Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Someone Like You, Someone Like Me...	By : Kimmimaru Category: Harry Potter AU/AR > Slash - Male/Male Views: 4901 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters or settings by JK Rowling. I make no profit from this story.

Chapter List
- 2
- 3
- 4
Chapter Two

Sirius pressed his lips against James’ the feel of them so familiar, so comforting that he forgot everything else. He wrapped his arms around James’ neck, sitting in his lap as he felt his lover’s hands fisting in his shirt at his back. He sighed softly as he met James’ tongue within the confines of their mouths, his body vibrated with pleasure as James ran his hands slowly up his back and down his arms and gave a soft little moan.

The door to the dorm opened as Remus came in. “Well, I’ve had enough of that library to last me a thousand yea-” He stopped mid-sentence and his eyes went wide as he gazed at the scene before him; Sirius sat in James’ lap with his arms firmly around his neck and their lips pressed against each other. It was a scene he had witnessed many times before, and it had never even made him bat an eyelid but now…now he felt as if something was trying to claw its way through his skin. Someone else had their hands all over his mate. Someone else was tasting those lips, someone else had one hand inside Sirius’ shirt. A wave of intense dizziness overcame him and he stumbled backwards, a familiar and feared pain tore at his chest, his skin felt as if it was crawling, alive with millions of tiny insects that were intent upon bursting through every pour on his body. He gasped and caught himself on the wall, his nails tearing into the paper as he tried to regain some control.

Sirius yanked himself away from James’ embrace, falling backwards and off of the bed onto the floor. “Ow!” He exclaimed and sat up in time to see Remus crouched in the corner and gripping his head with both hands.

“Remus!” James leapt off the bed and ran to his friend’s side, he reached out but before he could touch him Remus growled. The sound so wolf-like it made James back off.

Sirius stood up and leapt over the bed to kneel before Remus, he grabbed his face in both hands, his eyes fearful. “Remus!” He gasped as he gazed straight into Amber eyes, guilt stabbed painfully at him and he gritted his teeth. “I’m sorry.” He breathed and saw Remus’ eyes darken slightly.

“S-Sirius?” He whispered hoarsely and suddenly pushed him to the floor, he gazed down at his mate and there was pain in his eyes.

James watched as Remus bent his head and suddenly bit down on Sirius’ exposed shoulder, Sirius tensed and closed his eyes, his teeth appearing from beneath his bottom lip. He watched and had to force himself not to throw Remus off, for risk of incurring the wrath of the werewolf. He looked away and closed his eyes, lowering his head as he heard Sirius’ gasps of pain as Remus re-staked his claim on his body.

“R-Remus…” Sirius whispered and lifted his hands, pushing his fingers into Remus’ hair. Once again he felt that flood of desperate animal-like emotion. His body craved Remus desperately, his mind would always want James. Yet his heart never wanted to hurt anyone. He gazed up into Remus’ toffee coloured eyes and watched tears sliding down his cheeks, gently he wiped them away. “I’m so sorry.” He breathed and leaned up to plant a kiss on those lips, they were soft and sent thrills shooting down his spine but they weren’t James’. “Can you…forgive me?” he asked, still holding Remus’ head still gently.

Remus choked on grief before nodding slowly. “Siri…James…I-I…I’m sorry…I can’t control myself…I wish I…I wish…”

“I know.” Sirius whispered softly. “I know, Remus.”

James sighed and leaned against the wall, slowly he slipped down it and buried his face in his palms. “Yeah, we understand Moons. Don’t worry, I-I’ll…I won’t do something like that again. I’m sorry, mate.”

Remus sat up and moved away from Sirius’ prone form. He put his head in his hands and sighed heavily, the strain on his nerves was almost too much and he was having difficulty separating the wolf’s jealous rage from his own feelings. He was consumed by guilt and the agony of knowing he was hurting both of his best friends, friends who had gone to so much trouble to help him. He felt arms around him, soft breath on his neck and the wolf within rumbled happily. Sirius’ scent surrounded him and soothed the brutal beast that shared his soul. “Forgive me, Remus.” Sirius breathed, his fingers going to his mates hair and gliding through it as he hid his face from the world in Remus’ shirt.

“You have nothing to apologise for, Sirius. This…everything is my fault.”

