Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Leave A Tender Moment Alone	By : Spurge_Laurel Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female Views: 5908 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and I make no money from this hobby.

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Myrrdin Wyllt looked upon the ravaged landscape, seeing not a battlefield but a graveyard. So many lives lost, so much suffering borne, and for what? The pride and vanity of a single woman. His greatest mistake. The sound of bones cracking beside him made the wizened old wizard look towards his companion just in time to witness him lower his arms from a full body stretch, seemingly fully reinvigorated.

It was a young man, someone who had just recently become an acquaintance of the aforementioned royal wizard. How such a powerful caster could have remained hidden from the court of Camelot for so long was unknown to Myrrdin, but he was just glad that the black haired youth had joined him in repelling le Fay’s dark host. Such bravery in defense of king and country deserved a reward, but when Myrddin approached the subject, the stranger who had introduced himself as Harry Potter simply waved him off.

“There’s really no need for something like that,” he said with a shrug, “I didn’t help because I wanted anything. It was just the right thing to do.”

“Regardless,” Myrrdin tried to convince him, “without your intervention, the battle would have assuredly been lost! I have never known a wizard with a keener mind for warfare. There must be something you would like? Ask for anything within my power, and I’ll see it done. My friend Arthur wouldn’t accept your help for free, no matter what you say.” Humility was all well and good, but it was only natural for a powerful wizard to take pride in his spellcasting.

“Well, if you could help me get back home to my wife, that would be grand! She’s probably right mad at me right now, so the sooner I get back the better.”

“That shouldn’t be too difficult. Where did you say you were from, again?”

“Something like a millenia and a half in the future.”

“Very well, let us just—Pardon, did you just say a millenia and a half into the future?!”

“I know, it’s amazing, right? Daphne is so clever, nobody else would have been able to make a TARDIS.”

Myrrdin was now concerned. Very concerned. “You mean to tell me that you travelled back in time to get here? Haven’t you ever been warned about what happens to wizards who meddle with time?!”

“Well, it’s not like I meant to come here in particular, I was just testing it out. And besides,” the clearly insane time traveller waved aside his concerns, “When we were thirteen my friend Hermione was given a time turner by our teachers so she could take all the classes. We used it to save a hippogriff and nothing bad happened. I even gave myself a high five after teaming up with future—or was it past?—me to repel some dementors.”

The court wizard dragged a hand down his face. This was too much for him to deal with. Especially right after facing Morgan. “If you’re got a device with which to travel through time, pray tell, what do you need my help for?”

For the first time since meeting this strange young wizard, Myrrdin watched him duck his head out of embarrassment. He rubbed the back of his head, messing up his already messy crow’s nest. “Ha ha, yeah, about that. . . it’s kind of unfinished?”

Deadpan stare. “What do you mean, unfinished?”

“It, er, only goes back.”

Myrrdin sighed. This was going to be an ordeal. “You said your wife will be mad if you don’t show up soon?”

“Oh, yes! Daphne can be a right terror when she gets in a tiff. She’s bloody brilliant, it can be hard to know exactly what she’s thinking, and you didn’t hear this from me, but sometimes when she looks at me I swear she’s plotting out ways to kill me and hide the body.

“Of course, I know exactly how to calm her down. A cup of tea, a comfortable cushion, a warm cuddle. And being a Parselmouth comes in handy when I spread her legs and take of her knickers. You need to be looking at a snake to speak Parseltongue, but I just pretend my penis is one. It’s worth the weirdness because when I put my tongue on her clit, the magic inherent in the language just drives her crazy and she—”

“Okay!” Myrrdin quickly stopped this shameless man before he could go any further. For the love of magic, did he not hear what was coming out of his mouth? “She sounds like a lovely lady. We best get to work on getting you back to her.”

The last thing Camelot needed was this man’s wife making another one of these tardises to reunite with her husband, and then the two of them spreading their debauchery among the common folk.
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Leave A Tender Moment Alone