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Hopping Mad (This Ball is Bouncing)	By : Marvolo Category: Harry Potter > General > General Views: 2897 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I don't own any of the Character's, Places or Things from The Harry Potter World. I make NO Money or Profit of Any Kind. The same goes for any unoriginal lyrics or poetry.

Chapter List
- 2
- 3
Hopping Mad (This Ball is Bouncing)
By Marvolo666
Part 3: The Bell of the Ball (The Virtue of Pride)
Not yet beta read.
Parody of Jingle Bells in
...5...
...4...
...3...
...2...
...1...
Nargle bells, Merlin spells
Rowena is a Hag
Godric's steel made Hufflepuff squeal
and Salazar slithered away
HEY!
Yes this is the song written by Uric the Odd Ball
He also wrote the famous carols like
The Christmas Muggle
A Jelly fish for the Holidays
House-elves killed Father Christmas
As well as the Goblin carol
Christmas is for Cannibals...
...
...A dangerously insane human being...
...
Never the less today is Christmas the most Magical day of the year
"For the Muggles at least, For Wizards it's magical every day of the year."
Yes but with constant magic, have we lost our holiday spirit?
Have we forgotten what Christmas is all about?
Presents and eggnog?
No! I meant love, friendship and family.
...And Mistletoe.
Yes I (Bleeping) Love Mistletoe
You can't curse on the Wireless
BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP!
You're hopeless
You're both hopeless
This is Anarchiam, Aναρχία, and Anarhie on the wizarding wireless
"Continue to listen to channel 666...The Nargle!"
"Ha! You thought you could keep us in our original story."
"Nargles out!"
Luna opened her eyes, the wireless was right. It's Christmas Day and tonight was the Yule Ball. Luna let out a cheer that woke up her roommates. "WHOOOOO!"
Luna hopped out of bed full of enthusiasm, intending to run throughout the castle spreading Christmas cheer. In hind sight, that was a mistake.
"OW! Oh Dear..."
Luna hopped out of the hospital wing while Madam Pomfrey shouted after her. "I swear to Morgana if you don't stay off that leg, I will make sure you spend the Holidays tied to a Hospital bed!"
Harry Potter was pacing the Gryffindor common room looking at the atrocity that lay before him. It wasn't much, in fact it was...it was...
"She got you a necklace?" Ron uttered in disbelief.
"It appears so." Hermione replied as she picked up the ugly thing. "I think she wants you to wear it to the ball."
"Told you she was mental." Ron muttered as Harry gave the necklace a closer look.
It truly was the ugliest thing Harry had ever seen. It wasn't just the fact that the string was made of some steely substance or it was covered in Butter beer caps, or that each cap had and ugly faces drawn on it that was clearly supposed to be festive. Unfortunately the face of Frosty looked like a troll and Father Christmas looked close to death. No what really made the necklace so ugly was that it was stained in blood, giving Harry the impression that Luna had cut her finger on the steely substance more than once during the atrocities construction.
"I hope she didn't hurt herself too much." Harry mused as he looked at the object.
"Well...it's the thought that counts." Hermione said uncertainly as he looked back in the small box. "Oh it came with a letter."
Harry quickly took out the small piece of paper and read it out loud.
The Necklace will protect you from Nargles.
Love, Luna Selena Pandora Newt Alice Bruce Lovegood the 3rd.
P.S. Beware of the Hogwarts Yeti. It is rumored to live in Hogwarts and only come out on Christmas...though I think it's pretty far-fetched...it's more likely a Crumple-Horned Snorkack.
Merry Christmas! :)
"How the Bloody hell did she fit all that onto that tiny piece of parchment." Ron frowned. "And why did she drawl the smiley face upside down."
Harry ignored Ron and kept look at the letter...before shouting "(BLEEP)!"
An appalled Hermione shrieked. "HARRY!"
Luna was very happy, Christmas pudding for breakfast was definitely her favorite thing about Hogwarts, even if they only served it on Christmas day. Luna sang as she ate. "Oh, bring us a figgy pudding and a cup of good cheer. We won't go until we get some, so bring some out here...Oh Hello sir, do you have any more figgy pudding."
