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You Can\'t be Serious	By : Aridethdar Category: Harry Potter > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 16271 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 8
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor do I make any money off of this. Harry Potter belongs to the lovely J K Rowling ~

Chapter List
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Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, the wonderful J K Rowling does. And I don't make any money off of this.

Summary:Harry's name came out of the goblet and something inside him kind of... snapped. No longer is he Gryffindor's Golden Boy who would sacrifice his life for those who can't even show an ounce of loyalty. With new friends and allies, Harry is about to change the world... But will it be for the better? Who is this sexy new ally? And why is Draco eyeing him like a tasty… HP/TD/DM

Warnings: Bad language is all I can think of there being for this chapter…

A/N: My Octoberfest is still going strong! (Info on profile!) FYI, writing a French accent is a biatch! lol

oOoOoOo

You Can't be Serious

Chapter Two: Caged Core

Beta: The awesome sapphyredragon_rn (whom unleashed the plot bunny in the first place XD lol)

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'Well here's another fine mess I've gotten myself into.'Harry thought as he sat patiently on the examining table listening to the Healer talk to him…

In rabid French. Not rapid French, rabid. Because he was pretty sure she would start foaming at the mouth any moment with how angry she seemed. He could only hope that it wasn't something he did, but as time went on he wasn't so sure.

"Madame Zoe, zee poor boy cannot speak our language." The Headmistress smiled and shook her head fondly at the lovely silver haired Healer's antics.

To Harry it seemed that the large woman had been enjoying the show. He didn't know if he should be worried or not, but it appeared the Headmistress had been amused by the other female and not because of his discomfort so he decided to let it slide…

Finally shown some mercy in regards to the Beauxbatons' Healer and able to relax a bit, Harry watched as the woman stopped. The lady, who looked too young to have hair so silver, took a deep breath before she counted to what Harry thought might be ten. He couldn't be sure, seeing as he didn't speak French, but seeing as she only said ten words… it didn't take a rocket scientist to make an educated guess.

"O'o raised you?" Madame Zoe asked sweetly and Harry eyed her warily.

"My Aunt and Uncle, Madame…" Harry replied, still confused as to why she was asking. What did his "loving relatives" have to do with his headache?

"W'at eez eet, Zoe?" Madame Maxime inquired, honest concern in her eyes.

"W'at eez eet? W'AT EEZ EET? I'll tell you w'at eet eez! I want zee 'ead of ooever 'as been zo called raizing zee boy!" Madame Zoe's tone was down right deadly and Harry almost felt sorry for his relatives.

Almost.

"I take eet your diagnoses revealed somezing more zan just a 'eadache?" Fleur spoke up for the first time from the corner they had sent her to when she refused to leave.

"'Ou 'ave no idea." The silver haired woman sighed. "Can I speak wiz 'ou a momen' in private, Olympe?"

"I zink zee c'ild s'ould be allowed to 'ear since eet conzerns 'im."

The Headmistress looked at the Healer, then Harry, and back again while she contemplated the issue. It was a good minute before she sighed and looked the silver haired woman in the eye, prepared to stand her ground.

"I zink zee c'ild s'ould be allowed to 'ear since eet conzerns 'im." Madame Maxime stated firmly, though her stance faltered slightly at the look the Healer gave her.

"'Ou zink ee s'ould 'ear, oui?" The question earned a nod from the large woman. "Very well." Zoe shook her head, which caused a few silver strands to escape her bun, before she turned her silver eyes towards Harry.

Harry, in reaction, scooted away from the Healer. Whether her intentions were kind or not, the medical professional was so much more intense than Madam Pomfrey and quite frankly… She scared the crap out of him!

'But she's a female, and as such she is the protective type…' Harry reminded himself in an attempt to calm down. 'Right?'He had to wonder, especially with how Madame Zoe looked at him.

"Make 'ou a deal." Madame Zoe offered and Harry cocked his head to the side.

He'd never had an adult offer to make him a deal before, usually they did what they wanted regardless and he just had to go with the flow.

"What kind of deal?" It might be an oddity for an adult to willingly compromise with him, but he wasn't foolish enough to jump in head first. He'd learned the hard way, time and again, that a Gryffindor mentality is rather painful.

A pain which could be avoided if he would just put a little thought into his actions. Besides, Harry decided that if he was going to let his "Slytherin" side out then he would make it a point to stay out of the Hospital Wing… preferably for the entire year.

'Which will be damn near impossible because of the bastard that put my name in the cup.'

"Eef I explain abou' ore health, will 'ou geeve me ore Aunt and Uncle's addrez?"

"Zoe! 'ou cannot ask for such a zing!"

"'Ou are sounzing like a stalker." Fleur laughed and sat down next to Harry.

Apparently she had used everyone's distraction to escape the corner she had been confined to. Not that Harry would complain. He did like having the blonde nearby. She was loving and caring and acted like what he imagined his mother would have.

'Granted, she's really much to young to be a mother but… She will make an amazing mum when she does become one.'

