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Numen Pumilum	By : AuctorRubra Category: Harry Potter > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 15661 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all the characters and places of Potterverse belong to the brilliant J.K. Rowling. Everything else is mine so keep your hands
off of it unless you want me to sic Severus on you!

A/N: Hey everyone! Well, the last chapter was only supposed to
be five pages long when I planned it out.
The joke was on me because it ended up being over twice that. Silly me.
To try and make up for my little lapse in sticking to the plan, this
chapter will encompass the entire month of November and time will pass rather
quickly. Angel: I�m glad that you�re so
eager to get Sirius and Eris together, I am too, but it has to take its
course. She�s going to give in to being
cozy with him real soon, but, sadly, she is not going to be honest with
him. Its all
part of the plot. Counting this chapter,
it will be about six chapters before they bond.
This is mainly due to the timing.
She�s got to be able to keep the fact that she�s pregnant a secret after
the bonding so I can�t let her get that way until early spring, otherwise
she�ll be starting to show. Please be
patient with me. I promise that their
relationship is going to get better even before the bonding. And thank you for being such a consistant viewer! I
always look forward to seeing your name pop up.
That goes for you too Nikki! I hope you all enjoyed the previous chapter
and this one as well! Read, Review, and
Enjoy!

______________________________________________________________________

Chapter 23: Acceptance is a State of Mind

November 7^th, Friday

Nearly a
week had passed since the Halloween ball and Remus was sad to see that Eris had
pulled further away from Sirius than ever.
Sadly, she was also distancing herself from her friends so that Sirius
didn�t feel obligated to be alone. It
was a sad situation all around.
Therefore, Remus was going to try and take matters into his own
hands. So he found himself walking
slowly across the grounds with Eris by his side. They�d been moving along through the crisp
autumn air in silence for quite some time.
He liked the comfortable feeling between them.

�Eris darling, I know that there is something
specific bothering you about Sirius.
Considering how well you�ve been doing with your visits to Josie, I find
it hard to believe that this is entirely to do with Lucius Malfoy�s
actions.� He eyed Eris carefully as she
geared up for her response.

�There are too many strings attached, Remus,�
Eris said softly.

�I don�t understand what you mean. For him or for you? Please try to explain it too me, dear,� Remus
said. �Help me to understand.�

Eris sighed and looked off towards
the Forbidden Forest. �Let it suffice to say that if I live past
the death of Voldemort I will gladly bond myself to Sirius. I�d even be willing to put up with as many
little rugrats as he could ever want. Hell, I�d probably be glad to by then.�

�So this isn�t about the children then,� Remus
asked. He�d been certain that it had
something to do with that�

�Not so much,� Eris said softly. �Though I don�t think I could bear to be
pregnant before this is all over. How
could I live with myself if something caused me to miscarry? What if I died? It would be two deaths instead of just
one. I couldn�t stand for Sirius to have
to go through that.�

�So, this mostly has to do with your fear of
the pain Sirius will go through if you die,� Remus said sagely. �You might not want to hear this, but
sometimes you simply have to live in the moment and take what life gives to you
as soon as it comes. Lily and James, may
they rest in peace, cherished each other for every moment they had once they
got passed their differences and got together.
They loved Harry for every moment they could and I know damned well that
your father thought of you every day until the day he died. You may not be pleased with their choices,
but he was my best friend and I know how he thought. You never left his mind Eris and he wouldn�t
have wished you and Harry away just because he didn�t live to see you grow.�

�This isn�t the same. They couldn�t have known their time would
come so soon��

�And neither can you,� Remus cut in gently.

Eris looked furious then. �Can�t I?
You may think not, but I am not blind or stupid and they were never
quite so deeply in the thick of things as this.
You knew my father so well so tell me this: If he had known he almost
certainly had less than a year to live would he have subjected my mother to the
pain of only having him for so short a time only to
watch him die?�

Remus grabbed Eris and pulled her
into a tight embrace. �You.
Are. Not. Going. To. Die. I love you
too much. Harry loves you too much. Merlin help him, Sirius loves you too damn
much at this point, so much so that he would probably choose to follow you.�

�Don�t say that,� Eris hissed.

