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Lost and Damned	By : danniperson Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Snape Views: 24087 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, the characters or the world or anything, and I make absolutely no profit from this.

Chapter List
- 27
- 28
- 29
Lost and Damned

The Moment of Truth

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�NOW!� Harry yelled.
�REDUCTO!� six different voices behind him shouted. And six curses flew in six different directions and the shelves all around them exploded as the spells hit. The hundreds of glass spheres lining the shelves burst open, pearly white figures forming in their place, voices echoing all at once, making it impossible to decipher anything they were saying, if he cared to. Glass and wood rained down on the floor and Harry turned away from the Death Eaters and faced his friends.
�RUN!�

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Severus ran. He ran as fast as he could through the trees, feeling himself panic the further into the forest he traveled. Damn it, he was going to kill Potter if he got himself into serious danger! He would kill Umbridge first for good measure and Granger for letting it happen, of course.
Maybe he wasn�t even here, Severus reminded himself. He had told Minerva the boy could very well be at the Ministry trying to save his dogfather. Great. The boy was either in a dangerous forest with an evil witch and dangerous creatures or at the Ministry of Magic walking into a Death Eater trap. That boy was a trouble magnet. Absolute trouble. Images flashed through his mind�Many masked Death Eaters firing curses in Potter�s direction. Being thrown around the forest by various creatures. Severus gritted his teeth and tried not to think about it, moving more swiftly.
�POTTER!�

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Neville was on the floor, twisting and screaming in agony in response to Bellatrix Lestrange�s curse. Before he could do much, two doors burst open and Sirius, Lupin, Moody, Tonks, and Kingsley marched in, wands drawn. The Death Eaters all turned their attention to the new arrivals but Bellatrix who eyed Neville and Harry hungrily.
There was no time to think or worry or say anything. Bellatrix cast another curse in his direction and Harry lunged out of the way, stumbling as he tried to remain on his feet. Chaos surrounded him. Jets of light flashed all through the room and spells and curses were shouted loudly, echoing throughout the room. It was almost impossible to tell who was dueling who and who was casting what curse. Harry only ran, dodging the spells that he could and firing his own only when he was sure it was a Death Eater on the receiving end.
�Harry!� Sirius yelled, going after Bellatrix. �Take the prophecy, grab Neville, and run!�

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�HELP! HELP! STOP! STOP, YOU INSANE ANIMALS! FILTHY HALF-BREEDS! GET OFF! STOP! I COMMAND IT!�
Hearing the frantic voice of Dolores Umbridge, Severus slowed down and approached the direction of her voice cautiously. He heard the sound of hooves hitting the ground and angry, offended voices snarling at Umbridge. Centaurs. Foolish woman. Severus stood near a tree, peeking out from its side cautiously. Umbridge was hanging upside down from a tree, one leg tied to a branch while the rest of her dangled about. She was bloody and bruised and wailing, though no one seemed to be throwing any punches now or throwing anything or whatever it was they had been doing with her. It actually looked like they might have dragged her through the forest and she had gotten cut and bruised on rocks or sticks and such things, though Severus couldn�t be certain.
Potter and Granger were nowhere to be seen, though. Severus was tempted to turn and go back and leave her here to her suffering�She certainly deserved it, didn�t she? And yet he waited a moment, wondering if he should offer any aid. No, he decided. He still had Harry to attend to�To find and deal with so he could finally find some peace.
�Someone is here,� said one of the centaurs.
�Another human,� said another.
Hearing movement approaching him, Severus braced himself.

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�Where is my son? I saw him here?� demanded Lucius Malfoy from somewhere nearby Harry.
�My nephew hasn�t become a traitor, has he?� demanded Bellatrix as she continued firing curses at Sirius.
�Of course not!� Lucius cried indignantly. �He came to help, no doubt. To stop them�How could you even think Draco--�
�Yes, yes, I know!� Bellatrix cried impatiently. �CRUCIO!�
�AGHHHH!�
Harry tried helping Neville out, but found himself stopped, firing curses between Dolohov and an unknown Death Eater who had advanced upon him.
�STUPEFY!�
�EXPELLIARMUS!�
�CRUCIO!�
�IMPERIO!�
�IMPEDIMENTIA!�
Neville was stumbling a bit, making him hard to keep an eye on and protect. Seeing Dolohov aim his wand at Neville, Harry quickly jumped and shoved the other boy aside, landing with a hard and painful thud on the floor, immediately struggling with his sore muscles to stand up.
