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Much Ado About Nothing	By : goblet Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male Views: 2534 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING
by The Goblet

Chapter 20

"Can I borrow some cologne?" asked Sirius as he walked into the dormitory wearing nothing but a towel.

Remus, who was hanging half out the window, trying to air the room, looked incredulously at his friend. "Go hug James," he said, before disappearing back out the window.

Sirius took a few more steps into the room before he was overcome by the fumes of James' aftershave.

"Prongs, did you bathe in it?" he asked. "You smell like a perfumery."

"Tell me about it," moaned Remus as he took a deep breath of fresh air.

Sirius looked over to see Remus looking very pale and green about the gills. "James, go and wash that off now," he ordered, rushing to the werewolf's side.

He reached Remus, just as he was beginning to swoon from the strength of James' cologne. Sirius glanced back at James who had yet to move from his bed.

"Potter! Move! You've made Moony sick."

James finally looked up from a parchment he was writing on. He saw Sirius supporting Remus as he leant out the window. He jumped up from the bed.

"I'm sorry!" he pleaded as he took a step towards his friends. "I forgot that it makes you sick."

"Just go," growled Sirius, as Remus began retching. "Wash it off!"

James rushed from the room, mortified that he had forgotten that Remus didn't react well with strong perfumes.

Sirius remained, rubbing Remus' back, and casting a freshening charm over the dormitory. He had become an expert on the charm when Peter started getting bad gas from eating too much cheese.

"You'll be fine," he reassured his friend as Remus continued to gag. "Come inside and lie down until you feel less woozy," he said gently, pulling Remus away from the window and leading him to his bed.

He helped Remus to lie down, and leaned down, brushing the hair away from the werewolf's eyes. "Better?" he asked.

Remus nodded gently.

Sirius sat on the side of the bed. "What brought that on, do you think?" he asked, nodding towards the bathroom. James was usually quite sparse with cologne, especially after living with a werewolf for seven years.

Remus' eyes twinkled, even though he was still ghostly pale. "Lily," he said softly.

"Of course," replied Sirius, a grin plastered on his face. "Looks like our plan is working, dear Moony."

"He was writing something on his bed," Remus recalled. "I bet you a galleon that it is something about Lily. Or something to Lily."

Sirius grinned and got to his feet. "Let's just see shall we?" he whispered, turning to face Remus. "Keep an eye out for him."

As Sirius was talking to his friend, the towel which he had secured around his waist began to slip. He grabbed at it to stop it from falling, but was too late as it pooled around his ankles.

Remus blushed as he found himself eye to crotch with his best man.

"Sorry," mumbled Sirius as he stooped to retrieve his towel, his face the colour of a tomato.

A cologne-free James ambled into the room as he returned from the showers. "How does he compare with Snape?" he asked smirking.

Sirius secured his towel once more as Remus' blush deepened. "That's for me to know, and you to forget about," the werewolf said softly, closing his eyes.

"Later," whispered Sirius to Remus, abandoning his quest to discover what James had been writing. He returned to his bed, digging around in his trunk for something suitable to wear.

"I'm sorry Moony," James said, sitting on Remus' bed as he waited for Sirius to dress. "I didn't realise that it was making you sick. I'd have washed it all off earlier, honest!"

"It's ok," whispered Remus. "I'll be fine."

"No it's not," James grumbled. "The one night we finally got you away from Snivellus and I almost end up killing you. Yes, I can see me telling him now: 'Er – Sorry Sniv, he was poisoned. By who – er – me… well I didn't mean to! Look here, it says 'Death by Cologne' on his death certificate – yeah poisoned through the nose.'"

"Please don't call him Snivellus, his name is Severus," Remus said quietly.

"Sorry Moony," James apologised. He wasn't quite sure that Snape would enjoy being called by his first name.

Sirius returned to Remus' bedside. "Ready to go?" he asked. "We're meeting Peter at seven."

James stood from the bed, and held a hand out to Remus.

The cry of "FREEEDDDOOOMMM!" was heard as the groom got to his feet.

Remus' Freedom Night had begun.

Sirius and James entered the Hog's Head inn amongst gales of laughter. They stopped just inside the entrance surveying the crowded rooms, while waiting for Remus to catch up to them.

It was another five minutes before the groom finally trudged into the pub. His right foot was clamped to a ball and chain. The heavy cannonball was emblazoned with Severus' initials and a rather good sketching of his face, even though the nose was slightly too large.

Remus wasn't too pleased that his friends were referring to his upcoming marriage as a prison sentence, but they had charmed the shackle so that he could not unfasten it and he was left wearing it until Sirius deemed its removal. Remus knew that his right ankle was going to be dreadfully bruised come morning from dragging the cannonball around.

"Hello boys!" called Aberforth as he spotted the trio. "Peter will be down soon, he's just gone upstairs to take a shower."

The three men made their way to the bar and greeted the Innkeeper. One look from Aberforth and three of the clients sitting on the barstools disappeared into the crowd.

"Was that…?" asked Remus.

