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Eye of the Beholder	By : BlueSchmoo Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female Views: 3725 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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- 33
Chapter 33. Reasons Why

They apparated out of the Black Room of the Malfoy Manor, to within a stone�s throw away from Snape�s carriage. Since it is impossible to apparate in or out of Hogwarts, this was the accepted method of travel � taking a carriage to just outside the school�s gates, then apparating from there to the intended destination.

Waiting patiently until Sasha�s vertigo had passed, an unfortunate side effect of apparating, Snape guided her into the carriage. He sat beside her on the cold seat, still supporting her. She firmly held his left hand in both of hers, and squeezed it tightly in appreciation. The excitement of the recent events at the Malfoy Manor had passed, and as the adrenaline left her system she was left feeling very tired, frightened and insecure. She had the unshakeable feeling that the memory charm would not work, and that Lucius was right behind them, following them back to Hogwarts. The feel of Snape�s strong hand in hers reassured her.

They did not speak during the ride back to the school. Instead, they each took that time to understand and digest what had happened in the previous few hours, truly realizing the implications of what they had just done.

Once again, Snape was amazed at the courage Sasha had shown to even attempting such a dangerous plan. Ravenclaws were known for their intellie, ae, and Snape knew many of them were master strategists and tacticians, but to actually participate in a plan � that was generally left to the Gryffindors. Snape looked down at Sasha and shook his head. Amazing; she truly was incredible, he thought. But then again, she had experienced so much as a child, and had shown an inner strength that many adults never achieved, so maybe he should not be so surprised.

Snape knew that the recent events at tark ark Revel were something they would have to discuss with Dumbledore. He also knew Sasha would probably not be comfortable telling him all the details, but he hoped she would be willing. Besides, it was probably easier of she told her story only once, rather than twice � to Snape, then again to the Head Master.

"Sasha," Snape asked gently, hiice ice seeming very loud in the confines of the carriage. She looked up at him, her face hidden in the shadows. "This is very important. I must ask if you would be willing to discuss the events of this evening in front of the Head Master. I believe there are some elements to this that would be of interest to him."

She looked away from Snape without answering, her gaze falling on the passing landscape outside. Was she ready to talk about it? She really had not yet completely accepted what had happened. However, she realized, Snape was right. Dumbledore had always been kind to her, and she knew Snape told him everything he did with regards to his involvement with the Death Eaters. She turned around to look up into Snape�s black eyes.

"You will be there too?" she asked hesitantly. She wanted the comfort of his presence, and did not want to be alone in the next while. She could still not shake off her feeling that Lucius would try again to get her.

Snape�s impassive face softened slightly, and he brought his other hand up to brush a lock of hair away from her eyes. "Of course I will," he replied.

She turned her head back to look out the window, and nodded in the darkness, but Snape did not see that. "OK then."

The Thestrals brought the carriage around to the front of the main entrance. Snape and Sasha descended, and made their way inside. It was after midnight, and the sl wal was deserted, but Snape knew this meeting could not wait until tomorrow. He and Sasha made their way up to the entrance to the Head Master�s office, and the two guard doors opened in anticipation at their approach, without the need of a password. Snape was very surprised at this, but did not let it show. He realized the Head Master must have been expecting them. He and Sasha stepped onto the ascending staircase, and up to Dumbledore�s office.

Dumbledore was sitting in his usual spot behind his desk, writing, when they entered. Doesn�t that man ever sleep? Snape thought briefly. He put his quill down and motioned them to sit in the chairs before him. Dumbledore�s face reflected the worry he felt for the two people sitting in front of him.

He addressed them both. "I have been very, very concerned about the both of you," he said gravely. "First of all, are you alright?" he asked looking at each of them in turn.

Sasha nodded, but Dumbledore noticed how close to Snape she sat, and how her hands were balled into fists. He realized she needed to talk about what had just happened to her, and that she was drawing strength from Snape�s presence. That bit of knowledge was a bit of good news to him � that Sasha and Snape�s relationship was still intact after this evening�s events.

