Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

"Why Me?"	By : SpeedyTomato Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male Views: 88152 -:- Recommendations : 4 -:- Currently Reading : 8
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and make no money off this work of extreme insanity.

Chapter List
- 2
- 3
- 4
Beta'd by the amazing Tenchi. Love you, woman, you're the best!

For update notices for this, or any of my works, you can follow me on Twitter or FaceBook, both links are on my profile. Or send an email to SpeedyTomato_updates@Live.com. Just mention the name of the story you want the notice on or you can request to be updated for all of them. Thanks to Rogue for running that for me!

Chapter 3:

And just when you thought it couldn't get any worse—it does!

Landing in Dumbledore's office, the only thing that kept Harry from falling on his already sore arse was Sirius grabbing hold of him. Straightening up, he flushed slightly, fighting the urge to groan when he saw Professor McGonagall walk in. Shutting his eyes, he rubbed them, shaking his head. Like Lucius said; humiliation.

Looking at the group there, Minerva clasped her hands in front of her, wondering what in Merlin's name was going on! Eyes lingering on Lucius, she then looked at Sirius and asked, “What happened? All Albus said was to keep the three of you here until he can make it back.”

Sighing, rubbing his eyes, Sirius nodded, assuming Albus had something, somewhere cooking already. Quietly, he asked, “The others?”

“The other students are back,” she nodded, looking slightly relieved. Glancing at Harry, who was looking at the floor, flushed, she added, “Albus said to tell them Harry is fine, but not to let them see him. Also, he wants his school trunk packed and brought here. What's going on!”

Rubbing his forehead, his temper, something that had taken a backseat to the strangeness that had taken place, was rising quickly, so Harry hissed through clenched teeth, “Where is Umbridge?” Though his voice was soft, there was a serious bite to the tone.

“We don't know,” Minerva admitted softly, eyes widening slightly. She knew Harry well by this point and that he had a temper, but tried to keep it in check. The look on his face though—he looked murderous. Keeping her tone soft, she said, “We were hoping one of you knew where she went. Right after all of you vanished, she did as well. Why?”

“Because I'm going to have you teach me how to transfigure her into a big pink toad that I'm going to feed to one of Hagrid's pets!” Harry shouted. “If I can't learn it quickly, I'm willing to pay you to do it for me! Whatever it takes! I don't care! Just—oh, I'm hexing her within an inch of her bloody life the next time I see her! I don't care how much time in lands me in Azkaban! It would probably be called justifiable jinxing with what she just caused and they would let me off with a pat on the head!” Stopping, chest heaving, eyes almost glowing from the anger, he gritted his teeth, breathing heavily. Seeing an almost stunned look on McGonagall's face, he glared at Malfoy then asked, teeth clenched so tightly that his jaw was starting to ache, he asked, “Can't I sue her for every loathsome pink article in her wardrobe or something like that for being the cause of this?”

Snorting, amused, Lucius actually liked that idea. “I'll look into it. It's possible! I'll add the imbecile that left that spell active on the room to the list and anyone else involved in this debacle.”

“Spell? Room?” Minerva asked, lost, looking at Sirius for an explanation.

Pulling Harry close, giving him a one-armed hug and holding him there, Sirius sighed, shaking his head. “We ran into a slight issue in the room that deals with bonds.” Stopping, looking dour then glancing at Lucius, he huffed before saying, “I think we could all probably do with something calming right now.” Emotions were already high, something that would warrant such a draught, but he was certain all of them were going to need it to deal with Albus. The old man had already looked far too amused by this for his comfort. That never boded well for anyone.

“And something for pain,” Harry muttered, eyes locked on the floor. Looking dour, he added, softly, “I would like to be able to sit down at some point.”

Eyes widening more, Minerva looked at Harry then to the other two as the gears slowly moved, making some things click into place. Shaking her head, she said, “no,” softly while she glanced between the three of them.

“Yes,” Sirius told her with a sigh, looking at the floor as well.

