Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

If Only	By : Blankk Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 20372 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 5
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor do I make any money off of it.

Chapter List
- 1-Hotels
- 2-Homewrecker
- 3-Decisions
- 4-Falling
- 5-Grins
- 6-Walls
- 7-Mind
- 1
- 2
- 3
‘I can’t believe this,’ she muttered before breaking eye contact and rolling over onto the other side of the bed.
Malfoy studied her curiously.
‘Does this make you feel guilty?’
‘No,’ she responded. ‘The only inkling of guilt I have is based on the fact that I’ve kept up this sham of a relationship for so long.’
‘Why are you still with him?’
She groaned internally. Leave it to Malfoy to ask the hard hitting questions she didn’t want to answer. She’d asked herself the same question before she’d ever slept with Malfoy. She still had the same answer.
‘I don’t know.’
Malfoy scoffed. He couldn’t believe that was a serious answer.
‘Really? Hermione Granger fulltime Know-It-All doesn’t have a response. That’s rich. Merlin have mercy on us all.’
‘Fuck you, Malfoy. I’ve really tried to think this through logically. It’s more complicated that you think.’
‘And the complication is…’
‘I don’t want to cause a rift between our friends and families. I know it’s hard for you to wrap your head around because you’re an arsehole who hates almost everyone. I care.’
‘Too much it seems.’
Hermione frowned as she sat up. Maybe Malfoy had a point about how she cared too much. Wasn’t it illogical to continue a relationship with Ron when her feelings had faded away? If they had ever gotten to the point where he’d propose to her she would definitely turn him down. Perhaps that was what she was waiting for? A moment where she wouldn’t have to start up that dreaded conversation. She was a pathetic excuse of a human being. At this point in their relationship there was no sense of comfort, only the reality of routine. They hardly talked to one another about anything except their jobs. Hell, when they ate dinner with each other, which was a rarity, she couldn’t even look at him. He never pressed up against her in their bed anymore pestering her for sex. There was no intimacy between them anymore, not even the small pecks or I Love You’s seemed to mask the fact that they’d turned into strangers. Hermione didn’t know him anymore. She didn’t want to. He used to seem so sweet and innocent to her. My, how times had changed. She was too consumed with the idea of what everyone else thought or what their expectations were. Wasn’t that the reason she had tried to detach herself away from the Wizarding World? She wasn’t making any damn sense.
‘Christ, what is wrong with me?’
‘Do you really want me to answer that?’
Hermione shot daggers with her eyes. ‘No!’
She stood to make her way to the bathroom while tying up her hair in a bun, it helped her concentrate on her thoughts without being bothered by tendrils of hair constantly tickling the back of her neck. It seemed like ages now that she had become so comfortable walking around naked which is why she didn’t try to shy away when she saw Malfoy’s eyes studying her. She felt a small throb start in her lower stomach.
‘Stop it!’ Hermione hissed.
Malfoy smiled. It was still astonishing to her that he could smile at all. After being around the git for years and only seeing a smirk it was refreshing to see a genuine smile that reached his eyes and brightened up his entire face. She sounded like a lovesick ninny. Too bad she couldn’t say anything positive about the way she currently looked. She examined the black smear around her eye in the mirror before reaching for a toothbrush.
‘You look like a pervert when you smile like that, you know?’ she called out from the bathroom.
‘Really?’ Malfoy asked. ‘That cuts me deep, Granger.’
‘Oh, shut up,’ she replied with her head stuck out of the door frame and a tooth brush lodged into the side of her mouth. ‘I cannot even think of one thing I could say that could hurt you.’
