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Muggle Things	By : RavieSnake Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 54521 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 8
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the concepts or characters from it. I make no money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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A/N: Thank you cpetnm, starr, HG4eva, Anon, Marvolo, Trelweny, and Monkemom for the reviews!
@ Trelweny: Sorry to hear about that person's injury! They are dangerous. But like you said...they can be fun as well.
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Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures: Being Division
Draco read the plaque on the reception desk as he stepped up to it. He glanced around at the empty waiting area before turning his attention to the bedraggled old witch sitting behind the desk. The witch paid him no attention as she perused a Witch Weekly magazine and snapped loudly at a piece of gum.
Draco cleared his throat. The witch simply turned a page.
“Pardon me?”
The witch glanced up at him briefly and looked back down at her page. “Can I help you?” she asked curtly.
Draco furrowed his brow at her rudeness. “I’m looking for Miss Granger’s office,” he said coolly.
The woman set down her magazine and narrowed her eyes at him. She looked him up and down before jabbing a thumb over her shoulder in the direction of a long hall to the left of the desk.
“Down the hall. Third door on the left,” she answered, still smacking her gum.
“You’ve been most helpful, thank you,” Draco said dryly. The witch merely rolled her eyes and went back to her magazine as he started down the hall. He walked slowly down the dimly lit hall and then stopped before the third door and read another small plaque.
S.P.E.W. Director: Hermione Granger
With a deep breath, Draco knocked on the door. When he heard a faint ‘come in’ he opened the door and peered inside to see Hermione bent over a desk scribbling at a parchment with a Muggle pen. Draco smirked at her writing utensil and then stepped inside and pulled the door closed behind him. Hermione raised a finger without looking up.
“I’m almost done, Harry. I just want to finish this report and then we can head out if you like,” she said.
“It’s not Harry,” Draco said. Hermione snapped her face up from her parchment to look at him. Her eyes widened and Draco reached for the door handle. “I’m sorry I intruded. You’ve obviously got plans. I’ll just…”
“No,” Hermione interrupted, giving him a small smile, “Please, um...have a seat.” She motioned to a chair in front of her desk.
“But you’re expecting…” Draco started, but Hermione shook her head at him.
“I so rarely get visitors here. I merely assumed you were Harry looking for an early lunch. You're not interrupting any plans.”
Draco silently nodded as he went to the chair and sat.
“May I get you anything to drink? Tea? Water?” Hermione offered politely. Draco simply shook his head as he allowed himself to look about Hermione’s small office. She waited patiently for him return his attention to her and when he was still eyeing her office furniture several minutes later she spoke again.
“Um…so was there something the S.P.E.W. can do for you today, Malfoy?”
Draco shook his head again as he casually inspected the framed articles she had hanging on her walls. “Not particularly.”
There was another awkward silence and Hermione bristled slightly at Draco’s insouciance.
“Then may I ask what you are doing here?”
"This office is terrible, Granger," Draco said, ignoring her question as he continued to look around, "it's too small. There's not even a window."
"I'm aware," Hermione replied edgily.
"I mean, I think my kitchen cabinets are larger than this. How can you stand working in here?"
Hermione frowned at him. "It works just fine for what I require,” she answered snappily, “Now if you have nothing more than critiques on my work space I think..."
"Work for me," Draco interrupted, finally turning his gaze to her. Hermione gawked at him a little.
"Excuse me?"
Draco leaned back in his chair and folded his hands over his stomach. "I'm offering you a new job," he said seriously. Hermione eyed him curiously before answering.
"I don't need a new job, thank you. I'm quite dedicated to this one and despite the 'terrible' working conditions I actually rather enjoy it."
"You can keep this dismal job too if you like," Draco replied with a half shrug.
"I don't understand," Hermione said with a huff, "You haven't seen or talked to me in five years but for a chance meeting two weeks ago - during which you informed me you'd prefer never to see me – and you now all of a sudden want me to come and work for you?"
"Six years," Draco said idly as he inspected a cuticle, "and yes."
"And what exactly is it you'd have me do?" Hermione asked, folding her arms across her chest.
"I need someone to show me how to do Muggle things," he answered.
Hermione fully gawked at him. She shook her head and laughed. "You have the wrong department, Malfoy. The Department of Education office on level two has Muggle Studies tutors available for hire. If you want..."
"I don't want some dumbshite Ministry tutor, Granger," Draco said, leaning forward again. "All they do is tell you about things. I want to do things. I want to experience them."
Hermione looked at him thoughtfully. "Why?"
"I have my reasons," he answered shortly.
"You could hire any Muggle-born to show you how..."
Draco shook his head. "No. It has to be you."
