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Both Sides	By : ccino49 Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female Views: 10429 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 31
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I do not own any of the characters or places from the Harry Potter books or films. They all belong to J.K. Rowling. All that is mine is Lou and the plot. I am not making any money from the writing of this story.

Both Sides.

CH 32 Back to Number 12

�That is something you will have to figure out on your own. If someone genuinely likes you for yourself Lou, they will ask for nothing but your company. There is something else I would like to discuss with you�
�What?�
�At Hogwarts, all students have communal accommodation, they share a bedroom and bathroom. How do you feel about that? I know how self conscious you are about your markings.�
�The stripes don�t bother me, or the scar on my leg, but the other, I don�t �I couldn�t bear it if someone saw it.�
�The Headmaster is willing to give you a private room and bath if you so wish, but it would most likely cause you to suffer alienation from your housemates. They will see it as you being given preferential treatment. Is that something you could cope with?�

�Yes. I would rather they don�t like me because I have my own room, then see what I am and hate me for that.�
�Lou, just because the words exist, it does not mean that is what you are. You are not, and never were the devils spawn. The man who did that to you, he is the true devil, not you. I want you to remember that.�
Lou nodded and said softly. �I�ll try. Sometimes it�s �you know, hard. But I�d still rather no one sees. Only you�ve seen it, I want to keep it that way. Please.�

�If that is your wish, I shall let the Headmaster know.
For the next few days, Severus and Lou spent a lot of time together, getting to know each other, talking about Hogwarts, discussing the subjects he�d instilled in her while she slept.

He�d performed the medi-training spell and she was taken to the classroom to practice making potions.
Severus was proud of the dexterity she demonstrated when preparing her ingredients and brewing her potions. She focussed intently as she worked and would not be distracted for a second.

�She will certainly give Granger a run for her Galleons.� He thought smugly.
A golem was provided with injuries such as Severus received during his summonses to the Dark Lord, and Lou would heal it. She knew she�d done it right when the golem disappeared.
Lou hated is at first. The golems were so life like that she panicked, she couldn�t accept that they were not real people with real feelings.

�But he�s screaming in pain, he can feel it, it hurts him Severus.� She cried, tears streaming down her face.. �I don�t like it. Will you be like this?�
�I have been. Lou, a golem is I suppose, the equivalent of what a muggle would call a robot.�

�No it�s not. Robots don�t bleed, they don�t hurt and cry.�

Eventually she hardened herself, though not completely, and healed each golem as it presented itself. She couldn�t shut out the thought that Severus had suffered those kind of injuries, or that he might again.

It was that thought that made her determined to do her best at healing the golems, so she could help Severus when it did happen.

Above all, Lou hoped it would never happen, that something really bad would happen to Voldemort and Severus would not be called to him again.
�Tomorrow is the last day you �we have before we have to go to Hogwarts, is there anything special you would like to do?� He asked her on Wednesday evening. �Tomorrow night you will be staying at Number 12, ready to catch the Hogwarts express with the others.�

�Can�t we just apparate?�

�I shall be doing so, you will travel along with the other students. Lou I do hope you have remembered that once at Hogwarts, I shall be nothing more than a Professor to you, and you shall be merely another student to me. I shall not treat you any different to the other students. In fact I may be harder on you than most, so I expect you to do your best and not cause me to have to take points or give you detention. At Hogwarts I am at my most unpleasant, you have not experienced that side of me. You have a great advantage in several subjects, that is something I expect to see reflected in your marks, but do not show off to the others, I expect you to work hard at and excel. You said you would not let me down Lou, make sure that you do not.�
�I�ll do my best, I promise.�

�I want more than your best, remember that, and keep a tight reign on your temper, or else. I still intend to give you additional punishments if you do not. Above all of this Lou, I wish you to remember one more thing.�

�What?�
�That I am still your friend, and that I do care about you.�

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a short slender stick. With a flick of a finger, it became a walking cane. �I do hope you will use this only for the purpose of helping you to walk. I do not want to hear from Madam Pomfry that students are in the infirmary due to you using it as a weapon.�
�I wont, I promise, and I�m glad you�ll stay my friend, even if you can�t show it. Can I try and walk now?�

Lou was totally fed up of being floated or carried everywhere. She was dreading the idea of being floated to and from classes in front of the whole school. At least if she had a cane, she could get about on her own.
�Speaking of which, Madam Pomfry will check your wound each day and change the dressing. I have given you a good supply of potions and suave, should you need more, you will ask the medi-witch.�
Severus helped her to stand and placed the cane in her right hand, all the while keeping a firm grip on her left arm.
�This is not like your previous cane. Your leg is in a much worse condition than before so I need you to use it correctly. Each time your right foot touches the floor, make sure the cane does so simultaneously, most of the weight is to go on the cane. It may feel light, but it is spelled to do so. In fact it is very strong and can bear a greater load than you would put on it. Do not attempt to run, take your time and you will be fine.�
Lou did as he said and slowly walked around the room. It was hard, her leg had never been this weak before, and she found it hard to make it move forward.

�My foot�s dragging, it�s like I can�t feel my whole leg. Will it always be like this?�

�I do not know. The infection destroyed a lot of the nerve endings and attacked the ligaments. I am hoping that you will gain more control than you have now, but I cannot promise it will be so.�
The prospects for her leg at the moment were not good, and he was secretly working on a potion of his own invention that he hoped would repair the damaged nerves and ligaments, but he was not going to tell her, in case it did not work, or he did not get the opportunity to see it through to completion.
�You will be at Hogwarts wont you? You wont leave me again? If you did, I couldn�t bear it.�
�No, I shall be staying. I have to win your confidence and bring you over to the side of the Dark remember.�
�Oh yeah, how are you gonna do that then?� She asked him with a cheeky grin.
�I have my methods, I can be very persuasive when I want to be.� He told her, his voice almost purring as he spoke.
Lou was startled to find herself shivering pleasurably at his voice and tore her eyes away from his, scared he might see what she was feeling, and embarrassed that she felt it at all. It wasn�t a feeling she�d experienced before and she didn�t know how to react to it.
Severus however realised straight away what happened, it had not been his intention to make her feel any kind of desire. He straightened and let go of her arm. �Try it on your own now.� He told her, his voice tight, hoping it would have the effect of deterring her from feelings she was obviously unfamiliar and uncomfortable with.
He watched as she staggered, more than walked the length of the room, a couple of times she grabbed hold of a chair back to steady herself.
�I think I want to spend tomorrow practicing how to walk, if I turn up at school like this, they�re gonna think I�m a puppet with a broken string.�
At Severus� confused expression, she explained what puppets were and how they worked. She told him about glove puppets, finger puppets and string puppets. Marionettes they�re called, at least I think they are.
�I hardly think you would be confused with one of those.�
�Don�t you? If you saw one, you�d think differently, believe me.� She laughed.
Severus didn�t argue with her. For one; he�d never seen one of these puppets she spoke off, and two; if her description was correct, than she might be correct in her assumption. Though he certainly hoped not, the last thing he wanted was for her to suffer jibes and bullying because she was unable to walk normally. It would hurt him as much as it would hurt her and he would be unable to anything about it, at least openly.
The following day was spent walking, walking and more walking. It was accompanied by an array of potions to try and strengthen the leg, decrease the pain, and lots of pepper-up potion when she started to flag. Lou was determined she would walk as close to normal as possible when she boarded that train tomorrow. Unfortunately the leg did not agree.
�Enough.� Severus told her at around three o�clock that afternoon. �Lou, it is something that will only happen over time, not by sheer will alone, I am sorry. Rest now, otherwise you may find yourself having the opposite effect to what you want.�
�Yeah, your right.� She said with a sigh. �Do you think Madam Hooch managed to do anything with my broom. At least if I can fly, it wont be so bad.�
�Until she meets you and knows your specific difficulties, she will not be able to do anything. That is not to say that you will not fly Lou. I am certain that something can be done, meanwhile, you have a trunk to pack. All of your school things need to be packed, and I dare say you will wish to take that hideous muggle attire with you for the weekends.�
�It�s not hideous, all my new stuffs nice. Tonk�s took me to all the best shops in London and she said I look cool in my new things. I didn�t go in a single second hand shop while we were there. I haven�t even looked at my school uniform, it�s packed already. I couldn�t go with Mrs Weasley because we couldn�t get the cuff off, so Madam Malkin used the measurements from when you took me. All my other school things are still packed as well, you had everything I needed for lessons here. Anyway, Hermione showed me a spell that packs everything neatly in minutes.�
�Is that so? Then you have the rest of the afternoon to do as you please, as long as it does not involve being on your feet. After dinner, I shall take you to number 12.�
�Are you staying there tonight?�

�No, I am returning to Hogwarts this evening. I need to ensure that everything is in order, the rooms ready for the students arriving, and that my lesson plans are up to date. And remember, do not attempt to speak to me unless it is to ask or answer questions in class. Other than that, there should be no need for us to have any kind of contact or conversation. I shall arrange for your owl to be brought down in the morning.�
�I hope he hasn�t forgotten me, it�s been ages since I�ve seen him.�
�I doubt that would happen, he has been well looked after and is quite content.�
�I know, but I�ve missed him. Why didn�t you let me keep him with me?�

�Because I do not appreciate the mess they leave in their wake. The owlery is there for a purpose Lou, birds do not belong in bedrooms, at least not in my manor.�
�I thought it was because I wasn�t allowed to write to Ginny.�

�You should have told me you wished to do so, I would have arranged for you to correspond.�
�Now you tell me. Never mind, I�ll see them later and we can talk all we want. Do you think they�ll still be my friends?�
�Why should they not be? If they are genuine about wanting to know you, the fact you have not sent a letter should not matter.�
�Your right, as usual. Severus?�
He lifted his head to look directly into her eyes. �What?�
�I�m scared.�
�Of what?�

�Tomorrow, school, the sorting, the other students, letting you down, disappointing you. Everything.�
�Silly girl.� He said softly, moving to sit next to her on the sofa. �Lou everyone is nervous about new and strange surroundings, you will not be on your own in that department. Just remember that each and everyone of those students is most likely to be just as wary and shy of you, as you are of them. As for disappointing me, I think you would find that extremely difficult to do. And I do not believe you will let me down, so stop worrying. okay?�
Lou nodded and sniffed. She felt it was easier said than done. She felt terrified at the thought of letting him down, not because she was afraid of being punished, but because she wanted him to be proud of her. �What if I muck up?�

�You try harder.� He said. �Now, I have packing to do, even if you do not. I shall see you at dinner.�

�Cassia. Make sure she does not use that leg for the rest of the afternoon.� He told the elf as soon as she appeared.
�Yes Sir, Cassia is making sure.�
As soon as dinner was over that evening, Severus had her bundled up in a warm cloak, her trunks shrunk and in his pocket with his own, and Validus was in his cage waiting for her at the main entrance.

�I have something for you.� he told her before they left.