James watched the pair of them with dark eyes, he pushed back his own pain. “No, it’s you who shouldn’t feel guilty.” He said roughly. “It’s not like you deliberately set out to break us up. The wolf and you are two separate beings.”

Remus looked up at that, his eyes as dark as chocolate. “No…no they’re not.” He breathed and took a shuddery breath. “We’re the same.”

XXX

Sirius gazed up at the moon, two days from its full. He sat in the window seat in their dorm and felt ice cold terror clutch at his heart, he couldn’t even begin to imagine the kind of agony he would be put through when that glowing silver orb waxed fully. He breathed in a lungful of smoke from the cigarette in his shaking hand, his bones ached and his skin crawled, he wasn’t sure if he had ever felt so terrible before. His eyes had dark circles surrounding them as he couldn’t sleep, night time had always held terror for him, it was at night when he would feel his father’s hands on his body. It was at night when he would wake in a cold sweat stifling his screams in a pillow. At night Sirius was vulnerable to his own dark memories but now it was worse than it ever had been, he now dreamt of bloody flesh, he dreamt of tearing, rending and he woke full of a rage that didn’t belong to him. He sighed and rested his forehead against the cold glass, ice clung to the outside in a network of microscopic strands and Sirius could see every detail of the pattern with eyes that used to be clouded by his own humanity. He sighed again, his breath fogging the glass and blurring the moon. He shifted uncomfortably as the dorm door opened to reveal Remus, he turned his head and saw him highlighted by a warm orange glow that came in from the stair case. Slowly he gazed into Remus’ eyes, he looked exactly how he felt and a new feeling rose within him; kinship. He now shared a bond with Remus that went beyond anything he had ever experienced, it was a magical bond that could never be shattered and he took comfort in the knowledge that at least someone in the world recognised him, that someone finally knew exactly who he was and didn’t judge him for it. “Remus…” He whispered and his friend walked to him, his feet making a soft sound as they trod over the crimson rug.

“I know.” Remus whispered as he reached Sirius’ side, he climbed into the window seat at his side and pulled him into an embrace. “I know…”

Sirius nodded into his chest and took a shaky breath. “I can feel it.”

“It’s…terrifying…isn’t it?”

Slowly Sirius lifted his head, his eyes clouded with fear and grief. “Yeah…yeah it is. I never even imagined…I didn’t understand…I’m sorry.”

Remus smiled bitterly and held him close again. “I never wanted you to understand.” He breathed and closed his eyes, his head rested atop Sirius’ and as he felt their hearts beat against one another he felt a warmth spread though him. A warmth that seemed to ease his own fear, it settled into his chest and stomach and he suddenly realised that for once this emotion did not belong to the wolf. He smiled softly and ran his fingers through Sirius’ long hair. “We’ll be alright, Siri. I’ve been doing this for years, it’s old hat.”

Sirius let out a guffaw of laughter. “Yeah, we’re in this together.” He reached up and wrapped his fingers in Remus’, he spent a while gazing at their clasped hands. How his skin looked so white in comparison to his friends, how the old scars on Remus’ fingers were almost silvery in the glow of the moon. He tightened his grip, suddenly too afraid to let go. He remembered how James had held him at night when he was shuddering from the after effects of a nightmare, how his soft voice rumbled in his chest as he spoke about silly, inconsequential things to ease Sirius’ racing heart. He smiled to himself and buried his face in Remus’ robes, his scent flooded him with endorphins and the part of his brain that was pure animal whispered; Mate. “Remus?”

“Mm?” Remus hummed, closing his eyes and enjoying the nearness of his best friend, his other half.

“When James and I were researching Lycanthropy to try and understand more about it we came across something…something that said many Werewolves never survive their first transformations…”

“You will!” Remus said sharply, he lifted Sirius’ head so they were looking into each other’s eyes. “I’ll make sure of it! I promise you, you’ll survive!”

Sirius smiled, the expression one only his closest friends ever got to witness and the effect on Remus was unexpected yet undeniable. His heart hammered in his chest so violently he feared they could hear it several floors down, his hands suddenly began to sweat slightly and he found himself unable to look away from Sirius’ eyes. “Thanks but really, the thought of my death has never bothered me.” Sirius said softly. “I was curious about whether it was true or not.”