“Was sex involved?” Minerva asked quietly, trying to keep her tone soft.

“Yes! It was involved!” Harry shouted, flushing bright red. “Why does everyone need to ask that?” Turning his back to everyone, he just rubbed his eyes, groaning. Right now, he just wanted the castle to swallow him up so he didn't have to face that question again!

Flushing slightly herself, eyes wide, Minerva looked between the two that were still facing her, both of whom were looking anywhere but in her direction, then said, “Oh,” quietly. “Um—yes, I'll get something calming and for pain. Let me send for Severus. That way we don't have to involve Poppy in this.” Clearing her throat, she turned and walked out to send a message to Severus. This was—oh, this wasn't good!

“Great! Just who I want involved,” Harry muttered, staring at the floor, crossing his arms over his chest.

After a wary look at Lucius, who was glaring murderously at all the paintings gossiping, Sirius walked over to the one of Phineas then gave him a message to pass along to Remus. When that was done, he walked over and put an arm around Harry's shoulders. Giving him a squeeze, he said, “Well, on the bright side, you never have to go to the Durlsey's again! And you get to stay with me!”

“There is that,” Harry told him, grinning just a little. Sighing, he shook his head then moaned, “I liked girls, I really did! They're nice to look at it and smell good. There are those curves too. Now, well—yeah. I guess I never get to find out about other parts I was interested in exploring, do I?”

Rubbing his eyes, Sirius didn't know what to say to that.

Snorting, Lucius rolled his eyes. “They are overrated. Males are much better to deal with. Females—they are overly emotional, irrational, prone to bouts of insanity which becomes worse for about one week a month, unable to be deciphered and all around bad to deal with. You aren't missing anything.” He said dryly, shaking his head.

“Pardon me if I would have liked to figure that out for myself,” Harry snarled, glaring at him.

Huffing, Lucius was about to say something else when Minerva returned with an all too amused looking Severus. Glowering at the man in black, teeth grinding, he waited, hand on his cane, for one wrong word. This, he was certain, would give him a way to assuage his temper.

Looking at the three there, Severus couldn't help but smirk. If what he was thinking took place was correct, this was too funny! “Well, Mr. Potter, it appears you have gotten yourself into yet another mess, doesn't it?” He asked smoothly, trying to keep the amusement out of his tone.

Head coming up, Harry glared at the man, teeth clenching once more. He was about to say something when he was stopped by Sirius and Lucius, both, leveling their wands at the man.

“Excuse me, Severus?” Lucius drawled, tone smooth but with a bite to it that would send shivers down the spine of any sane person. “I think you should repeat that so I can point out your errors in logic!”

“Go on, say it again!” Sirius challenged, dark eyes narrowed at his old nemesis. “I dare you,” he hissed softly.

Faced with the wands of both adult and obviously upset wizards, Severus looked between the two, mouth puckered to the point it looked as though he had swallowed a whole tree full of lemons. One he could take, but both Black and Lucius? No chance in hell. He would be unrecognizable when they were done with him!

Glowering at the hated Potions Master, Harry was about to say something when he remembered the comment about being 'snuggled' by Nagini. Unable to stop himself, he grinned from ear to ear, eyes taking on an almost maniacal light. Snickering, he said, softly, making sure that Professor McGonagall couldn't hear, “Don't bother, he has worse waiting for him tonight.” Stopping there, he turned his back to Snape but began to sing several stanzas of Elvis Presley's song Teddy Bear softly.

Catching on to what Harry meant, Sirius began to chuckle, grinning from ear to ear as he looked at Snape. “There is that,” he added smugly.

“Indeed,” Lucius added, also looking smug, a smirk on his face.

Starting to look thunderous, Snape hissed, “Explain that.”

Shaking her head, Minerva pinched the bridge of her nose. Leave it to Severus to make the situation worse! Sighing, she said something about retrieving Harry's trunk and walked out, hoping whatever spells were thrown could be countered when she got back, not to mention Albus' office was still in one piece. However, she didn't want to see it either or get caught in the middle of whatever was going to happen.

