Toppers Wallow

For a change Draco woke before Harry. He shook his partner awake.



“I was having such a lovely dream.” Harry mumbled.



“Yes I can see you were. Who was the lucky guy?”



“You were, of course. I think you’d better ravish me for real.”



“Sorry, but I don’t have a white charger and a cape.”



“Perhaps not, but your sword is demanding attention.”



“I fancy a salacious shower, are you coming?”



“Now and in a few minutes, Lover.”



Soapy bodies slithering together soon had sexy outpourings. Kissing, they indulged in seconds under the sluicing steamy water.



Breakfast over, Gregory offered to help with transport to the ministry, so each of them side-along Apparated a young Muggle. There were the usual security checks and they all collected visitors badges. The medallions’ magical aura fooled the wand weighing clerk. Only when the trio took them off was he satisfied that they were not entitled to wands.



“Those are strong charms Mr Potter.”



“Mr Malfoy partnered me in making them.”



“Oh! I’d heard you were working as a team; now I’ve seen the proof. Have a good day.”



“Bloody Americanisms,” Draco mumble-grumbled. “Attending court is definitely not a good day, for anyone; even witnesses.”



The Muggle trio were all eyes and ears, gawping at the surroundings of the Ministry. All kinds of people greeted Harry and quite a few said their hellos to Draco too, even Gregory got a few nods. Having delivered their charges into the Aurors’ hands, the magical trio went to find seats in the public gallery. The Wizengamot was well attended; there were just five seats left. Ron and Hermione claimed the remaining two; a couple of minutes after the others had seated themselves.



“Ron grumbled. “That toad with a bow in her hair seems to have wheedled her way into the Minister’s good books again.”



Harry looked where Ron had indicated; Dolores Umbridge was in the official enclosure. “She could smarm her way up a sparrow’s backside,” Harry agreed.



“No need to be crude, Harry. I prefer Ron’s toad with a bow description.” Despite her remonstrance Hermione was giggling.



“She let us get at you Gryffindor’s, though,” Draco stirred. “So she must have had some good ideas.



Ron playfully thumped Draco’s shoulder and he pretended it hurt.



“Shh, shh. If you youngsters can’t behave …” An older wizard turned round. “Oh! Sorry Mr Potter, I didn’t know it was you.”



“I reckon they’d let you get away with a public striptease, and still apologise,” Draco whispered.



“For you, Darling, anything; when would you like me to start?” Harry breathed archly in Draco’s ear, giving his thigh a caressing squeeze. The other three caught on and giggled.



They became serious when Marcus and the other prisoners were brought into the pit under Auror escort. Once seated, the chains on the arms of the chairs secured them. The charges were read out, and then the various depositions. The villains disputed everything, but the evidence mounted against them. Other witnesses spoke out and eventually the Muggle trio were asked about what had happened. There were gasps as the boys graphically described what had been done to them and how they had been tempted and coerced.



The chief Judge asked Wash if he could identify the perpetrators. He pointed at the accused and then looked round the court benches.



“That witch up there,” he said. “She was the one who played with our willies.”



“Which one?” Amelia asked.



“The one sitting three seats away from you, with a bow in her hair.”



Dolores put on a sickly winning smile. “The Muggle must be ensorcelled. I’m a Ministry official; one of my enemies has done this.”



“Have the witnesses been checked for Imperio and other coercive spells, Mr Auror?



“Yes, Madam Chair. None of them showed any signs of enscorcelling.”



“Thank you Mr Auror. Madam Umbridge, no doubt you will let your wand be subject to prior incantatem?” Amelia asked, holding out her hand. “That should prove your innocence.



“I’m a Ministry Official. I will not be degraded by such a demand.” Dolores stood and attempted to walk out in high dudgeon.



Unfortunately for her Chief Auror Dawlish was her next door neighbour. “The Wizengamot’s chief judge has just asked for your wand, madam. You will give it up, or be arrested.”



There was a brief struggle, Dawlish incarcerated Umbridge, removed her wand and gave it to Amelia Bones. She looked round.



