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Twenty Ways to Catch a Weasley	By : FairlightMuse Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Ginny Views: 16450 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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* Wow, I finally got this chapter written, revised, re-edited, re-written again, re-edited again, and then typed in. I apologize if this chapter doesn't seem to follow along the same lines. . .I wrote most it while at the laundromat and did not have the rest of the story with me. I thought it was such a cool idea, but it may seem to everyone else that there was a deep end somewhere, and I plunged off into it head first!*

Dragon34-He is worried because he never intended to spend this much time and effort on a woman. He grumbles about her being worth it, but she is. He is just too ornery to admit it!

Dracosbitch-I know, I can't imagine being in a situation like that! embarrassing? I would probably slink away. . .humiliated.
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What came next was one of those examples of how for some people there is no such thing as a lucky break. Snape and Ginny had finished their lunch, and left the restaurant in the middle of an animated discussion on the proper way to handle Cornish Pixies. Ginny was attempting to reason that the old methods were outdated, and Snape was saying that it was a moot point; after all, who fought Cornish Pixie's anymore?

Ginny, exuding passion for the subject, had turned so that she was facing him, and walking backwards down the street. They continued their discussion thus, with her glancing back every so often to check the path, and him occasionally reaching out and nudging her out of the way of an oncoming post or pedestrian.

From Pixies, they leapt verbally to Banshees, and Ginny had just opened her mouth to agree that Lockhart had been an idiot, but his articles about Banshees were undeniably accurate, when she collided into someone who had walked unexpectedly from a side alley.

The impact drove her into Snape, who had to flail wildly to maintain his balance.

" Excuse me! " she had laughed, after righting herself, turning to apologize sheepishly to her victim, but whatever excuse she had been about to offer died on her lips when she found herself face to face with Cusp.

" Excuse me. " she said again, coolly. " I did not mean to-"

" Didn't mean to what, Weasley?" Adrien demanded. " You have already ruined my lunch, and insulted my date with your uncalled for and childish behavior; why wouldn't you want to knock me onto the street and trample me to death as well?''

Ginny heat rising to her face, and instinctively took a step closer, her hand already wrapped around her wand. Snape, who had not overheard Cusp's low remark, saw Ginny's movement, and seized her elbow reflexively.

" Let go of my arm, Severus." she said, calmly.

" No need to be rude. " Snape said, his tone even and low. " Mr. Cusp, we meet again."

Adrien gave a derisive snort.

" I wouldn't say that. " he retorted.

" You never were very articulate." Snape replied.

" And you are no longer my Professor. "

" The blessings I have accumulated today continue to grow."

" I have no intention of allowing myself, or my date, to be insulted by you. . .or this little. . .tart." Adrien's voice went up almost an entire octave.

" Adrien, you always were delusional." Ginny said, and made to step around him.

He put out his hand and pushed her back, using the tip of one finger, which he hastily wiped on his immaculate robes.

" Delusional? Maybe. But I suppose it's better than being you. I would have thought you to be different."

" If I remember correctly, Adrien, you always did assume a lot of things about me that were incorrect." Ginny practically spat now, trying to free her elbow from Snape's grip.

" It's nice to see you have gotten over your frigidity. Now you'll shag anyone? Or anything, if I may correct myself? You know he is a filthy Death Eater? How poor are you these days, that you have to go wallowing so low for a galleon? "

" Fucking bastard!" Ginny said, but before the words were out of her mouth, she was shoved violently to the side, as Snape leapt across the small amount of atmosphere between himself and the now screeching Cusp. A small crowd of people had gathered to watch as the older wizard, easily recognized by many of them, seized the younger man by the lapels and slammed him against the wall of the wand maker's shop.

Ginny now had her wand out, and she turned on the crowd, as well as the curious shopkeeper who dared to peek out.

" Why don't you go about your own business? " she yelled, and a few of the onlookers hurried off to watch from a safer distance.

" I would believe. . ." Snape was purring poisonously, his great hawk-like nose almost touching Adrien's pointy little beak. " That an apology to Miss Weasley is in order."
" Apologize to her then. I'm not the one who publicly humiliating her."

" Actually you are." Ginny said.

Snape flicked his eyes to her briefly, asking her silently to allow him the honor. She acquiesced graciously, curious to see how her new lover was going to handle her ex-fiance.

" Apologize to Miss Weasley." Snape said again.

" Or what? You'll take me to Voldemort?" Adrien hissed.

" I can't imagine why he would want a piddling little Hufflepuff like yourself."

" Bringing school animosities into it, Snape? " Cusp laughed.