�AVADA KEDAVRA!�
The words were spoken so close to him it stunned him. Brilliant green light momentarily blinded him and a loud thud assured him that someone had died. There was a roar of laughter and Harry blinked the dots out of his eyes and looked around frantically, staring in wide eyed shock and horror at Ron Weasley, laying spread eagle on the floor, his blue eyes wide open and empty.

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A little over an hour later, Harry Potter found himself sitting in Dumbledore�s office, nice and neat as though nothing had ever happened here. He felt numb. He should feel much more than this, shouldn�t he? He forced himself to think of his best friend�Ron Weasley, who was practically his brother, dead. Died because he had jumped in front of Harry to save him. Another person died for him. He felt a strange throbbing deep within him, as if promising he would suffer immensely later on. For now, though, he felt nothing but exhaustion as he stared ahead straight ahead of him. Time had little meaning, and it could have been seconds or minutes or hours or days for all Harry knew, the time Dumbledore finally came in.
The portraits all exclaimed their greetings as Dumbledore walked in, but Harry barely spared him a glance, hardly noticed his entrance at all. Dumbledore said nothing to him, either, for a moment. He walked to the perch where Fawkes usually stood and pulled the now small, ugly, featherless phoenix from an inner pocket in his robe and placed him gently among the ashes. Harry watched dully and kept his eyes on the bird as Dumbledore walked around to sit behind his desk.
�Well, Harry,� said Dumbledore softly, �you will be pleased to hear that none of your fellow students are going to suffer any lasting damage from the night�s events.�
None of his fellow students? Harry supposed he should have been mad, but couldn�t seem to muster up enough energy for it. �Ron�s dead,� he said flatly.
�Yes,� Dumbledore said sadly. �Ron Weasley is dead.� After a moment the older wizard continued. �Madam Pomfrey is patching everybody up now. Nymphadora Tonks may need to spend a little time in St. Mungo�s, but it seems that she will make a full recovery.�
Harry nodded slowly. Everyone else would be fine, but his best friend in the whole world was dead. His first friend, Harry thought to himself, his heart suddenly lurching painfully from beneath that thick blanket of numbness. He felt tears beginning to sting his eyes and his throat suddenly felt dry and hot.
�I know how you are feeling, Harry,� Dumbledore said very quietly.
�No�No, you don�t,� Harry growled, feeling close to shouting or sobbing and not sure if the sudden burst of anger or crippling pain was stronger. He wanted to crawl up inside of himself and hide beneath the cover of deadness that had consumed him since leaving the Ministry. His body felt entirely too small and confined for the powerful emotions rushing through him.
Dumbledore did not argue. Instead he went on about how feeling pain was his greatest strength and other nonsense that irritated him. Every word the headmaster spoke, he could feel poking at something deep within him, pushing buttons and making everything he felt so much worse. His best friend was dead. He did not need to be told how good it was that he was feeling awful because of it. Harry didn�t want to hear anything good after what had happened. He wanted to argue, but he didn�t trust himself to speak or move. He felt weak�Like his voice might break and he wouldn�t hold near the anger he wanted to once he got going. His arms were folded across his chest, every muscle in his body stiff and tight and unmoving as he stared out of the window behind Dumbledore�s head. He didn�t want to be here. He didn�t want to hear anything this man said.
If Dumbledore hadn�t left, none of this would have happened. If Snape would have just listened to him, this could have been avoided. If everyone would have listened to Harry and stayed behind, Ron would still be alive. Harry just nodded, hardly listening to the words the headmaster spoke, only hearing that loud shout of the Killing Curse and the sight of his very best friend lying dead at his feet. The teasing words Dolohov and Bellatrix had shouted at him, picking on him for his best friend�s death. Making light of something so awful.
Harry was pulled back into the present as the sun began to rise and Dumbledore was saying his name. �Harry?�
�Mhm?� he asked, grateful that he had been pulled away from that awful memory, wishing desperately he could get rid of it. Maybe it wasn�t real. Maybe none of this was real, he thought hopefully. It was all just a dream�An awful nightmare or a vision. Maybe it wasn�t even the real Ron�Someone had been pretending to be Ron to spy on them and they had killed that imposter�His best friend was alive and safe. Harry hoped it desperately. Life without Ron Weasley�It was so strange. It couldn�t be real.
