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You Will Not Kiss Me	By : Prosperosdaughter Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Snape/Remus Views: 22836 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
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Chapter List
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Chapter 26: Unwelcome News

"Are you a Seer?" Snape asked, wrapped in the blanket leaning against the architrave of the kitchen door watching Lupin intently as Lupin found some cold meat, cheese, bread and pickles for them. They were both ravenous even though it was now the small hours of the following morning.

"What makes you ask that?" Lupin smiled as he put the food on a tray, and fetched two bottles of Butterbeer from the cupboard.

"What we did on the mountain – we saw that in your mind, do you remember?" Snape took the bottles from Lupin and led him back to the sitting room, where they sat on the blanket by the fire, with their indoor picnic.

As usual, Lupin ate as if it were his last meal. A man of appetites, Snape thought, and such appetites! Snape preferred to feast his eyes on Lupin's naked form than on anything else. Even watching Lupin move was deeply satisfying – Snape was happier than ever to be in his company once more.

"The summit gets regular electrical storms. I've often been caught in them when I've been walking. They're terrifically energising to a wizard. That's been a particular fantasy of mine as soon as I thought of bringing you here." He smiled lasciviously at Snape, making Snape's groin flare immediately. "It was probably luck there was that storm tonight of all nights – but maybe, just maybe, the ancient magic was kind to us. What do you think?" Lupin's tone sounded quite luscious to Snape. He was just entranced.

"Maybe. In fact, probably," Snape said quietly, watching Lupin's mouth as he spoke, thinking he had never felt such a magical place as the summit of that mountain. He still felt as if small charges of electricity were firing off his skin.

"Severus, please eat. Before you leave here, I shall plump you up." He gave a small laugh. "Possibly not enough time to plump you up before September, but at least I'd like you to be the same weight you were before I left Hogwarts." Lupin traced a finger over one of Snape's visible ribs, then pressed his palm to Snape's stomach and leaned in to kiss him and said softly, "You've been very ill, Severus. We need to take care of you. Please."

Snape smiled and stroked his beloved Lupin's face, feeling very emotional suddenly. "Am I staying for the rest of the summer?" He had assumed nothing.

"Of course. You do still want to, don't you, Severus?" Lupin said, still holding Snape, who nodded. "Excellent. You can fetch what you need from your home and we've still enough time to do some of what we wanted. I don't have the list; do you?" With one hand still resting on Snape's stomach, Lupin helped himself to a huge hunk of bread and cheese.

"I don't think so," Snape said quietly, not wanting to admit he'd destroyed it and how.

"Not to worry. We'll start from scratch as we've less time than we planned and we'll need to write off the first week at least," Lupin said happily.

"Why is that?" Snape asked, eating now with more gusto.

"I think that's the absolute minimum time I need in bed with you, or I won't be trustworthy in public. The moon is waxing after all." He laughed heartily, squeezing Snape's side and then looking very obviously at every inch of Snape's body as he ate.

Sitting there, naked on a blanket, with a picnic and a werewolf – the mental picture struck Snape as so extraordinary as to be the stuff of fantasy itself. When they'd nearly finished the food, he leant forward to Lupin and kissed him deeply. "Thank you for taking me back," he purred to Lupin's ear.

"It would have broken my heart not to," Lupin said, pressing his head to Snape's mouth. "I wanted this so very much." He turned to face Snape to kiss him, more and more passionately with each kiss, and then moving the food remnants to one side, he pressed Snape back to the floor and made love to him as gently, lovingly and devastatingly as a man could.

The spectacular dawn brought an owl to the bedroom window, which Snape let in as Lupin slept. It had the day's newspaper and a letter ... for him. Albus.

Dear boy,

My wards tell me you are with Remus. I am trusting all has gone well as you are still there. In the hopes that I am correct, I have arranged for the ingredients for Remus's Wolfsbane Potion to be delivered to you there. I am assuming, I hope not presumptuously, that you will obtain your own equipment from home. There is a small Potions lab at Plas du in the cellar, but not nearly so well-equipped to deal with Wolfsbane.