�For me? What is it?�

He handed her a parcel, about 12 inches by 8 inches. It was flat and Lou pressed and poked at it gently, trying to guess what was inside.
�I find it prudent to remove the wrapping from a gift, it helps to discover what is being given.�
�I know, I�m just �trying to guess what it is first.� She removed the paper and had trouble believing that what she held was real. Is this �are they �Severus?� She looked up at him, tears brimming over her eyes. �Is it? How? Where?�
�That is your mother.� he said, pointing at a beautiful golden haired, blue eyed witch. �And your father.� He said a little less graciously, indicating the picture of Sirius Black, holding tightly onto Orvokki Nilsen. �As for how and where, it was a simple enough task. Do you remember the album you retrieved from your mothers vault. It turned out to contain several photos of them both. I simply selected the best one, and had it framed for you.�
�I �how can I ever thank you for this? I can say it, but it isn�t enough, it will never be enough.� She flung her arms about his neck and clung to him for all she was worth. She didn�t care if he pushed her away any second now. He�d just done something that meant the world to her, and she didn�t care about reprisals.
Severus stood frozen to the spot, unable to believe what was happening. She was clinging to him like a limpet and was clearly in need of emotional comfort, not something he was used to giving. He brought his arms up from his side hesitantly and paused, before placing them loosely around her shoulders. This had the effect of making Lou cling tighter to him. The trouble was, she was unwittingly pressing her body against his and it was causing his own body to respond.
�Lou.� He said, his voice slightly husky. �We need to �go.�
Lou relaxed her grip and let go. �Right. I�m sorry, I forgot I�m not supposed to �I�m sorry.� She said again, her head lowered. She too had reacted at the closeness between them and was unable to look at him. She could feel her nipples pressing painfully against the fabric of her bra, and her knickers felt damp. It wasn�t something she�d meant to happen, she was just grateful for the photo. The results of the hug were a total surprise to her. Lou had no idea that Severus had reacted to it as well.
He picked up the cage, took hold of Lou�s arm and they apparated to the green near Grimauld Place.
�Remember everything I have told you Lou. From the moment you enter this house, I am Professor Snape. And do not forget to ask the hat to place you in Ravenclaw.�
�I will, I promise, and Se �Professor?�
�Now what Lou?�

�Thank you, for everything.�
�You are most welcome. Now come on, I have much to do and your Griffindor friends will be eager to see you I am sure.�
Lou wanted to hug him one more time, she also wanted to feel that feeling again that she felt when she hugged him at the manor. But she didn�t dare.
Severus opened the door and helped her inside.
�Oh, and about time too, where have you two been?� Mrs Weasley asked, making her way towards them with her arms outstretched.
�I am not staying Molly, I leave Miss Black to your tender care. Goodnight.�

Putting down the cage, he turned and walked out the door, closing it behind him.
Lou was stunned at the sense of loss she felt, but she also knew that this time, he�d not walked out on her. He would be at her school and she would see him even if she couldn�t talk to him.
�Lou.� Three voices shouted from the stairs.

�We thought you were never coming back.�

�Where did he take you?�

�Are you alright?�

�Why didn�t you write?�

�We�ve missed you.�
They all fired questions at her until Mrs Weasley told them; �Calm down and let the girl breath will you for goodness sake. She�s barely walked in the door and you lot are bombarding her with questions.�

�It�s alright Mrs Weasley, honest. I�ve missed everyone here, I wasn�t sure if you�d all be pleased to see me. Where�s Harry?�
�He�s meeting us at the station in the morning. He had to spend the last week at his aunt and uncles.� Hermione said.
�Of course we�re pleased to see you.� Ron told her. �Aren�t we you lot?�
Lou was thrilled when they all told her yes and she warmed to the welcome. It was the first time she�d had a welcome like this and she felt happy.
�I�ve missed you guys too, there wasn�t anyone else there but me and the Professor. I had to do lessons every day, and I had a bit of trouble with my leg so I was out of it for some of the time. I�m sorry I didn�t write, I wanted to, I just �it was awkward.�
She started to follow Mrs Weasley down the hall and almost lost her balance when her leg decided it wanted to do something other than walk.

She felt someone grab her arms and steady her.
�It looks like you had more than a bit of trouble with that leg Lou, what happened?�
She turned, and was surprised to see Ron Weasley holding her up and looking concerned.
�I got an infection and Professor Snape had to open the wound again. That was the fourth time he�s had to heal it and there were �complications.�
For the next hour she was bombarded with questions about her stay with the Professor. Lou was very cautious how she answered, afraid of giving away secrets she wasn�t supposed to tell. They gang seemed to sense that she was unable to tell them certain things and began telling her about what they�d been doing instead.
Ron was particularly attentive to her and she felt a bit uncomfortable about it. It wasn�t something she was used to and, like with Severus, she didn�t know how she was supposed to react.

TBC
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