Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Survivor's Guilt	By : SpeedyTomato Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Lucius Views: 34080 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 4
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter nor do I make any money of this dark dance of Harry Potter fanfic.

Chapter List
- 24
- 25
- 26
Chapter 25

Beta'd by the amazing Tenchi. Thanks, Tenchi, you're the best!

“This is all your fault, boy!” Vernon shouted, shaking a finger at Harry, face red. Huffing, he was about to go on a tirade when he was stopped.
“That's enough, dad,” Dudley told him, voice a deadly whip crack in the air. Stepping in front of his father's wheelchair, he looked down at the man, arms folded over his chest. “Harry had nothing at all to do with this. It's not his fault and you can't blame it on him.” He had known going in this wasn't going to go well, the reason he had put off telling them about him and Charlie. For months now, he intended to tell them and set out to do that many times, but each time he did, he backed out of it. It was something he didn't want to face, that's all there was to it. Now was the time, though. It was the week before Christmas and they had plans. So, the confrontation had to come.
Leaning against the wall, arms folded over his chest, Harry just looked at Uncle Vernon then to a pale, shaking Aunt Petunia, saying nothing. He had known this was coming, that's for damned sure, but Dudley had asked him to come for moral support, so he was here. It was something he didn't like, though.
Sputtering, Vernon looked between the two young men then snarled, “It is too! His freakish ways contaminated you, making you think this is normal or right! I knew something like this would happen when we let him stay.”
“Stop it!” Dudley bellowed, going red in the face. Looking at the stunned looks on his parents faces, he snarled, “It is not! You know what? I thought I was the freak for most of my life! I've known since I was a kid, dad. With how everyone was, I wasn't going to say anything. I hated myself for it. Let me tell you, I tried everything in the world to be normal and like girls. It just didn't happen. So, I faked it. That didn't work either. I just don't like girls, dad. That's all there is to it.”
“Dudders, maybe it's just that you haven't found the right one is all,” Petunia said, sputtering slightly, eyes overly wide. “I mean, when you find the right one, you'll know.”
“Yeah, quit hanging out with the freak and his friends and you might,” Vernon blustered, glowering at Harry.
“No,” Dudley said firmly, shaking his head. “I don't like them that way, that's all there is to it. They are wonderful friends and all that, but that's not where my interest is. I like men. I've known forever and just couldn't tell you.” Stiffening up, firm look on his face, he snarled, “And, you know what? Those freaks, as you call them? They are the only ones that accept me for who I am and it doesn't matter! I've lost all kinds of friends over this through the years and quit telling anyone because of it. Harry is the first one I've told in years and the only one that hasn't made any kind of big deal about it. He's accepted it for what it is and doesn't care. Hell, their kind doesn't care! It's accepted and considered normal! It's people like both of you that's made it hard for me to tell anyone! I knew this would come if I did. I'm to the point I don't care, though. You accept it or you don't. If you can't, it's your problem. It'll just mean you're excluded from a large part of my life.” Stopping, he softened his voice and added, “I don't want that. I want you in my life and to see that I'm finally happy. I'll accept it and press on if you can't though. What you think about it isn't going to change anything.”
Sputtering, looking at his wide-eyed wife, Vernon rounded on Harry then snarled, “I suppose you're one of the faggots too, aren't you, boy? Filled his head with all this shite about how there's nothing wrong with it.”
Looking at Vernon, keeping a neutral expression on his face, Harry replied, softly, “No, I'm not. I'm bisexual, like most Witches and Wizards. And that was something Dudley didn't know until after he told me about his sexual orientation.”
Rolling his chair closer to Harry, Vernon shouted, “I knew it! Being around you all his life did this to him!”
“Enough!” Dudley roared, going purple in the face. “Do not blame this on Harry! I've gotten more support from him than I ever did from either of you on the topic! All I ever heard from both of you is how sick gays were. He's the only one, ever, to not judge over it and that it didn't matter to. He's it! Until I met his friends. They are better than anyone I know about it!”
