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The Headmaster's Wife	By : Mrs_HH Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 96743 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 23
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 19
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Past pains

Pius Thicknesse was sat in one of the private rooms at The Leaky Cauldron unable to stop laughing at the wizard sat with him. Not so long ago no one could have laughed at this wizard in such a way. His serious and calculating nature, as well as his reputation for being formidably ruthless, were legend. But that was the mask he had to wear...allegedly. It would be wrong to think that he was not capable of being all of these things still but since the end of the war and the reintroduction of hope into his life, The Dark Saviour had somewhat mellowed. Although only a fool would ever try to underestimate him.

"It's not funny, Pius," Severus said trying not to laugh himself at the situation, which he still couldn't believe he found himself in.

"Oh come on. It goes with the territory of falling for a younger witch, Severus. You can't drag her round with us boring old gits all the time. Although why don't we go out for dinner in a few weeks?" Pius asked as the idea suddenly sprang into his head.

Then he continued, "It's obviously easier for her to blend in with us than it is for you to blend in with her friends but you've got to make the effort; even if you'll always be seen as the big, bad wolf," Pius said as he took a gulp of wine and then looked at the bottle approvingly. Severus always picked excellent wine.

"Well you might be an old git but I'm younger than you and I think you'll find they referred to me as a bat," Severus said arching his eyebrows knowingly.

Pius laughed even more and then calming slightly gave Severus a puzzled look. "Why were you eating here if you are going round for dinner?"

"I have been warned that Miss Weasley is prone to serving inedible delights which surprises me as she is more than adequate in potions and the ability to cook is akin to that of brewing," Severus drawled.

Pius smirked, "I suppose to other teachers your 'more than adequate' actually means 'very good'. Do you ever tell any of your students that they are good at what they do? Or are they just more than adequate?"

"I cannot speak for anyone else and I can only apologise for having such exacting standards," Severus said impassively. "Very few truly understand the nuances of potions. Hermione has shown the most promise for years and she still has much to learn. But she will be brilliant by the time I've finished with her"

"Are we still talking about potion making here or are we talking about something else?" Pius sniggered. He was desperate to find out about his friend's newfound sex life.

Severus glared at him. "Potions and if you think I will discuss anything else with you I would strongly advise you to forget it"

"As you wish," Pius said changing tack. "Are you?"

"What?" Severus snapped. Pius had the most annoying, yet surprisingly effective interrogation technique. You don't get to be Head of Magical Law Enforcement without either being clever or a brute. And as Pius had no stomach for violence, he favoured the creative approach.

Pius leaned forward in his chair. "I think you must be," he stated calmly.

Severus rolled his eyes before a wicked grin flashed across his face, "I've told you before stop trying to seduce me"

"Oh please. Shut up...I'm not Blondie," Pius snarked.

Severus's eyes widened as he arched an eyebrow. "Blondie? Is that what you're calling Lucius these days?"

"My secretary called him it once and it stuck," Pius said with a light chuckle.

"I dread to think what she calls me" Severus huffed taking another mouthful of wine.

"I can assure you she only refers to you as The Snarky Bastard," Pius smirked.

Severus sighed deeply, "Thank Merlin. I can live with that. The last thing I need is some witch at the ministry giving me a fluffy pet name because if Hermione ever got wind of it, she'd tease me with it for the rest of eternity"

Pius was always amused by Severus' general snarkiness but he still didn't have an answer. "Anyway getting back to my original line of questioning; are you soul mates as you suspected?"

Severus looked at him through guarded eyes. He swallowed and sighed before allowing a slight smile to grace the corner of his mouth, "Yes"

"Well, from what I've heard, soul bonded sex is supposed to be pretty mind-blowing," Pius said raising his eyebrows knowingly.

Severus annoyingly remained silent.

"Oh come on Severus. Don't be shy. You can tell me," the older wizard teased.

"I could but it would only give you another opportunity to drool over my girlfriend," Severus snipped frostily but then said quietly, "and yet who am I to disagree with those who have made such knowledge heard?"

Pius nearly growled in frustration. He really needed to get laid. "Oh you lucky bastard!"

"Indeed I am," Severus smirked into his wine glass.

And now Lucius' name had been mentioned the two wizards discussed his disappearing act. They agreed the most plausible explanation was that Lucius had found himself a new witch or wizard. The last thing Lucius needed was to attract the attention of the ministry so they doubted he was engaging in anything too illicit as that would likely see him returned to Azkaban. After all he'd only been cleared last time by the skin of his teeth. And Lucius was not a stupid man and he valued his freedom highly. Severus just hoped he valued his son more.

"Well, if he has a new plaything, demanding he take them to Paris, I say good luck to him," Pius chuckled as he refilled their wine glasses.

"So would I but bearing in mind I'm his best friend, and he usually brags when he's snagged a new distraction, I would've at least hoped he could have confided in me. She could be married of course," Severus suggested.

"Maybe. Anyway all will become clear no doubt. Lucius has always been able to look after himself. Actually Severus, on a potentially related subject, may I seek your advice?" Pius asked looking quite reticent.

