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"Why Me?"	By : SpeedyTomato Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male Views: 88152 -:- Recommendations : 4 -:- Currently Reading : 8
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and make no money off this work of extreme insanity.

Chapter List
- 31
- 32
- 33
Beta'd by the amazing Tenchi. Love you, woman, you're the best!

With help from Lynn who works with me when it comes to flow, continuity and other issues.

Just a reminder of what's on my profile; reviews complaining or whinging about the lack 'o sex in stories will get deleted. If you want a smut-filled romp, you need to find another story to read.

Chapter 32:

I Vant To Suck Your Juice!

For Harry, the morning was odd. Rather than coming awake all at once like normal, though being groggy as most were when they came to after sleeping, his senses seemed to come online one at time. That wasn't bad, either. What each of them brought was something pleasurable. There was the way it felt to wake with Sirius, holding him. The smell of his godfather. The soft sounds of the sleeping Sirius, stuff like that. It was all great as far as he was concerned. With all the stresses they had been under, this helped. And it was soothing, something he needed. While he was sure that the day would bring on chaos, at least in some way, starting out in this manner was something he needed, especially after the day before. That was until he shifted around. Then things took a bit of a downward turn, metaphorically that is.
Since the tidal wave of hormones had begun to take over the year before, Harry had rolled with the punches from them. He'd heard enough in the dorms to know that what he was dealing with was normal when it came to so much, hence the reason there were spells for your robes to hide bulges if your traitorous body suddenly decided to sport an erection. That had happened to him more than once for no reason he could tell, so he had become a master at the spell. Then there was the inevitable morning wood for no reason whatsoever. He was used to walking into the bathrooms in the dorm and having to wait to use them while others dealt with the issue, swearing as they did. After that it was the inappropriate thoughts at the most inopportune times. All were just the 'fun' that went along with rampaging hormones. Since this bonding mess started, he hadn't had to deal with most of those, other than when they were brought on by something that would trigger them normally, such as the snogging with Sirius. However, that changed this morning.
Pressing up against Sirius, holding him close, though not so tightly he couldn't breathe or move, Harry kept his eyes shut and just enjoyed it as his godfather started to stir, seeming like he was coming awake. Listening to Sirius grumble like he always did when he woke, snarling about mornings, he grinned. However, as Sirius shifted around and pressed against him more, that grin turned to a look of pure horror when Harry realized that he was sporting a massive erection. Starting to stammer and stutter, hearing Sirius tell him good morning, Harry couldn't handle this.
Not sure what to do, he went with the panic taking over and bailed out of the bed, untangling himself from the blankets as he did, then 'gacked' when they didn't want to let him go. Panicking more, he sputtered and stammered as Sirius, seeming like he was fully awake, asked him what was wrong. “Morning wood!” Harry mumbled, finally getting the blankets from around him then he ran to the loo and planned to stay in there until it vanished.