�Harry, I owe you an explanation,� Dumbledore said. �An explanation of an old man�s mistakes��
Harry raised his eyebrow and sniffed, shifting in his chair a bit, trying to focus on Dumbledore�s words instead of his horrible thoughts. It was almost irritating, the extravagant way Dumbledore had to tell him whatever it was. Why couldn�t he just get to the point? He held little interest for the first few minutes, as Dumbledore went over things Harry already knew, about his scar and his connection to Voldemort. He went on about his fear of Voldemort using Harry to spy on Dumbledore, something Snape had driven into his head on many occasions for that to be nothing new. Harry felt restless, wanting to snap at the man to tell him to hurry up so he could leave. He wanted to go to bed and wake up and have everything be fine. Sitting here was becoming torture.
Sirius had never been taken, Dumbledore explained, and Kreacher had lied to him. Harry felt his stomach twisting up in knots, thinking of how all of this could have been avoided�He also explained how Snape had informed the Order about Harry�s warning and had given Umbridge fake Veritaserum to interrogate him and other students with. That, at least, made Harry feel somewhat better. It didn�t bring Ron back, though�None of it did and only succeeded in making him feel more and more guilty for leading his best friend to his doom.
�It is time,� Dumbledore finally said, �for me to tell you what I should have told you five years ago, Harry. Please, listen�I am going to tell you everything. I only ask for a little patience��
Patience?! Harry wanted to scream. He didn�t want to sit here and listen to anymore, though part of him was intrigued by whatever it was Dumbledore wanted to tell him. Nothing could be that important, could it? Not important enough to keep him from his friends when they needed him. To keep him from being able to mourn Ron the way he should. As Dumbledore spoke, though, he had Harry�s full attention. He tried not to, but found himself glaring at the headmaster, biting his tongue to keep himself from exploding in anger and frustration and impatience.
Dumbledore knew Harry had suffered, he said, in his life with the Dursleys. He wanted to keep him alive, blah blah blah. The protection of his mother�s blood�Dumbledore was talking about his first year at Hogwarts and Harry hoped that whatever this was had everything to do with that year. Harry didn�t want some long, flowery prelude to whatever it was Dumbledore wanted to tell him. He just wanted him to say it! Be blunt and get it over with. Harry didn�t care about anything else. What did any of this even matter? He spoke of his plan and decisions not to tell Harry each year he had been at Hogwarts so far. Discussing what took place each year he had been here. �JUST TELL ME THEN!� Harry wanted to scream at the top of his lungs, but found himself remaining still and silent as ever, listening to every word Dumbledore said, some sense of great anticipation upon him, eager to hear whatever it was Dumbledore was getting to and not willing to interrupt and waste more time.
�Voldemort tried to kill you when you were a child because of a prophecy made shortly before your birth,� Dumbledore finally said. A prophecy he had gone out to try to fulfill by killing Harry, and upon his failure was now determined to hear the prophecy in full. The Hall of Prophecies, Harry thought�Images flashed through his mind of glowing spheres crashing to the floor and the one he had been carrying falling to the floor.
�The prophecy�s smashed�� Harry said blankly, his voice weak and shaky, just as he had feared.
�The thing that smashed was merely the record of the prophecy kept by the Department of Mysteries,� Dumbledore explained. �But the prophecy was made to somebody and that person has the means of recalling it perfectly.�
�Who heard it?� Harry asked quietly, curiously. Who had heard the prophecy that Voldemort so craved? Who could very well be at risk, should Voldemort find them and know what they could tell him? What was this prophecy, of such importance that Voldemort had been eagerly searching for it all year? A prophecy about him�His stomach twisted painfully and he had to wonder if he even wanted to know it at all.
�I did,� Dumbledore said. Harry�s eyes grew wide as he finally let his wet green eyes turn to the older man as Dumbledore explained his meeting with an Divination professor applicatn at the Hog�s Head Inn. How unimpressive she had been until he turned to leave. On that note, Dumbledore stood and walked past Harry and his eyes eagerly followed the other wizard as he retrieved his Pensive, bringing it over to sit upon his desk. Harry�s heart was pounding wildly in his chest and he stared at the stone basin as Dumbledore placed his wand to his temple, pulling long silvery strands of thought out and placing them within the Pensive.
