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What I Choose	By : AquamarieneStardust Category: Harry Potter > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 10185 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the characters from it. I do not make money off of this.

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            The train ride back to school was uneventful as always, I should have felt a sense of excitement, this would be the last year of one of the biggest chapters of my life. All I felt though was anxiety and worry. I sat reading a book while Cessa wrote a secret letter to her favorite sister. When she was finished, I took it and added a few lines to her as well about how much I missed her and how much I wished I could follow in her footsteps and go against my family for the man I love. Andy knew I was special and that if I betrayed the family they would kill me unlike her and Siri, but she had no idea about WHY I was so special to the family.
                I finished the letter, knowing Cessa had told Andy ALL of what she had missed over the summer in this five page monster letter. Once it was sealed with both mine and Cessa’s seals, both the Black crest but mine was slightly larger being from the main line of the family and hers smaller because she was from the secondary line. We each had our own color of wax that we used, unless the letter was to our parents then it HAD to be black for me and mauve for her. Cessa had chosen her favorite color of rose pink, while mine was a mute grey reflecting my inner emotions, it was sad really that I didn’t want color anymore because of this mess with my family, I used to use a bright toxic green wax.
                We send the letter off with Cessa's screech owl Reggy, no not a coincidence she did it on purpose, praying it reaches Andy and she sends us a reply. As Cessa starts to put away her parchment and ink I hold out my hand for a bit of the animal hide paper we used to write on here in the wizarding world. She looks at me sadly and hands of her a bit of it before putting the rest away. I pull the writing desk she had conjured back onto my lap and look at the yellow blank space in front of me a moment. I take a deep breath and sigh before inking my quill.
                Siri,
                I know I have no right to write this to you after what happened at the start of summer. I just thought you would like to know what happened after you left.
                Mother blasted you off the tree, so if you were wondering, you have been officially disowned. You already knew you would be though. Your room has been sealed off, by me under mother’s orders seeing as she couldn’t take your decorations down and turn it into a second parlor for her and her friends. She also made Father get rid of all pictures of you in the house. I went up to the attic and stole the painting of the two of us as well as all of the pictures of the two of us back. I also go and sleep in your room since I am the only one besides you that can enter it now. I miss you so much Siri, and this summer was more than I could handle if you couldn’t tell by the lack of toxic green wax.
                I was made Head Girl and the Captain of the Slytherin team. Father was proud of me, as he always is, but didn’t show it in front of Mother, instead that night when I went up to my room I had a new racing broom, the latest model, on my bed and box of my favorite sweets. I immediately stuck one of my new acid pops in my mouth and went to thank our father who smiled and winked at me sucking on his own. Mother had left to go shopping.
                Now on to the news that is the reason for my misery, and Cessa’s. The night that you left was the night my life officially ended. Mother and Father had decided that day that I would be married to Malfoy’s idiot cousin from France Maxence Rocque. It was also decided that Cessa would marry Lucy seeing as you left and so had Andy. It was a closer Black match than cousin Hyacinth so they decided on that. The worst bit was that our baby brother came and confessed his undying love to me and our parents overheard him. Mother thought it was a wonderful idea and of course Father can’t go against Mother’s will. So now I am engaged to not only Rocque, but also to Regulas. Rocque isn’t a first son so he will take the Black name in our bond. Mother and Father also have been force feeding me fertility potions with the help of my elf whom, as you know, I will never hurt. They have entered us into the pre-bonding ritual, the one that is supposed to have died out, and hope I will conceive a child. This won’t happen though, as I have imperiused Regulas. I feel so guilty about using my curse against my baby brother but the alternative is enough to make me want to take my own life and just end this misery I was born into. If Regulas ever DOES break the imperio, however, he will rape me and take what he wants, I’ve seen it in his mind. I have dealt with THAT though should it ever happen.
                Siri, know that I will ALWAYS love you. I wanted to go with you, to leave this twisted mess that is the Black family, and black it certainly is. But you know that had I left, I would have forfeited my life. You know as well as I do that I would not be allowed to live a life just being disowned from the family. I would have been hunted and killed because Mother and Father would not allow my darkness to be out of their control. I’m just glad HE doesn’t want a wife, for if he had I would have been given to HIM, I thank Merlin, Mordred, and Morgana that he doesn’t know about my curse.