“Get away from him, and his lot, and you'll stop being this way,” Vernon roared, slamming a fist down on the arm of his wheelchair.
“No!” Dudley snarled back, hands dropping to his sides, fists clenched. “I won't! I adore being around his friends! That's how I met Charlie. If you don't like it, that’s your problem, dad, not mine. He's in my life and going to stay. We both like it that way. If I have to do without you, that's fine. I'll move on from there.” Stopping, he glared at his parents then waited.
“Dudders, please don't do this!” Petunia begged, wringing her hands, looking between her son and Harry, not sure what to say. “You're all we'll ever have.”
“It's your choice, not mine, mum,” Dudley told her softly. “You won't get grandchildren from me, but you have a chance to be something like that with Harry's godson. Draco's son is great as well. You can there. It's your choice, though. You accept it or you don't.” Shaking his head, he sighed, “I'm happy. I'm around people that accept me for the first time in my life, even knowing I like men. I like it. It's better than that stupid game of trying to save face. I can't do that anymore. I won't give up Charlie just to appease you. I won't go back to living a lie when being who I am is far better. That's what this is about, not either of you.”
Shaking his head, glaring at Harry, Vernon snarled, “I blame you for this, boy!”
“Blame me all you want,” Harry told him softly, shaking his head. “I really don't give a damn what you think anymore Uncle Vernon. I have enough problems in my life that you don't matter. And if you're stupid enough to let this ruin the relationship with your son, the only person you have to blame is the one you look at in the mirror.”
“Don't lecture me, boy,” Vernon snarled, rolling closer to him.
“I'm not,” Harry told him with a shrug. “It's your choice, Uncle Vernon. Not mine. I had nothing to do with it. I wasn't around enough to influence him one way or another. And, at the times I was, I was interested in only a couple people. Both of those were girls. So, it didn't come from me. If you find it easier to lay it on me, fine. There is no one to blame for it. Keep it up and I'm sure he's going to find plenty to blame you for.” Stopping, Harry lifted his chin and looked at the man, waiting.
“See? You'll poison him with those warped ideas again,” Vernon shouted, pointing at him.
“No,” Harry said, looking down, shaking his head. Taking a deep breath, he shut his eyes then opened them. Looking up, his temper, something he was far better at controlling now, came to the forefront. Eyes alight, he took a step forward then snarled, “No, Uncle Vernon, the only person who's 'poisoning' him with ideas is you. You are the one with the warped sense of what is right and wrong, not me and Dudley. Anyone different than what you perceive is the 'right' way is a freak. Well, Uncle Vernon, you're the freak. You're a narrow-minded bigot of the first order. You just don't like it that your son is now one you label as a 'freak'. All along it's been you and Aunt Petunia that are the freaks with your narrow-minded ways. Everyone but you saw that. Only a freak would lock a child in a cupboard for years as a room. Only freaks would starve them because of a jealously carried over about my mother. My mother and father died to protect me. They loved me just how I was. I guess you don't feel the same way about your son because he's a freak now, too.”
Hands flying to her mouth, Petunia's eyes widened at that. Sputtering, she said, “You have it wrong!”
“No, I don't,” Harry said, rounding on her. “You are both the freaks. Rather than accept that not everyone adheres to your narrow-minded version of the world, you label them. You blamed me for everything, though it wasn't my fault. I came home from school year after year to this crap from you after facing horrors you can only imagine. I watched people die in a war with another narrow-minded bigot who only wanted everyone to see the world his way and that the rest were freaks who should be done away with. And those freaks were people like you; Muggles. You may not be the mass murdering psychotic he was, but your views are the same kind. In fact, he went down the path he did because of Muggles just like yourselves, that treated him like a freak. It's the same kind of bigotry you're showing and a fear of what you don't understand. That’s all it is.”
