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Struggling Through New Beginnings	By : HarryGinny4eva Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 31233 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: Spoilers - I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 22
- 23
- 24
Disclaimer: Spoilers - I do
not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from
the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Author Note � Here�s another double
chapter. It�s about time to jump forward a bit, don�t you think? lol Let me know your thoughts. Thank you!

Chapter 24

�Then she said Hermione�s actually interested in that asshole! How daft is
that?!� Harry said as he rubbed his fists against his eyes, trying to rub back
the headache that had formed behind them.

Ron sat next to him on the sofa, his long legs stretched out in front of him,
as they enjoyed the privacy of their common study area.

�Yeah, well, maybe we�ll get lucky and one of the two of them will realize how
stupid it all is,� Ron sighed tiredly.

Harry looked at him in shock, �Is that all you have to say?! You�re VERY recent
ex-girlfriend, is interested in I-hate-all-people-not-of-rich-pureblood-Draco
Malfoy! How can you be so calm about this?�

Ron shrugged, �Dunno, Harry. But, we weren�t good together,
you know that. I want her happy, and as dumb as I think this crush is, if it
makes her happy, I�ll hold back for a while.�

�But, it�s MALFOY!� Harry exploded and jumped off the sofa. �Are you mad?!�

�Calm down, Harry,� Ron answered. �I didn�t say I was happy about it. But, it�s
what she wants for now, and he seems to want it, too, so��

�So, you�re just going to sit back and let that�that ferret�that ex-Death Eater
do whatever it is he has planned to do? To our best friend?!�

Ron looked up at Harry angry face and sighed, �I can�t say for sure, but I
don�t think he�s planning anything, Harry. Not this time?�

�How can you say that?! He�s pretending to want to be with Hermione!� Harry
threw his hands wildly as he spoke. �Like anyone would believe that the Great
Pureblood asshole would really be interested in the most famous muggleborn witch in the world!�

Before Ron could answer Harry hurried on, �Ah, that�s it!�

�What�s it?� Ron asked when Harry stopped moving and seemed to have frozen in
place.

�Don�t you see? God, what a jerk! He�s going to try and use her to get back
into the world�s good graces. Let them see how much he�s supposedly changed by
dating a muggleborn witch! And, the
money!� Harry slammed his fist into his other open palm. �He�s lost practically
everything! With all the money Hermione got from the Ministry for her part in
the war, he could be set for life if he could get some from her!�

Ron shook his head, �Harry, think about what you�re saying. Malfoy wouldn�t
saddle himself with Hermione for the rest of his life, just to get her money.
If nothing else his pride wouldn�t allow it. And, plus, she�s smarter than
that. She wouldn�t let herself be used like that.�

�But, Ginny said it earlier. Hermione�s never been romanced, seduced. No
offense, mate. Hermione wouldn�t know what was hitting her if he turned on that
snaky charm!�

Ron knew there was no talking to Harry about this any longer. Where Malfoy was
concerned, Harry had never listened to reason. Heck, he hadn�t either before,
but things changed. Between the stuff he�d read and seen over the summer about
the Malfoy family, and sharing meals with the man he�d hated forever, Ron had
started to see a new person emerge. He couldn�t claim to like the new Draco
Malfoy, but as with everything else in their lives, he was willing to give this
change a chance.

�I think we should trust HER, Harry,� Ron finally said. But, then, to show his
loyalty to his friend, he added, �But, we can keep an eye on the slimy tosser behind her back.�

Harry nodded and sat back down to think about what they could do as he
continued to rub his temples. The stress of all the changes of the past few
days had gotten to him. He accioed some pain potion
and sat back next to Ron with an aggravated sigh. As the silence stretched
between them, Harry had a realization.

�Wow!� he said softly as he turned the vial around and around in his hands.

Ron turned to look at him with a questioning look on his face, �What?�

Harry laughed and shook his head, �Just having a normal person moment. They
still throw me, I guess.�

�What do you mean?�

Harry smiled, �I�m having a normal person, non scar-related headache. It�s
strange. I can barely remember the last time that happened.�

Ron laughed, but he fully understood what his friend meant,
�Only you would be happy to be in pain.�

xxxxx

�Pain in the ass!� Blaise said under his breath, but it was still heard by the other
occupants of the room.

��

Three sets of eyes watched Ginny�s shoulders straighten and her chin lift, but
she continued on her trek back up to her room in stoic silence. Silence had
fallen over the group when she�d come down the stairs to get some grapes and
some water. Not a word had been said while she was in the kitchen, nor as she�d
begun her progress back up the stairs with her snack. Then, just as she reached
the top, Blaise has spoken.