                All my love and more,
                                Carlie
P.S- Andy wants to hear from you. Cessa and I sent off our letter to her before I penned this one to you. I don’t care what Mother says or does. I love you and Andy and I will NOT stop writing to you whether you write back or not.
                I finished my letter tears leaking out of my eyes and blurring some of the words a bit. I spelled the ink dry before kissing the bottom of the page leaving a coffee colored stain from my lipstick. I fold the silly thing and seal it before handing it to my eagle owl Wolf.
                “Take this to Siri. Please hurry!” Wolf hoots softly and takes off out the window of the train to find my twin. I close my eyes sadly. “We should change. The prefect’s meeting is in three hours and I don’t feel like changing closer to time for it.” I say to my cousin, the only person in here with me. We have other friends, but we never sit on the train with them. We find a compartment for the two of us, used to be three before Andy graduated, and spell it closed.
                “I agree. I need to stand and stretch my legs anyway.”
Sirius POV

Sitting in the compartment laughing with my three friends about a story James had told about his disaster date with Lily last week we all nearly jumped out of our skin when an owl tapped on the window.
                “Wolf?” I asked curiously standing up to let my sister’s owl in wondering why it came here instead of to her with the letter he’s got in his beak. He lands on my shoulder and cuffs me affectionately with his wing. I sit back down and he drops the letter into my lap my name written on it in my sister’s gorgeous cursive.
                “Who is it from Padfoot?” James asks from my left. Remus and Peter look at me curiously as well.
                “Carlie.” I tell them just staring at the letter in my hands.
                “Well, open it.” Remus tells me. I look up at him and he smiles reassuringly at me. I nod and take a deep breath before I turn it over. I am instantly worried when I see the ugly grey wax holding the letter sealed instead of the toxic green she favored on her letters not to our parents.
                “What is it Padfoot?” Peter asks seeing the worry on my face.
                “It’s not green.” I tell them looking at the sealing wax.
                “Huh?” the rat shifter asks confused.
                “She always uses her favorite color, toxic green, to seal all of her letters except the ones to Mother and Father. Like the gold I use for my letters to you all. We have to use black to seal letters to Mother and Father.”
                “Well what color is it?” James asks.
                “Mute grey.” I mutter. I miss the brief flash of worry and surprise on my wolf friend’s face. I break the seal and read the tear stained letter.
                “What does it say?” James asks looking at me concerned. He knows how much I love my sister, my need and desire to protect her from everything and how much I miss her. He knows everything about how much I care for her except that part of my reason for wanting to keep her safe is so that she can’t be used as a weapon for our family or the Dark Side because of her curse.
                “Well, she starts off telling me that I am officially disowned. I already knew that though. Mother had every trace of me removed from her sight and had Carlie seal my room. She made it so that only the two of us can get in there. Probably a spell tied to my life. If I die it will break so that people can go in and collect anything important I may have left in my haste to get out.”
                “She can do that?” Peter asks. I nod.
                “She’s powerful, she hates it. Mother and Father really only kept her because of her magical ability, otherwise, Mother has said on numerous occasions, she would have been killed at birth for being a girl.”
                “That’s horrible.” Remus gasps. I nod and continue reading a smile coming to my lips.
                “News for you Moony, Prongs. Carlie has been made Head Girl as well as Captain of the Slytherin team.”
                “That’s great!” Remus exclaims a smile on his face. I knew of his crush on my sister, the others didn’t, and she certainly didn’t, but I did. I thought he would do her some good if he could ever get over the idea that he was too dangerous for a love life.
                “Well, there goes the Quiditch Cup.” James mutters darkly. “She’ll put together an amazing team, and with her at the helm they won’t be able to be beaten.” I bark out a laugh at that knowing how much he hated that she was the only one to EVER beat him at Wizard Chess.
                “Ah but you forget, you have her twin on your team.” I tell him flexing a rock hard arm, toned and strengthened because of my position as beater.
                “Padfoot, you’re forgetting something.” He says smacking the back of my head.
                “Off! What?” I say rubbing the spot, Carls’ letter clutched in my other hand.