“Mr Potter, would you be so good as to perform the charm for the court, please? Your excellent impartial reputation is known to all.”



Harry came down to the official box, took the wand putting it in the clip so that everyone could see. “Priori Incatato,” he pronounced, pointing his finger at the wand in the clip. The Wizengamot members gasped in surprise at Harry’s inadvertent demonstration of wandless magic. Most of wand’s the latest spells appeared to be about fluffy cats. Next came ones of a darker hue. Three boys tortured. Transformation into a pretty girl. More fluffy cats. Tied, unidentified young men being made to have sex with each other. Then came fluffy cats again. Cats and coercive spells alternated until eventually even the spell creating Harry’s ‘I must not tell lies’ quill was revealed.



“Thank you Mr Potter. Please stop. I think the wand’s evidence speaks for itself. Dolores Jane Umbridge you are hereby accused of sundry heinous crimes. Auror Dawlish please place her with the rest of the accused?”



“Deletrius,” Harry pronounced, and all the images melted away. As he went back to his seat, Harry saw a gaudily dressed Rita Skeeter busy with her automatic pink quill and smiling gleefully. The rest of the trial was an anticlimax. As expected, all the prisoners including Dolores were sent to Azkaban.



Francis collared the boys as they left court and asked Harry and the four others if they would be witnesses to the property documents.



“If you had someone to buy the farm immediately, it would save you an awful lot of money, you know,” Francis informed Wash.



“I can give you a cheque straight away, Francis,” Harry said. “I have enough funds to cover this, and more besides.”



“Just a moment Harry.” Francis went through some parchments in his briefcase. “Ah yes! I have the document here. It will only take a couple of minutes to fill it in.”



Half an hour later, Harry was the new master of Woodyates Farm; duly recognised and certificated by the Ministry. A quick floo to Gringott’s confirmed the money was available and the Magical Properties Registrar was all smiles and handshakes.



“A pleasure to do business with you, Mr Potter.” Offering Harry a slack and clammy handshake plus an insincere smile.



Five magicians and three medallioned Muggles exited to Diagon Alley on their way to Gringott’s. Of course the trio were just as bedazzled as Billy had been. Harry had to admit that it had fully regained its prosperous air. Fortescue had expanded and was offering lunchtime snacks, so he received eight savoury orders as well as the obligatory multi-hued ice-creams to finish with. Harry had trouble in paying, as the owner wished to give him the meal. Harry insisted in covering the bill and a reluctant Fortescue eventually gave in. Hermione, Ron and Gregory promised to show the Medallioned trio round the rest of the shops, promising a look at 3W’s and the Honeydukes branch, whilst Harry and Draco called in on Griphook.



He was not at his usual desk.



“Where’s Griphook, please.” He asked the goblin teller.



“Supervisor Grumbleweed is in his office Mr Potter. He’s expecting you; I’ll take you to him.”



They went behind the desk and up a few steps into a glass fronted office. Griphook was seated at the desk looking out through the windows at his group of cashiers.



“Messrs Potter and Malfoy, Sir,” announced the teller retiring through the door and closing it.



“Hello Harry and Draco. Do you like my new office? It is thanks to you that I was given the promotion yesterday. Justin got his father to entrust his accounts and investments to me, their millions are greater than the Malfoy millions ever were, even at their peak.”



“You know I have bought Woodyates, Don’t you?”



“Yes Harry. Will you be insuring it through the bank?”



“Of course!”



“Good, that means my portfolio will still be worth much the same.” Griphook rubbed his hands together.



“I intend buying Milkwood farm as well, Griphook; once the proceeds of the Scottish sale have been credited to my account. Do you think my father will cut up rough when he finds out?” Draco asked.



“The Supervisors feel that it is a likely outcome, so the thirteen of us would like to learn your mirror defences, please. We’ll assemble in the boardroom in half an hour’s time. Would it be possible to teach the senior tellers as well, please? There are twenty six of them so they’ll attend in two shifts.”



“No problem, have they all brought fire-staffs with them?”