Severus narrowed his eyes and considered Pius carefully. "Go on," he drawled.

Pius cleared his throat. "We all know how you felt about Lily," he said as Severus rolled his eyes and growled. "No hear me out Severus. I know you didn't really have any meaningful relationships between her and Hermione. So did you feel you were betraying Lily's memory when you started seeing Hermione?"

Pius looked deep into his wine glass. He wasn't sure if Severus was going to answer him as he'd gone quiet, turning his own glass around by the stem, deep in thought. But suddenly he said in a calm, steady voice, "No. Maybe. I don't know but not a day went by when I didn't think about her. But I was guilt ridden. I betrayed her long before I started seeing Hermione. Are you saying you want to move on from your late wife?" Severus asked him carefully.

"I miss her more than anything. I think about her every day. When she was killed I didn't think I could carry on. He killed her so that he could break me. They'd tried to Imperio me before and failed. They killed her and I crumpled." Pius pinched the bridge of his nose to stem his tears.

"It still took four of them, Yaxley included," Severus offered, trying rather inadequately in his own opinion, to make Pius feel better about himself.

"All that time I was being controlled...," Pius shook his head trying to take in once again what he had done. "My head was so muddled. I received my orders and I couldn't fight them; everything was a blur."

He hung his head and almost whispered, "Oh gods the things I said and ordered. And I knew she wasn't there but I couldn't work out why. It was only when I was released from the curse that it all came back to me and I spent weeks trying to work out the best way to join her. Does that make me sound pathetic?"

Severus swirled the wine round in his glass. "Not at all. That's how I felt after Lily. When I saw her that night I didn't see Lily Potter. I saw my Lily; the 10 year old girl who ran home with me during a thunderstorm and give me a peck on the cheek before running home. The first girl I ever kissed. The first girl who...," his voice trailed off.

Severus closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I looked at her and prayed my next breath would be my last. And every night I went to sleep praying I wouldn't wake up. Drink didn't help; drugs didn't help; women didn't help. And honestly I don't know what kept me going."

"Do you think your soul bond got you through it?" Pius ventured. "Not that I think I'm one of the fortunate ones to have a soul mate of course. Although when you see Arthur sometimes you wonder if having a soul mate is all it's cracked up to be," Pius grimaced at the thought of Molly in full bluster.

Severus chuckled knowing that he would have to face that bluster sooner rather than later when Hermione told Molly and Arthur about their relationship. But then he pressed his lips together and with a furrowed brow said, "I don't know if the bond kept me going. Something certainly kept me from destroying myself and Merlin knows I tried,” he chuckled mirthlessly. “All I know is, when I tell Hermione 'it's always been you', I mean every word of it."

"Call The Daily Prophet! The Dark Saviour's in love," Pius laughed incredulously.

"I certainly am," Severus smirked, "but I would say if you are thinking about moving on then it is time to do so. And ask yourself how she would feel if she thought your life was on hold. Would she want you sitting around getting drunk with two miserable bastards on a regular basis and then going home to an empty house?"

Pius contemplated his answer before saying "No. In fact I believe she would have her boot up my arse."

"Then you need to find yourself a witch," Severus said almost cheerily.

Pius sighed deeply "Easier said than done. Do you know any single witches?"

"I'm sure Lucius does," Severus chuckled. "Most of the witches I know are either taken, too young or haven't a brain worthy enough of you my friend," he grinned.

"Don't really care about a brain...a pulse will do," Pius said actually realising he really did need to get laid. "Do you mind me asking...how old is Hermione?"

"Officially 19 on Saturday but she's actually 20 due to Albus and his magical time turner tour," Severus said rolling his eyes.

"How...why in the name of Circe did he sanction that?" Pius asked amazed at Dumbledore's recklessness.

Severus huffed. "Because she was, quite rightly, deemed an exceptional student and wanted to take more subjects than there were hours in the day. She was 14 at the time so of course she was tempted to overuse it. I know I would have done.”

His voice was full of disdain for the whole episode. The more he thought about it the angrier he got. What if she'd been sent too far back? What if she'd died? His only consolation was that she was safe and the time turner had been destroyed.

"So that is why the soul bond initiated fully in her fourth year because she had in fact reached 16."

Pius arched his eyebrows, "And you managed to keep your hands off until just recently? You really are the master of self control aren't you?"

Severus sighed, "I struggled at times and not just because of the moral an ethical implications but more importantly I had to protect her from him. Imagine his delight if I was not only in love with another Muggleborn but she also happened to be Harry Potter's best friend.

“There were a couple of times I nearly lost control and one resulted in me performing a mind lock. And that in itself put a stop to any feelings for a while at least," Severus said taking another mouthful of wine.

"And you're making up for lost time now are you?" Pius smirked, his eyes keenly observing his friend's reaction.

Severus didn't answer but couldn't help the small grin that graced his lips as he raised his eyebrows in acknowledgment that it was exactly what he was doing.

