Torment *Completed* | By : Kvarta Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 31716 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 8 |
Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction. Harry Potter is owned by J.K. Rowling. This story is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made from it. |
A/N: I know, again short time between posts, but I just received very annoying news from my work and needed to de-stress myself.
Hermione sighed, so much has changed in just ten days. After the initial shock and extremely bumpy start, they settled into some sort of routine. She would read, quietly, in her corner he would stare at the ceiling or sleep. She offered to read to him but he growled at her she offered to charm a book of his choice to hover above him, he hissed at her. And that was that - she never mentioned it again.
He would dutifully take his medicines. He would grunt, and hiss and flinch at her touch during daily exercise, his muscles tight instead of relaxed. He flung her two times out of the basin…once against the wall…until Poppy intervened, but after that, she resumed to wash his hair while he growled like a muzzled rabid dog.
Poppy began to introduce the food to him, so she had to learn few more spells. He certainly didn’t like that. And he certainly didn’t like to be fed, for Merlin’s sakes – he nearly bit her! After that, Poppy was sitting through his meals while she would sit in Poppy’s office. And that bothers her!
Before he opened his eyes, no matter the procedure Poppy wouldn’t throw her out of the room. Now…well now was ‘Leave us, girl’ with Poppy or ‘Out with you.’ With Malfoy way too often. How was she supposed to look after him if they wouldn’t let her near him half of the time? If they kept her in the dark. She feels excluded, rejected…hurt by their actions. It was junior school, first year at Hogwarts, before Harry and Ron, all over again.
‘Face it, Hermione, you were never big on friends.’ She sighs. She does have friends now…Harry, Ron, Ginny, Neville even Luna…All the Weasley’s. Pain hits her and she curls up, pulls into herself, wrapping her arms around her, gripping tight, it is unbearable and she might fall apart, explode if there is nothing to hold her. But, she has no one besides herself. She can’t think of Weasley family yet, broken…incomplete.
Luckily, the sharing of the memories stopped. She is not sure if it’s stopped for good or is he managed to rein it. He certainly is not in a sharing mood, even for information such as that. And she is prohibited to read the books on Mind Magic. Well, she is certain that there are no more sex dreams on his part, she was not forced to use the incantation on him, thanks Merlin for small favours.
She takes a sip of tea and sighs again. Later today Harry will come, with Malfoy no doubt. And if it all goes well today…in a couple of days, they will move to the Manor. She shakes her head violently. No! She does not want to go there. She does not want to set foot in that place ever again. Fear travels up her spine in a slow icy wave. But, she must. She has to grip her teeth and go there…or let someone else take care of him. No! That is impossible! The Malfoy’s won’t harm him, she is aware of that, she saw enough to know that much, but Manor is crawling with Aurors. She does not trust them. So many still hate him. He is the hero! Wizengamot freed him. Ministry rewarded him. People did not forget or forgive him, at least majority didn’t. And no one, no one understands how much his life is important. Poppy returns.
“Go on girl, and be ready for him to bite.” Matron chuckles, her eyes widened “Oh, no, not like that, girl. But he can talk now. Don’t take to the heart what he says.”
“Right. I think, by now, I’m used to it.”
“I wouldn’t bet on that. He is twice as grouchy when he’s sick.” There is a warning in Poppy’s voice. She nodded and walks slowly towards the room, stifling the jealousy. Why is she jealous at Matron? She has no right to be. But Matron knows him so well, he respects Poppy, she can tell. And he hates her, she can tell that too. Why? She never did anything to deserve his hate or despise.
She enters the room. In a way, she feels honoured. His magic holds the door of the room, only Poppy, Malfoy and her are allowed, everyone else stays outside. And that is the strangest thing. He can’t use his magic, well not properly. Poppy says it will pass. His magic is at the moment wild, unpredictable like he is, and still, it is not damaging, it seems that his magic follows his unspoken wishes. He does not want visitors, so no one may enter the room. He does not agree with her being near him, so she finds herself flying through the air, not harmed but rejected.