She wasn’t exactly right. He could think of at least one thing she could say that might hurt him. Still, he smiled and pretended otherwise even though she was hidden away in the bathroom rinsing out her mouth. He had started this…arrangement with the thought that he would be using Granger for good pussy. Somehow he had developed feelings for her. A girl had never made him feel anxious because there was a possibility that she could stand him up. Never had Draco Malfoy been stood up. It was almost laughable when he sat in that hotel room until midnight a few months ago. He watched the sunset alone. Went through a bottle of wine alone. He went home slightly drunk to find an owl waiting for him at the window. ‘I’m sorry, something came up last minute. Hope you didn’t stay long. HG’ No, of course not, he had only wasted 16 hours of the day sitting around like a knob. He supposed that he should be thankful that he hadn’t had any feelings of jealously when it came to her relationship with Ron. Anyone with eyes could see that their relationship had completely fallen apart. Hermione and Malfoy avoided each other when they were outside in the ‘Real World’, as she liked to call it, but the times when he did see her interacting with others she looked miserable. It was so clear to him when he looked into her eyes, took in the forced mannerisms, the cold body language and the out of character inflections in her voice. It was strange. Almost as though he was seeing another person. They were all so fucking thick to be fooled by her. She was a horrible liar. There was only one time when she had noticed him, she was with that Weasley girl. For once she didn’t look like she had a grey cloud looming over her, he was seeing her for who she was. Her amber eyes caught the light showing off the darker ring around her iris and he noticed she was looking directly at him with a smile on her face. He wondered if he should ignore her, but then he felt his head nod acknowledging her. It was all over so fast like it almost didn’t happen.
Hermione was back in the bedroom with a fluffy bath robe on. Malfoy hadn’t moved from his spot. His eyes were closed and his face was relaxed. Sometimes he really did have the face of an angel, only because his face was so painfully perfect. She wanted to kiss a trial along his face until she steeled herself and tried to push the thought away. She couldn’t imagine Malfoy accepting any form of blatant affection after sex. Really, she wasn’t affectionate anyway. At least she hadn’t been with Ron. Malfoy’s eyes opened then as if he knew she was staring at him. Hermione turned away and started to look around for her discarded clothes.
‘Are you leaving now?’
‘No,’ she smiled while pulling out her shrunken purse out of her cardigan pocket. ‘I thought we could catch some dinner.’
‘You…what?’
He watched Hermione pull out sheer black underwear from her purse. She shimmied it on. He’d never seen this pair before. He figured he hadn’t seen the majority of her underwear collection but these ones were intriguing. There was a small rounded shape on the back of her underwear almost like a keyhole with a small bow above it. It accentuated the dip in her ass.
‘You’d better turn around if you want to leave this room,’ he murmured.
Hermione blushed slightly before stepping in her dress.
‘I need help zipping up,’ she said as her head turned to meet his eyes.
She felt Malfoy behind her in an instant, she hadn’t even heard him get out of the bed. His hands ran down her sides before he pulled the zipper up to close her dress. Goosebumps broke out on her arms as she felt his breath brush past her neck.
‘I don’t need dinner,’ he whispered. ‘You’re a treat.’
‘Didn’t your mother ever tell you that dessert came last? Or were you bratty enough to manipulate her into giving you your dessert first thing?’
His chuckle was breathy. ‘Now, now. You don’t want to bring my mother into this conversation, Granger. But if you must know, I can be very convincing when it matters.’
Of course she knew how convincing he could be. Who could really convince her it was a good idea to have sex at work like she was a hormonal teenager? How else could she explain the desecration of the book shelves? Rutting up against one another in a less frequented section close to the back where they were covered sufficiently from unsuspecting eyes. Who really wanted to see the book shop girl being fucked six ways from Sunday? She had had to go through the surveillance footage and tamper with it before her supervisor thought she was some hussy making a few extra dollars on the side sleeping with customers.
‘Trust me when I say that I’m well aware of your talent.’
‘Naturally,’ he remarked as he stepped away to find his belongings. ‘You’ve gotten off easy this time, Granger. You’re lucky your stomach grumbles as loud as it does. I don’t want to be the cause of your starvation.’
She felt her face burn in embarrassment, she didn’t even notice her stomach growling. Only a prat would point that out. She put her cardigan on.
‘I suppose you’ve ventured out into Muggle London before.’
‘Not really. Except for that time some silly woman took me to a place called Mickey Donalds.’
Hermione giggled. ‘Really? Mickey Donalds. I haven’t heard of that one yet.’
‘It left a lot to be desired so you aren’t missing out are you. Actually, on second thought, the chips were better than the ones we used to get in the Great Hall.’