Unlike his previous experiences with Pensives, Harry did not have to get up and stick his head into the thing. Instead a figure rose out onto the surface, a small figure of Sibyll Trelawney. Her mouth opened, speaking in those harsh, hoarse tones he had heard her use once before.
�The one with the power to vanquish he Dark Lord approaches. Born to those who thrice have defied him. Born as the seventh month dies. And the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have the power the Dark Lord knows not. And either must die at the hand of the other, for neither can live while the other survives,� she said, a loud and panicked knock sounding on the door behind them midway through her speech so that Harry had to strain to hear the words. �The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies.�
The slowly revolving figure of his Divination professor slowly sank back down into the silvery mass below and vanished.
The rapid knocking on the door disrupted the momentary silence that had fallen upon the office.
�We shall continue momentarily, Harry,� Dumbledore said apologetically. �Come in!�
Harry turned as the door opened and in strode Professor Vector, the Arithmancy teacher. She was wearing a mauve colored nightgown with a midnight blue dressing robe draped over her shoulders. Her dark, curly hair was a tangled mess instead of the pristine braids she normally kept them in. There were dark shadows and bags beneath bloodshot eyes. �I apologize for my interruption, headmaster,� Vector said, nodding her head politely to both men. �It is important, though. I tried contacting Severus a while ago and never got a response�I don�t think he ever returned from the forest when he went searching for Potter,� Vector explained, worry clear in her pretty face. �Umbridge never emerged, either, from what I�ve heard�I�m worried, though. I don�t see why he would need to be gone this late, unless��
�Thank you, Professor Vector,� Dumbledore said with a frown, nodding his head and standing up. �I will see what I can find out.�
Vector nodded her head and left and Harry glanced up at Dumbledore in a panic. Snape was gone? He had gone into the Forbidden Forest to search for Harry. Whatever he might have felt in response was gone because all Harry could feel was worry. Snape was strong and clever. He could take care of himself. But like Vector had said, why would he be gone so long? Voldemort could have called him, Harry supposed, but somehow that didn�t comfort him much.
�We will have to discuss this more tomorrow, Harry. You should go to bed now,� Dumbledore said.
�But, sir--� Harry began to argue.
�Good night, Harry,� Dumbledore said, leaving the office without another word.
Harry just stared after him for a moment, heart pounding loudly in his chest, a steady thumping felt throughout his body. He couldn�t just stay here! His best friend had just died saving him, and now Snape could very well be out there, hurt because he had been trying to help him! His mother had died saving him�Harry couldn�t just sit back and let everyone he cared about be hurt and die because of him! Harry didn�t know what to think or what to expect, but he did know that he was not going to bed.
�Accio Invisibility Cloak!� Harry whispered and he crept to the door of Dumbledore�s office, opening it and looking down both ways. Dumbledore was no where to be seen, nor was his Cloak. Still, Harry waited quietly until he heard a strange whistling sound and suddenly his arms were full of his Cloak. Harry hastily grabbed it and closed the office door, tugging the Cloak over his body as he hurried down the stairs and out into the corridor. He knew he should be quiet, as to not alert anyone in the castle to his presence, but most people were sleeping and he doubted he had much to worry about except maybe Mr. Filch and Mrs. Norris. Harry didn�t have it in him to care as he launched into a full out run, pushing himself as hard as he could to the entrance hall, pleased to find the door unlocked. Harry slipped out, spotting a tiny dot in the distance disappearing into the trees�Dumbledore, no doubt.
Dumbledore could save him, Harry thought, but he kept going, running across the grounds towards the forest. Dumbledore was the most powerful wizard in the world, but Harry couldn�t just sit back and do nothing. He had to do this. At least the sun had started to rise, so it wasn�t so dark out anymore�It would be a bit easier and he wouldn�t have to alert anyone or anything to his presence too much using Lumos.
Harry was sore and out of breath the time he reached the forest and he leaned against a tree for a moment, catching his breath before stumbling between the trees. Harry swallowed hard as he looked around at the trees. He remembered how to get to Grawp, but other than that�Harry didn�t exactly know the forest all that well. He didn�t even know where to start looking. Harry was tempted to take that more familiar path they had traveled to visit Hagrid�s little brother, but instead he took another path. Snape could be anywhere�Harry wracked his brain, trying to think of any spells that might help him on his search.