“Sirius…” Remus breathed, he hated it when Sirius spoke so little of himself. He suddenly drew Sirius’ face closer, his fingers sliding into that soft hair and gripping it tightly. Their lips brushed lightly and Sirius closed his eyes. “You’re worth so, so much more than you think you are.” Remus kissed his friend lightly, their lips barely brushing yet the contact started a fire within him. Something that had begun as a tiny flame, a flame that was little more than platonic friendship was slowly becoming more. It began to burn brighter, to fill him with a previously unknown emotion…he didn’t know what it was but he liked it. Sirius made a noise that sounded like a purr as Remus deepened the kiss, their tongues met and tangled in a dance as old as time its self.

Sirius pressed his body closer, unable to deny the overwhelming desire that seared his veins. He wrapped his arms around Remus’ neck and held himself there, he kissed back with his head to the side and let his mind go blissfully blank. It occurred to him later that it was in that moment, with Remus’ unfamiliar tongue in his mouth, that he had felt the loneliness that had plagued him all his life seep away. The first time he had ever felt whole and desired…except for when he had shared his first kiss with James, but that was far from his mind.

Remus pushed his free hand into Sirius’ shirt and held it above his beating heart, each thud as strong as a drum beat and he smiled into the kiss. They were alive. They were both alive and he wasn’t alone. He heard Sirius whisper his name against his mouth and could no longer help himself, he ran his palm across the skin of Sirius’ chest and felt him shiver in delight. Sirius’ eyes burned with passion in the darkness of the dorm and he took hold of Remus’ hand and squeezed it. “Let’s start again.” He whispered, his eyes heavily lidded. “Let’s face it, Remus, you have no idea what you’re doing…” His smirk was playfully teasing and when Remus opened his mouth to protest he leaned in and ran a tongue across his bottom lip, nipping it lightly before drawing away again. “Let me teach you how to fuck me properly.” He said and stood up, still holding Remus’ hand he pulled him to his bed and lay down. Remus hovered over him looking nervous. This wasn’t like the times before, he didn’t have the comfort of allowing his animalistic instinct take over, Sirius meant to teach him how to make love to a guy properly.

“I-I…I’m not even gay…” Remus sighed and hung his head dejectedly.

“But apparently Moony is.” Sirius said with a smirk. “Either that or he thought I was a girl.”

“No…how can anyone think that, you walk around the dorm in the buff all the time.”

Sirius smiled. “I just know I’m fucking gorgeous.” He said and reached up, pulling Remus down on top of him.

“…you are…aren’t you?” Remus breathed, gazing at Sirius as if a veil had been torn from his eyes. Before he had bitten his friend he knew he was handsome, he understood that girls and even some guys lusted after the ‘pureblood prince’ but he had never seen him in the same way as everyone else. And now, now as he gazed into eyes the colour of the moon he realised how blind he had been. He could see why James spent whole minutes simply staring at him, he understood why girls sighed when he passed them in corridors and he understood now why Sirius was an insufferable arrogant git. Straight black hair fell shaggily into eyes as silver as knives, his cheek bones were beautifully defined and his lips were soft and pink, his skin a flawless white that almost seemed to glow. But it wasn’t just his physical appearance, Sirius, like James, had an inner glow that made him radiant. Admittedly Sirius’ glow was more like the stars in the night sky, whereas James was the sun. But it was still something addictive, it consumed Remus until before he could even think about his actions he was giving in to the desperate cry of the wolf as it raged inside his chest. He kissed Sirius’ lips hard, his tongue invading that hot mouth of its own accord. He felt Sirius’ hands in his hair and the heat of his body through their clothes.

They struggled with each other’s clothes, desperate to have them off but reluctant to stop their frantic kissing. Sirius gasped as he pulled away to pull his shirt off, he gave up after getting his arms tangled and began attacking Remus’ belt. Once Remus was trouser-less he pulled down his own and threw them onto the floor carelessly, he let Remus gaze down at his body, he let him run his hands over his chest and hips a while before taking them in his own and kissing Remus briefly. “Now then…To avoid hurting me or damaging something you’ve got to prepare me properly.”