Theo sighed heavily after the Head Girl�s bedroom door closed softly, �Why? She
didn�t even say anything. What is your issue with her, anyway?�

�Nothing, but she�s part of them,� he spat distastefully. �It�s almost as bad
as having to live with Granger!�

�And?� Greg asked grumpily.

Blaise raised an eyebrow at them, �Isn�t that enough?�

�No,� Theo shook his head. �Not anymore it�s not.�

Greg took another sip of his glass of firewhiskey and
frowned, �You know what, Blaise? I think it�s time you finally accept that we
lost. We were wrong. They didn�t do anything TO us. In fact, they saved some of
our lives. Dammit, they did the same thing what we
did; fought for what they believed in. It�s like you�re obsessed or something!
Get over it!�

Blaise�s face flushed in anger as he turned to his friend, �Piss off! Just
because you can�t get into Granger�s tight little underpants, doesn�t give you
the right to take it out on me. I swear, just because you and Draco finally
noticed she has a nice ass, doesn�t mean the rest of us have to fall all over
ourselves making nice to the little bint!�

�Maybe Granger�s ass is the real problem,� Theo mumbled into his glass.

�Meaning?� Blaise snapped.

Theo looked up at the two men and shrugged a little, �You don�t want to know.�

�Oh, I think I do,� Blaise sneered. �Come on, Mr. Smartass, say it.�

The look on Blaise�s face dared Theo to speak. And, Theo, a bit afraid of his
angry friend, decided retreat was the best solution. Putting his glass down, he
stood.

He moved toward the portrait door as he spoke, �Look, I didn�t mean anything,
Blaise. Forget it. I have to go get some studying done before bed. Uh, thanks
for the drinks. Good night.�

Neither of the other men spoke as the door portrait swung closed behind Theo�s
back.

After a few moments of uncomfortable silence Blaise finally sighed as he
reached for his glass, �Jerk!�

�Oh, shut it,� Greg said with a thoughtful look on his face.

�Hey! You do remember whose room this is, right?�

Greg�s voice rose with each word, �Oh yeah, I do. It�s the Head�s room. It�s
the room of the man who just ran one of his few friends from it. It�s the room
of a man who can�t face reality. It�s the room of a man, who is so fuckin� delusional, it�s sad!�

�What the hell are you talking about?� Blaise screamed back into Greg�s face.
Although, Blaise wasn�t as wide as Greg, he was just as tall and he�d never
been afraid of the larger boy, now man.

�The same thing as Theo!� Greg snapped. �Did it never
occur to you examine your fixation? First, Ginny in fourth
year and now Hermione. Theo and I were talking about the war, you were the one who kept bringing her into it. Tight little pants? Nice ass? What�s that say, Blaise? Think
about it!�

�You�re barking mad if you think I�d ever want the VP! Whatever it is you and
Draco suddenly find so damn interesting about her is lost on me! I wouldn�t
lower myself to touch that mud��

His voice was cut off as Greg�s hand closed on his throat and he hissed, �Watch
it!�

Blaise shook off Greg�s hand and stepped back, �What the hell is wrong with
you?�

Greg shook his hands as if to loosen them up and looked at Blaise, �At the
moment? You!�

Blaise was angry and confused. His friends telling him something he�d denied to
himself, had made it painfully clear, and he wasn�t yet ready to accept or
admit to it. In reaction he attacked back.

Blaise�s face lit in an evil grin, �Wait, did I hit a nerve, Greggy? When I said you and Draco, did you finally realize
you�d lost to him again? Did it finally piss you of that you bowed out of the
fight before it even started? When are you going to stop bowing to his ass and
doing his damn bidding? You want Granger, go for it. You�ve got as much right
to take out trash as the next guy!�

xxxxx

Ginny tried to block out the sounds of the guys
shouting about Hermione below. It wasn�t until the tone of their voices changed
that she realized they were no longer having a friendly fight; a real one had
taken its place. She wondered if it was her place or right to intervene. Part
of her wanted to protect her friend�s honor, part wanted to deduct points just
because she could, but the biggest part simply wanted to tell them to all grow
up and shut up.