Watching the aging Transfiguration professor walk out, Lucius said, cryptically, making sure his voice was kept soft so the paintings couldn't pick up on it, “Harry got to meet a good friend of ours and his companion. She took a shine to him. Well, you know what she's like when that happens. Bribery was offered in the form of you to get her to release him. Yes, Severus, you have a job as a teddy bear tonight.”

Leveling the worst glare he had in his arsenal at Lucius, Severus hissed, “You're lying!”

“He's not,” Sirius grinned then cackled. Schooling his voice into a caricature of Voldemort's, he said, “Leave poor Harry alone, you naughty girl. If you leave him alone, I'll let you snuggle on Severus tonight. You know you like the huffy, grumpy noises he makes when you do that.” Stopping, he just continued to grin at Snape.

His look going beyond thunderous into downright murderous, Snape glared at Black then to the obviously sadistically amused Lucius. Hissing, he said, “Someone will pay for this!”

“Yes, you,” Lucius told him smoothly, smirk growing. “And I would suggest that unless you want to make it worse on yourself, you will keep your snark to yourself and leave Harry alone. Do you understand, Severus?” Lucius drawled. As Snape was well aware, he had ways of contacting the Dark Lord that no one else did, something that could get Severus into more hot water, thus a longer snuggling session with tickles thrown in for good measure. Maybe even a makeover in colors the Dark Lord thought would look good on him with spells that couldn't be reversed and would have to fade out over a couple days time. On the heels of that he gave an internal sigh that he was defending Potter. It was the bond, he knew that, but it didn't mean he liked it! He supposed it was bound to happen and was now starting to manifest. It would just get worse from here on out.

“Understood,” Severus ground out, shooting Malfoy the blackest look he could muster. Thrusting the calming draughts, one for pain and some cream at Black, he said, “I'm sure one of you knows the spell for the cream.”

Taking them, Sirius downed his own calming draught then handed one to Malfoy. Turning, he stood by Harry and gave him not only that but the potion for pain. Quietly, he said, “Just hold still and I'll put the cream on. It'll sting for a minute, but you'll then feel better.”

Nodding, Harry downed the foul tasting potions then winced as Sirius used the spell to apply the cream. His arsehole felt like it was on fire for a second then there was something soothing that took all the pain away, something that made him sigh in relief.

Conjuring a couple big, squishy comfortable chairs for them, Sirius guided Harry over so they could both take a seat.

Flopping in his chair, Harry rubbed his eyes then asked Sirius, quietly, “Can't we just go or something? I don't think I can face any twinkling from Dumbledore.”

Just as Sirius was about to concede that and plot to get out of there, the man in question walked in. Glowering in his direction as Albus still looked far too happy about the situation, he just put a hand on Harry's back and rubbed it, waiting.

After conjuring Lucius one of his normal chintz covered chairs, Albus sat down behind the desk and looked at the three, eyes twinkling merrily. “Well, I did some checking and found the spells on the room you were in. It seemed that the assistant that was working in there forgot to deactivate them before going home. The head of that section will be checking into what reversal there is for them, if there is one, and I'll do the same. For now, though, there is nothing that can be done. You'll have to remain together.” Glancing towards Lucius, he twinkled harder, chuckling, “I think Grimmauld Place is good for you to stay in. After all, you will all be safe there. If it's as it was explained to me, and the description you gave, none of you can betray each other.” Stopping, he then stroked his beard while looking at Lucius before hinting, “Of course, I can assist in ensuring your family is safe, Lucius. If you would just give us some information, I'm certain we can work from there. After all, this is for a good cause, you have to admit that.”

Glowering at the headmaster, knowing that had to come at some point, he said, tone icy, “No. My family will be perfectly safe. I cannot betray Black and Potter to anyone, but nothing, nowhere, says I have to help you. Nor will I. Don't bother to ask.”

