Struggling Through New Beginnings | By : HarryGinny4eva Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 31233 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1 |
Disclaimer: Spoilers - I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Disclaimer: Spoilers - I do
not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from
the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 21
Pansy sighed, “I never said I didn’t like him,
Ginny. I just said that I didn’t think he and I were right for each other. It’s
not like he’s no good with anyone.”
“But, Hermione?!” Ginny shook her head. “What were you
thinking trying to set them up? I can’t believe she didn’t jinx you to bits!”
Pansy shook her head, “Well, I thought she would, too, but um, she, well, when
we talked, uh…”
Ginny just looked at her, “Spit it out, Pansy.”
“Well, she said she might be interested in him, too,” Pansy confessed. The look
on Ginny’s face made her rush to add, “But, I don’t know if I’m supposed to say
anything to anyone, so you can’t tell her I told you, okay? I don’t want her
even more upset with me. Let her tell you in her own time please.”
Ginny nodded mutely, but looked across the room to Hermione’s bent head. The
very idea that her intelligent friend would even think of falling for the one
person who had hurt so many people with his actions and words, and Hermione
specifically, so often, boggled her mind.
“There can’t be that much change in the world,” she muttered to herself. “Is
she crazy?”
Pansy laughed a little, “Well, I think we’re all feeling a little crazy right
now, don’t you? Look at me? In only two days I have completely given up on my
parents’ dreams for me, set my sights on a man who doesn’t know I exist, who
barely even notices me, actually, and made friends with the two most unlikely
witches in the whole school. And, you…you’ve broken up with Harry and…”
“What? No, I didn’t!” Ginny interrupted. “I didn’t!”
Pansy nodded, “Okay, okay. It’s just, well, everyone’s
talking about some fight you two had, and then all day you’ve been really
distant from one another and all, so I just guessed that you…”
“Well, it’s not true! We did not break up,” Ginny hissed. “And, people should
mind their own business! We had a fight, that’s all.”
Pansy tried to calm her down, “Hey, I get it. I’m sorry. It’s okay. Relax,
Ginny. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m so sorry.”
Ginny took a deep breath and then another as she gripped the edge of the table.
Then she looked at Pansy, “I’m okay. And, stop apologizing. It’s annoying!”
When Pansy put her hands in her lap and looked down, Ginny felt bad for
snapping at her, “Look, I’m just more than a little stressed, you know. It’s
been a crazy few days. Hell, a crazy year. And, I have all this Head Girl stuff
I have to do and I have to do it with Blaise the Butthead! And, you know what?
It’s not all me! It’s a fair bit of pressure being his girlfriend sometimes.
He’s always hovering. I can barely excuse myself to go the loo
without him watching me and asking if I’m okay. I just need some space is all. That’s all. I wasn’t breaking up with him. I just want
him to stop being so damn protective all the time. I can take care of myself; I
did for almost a year! Why can’t he see that?”
Pansy lifted her eyes to Ginny’s and said softly, “Because he loves you,” as if
that was the answer to all of life’s ills.
Ginny shook her head, “Love doesn’t solve everything, Pansy.”
“I know,” Pansy said defensively but with a shrug, “but, at least you have
someone you know cares about you more than anything. Even with all his savior
issues, isn’t that worth something?”
“Yeah,” Ginny agreed with a glance over at Harry and Theo’s bent heads. She
wondered what they were whispering to each other, but turned back to Pansy,
“Yeah, it is. I guess I have to just figure out how to be me with him. I’ve
never really done that, you know?”
“No, I don’t,” Pansy shook her head. “What do you mean?”
Ginny sat back a little and sighed, “I’ve loved that man, in one way or
another, since I was ten years old. I grew up doing everything in my power to
make him see me, I made myself into a person he would want, would be proud to
have at his side. But, along the way I kind of forgot to figure out who I
really was, I guess. It’s always been about Harry. How to get him, how to keep
him, how to get him back after he left last year; it’s never really been about
me. Now, with nothing to keep us apart, and nothing for him to think about, but
me, I guess I worry that once I do figure out who I am, he won’t like the
person I’ve become.”
Pansy sat quietly for a moment before she nodded, “So you’ve stamped down all
that’s really you and have been trying to be the person you think he wants you
to be. No wonder it’s finally making you crazy.”
Ginny smiled at Pansy’s intuition, “Yeah, something like that.”
xxxxx
Ron never claimed to be the sharpest quill in the
set, but he had relatively good intuition. Once he put together all that had
happened over the past couple of days, he came to the conclusion that Hermione
might actually be interested in the pasty-faced git
across from him. She had been distracted and argumentative, gnawing on her lip
like she was starving, and she couldn’t seem to keep still. He’d suspected that
her snapping at him had meant that she had a lot on her mind and now he knew
what it was.