Lying there, feeling decent for it being right after he woke, Sirius could feel Harry on one side of him and Lucius on the other. Though both had an arm over him, holding him, it wasn't the confining, clinging way that Lucius had done those other nights. This he could deal with. Easily. It felt good, honestly. Something was there that connected and made him feel better than most times when he woke up. While his thought process was still muddled by the waking, he was sure that this meant the bond was pleased with what they were doing.
As he woke more, doing his normal grumblings, he couldn't help but grin just a tad as he felt Harry's morning wood press against his arse. With the size his godson was, it was damned hard to miss as well! As it wasn't Lucius' he was feeling, he didn't mind it as he knew Harry didn't have the lecherous bent that the great pervert did and it was just a normal thing, especially for someone Harry's age. After all, he had woken up plenty of times when he was Harry's age with the same 'growth' problem. It wasn't anything to worry about. Well, until he could tell his poor godson was starting to panic over it.
With how Harry was, that was normal and he expected it. It would take some assurances from him to calm him down slightly. Oh, he wouldn't manage it completely, he knew that, but he could plant the seed for later on so Harry would grow more comfortable. He didn't get the chance to, though.
Just as he was about to say something to Harry and turn over, his godson bailed out of the bed. Unfortunately for the two of them still left in the bed, Harry dragged half the blankets with him. In doing that, Sirius was pulled right along until he fell out of the bed, landing face first on the carpet with his feet still on the bed itself. Sighing heavily at the rug burn now on his face, he tried to peel himself off the carpet and soothe poor Harry, but hearing the door to the loo slam, he realized what happened. Okay, not the way to start the day.
If that wasn't bad enough, Harry's panicked exit from the bed also woke Lucius. Because of the blankets being yanked the way they were and what he was hearing, Lucius was apparently entangled in them, not able get loose. More not the way to start the day.
Though it was a struggle, he managed to get fully out of bed then stand, snagging his wand. Staring at the bed, he gave an amused snort. Lucius was almost completely cocooned in the remaining blankets and struggling to get loose. The more he struggled, the more they seemed to tighten around him. Okay, this was a tad funny and helped to lighten the mood. “Hold still and I'll get you loose,” Sirius told him, snorting softly at the sight.
Panicking and struggling, only slightly coherent at this point, Lucius stammered, not sure what to do to help the situation, “Black! Do something! They're trying to eat me or something equally deranged! They've gone rabid, man!” At this juncture, that was the only thing he could think of for the reason he couldn't get himself loose from them. All he knew was their hold was tightening on him and squeezing, making the panic intensify. He did not need this first thing in the morning.
Pointing his wand at Lucius, he cast the spell to loosen the bedding so the man could escape. In his amused and still slightly groggy state, the spell was a little stronger than he intended as the blankets unwrapped around Lucius so hard and fast, they spun him around before vomiting him out then shooting him onto the floor. Grinning, shoulders shaking, he said, “Sorry. That was a little stronger than I intended.”
Bouncing to his feet, eyes overly wide, Lucius began to smooth down his hair with one hand while snagging his wand with the other. Pointing the wand at the apparently malicious and carnivorous bedding, he began casting spells on it to determine what possessed the innocuous looking linens. Huffing when what he cast came back negative, he shook his head, trying to get coherent. “Do I want to know what's going on? Blankets don't go rabid for no reason!” Blinking owlishly, he glanced around then asked, “Where's Harry? Don't tell me he fell victim to them.”
“He's the reason for the blankets going wonky,” Sirius snorted, grinning. “Give me a few to work with him and get him calmed down. We'll meet you downstairs for breakfast.”
Though not comprehending that, Lucius gave a nod that he hoped Black would take as he understood then huffed before asking, “Do I want to know what's going on?”
“Nothing to worry about. Normal teenage male issues,” Sirius assured him, not wanting to go any further than that. That's when he began to make his way towards the loo to sort this.
“Understood,” Lucius nodded, though he still didn't. If Black knew the problem, he would let him sort it accordingly. Shaking his head, glowering at the blankets, not fully convinced they hadn't attracted a carnivorous pest of some kind, he gave them a poke with his wand to see if they moved. When they didn't, he huffed then trudged off to his own room righting himself after heading in the wrong direction. His first cuppa was in order so he might decipher what was going on. After that, the elves were changing out the blankets to make sure there wasn't a Lethifold infestation in the house. If there was, they would have to stamp it out, quickly.

Leaning against the wall to the loo, Sirius had his arms folded over his chest as he waited for Harry. He had gone to use the loo down the hall, so he was good. All he wanted to do was assure his poor godson not to worry. Looking up when the door creaked open, he saw the sheepish and flushed Harry come out. One glance at him intensified the flush and Harry looked at the floor. Chuckling, he reached out and ruffled Harry's tousled hair. “Nothing to worry about,” he assured his godson.
“Sorry about that,” Harry mumbled, looking at the floor. “I know you didn't like it from Lucius and I would have gotten out of bed sooner if I realized I was sporting the same thing.”
Slipping an arm around Harry's shoulders and pulling him close, Sirius gave him a kiss on the top of his head. “Nothing to worry about. Since you aren't the great pervert he is and a teenager, something that makes such occurrences highly likely, not worried about it.” Giving Harry a squeeze, he chuckled then added, “Just don't panic next time. Meeting the carpet face first in the morning is not the way to start the day. Not to mention that Lucius ended up entangled in the blankets and I'm sure he now has the elves checking all of them in the house for pests as he's convinced they went rabid or something.”
Unable to help himself, Harry grinned at that vision. Shaking his head, he sighed and shrugged, not sure what to say about it.
Stepping in front of Harry, putting both hands on his shoulders, Sirius waited until his sheepish looking godson glanced at him. “Don't worry about it. It's normal. Shite, I spent many days your age dealing with the same damned thing. I'm damned sure everyone in this house did. Nothing like waking up that way then spending the next fifteen minutes bent over the toilet at a forty-five degree angle, swearing, hoping it goes down so you can take a piss. It happens. Even as adults. Don't worry and I won't mind. Just so you don't start to act like Lucius. If you do that, not only am I checking you for the Imperious, but we'll have issues.”
“I don't think there's a chance of that,” Harry chuckled, feeling a bit better.
“I didn't think so,” Sirius snorted then pulled him into a hug. Rubbing his back, he said, “It's normal. Nothing to worry about and I won't object.” Breaking it off, he said, “Let's go down and get something to eat. That and see what insanity awaits us for the day. You know there's something bound to crop up with all that's gone on.” Starting to guide Harry towards the door, he grinned, “That and see how Lucius is handling the 'rabid blankets'. That should be good for a couple chuckles.” Hearing Harry laugh and agree, he moved them along.

