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You Will Not Kiss Me	By : Prosperosdaughter Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Snape/Remus Views: 22836 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
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Chapter List
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Chapter 33: Full Moon Re-Claimed

Snape's mood did not improve all day. He had been disregarded by both his lover and his mentor, and deliberately brought to his knees in pain by a crazed ex-Auror who Snape was convinced had used an Unforgiveable curse on a student and who should be in Azkaban. He was incandescent with the injustice of it all.

It was clear that students knew he was in an even worse temper than usual and they scattered as soon as they laid eyes on his scowling countenance and his classes that day were the best behaved in a long time although that didn't prevent him doling out detentions of the most putrid order that he could think of. He took lunch and dinner in the Hall as a matter of principle to be there for his students, but spoke to no-one. Dumbledore tried to exchange pleasantries with him, but Snape cut short any conversation. He certainly kept well out of the way of Moody.

On retiring to his chambers, he took a bath and did not remove the silencing charm from the mirror nor sit it upright. The humiliation of his lover disbelieving him ran under his skin like scalding water every time he recalled it. He took Dreamless Sleep and went to bed angry and hurt with his back to the bedside table where the mirror lay, to all intents and purposes treating it as if it were Lupin in person.

He fared no better the next day. Dumbledore summoned him to his office to ask after his health. His response was curt.

"Severus," Dumbledore said quietly. "Poppy was unable to tell me the nature of the illness that struck you with such force."

"Really," replied Snape disdainfully.

"Will you enlighten me?" Dumbledore asked lightly.

"I will not," Snape clipped.

"I see," Dumbledore said, his eyes fixed upon Snape's unyielding posture. "Alastor has asked if we can re-convene our discussion about what occurred to Mr. Doyle. When would be a convenient time for you?"

"There is no convenient time, Albus," Snape responded, waspishly. "Moody cast the curse, and that's why neither you nor I could lift it in his presence."

Dumbledore held Snape's dark stare steadily and steepled his long fingers in thought.

"This is the second time you have ranted to me about Alastor ..."

"No, Albus, I am not ranting." Snape cut across Dumbledore. "I am merely telling you that I will not make myself available. The only danger currently in the school is Alastor Moody himself. That you choose to ignore my warnings is a matter for you. Now, if you please Albus, I shall take my leave of you." Snape turned abruptly to leave.

"No Severus," Albus said, his voice deep with command. "You will not. You will tell me why you believe such a thing."

"Would there be a point to such a fruitless exercise?" Snape sneered. "You will dismiss me out of hand, as is your wont."

"I am listening now, Severus," Dumbledore said calmly, but his hands clutched the arms of his chair as he leant forward.

"I believe Moody's sole purpose in casting the Imperius curse on the unfortunate Mr. Doyle was to prevent my leaving your office so I would become ill, in order to cause me pain and distress, and for no other purpose," he said defiantly, his body half turned so that he faced Dumbledore.

Dumbledore sat in silence, the fingers of one hand curling his long beard as he thought.

"Tell me how Alastor would know you would become ill," he asked finally.

"Because it was the full moon, Albus," Snape said wearily, unhappy that he would have to tell Dumbledore the truth of it.

"Full moon," he repeated softly, peering at Snape over his glasses. He stayed silent again. Snape stood stock still. He could play this game too.

"You needed to get to Remus?" Dumbledore asked gently. Snape nodded once.

"I see." There was another lengthy pause. "When did Remus Claim you?"

"Since the spring when Remus was at Hogwarts."

"I must be losing my touch. I missed it," Dumbledore murmured, still peering at Snape.

"Possibly the Thrall threw you," Snape commented drily. Dumbledore nodded.

"Possibly. And how would Alastor know?"

"His magical eye. He's been looking at my neck since he got here." Snape's face was burning with embarrassment now that Dumbledore should know such an intimate fact about him but, even if Dumbledore refused to believe him as Lupin had, Snape would not have it said that he should have told them both at a later date. It was important – he knew it was vital that he didn't let this drop.

Dumbledore steepled his fingers again and regarded Snape for a long time.

