguing, like I should, I take the dress and I head to the bathroom to change, only to be stopped by his hand upon my arm.

"Change here."

"I-But you…Yes sir." With his command, I begin to undress, first my top, then my bottoms, it becomes quite apparent that I must go without anything underneath to wear it-how humiliating. I want to throw up. Lucius, he just stands there as though nothing is wrong, horrible about this situation. I can feel his eyes on me as I change, my stomach is churning as his eyes undress me even as I undress myself. "I've finished."

"So you have. Is your dress suitable?"

"I-" The dress was beautiful. Truly. Lucius had outdone himself and I, although I loath to admit it, the dress not only was beautiful it made me look beautiful. Even though my hair was not elegant or stylish as the dress, plain, so very plain like me. "Yes." What else could I say? The only response that he would find acceptable.

"Hmm…"

We stand there. I have nothing to do, nowhere to go, I just stood there before him, looking at his chest. My hands start to fidget and I feel the silk beneath my fingertips, I look down. A soft smile begins to grace my lips and suddenly I remember how very real this prison is. How I will never escape on my own, how my presence from this place will only cease to a mere memory, a faint imprint upon the walls of my room, fabric of my sheets when he says so. When he says it must be. Only then shall I be free to go, free of my life, of his adoration. And I become sad at this, I feel my smile fading and my mood begins to go south. This prison is horrible, the dress is horrible, he is horrible. I want to die. Leave.

"Come along."

And I do. I follow him. Out the door, left, down the long hallway, my feet stepping quietly upon the carpet, then gliding down the stairs, my dress, floating absent mindedly around me as though lifted up by the air.

"Wait. I must fix your hair, it is atrocious."

I whisper, "I'm sorry." What else am I supposed to say? It isn't my fault. I have no means to make it beautiful, I am not beautiful. I am plain. Just a mudblood, filthy, worthless, and his.

"There. Much better. Now, we dine."

POP!

"Master a womens is heres for yous. Shes has a somethings fors yous."

"Ahh, perfect. Hermione, dear, why don't you come with me."

"Madam Hilda."

"Master Malfoy. I believe this belongs to you."

"Yes. Yes. She looks… ok. Don't you think dear? We should be able to clean her up just fine."

I think that I might throw up. The girl looks as though she is about to be sick, just like me, although I think it might be for a different reason. I am no longer afraid of Lucius, that has passed a long time ago. But she must be afraid of him, a strange man, a man that is incredibly intimidating and his eyes aren't kind or happy. They're deep and full of false sincerity and hope. Surely, even she can see that.

"Hermione. What shall we name her?"

"Wh-what?"

"What shall we name her, you get to decide my dear. For this one, you decide."

"Oh… Um, well, what is your name?" She doesn't speak. Not a sound, she just looks at me, her wide eyes are scared and watery, tears are about to fall. "Oh well ok… How about Sonia?" Sonia, where did that come from? That was the name of my dog when I was five. Why did I give her that name? This girl isn't a dog, nor does she deserve the name of one. "I-I am not sure, what would you like to call her sir, she is more for you than anyone."

"Haha."

He chuckles, my stomach is about to give way. I hate it when he chuckles.

"My dear you quite right. She IS for me. That she is and Sonia, that'll do just fine. Just fine. Though I must ask, why Sonia?"

"I-It is a good name, pretty, like her." I have to give her something. Some sense of confidence, or hope or-a sense of having an ally. Well, as much of an ally as I can be. I truly hope she won't be kept in the dungeons, I hate that place, it's vile and horrid. He is vile and horrid.

"Hmm she is decent. Pretty, I am not sure, nor do I by what you have said but that will be a conversation for later. Understood?"

"Yes sir." He saw through my lie. Like always. I hate him for his ability to see through my face, my feelings, I hate him.

"Now, Hilda, thank you for delivering… Sonia, I bid you a good night."

"Yes of course. Now girl, you will be good. I shall not be happy if I find you back on my door step so do what you are told and Master Malfoy will be good to you, just like he is with her."

Her comment upset me, in fact, it made me irate. How dare she say that about me. I am nothing like the girls he brings back from her whore house. I am not his slave, not-not like that anyways and I-I am… I am NOT his source of sexual comfort. How dare she. I must have made a sound because Madam Hilda looks at me and the hand that Lucius has rested on the small of my back it flexes somewhat and I tense up, the last thing I want to do is upset him, not after the day we've had, he's been very nice and I want to keep him in the good mood.

"Have I said something to upset your girl Lucius?"

Her tone, I want to slap it right out of her mouth. But I won't. I know better. Lucius would be very upset.

"No. I'm sure she's just hungry. Good evening Madam Hilda. Sonia, come along."

We turn to leave, Sonia, the newest girl to be thrust into his clutches looks scared out of her mind, I would be to, I remember when I was.

"Wait here."

And then, I was alone once again.
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His Alone