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Temporary	By : sabreenthequeen Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 25226 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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Chapter
28: Shattered

With
newfound strength, I walked back to the Head Dorms, ready to face the
night alone. Blaise had dropped me off by the portrait without a word
more and I welcomed the silence. Although his words had caused me
grief to know that Draco was changing, killing 3 muggles and who knew
what else, I was glad Blaise told me anyway. Snape had said that
Draco was safe wherever he was yet what was that dream about? Why did
I have that feeling that Draco was in danger?

I
shook myself out of my thoughts, said the new password, and stepped
inside. A cold draft foreshadowed upcoming events and I walked inside
to confront the loneliness. For that moment I didn't want to think
about anything else but sleep. I needed time to think about this, but
not tonight. Tonight I was going to forget about everything, curl up
in a couch with a hot mug of cocoa and snuggle into a good book.

However
oddly, the Head Rooms were deathly quiet and an eerie calm settled
over the room. I trembled, and thoughts of a book and some cocoa
receded into the back of my mind. Shaking my fear and loneliness
away, I ascended the steps that would lead me to my room. I needed
the sleep very badly.

As
much as I fought for elves rights, I was shocked and dare I admit
–disappointed (Shame, shame, Hermione!)– that my clothes
were not put away. I had gone shopping with Tonks before coming to
Hogwarts. She was better to shop with than with Parvati, Lavender,
and Ginny, that was for sure. At least Tonks –even though she
knocked down all the dresses that were hung– didn't want me to
dress like a slut.

The
suitcase was resting on my bed –which was the only thing fixed
up and neatly made of which I was highly grateful for– and I
opened it, looking at all the clothes that I recently bought. The
style differed greatly from what I used to wear. No more overly large
T-shirts. No more baggy sweatshirts and pants. But oh, sure they
weren't baggy and huge, but they weren't loud and provocative. They
fit my personality quite well unlike the whore-y dresses that the
girls and Draco always wanted me to wear. The new wardrobe included
dress pants, button-up shirts and other dressy tops, conservative
skirts, and a few comfortable jeans that looked tight magically but
felt loose and comfy. Draco would probably call them too businesslike
and restrictive, but I call it class.

I
opened up my wardrobe and pushed all my uniforms in one side so that
I could fit the new clothes in there. Just as I was opening and
pushing the clothes aside, to my ill luck, the red dress was the one
that met my eyes. It was the very red dress Draco gave me on
Valentine's Day. That silky red dress I wore when he proposed to me.

I
dropped the other clothes I held and picked the red dress off its
hanger. I brought it to my face where I sniffed the smell of Phoenix
Champagne that Draco drank and I was almost going to drink too before
he stopped me and proposed. It also had the smell of the roses and
the snow that covered the landscape. It transported my mind back
those many days ago and I held the dress tight against my bosom. A
silent tear of fading happiness and longing trailed down my cheek and
stained the dress.

I
sniffed and hastily put the dress back in the hanger and continued on
with my work of unpacking and hanging the new items. I didn't want to
think about Draco for the moment at all.

I
opened a drawer in my dresser where I kept my underwear to pick out
something to wear that night. My fingers lightly skimmed over the
green and black corset that seemed to be waiting there for me to see.
A coincidence? Or did fate want me to relive the memories that
tightened my chest and brought tears to my eyes and left it there for
me see?

Whatever
it was, be it coincidence or intention, I didn't wipe away any of the
tears that escaped because I realized then that I couldn't stop them
from coming all the time and that I needed to let it all out. The
tears would take out the stress, the pain, and the sorrow. I was
crying for the pain of leaving him, for the deaths of people that
occurred due to my hasty decision, for not listening to him, for not
giving him a chance. I cried because I missed him and I cried because
of the guilt. The guilt of leaving, the guilt of being with George,
and the guilt I felt because of his death.

And
that was when I recalled the mirror that Tonks gave me and I called
out the name of my ex-arch nemesis, my lover, my fiancé the
man who I would give my life for. I wanted to talk to him, see him,
touch him. I ached for the cool breath of his mouth, the fire that
awakened in me with his hands, the gentleness of his lips, the
roughness of his tongue. But along with that, the conversation with
Blaise and Snape was ringing in my head, obscuring the image of my
Draco, turning the sexy love of my life into a monster and I didn't
want to believe it. I didn't want their words to be true. Killed 3
muggles? Impossible.

I
called out his name again, looking hard into the opaque mirror. When
there was no response, I closed my eyes.

Sweat.
Kisses. Draco's burning touch.

Stormy
gray eyes.

Pale
skin.

Dark
Mark.

White hot anger.

I
threw the mirror away from me in frustration and saw my reflection
shatter to a million pieces.

Of
the pieces, one had a gray eye– staring, unblinking.

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My eyes snapped open,
ending that horrible dream. It was first the dream I had while
sleeping in Grimmauld's place the night George died but then morphed
into an entirely different one. It felt real, though, as if those
guys from the alley – the ones that were going to do Lord knows
what to me before George came to save me –had really come and
took me away.

I
shifted in the bed and found it oddly different from the one I was
sleeping on earlier. The mattress was hard, not soft and bouncy like
my own. The sheets were silky –not cotton. The comforter made
of velvet.

Where
was I?

Was
the dream real then? Was I really kidnapped by those 5 boys?

It
was dark. I couldn't see properly. I was, however, able to make out
that the shadows of the furniture surrounding me was not mine. I was
in a different place. But where?