When she�d first come back to her room with Harry, she�d urged him to go talk
to Ron rather than come in with her. Too much had happened in too short a time
and she needed a break from it all. Her plan had been to take a long, hot bath
and curl up with a nice love story. But, the tension and then fighting from the
men downstairs made her more tense than when she�d come in the room in the
first place. Intent on ending things downstairs, so that she could finally
relax, she headed back downstairs for the second time.

Her steps faltered on the steps as she heard Blaise�s last insult to her
friend, and then watched Greg knock him out cold in one swing. Later, she would
laugh at the look on Blaise�s face as he went down, but first she had to deal
with a very angry, very large Slytherin man in her common room.

�Uh, Greg?� she began.

�What?!� he grunted as he hurriedly turned to face her. She watched his face
slowly drain of anger as he realized what he had done, and to whom. �Oh, shit!�

Ginny took a tentative step forward and smiled a bit, �I always knew you were
strong, but that was��

�Detention and how many points?� he asked in defeat as his shoulders dropped
and he hung his head.

�None from me, in fact I just might give you some,� she smiled fully. �But, you
may want to avoid him for a while.�

Greg nodded and continued to look at her sadly.

�Are you�� she began. Then she took the last steps to stand near him, �Greg,
are you okay?�

�I�m sorry,� he said and stepped back from her to turn away. �For
what he said. For what I did. Merlin, I wanted
this year to be different! It�s only the second night and��

Ginny placed her hand on his shoulder from behind the sofa as she said, �And,
it�s only the second night. As much as we all want things to be miraculously
different and better this year, we need to give it time.�

She waited a moment for him to acknowledge what she�d said before she
continued, �Old hurts, prejudices, and pain don�t go away over night, Greg.
Most of us had time to come to terms with a lot of things that happened last
year, and over the summer. Blaise didn�t. He wasn�t forced to fight, not for
either side. He never had to choose in the end. Maybe that�s part of why he�s
so angry still. He never got to choose. His whole world has changed and he had
no say in it.�

Greg turned to her as she sat beside him on the sofa, �It�s not like the rest
of us had a say, Ginny.�

�But, you did, don�t you see? How do I explain this? Look, before the war you
made a choice, you picked a side. Then, you fought for what you believed in at
the time. And, you lost, thank all that�s magical. But, you got your say; you
made your stand. What you had to deal with afterward was the loss. Yes, you had
to pay for what you did in other ways, too, but emotionally, you all had to
find a way to get past losing.�

�Yeah, so?� Greg asked.

Ginny smiled softly, �What you and your friends are failing to see is that
Blaise didn�t get that. He�s suffering the loss, too. But, he doesn�t even have
the, I guess satisfaction is the best word, of having been in the fight. He may
be a wanker, and a loud mouth, but I think he
deserves some of his anger.�

�Are you defending him?!� Greg asked, his eyes widening.

�Hell, no,� Ginny laughed bitterly. �I�m just saying change is hard on
everyone. We all had a few months to get through most of it; to decide what we
did and didn�t want out of this year; to figure out who we wanted to be. He
didn�t get that. He had what? A few weeks after he got back?
He�s still trying to grasp all that happened while he was gone, he�s got all
this new responsibility being Head Boy, and he�s got no one to talk to, really
talk to. You lot have done nothing but tell him he�s wrong and needs to accept
things. And, while I agree with you, I also think you need to give him the time
you got. Let him come to terms with things and figure out what he wants out of
it all.�

Greg stared at her for a moment before a grin spread across his face, �No
wonder you�re Head Girl. You�re really good at this talking to people stuff.�

Ginny laughed softly, �Gee thanks.�

�But, I get what you�re saying. I�ll try. But, he makes it so hard, you know?�

Ginny nodded and tilted her head thoughtfully, �Kinda
hard seeing your old self and hearing all the things you used to say all the
time, huh?�

Greg flushed a bit as he nodded, �Yeah, it is. I can barely believe I used to
sound like that.�

Ginny bumped him lightly with her elbow, �Well, at least you�ve finally come
around.�

�If you two are finished all this sissy shit, maybe you could shut the hell up.
I have a pounding headache and I�m trying to remember a reason not to kill
you!� Blaise grumbled from his spot on the floor.

Both Ginny and Greg jumped at the sound of his voice and Ginny got up quickly to
move out of the line of fire.

�Don�t make me take points from you, Zabini!� she snapped as he stood and moved
toward Greg.

Blaise stopped and looked over at her and sneered, �Maybe losing some house
points on his face will help me �come to terms with things.��

Ginny�s mouth dropped open hearing her words thrown back at her, but it was
Greg who found his voice.