The house elf, that had appeared in Luna's pudding stepped out of the bowl and wiped his feet on the table. "Dobby is most sorry miss, Dobby didn't bring any...did you call Dobby Sir?"
"Oh sorry, I forgot House elves don't like that." Luna replied quickly,
"No Dobby likes being called sir. Dobby likes it even better then when Silver Whiskers calls Dobby Mr. Dobby." The House elf laughed with a little sway in his step, having already partaken in some butter beer to celebrate the season. "Dobby was asked to bring gift to you from great Harry Potter Sir. Dobby isn't supposed to mention that Harry forgot to give Wuna a present and hopes you like last minute gift. So don't tell don't tell Wuna...SHH."
Luna nodded seriously as she zipped her lip, oblivious to Dobby's words. The house elf handed over a hastily wrapped president before clumsily swaggering away. Luna quickly tore it open and clapped with delight. It was a book called. "Discovering Creatures and Losing Fingers by Newt Scamander."
"It's a first addition!" Luna sighed happily, "Merlin, it's just like the one from the Hogwarts Library!"
At that moment up in the Library. Madam Prince started screaming.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Hours latter Hours Later Hours Later Hours latter Hours Later Hours Later Hours latter Hours Later Hours Later Hours Later Hours Later Hours Later
Harry put on his suit while Ron started cursing about how his made him look like an old lady. Ron was right to complain, the dress did make him look like an old lady who had been dead for three days.
"Why don't you just transfigure it." Harry asked as Ron let out another pitiful moan.
"I can't and Hermione refused to help me, she's still upset with me." Ron groaned.
Harry shook his head as he looked at his ginger haired friend. It was not a good year to be Ron Weasley. "Ron just wear your school robes, I doubt McGonagall will be thrilled but if you go in that thing she'll hand you over to Snape."
"But I don't even have a date." Ron moaned miserably. "The only girl I asked out was Fleur. At least you got Loony Lovegood. Can you please just tell me who Hermione's taking."
Harry glared at his friend. "I promised Hermione I wouldn't and I swear to Merlin if you call Luna that one more time-"
Ron seemed unaware Harry was even there as he continued. "Hell, you could have gone with anyone, even Fleur might have gone with you, probably to take you out of the competition but still-"
"RON! SHUT UP!" Harry shouted.
Ron froze and went silent looking at Harry in shock. Harry shook his head speaking at a normal volume now he had his friends attention. "If you say one more negative thing about yourself or anyone else I'm leaving you here."
Ron just grumbled, "Figures, you're too cool to be seen with me anyway."
"If I cared about that I wouldn't be going with Luna would I." Harry sighed as he sat beside his friend on. "You know I've never cared about that, why should you."
Ron was silent as he fumed internally. Harry spoke to him quietly. "I actually used to wish for those things Ron. I was a loser in Privet drive, bullied and picked on...hell I stil am. I wished I was popular and famous as well, among other things. Then my wish came true and you what? It didn't change a thing. It never changed how I felt, or how my family treated me. It didn't make my life easier, only harder. If you became famous, you'd still be miserable."
"Easy for you to say, you're rich." Ron muttered to himself.
Harry glared at the red head. "You know what Ron, I don't know what it is about this year but you are becoming a real ass. If you think Money will buy you happiness then so be it.
Harry stood up and began rummaging through his school things. Eventually he pulled out a sack full of Galleons and tossed it to Ron. "Here take it, take all of it, there's more where that came from too. I got a whole vault full of this shit. I don't want it! I don't need it!"
Ron spared a glance at the sack of galleons before throwing it back at Harry. "I don't want you charity."
"Why not, it's what you want isn't it." Harry shot back.
Ron turned red as he shouted. "I'm not a charity case, you think I want your handouts. I don't want..."
Harry spoke harsly, "If you took it, you'd still be miserable, in fact you'd feel worse because it was given out of pity. Well ask yourself this Ron, how did I get that money?"
Ron opened his mouth before shutting it. "Oh."
"Yes Ron... Oh!" Harry said bitterly. "I inherited it, from my parents. Not only did I not earn that money, the reason I got it, is the very thing that cost me my happiness. I would give it all away and so much more , if I could have my parents..."
Ron gulped as he looked away. "I'm sorry, I just...It's so hard sometimes."