“I know that I…”

Sirius smiled, cutting off Remus’ protests with a soft kiss. He took Remus’ right hand and put his two forefingers in his mouth. He watched Remus’ mouth fall open slightly as he ran his tongue over them, coating them in saliva before removing them again. He lifted his hips up slightly and guided Remus’ hand between his legs. “Be gentle this time…I like pain but even I have limits…”

Remus swallowed nervously, this was a little too much like losing his virginity and it confused him. Slowly, trying to spare Sirius as much pain as possible, he breached Sirius’ body. He watched as Sirius’ eyes drifted half-closed and his lips parted slightly. Remus devoured the sight hungrily, eyes moving over his face and recording every reaction as Sirius nudged him with his knee. “T-The other…” He whispered and Remus added the second finger. “Oh yeah…” Sirius’ head fell back and he lifted up his hips to give Remus easier access. “…Merlin…” Sirius breathed, his eyes falling closed and his hips moving slowly, he ran a hand down his chest and wrapped fingers around his neglected erection. Remus watched in fascination as Sirius’ hand moved up and down, squeezing every so often and his moans became steadily louder. Finally he released himself and pulled Remus down on top of him. “I’m ready…” He gasped. “Hurry…”

Remus nodded as Sirius lifted his legs, circling Remus’ waist and dragging his hips closer. Sirius tipped his head back, revealing the pale column of his throat as Remus began to enter him. He groaned heavily, his body thrumming with the flames of passion as Remus pushed himself as far as he would go. “Oh shit…” Remus gasped, falling forward onto his hands so he hovered above his mate and looked into eyes of clouded silver. “I-Is it…?” He whispered and in answer Sirius kissed him, one hand fisted tightly in his hair. Sirius body trembled violently with need.

“Move. Remus…”

The sound of his name slipping from Sirius’ lips made his hips jerk backwards on instinct, he slid out of that tight heat and pushed himself back in again. The pleasure was familiar but it was also different, he was himself while doing it and that seemed to make this moment something momentous. He shifted himself so he hooked one arm behind Sirius’ knee and slipped in deeper. To his pleasant surprise Sirius arched off the bed and gasped his name, a soft whine escaping him.

“A-Again…Remus…It’s good…” Sirius’ eyes closed briefly before opening again as Remus began to speed up his thrusts, they were still slow and steady but they sent jolts of pure pleasure right into his spine. Heat pooled into his abdomen and he gripped the sheets so tightly his knuckles went white, again his back arched as he sought contact with his lover. “Oh fuck!” He cried loudly, his body was on fire. He panted heavily and suddenly dragged Remus down to kiss him, their tongues tangled between their lips and they swallowed each other’s moans of desperate pleasure. “Fuck me, Remus.” Sirius whispered, and Remus obliged, his own moans softer and quieter but no less passionate. They sank themselves into sensation, there was no one else in the universe as their eyes met.

Remus reached between their sweating bodies and took hold of Sirius’ erection, he began moving his hand and was satisfied to feel him buck desperately. Hair tangled around his face as he moaned. “S-Sirius…” Remus whispered and began speeding up his movements as his body was pushed towards orgasm, “Fuck! Fuck shit!” He hissed, not usually one to swear so much but unable to form any other words. He felt Sirius tense beneath him, his body reacting to the stimulation on his cock.

“Remus…more…harder…f-fuck me h-harder…”

Remus bent down and kissed Sirius’ throat, his teeth leaving visible marks that neither of them cared about. He marked Sirius with his teeth in wolf form and now he wanted to mark him in human form, he didn’t know why or what the significance was only that his instincts were driving him on. Sirius gasped suddenly, his body tensing as he lifted his hips up and pushed back against Remus’ intrusion. The sharp stinging pain of Remus’ teeth sent a white hot knife into his groin, the tightening coil in his gut twisted violently and he came hard. “FUCK!” His voice cracked as he threw his head back, the bed shuddered beneath them.

As Sirius’ body tightened around him Remus felt his own orgasm hit him so suddenly he saw white, his body stiffened as he hissed Sirius’ name against the hollow of his throat before collapsing helplessly.

Sirius lay still, his eyes closed as he enjoyed the hot breath caressing his burning skin. Slowly he ran his fingers delicately up Remus’ scarred back and felt him shiver. “You’re learning, Moony.” Sirius whispered, his voice hoarse.