Looking at Albus, Sirius gave an internal sigh. Oh yes, Albus was going to try to use this mess to his advantage and wanted Lucius at Grimmauld Place to persuade him to give up information. If it came down to it, the old goat would use him and Harry as leverage to do it as well. That didn't set right with him.

Twinkling harder, figuring that was coming, Albus gave a sigh then said, “Just think it over, Lucius.” Looking at Sirius and Harry, he said, “Before I came back, I checked. The bond is already registered. The Ministry, of course, won't look for you with it as bonds aren't announced and I made certain a spell was on it to hide your name. That should be all the protection you need. It also means that Harry here is considered a legal adult and the Trace is gone. So, he can do magic outside of school.”

That part made Harry brighten up a little and grin. At least some good came of this nightmare! It also meant that he could learn the spells he needed to transform Umbridge into a toad and turn her a nice shade of pink. Vaguely, he wondered if Buckbeak would eat a toad and if someone as foul as Umbridge would give the poor hippogriff indigestion. He would have to look into that.

“We do, however, need to worry about his schooling.” Albus said, looking around. “You and Remus can handle that I think. Well, most of it. I'll do the forms for the homeschooling and send them off.” Glancing at Lucius, he said, “I believe Lucius can help as well.”

“I will,” Lucius said with a nod. Of all the things so far, this was the easiest and one he took no issue with. After all, with the year Harry was in, it wouldn't be an issue and he could easily handle the topics.

Actually, Harry had no problem with that. In fact, other than he wouldn't get to see his friends much, he liked the idea. It would get him out of the castle and away from so much of the crap. Listening in, he didn't say much until they got to the part about Lucius helping. Muttering softly, so that only Sirius and Lucius could hear him, he said, “He's not teaching me Herbology. If he likes to molest plants, I'll just end up more traumatized than I already am. No, I don't want to see that! I can't even imagine how you would molest a plant and don't want an education in how to do it!”

All along, Sirius had an inkling Harry was rather naive about many things sexual. Even others had mentioned to him that he didn't 'get' some things, something they had come to him about and suggested that he talk with Harry so that he wasn't left in the dark with so much then could get into trouble over it. Now, well, he was hit with it, hard. That one comment by Voldemort, something he knew was metaphoric, Harry apparently didn't get and thought was real. And, honestly? That was all it took for him. Grinning from ear to ear, trying not to laugh, he leaned over and muttered, “Harry, I'll explain that part later. It's not how it sounds, alright?” However, when he looked up and saw the look on Lucius' face, something disgruntled, he was done for. Holding his sides, he started to laugh, unable to stop it.

Looking down, pinching the bridge of his nose, Lucius muttered under his breath about how he was going to get even with a certain Dark Lord for some of the comments that were made. Right now, he didn't need this! The day was bad enough as it was, he didn't need the young man sitting next to him thinking he actually molested plant life and was worried about seeing something traumatic if he taught him Herbology! No! That was wrong on many levels!

Amused by Sirius' laughter, though not understanding what brought it on, Albus cleared his throat then said, “Well, there won't be much more to teach this year, obviously, but--” That's where he was cut off by a very familiar eagle owl swooping in the window and landing on the desk right in front of Lucius. Seeing the red letter attached to the bird, he looked even more amused than before. “Lucius, it appears that Narcissa has found out something is amiss!”

Looking at his favorite owl, Zeus, Lucius felt his stomach sink. A Howler he knew how to handle. Like most, he just vanished the dratted things and didn't open them. However, his wife had made it to where he couldn't do that. The black seal on it had a spell that made you open them and ensured that they couldn't be vanished. Oh, this was bad. Glowering at poor Zeus, who seemed to be giving him a pitying look, he took the thing and opened it then waited, grinding his teeth.