�I�m saying it,� Remus growled in a low
tone. �You need to hear it and snap out
of this funk you�ve been in. You have to
open your eyes and see how much he needs you!
Its not just the bond any more, Eris. He adores you and does nothing but gaze after
you wherever you walk. He speaks of
little else than you and how he could possibly make you choose him rather than
waiting for some other choice to waltz along.
I know you have feelings for him.
Why won�t you just tell him the things you�ve told me and let him decide
for himself.�

�I will�consider it,� Eris whispered.

�You do that,� Remus said gently and leaned
over to kiss Eris on the forehead. �And
try to avoide wearing any more blood feud gowns until
you�ve decided. You�re going to make the
poor bloke�s head explode.�

He was beginning to walk away when
Eris called out to him, �Remus, I need to know�would he ever accept Severus as
part of the bargain?�

Remus� mind went blank for a
moment. He just couldn�t imagine it ever
happening�not without a good deal of negotiation along the way. Then again, Sirius seemed willing to do just
about anything for Eris. �You�ll have to
ask him that yourself, sweetie. Though I must say that there is little that Sirius wouldn�t do to
win you over.�

Hopefully his goddaughter would
think long and hard on the things they discussed.

_______________________________________________________________________

November 16^th, Sunday

Severus had been trying very hard
not to think about the possibilities of a relationship with Eris for the past
two weeks and now here was Black badgering him about it. �Why do I need to talk about this with you?�

�Because Remus seems to think that Eris and I
would be having an easier time of it if the girl thought you and I could at
least be civil to one another for extended periods of time,� Black said in a
tightly controlled tone. Severus loved
what it must be costing the man to come in here and discuss this with him. Of course, that still didn�t mean that he
actually wanted to have the conversation.

�Does he,� Severus said quietly and put down
his drink. �Do you completely understand
what Eris really wants from me, Black?
Have you divined the fact that she would want me to be an active part of
your pairing in every way? Her interest
might fade in time, but she is�infatuated with me at this point and nothing
I�ve said dissuades her.�

Black�s face was blank, but
Severus could see many emotions swirling in his grey eyes, pain and anger being
the most prominent. �She loves you. I love her.
If we were mated she would love me as well. Part of love is compromise, is it not?�

�Can you compromise enough to let you mate bed
another man,� Severus said snidely.
Perhaps he could be kinder about it, but that wasn�t the man he was.

Sirius flinched. �Triads are not unheard of in our world.�

�Amongst three people who all share a mutual
attraction for one another,� Severus snapped.
�I don�t know about you, but I for one have never felt a moment�s
attraction for another wizard, least of all you.�

�The sentiment is returned,� Sirius said with
a slight sigh. �I�m willing to at least
give it a chance if it would make her happy.
She would be my mate and my wife.
Its not as though she could just leave me for
you.�

Severus turned a piercing glare on
the other man. �Think long and hard on
this Black before you even consider promising her this. Consider the things I could and would be doing with her. Make no mistake I would enter fully into the
relationship. I care much more for the
minx than I probably should. It is not
difficult for a man with a functioning brain to become quickly enamored with
her.�

Black actually chuckled. �I agree with you on that point. There�s a good deal to love about her.�

Severus nodded. �Well, just think about it then. I am willing to do whatever it takes to make
your relationship with Eris a success, if only to see the imp settled and happy
before Voldemort boils my hide.�

Sirius frowned. �I can�t let that happen to you, mate. Eris would never recover.�

�Then let us hope that she will be so smitten
with you when the time comes that she will barely notice my passing.�

�As if that day would ever come.�

�Stranger things have happened,� Sirius said
with a small smile.