Draco Malfoy.
Ron scowled at the thought and watched Draco steal another glance over at
Hermione’s table. Part of him wanted to jump across the table and make the man
eat his own eyeballs. But, the mature part of him held back for one reason
only. If Hermione was actually interested in the ass, was it his place to stand
in her way? He knew Draco wasn’t a physical threat to anyone any more, but he
was pretty sure no one really knew how vulnerable and insecure Hermione could
be.
He thought back on how long it had taken him to get her, and wondered how much
had been his hesitance and how much had been her reluctance to put herself out
there to be hurt. And, whether or not Malfoy meant to do it or not, planned to
do it or not, if Hermione liked him, he had the power to hurt her. And, that
was something Ron wouldn’t let happen. Even if they were no longer together, he
loved her and wanted her happy. If she wanted Malfoy for real, then he would
stay out of it, but he would keep an eye on things just in case. If she wasn’t
interested, then he would happily take pleasure in rubbing it in the man’s face
for the rest of the year.
Ron wondered what Harry would say when he found out and looked across the room
to see Harry and Theo in deep discussion. As Ron watched he saw Harry look at
Draco and then over at Hermione and knew it wouldn’t be long before he would
find out. Harry looked incredulous, murderous, and then shocked in quick
succession before he fell back in his chair and said an, “Oh shit,” that Ron
could read quite clearly from his seat.
Ron laughed to himself as he nodded in agreement and went back to staring at
Draco. He didn’t expect those icy eyes to be looking back at him.
Neither had spoken to the other since Draco’s confession the night before. Now,
as students started drifting away from the table on their way to classes, Ron
felt he should make himself clear.
“I’m willing to acknowledge that things, circumstances, and even people change,
Malfoy, but, listen up. I don’t personally care what you think you feel or how
different you think you now are. I don’t feel sorry for you or your family. You
all got what you deserved, nothing more, nothing less.
It’s not even personal, as I simply don’t care enough about you to even hate
you anymore. I don’t even pity you. You’re a non-entity, really. But, she is
someone I do care for deeply. And, while who she chooses to be with is her
choice, one that I will learn to live with no matter who it is, I give you this
one warning. If you hurt her, if you try to hurt her, if you even think of
hurting her, I will crush you. There will be nowhere for you to run, nowhere to
hide. I will spend the rest of my days finding ways to make her pain yours
ten-fold. Do we understand each other?”
Draco stared back at the red-haired man across from him in silence for a long
moment. He had been shocked at first to hear Ron addressing him directly, but
then was floored by what was said. He had never considered “The Weasel” to be much
of a threat, as his hot headed actions and inability to keep his mouth shut
normally got him in more trouble than Draco could have ever dreamt up for him.
But, sitting across from the deadly serious man, he was forced to reevaluate
Ron Weasley. Gone was the rash young boy he had always known; in his place sat
a man with complete confidence in himself and his beliefs. For the first time
ever, Draco took a threat from the other man seriously.
But, he was still Draco Malfoy and he was not about to let Ron know he had
gotten to him. He plastered a bland look on his face and answered in a soft,
low voice, “Piss off, Weasel! You don’t scare me.”
Ron stood as Draco did and as he rounded the table Ron grabbed his arm and
pulled him close. His voice was a bare whisper as he spat confidently, “Your
eyes said differently, Ferret! And, though you may not believe it, I am more
than capable of backing up my words. So, watch yourself.”
Draco refused to let Ron see how much his words affected him and pulled his arm
roughly away, “Don’t touch me! And, stay out of my business!”
Before Ron could retort Draco swept passed him and out of the doors. Ron huffed
and clenched his hands into fists. He almost swung around and punched the
person who dared touch his shoulder before he realized who it was.
“Oh, sorry, Harry.”
“S’okay,” Harry answered. “Figured it out, too, huh?”
Ron didn’t need to ask what and just nodded as he angrily gathered his
belongings and the two headed to class.
Each stayed lost in his own thoughts on the turn of events and didn’t speak as
Harry walked with Ron to his Muggle Studies class. When they reached the door,
the new professor, Peyton Mills, was already ushering people into the room. Ron
cast an evil glance at the back of Malfoy’s head and
then turned to Harry.
“Meet you back in the common room after?”
Harry nodded and smiled a bit, “Yeah, and try not to hex him in front of
witnesses, okay?”
“No problem,” Ron laughed with him. “There’s no magic allowed in this class,
remember?”