He drained drained his glass, looked at the clock and realised he needed to leave soon or else he would have a very unhappy witch on his hands. "Well Thickie, time for me to enter the lion's den"

Pius looked bemused. "The lion's den?"

"A Slytherin amongst three Gryffindors; I am, as you can tell, overcome with joy," Severus drawled.

"Well my friend if anyone can survive it, you can," Pius said slapping Severus on the shoulder. "I'll make sure the draft for the enforcement protocol is ready by the end of the week. I do like the ideas Hermione has added. Is she vying for one of the new deputy head of house roles?"

"Maybe one day," Severus said and then sighed deeply. "She is still insisting on taking her NEWTS whilst she teaches and does her apprenticeship. Plus, and I don't know if she has thought about this, she will have to accompany me to all sorts of tedious events. Deputy head of house would be too much work for her right now. Although she did say she wouldn't mind taking on one of the pastoral roles"

"They sound really interesting," Pius said intrigued by Severus' new ideas.

"The war affected every single student at the school; from the muggle-borns who couldn't return to those who actually fought. Even some of our new intake will have been affected. Many lost friends or even family members. Alas there will be far too many thestral sightings now.

“So I wanted some of the younger professors, together with some of the 7th and 8th years, who were intimately involved in the war, to act almost as counsellors. Rather than a student bottling up their emotions...and I know the dangers of brooding better than most...they will have a number of avenues to discuss how they feel.

“They might not want to speak to me or another senior member of staff but they may feel someone younger is more approachable. It will also link in nicely with the enforcement protocol. I don't want any of my students to suffer more than they have to."

"You really are determined to do everything you can to make sure this kind of thing never happens again aren't you?" Pius said shaking his head, not knowing if he admired Severus for what he was trying to achieve or if he thought he mad for even trying it.

"I don't want anyone to go through what I did and I know I can't stop a war Pius, but I can try and make sure that the roots of any potential trouble aren't put down in my school," Severus said with a calm authority that Pius had to admire.

"You should be Minister of Magic, my friend," Pius said laughing.

"No thank you. I know someone who had that role and he wasn't enamoured of it," Severus snarked.

Pius chuckled ruefully as Severus continued. "I have enough headaches trying to run the school. Running the whole of wizarding Britain would kill me."

"And we wouldn't want to risk losing you again. Plus Hermione would never forgive us," Pius laughed and then in a more serious tone said, "I'll be in touch about Hermione's parents. My contact in Australia has already narrowed down the possibilities but he did ask if there was any way to get a wand trace from Hermione?"

"The wand she had when she cast the spell was taken by snatchers," Severus drawled distractedly. He looked at the clock again. He was going to late but this was rather important.

Sorry darling I'm going to be slightly late. And no I'm not drunk. Pius is too scared of you to let that happen again, Severus thought to Hermione chuckling.

And he was genuinely sorry. For Hermione's sake he was determined to make the effort tonight.

Hermione laughed softly and thought back, It's alright love...we've had to do a rescue job on dinner so we're a bit behind anyway. I hope you haven't eaten too much!

Severus thought incredulously, How did you...? but Hermione interrupted him.

I know you! I've got a sauce to rescue...see you soon, he heard her giggling in his head.

Tuning back into the conversation he heard Pius say, "Probably just as well. No wand. No Priori Incantatem. We can't be too careful these days...we might not be the bad guys anymore but we've still got our fair share of enemies on both sides who will look for any reason to send us all down," Pius said seriously.

Severus had the feeling Pius was hiding something. He tried Legilimency but Pius' wards were impeccable. Pius just smirked as he blocked him.

"Sorry old habits die hard, my friend," Severus admitted sheepishly.

"I can't blame you for trying. However we cannot dwell on such matters. The information you have already managed to acquire from her should be sufficient. The wand trace would have just sped things up slightly. But as long as they are willing, we should have her parents with you by Christmas. I will personally go and bring them back."

"I would like to accompany you," Severus said. "I somehow think my future in-laws should know exactly what kind of danger they were in for her to resort to such measures. And I am possibly the best person to tell them."

"Then I better come up with a cover story for you so Hermione doesn't get suspicious," Pius said smirking.

"If you would," Severus said as he started walking towards the door.

"Oh and before you go babysitting, I managed to procure some more robes for the ball by the way," Pius said knowingly.

Severus growled at the babysitting comment and said urgently, realising he had to leave now, "As soon as you hear anything owl me and and as always, I am thrilled to hear your sartorial news."

And with a familiar swish of robes, Severus left the room repeating his silent mantra for the evening...try and be nice.

Severus stood before the familiar frontage of Grimmauld Place. Previously he would have just walked straight in but as this was now Potter's home he did the polite thing and knocked.

He could hear an excited Ginny Weasley running for the door. She paused to compose herself but he could almost hear her internal monologue. Suddenly the door opened and Ginny's well rehearsed greeting failed as she took in the sight of Severus Snape stood on the doorstep.

"Good evening, Ginerva," Severus said silkily.

Oh gods his voice...Hermione is such a lucky bitch. Oh gods I must stop imagining him talking dirty. Oh shit he's a Legilimens. Oh shit is he reading my mind?