Just a gentle reminder to be back at Hogwarts by 20th August. You will recall we have a certain tournament and your input is, of course, invaluable, as always. Perhaps, Remus will be able to accompany you at least until the term starts, if that helps your plans.

Your devoted friend always, Albus

Snape's heart sank. Ten days lost. They would not even have a month. He had no interest in the Tri Wizard Tournament. He knew it had been in the planning for ages. Usually, he would be grateful for the excuse to get back to Hogwarts early from Spinner's End, but not this time. Dumbledore seemed to be suggesting he smuggle Lupin in for those ten days. Well, he just might – he just might.

He left the letter on the side table and found his shirt and trousers and made his way to the kitchen to see what he could find for Lupin's breakfast – in bed, obviously, because this is what he'd heard people did on holiday, and he was certain Lupin liked to exercise all his appetites in bed. It seemed rather wanton to him, and he smiled broadly – it felt strange to smile so broadly. Yes, he was very much enjoying being wanton.

As a Potions Master, he was also an excellent cook. He cooked for his parents when he was young, but he'd never really cooked for anyone else, and rarely bothered with food for himself at Spinner's End, but cookery spoke to his innate abilities and skill and he had mastered it quickly. He very much liked the idea of catering for all of Lupin's appetites.

He systematically rifled the larder, the cupboards and the fridge and re-ordered both, in a manner he was relatively sure would madden both Lupin and Dumbledore. He smirked to himself. Nothing made more sense than by food group and then alphabetical order, he didn't care what anyone else thought. Then he located what he wanted and prepared a lovers' breakfast of eggs Benedict.

This was a breakfast he had watched Mrs. Evans cook for Mr. Evans on Valentines' Day morning when he and Lily were 10. He remembered being transfixed watching Lily help her mother in the kitchen first to make the muffins from scratch and only once they were done to make the sauce, grill the bacon and poach the eggs to perfection. Whilst his own muffins were baking, Snape remembered the Evanses.

It was easy to see from whom Lily had got her loving and patient temperament. He liked to visit the Evans household and watching Lily's mother in the kitchen was like seeing a fairytale come true – at least, it was to Severus Snape. Mrs. Evans was always loving and smiling and patient with her girls. She even had enough affection left over for him when he'd visit: neglected ragbag that he was, full of resentment at his pitiful appearance and suspicious of adult affection. Within months of meeting Lily's parents, he used to day dream they were his own. He would pretend to disdain Mrs. Evans's random hugs, but relish them secretly. Mr. Evans, whilst affectionate with his daughters, never imposed himself on Snape, seeming to understand his wariness of men. Looking back, Snape could see Mr. Evans recognised Snape's odd flinches and mistrust and seemed to approach Snape as one would a maltreated dog one wanted to settle. He was a kind, open and hearty man. Not unlike Remus, he thought, always looking for the best in people. Even in the frightful Petunia. He sighed sadly remembering with affection the long-departed storybook parents and his beautiful Lily in the warmth and mouth-watering smells of the kitchen.

There: it was done. He found a tray and laid out the breakfast on it and took it into Lupin, who was now awake, though still drowsy.

"What is that marvellous smell, Severus?" he croaked as he watched the tray approaching. Lupin Levitated the tray whilst Severus undressed and got back into bed. "I think you must be my dark angel," Lupin said, looking at the spread and then at Snape. They fed each other eggs Benedict and drank orange juice and tea, and when there was not one scrap left, Lupin vanished the tray to the kitchen then took Snape greedily once more.

It was past lunchtime before they left the bed to bathe. It was only as they bathed together facing each other, Lupin's legs under his, to wash each other that Snape saw he had more than one Claiming bite. On his chest were two, one over each of his nipples, and another between his stomach and hip on the right hand side. They were as deep and puckered with teeth marks as the one on his neck. He supposed Lupin must have done these whilst he was in his state of bliss for he had no recollection of them at all.

Lupin confirmed it. "These bites will not fade like the others, and there is one other," he said, getting that unfocused look as he did whenever he looked at a Claiming bite. He slid his finger to Snape's perineum, and stroked there so lightly it was almost not touching, but Snape felt the Claiming bite as if it shocked him. "They will give us pleasure together, and, if necessary, if we are apart," Lupin said enigmatically.