“How are you feeling, Professor?” He turns his head from her, silent. She sighs again. “Very well. But now you can speak, so if you need anything just ask.”
“Disappear from my vicinity.” He growled quietly through clenched teeth, painful words ‘Right, don’t take it by heart.’ Poppy warned her
“You know I can’t do that. But anything else…” she gives him time but it seems that their conversation is exhausted itself “Right, I’ll be here reading.” She sits on the sofa and takes the book.
~ S ~ S ~ S ~
“Really, Severus, you are going to spoil him rotten.” Narcissa’s voice is light, with slight chuckle “He has his own bed and he should be sleeping in there, not in your arms.”
“We played and he just fell asleep.”
“That is not a reason to let him sleep in your arms.”
“I know, but I won’t be able to see him as much after tomorrow.”
“Suit yourself.” She gives up “Will you be going to the club tonight?”
“I don’t know, it is up to Lucius.” She sighs heavily, he turns to her, peeling his eyes from the window “He is faithful, Cissa.”
“I know. I know that he is. You both are.” She smiles “And I am grateful for your role in it.”
“He loves you, he wouldn’t cheat on you, it does not matter if I’m there or not.”
“I know, but then he would be forced to do so, expected. You provide him with ample excuse.”
“I will never understand…”
“It is what it is. We were brought up not to question the way of our society just to follow them. I have to go, you just place him in the cradle when you get tired.”
He nods and looks at the toddler in his arms. He shifts him so that baby’s head in on his shoulder. Toddler sighs deeply but doesn’t wake up. He resumes his gazing through the window, at the meticulous lawn and flower beds. He presses his cheek at the baby’s downy soft blond hair, hugging him tightly.
It hurts, his heart quivers in pain. It almost takes him by surprise, he is so used to lock down all emotions that this one startles him. This baby in his arms, he does care deeply for it, but it is a reminder. A painful reminder of what he lost, what he will never have. What he might have if he wasn’t so foolish.
His eyelids feel like they are full of needles. He doesn't like children so why would he regret not having one? He wouldn’t even know how to be a parent, not like he had upstanding role-models growing up. No, the world is better of with dying out of the Snape line.
Soft hands are on his face, gently brushing below his eyes. Is he crying? Salazar!
“Don’t think like that, Professor. You are still young, you can still have kids. I think it was sweet, even if it’s Draco, the way you held him…you know?”
He opens his eyes to meet the soft brown ones, gentle and caring, worried, sad. She has no right! This is private, too private. No one is privy to this part of him, so why does she thinks she has to right to know or say anything?
“Unhand me you pest.” He hisses at her
She removes her hands, backing up a little. Brown eyes are hurt now.
“I am sorry, Professor. I was just…right…sorry.”
Brown eyes brim with tears, she moves from his line of sight. He hears her take one shrubbery breath but there is no sniffling or sobbing, he takes it as a sign that she calmed herself down. Her mind is not so flustered now, but it still is unfocused, all over the place.
Merlin, no wonder he didn’t even suspect her, he would imagine that her mind is organised, almost as meticulous as his. Poppy told him that she made notes of what she’s done, but they didn’t manage to figure out much. He is not surprised, he is used to reading her essays, riddled with cross-references and packed with information useful and not so useful. She was always so anal and wide in her work. But he needs to be better, his magic has to mend before he would be able to solve the puzzle, to undo what she’s done. To kick her out of his brain and remove himself from her presence. For now, she is still there, he can feel her almost painfully like a needle stuck in his root canal.
“Out with you.” Lucius, shuffling of the feet and small steps walking away ‘At least she does not argue anymore.’ For the first few days, he was sick and tired of their bickering, arguing about their ownership of him like two dogs over the bone. What right did she have? Like she has a claim on him!
Lucius comes to his view and he smiles.