“Lucius Abraxas Malfoy! What have you done?” Narcissa's voice shrieked, making him shrink back. Narcissa, ever the evil female, had learned to not only magnify her voice for Howlers, but increase the pitch of it to the point that it make him cringe, acting like nails down a chalkboard to his nervous system. “I got divorce papers, Lucius. Divorce papers! There was no warning either! You didn't even tell me you were unhappy! No, all you did was divorce me! How could you, Lucius? We were together for so long and now I'm tossed aside like trash! No warning, no indication you were unhappy, nothing! Just divorce papers. I deserve better than this, Lucius! I am a Black, don't forget that! Revenge will be had, Lucius! Whomever that little tart you hooked up with is, they are going to pay! I will make sure of it! From what I have been able to find, you're at Hogwarts. Keep yourself right there, Lucius, because I'm coming! I'm going to get our son then you're going to explain to us both why you left me! If you leave, Lucius, I will track you down!” With that, the letter then caught fire and burned to a crisp.

Looking down at the floor, shaking his head, Lucius pinched the bridge of his nose. Oh, Narcissa was loving being a drama queen too much for his comfort! Now, well—who was he kidding? She was going to go full out psycho drama queen on him in front of others! No, she didn't need to do that because she would enjoy it too much.

“Wow,” was all Harry said, looking at where the Howler had been. Looking at Sirius, who had his head down, but his shoulders were shaking, indicating he was laughing, Harry just shook his head and grinned then asked, “How's she going to feel when she learns it was her own son that frog-marched me and the others to Umbridge? She gonna shriek at him too?”

Head coming up, Lucius glared at him then hissed, “Tell me that Draco had nothing to do with this! My son could not have been involved!”

Grin growing, Harry looked pleased with himself then said, “He did. He and his two goons are the ones that rounded us up. You gonna sue him as well?”

Rubbing his now throbbing forehead, Lucius tried not to whimper. He managed, but it was threatening to escape. This was—each passing minute made the whole thing worse. Shaking his head, getting himself under some form of control, he sighed then looked at Dumbledore. “I wish to speak to Draco before she gets here.” Stopping, he glowered at the headmaster who looked completely amused by what he was seeing. Oh yes, at some point he was going to be throwing hexes at the old goat! That he was certain of!

“I think—yes, we can arrange that.” Looking at Severus, who was smirking in amusement, he told him, “If you would, please, Severus? Draco may want warning that this is coming.”

“Of course,” Severus said, looking all too sadistically pleased with the situation, then swept out to get the younger Malfoy.

Glowering at Severus' back as he left, Lucius then shot Dumbledore a murderous look. Huffing, he sat up straight then smoothed down his robes and called for his most trusted house elf. When Winken appeared, he directed the aged elf to pack all his things and move them to Grimmauld Place. When he got there, he would get with the elf as to where they went. With a vigorous nod, bat-like ears flapping, Winken popped out to attend to what was needed.

Watching, Harry looked at Sirius then shrugged, still grinning a bit. No, he was still not happy about any of this, that's for sure, but at least he was getting some kind of sadistic amusement out of the suffering of some! That was wrong, he knew it, but right now he was sure it was the only thing keeping him sane. Eyes on his godfather, he shrugged, grinning a little, not sure what to say.

“Your home better be suitable for habitation, Black,” was all Lucius ground out, glaring murderously at the floor, plotting revenge against many beings at this point.

Chuckling, Sirius said, “That depends on how many house elves you use to clean it.”

Pinching the bridge of his nose again, Lucius sighed. Oh, this was bad. Teeth clenched, he hissed out, “I want my own room. That you will arrange.”

“Fine,” Sirius said, grinning sadistically. “You can have mother's old room.” Nudging Harry, he winked.

Knowing Buckbeak was in there and that Lucius was the one that set him up for execution, Harry just chuckled. If what Hagrid said was right and hippogriffs had a long memory, this should be quite amusing!

Snorting in amusement, eyes twinkling harder, Albus said nothing, leaning back in his chair. This he could use! He really could! Lucius was a big fish to catch. It was just going to take him time to work with the man. In the end, he would see the light and work with them.