"Life is hard Ron, even in the Wizarding World but that's the thing Ron, you have it all wrong." Harry sighed as he picked up the Necklace Luna had made, albeit cleaned of blood stains. "Your problem isn't what others think of you Ron, it's what you think of yourself."
Harry rested a hand on Ron's shoulder as he spoke. "Let me give you some advice Ron. You want to be popular, you want the girls to like you? Then you need to start liking yourself. Get your head out of your ass Ron. You do have friends, and you are already popular, but if you don't realize it soon, you're going to lose everything. Do you want people remember you as some winy asshole or someone who is noble and loyal, because people tend to overlook the good in others in order to focus on their flaws.
"If there is one thing I've learnt from being famous, it's that people don't remember your best moments, they remember you at your worst." Harry patted Ron on the back as he stood up. "You're my best friend because you are one of the kindest people I know. I want him back, hopefully I'll see him at the ball."
Harry was nearly out the door when Ron asked. "What do you see in her...in Luna?"
Harry paused as he pondered the answer himself. "I'm not sure...I like her smile...she's always so upbeat when she should be miserable...I guess I see myself in her...or at least...who I want to be."
Ron nodded whispering. "Thanks Harry...Harry?"
Ron looked up but Harry had already left. Ron mulled over Harry's words as his thoughts drifted to another, eventually he muttered under his breath. "Bloody Hell I must be out of my mind...to hell with it. If you're going to make a fool of yourself, might as well do so in front of the entire school."
Luna wasn't nervous, she was terrified. So as she sat in the Ravenclaw common, Luna struggled not to start running in circles, something that Luna would've done by now if it wasn't for Luna's damaged leg. You see Luna was never scared, so being so made Luna quit mad at herself. When Luna was mad at herself Luna would do off things like ramble, bounce in in her seat or refer to herself in first person.
"Will you calm down?" Ginny said as she sat beside Luna, deciding to get ready for the dance with Luna instead of Lavender and the other Gryffindor Gossips. "Calm down Luna, you look great."
Luna looked at her silver dress and frowned. "I don't like it, it's too plain."
Ginny shook her head. "Plain is good, boy's like plain, at least as long as it's pretty. Trust me Harry's going to love it."
"I'm not a dress, I don't want Harry to like a dress, I want him to like me. I don't even know if he wants to be my date." Luna sighed as she looked into the burning fire place. "I don't think this was a good idea."
Ginny laughed. "How do you think Harry will feel if you stand him up for the Yule ball."
Luna looked appalled. "I would never do that!"
"Then for better or worse you are going to that ball." Ginny said with a smirk.
Luna pondered in thought before rising. "I forgot my Necklace, they keep away the Nargles you know...OH!"
Luna began to topple over when Ginny caught and sat her back on the couch. "Luna, if you break that leg one more time you'll miss the ball. Besides you don't need that ugly necklace."
"But...my Mother used to make them for me." Luna whispered sounding hurt.
Ginny suddenly felt like slapping herself, she was not exactly in the greatest moods herself. "I didn't mean it was ugly Luna, It just doesn't go well with your dress. "
"Why not?" Luna asked curiously.
"Bloody Ravenclaws." Ginny muttered before speaking in a comforting voice. "Luna, stop worrying about everything, you are going to have a wonderful, time. If you don't then I will curse Harry into the Stone Age."
Luna looked up both surprised and excited. "You can do that? Can you curse me? I always wanted to go to the Stone Age!"
"Oh look at the time." Ginny blurted out not so subtly cutting off Luna's train of thought.. "I bet Harry and Neville will be waiting for us by now."
Luna perked up and almost leaping to her feet, only for Ginny to stop her with a glare. Luna smiled bashfully.
Hermione and Krum walked down the Hallways with Harry and Neville, both nervous at the prospect of meeting their dates. Harry was sweating and trying to flatten his hair, Neville had already vanished his vomit off the floor. The other three quickly moved away from Neville after that. Harry was frankly worried about Ginny's date. If Neville didn't get a hold of himself he was going to make a very messy scene at the Yule ball in front of the entire school.