                “I have one Black, she has two.” My eyes widen slightly having forgotten about my baby brother. He was as fast as James and always gave him a good run. I smile and chuckle sheepishly knowing right now that Slytherin would be winning the cup again this year. Two years ago and every year before that the snakes hadn’t had a great team, the only good players were Carls and Reg, and Reg didn’t join the team till he was in third year. Carls joined as a second year, I joined as a third year after James talked me into going to tryouts. Last year they took the cup from us thanks to my sister and my brother.
                “Are you going to finish reading your letter?” Peter asks trying to keep James and I from arguing any more. I smile at the rat shifter and go back to the letter. I laugh when I read anecdote about Father’s gifts and her thanking him. She got her love of Acid pops from him and adored freaking Mother out by eating them the candy destroying her mouth before the sham on the stick repairs the damage as soon as you finish it. I continue on my expression going from light, to concerned, to mad then finally settling on horror and outrage.
                “Padfoot?” Remus asks as I grip the letter too tightly my knuckles turning white.
                “They have ruined her life.” I whisper my voice dripping with malice.
                “Who?” James asks placing a hand on my shoulder in comfort. I shake it and stand up pacing the for foot space between the window and the door.
                “Our so called parents.” I growl, my k9 side starting to come thru as I sat on the brink of shifting in my anger. Seeing this Prongs wards the door and draws the blinds.
                “What happened?” Remus asks and I look at him sadness flashing in my eyes for a moment. This will make him madder than we’ve ever seen him, or it will destroy him.
                “They’ve signed a marriage contract for her between her, Maxence Rocque, and you’ll never believe this. It was twisted enough that they wanted me to marry my cousin, I mean the Blacks are inbred enough but THIS!! This is twisted even for our family!!”
                “What is it Padfoot?” James asks watching me closely. I’m breathing heavily now and I catch a whiff of my baby brother walking passed the door with some of his friends. I lunge at the door my wild magic unlocking it as I pull it open and jump on him with a feral scream.
                “WHAT THE HELL! Sirius?” He demands as I land on him pinning him to the ground. My friends rush out into the hall and stun his friends who draw their wands late and fall to the floor. They aim at us but don’t fire wanting to see where I’m going with this. I start to punch my so called brother. Every inch of him I can reach I beat until his skin starts to turn colors.
                “How dare you! How could you ruin her life like this! I thought you loved her. And If you truly DO love her in that VILE EVIL way you would NEVER have told her. You NEVER would have let our parents do this!! You have killed her! She hates herself she would rather DIE than be your wife!!” I hear my friends gasp behind me but I keep wailing on him not stopping.
                “I. Love. Her.” Regulas gets out between punches to his face.
                “NO! If you did you NEVER would have done this to her! This is sick and twisted, even for our family!”
                “What the hell is going on out here?!” I look up and see Carlie leaning out the door four down from where my compartment with my friends was. I hit Reguals one more time before I stand up and run to her hugging her to me chest.
Carlie’s POV

                I hear a ruckus in the hall after we had changed and look at the window. I hear a door slam and a roar before I hear the sounds of a fight and yelling. I can’t make out who it is so I stand up and open the door. I lean out and see my twin beating the piss out of our baby brother while Reg’s friends are all unconscious on the floor and Siri’s friends are watching utter shock and horror on their faces.
                “What the hell is going on out here?!” I demand and Siri looks up his eyes wild and his face contorted in pure rage, I’ve never seen him look this way and I feel a little scared of him for a moment, but it passes when I see Remus holding the crumpled bit of parchment I had written Siri’s letter on and I realize what must have happened. Siri hits Regulas once more and gets off of him. Reg’s head droops to the side as he falls unconscious. He is bruised and bleeding and I don’t care. Siri reaches me and hugs me to his chest. I take a deep breath of his scent, the smell I missed most and was the reason I slept every night in his room now that he is gone, and I start to cry. I cry out every single pent up emotion sobbing into his chest and soaking his shirt. He squeezes me tighter and I wrap my arms around his middle to return the hug.
                “I’m so sorry Carls.” Siri mutters into my hair kissing the top of my head over and over as he strokes my hair in comfort.
                “I never should have left you to deal with Mother on your own. I should have just taken you with me.”
                “Mother would have had you arrested for kidnapping, or she would have used that damned hound of hers to hunt us down and kill us. You can be free of them Siri, but because of my curse I never will be, not until I die.” I say still sobbing and hiccupping into his chest.
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What I Choose