Stepping right in front of Uncle Vernon, he put his hands on the arms of the man's wheelchair and looked him dead in the eye then said, “And, just so you know, Uncle Vernon? You happen to think the 'freak' that is my boyfriend is wonderful. You've met him several times and like him.” Straightening up and backing away, Harry folded his arms over his chest and glared at the two then said, “Know what? You're both pathetic. That's all there is to it. It must be miserable to be as rigid and narrow-minded as you are. Thankfully, Dudley isn't that way. If you can't accept that it's a man that makes him happy, the problem lies with both of you. All of us who like him don't care. He's good just how he is. Who he is happens to be all that matters to us, not what sex he prefers. It's a non-issue. You're the ones making it an issue. He's still Dudley, the same son you've always had. All he's doing is telling you something you didn't know. If you can't accept it, the failing is on your end, not his. I don't want anything to do with either of you and rightly don't give a rats arse if we ever repair the relationship. As far as I'm concerned, if I ever see you again, it's too soon. You've destroyed it with me and I'm going to make no effort to fix it. If you want to, it will come from your end. And now, you're starting to do the same thing with your son.” Glaring at both of them, he added, “And, if anyone is to 'blame' for this, it would be both of you. After all, you're the ones that raised him this way.” Stopping, he stepped back and leaned against the wall, glaring at him.
Looking at his cousin, Dudley grinned and gave him a thumbs up. That was perfect. Snickering, he said, “And if he heard you call him your 'boyfriend' he would huff at you!”
Grinning a little, Harry shrugged, “True, but that's the term.”
“True!” Dudley said, grinning bigger. Letting the grin fade out, he looked at his parents and added, “Harry's right.” Shaking his head, he sighed, “I didn't want to fight with you about this, but I knew it would come. I had hoped, because it was me, you would accept it and move on. Apparently not. That's fine. I don't care. It hurts, but I'll move on. You can both see yourselves out.” Looking at Harry, he said, “Let's go find something to do.” Seeing his cousin nod, he motioned him to follow, knowing this was a way to get his parents moving in one direction or the other.
“Dudley, wait,” Petunia said, wringing her hands. “Let's talk this out.”
Turning around to face her, Dudley said, “There is nothing to talk out, mum. I've said what I had to say, so it's up to you to either accept it or not. You can blame whoever the hell you want for it, but it's not going to change the fact that I’m a faggot, as dad calls them. And, know what? I like it this way.”
Looking between the huffing, red Vernon and her son, Petunia didn't know what to do. This was her only child, one she loved with all her heart. Shaking her head, she said, “Please, Dudley, give us some time.”
“Why do you need time?” He asked. “You either accept it or you don't. All you ever told me was that you wanted the best for me and for me to be happy. I am. I have the best man in the world and he loves me. He treats me wonderfully. Charlie wants nothing at all from me. All he wants is that we're together and have fun. That's all. Everything else doesn't matter, including the fact that I was a miserable bratty oik that his family couldn't stand when I was growing up. He's even gotten over the fact that I treated Harry like shite. That says a lot about him.”
“Dudley, this is hard, you need to understand that. We had so many hopes for you,” Petunia sighed.
“Hopes for me or you, mum?” Dudley asked, quietly, looking at her. “The only thing you're not going to get is grandkids, that's all. The rest—I mentioned that and it's what I have. This affects nothing but me having kids. I don't see how I'm dashing any hopes there.” Stopping, he looked at the two then shook his head. Nothing was going to be resolved tonight, he knew that. Looking at Harry, he asked, “Can you take me to the pitch so I can swat some balls around? I think that'd do me some good right now. Mum and dad know the way out.”
“Sure, Dudley, come on. Grab your CDs and we'll play some good music while you do,” Harry said, pushing off the wall. Glaring at his aunt and uncle, he shook his head then walked over to Dudley, putting a hand on his back and leading them out to the backyard so they could Apparate away.

Sitting in the top box of the stadium with Lucius, watching Dudley smacking the quaffles into the rings while riding with Charlie, AC/DC blaring out of the speakers, Harry sighed. “It wasn't pretty,” he told the man softly.