"Hi Prof...Head...Se..." Ginny said trying not to blush but failing miserably.

Curious about the way Ginny was looking at him Severus drawled, "As we are not at school and this is a social call, I believe Severus will suffice."

The fact he asked her to call him Severus seemed to have the same effect as giving her the key to a treasure chest.

"Yes of course, Severus. Come in. Hermione's in the kitchen with Harry. I sort of got banned," she said looking embarrassed.

"I'm sure that's not the case," Severus said trying to save her feelings as they walked down the hallway to the familiar kitchen.

It was then a cacophony of babbling witches and wizards, all confined to their portraits, began calling Severus a traitor. He had expected this but Ginny froze in shock. He put his hand on Ginny's shoulder, which made her jump, and said "Don't worry I've heard worse," and then ceremoniously told the portraits to fuck off.

Walking into the kitchen, Severus noticed Hermione slavishly stirring a saucepan whilst Harry checked on the vegetables. Her hair was in a loose bun which she'd secured with her wand. A number of thoughts hit Severus all at once.

Firstly he had to admit that she looked damned sexy and had to do his best not to grab her and take her over the kitchen table. And then he thought he couldn't wait for her to start her apprenticeship properly, if she looks this hot and confident when brewing and had to do his best not to grab her and take her over the kitchen table. And then, as she turned to him and smiled, he thought oh fuck it why don't I just grab her and take over the kitchen table anyway?, only for Harry to break him out of his reverie.

"It's good to see you sir. How are you?" Harry asked nervously holding out his hand.

"Harry I thought I told you to call me Severus," he said shaking Harry's hand before adding "Aren't you going to get rid of those damnable portraits?"

"I would but I don't know what to do with them? Do you think Narcissa or Andromeda would like them?" Harry asked smiling awkwardly.

Hermione had told Harry earlier that she and Severus were soul mates, so he knew he would have to get used to seeing Severus more often socially as well as professionally. But the past was hard to forget, even if he had the utmost respect for Severus now. But for Hermione he would try to get on with him.

"Who knows what Narcissa wants," Severus drawled. "And as for Andromeda, I doubt she wants anything to do with her bigoted relatives. Oh and before I forget these are for you," and took two bottles of wine out from his robes and handed them to Harry.

Harry was rather taken aback, as was Hermione. Severus hadn't told her about this gesture and she couldn't hide how pleased she was that he was really trying to make the effort for her. As Harry turned to put them on the side she mouthed, thank you and then asked "aren't you going to say hello then?"

Severus took off his outer robes. "Hello,” he said smirking as Hermione rolled her eyes and huffed.

He walked up behind her, wrapped his arms around her waist and nuzzled her neck before kissing her cheek. "Is that better?" he whispered.

She leaned back into his chest and he tightened his grip on her slightly as he breathed in her familiar scent. "I suppose it will have to do until I get you home tonight," she giggled.

Severus found the sight of her doing something so completely domestic as cooking, quite erotic but he felt a pang of sadness that, despite everything, whilst he was headmaster, intimate scenes like this would be few and far between for them. And even then none of the kitchens in his properties, apart from Spinner's End which he was going to sell anyway, were cosy enough for what he had in mind.

He decided he really should stop being a whinging bastard. It wasn't as if he couldn't just buy them a cottage with a tiny kitchen that he could ravish her in. He had to admit that the idea had merit. He'd drop some hints and see what she thought.

"How was your meeting with Pius? Is he well?" she asked as she tasted the sauce.

"It was productive," Severus said resting his chin on the top of her head whilst continuing to hold her. "He's fine. He sends his regards and has invited us to dinner. I said we'd confirm the date, as we'll be going to Durmstrang and Beauxbaton in the next couple of weeks and I'm still waiting on exact dates from them. The Ministry only granted me permission to talk formally to them this afternoon."

"Am I coming with you then?" Hermione asked excitedly.

"Oh yes," Severus said cheekily as he planted a kiss on her hair. Hermione blushed as she realised the potential meaning of her question and giggled at his boldness.

"Oh look at you two," Ginny exclaimed excitedly. "You're so cute."

Severus arched an eyebrow and gave her a withering look, whilst Hermione told her to shut up and then giggled at Harry, who rolled his eyes at Ginny's outburst as he was taking the chicken out of the oven.

"Well you are," Ginny protested as she began to set one end of the large wooden table.

Harry walked over and put his arm around her and as he kissed her hair he said "Dinner smells nice, love."

"You two had to rescue it," Ginny said sounding disgruntled.

"Only right at the end and you haven't burnt anything," Harry laughed.

"And face it Gin, you usually do," Hermione quipped.

"You really know how to make me feel better," Ginny said sarcastically as she sat down and rested her chin in her hands on the table.

"Ginny the chances are you are a more than adequate cook. Practice makes perfect as they say," Severus said trying to be helpful.

"Thank you Severus," Ginny said smiling bashfully as she watched him take his frock coat off to reveal his white cotton shirt. She suddenly felt flustered as she thought why can't Harry dress like him? and fuck look at his arse.