“Of course; like your wands, our fire-staffs are always with us.”



“Good! We’ve adapted the spell, or should I say Hermione and Hamish have, so that your fire-staffs can be the instruments. Hermione’s of the opinion that your fire-staffs as just as competent as our wands. In any case, much of the effectiveness depends on the magical talent of the holder.”



“So you mean all this fuss, about us being jealous of you wand-holders, is just a lot of hot air?” Griphook had a quizzical smile.



“Yes. Though I’d rather be more diplomatic and say it was the result of a longstanding misunderstanding.” Harry held his hands out placatingly.



“So Gregorian doesn’t need to use that wand I bought him after all.”



“Let him try both media, see which suits him.” Draco suggested. “Ron tried Hamish’s fire-staff and found he rather liked the feel. He says it’s sturdier than a wand; he has a habit of breaking his wands so he’s bought himself a fire-staff. Harry’s DADA will include use of staffs, wands and elfin rings, so that each student can find which he or she is most happy with. Incidentally, we now have some elfin applicants. It was a lack of literacy that was holding them back, not that we knew. Kreacher’s going to help with that side of the learning.”



“Talking about school, Minerva’s asked me to become a governor. I think that was the clincher with our governors when they decide to promote me.” Griphook buffed his fingernails on his lapel, and looked pleased.



“Congratulations, we seem to be picking up friends in high places.”



“Harry, don’t put yourself down. It’s us who are grateful for your influence.”



“Any more of this comradely backslapping and I think I’ll puke.” Draco picked up the waste basket and mimed theatrically.



“He won’t, will he?” Griphook looked serious. “My authority is too new to extend to telling a cashier to clear up the mess.”



Draco looked up, realising that Griphook had taken him literally. “Oops, sorry. I didn’t mean … You bastard, you were having me on.”



Harry enjoyed seeing Draco bested and joined in the laughter.



“I hope I’m not interrupting something important.” A goblin head poked round the door. “The others are assembled in the boardroom, Griphook.”



“No Hangdog, I was just pulling sober-sides Malfoy’s leg.”



“Pleased to meet you Sober-sides.” Hangdog held out his hand. He was bemused when the three incumbents burst out laughing again.



Griphook explained to Hangdog as they walked to the boardroom. Firstly he blushed and then roared with laughter at his mistake.



“You know, I always thought goblins were dour.” Draco giggled. “I must say it’s very refreshing to know you have a sense of humour.”



“There are a couple who don’t, least not that we’ve managed to find. We always thought wizards were dominating bastards. Revelations all round, I think.” Hangdog clapped Draco hard on the shoulders; Draco tried hard not to wince.



Griphook introduced them to the assembled supervisors, saying they were honoured to have Harry and Draco with them. Hangdog made a couple of remarks about senses of humour. Draco repeated the results of Hermione’s and Hamish’s deliberations about the affinity of fire-sticks to wands. And Harry made a short ‘comrades in arms’ speech. Then they got down to the mirror defences.



Once the basics had been learnt the assembly practiced in order to sharpen up their reactions. Some of the goblins conjured wide brimmed Stetsons and pretended to be American cowboys. As well as learning they had a lot of fun, ending up with a short game of hex tennis. Harry and Draco stored the cowboy idea up for further development.



The senior tellers’ groups were much the same, once the ice had been broken. One set invented a stalking game and the other group set up a look-alike of the front of house, working out angles and sharpening their sit-to-stand responses. Draco and Harry were still there when the bank prepared to close its doors. Ron, Gregory, Hermione and the three medallion holders slipped in just as time was called. As they came over to join their friends the last bolt clanged too and all hell let loose in the main hall. The five magicians grabbed their wands, looking for attackers and formed a protective barrier round the Muggles. What they found however was something entirely different.