Hermione stared at him in disbelief. Draco Malfoy was talking about enjoying chips from McDonalds? She had to get the hell out of here.
‘I didn’t know you were such a chip aficionado, Malfoy,’ she said with a huge grin on her face.
‘Sod off.’
----------
Hermione would’ve hailed a taxi, but it was Malfoy’s idea to walk. Venturing around Muggle London with Malfoy was strange, but it was better than she had expected. He seemed comfortable around the large groups of Muggles, he didn’t bat an eye. Even though it was later in the evening the streets were still as busy as ever. Hoards of people were dressed up to go to the clubs or the pubs to have a good time. They had passed by a flashy looking club that Malfoy pointed out.
‘I think I’ve been there.’
Hermione’s eyebrow rose. ‘Club Aquarium?’
He smiled. ‘Ridiculous.’
‘My cousin mentioned it had a pool inside. Is that true?’
‘Yes, which is why Theodore Nott wanted to go in the first place.’
Several minutes passed before Hermione stopped in front of a restaurant.
‘Yes, this is the place. Nando’s!’
Malfoy looked confused. ‘Nan – who?’
She pointed towards the sign before grabbing his hand to pull him inside. It was fairly busy with a slightly long queue. He was hit with the scent of grilled chicken and a mixture of spices. He could smell chips too. It was clear to Hermione that he’d never ordered fast food. He probably didn’t understand the concept of ordering food away from a restaurant table. Now she could see his discomfort and how unsure he looked about venturing outside with her. He’d get over it eventually. She equated it to the first time she had ever seen food appear seemingly out of nowhere in the Great Hall. She’d read about it weeks before attending Hogwarts, but there was a remarkable difference between reading and actually experiencing what she had read. It was a bit funny that food appearing in the middle of a table was more normal for him than ordering food that required you to wait in a queue. Cultural differences, she thought. Two extremely different worlds.
‘Malfoy, do you see that spot over there? Just nab that table. I’ll be a moment.’
He nodded and quickly headed over to the comfy looking red upholstered booth. The lighting in the restaurant was quite dim even though there was a lamp hanging above the booth. It was oddly loud in the restaurant and there weren’t any waiters walking around taking orders from the tables. Somehow people had food being served to them. Maybe Muggles really were as innovative as Granger had said. He knew they weren’t stupid, at one time he believed they were denser than a house-elf on a good day. His father was able to control his morals and beliefs for the better part of his childhood. Of course by the time he had turned sixteen it was much harder for his father to keep any sort of hold on Draco. It was his period of rebellion. He tried not to bring up the harsh memories of the past, but sometimes they managed to bleed through the barrier he had put up. His relationship with his father was nonexistent now, not that they had had a strong relationship to begin with. There was no love lost. The only person holding them together was his mother. She was able to calm Lucius’ temper despite how stubborn he could be. He doubted his father respected him, but he didn’t care anymore. He wasn’t twelve years old vying for his father’s attention and acceptance. At least his father hadn’t tried to write Draco out of his inheritance again. The first time he had tried Narcissa hexed him so viciously he was stuck in his bed for a month. His mom was highly overprotective over Draco even though he was legally an adult. And truth be told he still lived at home in a distant part of the Manor where he didn’t have to see his parents if he didn’t want to. He knew his mom loved that he still lived at home because she could keep tabs on him. One of these days he’d move out just to be able to have a house to himself.
‘I’m glad you look less…sickly.’
Hermione shuffled herself onto the opposite side of the booth. She had ordered basic items off of the menu. She wasn’t sure what Malfoy enjoyed to eat and she decided it didn’t matter because she was sure to find out tonight.
‘Charming, Granger,’ he replied.
‘How do you like it?’ she asked while she slipped off her cardigan.
‘It’s different.’
‘Better than Mickey Donalds?’
‘Much.’
Hermione was still expecting an awkward silence to ensue between the two of them. It would’ve been easier to Apparate to their final destination. The weather in London this evening was agreeable, not too humid and not too cool. When Malfoy suggested that they walk she was a little surprised because she didn’t think he’d take the time to walk anywhere, let alone Muggle London. It was more surprising that they had managed to get along the entire time. Actually, maybe it wasn’t so surprising because they got along quite well in the bedroom. Except this was the first time they had ever gone anywhere outside of the hotel room. Out of all the possibilities Hermione would have never thought Malfoy would end up as her…lover. Hermione never thought she would be a cheater either.