Putting a hand on Harry's shoulder and giving it a squeeze, Lucius shook his head. “If what I've heard about them from both of you is correct, I imagine it wasn't. As you said, though, it's their loss, not Dudley's.” Stopping, he thought it over then asked, “Do you think they'll come around?”
Looking down, Harry's brow furrowed as he pondered that then said, “Probably. They are so wrapped up in Dudley, on so many levels, that they will. I don't think they can live without him, actually. It's just going to take time.”
“Maybe I should send Draco over to give them a good lecture on what is normal and what isn't,” Lucius suggested.
“Though that would be a right riot to watch, I don't think it's a good idea, Lucius,” Harry told him, chuckling softly. “With the state they're in, and how they are looking to blame 'freaks', he'd get in trouble with the Ministry for hexing the shite out of them, even though it'd be justified.”
“There is that,” Lucius said, scratching his chin. “Draco doesn't deal well with narrow-minded fools.”
“And they don't get any more narrow-minded than my aunt and uncle,” Harry sighed, shaking his head.
“Maybe Dudley should come stay with us tonight. It'll give him someone to talk to if he needs it,” Lucius suggested.
“He's going to stay with Charlie. I think that'll help more,” Harry told him, watching the two zoom down the field after the quaffle. “It'll give him the support he needs there. Probably better than we could.”
“Very true,” Lucius said with a nod. Staying quiet as he watched the two, he then asked, keeping his voice low, “How is he going to take this and how's it going to affect him?”
“That I don't know,” Harry shrugged, shaking his head. “Dudley's grown up, a lot. This is a big blow, though. It's going to affect him some. Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia have always been there for him through everything. He's self-sufficient, no doubt, but it's going to cause problems. Best we can do, I think, is just keep pressing forward. We just keep moving with the plans and go from there. Like with Christmas Eve. We'll all be over like we planned. I'll just take him with me to the Weasley's on Christmas day then over to your place. That way he won't be alone.”
“Yes, that's a good plan,” Lucius nodded. “We'll make sure we do something with him.” Nudging Harry, he asked, smirking slightly, “You did get your hands on his present like you said you were, right?”
Grinning, Harry nodded, “I got it. Charlie has it shrunken and hidden at his place. He'll bring it with him Christmas Eve.”
“That will greatly improve his mood,” Lucius smirked.
“It will,” Harry laughed. Shaking his head, Harry sighed, “It just sucks is all. I figured it was coming, but I hoped that they would surprise me with their acceptance of it.”
Shaking his head, Lucius didn't know what to add to that. Instead, he put a hand on Harry's shoulder and gave it a squeeze.

Sitting on the balcony of Harry's room when they got home, the two were winding down before bed as they always did. Just as they were finalizing plans for the week on what they needed to finish, Harry's mobile went off.
Picking it up, brow furrowed, Harry looked at the number then rolled his eyes and tossed it on the small table in front of them. Shaking his head, he said, “It's Aunt Petunia. I'm not answering that.”
An evil smirk crossing his face, Lucius told him, smoothly, “I will.”

Chuckling, shaking his head, the younger man told him, “Have at it! This should be funny!”
Snatching the phone off the table, Lucius answered, putting it on speaker phone so Harry could hear, “Can I help you?”
“Um—is Harry there?” Petunia asked, bewildered. “And who is this?”
“This is Lucius. Harry is here, but doesn't wish to converse with you right now. I believe being called a freak repeatedly tonight has put him off slightly.”
Sighing, Petunia asked, “Lucius, do you know where Dudley is? We've been trying to call him since we left and can't get an answer.”
“I believe your son is rather put out with you as well, Mrs. Dursley,” Lucius told her smoothly, smirking bigger. “Can't say I blame him, really. However, we've seen Dudley and he's safe. He's staying with his boyfriend tonight. I doubt he'll answer his mobile there, if the signal will get through the magic that is.”
“I understand,” she told him dejectedly. “If he calls, will you tell him his father and I have been trying to get in touch.”
“Actually, no, I won't, Mrs. Dursley,” Lucius told her, lifting his nose. “I'm a freak and I don't believe that is my place to do so.”