The other Champions stood by the entrance to the great hall, resisting the urge to open the large doors and peak inside. Cho was with Cedric and Fleur was with her sister. Harry looked at the Veela and chuckled, it seemed Fleur was as interested in finding a date to the ball as he was. Only she didn't have to worry about the embarrassment of showing up alone.
Half the school had made some sort of advance on her. Fleur's reactions had been mixed. A couple of first years had somehow dared to ask and she sweetly turned them down and handed them the chocolates she had bought, which turned out to be the only reason the first years had asked in the first place. Then there was Crabbe, who asked Fleur in vulgar detail to join him in a broom cupboard and...Lets just say Crabbe is still in the Hospital wing with third degree burns. Fleur was forced to serve detention with Madam Maxine who admitted secretly to some protesting students that the she and Fleur were just drink tea and eating cake.
Cho was smiling at Harry while Cedric was eyeing the exposed skin on Fleur's shoulder stupidly. Cho spoke in a sweet voice. "Hello Harry."
"Hello Chung...I mean CHO!...Your name is Cho...Cho Chung!...Wait Cho...Uh...Chitch? No I mean bitch...NO! Wait no Chang...it Cho Chang. I'm not racist I swear. It's Cho Chang" Harry's face turned red with embarrassment. Luckily Cho seemed to not have understood his panicked and somewhat offensive ramblings. She giggled which would have melted Harry a week ago...now it made his insides curl.
McGonagall walked over to Harry and spoke sternly. "You are almost late and I don't see your date."
"Yeah...she will be here soon...I hope." Harry stuttered as he looked around nervously. "You know, she may be a little slow getting hear on the account of her recent injury."
The Head of Gryffindor stared at Harry for a moment before her eyes widened, then she walked away muttering. "Oh Merlin."
Neville looked up when he heard a voice call out. "Hey Nev, need a little help here."
Neville ran up the stairs to his date before stuttering. "You...Your...very...P...Pretty."
"Snap out of it Neville." Ginny snapped before whispering in his ears. Ginny looked between her and someone out of view before shaking his head nervously. Ginny whispered again in Neville's ear who immediately pulled out his wand and walked out of Harry's eye sight.
Suddenly Neville and Ginny came back into view with their wands raised. In between them was the levitating figure of Luna Lovegood. Harry's looked on stunned, Luna looked even more ethereal than usual, likely because she was floating down the stairs in a dress of pure silver. Neville's arm started to shake and Neville called out. "Harry...little help."
It was then that Harry realized this was more than just a grand entrance, Luna was in great danger of falling down the stairs and doing more damage to her leg. Harry rushed forward and cast, "Wingardium Leviosa."
Neville let his arm rest as Harry helped Luna down the last couple stairs. Harry helped Luna land steadily as he held on to her shoulders. Harry smiled trying hard not to stutter. "You look beautiful Luna."
Luna blushed as she looked away before saying. "Thank you Harry, you look beautiful too."
Harry blushed for a completely different reason while an eavesdropping Ginny whispered loudly. "You're not supposed to call him beautiful."
Luna looked over to Ginny with a tilt of her head and asked. "What am I supposed to say?"
Ginny looked at Luna as her face twitched with disbelief. "How about handsome!"
"But doesn't that mean pretty?" Luna asked while Harry and Hermione tried to hold in their mirth.
"It's OK." Harry said with a slight chuckle, noticing the way McGonagall was looking at them. Her face held a sense of foreboding and resignation.
Ginny quickly gave Luna a hug and whispered good luck to her before she and Neville scurried into the Great Hall.
Minerva spoke in her sternest voice. "Form a line with your dates. When I signal you, walk down the path to the table normally reserved for the Hogwarts staff and sit in your assigned seats. When dinner is over you and your date will walk out into the center of the room and dance the first waltz as is tradition. Afterwards a very special guest will be performing and you can do as you please for the remainder of the evening. You will be on your best behavior and act like the honorable students you are. Represent your schools with dignity and class...and may Merlin have mercy on us all."
Harry had a feeling McGonagall glanced at him and Luna for her parting words but Luna paid them no mind. She seemed to be staring at Cho with great interest. Cho looked back at her with a combination of shock, anger and flat out confusion. Luna frowned and shook her head before speaking to McGonagall. "Professor, I don't think you removed all the Wrackspurts from Cho Chang's brain."