"I will speak," he said after some deliberation, "to Alastor. Thank you for your time Severus." Snape nodded, recognising his dismissal, and strode to the door. "And I am pleased for you both," Dumbledore added with the barest of smiles visible through his beard. Snape nodded again, and left, wondering what the upshot of that conversation would be.

The weekend at least meant he had no classes to attend and he resolved to spend the day away from his quarters. He thought he would collect ingredients from the Forbidden Forest as it was a fine early autumn day and it was an exercise that always required him to be alert to his surroundings as he would need to be deep in the Forest where the centaurs and acromantula roamed, so he could not afford to be distracted by thoughts of Lupin. Thereafter, he would brew in his Potions laboratory.

He passed the time of day with Hagrid before entering the Forest with his list of Potion ingredients to be sourced.

Deep in the heart of the forest, a large handsome owl found him. Remarkable creature, thought Snape and recognised it as a Pharoah Eagle-Owl, the type always utilised by Gringotts.

He took the letter, a charmed one from Lupin.

Darling Severus,

Please forgive me. I must have hurt you so deeply for you to refuse to speak to me, look at me or even dream of me.

It was wrong of me to treat you so. I beg your forgiveness, but please don't torture me with your silence. You know how much I need you and love you. Being without you pains me. I cannot bear it.

Talk to me, at least, my Severus. I beg you.

Remus

Snape shook his head as he read it again, heart swelling with love and sadness. Happy to beg for my forgiveness, in no uncertain terms, but doesn't apologise to me, thought Snape bitterly. He was confused and torn as his mind worked this way and that.

He couldn't deny he missed him desperately, but how can I justify the abject lack of trust shown in me? Surely I'd be a fool just to dismiss that!

But the man had loved him like no other; had made him feel as no other; had shown him love and respect as no other. What did this do to that respect?

The man gave him rapture every night; he had learnt how to feel things physically and emotionally he had never known. Was he prepared to give that up? Am I prepared to lie with a man who as good as called me a liar? A man who took the side of an odious, malicious man against me, the man he Claimed as his mate, when I worship him body and soul?

Oh, his own mind was foul and harsh. It would send him back to a hollow life of gnawing solitude, physical loneliness and bitterness in a heart beat. He had to remember that he had hurt Lupin, physically and mentally, on more than one occasion by his own rushing to judgement. He need to justify himself properly to Lupin and then give Lupin the chance to speak and pray desperately they could reconcile.

He had mused upon this for hours as he worked, and once his basket was replete with his list of requirements, he made his way back to the castle, meeting Poppy in the entrance hall.

"Ah, Severus," she smiled briskly, turning to walk with him. "I've been looking for you. Remus has fire-called me to ask if I'd let you know he's called your quarters quite a few times but seems to keep missing you. I told him you'd be busy and I see you have been quite productive." She smiled again at the basket. "Brewing this weekend?"

Snape gave her a tight smile and told her what his brewing diary dictated for this weekend.

"Well, don't let me keep you. But don't forget Remus," and she unexpectedly pressed her hand against his. "Don't leave it too long," she said quietly and meaningfully. He was about to protest until he remembered that she had seen the mirror so would know if Lupin fire-called, Snape was not using his mirror.

"No, Poppy. I won't," he murmured.

Snape started the brewing as planned and took dinner in the Hall then went back to his rooms, resolving to speak to Lupin, wondering if he would be in on a Saturday evening.

He straightened the mirror and removed the silencing charm. "Remus?" he said quietly.

Lupin's face appeared in the mirror, looking drawn.

"Severus! Thank you for speaking to me," Lupin said quickly. "I've been so worried that I couldn't contact you."

"You once said to me that sometimes you need to walk away from a row," Snape said softly, his heart wildly beating to see Lupin, both happy and sad once again.

Lupin nodded and murmured, "I did."

Snape breathed in deeply. "I could not speak to you once you made it clear how you distrust what I tell you. You may well be old friends with Alastor Moody, Remus, but I am your mate – your lover – how could you not believe me?" His voice was low and haunted. "You have talked to me a great deal about trust, Remus," Snape said resentfully, "and how I must trust you. Am I not owed the same respect?"