" You were the one who brought your lunch into it.If I didn't know any better, I would say that you arranged this little collision for the sole purpose of antagonizing us. Of course that would be giving you entirely too much credit, wouldn't it? "

" Get your hands off of me. "

" What's going on here? Ginny?" Ginny glanced back over her shoulder, to see George standing nearby. Further down the road, Fred was standing in the doorway of '' Weasley's Wizard Wheezes'', squinting down the street to see what the commotion was about.

Ginny gave a little shrug.

" I think Severus is going to kill Adrien.." she said matter-of-factly.

" Oh, jolly. Fred! Close up the shop for a half hour. Snape is going to murder Adrien Cusp!"

" Wicked! I always wanted to do that myself." Fred called back.

" Adrien Cusp?" asked a dumpy grey haired woman standing in the crowd of onlookers. " I know you! You're the one who got my husband arrested for black-marketeering. Hah! That was before yourself got demoted. Go on, kill him then, I won't shed a bloody tear."

" Looks like you are awfully popular these days." Ginny laughed. She could see though that Snape was desperately struggling with his temper. He no doubt wanted to break Adrien's neck, and Ginny doubted she would have tried to stop him if he did.

But Snape had been in the world for far too long to succumb to the temptation of strangling an insolent Ministry employee, for no better reason than an insult to pride. He knew far better ways to get even, and he could see quite easily that Mr. Cusp was just the sort that would fall into that trap. . .too easily.

" You have insulted us both, Cusp. . .and if you were a man, I would challenge you to a duel. However it would be too much of an embarrassment for me to associate my name against one such as you. You probably wouldn't even appear, you cringing excuse for a man. " Snape kept his voice low and calm.

Adrien's face burned a violent shade of purplish red, and he spluttered madly for a few seconds.
" Is that so? Is that so? Well, now I am insulted Snape! And I challenge you to a duel! I dare you not to attend. . .I dare you to refuse, you sniveling coward. " Adrien's voice was neither low nor calm, and several people gasped. A duel was illegal, and therefore totally and thoroughly exciting.

" As I am the one challenged, then I have the right to name the location, the time and the weapons.." Snape said.

" Today!." Adrien countered.

" Three days. Enough time to acquire seconds and find reliable witnesses."

" Fine. Three days. " Snape released Adrien, who began brushing off his robes.

" To the death?" Snape asked, raising a brow.

Ginny opened her mouth to protest, but George placed a hand on her shoulder., and leant down far enough to whisper something in her ear.

" We'll have to Obliviate the lot of them." he said. " We can't take chances that someone might blab. "

He and Fred, who had appeared suddenly behind them nodded at each other and began to circle around the spectators.

" I. . .I suppose." Adrien faltered, suddenly seeming to recall that he this was a Death Eater that he had just challenged.

" Of course we can't use our own wands. I want blank wands from the ministry cache. " Snape suggested.

" Of course."

" We will need a location. And a time."

" I think that that lovely lakeside where you picnicked would be delightful. Such a romantic atmosphere for dueling." Adrien wrinkled his nose in distaste.

" I will owl you with the location, the time, and the name of my second. Each party should bring suitable and trustworthy, witnesses as well." Snape said.

" And Cusp. . .you might want to see that your affairs are in order. After all. . .one never knows." Snape added with a slight sneer.

" I don't believe Snape, that witnesses are necessary or-"

" Have you ever attended a duel, Mr. Cusp?"

" N-No."

" Well, I have, and I assure you, that witnesses are imperative to the fairness of the duel. Not to mention that someone needs to be responsible for the removal of the body. Now, shall we pretend for the moment that we are gentlemen?" Severus held out his hand.

Adrien hesitated. If he shook the proffered hand, then the duel would be binding. At last he raised a somewhat trembling hand and shook, briefly and with some agitation.

Then with a sneer in Ginny's direction, he flipped his robes and strode off around the corner.

Ginny glared after him for a moment. Snape was silent beside of her, reticent about facing her. He had just barely escaped being tried for the murder of Gold, and now he was willingly and perhaps foolishly thrusting himself into another situation where his life and freedom might be at stake. . He didn't know what had made him agree, what had possessed him to suggest such a thing as a duel to Cusp.

Maybe it was the conversation about Lockhart that had subconsciously brought to surface the memory of how good it felt to duel with and beat a fool, but most likely it was the look of angered hurt on Ginny's face when Adrien had insulted her so strongly. He had never felt the desire to come to the defense of a woman before and he took a few moments to savor the feeling of honest nobility the gesture had brought about. It felt, he decided at last. . . bloody good.

At last he dared a peek at her, sideways, not knowing what to expect. Would she be furious with him for this new folly?

She didn't look furious. She looked as if she had just won a million galleons.

'' You are going to duel. . ." she said softly. " For me. . .or for you?"

" For both of us. " he said honestly.

She nodded.

The twins appeared again, pocketing their wands.

" That was brilliant mate. " Fred said.