Supervisors and seniors were all teaching their excited underlings. Hangdog got someone to show the three Muggles around the premises, whilst the five magicians split up and walked round, correcting and tutoring as necessary. By-and-large the tickling charm was used as the aggressive hex and it was not unknown for goblins gleefully to try and hex someone who wasn’t their designated opponent. It felt like a real battle environment, especially when the magicians joined in the mêlée. After about an hour, a bell rang. Everybody stopped, adopted dour faces, and lined up in ranks facing the main dais.



“Fellow goblins, on your behalf I would like to thank our tutors for their kind assistance,” Hangdog started. “As chief supervisor it falls to me to make a small presentation. Miss Granger, as inventor of the mirror defence, Gringott\'s has voted you this year’s medal of excellence and a small pension to support it.



“Harry! You knew.” Hermione hissed as she went to receive the award. Harry just smiled and ushered her forward.



“Thank you chief supervisor and members of Gringott\'s; I had no idea that this presentation was in store for me. I shall have words with Mr Potter afterwards for this deception.”



That brought forth some quiet laughter.



“Like the boy-who-lived, I am dedicated to a more equal world, where we co-operate using our best talents for the good of all. You know, no doubt, of my efforts for the emancipation of house-elves. Don’t worry, I’m not about to attempt any polemic here.”



Some dramatic sighs of relief.



“Besides I think my comrades over there would hex me if I did.”



This time the laughter was greater.



“Thank you for this presentation, I shall treasure it. Let ‘Vive la difference and work together’ be our motto.”



Hermione had hit the right note and received a loud acclamation as she went back to her place. The bell clanged again.



“Magical Brothers, Sister Magician and Fellows of Gringott\'s please come through, our buffet is waiting.”



Hangdog guided the guests through the throng. Some of the goblins made laughing remarks as they passed, Draco was in his element, indulging in quick-witted repartee.



“I’m sorry Harry.” Hangdog looked solemn. “We have a special table of wizard food for you, but do Muggles eat different foods?”



“I think the food set out … blow you and your sense of humour.” Harry went to hit Hangdog on the shoulder. “Okay, you nearly caught me. I must say I wasn’t prepared for a meal.”



“This is just a light snack, Harry”



“I wondered where all those heavy bellies came from.”



“Okay, truce. One of us might just cross the line of good taste without noticing. Rita Skeeter would have a field day. Can you see the headlines? ‘Potter is defeated in another attempt on Gringott\'s’, or maybe ‘Not content with putting a Ministry official inside, Potter attacks Gringott\'s’.”



“How about: ‘Are your Galleons safe with Gringott\'s?’ Our reporter has inside information that Potter and his cronies have been hexing all the Gringott\'s goblins.” Harry suggested.



“Imagine Friday’s headlines; ‘The Master attacks Gringott’s, but Potter beat him to it – there was nothing left.”



“She’d probably rehash the ‘Malfoy has Potter under Imperio’ theme and insert Draco instead of Lucius.”



“All very interesting friends, but your attack earlier in the year has made us re-think our whole security strategy. Dragons are out; that poor thing was a left-over liability from the middle ages. The identity revealers have been enhanced and various Muggle invented quick operating grilles installed. We’ve also started an inventory of magical articles and are crosschecking it with the stolen items list, the forbidden objects record and a few other catalogues. There will be a number of persons and families with some awkward explaining to do.”



“I bet Mundungus will head the list,” Ron suggested.



“I imagine the Malfoys will figure prominently,” Draco put in. “Father used to boast about his hoard of illegal objects.”



“Yes, well, that family has had many of its assets frozen pending a judicial investigation. I think that was one of the reasons Lucius chose to sell the Scottish estate. To say the least he’s not very liquid at the moment.”



“Would you like two of us to be here, but invisible, tomorrow?”



“I could do with as many honest reinforcements as possible. There are a couple of Aurors coming and Minerva’s promised some Order members. Why only two invisible ones?”



“When we were younger and smaller three of us could hide under my invisibility cloak.”



“Okay I get the picture, Harry. Six or eight sets of mobile shoes with no bodies attached would be slightly obvious, even in the magician’s bank.” Hangdog gave a brief smile.