Lupin looked abashed. "You are, Severus," Lupin said emphatically. "I was wrong not to give you the benefit of the doubt. I have offended you deeply and I am sorry," he paused, watching Snape's reaction. "Please forgive me, Severus," Lupin said earnestly.

"Do you believe me?" Snape asked simply.

"Yes, Severus. I believe you. I was shocked by what you told me: that an old friend of mine, knowing Lycanthropy as well as he does, would prevent a werewolf's mate from being with his mate at full moon was so cruel, so insidious ... I was too shocked to believe you. But I do believe you because you are my partner, my mate, and you would not lie to me, I know," Lupin said firmly.

He drew a further deep breath and looked at Snape directly. "So that leaves us with what is going on. So much about this is wrong to the core, Severus. The way Alastor behaved with Draco, with you, blocking you from getting to me, using an Unforgiveable curse on a student." He thought for some time. "But then, why is Albus unaware? Or why is he turning a blind eye? Is there something more than meets the eye here?" Lupin frowned in concentration. "What do we do?" he said quietly.

"Albus won't listen to me. I have tried to tell him what happened on the full moon, but he doesn't believe me. I don't know what else I can do," Snape said.

"I don't know when I'll be able to come for a visit, but when I do, perhaps I should come and see Alastor. If he's still behaving like this, I can at least lend my voice to support you, Severus." Snape smiled at the gesture of support.

"In the meantime, Severus," Lupin said firmly, "make sure you are far away from him at the next full moon. I can't bear to go through that again without you."

"Nor I, you," Snape whispered. "However, we have an avenging protector in the form of Poppy Pomfrey who has sworn to ensure I make my Portkey every month," Snape smiled and told Lupin of Poppy's care over that night.

"Do you forgive me?" Lupin asked hopefully.

"Yes, Remus, I do," Snape murmured.

"Do you forgive me enough for us to lie down together?"

"If I say no, will you plague me with lewd dreams of the eldest Weasley being debauched with me?" Snape smirked on seeing Lupin smile sheepishly. "What on earth made you do that?"

"I didn't start out with the intention of putting Bill in my dreams to you. I just thought of it towards the end of that first dream and I had thought that you must have found him attractive to have thought I did too so I put him in to turn you on. I felt your very strong reaction against his presence, but that there was something ... just something that was exerting a strong attraction for you."

Snape held up his index finger in thought. "You can read my mind when you influence my dreams?"

"Not as such. It's less definite than that. It more a sense of what you're feeling – of your reactions. Anyway, I admit I was intrigued. The next night, I sent myself to you and I could feel by your reaction that was what you wanted. I'm sorry Severus, I was so intrigued, I brought Bill in again and your reaction this time was mixed. You carried on this time and I knew I was giving you pleasure, but I also realised you weren't entranced by Bill, but his hair. You loved his hair. I felt that very strongly both times."

"I was terribly turned on by you and by you ordering me to take pleasure," Snape gulped hard to be discussing it so frankly, "from you inside me and a mouth on me too. It is the stuff of wild dreams, but, no," he gasped again. "No, I once cared very much for someone with red hair. It has meaning, but not of a sexual nature. The graphic nature of what you wanted me to do. It .. it ... was very disrespectful to that person. That is all I will say on it," Snape said firmly and could see Lupin knew to question it no further. Snape felt his throat constricted with embarrassment and some shame at the memory of touching that red hair, remembering Lily exactly at the moment that Bill offered himself. It turned Snape's stomach with shame.

"I'm sorry Severus, I didn't mean the dreams to upset you. I meant to turn you on, to relax you so you would touch yourself. I suppose that was rather ham-fisted of me. I suppose it's not a discussion we've ever had, whether that would turn you on or not," Lupin said, looked shame-faced.

"They – unnerved me," Snape confessed haltingly. "It's taken me a lot to trust one man the way I trust you. Two in such a situation ... I don't think I could." He looked down at his hands. "I'm sorry if that's what you want..."