�Leave her alone, Blaise. It�s me you�re angry with. I�m sorry I hit you.�

Blaise�s fists opened and closed repeatedly as he looked from one to the other.
Then he turned abruptly and went to the stairs as he said over his shoulder,
�Just leave, Greg. I can�t deal with you any more tonight.�

Neither spoke as they watched Blaise continue up the stairs. Then they turned
to one another, but could think of nothing to say. Ginny shook her head and
Greg breathed a deep sigh and turned to the door.

�Thanks again, Ginny. Good night.�

�Good night, Greg,� she called softly as the portrait swung closed. She stared
at nothing for a long while before she turned to go back upstairs. The sight of
Blaise looking down at her from the balcony stopped her.

His eyes blazed with anger as he hissed, �You�re stupid and wrong. Don�t ever
again try to analyze me, you little blood traitor! You have no idea what I do
or do not think. And, you most certainly have no fuckin�
clue how I feel!�

He turned and walked back to his room and she didn�t move until she heard his
door slam. She was actually very glad he hadn�t turned back to look at her,
because the sardonic smile on her face would have set him over the edge. All
she could hear in her head was a phrase Hermione used all the time, �Methinks
thou dost protest too much.� Ginny slowly went around the room lowering the
lamps as she patted herself on the back.

She had done a good job at helping Greg. It hadn�t been uppermost in her mind
at the time that she was Head Girl, but once he�d complimented her on it, she�d
realized that talking to students, like she had done with him, was now her job.
The fact that she had handled it well made her pretty proud of herself, and if
Blaise had heard enough to sneer her words back at her, then at least she�d
made some impression on him, too. His denial was proof enough that he�d at
least thought about what she�d said.

�Maybe I won�t be so bad at this Head Girl thing after all,� she smiled to
herself as she went back up to her room for that long awaited relaxing bath.

xxxxx

Chapter 25

�And, it really doesn�t bother you that she�s Head and not you?� Pansy asked in
awe. Most of her relationships had been built on necessity, bribery, or blood.
Until this year she had never had friends just because they had common
interests or shared memories. She had always assumed that all friendships were
laced with a good dose of dislike, the desire for one-upmanship, or the need to
prove oneself. The thought of Hermione not being jealous of Ginny just blew her
away.

Hermione smiled and laughed a little as she looked around the nearly empty
all-house common room, �No, Pansy. Not at all. Now, if
you had asked me before the war, then maybe, but now I just�I guess I don�t
want the responsibility.�

Pansy nodded thoughtfully, and Hermione continued her eyes unfocussed in
thought, �Gin will be great at it. She deserves it; worked hard for it. I think
I just need this year to be normal for a change. Vati says I need to learn how
to be a normal teenager; a normal girl. Every year at Hogwarts has been an
adventure, often an exercise in fear. It was always focused on Harry, Voldemort
and the war. I need time to just be me and figure out what I do now that I
don�t need to be just the strong, fearless, brainy friend of Harry Potter.�

�The brains behind the man,� Pansy smiled.

�Something like that,� Hermione laughed. �But, enough
about me. We�re supposed to be talking about you.�

Pansy blushed a bit as she asked, �Be honest with me.
Am I crazy for even thinking he would like me? I mean, it�s not like we�ve even
been friendly before.�

�The truth?� Hermione asked. When Pansy nodded, she
said, �I don�t know. I mean, nothing against you at
all. It�s just that as smart as Ron is, he isn�t the most adapt at picking up
on clues from girls. Look how long it took us to get together.�

�So what can I do?� Pansy sighed.

Hermione looked at her for a moment before she asked, �Why Ron? What do you see
in him? Know about him? What do you want from him?�

�Well, I�� Pansy started, thrown by the questions. Her eyes clouded as she
thought back on how it all began. �I guess it started because I thought he was
adorable in those ugly robes at the ball fourth year. He was so uncomfortable
and it was kind of funny, but also kind of cute. Draco kept making jokes about
the Weasleys being poor, but I just watched Ron watch
you. His eyes were so expressive, so sad; it made me want to hug him. But, I
knew it was forbidden, so I just�Well, anyway, I guess I started watching him a
lot after that. I saw he wasn�t the bumbling fool we all thought him to be.
He�s smart, and funny, loyal, caring, brave, determined, a bit of a prat sometimes, too, but what man isn�t? I knew he would
get you to go out with him eventually. Who wouldn�t want to melt into those
eyes, kiss those pouty lips, feel his��

Hermione coughed delicately to cut her off and laughed at Pansy�s immediate
blush.