Harry smirked as he saw the look on Ginny's face. "Severus is right," he said opening the wine. "The trouble is I'm the one she practices on," he giggled as he got out four glasses.

However, that giggle was short lived as Severus leaned over and whispered in his ear, "perhaps you should be a little more encouraging."

Harry jumped slightly as his new boss said this and suddenly felt like a first year again even though the sneer in Severus' voice wasn't present. A pained smile came over Harry's face and he nodded to Severus, almost as a thank you for pulling him up on this. He then gave Ginny a kiss to apologise.

"Sorry sweetheart. You can practice on me anytime you like," he said as he squeezed her hand tenderly.

However the moment was lost as Hermione chimed in with, "Oh Sev, look at those two. They look so cute". Severus just looked at her and smirked.

To Severus' surprise dinner, the company and the conversation were more pleasant than anticipated. However, that was more down to the fact Hermione was very much in control of the topics that were discussed and Ginny was just delighted Severus had taken his frock coat off.

And if Severus was surprised so was Harry. As the discussion moved to muggle music he was surprised by Severus' depth of knowledge on the subject. And soon the conversation moved to favourite artists and albums. When Harry said he loved The Beatles Severus laughed. "You really are your mother's son. Your father and godfather preferred the Stones but Lupin and your mother were Beatles fans."

"What about you?" Ginny asked completely fascinated by him.

"To be honest I didn't see what all the fuss was about. I preferred Led Zeppelin and Pink Floyd," he admitted shifting slightly awkwardly in his seat as he recalled the time Lily came round to his house one summer and told him to turn his music down as they sat in his bedroom. When he refused, they started play fighting and ended up snogging against the door.

He was suddenly dragged into the present as he heard Harry speak. "I think Remus fancied my mum," Harry said quietly, a small grin appearing on his face.

"Quite possibly. She was always very good to him when some of...well she was always there for him," Severus said trying not to brood.

And yet inevitably talk turned to their time at school. Whilst not apologising for anything, Severus did admit his behaviour towards them was often driven by the extreme stress he was under to protect them and the frustration he felt when they went off and did things on their own. And he had to play a role. But when he let slip that he'd been tortured for being too soft on the students during the last year, it was too much for Ginny to take in.

"But you were so horrible last year," Ginny said as a tear ran down her cheek. Hermione conjured her a handkerchief and handed it to her.

This cut Severus deeper than he expected it to. He pinched the bridge of his nose hard and sighed. "I cannot deny that but Dumbledore knew I was the best option to keep you all as safe as possible.

“When he asked me to kill him, I not only saved him from a painful death and Draco from a fate worse than death but it also confirmed my 'rightful' position at Voldemort's right hand. I had been slipping from favour because Bella was drip feeding him poison about me so that she could be at his side and yet when I killed the old man they were all practically falling at my feet.

“I therefore became Voldemort's logical choice to become headmaster. I was the lesser of all evils. However, despite my position in order to protect you all I was still considered to be too lenient."

"But how were you protecting us?" Ginny asked naively. She was not angry or accusatory. She just wanted to understand.

Severus sighed deeply. "I will be explaining all this to the head pupils and prefects before term starts but I believe you more than anyone needs to hear this, Ginny.

“If I'd let the Carrows have their way, there would have been fatalities. And you were one of their key targets. You were considered a blood traitor and your association with Harry meant you were even more at risk. And unfortunately that meant anyone who fraternised with you was also in danger. I had to be seen to be harsh on you but believe me it was nothing compared to what could have happened."

Ginny looked at Severus whose eyes were now firmly fixed the table. Hermione put her hand on his knee and his breath hitched imperceptibly at her touch. He didn't want to talk about this. Ginny was still holding the handkerchief but was wiping her eyes with the heel of her palm. "Were you tortured because of me?" Ginny asked him.

Slowly Severus raised his gaze and met her eyes. He didn't need to say anything for her to know that he had. Ginny stood up, walked around the table and threw her arms around his neck. "I'm so sorry. If we'd known...did it hurt?"

Severus closed his eyes and swallowed hard. This was completely unfamiliar territory for him. Even as head of house he'd never had a student hug him. And he knew Ginny was different. If all worked out as Severus wanted it to, this couple would be a permanent fixture in his life. But it was still awkward for him and he looked to Hermione and Harry for some help but neither were forthcoming.

Eventually Severus gave in and slowly put his arm around Ginny and whispered in her ear, "I would do it all again if I had to."

"But we...we were all so awful about you and you looked so ill. We didn't know," she sobbed and then sniffing hard she let go of him. But then as she looked down at him she could see not only Nagini's scar but other scars on his chest where his shirt was open. She gasped and instinctively wanted to reach out and touch one but stopped herself. 'H-how many scars have you got?" she asked quietly.

Severus looked at Hermione; his eyes pleading with her to say something. It was all too much. Only four living people had seen his scars – Hermione, Poppy, Minerva and Lucius. Three of those only saw them because they helped heal his wounds physically. Hermione was healing him in more ways than he could count.