�Accio Snape!� Harry whispered desperately, bracing himself and half expecting the taller man to fly towards him at any moment. He was disappointed when he didn�t. Harry frowned and tried to think of something else. He could try Summoning something of Snape�s that might tell him what direction Snape was in. But other than his wand, Harry wasn�t sure what else he would have on him for sure and how much he would need to Summon before he was able to locate the man. Besides, if Snape was here, Harry couldn�t leave him defenseless without his wand.
The forest seemed so peaceful right now, it was almost wrong. Light barely poured in through the treetops above, enough to keep the large forest from looking as dreary as it did by night. There was the light sound of wind rolling through and the rustling of leaves and some of the branches swayed gracefully. Harry didn�t see much movement or the noises of animals or other creatures, though that didn�t necessarily mean anything.
After a while, Harry started to feel hopeless. Where to go and what to do. Dumbledore could have very well gotten both Umbridge and Snape by now, couldn�t he? Harry shook his head and kept walking, eyes peeled for anything, desperately thinking of something that might be able to help.
Maybe Summoning would help�If he just kept trying things. Figuring there was nothing else he could do, Harry focused on Snape. �Accio Snape�s�potions?� Harry said, not sure if the man carried potions on him or not. He remained still for a moment, holding his wand steadily, green eyes scanning around the forest. After a moment his shoulders dropped and he sighed and almost that exactly moment he felt something zoom past his ear from behind, coming around to land in his hands. Harry spun around, seeing another shoot out at him from somewhere to the left. Harry grabbed the vial and placed it in his hand with the other, moving quickly in the direction they had come from as another soared into his hand. He moved more quickly, nearly tripping over a stack of fallen branches. He stumbled over them and just barely regained balance as two more came to rest in his arms, from somewhere to the right now. Harry moved quickly in that direction, but after a moment he realized no more were coming. Harry quickly stuffed the vials into his pockets and his arm shook slightly in excitement and fear as he raised his wand. �Accio Snape�s�quill,� he said, a moment later realizing that was probably stupid. Who randomly carried quills on them? Hermione, maybe, but it seemed like an odd thing just to have in your robes. �Accio Snape�s watch!� he called out.
To his surprise a gold pocket watch zoomed into his arms and Harry grasped it and placed it in his pocket, as well, walking more quickly in that direction, looking on either side of him as he moved, so fast he was making himself dizzy and he could feel a headache coming on. He came to a halt when he saw something move, but after a moment discovered it was just an owl pecking at something on the ground and it quickly flew back upwards after a moment. Muttering under his breath, Harry continued onward. He moved with determination, still thinking of random things Snape might have on him that he could try Summoning.
�Accio Snape�s�button!� Harry whispered desperately, wondering if he could Summon just a button from the man�s robes. After a moment, though, a rather big black button flew into his hand from the left. Harry turned and quickly moved in that direction, only having to move between two nearby trees before finally spotting the man.
Snape was laying on the ground, his head and part of his shoulders propped up by a tree trunk. He looked paler than usual, his black eyes barely squinting open. His breathing was ragged and Harry noticed his hand twitching where he was grasping his wand tightly. He didn�t look too bad�He was still alive, at least, Harry thought gratefully, grinning as he ran forward. �Snape!� he cried, running forward, feeling like his heart might burst from joy at the weak smirk Snape managed.
�Potter,� Snape said, voice hoarse and low. �Do I have you to�bl�ame for my�sudden�disappearing�objects?�
�Sorry,� Harry said, falling to his knees by the man�s side. �I was trying to find you.�
�Wh�y?�
�Vector was worried about you�Said you had come out here looking for me�that you hadn�t come back yet�� Harry admitted, anxiously looking Snape over. His robes looked a little wet and he had a bit of mud smudged over his hand and his neck. It was so strange to see him laying this way, so weak�He must have put up a lot of work finding him, probably had to fight off angry centaurs or even running away from Grawp. Harry couldn�t even begin to imagine what Snape had been through, but he was fine and that was all that mattered.