Snape's eyebrows rose. "Tell me," he said hoarsely, as Lupin's finger still traced the lowest bite, thrilling Snape to his core and he lay back to the back of the bath to savour the mesmeric touch.

"Not now. Later." Lupin's voice was deep and thick. Snape was drifting away from Lupin's voice, drifting on a thrilling sensation as his mind clicked out of focus, and as the finger stroked, Snape felt his body being pulled towards Lupin's sitting body and hips lifted as Lupin's cock pushed into him and completed the thrill taking it to a higher intensity, as Snape wrapped his legs tightly around Lupin. Snape's eyes rolled back in ecstasy at the feel of both stiff erection and dexterous finger working him and that his muscles in turn clenched tightly and pulled rhythmically against Lupin's cock. He was panting hard, delirious with sexual ecstasy, hearing Lupin moaning, louder and louder, until Lupin stroked at the bite almost desperately and they both came hard together. What wouldn't these Kisses of Lupin's deliver, he wondered in awe.

They walked the mountainside together that afternoon. Snape had shown Lupin the letter from Dumbledore. Lupin was astounded that Dumbledore had set his wards to alert him to visitors; Snape, however, wasn't. Lupin was also disappointed that their time at the farmhouse was to be cut short but it didn't seem to cross his mind that he shouldn't follow Snape back to Hogwarts at least for those ten days.

"And when term starts," Snape said, "what will happen?" The bitter irony that it is was he who was responsible for Lupin having to leave Hogwarts galled Snape still. Such a life as that would have been as close to perfection as he could imagine.

Lupin asked Snape if he'd seen The Daily Prophet the day following his departure. Snape felt his blood run cold and he pinched the bridge of his nose hard.

"I did," he said, closing his eyes slowly and then regarding Lupin frankly as they walked. "I don't know how I can apologise enough for that."

"You can't," Lupin said lightly. "It's all part and parcel of the same thing. If I put the carving behind us, then that must be put behind us too."

"I have ruined you and your reputation. How will you get work?" Snape asked, not understanding how Lupin could be so calm, but knowing Lupin had something to tell him.

"There are those who still grant me favours – Albus, Minerva, others from the old Order. The world is not my oyster, but there are those who will hire a hard-working werewolf nonetheless. I have a job set up for September. I've been waiting for the right time to tell you."

"I'm pleased of it, Remus," Snape said genuinely, the constriction around his heart loosening somewhat. "What will you be doing?"

"I've secured a nine month contract with Gringotts. Gringotts will even provide my Wolfsbane as part of the remuneration. They don't quite have the same prejudices as wizards."

"That's good, is it not? I've heard they pay well," Snape said, wondering where Lupin would live so he could visit him. It wouldn't be the same as living with him had been, but they would be able to Apparate or travel by Floo most nights.

Lupin looked at Snape, and Snape saw there was something else to come. "I'll be joining Bill Weasley's team in Egypt."

It was like an arrow to his heart. So very far away from him for an academic year! He stopped dead on the mountainside and stared at Lupin in horror.

"So far away?" he said weakly.

"I will visit you as often as I can," Lupin said earnestly.

"I'm always hearing one Weasley or another complaining their mother is upset because Bill or Charlie hardly ever visit," Snape said accusingly.

"She's their mother," Lupin laughed. "I'm sure there are many attractions for single men like Bill and Charlie where they are that overwhelm a man's desire to see his mother! However, you are my attraction and I will come to you as often as I can," he said resolutely.

Snape wondered if a man like Bill Weasley could be an attraction for Lupin. He suspected he could well be. He'd not been insensible to the attraction of the Titian-haired man himself. And Merlin knew he didn't suppose anyone could resist Remus Lupin's wolfish magnetism if he sought them out. He bit it back harshly. After how far they'd come over these twenty four hours, all their extraordinary love-making to say something like that would destroy everything. Snape bit his tongue - very hard indeed to stifle the monster that was already taking that morsel and nurturing it and engorging it within him.