Harry smiled at the thought of the entire class of witches and wizards learning
to do things without magic and laughed, “I can’t wait to hear all about this
class. You have to remember to take extra notes on the Slytherins reactions,
okay?”
“Will do,” Ron nodded. “I better get going. See you after.” After one last wave
at Harry, Ron entered the room.
He noticed that everyone was still standing and looked to the new professor to
find out what was going on.
She smiled at the room as she began to walk around the classroom, “Hello,
everyone. My name is Professor Peyton Mills. I am a fully qualified and trained
witch, although I grew up in Australia and did my schooling there. I sat and
passed my O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s. We don’t have magical schools like Hogwarts
there. Our magic is homeschooled, but our book learning is done in regular
schools along with everyone else. As such, school and magic were separated and
played no part in who we befriended or the schooling we received. Unlike here
in England, there wasn’t a lot of emphasis on people’s blood status, although I
assure you, we found plenty of other reasons to not like one another, as
children are want to do. I say all this to explain how I am qualified to teach
this class.”
She paused momentarily to wave her wand at the blackboard and they saw a
seating chart appear on it.
Then she looked back at them and continued, “Now, as is done in most classes
back home, you will sit in your assigned seats unless you are told to do
differently. They are alphabetically assigned, so there is no favoritism or
house judgment. Now, if you will all take your seats?”
When everyone was seated she asked, “Before we begin our introductions, are
there any questions?”
Parvati raised her hand and was granted permission to speak, “I thought we couldn’t
use magic in here?”
“You can’t, but I can,” Professor Mills laughed not unkindly. “Your wands were
deactivated, so to speak, the moment you crossed the threshold of the room.
But, I promise you I will not use it often, as I want you to really experience
a regular classroom.”
Greg timidly raised his hand and when she called on him he turned a bit red in
embarrassment. “Um, Professor? Why do you keep saying
regular school? Are you saying we’re not normal?”
The smile on her face softened as she shook her head, “Oh no! Absolutely not. I didn’t mean to offend any of you. It’s habit more than anything, I guess. I mean, think about
it, ninety-five percent of the world goes to school
and does the same things as we are going to do. But, here, and at Beauxbaton and a few other places, you all never get to see
any of that. To you this is normal, but to me, what I know is normal. Does that
make sense?”
Several students nodded, but the others continued to stare at her blankly, so
she tried a different tactic.
“Okay, how about this? How many of you were homeschooled before coming here?”
When every hand raised she nodded and continued, “And, how many of you knew
non-magical people before you came to school?” Most hands dropped, and she
asked, “And, how many of you ever wondered why it was that you weren’t made
privy to the happenings and actions of over ninety percent of the population of
this planet?”
No one raised their hands, but several people shifted nervously. She didn’t
want to scare them, but she wanted to make them understand. She moved to her
desk and leaned back on it.
“In this class, you will learn about all those things you’ve missed. You will
get to decide what you like about the whole world around you, not just the
magical one. You will be able to feel comfortable going anywhere in the world
and knowing you understand those around you. You may not have shared those
experiences before, but my hope is that when you are done this year, you will
be able to go out there into the world and choose to be whoever you want to be,
whether it be magical or non. I hope to open up a
whole new world for you; one with endless opportunities, brand new options, and
new chances. You never know. One of you may be an upcoming Minister of Magic or
English Prime Minister. You could be a star quidditch player or a star footy
player. You could date, fall in love with and marry anyone, magical or muggle.
You will no longer be limited to the people, places and events you know now. My
hope is that by the end of the year, you will be free to decide who you are, to
make your own choices.”
All of the students stared up at her in awe. She had made it sound plausible,
possible, even attainable. She had made them want it.
Peyton Mills hid her tiny grin of triumph and tucked her head to take
attendance.
xxxxx
Nearly two hours later Hermione stood outside of
the door and grinned to herself as she heard the teacher’s homework assignment.
Each student was to figure out how to send off for a subscription to one muggle
newspaper and one muggle magazine. They were to present their completed
applications at the next class along with an explanation of what their next
steps should be. Their subscriptions were to start arriving by the next week. She
knew the easiest way to do it, as it had been the way she and her parents had
sent mail during her earlier years at Hogwarts, but Hermione laughed out loud
at the thought of Ron and Ginny trying to figure out the muggle post at Hogsmeade.
Her laugh was interrupted by the classroom door opening and the students pouring
out of the room. Hermione was happy to note that most looked excited about the
class. She heard exclamations about how great their new professor was and how
much fun the class would be, and part of her wondered if she could get permission
to at least audit the class. But, before a plan to do so could completely form
in her head, she found herself staring up at Draco Malfoy. She hadn’t even
noticed him come out of the room, and most certainly hadn’t seen him come to
stand in front of her.