�Sorry, but you asked,� she smiled. �Anyway, it was over the summer that I
guess I really started thinking about him as a possibility. I read that you two
were together and I kept telling myself to let it go. It wasn�t like I could
ever compete with you, so I just had to get over it. Plus, there was the thing
with Draco, even though we hadn�t even seen each other since the last day of
the war. But, at night, alone in my room, I would dream of him; of the
possibility of him. I would watch news reports just looking to see Ron�s name.
And, I clipped pictures from the Prophet
with him in them. I couldn�t stop myself. It gave me something to hope for, I
guess. It helped me get through the summer, through those sessions. I knew if I
could just be strong and make it through, I would get to see him again here. I
knew you two would be together, and I never had any intention of letting him,
or anyone really, know of my secret. I wouldn�t have dared try anything. Just
seeing him every day would have been enough, I thought. But, somehow in the
last three days, all that has changed. I surely never meant to blurt it out to
Harry the first night, and I��

�Harry knows?!� Hermione interrupted in shock.

�Oh, well yeah. He didn�t tell you?�

Hermione shook her head, �No. No, he didn�t. But, Harry never goes back on his
word. So, if you asked him not to��

�I did,� Pansy nodded.

�Well, there you have it,� Hermione answered.

�Wow. I just assumed he would�I mean, he�s your best friend. He doesn�t owe me
anything,� Pansy exclaimed, once again in awe.

Hermione just smiled and shrugged. �So, back to Ron.�

�Oh. Oh yeah,� Pansy grinned. �I don�t know what to do. I know I don�t
know him very well, yet, but I want to. I want to know what makes him happy and
sad. I want to see what he looks like in the morning with his hair standing on
end. I want to have dinner at his parents� house with all of his family and
have him be proud to be seen with me. I�ve never been at a family meal at my
home that wasn�t formal or alone. Ginny and Ron are so easy together, like a
family should be. And, I�I want that. I want that with him. God, Hermione,
these last few days have been a miracle. I never dared think I could be friends
with you or Ginny. I never dreamed I�d get to really spend time with Ron, but
it�s all happening. Now, I just want to know what to do to make him see me as
something other than a Slytherin or Draco�s girlfriend. How can I make him
forget that I almost got his best friend killed? How can you forget that? Will
you ever forgive me?�

By the time she was done, Pansy was a mess of tears. She looked so distressed
and defeated that Hermione reached out to hug her. �Shh,
it�ll be okay, Pansy. Come on, stop crying. That�s good. Now take a breath.
Good.�

�I feel so stupid. I�m reaching for things I shouldn�t and�� Pansy sighed as
she blew her nose. �I�m sorry.�

�Don�t,� Hermione shook her head. �You�re not stupid. Now, listen to me. I
can�t speak for Ron or Harry, although I think they would agree with me.
There�s nothing for me to forgive, Pansy. It was war. It was scary and
horrifying and we all did what we could to survive it. Everyone made mistakes,
everyone, including Harry, Ron and me. You may not have made the same decision
I would have in that moment, but it�s done. It�s over. You suffered and paid
for it. It isn�t my right or place to forgive you. The only two people who need
to forgive you are Harry and you.�

When Pansy�s eyes widened slightly, Hermione nodded, �Yes, you. You said you
want this year to be different. You want people to see you for who you are and
you want the chance to show everyone all that you can be. Well, Pansy that�s
starts with showing yourself. You have to first forgive yourself and realize
that one mistake doesn�t have to define you. I can�t promise you that everyone
will suddenly see you differently, but they will start to see that there is
more to you. Maybe, like Ginny and I did, they will give you a chance. That
includes Ron.�

�But, what if I can�t forgive myself,� Pansy whispered.

�You can,� Hermione insisted. �You just have to give yourself the same chance
you want everyone else to give you.�

�It�s not that easy,� Pansy sighed. �Every time I look at Harry, I think of
what could have happened and I��

Hermione shook her head, �But it didn�t! And, you can�t live your life with
what ifs. The reality is your actions didn�t make a difference. Harry won.
Things happened the way they were supposed to happen. Look, there are enough
people out there who are more than willing to tear you down, don�t help them;
don�t be one of them. You can forgive yourself. You won�t forget; you may still
feel badly about it at times, but Pansy, give yourself a break. You were a
scared sixteen year old and you reacted to what you saw as a chance to live,
nothing more.�

�I was a coward,� Pansy sniffled.