Severus quirked
a brow. �Yes, like you and I
having this conversation.�

�Exactly.�

________________________________________________________________________

November 22^nd

Eris took a deep breath as she saw
Sirius approaching the portrait hole. He
hadn�t noticed her yet and she took that moment to watch the way his hair kept
falling into his eyes. His beautiful eyes.
She loved the way they looked right now, dancing with mischief at some
joke that Draco had just told him. She
stepped forward then and grabbed him by the arm. �Sirius, could I have a word with you?�

She was happy to see that his smile didn�t
fade. �Sure, love. Shall we go for a walk to somewhere private?�

�Please.�
Eris allowed Sirius to steer her into their common room and straight for
her little side room. Once inside, Eris
cast a strong locking charm. She would
have rather taken him outside, but the ground were
currently covered with new fallen snow and she wanted to stay warm. �Please sit, Sirius. Would you like a drink?�

�Eris, I�d rather you just sit with me and
tell me what you have to say,� Sirius said gently.

Eris nodded and quickly took a
seat in the chair next to where Sirius had perched on the couch. �I need to explain something to you. There are still a lot of things that I won�t
tell you�but I need to at least give you some of it.�

�Okay,� Sirius said. He looked a bit worried. �I would really like to hear what you have to
say, sweetheart. I�ve been hoping that
you�d come to talk with me.�

Eris looked off through the window
at Draco and Harry cuddling on the couch.
She wanted that, needed it, but it would be far too selfish to take it
knowing what she knew. �Sirius, the main
reason I would prefer not to bond with you is that the position I�m in right
now is dangerous and uncertain. Anything
could happen to me. I may very well
die.�

�I can say the same thing, love,� Sirius said
softly and took her hand. �I�d rather
spend what time I have loving you if that is my fate.�

Eris smiled. �I�it makes me feel wonderful to hear you say
that, but there are things holding me back.
Sirius, I vow to you that if I live passed Voldemort�s
death that you would be the one I would choose to bond with. Its never been my
intention to search for another. I
have�feelings for you, but I have much else that I need to focus on.�

�Then accept me into your life, Eris,� Sirius
pleaded. �Bond with me and let me share
your burden the way Draco does for Harry.
The power boost alone could be vital to your success, love!�

�It is Harry�s power level alone that matters
in the end,� Eris said sternly.

�Bullshit,� Sirius snapped. �He needs you and your control! You�re a matched set and one just doesn�t cut
it without the other. The prophecy may
just be about Harry but he needs all of us to succeed.�

Eris put her head in her
hands. This wasn�t going as smoothly as
she hoped. Sirius seemed unwilling to
accept waiting. �I�m not ready for it,
Sirius! I�m not ready for that kind of
physical intimacy. I�m not sure I�m
ready for the emotional intimacy. We�ve
discussed this!�

�We don�t need to have sex to bond,� Sirius
spat. �Harry and Draco still
haven�t. If you�re going to have this
discussion with me then at least be honest with me. Hell, be honest with yourself. Until you can sit down and tell me straight
out why you won�t be with me I don�t want to hear it.�

Sirius stood up then and stormed
from the room, ripping through her locking charm along the way. Eris was so busy weeping into her hands that
she didn�t realize that Severus was with her until he�d pulled her right into
his lap.

�Hush, dear hear,� he said soothingly. �He�s only angry because he loves you so.�

Eris hiccupped and buried her face
in Severus� robes. �Is the door locked?�

�Yes, it is,� Severus said quietly. �You needn�t worry about anyone seeing your
face all smudged.�

�Good,� Eris said breathlessly and raised her
head to kiss Severus. He held himself
rigid for a moment, but she wore him down.
Finally, he gave in with a groan when she straddled his lab and pushed
her hips against his.