"I am no' stalking 'im. I merely weesh to 'ave a word wiz ZEM." Zoe stated before she grumbled something that sounded a lot like, "and 'ex zem into oblivion," but Harry could just have been hearing things.

However, if Harry had indeed heard her correctly, then he would be happy to hand the horrid Muggles to her. On a silver-freaking-platter!

"Wat 'as got 'ou in a tizzy?" The giantess inquired and Harry waited patiently for the Healer's reply.

"Wat 'as…" Zoe growled before she stopped to take a deep breath and count to ten.

Harry was sure that is what she was doing, the signs were there regardless of whether he could understand the verbal lanuage, the body language was loud and clear.

"'is magikal core eez quite powerful." Zoe stated, seemingly out of nowhere.

"Zat… Zat eez good?" Madame Maxime asked rather than stated, sensing a trap.

"Oui, eet is bien!" The silver haired woman agreed with a smile. "Too bad ee eez unable to USE EET!" She scowled and Harry found himself in Fleur's lap.

Whether she had placed him there or he'd jumped so bad at the Healer's tone to cling to the blonde, Harry was unsure. Either way? He was comfy and Fleur seemed content to pet his hair, so it was a win-win.

Now if only he could figure out what the Healer had meant by him being unable to use his magical core…

'Sometimes the best way to get answers is the simple way… ask.' Harry thought and looked at the silver haired woman, who was still glaring daggers at the woman who was five times her size.

The funny part? Madame Maxime actually seemed scared of the petit female.

"Pardon… um, what's that mean? Me not being able to, er, use my magical core?" He asked in a meek tone. He wanted to attracted the Healer's attention, not incure her wrath.

Silver eyes turned on Harry and softened before the lady sighed and walked toward the bed.

"Eet means zat 'ou 'ave encased eet in a magikal, 'ow do 'ou say… er, cage of sorts." Zoe answered in a calm tone.

"I did it?" Well, that was something new to him. How in the world had he managed that? And when? He didn't recall doing anything of the sort.

"Oui… Eet is uncommon, but zere 'ave been cases w'ere a c'ild will close off zere magik… on rare occazions, making zem no more zan a Squib."

Fleur gasped and Madame Maxime looked grim.

'Seems they understand the implications… I have a feeling I know what this is about, but to be sure…'

"I'm… practically a Squib?"

"Non! 'ou 'ave access to ore magik, just… only a porzion. 'ou would be far stronger s'ould 'ou no' 'ave zee block." Zoe tried to explain.

"Um… how? I don't remember…"

"'Ou never weeshed to be normal?"

Harry stared at the Healer in honest shock. Sure, when he was younger he wished he was normal. He had hoped that, one day, he wouldn't be a freak and then he could be loved too. But that had never happened. Weird things continued to happen, just not as often and…

'Oh Merlin… I did it to myself? For those bastards I call relatives?'Harry thought in horror and the look on the Healer's face told him that she understood what was going through his head. "Can I fix it?"

There was no "can I" to it, he HAD to fix it! There was no way he would stand a chance against Voldemort and his lot otherwise. Not that the man was back, per se, but as Harry had learned in his first and second year… the Dark Lord was determined to return and his followers were still loyal.

'Okay… I've got to fix this. Because I wished to be normal, it should work in reverse right?'

"Eet can be fixed, oui, but 'ou will 'ave to see me daily for a time." Zoe stated soothingly. "Oh, and eet will be required zat 'ou never return to ore relatives." She nodded. "Eef I am to 'elp, I do not weesh for zem to undo my work. I will perzonally see to eet zat zay do no' get zere 'ands on 'ou again. Are 'ou wiz me?" The questioned was directed at the giantess.

"But of course! I will perzonally apply for custody so zat ee will 'ave a place no matter wat." The Headmistress declared and Fleur made a sound of agreement.

"I will talk to my family as well." The blonde nodded. "Zee Delacours 'ave a lot of pull in zee French Ministry." She explained when Harry had a confused look on his face.

"I don't think the Headmaster will allow it…"

"Ee 'as no auzority wen eet comes to c'ildren outzide zee sc'ool! O'o does ee zink ee iz?" Was it just Harry, or did Madame Zoe's accent get thicker when she was angry?

"Merlin's second coming?" Harry joked in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Judging from the look of pure murder in the Healer's eyes… his humor either didn't work, or hadn't come across properly as a joke.

"Dozen't surprize me."

Apparently they had taken him seriously.

'With the way the man acts sometimes…'

"Miss Delacour, contact ore family. I want to speak wiz zee Minister post 'aste." Madame Zoe commanded. "Now, come along 'Arry." She smiled and gently grabbed his hand to help him off of Fleur's lap. "We 'ave work to do." Her grin made the young teen worry.

'Is she bi-polar?'

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A/N: Watch out Harry! Your manipulations might come back to bite you in the arse… or land you in France, as the case may be. Looks like our little Harry might want to consider learning French XD lol Good thing: he's got the ladies on his side! Bad thing: they are possessive Oo;; lol

Thank you to all who have reviewed! They are all appreciated!

[Posted: October 9, 2012 Updated: …]
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You Can\'t be Serious