Petunia didn't know what to say to that, sighing.
“If I may, Mrs. Dursley, from one parent to another—I believe it's time for you and your husband to pull your heads out of where they’re firmly lodged and smarten up a tad. He's your son. The only one you'll ever have. You have him and your nephew, that's all. Do you truly want to be alone for the rest of your life without them because of an out-dated prejudice that is just foolish? That is what you're facing and you have brought it on yourself. He is your child. The fact he's happy is all that should matter to you. Your nephew, as I can damned well guarantee, is the only reason you have your miserable lives. Yet you turn your back on them, both. It is foolish, bigoted reactions such as this that allows so many in our world to foster on the prejudices against your kind. That breeds contempt. Contempt breeds hateful behavior. Albeit, your own hateful behavior is no better.” Lowering his voice, he said, “And, just to be clear here; I’m your nephew's significant other. I don't take kindly to being called a freak, Mrs. Dursley. You can pass that tidbit of information along to your husband.”
Sucking in her breath, Petunia managed to utter, “You're Harry's boyfriend?”
“I prefer the term significant other, Mrs. Dursley,” Lucius huffed, rolling his eyes. “I don't believe, as I'm older than you and your husband, both, the term 'boy' applies here. And, yes, I am. Let me tell you this, Mrs. Dursley; I am a widower that loved my wife dearly. I have a son I'm extremely proud of who managed to become a Healer despite grievous mistakes both he and I made many years ago. I'm also a grandfather of a wonderful little boy. There is also the fact that I am wealthier than you and your husband could ever dream of. I could buy and sell you many times over, easily. As could your nephew, I might add here. Just because I now choose to be in a relationship with a man does not make me a freak and the word faggot is highly offensive. If my son chose to be in a relationship with a man, it wouldn't turn my nose up. He is my son and I would love him no matter what. I have stuck by him in more ways than you will ever know, as your nephew can attest to. The fact that parents are willing to turn their back on their son just because he fancies the same sex is unfathomable to me. It also doesn't reflect well on your parenting skills that you would do such a thing.”
“You raised him, Mrs. Dursley, you and your husband. There was no influence from 'freaks' about his sexuality. I'm sure he heard plenty of chapter and verse recitations of how you feel on the topic of gays. That would be the influence in his life, not your nephew, who you made sure he had plenty of contempt for. No, Mrs. Dursley, go look in the mirror. You didn't fail, your son is not a freak, it is the person reflected back to you that is the problem in this situation. The only people you are hurting, aside from a son who loves you, is yourselves. I would think that over before you let an outdated prejudice cloud your judgment. Now, as Harry has had a rather trying night in dealing with your foolishness, I'm going to bid you goodbye. I would rather spend time with him so he is relaxed than I would trying to pound common sense into someone that seems to have about as much of it as a paving stone. Good evening, Mrs. Dursley.” With that, Lucius hung up and tossed the phone on the table. Leaning back, he smirked, looking at Harry.
Grinning from ear to ear, Harry chuckled, then said, “They would have probably rather dealt with Draco, than you! That was great, Lucius!”
“It was, wasn't it?” Lucius said smugly, smirk growing.
“I knew there was a reason I adore you more every day,” Harry laughed.
“What is not to adore?” Lucius asked innocently, eyes sparkling slightly.
Leaning over, Harry kissed him softly, “True. I'm finding more each day I do.” Quietly, he added, “Thanks, Lucius.”
Kissing him back, Lucius stroked a finger down Harry's face when they broke it off and said, “Nothing to thank me for. I do adore giving idiots the business. It was rather enjoyable as I haven't had a chance to do that for a while.” Smiling at Harry, he said, “Let's retire and relax. We have to go out among the masses again tomorrow and brave shopping hell.”
Standing, Harry stretched then said, “Let me find the bathroom first and I'll be ready.” Smiling at the man, he walked off.
Finishing the last of his tea, Lucius looked over to the darkened park across the street and smiled himself. This was good.
- 24
- 25
- 26
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Survivor's Guilt