Hermione smiled softly, �You actually weren�t. And, anyway, that�s not a
crime.�

�It is to a Gryffindor. To Ron.�

�No, Pansy. I think people get this house thing so wrong sometimes.�
Hermione sighed, �Yes, we are better known for our bravery, but it�s not like
we were given a choice. Do you know what bravery is? It�s
love and a fear of failure. It�s knowing that if you
do nothing people, many people you love, even yourself, could die. It�s
deciding to die fighting, rather than begging and crying. It�s
knowing that if you fail, you have done so much more than simply let yourself
down. To us, cowardice was the acceptance of failure, the acceptance of the
death of your friends, and it�s simply something we couldn�t do. It�s not a
crime, Pansy, it�s just that for us, at least those of
us who fought, defeat was unthinkable. In this case, defeat meant enslavement;
and for many, like me, torture and death, painful, horrible, demeaning deaths.
Trust me; it wasn�t bravery, so much as survival. It wasn�t just Gryffindors
that showed that bravery. You did in a way. Narcissa Malfoy did. And, ��

�What?! Pansy interrupted sharply. �No, neither one of us��

�Yes, you did! As I said, bravery is love and the fear of failure. It�s
survival. You were afraid to be killed; to let down your side. You did what you
could to survive, just like the rest of us. Narcissa showed it when she lied
for Harry. She could easily have��

�She only did it for Draco,� Pansy sighed.

Hermione nodded, �That�s right; for love. She did it for his survival, for the
survival of her family. I don�t even think she realizes even now how important
her final decision was in the end. She was scared and defeated, but the bravery
she showed in those last moments was astounding.�

Both were quiet for a moment, then Pansy wiped at a tear and looked over at
Hermione, �Okay, say you�re right. What do I do now? You saw it at dinner the
other night. Others don�t see it that way.�

�You forgive yourself and you hold your head up high. You show everyone,
including yourself, another kind of bravery from here on out. You let them see
that you are who you are and that she�s not so bad. People will come around or
they won�t. You can�t control that.�

�And, Ron?� Pansy persisted.

Hermione looked down for a moment and answered, �You know, maybe you need to
just let it go for a little while. Things like this don�t happen overnight and
it seems to me, you have a lot to handle right now without adding that to it. I
mean, I think it could happen, but give it time. You haven�t figured out who
you are yet. How can Ron get to know a person even you don�t know, yet? If you
don�t like yourself, why should he?�

�I don�t hate myself,� Pansy mumbled as she fiddled with the sofa cushion.

�But, you don�t particularly love yourself either, do you?�

Pansy shrugged.

�You have to love yourself before others can love you. And, don�t you think you
deserve to be loved?� Hermione asked softly.

One shoulder lifted slightly as Pansy murmured, �Sure, I guess. Maybe.�

�You do, Pansy,� Hermione stated. She was quiet for a moment before she
continued, �That�s something it took me a while to figure out.�

Pansy turned on the sofa to look at Hermione fully, her face a mask of
confusion, �You? How could you ever doubt it? You�re Hermione Granger, the
smartest witch in a century. Look at all you�ve done; all the things you�ve
accomplished, even before the war. You�re amazing. You�re��

�A muggleborn, as Dra�Malf� he reminded me continuously. The
know-it-all. The bushy-haired, buck-toothed freak.
The girl who spends more time with her books than with real
life. I know what I am, Pansy, and if on certain days I forgot, your ex
was more than happy to remind me every chance he got.�

�He doesn�t think that way anymore,� Pansy stated.

�Maybe. We�ll see, I guess. But, it doesn�t matter
anymore, really. Too much has happened to us all to hold on to all that. What Malf�Dra�he did and said back
then are irrelevant now anyway. It�s almost as if it was from a different time.
It�s not like any of us were any nicer to him, either. And, I know he�s
suffered and changed, too. He�s learned that things aren�t always black and
white and that sometimes, he too, can be wrong. Maybe he�ll see me for me,
maybe he won�t. Either way�I think that�s part of why I liked Ron so much, you
know? He didn�t see all those things. He knew me and just saw me; I liked that.
More than I liked him, I think now.�

�So, how did you learn��

�Learn to love myself?� Hermione smiled and shrugged. �I don�t know. Honestly,
I don�t think I ever didn�t. Don�t think I was always happy with who I was, who I am, but I never hated myself for it. I
accepted myself, my limitations and my good qualities. Somewhere along the way
I learned that no matter what others might think, if I was the best me I could
be, that would be have to be enough.�

�And, you think it could happen for me, too?�

�Yes, Pansy, I do. I like what I know of you, so far. I think once you get to
know you better, you will, too.�

Pansy smiled, �Well, I hope so. And, just so you know, I like you just the way
you are.� Then she teased a little, �Now that you�ve learned to tame those
curls of yours, people can see your face; see how pretty you really are.�

Hermione laughed, �Yeah, right. Vati says she�s taking me under her wing. So,
maybe with a little makeup and a change of clothes I�ll see this person you
see.�

�Just don�t let her go too crazy,� Pansy said as she wrinkled her nose a bit.
�She can be a bit heavy-handed with the makeup wand. Honestly, Hermione, you
don�t need all that stuff. You�re gorgeous just the way you are.�

The blonde man that stood quietly beside the sofa, concealed by a
disillusionment charm, nodded in agreement. He had spied on them in hopes of
getting to know more about the woman who�d started to commandeer his every
thought. But, he�d learned more about Hermione Granger in those few quiet
minutes than he�d ever hoped to learn. Whatever doubts he�d had about his
changed feelings toward her had dissipated as she�d quietly talked to his
ex-fianc�e. She�d shown more compassion and understanding than he�d ever seen,
even extending it to him and his mother in their absence. He�d always known
that his taunts had hurt her; that had been his aim. He�d tried to break her
spirit and pride, as she�d unknowingly broken his time and time again. His
guilt ate at him as he�d spied on their conversation and mentally relived the
many ways he�d tried to crush her. For the first time in his life, Draco was
proud of having failed at something. He smiled to himself as he realized he hadn�t
broken her.

As quietly as he�d come, he turned away and made his way out of the room. He
headed towards the library, supremely unconcerned about lateness of the hour.
He didn�t intend to get caught, so he wouldn�t; what he suddenly needed to do
couldn�t wait a moment longer. It was time to do what he�d avoided during his
long torturous summer. He was going to go read up on trials, tribulations,
truths and pains of one Ms. Hermione Granger. He needed to get to know her and
the first step to doing that was to understand her.

xxxxx

A couple of week later Parvati awoke on the morning
of September 19^th and hurried out of bed and down the steps to get
everything ready before Hermione woke up. She didn�t have a lot of time; she
knew her roommate never slept in long. It was Hermione�s birthday and Parvati
had been planning things for a week, ever since Ginny had reminded them all
that it fell on a Saturday. As her wand flew around and small decorations began
to fill the common area in their dorm, she thought back to that conversation
when everyone had been in the all-house common room studying when Hermione had
gotten up to get another book for her research.

Ginny then leaned in conspiratorially, �We should do something big for
her birthday next week.�

Pansy�s eyes widened, �When is it?�

�Next Saturday,� Ginny answered.

Theo had smiled, �Well, then yes. I understand turning eighteen is a big thing
in the muggle world.�

�Yeah, it is,� Ron mumbled. �But, she�s turning nineteen.�

Greg frowned, �I didn�t know that.�

Pansy smiled at him and then turned back to Ginny, �So, assuming by the look on
Ro�Ron�s face, her eighteenth wasn�t all that it should have been, what with
the war and everything, maybe we should make this one something to remember.�

Everyone nodded, but the conversation had ended when Ginny whispered, �Here she
comes. We�ll talk about it more later.�

For the remainder of the day they�d passed ideas and notes to each other as
they tried to plan a surprise for Hermione. Draco had surprised them all in
Muggle Studies when he�d quietly suggested they might want to do something
purely muggle, like get permission to go off-grounds to a muggle event or
something. When pressed for more ideas he�d clammed up and looked away, and
left the rest of the planning to them. It hadn�t been until after dinner that
the plans had been finalized and Harry had gained permission for them to all go
from the Headmistress. He�d also spread the word that more people could join
them.

Now that the day was upon them, Parvati found she was just as excited about
their evening as she hoped Hermione would be. She and her sister had been very
privileged growing up. They had travelled extensively and seen most of the
world, but only the magical world. Padma had read a
lot of stories about the muggle world and told her of them, but it had never been
either of their desire to seek out any muggle entertainment. Now, faced with
the chance to see things she�d only heard of, she was almost giddy with anticipation.

Just as she finished the last of the decorating, a soft knock came at the door.
She hurried to it and heard the giggles before she even got it opened.