Sirius nodded. "Regulus and Rabastan."

"Sit, sit," Aberforth insisted, not noticing the boys' slight distraction. He cleaned down the bench and placed three clean shot glasses in front of each stool, and then pulled out one for himself. The younger Dumbledore then poured out four generous servings of firewhisky.

Aberforth raised a fourth glass in the air. "To Remus and his beautiful bride, may you both live happily for the rest of your days," he toasted, before swallowing his shot in one swallow.

James and Sirius tried to hide their snickers as Albus' brother referred to Severus as a beautiful woman. He certainly wasn't beautiful (at least not to normal folk) and he definitely wasn't a woman; although technically, he was rather girly, with his long hair, and his affinity towards men.

A dark look from Remus stopped their giggles in an instant, and they each followed Aberforth's lead, swallowing the firewhisky in one gulp.

Aberforth poured himself another glass and quickly downed it. "Well boys, I must be off now," he announced. "I'm in charge of the Citizen's Watch tonight."

James and Sirius exchanged glances. They both had dubious opinions about the Watch. "If there's any trouble, don't try to take them on yourselves," said Sirius.

James nodded. "It's probably better to spy on any suspicious characters and report them to the Aurors."

Remus laid a hand on Aberforth's arm. "Just be careful, and have a great night," he told the Headmaster's brother.

Aberforth smiled. "You too, young un'. Tonight, your drinks are on the house."

"So there was Moony hanging out the window, practically comatose, and Prongs here was sitting on his bed, writing down his deepest darkest secrets, smelling as though he had fallen in a vat of perfume," Sirius explained to Peter almost three hours later.

The entire table burst into laughter. The Marauders had all drunk a little too much alcohol, and were all feeling very merry.

James tried to defend himself. "I did not. It was only a few sprays."

"A few sprays? You nearly had to floo me to St Mungo's," Remus admonished.

"You smelt like a perfumery," replied Sirius.

Peter watched the exchange go on between the three friends. He was feeling decidedly left out. Having taken a job at the Hog's Head while James and Sirius trained as Aurors, and Remus studied at university, he felt completely left out of the loop. He sighed. "I wish you had gotten a stripper," he moaned. "I like strippers."

James giggled. "Moony's already had a strip tease today, hasn't he?" he said poking the werewolf in the ribs.

Sirius blushed. "Don't remind me," he mumbled.

"What happened?" asked Peter, feeling left out once again. He really did hate being separated from his friends.

"After I came back from the bathroom, I caught Paddy waving his family jewels in Moony's face. Moony refused to tell us how Sniv- Snape's compared."

Peter burst out laughing. "I didn't know you had it in you!" he said, clapping Sirius on the back.

"My towel fell off," Sirius growled.

"Sure it did," James said, smirking.

"Was he any good?" Peter asked Remus.

Remus flushed. He thought widely to change the subject. He turned to James. "So what, or should I say who were you wearing all that cologne for?" he asked.

"No-one," answered James, a little too quickly.

"No-one?" Sirius asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No-one!"

"Does Prongs have a crush on a girl?" asked Peter in a sing-sing voice.

"No!"

"I think he does!" Remus exclaimed.

Sirius laughed. "I thought you hated the idea of dating girls," he said. "Unless… you've taken a sudden fancy to a man…"

"I have not!"

"So it is a girl?" teased Remus.

James glared at Remus.

"Is it Lily?" asked Peter.

James' cheeks reddened.

"It is! It is Lily!" Peter shouted. "James and Lily sitting in a tree, K I S S I N G –"

James stood up, halting Peter's song in mid-verse. "I need to use the men's room," he announced, leaving his three smirking friends.

Remus and Sirius shared a knowing look. Bingo! James had finally fallen for Lily.

"I knew he liked Lily," Peter told his friends. "When we went down to the Potions Lab the other night, he asked me to leave so that he could put the moves on her."

Sirius burst out laughing. He was about to tell Peter that they had set them up, when one of the waitresses walked up to the table.

She handed Peter a note, and was about to walk away when Sirius caught her eye. He smiled at her encouragingly. Remus rolled his eyes.

"Is there anything I can get you boys?" she asked.

"Four Dragon's Breaths please," Sirius ordered.

"Make that three," Peter said, standing from the table. He folded his note, and slipped it into his robes. "You will have to excuse me for a few minutes," he told his friends. "Something has come up."

Peter finished his pint of lager. "I may be some time, but I'll hurry back as soon as possible," he told them.

Remus nodded. "If James has gotten himself stuck trying to sneak out the toilet window, make sure to spank his bottom a few times," he said, giggling. Perhaps it was time that he stopped drinking.

The waitress looked at Remus as though he had two heads.

"Our friend was gone off in a huff because we were teasing him about a girl. He has been known to sneak out from dates through toilet windows," explained Sirius. He turned to Peter. "We'll be here, take your time."

"Thanks," Peter replied before making his way out of the bar.

"So yes, let's make that two Dragon's Breaths…"

tbc...

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Much Ado About Nothing