"What ... er ...what will you be doing?" Snape forced himself to ask.

"Assisting with runic casting and counter-casting. Bill and I had a few conversations about it in the hospital wing when you were first taken there. Then when I had to leave Hogwarts, I received a letter from him about the position. I believe Albus put in a word for me. It was a god-send really."

Oh how very convenient for Mr Weasley. Got straight in as soon as there was a chink of light. Oh, and it was him who agonised my core, wasn't it, trying to remove my feelings for Remus. I'm sure that was accidental - oh of course it bloody well was! his mind spat venomously. He shook himself. He frightened himself how quickly he could lose control.

"Remus, take us home," he said, his head reeling.

"What's the matter, Severus? You've gone very pale," Lupin stepped up to him briskly, held him tightly and Apparated back to the farmhouse.

Once they were back in the sitting room, Lupin got Snape a glass of Firewhiskey and sat him down. Snape stood and put the glass down and started to pace the room.

"Talk to me, Severus. Is this because I will be away?" Lupin did sit, and took a glass for himself and watched Snape pace the small room, flexing his fingers. "You understand that I have to earn a living?" Snape did not respond, his mind still spinning. "What would you have me do?" Lupin insisted, starting to sound frustrated. He watched Snape until he finished his glass, then stood quickly in front of Snape and grabbed his wrists. "Stop this, Severus, and talk to me ... now," he said firmly, locking eyes with Snape. "Tell me why you are so troubled, Severus. Remember what we said yesterday." He pulled Snape closer to him. Snape could feel that Lupin was angry, but was suppressing his anger.

"I've only just got you back," Snape said, his voice hollow. "I don't want you to go so far away." He breathed in deeply. "I don't want you to go away with Bill Weasley," he hissed, wanting to retract the words, but knowing it was better Lupin heard them.

Lupin embraced him. "I knew there was something more. Oh Severus," he said softly. "How do you do this to yourself? A young man I've met a few times – who you actually know better than I. Why would you even think it? After I've Claimed you fully too." Lupin stroked Snape's hair. Snape felt foolish. There was such disappointment in Lupin's voice. He pressed his head into Lupin's shoulder.

"Why should Bill Weasley not want you, when I want you so very much? He is a far better looking man than I. How do I know the mistake in his casting wasn't deliberate," he spat. "After all, he wrote to you straight after you left Hogwarts." He looked at Remus and saw annoyance and not a little confusion. Snape took a step back. "I'm sorry, Remus, I am a foolish and jealous man," he said, feeling small.

"You are both, Severus. Such a conspiracy you've drawn for yourself in such a short time." Lupin sighed heavily. "But you have told me, and that is good for us." Lupin placed his thumb onto the bite on Snape's neck and slowly circled it gently, sending waves of calm washing over Snape, who relaxed into Lupin's chest. They stood for a while like this, then Lupin sat Snape down and passed him the glass again. This time, Snape took it, still feeling foolish but calm.

Lupin sat at Snape's feet, and poured himself another drink, draping his free arm over Snape's knee whilst Snape ran his finger through Lupin's hair.

"Tell me what you find attractive about Bill Weasley," Lupin said quietly.

"What?" Snape said, surprised by the question.

"Tell me. You said he was far better looking than you. So you've observed him closely. Tell me," Lupin said calmly, tracing a finger on Snape's leg. "I'm interested."

"I'm not," said Snape brusquely, looking at Lupin's head intently, wondering if he should be concerned. He had seen Lupin be possessive once before and it had been frightening. Just as that thought formed, he realised the cycle he initiated: his irrational jealousy provoking Lupin's possessiveness. He closed his eyes and ran his palm across his face. This was surely an abject lesson for him to try to rein in his temperament.

He leaned forward to kiss Lupin's head. "You are the only man I wish to look at. Please Remus, I'm just sorely disappointed." He draped his arms around Lupin's neck as Lupin raised his head to kiss him.

"Severus," he whispered, Snape thought wih a menacing edge to his voice, "jealousy can be a two-way street. Be careful of me." He kissed Snape again, then smiled briefly but his smile did not quite touch his eyes.