Cooing at the two ginger colored creatures he was holding, Tom cackled happily. “Oh, they are adorable aren't they.” He said, letting them loose. Seeing them about to take off, he gave the leashes they were on a gentle tug then admonished, “Oh, no, we won't be doing that, you two. You'll stay right here and behave. I know just what Jarvey mixtures are like and I will not have you causing more havoc than normally goes on around here. No, no, no, an unruly spoiled snake is bad enough. We need no more chaos.” Petting them when they curled back in his lap, squeaking softly, he sighed. “They are most adorable. They are Harry's, you say?”
Remus was about to explain how they were in name only, when he was overridden by Severus, after the man shot him a firm shake of his head. Wondering what was going on, he waited to see what Severus was up to.
“Lucius got them for Potter as a gift,” Severus explained, folding his arms over his chest. He had seen this before with the Dark Lord and knew a damned good chance to get rid of the psychotic beasts when he saw one, so he was going to let it go on.
He gave a wistful sigh as he stroked the creatures fur, loving the adorably cute squeaking noises they made. Tugging the leashes as they made to get down again, he was happy when they curled back up on his lap. “With what you know of Harry, do you think he would give them up? Well, if the motivation was right?” Tom asked, looking between the two, smiling, as the creatures began crawling on him only to perch on his shoulders, peering around. “Of course, you can assure him that I would take ever so good care of them and wouldn't let them cause havoc.” Stopping and looking between the two, he waited. He wanted the creatures, all there was to it. It was just a point of finding out if he could manage, nothing more. There was plenty he could bribe Harry with to get them and would do so. Yes, they would make wonderful mascots for their 'side'.
“I don't know,” Remus said, trying to look like he was pondering it. Now he caught on to what Severus was going for and planned to go with it. Those ferrets out of the house was the best thing that could happen to them all. “He wanted something unique, I think. Not sure there as we weren't in the store when Lucius got them. And he thought they were cute.”
“He likes cute then?” Tom asked, eyes lighting up. Cute he could do! Cute he could easily do! The same with unique. Mind racing over that, he said, “What do you think his stance would be on a rare vampiric Puffskein? It's quite adorable, the reason I bought it. It's black with red tips to its fur. Harmless, of course. All it consumes is the juice it sucks out of tomatoes and makes this eerie humming when it does, making it all the more adorable. They are ever so rare, though. I've had one in my quarters for a dragon's age. I even have the little red silk lined black cape for it. It looks ever so cute in that as it moves around.”
Eyes lighting up, looking smug, Severus glanced at Lupin, who had the same kind of look on his face. He then cleared his throat and said, trying to make his tone sound distracted, “I think that's something we could persuade him to accept. Provided we can assure Black it's not dangerous.”
“Quite harmless,” Tom told him with a flap of his hand. “I even have its little leash, though it's not needed as it just likes to perch on your shoulder, looking all loom-y and eerie. They are quite trainable as well. Harry should have such a fun time doing that.” Knowing that what he wanted was his, he then looked at the two ferrets perched on his shoulders and said, clicking his tongue as he did, “You're going to stay with me. Yes you are! We'll have fun together!”
“We'll take it with us then send an elf with the cages for Gred and Forge when we get home, provided there isn't an issue from Harry,” Remus told him, trying not to grin. Oh, this was perfect, just perfect. No more ferrets!
Squealing as he stood up, Tom clasped his hands together. “Oh, that's most wonderful. Come, we'll get his little cage that's shaped like a castle and pack up all his things. You can take him with you when you go.” Motioning the two to follow, he danced towards his private chambers.
“As for Drama Queen Draco and that unsightly mess—I have the first dose of the potion mostly finished. All I need do is add some fur from Gred and Forge to it. Then you need to let it set for five hours before giving him the first dose. That should get rid of the most bothersome symptoms and Narcissa can take him home. She's already mentioned to me about having made a Draco-sized harness and leash to keep him out of more mischief. I'll send the next couple of doses along to her over the next two days. By the end of this treatment, he should be right as rain. I would, however, caution you to keep him away from poor traumatized Harry. The obsession—it didn't manifest out of the blue,” Tom sighed, tutting softly and shaking his head. “I'll school Narcissa to work with him on a more healthy way to manifest his crushes.”
“And this from a man that does what?” Remus asked Severus, keeping his voice down, trailing along, looking amused. He was, however, pleased to have two problems under control and dealt with.
Snorting, looking amused himself, Severus replied, keeping his voice down, “True. It is something that needs done, though. Narcissa will deal accordingly and take it on.”
Despite the rottenness that had been happening, this was good and Remus was pleased with the resolution of two big problems. Lucius might be upset about the ferrets staying with Tom, but he was sure that they could persuade him this was for the best.