"We've all got scars, Gin. Some of us have more than others," Hermione said quietly. "You never forget how you got them because those experiences shape you. They fade with time and they become a beautiful testament to what we fought for"

Hermione squeezed Severus' hand tightly as she said this. He bowed his head so his hair would cover his face. She knew by the way he squeezed her hand back he was struggling with his emotions.

Harry looked at Hermione and smiled. He couldn't say this to Severus yet so he said it to the next best thing. "I am extremely grateful that some of us have more scars than others, Hermione, especially as most were obtained defending me and those I love."

Severus suddenly looked up at Harry and chuckled softly. Harry was sure he'd seen tears in his eyes but then they were gone as Severus said almost lightheartedly, "If I can make one promise it will be that this year and future years at Hogwarts will be completely different to last. I'll still be a snarky bastard but I can assure you the risk of death by detention will be minimal."

They were all relieved that the tension, which filled the room, had been assuaged and then a wicked grin crept over Ginny's face. "Headmaster can Professor Potter give me detention?"

Severus arched an eyebrow, "Well Professor Potter won't be teaching you, young lady. I'll be taking your Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons," and then smirked, "but if you wish Professor Potter to give you detention please ensure your wards and silencing charms are in place first!"

Harry nearly spat out his mouthful of wine as Severus said this and Ginny gasped. It was the kind of answer she hoped to get from him but not in her wildest dreams did she think he would actually say it.

Hermione just smirked. She was relieved Severus was relaxed enough to begin acting like the man she knew and loved.

Ginny had just served the chocolate cake that Severus had made for dessert and whilst extolling the virtues of it declared that this cake was much better than 'Lucy-lu's cakes. Severus nearly choked.

"What did you just call him?" Severus exclaimed.

"Lucy-lu," Ginny said giggling. "One day I might pluck up enough courage to say that to his face."

"I've heard it all," Severus exclaimed. "Pius calls him Blondie seemingly but Ginny, I have known Lucius for twenty seven years...and that makes me feel so old...and even I wouldn't call him that. Very few of us can call him Lucy but Lucy-lu? Not a kneazle's chance in hell."

Hermione then giggled, "You should hear what she calls you?"

"If that's what she calls him then I dread to think what she calls me," Severus said looking perturbed and then added in a whisper, "tell me later"

"Don't you dare," Ginny protested looking embarrassed. "Anyway have you met Draco's boyfriend yet?"

"Yes," Hermione said, "he's really nice."

"Is it serious?" Harry asked. "I got the impression on Friday that it was but..."

"But what?" Severus drawled.

Harry looked pensive. "I don't know. I can't put my finger on it. He's come round here a few times recently..."

"He brings cake," Ginny announced and then put her hand over her mouth in embarrassment as she realised she actually had a mouthful of cake at the time.

"And he makes tea," Harry added smirking at Ginny as she finally swallowed her cake, "and he bought me a pint on Friday"

Severus arched an eyebrow in surprise at that revelation before narrowing his eyes. "Did you find him to be overcompensating, Harry?"

"Yes...yes that's what it is. I don't think he's being insincere...he's being too enthusiastic," Harry said looking at Severus.

"We're quite worried about him," Hermione said quietly.

"There's nothing wrong with being enthusiastic though is there?" Ginny asked.

"Ordinarily no," Severus said sounding tired, "but he has gone from announcing his relationship, asking me if he can move Adrian in, being affectionate...shall we say...on Saturday to basically not really caring if he was there or not on Sunday. There are also other behavioural issues that we have noticed and as you say he's not being insincere but he isn't being himself. And with Lucius suddenly disappearing to Paris we are trying to keep more of an eye on him."

"He seemed quite withdrawn this afternoon," Hermione said thoughtfully.

"Poor Draco," Ginny said but then asked, "so are you letting Adrian move in with him?"

"No," Severus said firmly.

"Oh! So is now a good time to talk about Harry and I living together at Hogwarts?" Ginny asked hopefully.

"Have you informed your parents of your engagement yet?" Severus asked with a serious tone.

"No not yet," Harry said knowing somehow that this was going to be a stumbling block.

"Out of respect for your parents, Ginerva, I won't discuss this further until you have told them. I apologise for my change in stance but it's going to be bad enough when we tell them I am seeing their adopted daughter let alone letting their only daughter live with her 'boyfriend'. I would after all like to procreate one day!"

"But you said...and you're practically living with Hermione," Ginny snapped but then shrank back as Severus' demeanour suddenly changed.

His voice was calm and measured but there was an air of the familiar Professor Snape authority, which Ginny could not ignore.

"First of all, if the board backs the proposal for Hermione, Harry and Neville to be made assistant professors, she will no longer be a student. Her apprenticeship and mastery will be deemed as private endeavours. That means Harry will be a professor and you will be a student. War heroes or not that puts me in a difficult position. I cannot be seen to condone a student/teacher relationship unless you are formally engaged. And thirdly and in some respects more importantly, Hermione is not your parents' only daughter"

"Look I'm not a kid," Ginny blurted out.