"I am faithful. Trust me on it. Never question me on it, not while you bear my marks." He took Snape's arms from himself gently and stood, his expression set, his jaw muscles visibly working. "I'll make dinner now." He left to go to the kitchen. Snape knew he was not to follow. He leant his elbows on his knees as he thought. He wondered if anyone jumped to conclusions as quickly as he did. He had spoilt their walk and spoilt the mood. He downed his glass. He remembered Dumbledore's letter and went to the kitchen. Lupin was chopping some vegetables, rather intensely, with a knife, not with magic.

"Remus, where is the door to the cellar Albus spoke of?" Snape said gingerly, seeing the man's mood had not lifted.

"Under the stairs," he said briskly, not looking up.

It was a relatively large cellar for the size of the house. It had obviously been designed partly as a root cellar with many different compartments. One part of it held a couple of work benches and some potion-making equipment but Dumbledore was right, it wasn't nearly sufficient for Snape. He'd brought a quill and parchment and started making a list of what was required. Tomorrow, he would go back to Spinner's End to collect what he needed.

He cast several hefty cleaning charms over the cellar to start with so that was one less job to do tomorrow. He turned to leave and something about the heavy wooden door caught his eye. He went to it and closed it so he could look at the inside surface. Deep long gouges scarred its surface. He looked around the cellar with fresh eyes, seeing gouges even made in the stone. Lupin had used this cellar to transform in the past before he had Wolfsbane. His stomach lurched wretchedly. Lupin did not deserve to have Snape making him miserable for no reason. He surely had enough of his own misery to contend with.

He returned to the kitchen and took Lupin in his arms roughly, raking his hair.

"I love you and I'm sorry," he said assertively, knowing it lacked eloquence, but not knowing what else to say. After a moment's stunned silence, Lupin returned the embrace and kissed him.

"So do I and so am I," he said to Snape's mouth and they kissed, then Lupin moved quickly away to rescue a boiling saucepan.

After dinner, Snape finished his list of equipment and other things to bring from Spinner's End and then wrote a note to Albus to send when the owl arrived with the Wolfsbane supplies.

"I can transform in the cellar, if it makes you more comfortable," Lupin suggested.

"You will do no such thing," Snape said. "I am your guest. If I need to, I can Apparate back to Spinner's End. Why should you have to spend the night in that hole if you are not dangerous? I can be back for moonset to tend you, if necessary – as we used to."

"As we used to," Lupin agreed, smiling softly at Snape.

They slipped into bed together and Lupin pulled Snape on top of him, to kiss him passionately.

"I know you struggle with your jealousy, Severus. You must never stop struggling against it, and you must trust me," Lupin said softly. "We can be what we want to be if we have faith in each other. I have Claimed you and you alone bear my marks. You are a remarkably passionate man and you excite me more than you realise." Lupin stroked Snape's face, never removing his gaze from Snape's eyes. "You know how I have trusted you as no man before you. I trust you still. Do not dishonour my trust in you Severus by believing I would allow it to another. Take me now and feel my trust in you."

Snape moaned Lupin's name low in his throat and lay slowly on top of him just for the feel of their skin together and of their erections side by side, his weight on his elbows. Lupin rubbed his hips against Snape's as they licked and sucked each other's neck and ground against each other relatively gently as Snape breathed deeply to contain himself so he would not rush or squander this time that was always so special to him.

He knew the truth of Lupin's words. He needed to impress them into his mind to use as a shield against his violent insecurities so they didn't assail him at the least opportunity and spoil this love. He and Lupin had been through so much, forgiven each other so much, given each other so much. To Snape's mind, they were more than special. They were blessed if he could just trust.

He needed to impress this love-making into his heart and soul so he was slow and sure; gentle but passionate; stimulating Lupin in every way he knew aroused him so he could imprint Lupin's mounting ardour in his mind – his aroused expressions, his sensual and guttural noises increasing to his pleas for more and culminating in his cries of release – all under his hand and on his cock. Nothing had ever aroused him more. Nothing could release him physically and mentally as this man could – fully and completely.
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You Will Not Kiss Me