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I Understand	By : LMG67 Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 9627 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Author Notes
- 2-Revelation
- 3-Grief
- 4-Horror
- 5-Thoughts
- 6-Anger
- 7-Training
- 8-Explanation
- 9-Expressions
- 10-Thinking
- 11-Tower
- 12-Pain
- 13-Seperate
- 14-Questions
- 15-Tears
- 16-In their own words
- 17-Tantrum
- 18-Sorrow
- 19-Darkness
- 20-Light
- 21-Passion
- 22-Breath
- 23-Suspicions
- 24-Iggy
- 25-Fear
- 26-Decisions
- 27-Understanding
- 28-Draco
- 29-Harry
- 30-Fallout
- 31-Accidents...
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BREATH

Harry somehow made it out of the door to Draco’s room. Two steps into the anti-room of the
infirmary, his body stopped responding to his orders to move. His knees gave out and Harry found
himself kneeling on the floor with one hand out bracing himself up. His arm shook but luckily it
held, just barely keeping him from doing a full facer on the floor.

He couldn’t breath. He couldn’t see. He remembered that he didn’t have his glasses anyway and that
could be the reason he could not see. He didn’t understand why he couldn’t breath though. I mean
it’s not like all the air just disappeared is it? His harsh gasps for breath were loud in the dark
room.

He felt like he was standing on a cliff. But there was nothing below him that he could see.

Oh My God...oh my god...oh my....god...god.my.god.....No nO nonono..

He could not do this. He was so scared. He was breaking. Dark. Cold. Not want to be cold, he
remembered that.

But he had been warm, he had been on fire, and he had walked away. Fire. He walked away from
his fire. What was he thinking!

His sobs grew louder and the air grew scarce and still Harry could not move.

What if someone comes? He asked himself and then the fight for air received precedent from any
thoughts he might have had.

Damned inconvenient this need for air, he thought with a harsh and painful gasp for that elusive life
giving substance.

So this is dying?

~`*`~

Draco was drowning. The raw emotion that he had seen on Harry’s face frightened the living hell
out of him. He could not stop his tears just like he could not stop the flinch from crossing his face.
He had collapsed on his bed in a boneless heap as the emotions rolled over him. Why? Why him?
Why couldn’t he let him in? Why did he even want in?

Don’t cry for me, he had whispered. Why not? Was he not good enough to cry for him? Was he
always never going to be good enough? Or was that even it? Did Harry not want him to cry for him
because he couldn’t cry for himself?

That thought made Draco‘s tears dry up. Malfoy’s don’t cry and it shook him to his core to realize
he had cried for Harry, for his pain, for him. He resolved to do whatever he could to fix Harry
because Draco believed that Harry was broken, just like him.

He couldn’t stay here. Suddenly he had this overwhelming need to go outside. Anxiously he got up;
he searched frantically for his shoes and groaned when he could not find them. He gave a loud HA!
When he saw them and he slipped on his shoes and grabbing his cloak he set out for some fresh air.
He wiped his face of his tears and steeled his shoulders. It was late so he didn’t think that he would
meet up with anyone but that didn’t mean he would walk around slumped over. Malfoy’s walk
upright he thought disdainfully, like we corncobs suck up our bums or something.

Draco did not know what he had whispered before he left but he had a gut feeling that that would
help answer some of the questions that he had. He made a note to ask Granger, she might know.

Swinging his cloak around him he walked to the door to leave.

~`*`~

Harry was close to unconsciousness when he heard a sound behind him. Draco was coming out of
his room. Harry’s panic rose to new heights as he imagined the derision on the other boy’s face when
he saw him. Harry willed his body to move but it was beyond help. Harry hung his head and rested it
on the floor. Let him see me, he thought, I don’t care anymore.

Draco stopped dead when he saw Harry. His mind could not grasp what he was seeing. Harry was
on his knees on the floor bracing himself up with one hand. He could tell he was shaking and he
could hear him gasping for breath but still it did not register in his brain exactly what he was seeing.

Oh My God he’s dying!

Feeling his heart give a painful lurch Draco rushed over to Harry. He put his arms around the
shaking boy and tried to lift him up.

“You have to help me Potter. I can’t do this by myself,” he ground out straining to hold the other
boy up.