�Yes, well�You should get back, Potter�The Forbidden Forest is�forbidden�for good reason�� he rasped. �Dangerous�Go back��
�No,� Harry said immediately, reaching out to grab the man. �Let me help you.�
Snape hissed as Harry reached for his arm and Harry jerked away, wondering what had happened. �Go back, Potter�I will�not forgive you if you�die�out here�playing her�o.�
Harry glared at the man and reached out to grab him again, deciding to be more careful and to avoid his arm. As he reached out, though, he noticed that the wetness he had felt on his hand was red. And sticky. His stomach twisted nauseatingly. He stared down in horror at the man�s soaked robes, reaching out with a trembling hand to touch the wetness there. He pulled his hand away, covered in more blood. He felt dizzy�The entire world swayed dangerously and Harry swallowed hard.
�Where�ah�did the�blood come from?� Harry asked weakly, hoping Snape had slain some evil monster or another.
�Me, Potter,� Snape replied, voice attempting sarcasm.
�But�� Harry said, reaching out to help him up. �We have to get you to the infirmary! Madam Pomfrey can help you!�
�Do not touch me! My arm is broken,� Snape snarled, cringing as Harry�s hands came close to his arm. Harry pulled back again and stared at Snape in alarm.
�You�re bleeding a lot, Snape! We have to get you help,� Harry said.
�I�ll likely�be dead�before we reached the�castle,� Snape explained.
�No!� Harry hissed. Dead. Snape couldn�t die�Dead like his parents, like Ron, like Cedric�Harry hadn�t fully accepted that Ron was gone, let alone having to lose Snape, too! Fear unlike anything he had experienced gripped him. He breathed deeply, quickly, feeling on the verge of hyperventilation. He couldn�t do that, though�Not here and now when he had to help Snape. �No, we�re going to get you help��
�Harry,� the man said, surprising Harry by the sound of his name, finally, falling from the man�s thin lips. �Look at me,� he whispered. Harry obeyed, feeling his heart breaking at the sight of those familiar black eyes, almost scared to look into them and see the light leave them�Terrified of seeing them as empty and lifeless as Ron�s. And Cedric�s. �I�love�you.�
It should have been the happiest moment of his life�Like a dream come true. He had been dreaming about the man all year�Had known how deep his feelings were for months now�He had never expected to hear Snape say them. He felt a small burst of happiness, ruined by the incredible panic and pain that followed. Snape wouldn�t be telling him this. Not unless he actually thought he was going to die�And even then it was hard to believe Snape would actually say them.
�I love you, too,� Harry admitted, heart swelling up painfully and tears filling his eyes for the second time that day.
�Then go,� Snape whispered. �Please,� he whispered. �Please�go. Be�safe.�
�No�I�m going to help you�I promise, you�re going to be fine. Snape! Snape, stay awake! You�re going to live and everything�s going to be fine!� Harry said, anxiously pulling the potions out of his pocket. �Will any of these help you?�
Snape only chuckled weakly, his dark eyes fluttering shut. Harry figured that to mean he had asked a stupid question. If any of them could have helped, wouldn�t Snape had taken one already? Harry dropped them to the forest floor and reached out to shake Snape. �Snape! Snape, open your eyes! Snape!� he yelled in a panic. His head bobbed from side to side a bit, but his eyes remained closed.
No. He could not be dead. Inside, Harry felt as though his heart and soul were being ripped to shreds mercilessly. His arms trembled lightly and tears were clouding his vision. �DUMBLEDORE!� Harry shouted. �PROFESSOR! PROFESSOR DUMBLEDORE, HELP!� Harry screamed as loudly as he could. He scrambled to his feet and tried to clear his brain enough to perform any magic that might be useful. �PROFESSOR!� Harry continued to shout, not caring about what attention he was bringing to himself as he tried to pull Snape up, but he stumbled under the man�s weight and carefully laid him back down. �Wing�Wingardium�� he began, his arm trembling as he pointed his wand at Snape, figuring he could use the Hover Charm to bring Snape back into the castle.
Before he could finish the spell, Snape was lifted off of the ground gracefully and Harry spun around to see Dumbledore there, an unconscious Umbridge levitating by his side. Harry watched as Snape glided slowly to Dumbledore�s other side. Dumbledore didn�t seem too surprised or angry to see him. �Let�s go, Harry,� Dumbledore said quietly. Harry nodded and anxiously followed after Dumbledore, Snape, and Umbridge. He felt weak, like he could barely keep himself moving, though he pushed through the dizziness and weakness to keep going. Now and then muscles in his leg would twitch violently enough to make him think he was going to fall, though he would grip a tree and managed to regain balance before following after the trio ahead of him.