She carried on in that manner for
some time, mapping out his mouth with her tongue and allowing him to do the
same. As her urgency died down and she
began to feel calm once again, she moved to trailing tender kisses along his
neck until he gently pulled her into a hug that allowed no movement on her
part. �Eris, you can�t do this. I can�t be a substitute for him. The man will worship the ground you walk upon
if you�d only let him.�

�No less than you would,� Eris said
softly. �Why won�t you just let me love
you?�

�I�m sure Sirius would ask you the same
question.�

She felt furious then and left out
of Severus� arms. �Some times I think
that I�d be better off trapped as Lucius� pet.
At least I always knew what to expect from him!�

Severus stood and she felt a
tremor of terror at how furious he looked.
�Never say such things!�

Eris straightened her spine. �It�s true.
One moment I�m telling Sirius exactly what I thought he�d be hoping to
hear and the next he wants all or nothing.
One minute you�re hot enough for me to bed me on the spot and the next
you�re as cold as ice. What is it you
men need before I�m good enough for you?�

�The truth,� Severus said curtly.

Eris laughed cruelly. �Ah yes, because the truth will set me free,
right? I have news for you, Severus, all the truth will ever do for me is condemn
everyone I love to misery. So take your
notion of truth and stuff it up your arse.�

Eris turned and ran from the room
then, straight out of the common room down the staircase and through the halls
until she found herself facing the once again open stairwell to the
Headmistress� office. Hoping to find a
kind ear, or at least a gentle conversation, Eris crept up the stairs and into
the office. She was surprised to find it empty.
Having no where else to go, Eris sat in one of the chairs and stared off
into space.

�Troubles, child,� asked a soft, aged
voice. Eris looked up to see Albus
Dumbledore smiling down kindly at her.

She couldn�t help but laugh. �Do you speak with anyone else, old man?�

Albus chuckled. �Most of the people in this school are not
ready for that, dear. They need to learn
to get along on their own and they can�t do that if they�re always turning to
me.�

Eris nodded. �Sir, may I ask you a question?�

�Of course.�

�Did you make the choice to die,� Eris asked
quietly. �Did you know what was coming
and enter in freely to the action?�

Albus looked thoughtful for a moment. �Yes, though I wish I could have remained to
stay by Harry�s side. Leaving him to
face all this without me was a difficult choice, but it had to be done. Severus� life was at stake, and in my opinion
he was far more important, as was young Draco.
Their ages together didn�t equal mine.
They deserved a chance to know what it feels like to grow old and wise.�

Eris nodded. �May I ask you another question, sir?�

�Please do.
I�m glad to be of assistance.�

�I�m having a bit of an ethical crisis really,�
Eris said with a great sigh. �If you
knew that you were going to die�or at least that it was quite likely�would you
willingly enter into a relationship with someone especially considering that
there would be a child involved?�

�That is a lot to have on your shoulders,�
Albus said gently. �And you are thinking
of the fact that the child would die as well, I assume.�

�Yes, that is one of the strongest points,�
Eris said firmly. �It would be like
murder.�

�I must admit that I would personally decide
to wait until after things had settled down, unless there was a pressing reason
for me to do otherwise,� Albus said softly.
�But you had decided that already and so the question becomes, why would
you need to question your decision?�

�Because I can�t really explain my decision to
anyone,� Eris wailed. �I�I haven�t told
anyone but Ginny that I will be pregnant as soon as I bond with Sirius. I haven�t really told anyone that I�m certain
I�ll die. They just won�t accept that I
need to wait.�

�And why can�t you tell them?�

�Because there�s nothing anyone can do to stop
it,� Eris said as tears began to run down her face. They could lock me in the deepest vault of Gringotts and my past choices would find me and strike me
down. I don�t want to burden them with
that.�

�And yet the burden is breaking you,� Albus
said with a sigh. �This conversation is
sounding all too familiar and I�m afraid I can�t really help you without
knowing everything.�

�I can�t, sir, please forgive me,� Eris said
sadly. �I�ll take it to my grave.�

�Of course I forgive you dear,� Albus said
kindly. �Now, why don�t you go and try
to enjoy your weekend. Think hard about
this, child. You may not need to carry
this load. There must be someone you
could tell the truth to.�

Eris nodded. �Thank you, sir.�

�Eris,� Albus called as she approached the
door. �No fate is set but the one you
accept.�

Eris sighed as she walked down the
steps. Albus� words may have been true
for Muggles, but for wizards�well, some magic was
binding beyond escape.
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