She felt her heart lurch and her stomach flutter as
her eyes travelled up his long, lean body, taking note despite herself of how
good he looked. When she finally reached his face she had to curl her hand into
a fist at her side to stop herself from reaching up to brush his hair out of
his eyes. Eyes that held her mesmerized for a long quiet
moment. In them she read interest that made her want to blush, question
that made her want to answer yes to
whatever he asked, and something else she couldn’t quite decipher, but its heat
made her flush a bit.
“Malfoy?” she asked when he just stood there staring at her, with his head
tilted slightly in confusion.
“Is it your shampoo or perfume?” he finally asked his voice soft in inquiry.
She blinked up at him for a second before she found her tongue, “I’m sorry.
What?”
“That scent, strawberries, vanilla and something else, what is it?” he asked as
his eyes moved around her face and hair.
“H…herbs,” she finally stuttered. “And, I guess it’s my shampoo. Why?”
He looked down into her eyes when he heard her voice turn defensive on the last
question. He allowed a small smile and said softly, “Because it’s stuck in my
head, Granger. And, since I can’t seem to get rid of it, I thought I should at
least know what it is.”
“Oh,” she murmured. Then she looked very confused as she stared up at him, “Why
is it stuck in your head?”
He shrugged and his cheeks reddened just a little as he said with a grin, “I
guess because you are.”
Before she could answer he turned and walked away from her. She followed him
with her eyes until he was gone from the hall, chiding herself the entire time
for wishing he wasn’t wearing robes that covered his backside. Then she
reminded herself to breathe and turned back to see Ron, Ginny, Theo, Parvati,
Greg and Millicent all staring at her. She blushed a
brilliant shade of red as she realized what they must have looked like with
Draco leaning into her and her against the wall looking up at him.
“Well, maybe I won’t have to say something to him after all,” Theo mumbled.
Then he turned to Parvati, “Shall we go get to work on our assignment?”
She nodded at him and took his offered hand. As they walked by Hermione,
Parvati leaned in and whispered, “Tonight, we have your first hair and makeup
lesson!”
She didn’t get to answer before they swept passed her and down the hall. Greg
mumbled something about needing to get a nap and took off rather quickly,
refusing to meet Hermione’s eyes as he went by her. Millicent hurried after him
and Hermione saw her cuff him on the arm as they walked away. She felt badly
about possibly hurting Greg’s feelings, but when she turned back to Pansy, Ron
and Ginny, she forgot all about it.
“Uh, hi guys,” she ventured nervously. Pansy smiled knowingly at her, Ginny
looked to be in a bit of shock, and Ron looked both ticked and resigned.
“Hi yourself,” Pansy chirped.
“What exactly was that?” Ginny asked without preamble.
Ron jutted out his chin as he asked, “Was he threatening you?”
“No,” she answered Ron’s question with a shake of her head. “He was just…he…he
asked about my shampoo,” she finished lamely.
“What?” Pansy asked as Ginny said, “Huh?!” Ron’s “What for?” was louder than
both of the women’s voices.
Hermione shook her head and looked once again down the empty hall, “I don’t
know. But, that’s what he asked me about.”
She looked back at their confused faces and laughed as they mirrored her own
feelings. She shrugged and didn’t know what else to say. She hadn’t revealed
her feelings to Ginny or Ron yet, and she wasn’t quite sure how to say whatever
it was she was going to say to explain it. Especially when she didn’t really
know what was going on herself.
xxxxx
Author’s Responses: I thank each and
every person who is reading this story. And, I doubly thank those that have
taken the time to tell me what they think of it. And, for those that have
chosen the story or me as a favorite, I can’t thank you enough!
Mrs.DracoMalfoy: I hope this taste
of them was a good enough start for you. :-) Thank you!
margaritama: Blaise and his
feelings on Hermione, well, denial…ain’t just a river
in Egypt. ha ha ha And, yes, he has a long way to go, but he, too, will get
there. I don’t see him as a bitter guy five years from now, if that helps. ;-) So,
what did you think of Draco finally coming “out of his head”? Ron is kind of focused
on things right now, but that’s because of all the changes. Plus, there has
been no real reason for him to notice or even think about Pansy, yet.
Losername: You just got your
first taste. Was it okay?
kazfeist: Well, sometimes I
like to please. ha ha ha
bLondpierogi: Thank you!
Alexiel Almasy: Thank you very,
very much. Your words meant a lot to me. I hope you love the rest of the story,
too.
Dreamweaver: Take your time and
get settled. No need to rush. Plus, you do have some writing to do… hint hint hint ;-) Thanks, hon!
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