Harry was limp in Draco’s arms for he had not the strength to move. He forced his head up and
stared into the concerned eyes of the boy who held him.

Draco could see the tears in his eyes but he noticed that he had not shed a single one.

He doesn’t cry either!

They could not take their eyes off of each other. Neither knew how long they had been looking into
the others eyes. Neither cared. It was as if time had stopped and only Harry and Draco were left in
the world.

Harry felt the panic that had begun to overtake him lessen as soon as Draco’s arms went around
him. He gave no thought to what it meant only knowing that he needed this, needed it more than the
air he was trying so hard to breath in just a few moments before. He didn’t care anymore. He had no
strength to push him away and he found he didn’t want too.

His eyes traveled over Draco’s face and he saw the tell-tail tracks of his tears. He had cried. I told
him not too but still he cried! Harry did not know what to make of this information.

Ask him.

I can’t

Why?

Does it matter right now anyway?

Not really.

Thank you

For what?

For not pushing it

You’re welcome. Bloody frustrating problem you have now though

I know

Ready to give in and tell him?

No

OK

Harry sighed. He shifted in Draco’s arms and felt them tighten around him. Reaching up he drew a
finger through one of the tear tracks on the blonde’s face following it from the corner of his eye to
right by the side of his full red lips. He smiled softly as Draco shivered with his touch. He lost
himself in Draco’s eyes and for a second he wondered what they would look like filled with love and
staring at him, only for him.

Harry pulled away and both boy's stood, each shaking from the efforts of the last hour.

Harry’s breathing had calmed down and slowly he could feel his heart rate decrease. He didn’t speak
for there was no words that he could say that would do justice to the moment. Seconds past as they
stared at each other.

Draco felt lost in Harry’s eyes. They seem to say so much but it was in a language that Draco had
yet to decipher. Draco held his breath wondering if Harry was going to say anything. Draco could
still feel where Harry had touched him. He wanted to reach out and pull him back into his arms but
he didn’t.

Both knew that there were no words to be said. There was too much emotion in both of them at this
moment for words to even matter. It was like they could see each other’s feelings. For instant, Draco
could tell that Harry was calmer now but still was determined to say nothing and Harry could tell
that Draco was confused but still determined to find out the truth. Once again, none of that mattered.
And neither boy questioned how they knew just that it was, was enough for them.

Draco sighed as he saw the resolve in Harry’s eyes. What was it going to take to break down the
walls he had built around himself, Draco thought?

Everything that you have

And if I can’t give it?

Then you need to stop this now, because if you take this any further there will be no going
back

I don’t care

I didn’t think you would

What do I do?

Let him go for now. He is tired. He needs to sleep.

Draco had a thought. He knew the voice in his head was no more his subconscious then he was a
goat and he had come to accept that for a fact. That is why he had no trouble asking his next
question.

Do you know why?

Yes

Will you tell me?

No

Why?

He has to be the one to tell you

I see

Do you?

Well, no, but it doesn’t matter right now

No it doesn’t

Draco watched Harry as he conversed with the voice inside his head. He did not know that Harry
was doing the same thing.

You need sleep. Your body won’t be able to function much longer.

I know

Then go to bed

I can’t just leave

Why not? You were going to do exactly that before. What has changed?

He cried

Yes he did. For you.

Why?

Ask him

No

Stubborn fool. Then go to bed. You can ask him tomorrow.

OK

With one more glance that held everything that he was Harry turned and walked out of the
infirmary. When Harry got to his bed he fell onto it and was quickly in a deep healing sleep.

Holding that glance to his heart Draco turned and walked back into his room and got in bed falling
into a deep healing sleep.

~`*`~

Bout damn time. I didn’t think it would take this much work.

Has it started?

Yes. Soon.

Good.

Are you ready?

I have been for a while now.

We all miss you.

I do as well.

Is everything ready?

Yes, it will happen on Sunday.

He won’t be hurt?

Yes he will but he will recover.

It is a big risk.

But worth it.

Yes.

Goodnight.

Night.

Albus Dumbledore stepped out of the shadows of the infirmary’s anti-room and walked down the
hall to his own bed.

********************************************************************

Enjoy!

LMG
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I Understand