Minerva just shook her head in dismay as she strutted into the Great Hall. Harry looked a Luna and whispered. "You need help?"
Luna slowly nodded as she nervously put an arm around Harry's neck. Harry helped her move into a line with other champs. Krum and Hermione were talking excitedly. Fleur was giggling with her sister while standing three feet away from Cedric when he started to drool on her dress. Cho grumbled as she yanked her date back by the collar of his suit.
Minerva came back and gave the champions a nod before opening the doors to the Great Hall.
Luna's eyes widened as she looked around in wonder, Luna was seen by many to be untameable when in truth it was the exact opposite. Everything was bewildering to Luna, one just had a hard time telling. Luna constantly tried to take in the world around her and when she wasn't she was thinking about the endless possibilities of life, the universe and the Quibbler. With this in mind Luna was completely bewildered by the sights and sounds before her, causing a small smile to form on her face as she looked around the Great hall.
It was truly the most beautiful sight she had ever seen. The Great hall was unrecognizable. The walls were sparkling in a bluish white colour that reminded her of ice. The four corners of the hall had Christmas trees reaching as high as the ceiling, which had snow falling from it that vanished just before reaching everyone's heads.
Instead of four long tables, the Hall was filled with small circular tables, leaving room for the center of the room, which was a perfect circle where everyone would soon dance. At the front of the hall, the Professor's table remained the same, only with seats surrounding it, so Ministry Officials as well as the Champions and their dates could sit together.
As Luna limped down the path to the table, she looked around her. The students were all rather pretty, some more so then others, in fact, even Crabbe and Goyle didn't look to bad, though Luna suspected glamour charms were used to make them look thinner. Luna was wondering who cast such advanced charms on the two simple Slithering when she realized half the female population was looking at her. The other half was looking at Hermione with the same look of shock and disbelief. The boy's were mostly just drooling at the sight of Fleur, which only added fuel to the fire of their infuriated dates.
Luna had the attention of most of the Ravenclaws who more than anyone were glaring at her with jealousy. Luna couldn't explain it but she felt her smile grow as the male students started taking notice of Hermione and Luna herself. Luna looked back at Hermione who had a giddy smile and a prideful look in her eyes. Luna could feel the same pride within her grow as she noticed Cho was still glaring at her.
Luna looked up at her handsome date and realized he looked as nervous as Luna felt. Harry was staring straight ahead stiffly but looked at Luna when he felt her eyes on him. Luna blushed as she looked down before glancing up at Harry, The two found themselves trapped in each other's eyes for a split second before they both looked away blushing. Luna was now beaming with pride, for the first time in her life she felt...she wasn't really sure what she felt but she liked it. She wanted to say beautiful but she felt that way many times before. Frankly she usually felt more pretty then she did in this plain dress of silver. Maybe she was just feeling giddy from the Wrackspurts.
Luna's thoughts her cut off as Harry helped her to her seat. Soon everyone was sitting down and Dumbledore announced the start of the Yule ball, only to be reminded by McGonagall that they needed to have dinner first. Everyone sat down and began eating. Luna looked at the menu and noticed Dumbledore pick up his own and utter one of the entrées, the food appeared on his plate. Harry seemed to notice this as he did the same. Luna looked back at her menu and frowned. Nothing on the menu sparked her appetite. Luna looked around and shrugged before stating. "Pudding."
Many of the champions sitting near her looked at her strangely before returning to their dinner. Luna again asked for pudding but nothing happened. Harry who was sitting next to her leaned over and whispered. "I think it has to be on the men-"
"Oh," Luna exclaimed as she realized her mistake. "Silly me, Figgy pudding."
Sure enough the figgy pudding appeared on her plate. Luna beamed and clapped her hands before digging into her food. Harry laughed, while others quickly started ordering their favorite foods. Fleur vanished her food and asked for some escargot, while her sister copied Luna's order of pudding and to the dismay of the table ate with her hands. Harry chuckled as he spoke. "So you like pudding."
Luna nodded with a mouthful of pudding before she swallowed to speak. "Yes but I do like lots of other things as well. Really as long as it's full of lots of healthy sugar then I'm happy."
Harry frowned. "Isn't sugar unhealthy?"