‘Isn’t it a little weird that this is the first time we’ve had a meal together?’
‘Not entirely,’ he snorted. ‘You used to be paranoid about people seeing us together.’
‘True,’ she muttered.
Was this a sign of her carelessness? Was she getting too comfortable?
‘Merlin, don’t start with your bloody overthinking. I don’t think I could bear it.’
‘Malfoy, seriously think about this. I know there’s a risk. I don’t know if I care that anyone finds out or not. Of course I’d much rather confess to it myself but—‘
‘Stop,’ he said. ‘Not here. Not now.’
And that was when the waiter came with their food. He was the typical English bloke in London, Hermione guessed he had to be around their age. She didn’t pay much attention to him except for when he stated what was on the plates. She had ordered a chicken wrap for herself and a grilled chicken burger for Malfoy, they both had chips.
‘He was making moony eyes at you.’
‘What?’ she asked.
‘The waiter.’
‘What about him?’
‘He was eyeing you.’
‘Malfoy, just try the burger.’
----------
The chips were great, he hadn’t cared much for the sandwich she called a ‘burger’. Hermione looked like she enjoyed her meal, she ended up giving him the remainder of her chips. Hermione suggested that they Apparate back to the hotel, he felt too full to walk back so he obliged. Once they were at the hotel Hermione was quiet. She laid in the middle of the bed staring at him as he toed his shoes off.
‘I won’t go home tonight,’ she said quietly. ‘Will you stay?’
He nodded and climbed into the bed with her. ‘Odd…’
‘I can’t go back to the flat.’
He nodded again and left her to her thoughts.
----------
‘Be honest, do you think I’m making a mistake?’
‘No.’
Hermione felt frustrated with herself. She was supposed to make rational decisions and right now it felt like she didn’t know what she was doing. The answer should’ve been easy when Ron came home smelling like patchouli. She had brushed it off because it wasn’t unusual that he worked closely with his colleagues. It was unusual when he started coming home later in the night. She felt relieved, which was wrong. Part of her felt hurt that he thought she was thick enough to completely miss the signs that she was being cheated on. Letters that he received would incinerate once he was done reading them and he would leave minutes later blaming it on ‘the damn Ministry’. Really, what was wrong with her?
‘He’s cheating on me,’ she said turning onto her side to face Malfoy.
‘I know.’
She frowned. ‘You know?’
Malfoy sighed. ‘I didn’t want to have this conversation with you.’
‘I think I deserve to know.’
‘And you’re sure about this?’
‘Positive.’
Malfoy started off by telling her each encounter was purely a coincidence. He told her about Ron’s date at the Leaky Cauldron of all places. Ron could never pull off any amount of stealth no matter how hard he tried. Malfoy mentioned the small brushes along the woman’s wrist as Ron’s arm stretched out onto the table. How Ron’s hand would rest on the small of her back. How they held hands as they made it up the stairs towards a bedroom. Their unkempt appearance when they finally left separately. Anyone in the vicinity could have put two and two together. He had seen them again at a café called Juniper Leaves. This time they had come in after Malfoy and they were unaware of the fact that he was in the booth behind them. He knew Eloise’s prissy and grating voice.
‘Ron, you keep telling me you’re going to leave her.’
‘I know. I know. It’s just that we have so many years between us it’ll be hard to break it off. Come on Eloise, you know you can trust me.’
‘You’re right,’ she giggled. ‘I do trust you.’
‘And you know that I love you, right?’
Hermione didn’t look stunned. Or even shocked. She looked…she looked like she hadn’t heard a single word he had said.
‘Granger? Are you okay…?’
‘Never been better,’ she replied simply. ‘This isn’t a mistake.’
‘I thought you’d at least be a little hysterical.’
‘Nothing to be hysterical about. It’s obviously been over for ages.’