Pale, not sure what was going on, Draco followed Snape to Dumbledore's office. His head of house wouldn't tell him what was going on, just that his father was here and needed to talk to him. The evil smirk on Severus' face told him that he probably wouldn't like it though.

Sighing, as he rode the revolving staircase upwards, he looked at Snape but said nothing, more curious than ever. At the top, he followed the man into the office then stopped, eyes wide. Oh yes, his father was there, but so were Potter, Black and a very amused looking Dumbledore. By now he knew that an amused looking Dumbledore didn't bode well for anyone. Swallowing thickly, wondering if the whole squad thing was going to get him into trouble since Umbridge had apparently pulled something big, he looked at his father and asked, “Father? What's going on?”

Dour look on his face, Lucius looked at the floor then said, sighing softly, “Draco, we have an issue. Your mother is on her way here and I think you should know what's going on before she arrives.”

That look on his father's face was enough to tell him whatever was going on was bad. Whimpering softly, Draco grabbed a chair and dropped into it. “What happened?”

Unable to help himself, Harry, who grinned at Sirius said, “You know how you rounded us up for Umbridge? Well, she dropped us into the middle of something big and, well, I’m now bonded with your father and Sirius. I think, maybe, that makes me something like your step-father.” Stopping, he looked up at Draco, who was pale, shaking and appeared as though he was going to puke, then grinned bigger, “I don't think I'm going to make you call me dad though.”

“You're lying!” Draco shrieked. Somewhere, he realized that he sounded very girly when he did that, but couldn't help himself. “He's lying! Father! Do something!” Panting heavily, sure he was going to have a full on panic attack, Draco looked at his father, waiting. Oh, no, this was—NO! No! Oh, no way in hell!

Shooting Potter a glare for not helping the matter at all, Lucius sighed then said, tone level, “He's not lying, Draco. We've been bonded together. Your mother received the divorce papers it triggered, so it's legitimate. She's on her way here, as a matter of fact.” With what he knew his son was aware of when it came to what was truly going on, he figured Draco would get what he was going for.

Shaking his head, Draco whispered, “Oh bollocks!” Normally, he didn't use that kind of language as it was far beneath his social status, but if this meant what he thought it did, he would ponder going into hiding himself! His mother would be frightening to deal with as she went after everything male that was of legal age.

“She's already sent a Howler,” Lucius told his son, hoping to prepare him for what was coming.

“She's going to go bats,” Draco moaned, rocking in his chair.

“Oh, yes,” Lucius agreed grimly, looking down.

“Father,” Draco whinged. “Do something! Break the bond, un-divorce her, something! She's going to shriek, father! You can't let this happen!”

“I can't stop it,” Lucius told him, tone flat, sour look on his face.

Whining loudly, Draco looked around wildly. Potter, well, he tired to glare at him because the prat looked amused, but failed as panic took over. Black was laughing his arse off. Even Professor Snape was looking amused. This was bad. “Nooooooooooooooo,” he whinged, tugging at his hair. “Hide me! I can't deal with this. Potions, I need potions!”

Unable to help himself, enjoying seeing this too much, Severus mentioned casually, “Sex was involved, Draco, there is no undoing it.”

“Visions! You gave me visions!” Draco shrieked, standing up, looking around for an escape route while he pulled on his own hair, wanting to claw his brain out at the visions invoked by what was said. “No! I can't deal with this! Send me to the Weasley's, something! Anything! No! I can't be here when mother arrives!”

Huffing, glaring at Severus, and grinding his teeth, Lucius told his son, “Calm down, Draco!”

“I can't,” Draco shrilled, looking completely panicked. “She's going to--” flapping his hands, he stammered, unable to get anything out.