Hermione narrowed her eyes a bit. "Why?"
"Because I know that you are familiar with Muggle culture.”
“So are a lot of people. I’m not seeing a reason for me specifically to show you.”
Draco furrowed his brow a bit and pursed his lips. His grey eyes searched her face before he finally replied.
“I don’t trust anyone else to show me,” he said reluctantly. “You’ve had the honor of already seeing me at my worst, so I won't be embarrassed if I fail at something in front of you. And I need to be discrete. I know you’re good for a secret.”
“You think you know me that well?” Hermione challenged lightly. Draco picked at an invisible spot on his robes.
“In this regard. The Prophet never did find out about that little incident you were present for with Astoria, did they? Biggest gossip item since Potter got hitched and not a blurb to be found. Curious that.”
“It wasn’t my business to tell,” Hermione said quietly.
Draco nodded at her. “Precisely.”
Hermione studied him silently for a bit.
"What kind of Muggle things are you looking to experience?" she asked at last.
Draco shrugged. "Anything? Everything? Fun stuff. Important stuff. Stuff Muggles do. You tell me."
"How do you expect this to work if I say yes?" Hermione asked seriously.
"You come up with an activity for me to learn. You show me how to do it. I pay you money for teaching me. Simple."
"And you'll accept working around my current work schedule?"
Draco nodded. "I don't really have any other commitments. Whatever works for you, works for me."
Hermione twisted her lip as she looked at her desk in thought. "It'll be just you and me...doing random Muggle things…of my choosing…on my schedule?"
"And I'll pay you...as well as any other costs associated with the activities," Draco said with another nod.
“And you’re really serious about this?”
Draco gave her an unwavering stare. “As Dragon Pox.”
Hermione looked to be mulling the idea over before she glanced up at the clock on her wall. She picked up her wand from the desk and waved it. At once all of her paperwork was neatly filing itself into cabinets. When the flurry of rustling parchment and closing drawers ceased, she stood and straightened her robes.
Draco watched her from where he sat and cocked an eyebrow as she stowed her wand and grabbed a bag hanging from a hook on the wall. Hermione came around the desk and went to the door of her tiny office. She opened it and paused to look over her shoulder.
"Come on.”
Draco smirked and pushed himself up from the chair. "Where exactly is it that we're going?"
Hermione adjusted her bag over her arm. "To a bank," she said with a small smile.
"A bank?" Draco asked amused. Hermione nodded as they stepped out into the dim hall.
"A Muggle one. Muggles don't use Galleons. So if you’re going to be paying for all sorts of Muggle things, I think the first practical thing to teach you would be Muggle finances."
"So you're agreeing to the job, then?" Draco asked hopefully as he followed her down the hall.
“Merlin help me if I know why…but yes,” Hermione answered as they came up beside the reception desk. She glanced at the woman behind it. “Norma, please tell Harry, if he comes, that I had some errands I had to run and that I’m sorry I missed him.”
Norma gave a nod without looking up from her Witch Weekly.
“She’s pleasant,” Draco remarked as Hermione stepped in stride beside him out of the department. Hermione simply laughed as they turned the corner toward the lifts.
“Since we’ll already be doing some banking, you might want to stop by Gringotts before we start our lesson,” Draco said as he pulled an envelope from an inside pocket of his robes. He handed it to Hermione as they waited for a lift. “You’ll want to deposit that.”
Hermione took the envelope with a puzzled look. “What’s this?” she asked, turning the plain envelope over in her hand.
“Payment for services already rendered,” Draco answered as he watched the lift slow to a stop at their floor and the gates open. Hermione frowned at him, but tore open the envelope and pulled the thin sheet of parchment from inside as she stepped into the empty lift after Draco. She looked down at the parchment as the lift gates closed.
“Oh my god,” she gasped, clutching a hand to her chest and leaning against the lift wall as she read the payment voucher made out to her. She looked up at Draco with wide eyes. “A thousand Galleons?”
Draco nodded lazily as he leaned against the other wall. “For showing me how to use a trampoline. You were quite right about me enjoying it. I expect you to help me purchase one at some point.”
Hermione shook her head and waved the voucher at him to take back. “I am not accepting this,” she stated firmly.
“Is it not enough?” Draco asked with a concerned expression. “I can double it?”
“Wha…doub…double it?” Hermione spluttered in shock. “No! I’m not accepting because it’s too much. We were just having a bit of fun. You do not need to pay me for the trampoline thing.”
Draco shrugged. “Then consider it a thank you. I’m not taking it back.”
The lift lurched to a stop and Draco stepped out the moment the gates pulled open. He turned back to see Hermione still gaping at him from against the wall.