Remus chuckled weakly and lifted himself up onto his elbows so he could look into those fantastic moonlight eyes. “I have the best teacher.” He breathed and pressed his lips to Sirius’. They kissed for a while, slow and languid kisses with their hands tangled in each other’s hair.

“I could get used to this, Padfoot.” Remus whispered, he could feel himself teetering on the edge of sleep, Sirius curled firmly at his side.

Sirius said nothing, he opened his eyes and stared out at the dark, empty dorm. Absently he played with a chunk of Remus’ hair as he felt his lovers breathing even out. “You shouldn’t.” He whispered softly. “You shouldn’t fall for me, Remus…” He closed his eyes and sighed, turning his head to the side as he felt a chill run down his spine. Love would over complicate everything, Sirius loved James and nothing could ever change that, not even if Moony had claimed him as his mate, not even if the stars died and the sun fell out of the sky…he belonged to James Potter and he would up until the day he died.

XXX

The shack creaked around them as Madam Pomfrey ushered them into the room from the secret passage way beneath the Willow. Sirius gazed around the familiar space and felt sick, he fell onto the bed and doubled over with his hands shoved into his hair.

“The Headmaster has warned Mr. Potter and Mr. Pettigrew to stay well away from you tonight and all other full moons. It’s for their own safety.” Poppy’s eyes softened as she gazed at the two of them. “You’ll be alright. I will come to collect you in the morning then…” She left the way she had come and silence fell.

The creaking shack was loud in Sirius’ ears, it seemed as if his senses had heightened painfully and he was hearing things he wouldn’t have normally have heard as a human. His eyesight was so enhanced that he could see the intricate play of the veins in the leaves on trees from a good meter away, his sense of smell was also painfully strong. Certain odours made him want to throw up, especially citrus smells. Others, like James’ scent, made him feel as if he was being torn apart inside. He sighed as Remus sat at his side, they both were reluctant to touch each other, almost as if they feared they would break. “It’s going to be alright, Sirius.” Remus said in a soft, gentle voice.

Sirius let his hands fall from his face as he turned to his mate. “Is it? Is it really?” He breathed, the desperation must have been clear because Remus looked at him with large sad eyes.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered.

Sirius shook his head. “I didn’t mean that…” He looked at the palms of his hands for a minute, he could see every whorl in his finger prints and it hypnotised him for a second before he felt Remus grab his hand in his own tightly. They didn’t look at each other as they stripped off their clothes and placed them neatly aside, they sat back down and clasped hands so tightly their nails dug into each other’s skin. And they waited…

Slowly the moon rose outside, Sirius could actually feel it. It was like someone was pulling on his flesh, it was as if he had been turned to liquid and was being yanked around by the tidal effects of the moon. He shuddered and felt Remus’ grip tighten on his own. “Don’t let go.” He said in a voice so childish he would have hated himself if he hadn’t been so frightened. “Please…don’t ever let go.”

“I won’t.” Remus replied, his voice much steadier than his own. He had his head up and was gazing at the only window in the room, silver light was slowly reaching towards them and he felt his skin bubble.

“Ugh…” Sirius jerked forward with a strangled sound, yet Remus didn’t let go of his hand even as he felt agony of his own tear through him. “Hnnng…R-Re…Remus…H-Hurts…”

“I know…” Remus gasped in response, he closed his eyes tightly and felt the horrifically familiar feeling of his bones beginning to snap. Sirius screamed. Remus bit back his own, he had to be stronger. He had to get Sirius through it in one piece. He grunted and fell forward onto his free hand, Sirius’ own was moving oddly against his, almost as if every muscle in his hand were melting and bubbling beneath the skin. He forced away the urge to withdraw and held on tighter as his nerves began to burn, his body flushed in heat and he arched his back. The nails of his free hand gouged long marks into the wooden floor and he felt Sirius’ nails leaving long, bloody lines across the back of his hand. More scars. Not that he was worried, he had plenty already but Sirius…Sirius’ skin was virtually flawless. Remus felt grief tinge the agony in his body, his flesh tightening, his bones creaking, breaking and reforming into unnatural shapes. Finally he could hold it in no longer, he screamed…

Sirius’ scream joined Remus’ as their fingers were finally wrenched from each other with the sheer force of their transformations. Sirius could feel his body changing, a burning, bubbling sensation that was horrible and made him want to scratch at himself but he couldn’t because now his hands were elongating into forepaws. This was nothing like the smooth, liquid transformation of an animagus. Sirius remembered easily switching from human to Padfoot, he remembered how wonderful it was to feel his flesh moving, his bones turning to liquid as they changed and reformed. It was a pleasant feeling…not like this. This was as if he had been dropped into scolding lava. He was being shattered upon sharp, jagged rocks and he felt every bone in his body breaking under the strain. He raked helplessly at the floor, his back arching as he screamed in agony.