"Stop acting like one then and tell your parents," Severus snapped back at her but then his voice softened completely and Ginny almost melted. "Have you thought that perhaps your mother needs some good news...something to look forward to?"

"And besides," Hermione chipped in, "George seems really settled now."

"He and Angelina seem quite serious," Severus added.

"She looked quite happy when she was leaving the shop the other morning...thoroughly shagged to be honest," Harry said smirking as Hermione and Severus sniggered.

"He said they are just friends," Ginny said defensively.

"Well if they are just friends why would he tell me, when he accepted the position of flying instructor, that he had discussed it with Angelina?" Severus asked casually.

"But he would have told me," Ginny said sinking down on her chair.

"And if you react like that when you find out your brother hasn't told you he has a girlfriend, how do you think your parents will feel when they find out their daughter is engaged and you've not told them?" Severus asked gently. "You are not unintelligent, Ginerva. You know what you have to do?"

"I guess you're right," Ginny said admitting defeat. "Harry's visiting on Friday. Shall we tell them then?" she asked Harry.

He nodded and looked slightly nervous before he asked "Firewhisky, Severus?"

"It would be rude to refuse," Severus smirked as Hermione shook her head and rolled her eyes.

"Actually, Mum asked when you were going to see them next," Ginny said casually.

"I don't know. Whenever your idiot brother isn't there I suppose," Hermione said contemplatively as she recalled Ginny telling her earlier that Ron has been approached for another interview by the Prophet. It was supposed to be about his quidditch career but Hermione knew the chances of that being on the only subject brought up was remote. She decided not to tell Severus until later.

Ginny looked at her friend and felt guilty again about the things that Ron had said. She didn't think he was capable of such bile. Hermione didn't deserve it. "They're not expecting him back until next Wednesday."

"I've got a free afternoon on Friday and I know they will be upset if they find out about us at the Ball," Severus said suddenly to Hermione.

"As long as we're back by dinner I don't see why we can't go then. And besides if they tell them of their engagement first, Molly will be so happy I might just leave there alive."

Harry and Hermione were in fits of laughter as he said this, which was just as well because it meant Hermione was distracted when Ginny asked, "Why can't you stay for dinner? Mum won't mind."

"You are aware it is her birthday on Saturday?" Severus whispered.

Ginny nodded.

"That is why we can't stay for dinner on Friday," he said arching an eyebrow.

Ginny's suddenly became very animated as her conspiratorial side kicked in, "What have you got planned?" she asked excitedly.

Severus was about to tell her when Hermione asked "What are you two talking about?"

"Nothing," Ginny snapped furtively.

"I was about to tell Ginny about the huge surprise party I am throwing for your birthday but I suppose now the cat is out of the bag I will have to think of something else to do instead," Severus drawled.

"You are such a bastard," Hermione said giggling.

"Only just worked that out have you, my love?" Severus smirked.

"No but I've only recently been able to tell you to your face without fear of being hexed," she said sticking her tongue out at him.

"Put that tongue away unless you intend to use it," Severus chuckled softly.

"You wish," Hermione snarked.

"Excuse me you two I don't want to witness your foreplay thank you," Harry said teasingly

Fuelled by her glass of wine Ginny giggled "I do".

"Ginny!" Hermione exclaimed as suddenly the fireplace erupted in green flame and a completely overwrought Draco stumbled out.

"Draco what the bloody..." Severus started but Draco interrupted.

"It's Father"

Severus walked over to his godson and grabbed him by the arms. "What's wrong?"

Draco was in a complete panic. Tears were pouring down his face "I don't know what to do. I don't know where he is but something's happened...I know it has. He's missing"

"Draco sit down," Hermione said taking his hands and leading him to a chair. She summoned a glass of firewhisky and handed it to Draco. Harry just stood in awe at his friend's wandless, non-verbal magic.

Severus knelt in front of Draco and told him to calm down, take deep breaths and to start from beginning.

"I don't know where he is," Draco started, sobbing hard.

"No one knew where he was this afternoon so what has changed," Severus asked looking at Hermione earnestly.

"His business associate in Paris; the one he said he was meeting, called this evening and asked to speak to him," he spluttered out but this time he tried to hold back the tears.

"Go on sweetie, it's ok" Hermione said as he she pulled a chair up next to him and put her arm around him. She stroked his hair as he continued sobbing.

"I thought he meant he needed to speak to him about something they'd discussed and said he wasn't back yet. Then he said to pass on a message and tell him he needed to put the meeting they have on Friday back an hour.

"So I said fine and then he asked if I was joining Father so we could go out for dinner afterwards as it had been a couple of months since he'd seen us both."

By the time he'd finished saying this Draco was practically incoherent with tears.

Severus looked at Hermione and shook his head. Harry picked up the bottle of firewhisky and topped up Draco's glass.

"The implication therefore is that he hasn't seen Lucius," Severus stated trying to remain calm for both himself and Draco. Despite his stupidity at times, Lucius meant far more to Severus than he cared to admit.