"Good. Now, I realize that there was a Dark Revel planned for tonight, and I know that Severus, you left here by carriage to attend. Just after 10 p.m., the guardians from the Ravenclaw common room portrait informed me that Crabb and Goyle had gained access using the correct password, and were looking for someone. Since Sasha is the only Ravenclaw here over the holidays, I knew they must have been looking for her. I enlisted the help of all the portraits and searched the castle looking for you," Dumbledore said, staring over his glasses at Sasha. "But you were gone. I could only assume the worst, that they had come for you."

"Now, I want you to tell me everything that happened. Don�t leave anything out, as inconsequential as it may seem." Dumbledore finished, and looked at Sasha with concern.

She swallowed, taking a moment to gather her thoughts. "Well," she stalled, at a loss of where to begin. She looked up at Snape, into his emotionless face. His eyes were encouraging her to be honest. She turned back to face Dumbledore. She would tell him the basic facts, but she thought it would be best if she left out anything that would let on that she and Snape were involved in a relationship that was any more than student-teacher.

"It started the other day, after Lucius turned up in the lab." He voice was still rough, but she continued anyway. "The day you warned us," she said, staring at Dumbledore. "He told Professor Snape to make some potions for the Dark Revel, and Lucius basically threatened both of us if he did not make them. So, Professor Snape really did not have much choice. After Lucius left I asked Professor Snape what they were for. Rather reluctantly, he told me. Lucius did not even try to hide the fact that Professor Snape was involved with the Death Eaters, so that was how I found out about that." She took a deep breath, and continued, relaxing somewhat in being able to finally talk about everything.

"The night before he was supposed to go to the Dark Revel, we both realized that there was a good chance that Lucius would try to come and get me, forcing me to be one of the unfortunates for the Dark Revel as a way to get back at Professor Snape. Even thought Professor Snape told me to stay within my common room, and that the house wards would protect me, I knew, somehow, that Lucius would still come."

She paused for a moment, trying to decide if she should tell Dumbledore about her past. About how she and Snape, Lucius and Avery had met previously one day a long, long time ago.

"Sasha? Are you OK to continue?� she heard a soft voice ask, breaking into her thoughts. She looked up into Dumbledore�s concerned face, and nodded her head.

"The reason I say I knew he would still come is that it was a personal thing. Not just between Professor Snape and Lucius, but between both of them and me." Dumbledore glanced at Snape, then looked back at Sasha. Snape�s face had gone a paler shade of white.

"You see, while I never remembered the incident the lead up to me receiving my scar, Lucius did. As it turned out, Avery was respole, le, Lucius was there and witnessed the whole thing, and�" Sasha looked over at Snape. Despite his unease at discussing this, he still encouraged her to continue with a very slight nod of his head.

"�And Professor Snape was there was well, although he left before anything happened to me," she finished quietly.

"This was during the time I was active with the Death Eaters," Snape said quietly, hoping Dumbledore would understand. Snape turned back to Sasha. "Go on," he encouraged. She did.

"Anyway, once I realized that there was no way Lucius could pass up the opportunity to come for me, I had to think of a way of protecting myself. Professor Snape had left for the Dark Revel already, and the last thing I wanted was to end up as an unfortunate. So, I left the common room, and went down to the lab. And I stole some Polyjuice potion from his stock cabinet," she admitted reluctantly. Sasha turned to face Snape.

"I�m sorry about that," she said regretfully. He smiled his forgiveness, but was angry with her for not staying where he had asked her. Sasha continued.

"On Lucius�s second visit, when he revealed to us about being there when Avery attacked me, I became angry, and grabbed some of his hair. A few strands came out, and I kept them. It wasn�t until a while later I got the idea of the Polyjuice. I really did not know what exactly I was going to do, but I planned on drinking it, and somehow getting Professor Snape and I away from there. It wasn�t until after Lucius and I drank the potions and we turned into each other, that he realized what was going on, and attacked me." She looked over at Snape again. "And that was when you came in and found us," she said.

"For the rest of the night, I was so frightened that someone would realize I wasn�t Lucius. However, once the silencing spell was cast upon him, I just acted how I thought he would, and tried not to say too much. I did not know what he and Avery had planned to do to me, but as it turned out, he was the one who experienced everything�" She trailed off quietly, remembering the horrible, silent screams that came out of her mouth, but that she never felt. The sight of Avery carving up her face made her sick, but a small part of her mind felt satisfaction that for once, Lucius was the one receiving the torture, not giving it out.