She wasn’t even jealous. That’s how she knew she couldn’t have cared any less. Fuck Ron. Why had she ever taken his feelings into consideration when he was blatantly cheating on her? Maybe Harry knew. Jesus, maybe Ginny knew and that’s why she had been so adamant that Hermione was better off alone. They had wasted so much time playing up this horrible farce that didn’t convince anybody. Maybe everyone knew the relationship was falling apart and they held onto their expectations in hopes that their relationship would repair itself. Why was this happening to her? Even Draco fucking Malfoy knew. Who else had known this was going on? She had been so secretive about her affair when Ron didn’t give one rat’s arse about who found out.
Hermione’s eyes narrowed. ‘Tell me something, Malfoy. Who else knows?’
‘Considering the amount of people in the Leaky Cauldron on a Friday evening, I’d say there are a lot of people who know,’ Malfoy smirked. ‘Weasley never was the inconspicuous sort was he?’
Hermione stood up and started pacing. She caught glimpse of the notepad on the nightstand and wrote two words on it. Malfoy watched her use a spell he wasn’t familiar with and the paper in the palm of her hand disappeared.
‘I’ve never heard of that spell before.’
‘Created it.’
He scoffed. ‘And this is the woman wasting away working in a Muggle bookstore?’
‘Hey! I’m not wasting away,’ she protested. ‘Does it really look like I want the attention? I can see it all on the Daily Prophet. ‘Hermione Granger, Part-Time Homewrecker, Invents a New Spell!’ Rita Skeeter would have a field day with that tripe. Gods. Can you just imagine? You’d be in it too by the way.’
‘I don’t have very much to lose do I?’ he snorted. ‘Except for my dear old father possibly going into cardiac arrest for being a blood traitor. Although I suppose my mother has already mentioned you to him.’
‘Your mother already – what?’
‘She keeps tabs on me, Granger.’
‘So, what you’re telling me is that there is a possibility that your mother just might be talking about me over dinner at Malfoy Manor?’
‘Small possibility.’
‘To your father?’
‘Unless she’s gossiping to all those other high society dogs.’
Hermione’s mouth was wide open. ‘Malfoy, please tell me this is a sick joke.’
‘Maybe,’ he murmured. ‘Keep your mouth shut it’s giving me ideas.’
‘Malfoy, please.’
‘I doubt she’s gossiping about me, Granger. I can’t be sure if she’s told my father because we don’t even look at one another.’
Now Hermione was stunned. Everyone knew that the Malfoy family wasn’t close to perfect even though Narcissa had tried her best to do damage control once the war was over. Lucius Malfoy was still head of the house, but he was hardly ever seen outside in public. For awhile the papers reported that he was gravely ill with a magical sickness Voldemort had bestowed upon his traitorous Death Eaters. It was a pathetic rumour someone had pulled out of their arse. She had never given much thought about his father even though Malfoy was basically a spitting image of him with shorter hair and a smaller nose. At Hogwarts she knew that his relationship with his father was strained, but she couldn’t imagine that they had stopped talking to one another. How was it possible that Malfoy hadn’t been disowned then? Surely Lucius Malfoy would be hard pressed to change his views on the purity of blood. Malfoy had never mentioned his family before now so she had assumed everything was fine. Obviously Malfoy didn’t look very bothered by the fact that his relationship with his father had deteriorated. Why was she putting so much thought into this?
‘I can see the wheels turning, Granger. You can stop now.’
Hermione glanced at him. ‘I just had no clue.’
‘You weren’t meant to know.’
‘I mean, why haven’t you been shunned? Shouldn’t you have been disowned?’
‘You can thank my mother for that.’
‘Ah.’
It made sense.
‘Is that all?’
‘I had no clue that Draco Malfoy was such a Mummy’s Boy.’
----------------------------------------------

AN:

I don't know where this is going at all. I know I said I didn't know if I'd add anything to this story. Proven myself wrong haven't I? I tried my best to try and give some backstory where I could. Sorry again if it's disjointed, please bear with me. Thanks to the two reviews that I've received you are both very sweet I couldn't stop myself from saying 'awww' aloud. Thank you. It motivated me enough to shell out this chapter despite the fact that I have a project due and exams tomorrow.
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