“I know,” Lucius told him, glaring at the floor as if it had personally wronged him. Normally, he was good at getting his son calmed down, but he wasn't even going to attempt it this time. With what was coming, panic was warranted. Shooting a glare at the amused, unhelpful Severus, he ground out, “Give him something, would you?”

Smirking, completely amused by the normally unflappable Draco losing it, Severus produced a bottle of a very powerful calming draught. Before he could hand it over, however, Draco snatched it out of his hand.

Fumbling with the stopper, Draco, hands shaking so badly he could barely hold onto the thing, managed to get it out then downed it all in one gulp. Looking around wildly, he hissed, “Hide me!” Just as the words exited his mouth, he heard the revolving stairs start up and his eyes went so wide they almost fell out of his head. Gibbering, he whimpered, “It's her.” Stiffening up, he began to inch, slowly, to a dark corner where he hoped to hide himself. His mother in full drama queen mode was a frightening thing to behold and he didn't want to experience it again if he could at all help it.

“Draco, you don't know--” Lucius started but was cut off by a familiar voice that had him not only stiffening up, but standing and looking for a hiding place for himself.

“Lucius Abraxas Malfoy! What have you done?” Narcissa shrieked as she stepped into the office.

Clutching his cane convulsively, mind no longer on his poor traumatized son who was cowering behind the unabashedly amused Severus, Lucius looked at his wife, well, former wife, and said, tone soothing, “It's not what you think, Narcissa.”

Wand leveled at Lucius, Narcissa screamed, “You divorced me! That's just how it seems, Lucius!”

“I had no choice!” Lucius ground out, glowering at her. It was all well and good to make this look like the real thing for everyone in the room, but she was looking to go overboard with it! No! She didn't need to take that much enjoyment out of his suffering!

“Who is she, Lucius? Who is the little tramp? You wouldn't just divorce me if there was no one else!” Narcissa snarled, clutching her wand as she did an internal happy dance. Already she was cataloging the men she was going to have to visit to let them know she was back on the market! This was wonderful!

“Not a she, a he. Two of them. Including one your son's age,” Severus offered helpfully, grinning evilly.

“What?” Narcissa shouted, eyes growing wide. “You left me for another man, Lucius? Do you know what that will do to my social standing!” As she already knew the situation and who was involved from Tom, she wasn't shocked. However, there were appearances to keep up. With a sadistic pleasure, she shot off a castration spell in her husband's direction, though ensured that she missed everyone, then let out an indignant howl and took after Lucius, shooting plenty of spells, though ensuring that she missed everyone as she did.

Ducking and dodging, making sure that Draco was firmly behind Severus, though it was apparent Narcissa was going to ensure no one was hit, Lucius glowered at her as he saw the orange colored spell he knew was one meant for the castration of animals. This was—NO! “Narcissa!” He hissed. “Calm down!”

“You left me for a man, Lucius!” Narcissa bellowed, shooting off a spell that was intended to tie the male anatomy in a knot.

“Your cousin no less,” Severus added helpfully, making certain there was a shield up around him and Draco. Black and Potter had headed for one of the corners and were behind their own. Dumbledore was just sitting at his desk, a shield around him, looking entirely amused.

Though this was not new information to her, Narcissa paused and made it look like she was noticing Sirius for the first time. Eyes widening as she saw Potter peering over his shoulder, she rounded on her husband then bellowed, “You left me for Sirius! And Potter! You sick pervert!” Shooting off a spell meant to make all the male gender defining bits crawl back up inside the body slowly and painfully, she took off after Lucius.

“Calming draught, Severus! The strongest you have,” Lucius snarled as he ducked the spell, making his way behind Dumbledore.

At this point, though he was certain it was all an act to further one of the Dark Lord's agendas, Severus couldn't help but wonder if it wasn't and produced another draught from his pocket. If nothing else, it would stop the spells that were being thrown. Though it did appear the dead on accurate Narcissa was intending to miss everyone, one never knew when a spell would go wayward and someone might get hurt. Tossing it to Lucius, he made certain that Draco was still behind him and waited, completely amused by this.