“Something the matter?” Draco asked lightly. Hermione shook her head slightly as she snapped herself from her stupor.
“No…ah…” she cleared her throat and stepped out of the lift. “The bank is only a few blocks from here,” she said as she came up beside him and nervously stuffed the voucher into her bag. “I hope you’re not opposed to walking there?”
“Not at all,” Draco said, casually stuffing his hands into his robe pockets. Hermione twisted her mouth as she watched him do so and made a hmming noise.
“What are you wearing under these fancy robes of yours?” she asked as they headed to the Floos. Draco raised an eyebrow and grinned.
“A bit forward aren’t we?”
“Oh, please,” Hermione huffed with a roll of her eyes, “I need to know if we have to get you changed before we go. Muggles are not accustomed to seeing people in wizards’ robes in the middle of May.”
“Are they ever accustomed to seeing them?” he asked with genuine curiosity.
“On Halloween perhaps,” Hermione answered with a shrug. “Now stop being a prat and show me what you’ve got on.”
Draco stopped just before the lines to the Floos and tugged off his slate grey robes.
“Happy?” he asked, grasping his robes in one hand as he held his arms out to his sides to show off the dark grey trousers and light grey dress shirt he was wearing.
Hermione simply tilted her head as she looked him over. “No tie?”
“I hate ties,” he said, wrinkling his nose.
Hermione shrugged. “Well, you’ll do. That’s a good color on you by the way.”
Draco’s mouth tugged up into a small smile. “Well…?” he asked expectantly as she went to join the short queue for the first Floo.
“Well, what?” Hermione asked turning back to him with a frown. Draco looked her very obviously up and down.
“What are you wearing under those fancy robes of yours?”
Hermione kept a straight face and simply pulled off her burgundy robes to reveal a plain black, knee-length pencil skirt and a white blouse. Draco pouted slightly at her lack of reaction to his question, but Hermione showed no notice of it as she turned back to the queue.
“No heels?” Draco asked as he eyed her simple black flats and stepped into line beside her.
“I hate heels,” she said with a playful lilt.
“That’s unfortunate,” he said just as they came up to the Floo for their turn. Hermione looked up at him.
“Why is that unfortunate?”
Draco grinned to himself, but didn’t answer as they were consumed with the green flames of the Floo that would bring them to the surface.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Hermione walked down the sidewalk alongside Draco as he read one of the pamphlets in his hands that he’d received from the bank.
“So… Muggles use money called Pounds that can be either coins or paper? But I’m going to get a plastic card? That I’m to use to buy things? And not the coins or paper money? Also the card is really yours? Because I have no…uh…credit history?” he said, face twisting in confusion as he continued to read. Hermione chuckled beside him.
“Well they use Pounds here. In the States they use Dollars, on the continent they mostly use Euros, the Japanese use Yen…”
“Stop,” Draco pleaded, “Just stop.” He rubbed at his forehead.
“And the credit card will be yours. It’ll have your name on it and everything. I merely co-signed,” Hermione added.
“But we used your address,” Draco frowned a little at the pamphlet.
“Muggle post is a lesson for another day,” Hermione said as they came up to the outside of the public restroom entrance of the Ministry. She tugged open her bag and then glanced around furtively before reaching in and pulling out Draco's long robes. She shook them out slightly and handed them to him.
"And when will our next lesson be?" Draco asked as he took his robes from her.
"When I receive your credit card, I'll owl it to you along with the date and time of our next activity," Hermione answered as she closed her bag. Draco pouted a little.
"But they said that could take seven to ten days.”
Hermione quirked an eyebrow at him. "A week between Muggle lessons is too long?"
Draco shrugged a little. "I don't know. I suppose not."
Hermione gave him a small smile. "I'll look over my current work commitments and try to come up with a reliable schedule for our activities."
Draco merely nodded as he stuffed his banking pamphlets into a pocket of his robes.
"Well...I'd best get back. I've been away for longer than I anticipated already," Hermione said a tad rushed as she inched closer to the building's entrance, "Do you need to come back down to the Ministry for anything?"
"No. I think I'll head home..." he paused and looked thoughtfully at the ground. "There's really nothing that we could do for free while we wait for the card?"
Hermione lowered the hand she had on the building door. "There are plenty of things we can do for free. I just didn't want to overwhelm you."
"This money-card business was a bit much," Draco confessed with a small chuckle. "But I would like to learn as much as possible."
"I'll think of something and let you know," Hermione offered at last. Draco nodded and tipped an invisible hat to her.
"Thanks, Granger."
Hermione shook her head at him, but smiled. "Sure. Thank you for the interesting day, Malfoy." With that, she pushed open the door and disappeared into the building beyond.
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Muggle Things