Suddenly,
with the question still fresh in my mind, a single candle lit up the
darkened room and I was able to see the green and silver combinations
that decorated the room.

Then
it suddenly clicked; Draco's bedroom.

And
just then, with the name of the man on my lips, I saw his face
appear. The mattress depressed and he came closer to me, each of his
hands on either side of my body, upon the mattress to give him
support.

My
heart was swelling in happiness. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach
and everything felt so perfect all of a sudden. I watched his face.
His lovely, pointed face, his stormy gray eyes, and the smirk playing
on his lips. He came closer, predator-like, until his nose was almost
touching mine. The smell of his breath was cool against my face.

I
couldn't move a muscle. My body was trembling in anticipation –and
only later would I know –fear. And then, before I was able to
open my mouth, before I was able to shout out his name in joy, before
I was able to utter a single sound or gasp, his lips pressed against
mine in a bruising kiss.

Unlike
what I would've done previously, I didn't kiss him back.

My
eyebrows creased unfamiliarity.

Draco's
weight pressed upon my body. His lips were harsh against my own. His
hands went everywhere. Roaming around my body, touching my flesh and
igniting a kind of lust I never felt before. A lust that was lined
dangerously with fear. His hands were not touching me in the
lovingly, sexy way I remembered, and I was scared.

He
pulled back, breathless, looked at me with his steely gray eyes, and
then went in to attack the flesh on my neck. I couldn't speak even
then. I found my lips to be bloodied. A harsh, metallic taste
lingered in my mouth.

I
didn't respond to his touches at all because I knew, I had a strange
yet strong feeling that this wasn't Draco.

It
couldn't be him. Draco was never this harsh. Even when he wanted to
be in control, even he would get a little kinky, he wouldn't force me
to kiss him. He wouldn't touch me like this. And after not seeing him
in so long, sure he would have an urge to kiss me, to have sex with
me, but that didn't mean he would be like this. That didn't mean he
wouldn't talk. That didn't mean that his touches would be so harsh
and mechanical, so unloving.

I
was with Draco far too long to know how he would react, how he would
be in a certain situation. I was with him far too long to see that
this wasn't him.

But
he was Draco; his eyes, his hair, his nose, his lips, his body. They
all were Draco's. Was it just me then? Was being with George that one
moment change everything? Was being away from Draco for just a few
weeks end up with a change in him that I didn't notice before?

“Draco,
look at me,” I told him sternly. I squirmed away from his lips
and forced him to look at me. His eyes didn’t meet mine for too
long, but it was just that one look into his eyes that told me that
my thoughts were right: This wasn’t Draco.

He
changed.

And
just then, I made my decision. I wouldn't take this. I was ending
this. I was ending my relationship with a Muggle-Murder. I was ending
my relationship with a Death Eater. He was no longer the Draco I
knew. This was an impostor

And
so I tried to push him off of me, but it was then that the monster in
him awakened. He put all his weight into me and kissed me harshly.
Our teeth clanked hard against the other and the vibrations shook me
to my very core. The events that transpired in the few moments
afterward were all a blur. His hands were everywhere. Tearing the
clothes off my body, groping, pinching, squeezing, poking.

It
hurt and everything started to just crumble in that one moment. In
that one moment my image of Draco shattered into a million pieces. In
that one moment I lost him.

But
then all of a sudden, just as I heard the sound of him unzipping his
pants, his entire weight was lifted off of me and he was thrown back
with a gigantic force. His back collided with the wall and he stared
straight at me in a look of pure loathing. I stared right back at
him. The dimness of the room made it hard to see him that far but in
that one quick glance, I noticed something that wasn't there before.
The Draco in front of me, still held up against the wall by a magical
force, had longer hair, hair that went past his shoulders, and steel
gray eyes.

It
wasn't Draco.

It
was Lucius Malfoy.

I
drew my knees to my naked chest and looked at the face of Lucius
Malfoy through my glossy eyes, eyes that were red with crying.

I
closed them -my eyes- unable to take it in any longer, unable to
understand what just happened. Draco was hurting me, almost raping
me, but when did Lucius come?

“Avada
Kedavra!” a voice shouted. It was Draco's voice but it came
from somewhere else. Somewhere towards the left, somewhere I couldn't
see. A blinding green light appeared out of nowhere and in a split
second the man that was about to rape me, died. In a split second,
his face completely changed to Lucius Malfoy's. In a split second, I
was confronted with a situation I never knew would happen.

In
just one night, I was suddenly scared of a man who I loved.

In
one night, I was almost raped by a person who stole my lover's face,
who happened to be the very man who killed my baby, who happened to
be the father of my lover.

It
was just too much to process in one day, one week, one lifetime.

I
was breaking apart. I was supposed to be the strong one. I was
supposed to be the one who wouldn't give in so easily, who wouldn't
just break apart in a moment, but right now it just wasn't happening.
That strong Hermione has been defeated.

Suddenly,
I felt two very familiar and warm hands wrap themselves around me,
holding my trembling body into his solid form. I knew who he was just
then. I knew his real identity. He was Draco Malfoy, but he was also
a murder. I knew that he only killed his father because Lucius was
using his body to rape me, but the fact remained the same; Draco
Malfoy had done the Unforgivable. And in that one moment, the image
of my perfect Draco, the Draco I knew, the Draco I learned to love...

...was
shattered.

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