“Too many of us will alert him. Is he likely to bring a posse with him? We could have reinforcements in the neighbouring shops in case he comes with many.” Ron, the tactician, suggested.



“That’s a good idea, he’s due after lunch sometime.”



“Right! We’ll get Dumbledore’s Army organised, just in case. Ron’s our general, Draco and I will be under the cloak, Greg and Hermione can quietly liaise with the hidden ones using the medallions.”



“We’ll use the ‘E’ for dire emergency situations. Griphook do you still have your medallion?”



“Yes Ron. Here it is.”



“Right, let me show you how to communicate using it, this is another of Hermione’s inventions.”



Ron and Griphook sat down in a corner and practiced.



“Hermione, did you know that Gringott’s have an experimental bursary, aimed at encouraging new uses for magic. I’m sure a suitable application from yourself would receive favourable attention. Not that I can tell what the committee’s final decision would be.” Hangdog suggested.



“Thanks for that, I didn’t know about it. I’m fairly committed this coming year, but maybe for next year?” Hermione looked hopeful.



“Get your application in soon, the committee takes ages to confer.”



The Muggle trio arrived in the hall. Griphook had arranged for them to have a cart tour of the vaults, with a visit to the goblin precious metal display.



“Thanks very much Griphook, it was great. Billy told us about the carts from when he came with Harry, but experiencing them is much better. Xenon showed us the Gryffindor sword and told us of its recent uses. Did you really kill a basilisk with it Harry?” Cole was wide eyed with excitement.



“I’ve met Neville; you wouldn’t think he had it in him to chop an enormous snake up with it, would you?” Grey added.



“Xenon told us about a goblin king and a wizard who’d had a dispute over it. Two quite different stories as to whom it belongs,” continued Wash.



“I thought it was in your vault, Griphook?”



“It was; then we decided on the display idea. There are quite a few goblin made objects which wizards occasionally use magically. So in the spirit of ‘Entente Cordiale’ we have grouped them together in a safeguarded display area, with special magical channels to the entitled user magicians. I think your three young men are the first visitors to be shown round. We intend making it available by application. Hamish has already asked for access during his magical beings classes, perhaps your DADA classes might find some of the artefacts interesting.”



“Thanks Griphook, will you be issuing a catalogue?”



“Hogwarts will have one, as will the Ministry. Each entitled magician and donating goblin may have one if they ask.”



“What about historical family heirlooms,” Draco asked.



“Not thought about that, Draco. We’d need an approval committee and some guidelines set down. However I can’t see anything to block the idea, I’ll come back to you on that,” Hangdog replied.



“Some Muggle museums lend items out,” Wash interjected. “We had all kinds of interesting things at school. They were booked in advance and the lesson centred round them, it brought the teaching alive, not just boring books all the time”



“Okay Wash, that’s another idea to consider, ‘relevance’ was the idea behind the collection to begin with. I wonder if the elves have special things?”



“I’ll ask our elves for you if you like, Hangdog. Kreacher’s well read and Dorothy seems to know a lot about history so Marianne says.”



“Thanks Cole it would be very useful to have that input.”



“There’s a plaque on the wall in our church celebrating a witch being buried in consecrated ground by us Muggles. I’ve done some brass-rubbing so I could give you a copy,” Wash suggested.



“That starts a new line of thinking, perhaps it’s more in the region of Hogwarts Library. Draco and Hermione, you’re supposed to be bookworms and on good terms with Madam Pince, why not suggest that to her. She was given a number of rare goblin books and has promised to recondition them ready for preservation. I suspect that she will be doing for books what we’re doing for artefacts.” Hangdog looked hopeful.



Other ideas were swapped some in a joking manner; a number of Fellows came up and wished the VIP party goodnight and once the hall was past half empty the Godric’s Hollow party excused themselves and Apparated away, Ron and Hermione went back to the Burrow, saying they would contact the DA members; Gregory flooed Blaise to see if he wanted to attend.



It was kiss and cuddles that night in the Harry/Draco bedroom; they did a little ‘what-if’ planning but soon dozed off, comfortable in each other’s arms.