Snape wasn�t dead. He couldn�t be dead. He wasn�t dying�He was going to be fine, Harry told himself, wiping his bloodied hands on his pants. It had been a lot of blood, Harry thought to himself�His robes had been completely soaked. What had even happened to him? Who or what had done that to him? There were so many questions, so many things he wanted to know. His bright green eyes focused on the floating black figure, praying to any deity that existed that he would survive and be okay. He had never wanted anything so desperately in his life. But he couldn�t lose someone else he loved. Harry would have gladly done anything�anything at all, to assure that Snape survived.
�Harry, you should return to Gryffindor Tower, my boy,� Dumbledore said as they reached the doors to the castle.
�Sir, I can�t! I�I want to be sure Snape will be okay,� Harry said, trying to keep his voice steady. He swallowed hard.
�Professor Snape,� Dumbledore corrected him. �And you can see him tomorrow morning. I really must insist that you go to bed now�You need your rest.�
�Professor! I can�t�I can�t just go back there and just�wait! I�I need to be with him, please,� Harry begged, wanting to reach out and grab him and beg and plead with him to let him be able to stay with Snape, honestly not caring what it looked like at this point.
Dumbledore was quiet for a moment as the doors opened for them and they stepped into the silent entrance hall. �I cannot permit you to wander around, especially bothering patients�You know how Madam Pomfrey can be,� Dumbledore said. �I�ll have to tell you to wait until a proper time.� Harry frowned deeply, resisting the urge to snap before opening his mouth again, but Dumbledore beat him to it. �I do think you should wash up before bed, though�And I do hope you didn�t leave that Cloak of yours in the forest.�
The headmaster smiled, a kind twinkle in his blue eyes, though he seemed just as concerned as Harry as he led the two off to the infirmary. Harry stared after him for a moment before darting off to the nearest boy�s bathroom. Clean up, he told himself�He didn�t need Snape�s blood on him or all of this dirt�And he needed to give Pomfrey time to look over Snape before he snuck in. She would heal him and he would be fine and everything would be perfect.
In the bathroom, Harry left his Cloak by the door and rushed to one of the sinks, turning on the faucet and letting the cold water run over his hands. He wanted to hurry�He felt too anxious to just stand here, but he couldn�t go just yet. He needed to wait, he reminded himself. He lathered his hands up with lots of soap and focused on scrubbing himself clean instead, ignoring the way his arms still trembled.
Snape would be fine�
But what if he wasn�t? What if he had been right�? What if he was gone, too? Harry thought of Ron, laying dead in the Department of Mysteries�He imagined Snape on that forest floor, staring up at him with those same dead eyes. He blinked furiously, trying to force the images to go away, but they haunted him, taunted him, tortured him. His arms shook harder and he scrubbed his hands harder, blinking away the tears that filled his eyes once again.
He began shaking his head furiously, refusing to believe any of it. They couldn�t be dead. Two of the people he cared about most in the world�Ron couldn�t be dead. Snape�Nothing could hurt Snape! He was strong and brilliant and powerful and�He couldn�t� just bleed to death in the forest. No�He needed them far too much. This was all just a bad dream�A very horrible nightmare.
Harry grasped the sides of the sink when it became too much, choking back a sob. He held himself up by gripping the sink, quite sure his legs were ready to give out completely. He couldn�t break down right now. There was no reason for it to hurt this much. No reason to feel pain at all.
It was fine.
Everything had to be just fine.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
Author�s Note: Good news�Sirius is alive! Bad news�Ron isn�t.
I�m not sure how some parts were, but I feel weird about just copying from Order of the Phoenix and I�ve done that enough, really, without going through a bunch of other stuff�so I summarized some things and especially the whole thing with the Department of Mysteries, I figured it was best to just offer up bits and pieces up until we get to Ron�s death.
Anyway, I hope everyone enjoyed it! Please review if you did, you know they make me happy! Lol. It didn�t turn out as long as I thought it would, but it�s still a pretty decent length, methinks.
On another note, I�ve nearly finished planning the sequel to this story (funny, since I�m not even halfway through writing this one). But I have many ideas and I like having it all worked out, so what the hell! I can promise Lost and Damned will have at least two sequels, but I�ll let everyone know more about that later on.
Thanks so much everyone who has reviewed so far! Chapter title lyrics from �This is War� by 30 Seconds to Mars.
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Lost and Damned