~ S ~ S ~ S ~
The moment little mudblood whore left the room Severus smiles at him. It is a sad smile, and he is sure that his friend is unaware of that fact. He would not reveal that much, not on purpose, and that tells him how weak his friend is. He stifles the hiss of pain, sitting on his customary edge of the bed.
“Poppy told me she finally lifted her jinx.”
“My jinx, Lucius.The bloody woman used my jinx on me.” Severus’s voice is changed, gravely, bit deeper than it was but still holds a good quality
“Yes, the woman is formidable and fearless.” He chuckles “Narcissa and Draco send their love.”
“And you be sure to…”
“They know. They are excited to greet you. Not so happy about your guard dog.” He is not happy to accommodate her in his home, but he would turn the earth and the sky for Severus. The man who not only gave him his son but saved his son’s life, at the risk of its own. Severus groans and he can sympathise. “Poppy is adamant, either she comes with you or you stay here.”
“Thank you,” Severus whispered
“Don't worry, we will find the way to…dispose…of her.”
“I do not think that world would be so forgiving if we relieve it of the member of Golden Trio, and no less than Gryffindor Princess.” He nearly chuckled at the lamenting sound in his friend’s voice
“That bad?”
“Regrettably so.”
“Show me, don’t strain your throat, show me.” He leans and gazes in Severus’s eyes. Severus nods and locks his gaze with his, pushing images of their first time in the basin and up to now. He can sense the struggle to keep at bay unwanted information, and he is trying to push them away but they float in sight, even for a second. He feels sad, this is the mind that even Albus and Dark Lord couldn’t break, and now it is so open and vulnerable.
He pulls back, he saw more than his friend maybe intended. For one part he is glad for other…he is not happy. But maybe, just maybe the little mudblood can be useful to him. And a bit of entertainment wouldn’t hurt.
“Merlin!” he voices
“At this point, I am regretting ever waking up. It almost makes me want to be in the hands of Dark Lord again.”
“Don’t say that. But this can be…of use, Severus.”
“She is guarded by Poppy,” Severus growls
“She is now,…but she won’t be…at the Manor.” He inches his head slightly
“She is not to be…damaged.”
“And who mentioned anything about damaging her? The hair of her head won’t be missing.” He smiles and Severus grins at him. It is a slow and so familiar grin. Oh, this is going to be fun! “Just hold on for few more days. I am going now, we don’t want to set off Poppy.”
“Give them my love Lucius.”
“I will.”
He stands and bites down the hiss, again. Pain radiates with every step he takes. Taking a deep steadying breath, he straightens his back and walks to Poppy’s office. The mudblood and Potter are there, he gazes at Potter but address her
“Granger, I did consent to you to accompany him. Make no mistake in my good nature, there is none. I do not want you in my home. You will carry that sofa with you, I do not desire that you soil any of my furniture. You will be confined to the room you’ll share with Severus and only that en-suite. You will have access to the pool but only accompanied by a house-elf. I do not wish to catch you roaming around my home at any moment.”
“Mr Malfoy, you do not have to worry. I do not wish to be in your home any more than you want me there.” She narrows her eyes at him
“If any of my servants is set free, even by accident, you…will…pay…for…it. Dearly. Did I made myself clear?”
“Now, wait a minute Malfoy…” Harry is on his feet. He turns his eyes on the boy again, he loathes the fact that he does owe to the boy. He did, after all, saved his son’s life.
“It is fine Harry.” She places her arm on Potter’s “It wouldn’t be any different no matter what Mr Malfoy said. I will have right to go into the hallway and talk to Harry, that is if Professor does not change his mind and allow Harry to the room?”
“Only to talk to Potter.” He hisses and turns, walking away
“That is all I need. Thank you, Mr Malfoy.”
He does not acknowledge that he heard her. Potter is arguing with her now, but he did set the stage. This will be fun! Still, he refuses to lose his friend, and Severus has no will to live, not now. Severus needs a challenge, something to focus on, and the little mudblood dirt is a good distraction. He has no qualms to toss her in the cage of a wild beast. After all, that beast is his brother.
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