"They were only fantasies. Never what I would want to do," Lupin interrupted quickly. "I could never share you Severus. Not ever!" Lupin's face paled. "Oh Severus, I didn't ... remind you of something, did I? Oh Merlin. What a fool I am ..." Lupin's eyes closed and he drew a hand over his face.

"No more of it, Remus. I don't want to discuss it," Snape said quietly, trying to dislodge the memories of the Lestrange brothers that were nudging at his mind. "Nothing would be achieved by it. Suffice it to say, by all means, send me your most truly salacious dreams - but only ever of you. I will willingly accept any of you, if nothing but to be amazed at your astonishing creativity with my body," he grinned.

"I promise, Severus," Lupin said, smiling.

Snape smiled. "Tell me about the retreat in Romania."

So Lupin described the luxury retreat that belonged to Gringotts in the ancient woodland of Romania and of the werewolves and mates he'd met briefly before the full moon.

"It's quite near the Dragon Reserve where Charlie Weasley works," Lupin mentioned in passing.

"Let's not visit Charlie Weasley please, literally or figuratively. I don't want you to think you can earn your place on a chocolate frog card for your twelve uses of an adult Weasley," Snape teased and smirked as Lupin winced in embarrassment.

The lunar month passed relatively quickly. Snape kept his eye on Moody but he seemed, for now, to have tired of Snape as prey. Between classes and his brewing calendar and the final organisation all the teachers had to undertake with the Department of Magical Co-operation for the start of the tournament at the end of this month, his days were full.

His nights were full as he lay with Lupin, albeit two thousand miles apart, and they were as close as they could be. The nights followed the same pattern as the month before as Lupin became more demanding of Snape as the moon waxed.

As they lay looking at each other the night before the October full moon, Lupin said, "There is a choice of two Portkeys for you tomorrow, Severus. There is one at 4.30, if you would like to spend time with me before the transformation. There is one at 6.30, if you prefer."

"Why would I not want to spend time with you, Remus?"

"It will be our first time together for nearly two months." Lupin gazed at Snape intently for a time. "I may not be restrained, especially so near the full moon. I may ..." he swallowed deeply, " ... may be more than demanding ... with my mate ... in the vicinity of other werewolves ... I will not be able to stop .." Lupin clearly struggled.

"Remus," Snape placated, although his stomach flipped excitedly, "I had already gathered as much, just by how we are together. I am your mate and I have no doubt I will be ... ah ... receptive." He flushed as he said this, knowing as with last month, he was greatly looking forward to tomorrow. It spoke to a base instinct of Snape's. Perhaps, the very instinct that marked him as a mate for a werewolf.

Snape arrived first by Portkey. He was shown to their room by a porter. He looked around the room. Gringotts took care of their employees. The room was large and comfortably furnished with a rather opulent bathroom. Large French windows opened onto the forested grounds. There was a tang to the air of the place. He supposed that other werewolves were gathering, some with lupine mates, others human. The pheromones were unmistakeable.

He hung up his travelling cloak and robe and took off his boots and cravat. Lupin hated shoes indoors and encouraged Snape not to wear them when they were together – wants to pad about! Snape snorted. Lupin also hated Snape's cravats. They constituted everything he considered "buttoned up" about Snape. He loved to have access to Snape's neck. At the farmhouse, he hadn't even let Snape unpack them. They were work clothes as far as Lupin was concerned. Hell, Lupin would have him naked all the time if he could. Merlin help him, just that thought sent his desire rocketing through him.

His eyes alighted on a drinks cabinet. He had a small tot of Firewhiskey. He was more than nervous. His stomach turned somersaults waiting for Lupin to arrive. He hadn't been with him for nearly two months and his body was aching for him and as the minutes ticked by, his yearning became less bearable. It went without saying Lupin would be demanding with the moon waxing full but Snape's body was tremulous in anticipation, his adrenaline was starting to pump as if preparing him for what would come shortly.

The wait was over as he heard the door unlock and open and Lupin entered the room, whisking off his cloak and his robe and flinging them to the side as soon as he laid eyes on Snape standing in the middle of the room.

"Severus!" Lupin said lustily as he swept Snape into his arms and kissed him forcefully. "Oh Merlin, Severus, I've missed you," he growled into Snape's neck and carried on kissing him, almost bending him backwards.