Grinning hugely at the Gothic looking Puffskein as it sucked the juice out of another tomato, humming some kind of tune that sounded faintly like it came from an old horror movie, Harry's shoulders shook. “He's brilliant!” He said with a chuckle. That he meant. He hadn't known that something like this existed and adored it.
Smiling himself as Harry petted the creature when it was done and it began to 'stalk' back and forth across the table, still humming, Remus said, “I do admit that he's cute. Especially with that cape on.”
Looking at Lucius who appeared crest-fallen, though looked amused by the small furry creature, Severus told him, “They'll be fine with the Dark Lord. Besides, they'll have plenty more room to play and won't cause such havoc there. You'll get to see them each time you go.”
“Very true,” Lucius said with a wistful sigh. On the upside, though, Harry appeared quite smitten with the creature he had tagged with the name Vlad. Even Black was grinning at the thing, petting it. “This is probably better for them, yes. They'll have more interaction with various people, thus getting a socialization that they wouldn't here. I'll have the elves deliver their cages and toys to Tom.”
Petting Vlad after Harry perched him on his shoulder and the fuzzball just sat there, still humming, appearing to look around, Sirius grinned, “This is good. Far better, Malfoy. You won't have to worry about keeping a close eye on them anymore.”
“There is that, yes,” Lucius conceded with a nod, eying Vlad.
Petting Vlad, still grinning, Harry then looked at Lucius. He felt a bit bad for him as the man obviously adored the ferrets. “Maybe you could find something else to take their place. Like a cat or something. They're good to have around for plenty of reasons. Plus, some like to just be lap cats and be petted.” Though cats had their own issues about so much, they weren't as likely to cause the havoc the ferrets did, that's for sure! “They're a big help with pests, anyway.” Grinning, he nudged Sirius then joked, “It could get an ego stroke by chasing Padfoot around.”
Chuckling at that image, Sirius got what Harry was going for then said, “We talked about going out tomorrow anyway. We can pop in a few places and let you grab a cat. That I don't object to having around. They're far calmer than ferrets anyway and you won't have to worry about keeping it in a cage. I'll pay for it.” He figured that would do Lucius good. A cat was easier and it was apt to keep Malfoy's ego in check as they were plenty tetchy about many areas.
Smiling, Lucius nodded then said, “We can do just that. I'll find something good that will keep me company.” Focusing on Severus, he asked, “Tom has the potion ready?”
“I have it with me,” Severus assured him. “We have to wait a few hours to give it to him, but it should work. Once he comes around and I check for what the Dark Lord wanted me to, Draco can go home. Narcissa will have to give the next two doses, but that won't be troublesome.”
“Perfect,” Lucius said with a happy nod. “At least he found something.” That was the biggest of the troublesome issues off their plates. Changing topics, he asked Severus, “What do you know about Lethifolds, besides the standard, that is?”
“Nothing beyond what we were taught in Care. Why?” Severus asked, completely confused.
“I think we have one lurking in the house,” Lucius told him with a shudder, shaking his head. “The elves are trying to detect it, but haven't managed to get a bead on the creature yet. Which tells me that we might need to look into spells to see if we can't locate the thing before one of you wakes up to an attempted suffocation like I did this morning.”
“I'm sure we can find something, Lucius,” Severus assured him, wondering where to start. One of those creatures in the house wasn't something they wanted and it needed gone, post haste!
Brow drawn down as he listened to Lucius and Severus, apprehensive about having such a creature in the house, Remus then glanced at Sirius. Seeing his old friend's shoulders shaking and Harry trying to hide a grin, Remus mouthed the word 'what', figuring this would be good.
Shaking his head, unable to stop grinning, Sirius mouthed back 'later', then went on to discuss how to make Vlad's cage eerier and spookier looking with Harry. He and Harry had both tried to convince Lucius that it wasn't a Lethifold that caused the problem, but the man wasn't hearing any of it, absolutely dead set on believing that it was an attack of some kind rather than just getting entangled in the blankets. Oh well, that would keep him occupied. An occupied Lucius was less likely to get up to something then draw them in. That they needed. So, let him go hunting the creature, even if there wasn't one. And Snape could help. That would keep the git from getting on all their nerves. Besides, it would end up right hilarious to watch!
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"Why Me?"