Catching it, making certain to stay behind Dumbledore, Lucius held it out to his wife, “Take it, Narcissa, then we'll talk. There is much to be worked out. Draco is involved in this.”

Pretending that her son's name woke her out of her fit, Narcissa looked around for him. Spying him safely cowering behind Severus, she gave an internal nod. It was time for the show to end and for them to press on. Shooting Lucius another glare, she walked over and snatched the calming draught out of his hand then downed it. Glowering at him, she hissed, “We need to talk, alone, Lucius. Bring Draco along. There are many things that need to be sorted out!”

Relieved that the show was over and he was in no danger if she accidentally hit him with something, Lucius sighed and nodded, “I agree.” Sneering, he looked at Dumbledore. “Is there somewhere private we can talk?”

Completely amused by the show, Albus chuckled, “Why, yes, Lucius. There is a room right off the bottom of the stairs below us. It's warded as it's a meeting room. You may use that.”

Nodding stiffly, glaring at Narcissa, he said, “Come, both of you. There is much to work out.”

Pretending to shoot her now ex-husband a death glare, Narcissa nodded stiffly then said, “Come, Draco!” Before turning on her heel and striding out.

Whimpering and whining softly, Draco followed, shoulders slumped.

After the door was shut behind the three of them and Lucius made certain no one could hear what was said, he was all but tackled by Narcissa. Smirking, he hugged her back.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you, Lucius!” She told him, kissing him between each word. Breaking it off, she beamed at him, rubbing her hands together.

“It wasn't my doing,” he admitted. “It just happened,” he sighed, shaking his head.

Giving him another big kiss, Narcissa then hugged a whinging Draco tightly, grinning. “This is wonderful! It looks good for everyone and we're divorced! Oh, I'm going to have so much fun!” Kissing the top of her son's head, ignoring his huffing as she messed up his hair, she grinned at Lucius.

“You may, I won't,” Lucius told her, looking mutinous.

“You'll do fine,” she soothed, still grinning. “All we have to do is just work some areas out!”

“Potter is my step-bonded-father or something,” Draco whined, rubbing his eyes.

Petting Draco's hair, Narcissa soothed, “It'll be fine, Draco. Tom is pleased with this! We'll work it out. Don't worry.”

Huffing, Draco pouted, shaking his head.

“There is much to go over, Narcissa,” Lucius told her with a sigh, rubbing his eyes. “First, both of us need to get a hold of our solicitors. It's a real divorce and nothing can be done. When we do, there are things that need to be covered.” Slowly, he walked her through all the parts that needed tending to, like visitation and how to go about it.

Nodding, looking serious, Narcissa took it all in. Yes, things had to go just so for all this to work out.

An hour later, Lucius strode back into Dumbledore's office. Glowering at everyone, he stood stiffly in front of the headmaster's desk. “If everyone is done humiliating us for now, I think I need some rest and would like to go. It's been a trying day!”

Unable to wipe the mirthful look off his face, Albus rose and produced an old quill that was a Portkey. “Yes, we were just waiting for you to return, Lucius. And to make sure you weren't in need of medical assistance.” Motioning to Sirius and Harry, he said, “Just grab the Portkey and it'll take you to the park. Sirius will get you through the wards from there.”

Snatching the quill away, he glowered at Black and Potter, willing them to hurry so that he didn't have to be in the headmaster's presence any longer than necessary.

Shrinking and pocketing Harry's trunk, Sirius put a hand on his godson's back and walked them over to Lucius. Shaking his head, sure that worse was to come, he put his hand on the quill then felt the usual tug behind his navel as Harry did the same. Somehow he was certain that the 'adventure' for the night wasn't over and it might get worse from here on out. However, it was his home and he was going to ensure that Malfoy toed some lines. Oh yes, he and Harry weren't going to put up with any stupid shite from the posh prat!

Please review!
- 2
- 3
- 4
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

"Why Me?"