As her mind focussed back into reality, she became aware that both men were staring at her. She must have been quiet for some time, thinking back to the dank room with the smells of blood, vomit and sex. A small shudder coursed through her, and she peered over at Snape.

"I was so frightened of you," she admitted, reaching out to grasp his hand. She did not care at this point if Dumbledore saw or not. "I told you once that if this were ever to happen, if Lucius were ever to capture me, that you were not to try to rescue me. But you did. You were ready to give yourself up to stop them from hurting me. There was no way I could have let you know who I really was in front of Avery, so I kept pretending I was Lucius."

Sasha now fully understood what Snape was ready to give up for her. By conceding to �Lucius�, in order to stop the torture on �Sasha�, he was ready to give himself over to them to save her. He cared for her that much. He loved me that much, she realized. Her heart started to beat faster at the knowledge, and she felt her own emotions start to overwhelm her. She tore her eyes away from Snape�s, and turned back to Dumbledore. She wanted to finish off their interview, and talk to Snape in private.

"Basically, Professor Snape managed to persuade Lucius to stop the torture, and he picked up my body. When the three of us were walking back to the room we apparated into, I sta to to feel the effects of the Polyjuice wear off, and knew we did not have much time before Lucius would transform back into himself. That was when Professor Snape realized what was happening, and what I had done. He cured the wounds on Lucius�s face, charmed his memory, and apparatus us back to Hogwarts grounds. And here we are," she finished.

Dumbledore sat back, and looked at the two in front of him. He was sure there were a few details Sasha had left out, but he was satisfied she had told him enough.

"I have one question for you, Sasha. How did Lucius gain entry into Hogwarts in the first place?" he asked quizzically.

"Through the fireplace in Professor Snape�s office," she replied. She saw Dumbledore briefly close his eyes, then re-open them.

"I am afraid that is my fault," he said regretfully. "When I opened that fireplace to the floo network over Christmas so the two of cou could join us at dinner time, I instructed the Ministry of Magic to close it the next day. I never followed up to make sure that was completed. I believe Lucius must have a spy in the Ministry somewhere, and he was probably responsible for keeping it open despite my orders." Dumbledore shook his head gravely, angry with himself. "I will look into this matter very carefully."

"Now, I can imagine the both of you are very tired, so I will not keep you. I will assure you I will immediately close the floo connection myself, and reset the passwords to all of the House common rooms. Severus, Sasha, you shared a very unique experience this evening, I believe it would be valuable if you spent a bit more time discussing these events. Severus, if you don�t mind, I would appreciate it if you would keep an eye on Sasha for the next few days. She has experienced a very disturbing event, and I want to make sure she feels safe back here at Hogwarts."mblembledore looked at Snape in the eyes, and Snape was not too sure if he saw that damn twinkle appear there or not.

"Yes, Head Master," Snape replied.

"Now, if you will excuse me, I have some people at the Ministry of Magic to awake," Dumbledore said seriously. Snape and Sasha took the hint and stood, walking out the office door and down the revolving stairs.

Once the doors ed bed behind them, Snape looked around the empty halls, then down at Sasha�s upturned face. She looked tired and pensive, and he wondered how she was doing.

"Well, Sasha, what would you like to do now?" he asked softly. "Are you hungry at all?"

Sasha took a deep breath before answering. "What I would really like is to take a bath and get the smell of the Revel off me," she replied honestly. She hesitantly reached out her hand and took his much larger one in hers. "Would you mind if I stayed with you tonight?" she asked. She looked at him, and without voicing it, he knew she did not want to be alone, and needed the comfort of his presence. He did not mind at all. In fact, there were things he wanted to ask her that would not have been appropriate in front of Dumbledore.

He allowed a genuine smile to appear on his lips as he reached out and cupped her face with his free hand.

"I would like that more than you could ever imagine," he replied. Together, hand in hind, they walked down the hall towards the dungeons. To Snape�s room.
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Eye of the Beholder