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The Nothing I've Become (Areas of Expertise II)	By : SickPuppy Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Snape Views: 18628 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Sorry in the delay in updating, but Lentesco took over! I've got one chapter left after this one, so thanks for staying this far. As usual, there will be author's notes at the end *sighs* when I can be bothered to write them! SP

Chapter Thirty-One - Before I Come Undone

'He's not a traitor!' Harry screamed for about the thousandth time, standing with his arms extended at the foot of Severus' bed to stop the Aurors (who had returned in greater numbers) advancing.

Kingsley Shacklebolt pointed his wand at Harry. 'I could easily move you, Potter.'

'Try it!' Harry retorted, still holding the elder wand.

Severus whispered, 'Harry, violence won't solve this. Let him speak to me.'

Harry turned to look at Severus. 'You sure?'

He received a nod, and so turned back to beckon Kingsley closer. 'He shouldn't be talking,' Harry said, 'so don't make him speak for too long.'

***

An hour later, Harry was allowed back into the hospital ward with Severus in it.

'Ok?' he queried softly.

The older man looked a little grey about the face, but nodded, gasping for breath.

'You pushed too hard!' Harry cried exasperated. 'Honestly, Sev!'

The other nodded, still struggling for breath, but managed to get one hand gripped in Harry's clothes and pulled him close for a kiss.

'Bond with me,' Harry pleaded as he nipped at the other's ear.

Severus sounded genuinely sad as he replied, 'We can't. The Bond has already failed.'

Harry went stiff in his arms. 'Why did it fail? Did you not want me?'

Severus sighed, and then spoke tiredly but sarcastically, 'Yes, of course, you idiot boy, that's the reason the Bond failed, because I didn't want you!' He rolled his eyes, but Harry didn't see it.

Tired as he was, Harry missed the sarcasm.

***

It was two days later that Snape was well enough to receive visitors for any length of time.

'Ok,' Hermione began nervously. She was still a little unsure of some areas of what she was about to say, but had reasoned out most of it, based on her observations of the two men during their time together, and Harry's behaviour whilst he had forgotten his memories.

'According to what 'The Secrets of the Bonding Ceremony' says, your Bond failed, and, as such, cannot be re-attempted. To do so would kill you both. However, that book had some serious errors in it, especially about what Bonding actually is.

'We all thought that a Bond was a Magical Device created through what is, in effect, a ritual, and that if the ritual was interrupted, the Bond wouldn't take. That is simply not the case.' She stopped, taking in Harry's shocked face. He sat on the same bed as Severus, but at the end, rather than being close to him. Snape's one arm reached along his thigh to rest near the hand Harry was leaning on.

'A Bond isn't manufactured by man, it is something that develops through love, through need.' She paused, as though struggling for words. 'An analogy might be a wedding. A wedding means you have the same name and are in the eyes of the world, married, but a marriage only happens when two people work at it. The wedding ceremony doesn't make you a married couple, working at it makes you a married couple.' She glanced around, and saw Severus' nod of comprehension.

'I think Professor Snape and Harry came close to Bonding during last year. Certainly they grew close, and it seemed that love was growing, but the events at the end of the year caused problems.'

Here she took one of Harry's hands in hers. 'Harry,' she said softly, her brown eyes fixed on his, 'I think you forgot everything because you were so in love with Professor Snape. We know that Sapphire's death hurt you, and that, on top of Dumbledore being killed by the man you loved was too much for you. So your mind retreated from what had happened. However, your soul is what connects you to another person, and although that was affected by your amnesia, the link didn't end altogether. Despite everything, I think you still knew you loved Snape. You kept having dreams, and bits of your memory came back. Your brain and your soul needed you to remember Professor Snape. All this time, the Bond was developing. Obviously, I am speculating here, but it is what makes most sense, as I don't believe that the minute you got your memory back, you fell in love with the professor again. I think your soul always remained in love with the professor, and you finally remembered it.'

Harry's green eyes moved from her and flicked instead to the black ones of Severus. Could this be true? Had he remained in love with the other? But what of the Bond itself?

He asked the final question and Hermione chewed her lip before speaking. 'You two are Bonded. You are a couple. The Ceremony was interrupted, so that failed, but, the feeling behind it, THAT is what causes a Bond, and that was real. But, because of how Harry coped with the trauma, it was almost squashed. Almost, but, once created, a Bond remains. Harry may have forgotten everything, but the feeling remained. The Bond remained. And then, Harry got his memories back, and almost at once it became clear that Harry and Severus needed to consummate their Bond.

'The link between you, created by the Bond, enabled you to feel what the other felt. At first neither of you could control it, but I think, with time, you will be able to. Certainly, Professor Snape was able to reach you, and alert you when necessary.' She paused, 'It's an odd situation. In the eyes of the Wizarding World, your Bonding failed, and cannot be attempted again, but, in reality, you are Bonded. Very much so.'

Harry, who has turned his attention back to Hermione when she had begun speaking, now looked at Severus, a tentative, warm smile on his lips. He ran his tongue over them before speaking, 'I guess all of that means you're stuck with me, right?'

He moved closer to the other, feeling the slender digits curl over his hand.

Severus shifted, so that Harry could move to lie alongside him, although uncomfortable with public displays, Harry's touch was too precious to do without. 'I imagine it does indeed mean I am 'stuck', as you so delightfully put it, with you.'

'Git.' Harry said, moving in for a kiss.

Severus' response was almost completely muffled. 'Mmmbrat.'
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The Nothing I've Become (Areas of Expertise II)