Draco looked at Severus seeking some sort of comfort and said desperately "Exactly. So if he's not in Paris, where the fuck is he?"

But Severus' mind was whirring. "I've no idea," Severus stated coolly.

"There are still death eaters on the loose, Sev. What if he's been kidnapped?" Draco asked frantically.

"We'd have heard by now," Severus said distractedly.

"What if he's been killed?" Draco sobbed.

"We'd have heard by now." Severus' tone was more forceful this time and made Draco sit up and take notice.

"If any of the usual, or unusual suspects for that matter, had done anything to Lucius they would be bragging by now," Severus said thinking out loud.

"How can you be so sure? What makes you think you're right all the time?" Draco railed at Severus.

Severus was taken aback. "Draco, I've never claimed to..."

"I can't do this anymore," Draco interrupted; tears streaming down his face.

"Can't do what, love?" Ginny asked brushing his fringe from away from his eyes.

Draco then launched into a tirade of self loathing. "This. Pretending it's all OK. You think you're all so fucking superior. You all came out of this smelling of roses but I'm not a war hero...I'm a coward. You'll all be lauded next week and I'll be glared at. I'll be despised.

“My family is a disgrace. I'm a disgrace. Even my own mother doesn't want anything to do with me. Am I that much of a failure?

“And I've fucked everything up with Adrian...I don't know what I want but I know I don't deserve someone like him. I don't deserve anyone but that doesn't matter because who but a muggle would want me? No one in our world would have me.

"What have I got to live for? If I wasn't here no one would miss me. No one cares. In fact there would be some who would throw a party I bet"

"Don't be so fucking stupid Draco," Severus snapped. "I care, Hermione cares, Adrian cares, your father does care...he's just a self centred bastard at times. And so does your mother.

“I know you and Adrian are having issues but even if things don't work out there will always be someone out there who cares for you; I know there is."

"We care as well don't we Harry?" Ginny said, her eyes pleading with him not to hesitate in his response.

"Of course we do, Draco," Harry said putting his hand on his shoulder. "We might not have seen eye to eye in the past but you've changed; we've all grown up and well I hope we'll go out for a pint more often."

Draco gave an ironic laugh "Yeah right...don't try and make me feel better. You know I envy you Potter. You didn't know your mother so you could never have disappointed her. She died..."

"Draco stop this now," Severus barked at him but Draco ignored him.

"Your mother died so even if you did upset her she'd never leave you a letter and tell you she didn't care about you," Draco said continuing to laugh but with tears in his eyes.

Given her conversation with Severus earlier, Hermione didn't want to use Draco's pet name but she knew she had to now. "Drakey, that's not what she said in that letter..." but Draco cut her off.

"Yeah of course mother cares. If she cares so much, where the fuck is she?" Draco yelled. Hermione pulled him into her but he was inconsolable.

"Hermione, Ginny keep talking to him. Harry come with me," Severus ordered as he walked out of the kitchen into the living room.

"Is Kreacher still attuned to finding any member of the Black family?" Severus asked almost frantically.

Harry looked surprised at the question but suddenly it dawned on him why Severus was asking. "Yes but only direct blood relatives. He can't find Lucius but he can find Narcissa"

"Good," Severus said urgently. "I'm going to take Draco back to Hermione's rooms at the castle. I've got all the potions I need to calm him there. We'll go now. If Kreacher can find Narcissa he can take her straight there. For apparition purposes he needs to think of The Private Chambers of The Headmaster's Wife"

"That she is," Harry said with an exaggerated sigh.

Severus allowed a smile to creep across his face but he was still a very proud man and what he said next was not at all easy for him. "Enough of your cheek Potter but I am sorry this evening had to end like this. I confess I feel no need to hex you so perhaps you and Ginny would like to come to the Manor soon. I know Hermione would love you to come," Severus said almost bashfully.

"I'd like that. Thank you. Ginny will scream like a lunatic when I tell her," Harry smirked. "Actually, I did have something to give you. I found a few things when I was clearing out Godric's Hollow that I believe mum would have wanted you to have. Now isn't a good time but I'll bring them with me on Thursday."

"Well now, I admit I am curious but yes bring whatever it is on Thursday. Draco is our current concern," Severus said slightly impatiently but his mind raced back to what Phineas had said about what Sirius had told Remus about Lily's dream.

Severus walked back into the kitchen and pressed a soft, lingering kiss onto Hermione's forehead. He felt slightly guilty and tried to purge his mind of the curiosity he was now experiencing. It wasn't Potter's fault but Severus didn't know if he wanted his past raked up when he was so happy with his present and what he hoped would be his future.

From the living room Harry called Kreacher.

"Master calls," Kreacher drawled with a sneer.

"Yes Kreacher," Harry said quickly, "I need you to locate Narcissa Malfoy and take her to The Private Chambers of The Headmaster's Wife at Hogwarts. Headmaster Snape and Mistress Granger will be there with Master Draco. Tell her Headmaster Snape wishes to discuss Master Draco with her immediately"

"Kreacher will obey," and disappeared with a pop.
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The Headmaster's Wife