" You know how much I value your opinion." Snape answered sarcastically, and was rewarded with a healthy clap on the back from George.

" Oh come on now. And after we Obliviated all of your witnesses too. But no need to thank us."

" And please, even though I know how desperately you want to, don't embrace us here on the street." said Fred.

" I will try to restrain myself." Snape said.

" And please don't do us the honor of asking either of us to be your second. " said George.

" Noooo... We have nothing against doing business with you, and you are a fantastic kisser. . . but getting ourselves hexed for you is a different bowl of pea soup."

" Right you are Fred. Sorry mate, sorry Ginny, but we are much too young, much too handsome and much too popular to get killed this year."

" Are you really suggesting that Adrien Cusp has a chance of winning?" Ginny demanded hotly.

Fred held up his hands in sign of truce.

" No, I wouldn't dare to imply such a notion while the two of you were facing me...but I am certain that one of his pasty little friends will be too eager to turn you all in to the Ministry after he loses."

" So good luck, it has been lovely to know you both, but I am sure that somewhere out there is a disgustingly noble person who won't hesitate to be your second. " George added.

The two young men bowed with identical flourishes and Apparated themselves back down the street to their shop, leaving behind them their sister, their ex-Potions Master, and a quickly dispersing huddle of befuddled looking pedestrians that couldn't quite recall why they had all been standing together in a group.
Snape gave a great sigh of irritation at the events of the day, and began to walk, in the opposite direction of the one Cusp had taken. Without a word, Ginny fell into step beside him, holding her head proudly erect.

" Well? " Snape demanded after a few paces." Aren't you going to say anything?"

" Yes. I think you should have just choked him to death."

" I could have hardly justified such a brash action."

" There was no justification for his behavior."

" I have still have the strangest suspicion that our confrontation with Mr. Cusp this afternoon was not entirely an accident."

" Of course it wasn't. He must have excused himself from the restaurant, and ran through the alley with every intention of confronting us."

" Insane."

" Jealous, probably."

Snape's lips tightened a little in anticipation of her explanation. When it did not come, he gave her an impatient look and urged her to go into more detail, citing that it was only reasonable for him to want to know what sort of a man he was up against.

" Not much of a man at all. I suppose I should be completely honest with you on a certain matter."
She had been unaware that he was holding her hand, until his grip tightened almost painfully. She glanced up at his face but it was, as usual, completely expressionless.

" I would appreciate the gesture." he said stiffly.

" I was engaged to him." she said bluntly.

His grip became as unbearable as a steel trap, but she did not complain. She wondered if maybe she should have mentioned this earlier? Of course, she really couldn't think of a time when blurting out a list of her former lovers would have made for enjoyable conversation.

" Engaged."

" Yes, rather impulsively. I was escaping from Mi-, well, from a bad relationship, and I thought that Adrien was a sympathetic and sensitive person."

" Disappointed?"

" Oh my assumptions were correct. However I learned quickly that I have no use for snivelly, '' senstive '' boys that go crying to mother anytime I raise my voice." she pulled a comical face, suggesting severe distaste. " Honestly, he made me have the intense urge to vomit, so I disposed of him in a pub and never looked back. "

" That isn't everything." he observed. He had noted with ease how quickly she glossed over the last tidbit.

At his words, she shot him a piercing look, as if trying to discern whether he had heard all of this before, from another source. When she could not detect anything but curiosity she sighed and shook her head.

" It was an ugly separation. I gave him quite a tongue lashing, in public, trying to humiliate some backbone out of him. I was rewarded with a few quick punches that I didn't see coming. I hexed him, he hexed me, we were separated forcefully by a few bystanders, and I went off to France with Hermione to seethe." she shrugged against him.

'' Bastard.''

She shot a coy look up at him from beneath her lashes.

" Angry with me?" she simpered.

" No. Why should I be?"

She jumped up and kissed his cheek, grinning broadly. He stopped walking and regarded her.

" But I want you to know that I have already decided to win this duel, so if you are expecting to get rid of me that easily, you are sorely mistaken." his lips twitched as he spoke.

" I love it when you tease me. " she kissed him again. " Hey, what was Fred on about when he said you were a good kisser?"

Snape's face flushed slightly.

" Just your brother's idea of a joke. " he coughed. " Left over from the days of perfecting the Wolfsbane potion. "

" Just wondering if perhaps I should be jealous. " she winked at him. " And what is this about doing business with them? "

" I believe that is a short story best saved for a longer day. I have a duel to prepare for, after all."

'' Right. And I will help. So what is it that we have to do first?"

" We have to locate a disgustingly noble person to be my second."

They looked at each for a moment, then with two identical nods of their heads, they both stated;

" Lupin."
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Twenty Ways to Catch a Weasley