Luna leaned forward and whispered conspirator. "That's what they want you to think."
Harry nodded as if he understood, but really he didn't have a clue what she was talking about. He'd have to ask Hermione later...wait Hermione was right here. Harry looked over to his friend and saw her frowning. "Where's Ron?"
Harry shrugged. "He didn't want to come, started getting all jealous again, don't worry I think I set him straight, but I'm still not certain he's coming."
Hermione sighed sadly. "Pity it really is wonderful isn't it."
Harry nodded as he glanced at Luna. Who was looking at him with pudding on her face. Harry grabbed a napkin and gently wiped it off, causing Luna to look away with a feint blush. Harry glanced back at Hermione who gave him a mischievous wink. Harry quickly looked back down at his food with an equally red face.
Luna looked up from her pudding and caught the eye of Ginny among the students giving her thumbs up. Luna smiled and noticed Hannah Abbot was sitting on the other side of Ginny's date and the two were talking animatedly. Neville seemed more happy then Luna had ever seen him while Ginny just looked nervous. Luna wasn't sure what that was all about but when she looked back at Harry, Luna forgot to care.
Ginny and Hermione both noticed Luna staring dreamily at Harry, causing the latter to snort as she struggled to swallow soup. Krum gave Hermione a few pats on the back as she blushed with embarrassment.
Luna forgot all about pudding, she instead contemplated how she could be so lucky. Sitting up here beside the sweetest boy she had ever met. Luna felt her heart melt with happiness as she whispered. "Thank you for bring me Harry, this really is magical."
Harry looked back at his date and smiled. "I should thank you, I didn't think I was going to be able to invite anyone."
Luna tilted her head. "You could have invited anyone. Your handsome and charming and sweet and-"
Harry blushed as he cut her off. "That's clearly not the case otherwise Cho wouldn't have turned be down."
Luna felt her smile falter as her pride plummeted. "You asked Cho first..."
Harry nodded before glancing at Luna. "Yeah it was before I met you, and before I found out what a jerk she was. I...I don't like bullies."
Luna's smile returned in full force as her glee filled her. "Thank you for not going with Harry, Cho." Luna said innocently with a bright smile on her face. Cho just stared daggers at Luna before cutting through her stake and the plate underneath it.
Then Harry took her hand and whispered with a nervously blush. "Frankly I'm glad she turned me down, I'd rather be here with you."
Luna forgot all about pride and Cho as Harry took her hand. She simply swooned as she looked up into Harry green eyes. "I...um...I..."
"Everybody, it is time for the Yule Ball to begin, please rise as the four Champions and their dates open the ball for the first dance."
Harry nodded as Luna wrapped an arm around his shoulder to stand up. Luna didn't need this much attention but wasn't going turn down a gesture that brought her closer to Harry. Still, dancing was going to be a problem. Even without the broken leg, being near Harry was making Luna feel feint.
As the four Champions and their dates entered the circle. Luna uttered softly. "I don't think I can dance Harry."
"Don't worry I have a plan." Harry whispered as he looked down the hall. and to the bulbous eyes of a very tipsy house elves. "Just follow my lead."
"I'll try." Luna replied nervously, suddenly she was terrified. What if she made a fool of herself, what if everyone laughed at her, what if she did something stupid Harry didn't like her anymore...
Luna shook her head with a frown, since when did she care about any of those things, it was strange but for once Luna really just wanted a perfect magical night.
Luna sadly did not get her wish, but only history will tell if this was actually bad thing. Harry looked around to the room as the Dumbledore stood and raised his wand to the band. "Let the Yule Ball begin."
Harry grinned as he held Luna in his arms. "And here we go."
The music started and the madness began...
So I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I realized I bit off more then I could chew making Hopping Mad three chapters. The Yule ball alone could take up three chapters though next one could be the last. Ether way I hope you all continue to enjoy this wacky story full of heart, romance and comedy. With The Curious Case of Luna Lovegood going into darker and drama filled territory as it slowly approaches its climax, I've been able to get a lot of my fluff and humor out in this tale. Please Favorite, Follow and Review and remember, "The fighter still remains."
Nargles out
- 2
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Hopping Mad (This Ball is Bouncing)