�Quiet,� she whispered as the girls piled into the room, �she�ll hear you.�

Ginny rolled her eyes and muttered a muffliato before
she turned to Parvati with a raised brow and a laugh, �Forget you�re a witch?�

Parvati grinned as she nodded, �Guess I�m too excited to think clearly.�

�Same here! I could barely sleep,� Pansy laughed. �This is going to be so much
fun!�

Millicent harrumphed and sat heavily on the sofa, �She�s not kidding. She was up
all night jawing about it. Sheesh. You didn�t even make coffee? How�s a person supposed to be
civil, much less cheery at this hour?�

Padma and Susan came through the door carrying trays,
�We�ve got it. And, muffins, too.�

Millicent immediately reached for the pot, but Lavender admonished, �No, not
until she wakes up!�

Ginny stepped across the quickly filling room to Parvati, �The room looks
great. Good job with everything.�

�Thank you,� she smiled back. �So, is everything set for the rest of the day?�

�Yep, the boys and everyone else are meeting us in front of the Great Hall in
an hour, and Professor McGonagall arranged the carriages to take us to the
gates. From there, we apparate to my house and her parents will meet us there.�
Ginny laughed. �She�s going to be so surprised!�

�I think I heard her alarm!� Pansy squealed and ran to the bottom of the
stairs. �Yeah, she�s moving around up there.�

All of the women in the room took their positions, even Millicent, who grumbled
about how stupid it all was. No one responded to her, as they�d come to realize
that her snarky comments rarely meant anything. She seemed to express joy and
sorrow the same way, with sarcasm. The small smile on her face as she vanished
her decorations and then herself, let them know of her
excitement anyway.

Parvati placed herself on the sofa in the now �empty� room and reached for her
cup of coffee just as Hermione emerged from the bathroom and looked down over
the railing.

�Good morning. You�re up early,� she said around a yawn as she made her way
down the stairs.

Parvati nodded in greeting and smiled, but didn�t trust herself to speak
without squealing.

Hermione didn�t notice as she reached the bottom of the steps and stretched,
�Any more coffee?�

Parvati nodded and indicated the pot on the table. She watched until Hermione
reached the right spot and then screamed, �Happy birthday!�

Before Hermione could recover from Parvati�s shout, the rest of the women and
all the decorations appeared all around her. She squealed and jumped almost a
foot off the ground when everyone screamed, �Surprise!�

It took Hermione a moment to realize what was happening as everyone swarmed her
and congratulated her on her birthday. As soon as she figured it out she smiled
hugely, even as tears slid down her face, �Thank you!�

Hugs were exchanged as the coffee and muffins were quickly passed out and
consumed. Throughout, Hermione was told that there was a lot more surprises in
store for her day, but she couldn�t pry any specific information out of them.
She was laughingly sent back upstairs to shower and get changed, and told to
dress comfortably. Parvati had already packed her other outfit for their day,
and went to grab both of their bags while everyone else left to get their
things and meet downstairs.

xxxxx

Author�s Responses: Thank you. Muchas Gracias. Danke. Merci. Ringraziarla. Спасибо. 谢谢

Twilight_Dragon: Stick with it,
hon. No worries on the Blaise/Hermione front. lol Sorry you get so annoyed by
the books and movies and stories putting Draco in a bad light, but�well�he was
a bad character. Ha ha ha I
hope you stay with me and enjoy this story though. I love inadaze22, too, but
we all can�t write like she does. :-)

Dreamweaver: Aww, did I make you cry again?! Thank you, uh, I mean,
sorry! ;-) And, at least I got a laugh out of you when you read about any
potential Snape love. I have to tell you,� I wouldn�t have been around too long
back in the old days either. I have too much mouth. ha
ha ha Millie is not
promised to anyone, and I hope you saw in this one that there�s a bit more to
her. So, did you like the fact that Pansy�s comments got Hermione talking about
Draco (at least a little) and Draco to spy on them? And, the affects of the
upcoming day on Blaise will�well�his day is coming. ;-) I don�t know when my
next trip to Australia will be, but I do hope to get there again soon. I�ve
been to Cairns and Sydney, but that�s all so far. Still loads to see� Hugs to
you!

margaritama:
I am so glad someone mentioned the �opening telephone sequence of gossip!� When
I was in school that was the most effective way of getting information around
and I figured it would still be. Thank you! I am also really glad you enjoyed
Ginny, Pansy and Draco�s actions. They all needed to be broken down completely
before they could be built back up. Thank you!
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Struggling Through New Beginnings