Their screams turned to howls, a long drawn out sound that was full of their pain and anguish as the wolves broke free of their human bodies.

James crouched in the passage way into the Shack, he could hear Peter’s terrified breathing at his back but ignored it. He could see something he had never even read about before in books, it hurt him to see it but a part of him was happy.

There were two wolves in the shack, one was a large grey one with a slightly ragged appearance and a white patch on his nose. His eyes were dark amber and seemed to glow in the moonlight, this one James was familiar with, as familiar as he was with Prongs. The other…the other was a beautiful specimen. He was as black as coal, his coat shiny with no visible markings. His eyes were silver, as silver as the full moon hanging above their heads. James smiled slightly, he was normally worried about Remus during the transition but now he realised he didn’t have to worry.

The two wolves were curled up side by side, the large grey had one paw resting upon the head of the black who had half-closed eyes and an expression of peace on his face as he rested his massive head on his forepaws. Moony lifted his own head and gazed directly at James, he blinked once and James froze. The Black yawned and shook the paw off his head as he rose to his feet, he was limping a little but seemed in far better condition than James had seen Remus in so soon after a change. James prepared to transform in the passageway but he had no need to. Moony’s head lowered as if he was granting him permission to stay while the Black wolf prowled around the room, sniffing at things curiously as his ears twitched. Then he seemed to spot movement, he spun around with a soft huffing noise, his ear standing straight upwards. Moony twitched an ear at him and his lips peeled back from his teeth, it was almost a smile.

XXX

Sirius’ eyes flickered open slowly, he was assaulted by light so he closed them again rapidly. He rolled over only to feel hard wood beneath his bruised body, a heavy arm had been thrown across his body. His stomach clenched painfully and he found himself doubled over in pain, he lay, curled on his side as agony assaulted every fibre of his being. Unwittingly he let out a choked sob and felt his night time partner stir, Remus yawned and saw Sirius in obvious pain. He knew that pain, vaguely from memories of the first few times he had changed. Slowly he pushed himself up onto his elbow and began smoothing Sirius’ hair gently, just as his mother had done for him on mornings such as these. “It gets easier, Sirius.” He whispered into his friend’s ear and felt a shudder wrack his frame. “I promise…”

Sirius opened his eyes slightly, they watered in pain and he gritted his teeth. “K-Kill me…” He gasped desperately, his hands going to his hair as he curled in on himself. “I-I can’t…l-live…like…this…”

Remus gazed at him, completely unsurprised. It wasn’t unexpected but it still hurt to hear it, he continued the stroking of Sirius’ hair. “Trust me, you don’t want that…you can live with it, you’re strong, Sirius. If I can love with it, so can you.”

Sirius turned to him, his eyes swimming with tears of pain. “No…I can’t…don’t m-make me…Please…”

Remus couldn’t speak so he leaned down and kissed Sirius, their lips moulded together as easily as if they had been meant for each other. He felt Sirius relax a little and drew away enough so their noses were touching. “I won’t let you harm yourself.” He said and smiled. “You helped me, even when you knew the risks, now it’s my turn to repay that favour in my own way…” He smoothed Sirius’ fringe back from his eyes. “I swear to you, Siri…Padfoot, that we’ll get through this together.”

“W-Why?” Sirius croaked, a small frown marring his forehead. “Why would you do that for me?”

Remus cocked his head to the side. “The same reason you spent five years working out how to become Animagi for me.”

Sirius blinked sleepily at him, the golden rays of the sun catching in his hair as it was splayed around the dusty floor. Remus didn’t think he had ever seen anything so breathtaking. “Because we’re friends…” He said slowly.

Remus kissed him, their tongues meeting each other and he held back what was on the very tip of his tongue; No, we’re more than that now…
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Someone Like You, Someone Like Me...