There was no doubt in Snape's mind that Lupin seemed larger as if expanded in his chest and arms. He seemed stronger and his scent was almost overwhelming. He pulled Snape's shirt off his body and sucked hard on his neck making Snape's knees weak. He was overpowering Snape in every way just with his presence, his musk, his kiss and embrace.

He pushed Snape onto the bed, his hands deftly removing Snape's trousers so he was quite naked and slightly trembling at the barely contained power Lupin was exuding over him. Lupin sucked and bit at Snape's stomach around his navel and with no ceremony stroked his fingers into Snape, forcing his hips up and making him cry out in shock and pleasure and pain mixed but he craved it and pushed back on to them as Lupin growled his name again. Then Lupin stood, removing his fingers, making Snape whimper at their loss.

"Undress me, Severus," he growled low in his throat, his eyes dark, broody and dilated, moving across Snape's body, his breathing deep, as if scenting Snape. Snape got up, removed Lupin's shirt, then fell to his knees to remove each boot, as Lupin steadied himself on Snape's shoulders, then undid the cord of his trousers to smooth them down Lupin's thighs and off his body. He clasped Lupin's hips and took the head of Lupin's cock in his mouth and then the full length of it greedily, savouring its taste, the act of sucking Lupin driving him mad with desire and need. His body was burning savagely, way beyond normal need. He sucked on Lupin hungrily, his hands grasping Lupin's hips harder and pulling at them to drive into his mouth. Lupin groaned continually deep in his throat, fisted Snape's hair tightly and joined the drive, Snape humming with his own pleasure against Lupin's erection, until Lupin was almost at the brink but then Lupin pulled away.

He went to his knees in front of Snape and pulled him to himself and kissed him bruisingly hard, grabbing both of their erections in one large hand, pumping them hard and very fast together as Snape grasped at Lupin's back. Lupin brought them to orgasm fast to Snape's dismay, until he realised that Lupin had not finished. Indeed no.

"I want to make this last," he growled into Snape's ear. "Turn for me, Severus, and brace yourself against the bed." Snape did so, already another thick hot rock of desire settling in his gut and groin and he started to harden again. Lupin knelt behind him, stroking his butt cheeks hard, almost growling in the base of his throat. Just the sound made Snape's cock weep and twitch and his body flare brighter and harder.

Lupin placed a restraining hand on one of Snape's shoulders as he pushed his fingers in hard into Snape. Snape's thresholds had already risen from Lupin's earlier intrusion and he pushed back onto the fingers, then they pushed in deeper and harder and found his prostate, driving at it to make Snape call out. Even the pace Lupin set with his fingers was punishing and Snape's body was beginning to tremble harder.

Lupin then thrust his cock into Snape in one motion, only stopping very briefly to clamp his mouth over his Claiming bite on Snape's neck, and pull the skin and muscle in, making Snape cry out in desperation at the intensity of it all. At Lupin's first deep thrust, his teeth bit through the skin and muscle and sucked hard, and Snape came hard and uncontrollably, his body shuddering and his arms shaking, his muscles sheathing Lupin contracting and pulsing against him hard.

Lupin sucked on the bite hard as he now thrust deeply and animalistically into Snape, who was delirious on the bite crying out with every thrust driving sharply and scorching into his core, making him compliant and receptive to every punishing thrust, his muscles still contracting causing Lupin to become more desperate and fast, one hand raking into the flesh of Snape's side and stomach. It should have pained him, but all Snape felt was searing pleasure throughout his body as Lupin re-charged the bite more forcefully and Snape became hard once more.

Snape's arms could no longer hold him up, but Lupin's arms, charged and strengthened by the werewolf's debauched and frenzied lust, held the delirious, ecstatic Snape fast as his plunging thrusts became erratic, his grunts deeper and guttural with them, until he roared his orgasm and completed it with a few more brutal thrusts then bit down once more on his bite for Snape to come again.

He held onto Snape's body as they both gasped raggedly for air, taking time to stabilise. Lupin manoeuvred Snape onto the bed. Then, Lupin bent his head to the deep scratches on Snape's body and licked the blood from them, tonguing them to seal them then he enveloped a trembling Snape in his arms, holding him close, stroking and holding his arms firmly but tenderly as he told him how he loved Snape beyond life itself. Snape's body began to settle and calm into a deep and throbbing contentment, although his mind was still unfocused and inarticulate. Each throb in his soreness sent pulses of pure satisfaction and cleansing like a salve over his shredded nerves. He had been rendered completely submissive to Lupin by the magical Claim, and it was everything he had hoped for. His throat was too parched and sore from crying out to tell Lupin he loved him so he kissed the arms that embraced him and Lupin kissed him tenderly and lovingly.

Lupin cleansed the bed, got them some water, and they lay together for an hour. Then Lupin got up and fetched Snape's shirt and trousers and dressed him gently then poured them both a tot of Firewhiskey.

"I'll be transforming soon," he said quietly, as he and Snape held each other. "When I do, I want you to hold me."

Snape propped himself up on one elbow, startled. "But how when your bones are breaking...?"

"Not tightly, but hold your arms around me." Lupin demonstrated. He put his arms around Snape but didn't quite touch his body, as if making a circle around him but moved them as if in a caress. "I spoke to a werewolf and his mate last month, and he told me that this eases the transformation."

"Then we will try it," Snape said.

Lupin settled back onto Snape's chest and they waited, their breathing changing as the atmosphere in the room thickened. Snape felt the pull on his stomach as Lupin rose to his knees away from Snape and began to whimper as he went rigid. Snape got to his knees behind Lupin and held his arms around him with his hands outstretched as Lupin started to shake, his voice rising to a scream as his bones broke and his tendons tore, reforming to his lupine form.

Snape watched, still feeling horror, but less as his close proximity did not allow him to see the full form breaking down and recomposing. He kept his arms in a flowing brace around Lupin until the wolf howled and then sat whining and panting before him. He felt the wolf dig his muzzle into his hand and Snape allowed his arms to close around the wolf's crest and he hugged him and breathed in deeply as the wolf panted.

The wolf turned to face him, panting, nuzzled Snape back and then curled up next to him and placed his head on his lap, to all intents a lap dog. Snape stared in wonder and stroked the wolf's head, looking into Lupin's eyes.

"I know I've got classes tomorrow, but we'll run if you want."

The wolf shook his head, barked, and laid his head back down on Snape's lap.

"Exhausted yourself, have you?" Snape smirked. "Thank Merlin for that," he said softly, as he ached profoundly and all over and really hadn't felt up to even sitting on a broom! Snape curled himself on to the bed and the wolf repositioned himself so that Snape lay behind the wolf's curled up form and they feel to sleep easily.

Snape and the wolf awoke just before the transformation, their bodies readying them. Snape shook himself awake and knelt and the wolf sat looking into Snape's eyes. Snape smiled at him.

"See you soon, Remus," Snape said softly as he felt his stomach start to pull and the wolf began to whine.

They awoke again a couple of hours later, Lupin resting against Snape's chest with Snape's wrapped arms around him, just as he had when Lupin transformed.

"Good morning, Remus," Snape purred and passed Lupin some water to drink.

"Good morning, Severus," Lupin croaked.

"Do you feel any better than usual?" Snape enquired, his eyes running briefly over Lupin's body to confirm what he had already checked when Lupin reverted: that there were no injuries.

"Yes, less tired," he said, and he turned his head and raised his mouth to Snape's chin. "Certainly well enough for your particular ministrations." Snape raised an eyebrow.

"So soon? Don't you ache?" he asked.

"I do. But I wish you to make me ache in a different way. You have to leave me shortly, and I want you to take me first. Get rid of those clothes," Lupin breathed as he pushed gently back on Snape's hardening cock and ran his outspread hand along the length of Snape's thigh as he kissed Snape's chin.

The moon had waxed full last night, and Snape had been Lupin's fully. Today, the moon waned, and this morning, to reward Snape's total trust of the night before, Lupin would be Snape's gladly.
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You Will Not Kiss Me