Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Cracking the Gold	By : Krazy Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 36477 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 33
- 34
- 35
Author's Note:: So I was away house sitting/cat sitting for over a week, and I didn't have the files on me to update. Do I realize that this is probably a long awaited chappie. I apologize!! I've put up absolutely everything I have saved (and it still ends on a cliffy...) in hopes of your approval!! *bows at you* I need my readers!!

Disclaimer:: See Introduction

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Draco sighed then, shaking his head, his own fingers tracing the mark, "It means that I come when he calls, do what's asked of me, or I face the concequences."

Wondering for a moment if perhaps Draco didn't want this, Harry quickly slapped himself mentally. He really did try to look for the good in everything, didn't he? He lowered his head and rested his ear on the blonde's chest, closing his eyes and trying desperately to sort out his thoughts...his feelings. What he was going to do. He knew it would be considered the chicken way out if forgot everything, but he wasn't sure how much more he could handle.

Still shaking a bit from the thoughts soaring through his mind, he didn't know what he was doing. Did he really love Draco? Yes. Did it even matter if he did? Draco couldn't love...could he? No---Death Eaters don't know how to...Merlin I'm an idiot...the only worse thing would be actually falling for....snakeface.

Of course Draco had wanted the mark, there wasn't a way to put it on someone who didn't, at least, not without killing them. He just didn't want to reveal too much for fear of breaking the other man's brain further. Something that he certainly didn't want. He arched a brow slightly at the sudden clinging, just trailing his fingers through his pet's hair.

Lifting his head into the touches for a moment, Harry partially smiled before things over came him again. As much as he wanted to, he knew he couldn't deal with this. He slipped from Draco's lap and grabbed a cloth and slowly began to wash himself. Besides, that was generally the point of bath's right? He kept his eyes low to the water and said nothing, trying to sort things out though he knew it was near hopeless.

Draco arched a brow slightly before tugging the cloth gently from Harry's grasp and going about washing the other man's back himself, deciding that he wanted more contact with Harry's warm skin.

Harry's grip on the cloth hadn't been all that great anyway, but he didn't fight at all, and instead took the time to stare at his reflection in the water as if it would help him sort things out. He tried to push the thoughts of Draco aside, to try to see how he really felt, but the touch to his skin just seemed so real and blissful, it was hard to do. He attempted moving away a few times---only to find he'd settled backwards and closer to Draco's body.

Draco's brow arched at the other man's repeated shifting, but knowing that he wasn't brushing across any injuries he'd caused, he presumed that it was jsut simple restlessness.

Still staring at the ripples, the brunette watched the water dip and rise in a beat that reminded him of pulses. You're weak if you do that.
I know I am...
So why are you doing it? To prove Gryffindor's are weaker than Slytherin?
I doubt that Slytherin has been through what I have.
So you think now that you have it worst off in the world?
I didn't say that.
Yea, you did.
Whatever...I just--I love him, and I know I shouldn't.
Sometimes the best and most famou--
I don't want to be famous!! Havn't you listened to a single thought?!
Of course, I just meant--
I don't care. I give up. I lose. The bloody Dark can win even more.
I can't fight, I can't even love properly...and I can't even deal with myself. If I can't bloody kill myse--
You're right, you can't. Everyone will stop you now that they know the Lord will die if you do---
Yea I got that, shut up alright? If I can't do that, the best thing is to forget, right?
Guess you're going to be spending time in the library then, huh? Doing the same ol research that you and ---
No. I'm not. I want this done. Now. Snape will have a potion. I'll search for him when we're out and I can get away from Draco.
You sure you can't just wait thi---
NO! I want to be normal! I want to love and not regret! I want to be happy and not weighed down by the past! Why should everyone else get the glory of being dead and not remembering when they've had nothing to think about or weigh them down before?! Why should everything STILL rest on me when it's all over?! I. Want. The. Fuck. Out!!!

Harry's teeth were grinding together in anger at his own mind, battling it out. His eyes had closed at the end as he screamed at himself, and when he realized this, he parted them slowly and took a few deep breaths to calm himself. There was no need to get annoyed. If everything went well, he'd be blissfully ignorant in a day's time.

Draco's brow furrowed just slightly at the sudden tension, the sound of the teeth grinding. He tilted his head, fingers petting gently down Harry's side, "Something the matter Harry?"

Taking a deep breath, Harry shook his head. "No...no I'm alright...I think...I think I just need a bit of fresh air later....after. A walk. I...I need to clear my head...." He was still trying to calm his breathing down a bit and he sunk beneath the surface slowly, tilted his head back, and rose out again so that his hair seemed to be imitating Draco's early 'look at me! I'm slicked back!' hair styles.

Draco nodded, head tilting just slightly as he ran his fingers through the other's hair, "Alright. You're welcome to go alone if you like." He said, giving the pendant on the collar a flick, "Not like anyone's going to bother you."

Trying not to let his eyes flutter, he smiled lightly, nodding. "Thanks...I think I will. I just...need to sort through some things my mind doesn't agree on..." He felt horrible and ill and angry all at once and he hated it. Besides the fact everything but his mind was screaming at him for being out of Draco's grasp and touches and doubting his love to the blonde, while his mind was battling everything else back into the darkness. He chanced a weak smile as the tag was flicked, and he felt a bit more comfortable at that.

Excusing himself, he muttered something about raisins and prunes and slipped from the bath, grabbing a towel and pulling it around himself. His mind was in a dazed state, and he next found himself in the bedroom, trying to open the drawers. However, they were still zapping him and he found himself yet again thinking that only Draco and the elves could go into them. So, with a sigh, Harry stood in the room, wondering what the Merlin he was going to wear. He didn't want to put n the same clothes he'd had on previously, not after just cleaning himself--or being cleaned, rather.

He did what he could to avoid looking at the bed, because when he did once, he felt his heart pulsing behind his eyes, then slowly pounding away at his throat. He had to swallow it down. It wasn't that he didn't want to remember the action and the bliss--he was just afraid it would take his mind off course right then.

There were clothes laid out for him on the foot of the bed, houselves were industrious little things. It didn't matter if he'd been dressed in something fresh that morning, if there was a bath, that meant new clothes.

Noticing them finally, Harry scooped them up and dropped the towel to change into them. He'd gotten used to the no underwear thing, as annoying as it had been at first. It half seemed normal now. Slipping all the garments on, Harry folded the towel and placed it on the bed, then slipped from the room, then looked side to side in wonder of which way to go first.

The outfit was simple enough for once, another of the long-sleeved shirts with the high collars that Draco seemed to fancy on him so much. Brushed silk pyjamma-style pants with wide cuffs, all in a sort of deep midnight blue, dusted with glitter across the shoulders and hems.

Harry smiled a bit at the bits of glitter, having not thought Draco one for that, but shrugged, and then headed off down a hallway to his right, which he believed would head him in the right direction to see his Potions Professor.

The lay of the castle hadn't changed much since it had been the school, not much at all really, though rooms previously blocked off were opened, other rooms added, but nothing had been taken away, just built on and added to.

Wandering around for a while, Harry finally convinced himself to make his way to the Dungeons. Biting his lip as he headed down the stairs, he hated how different the school he'd called home now was. It was eerie, and he felt like his hair was standing on end everywhere now. Of course, aside from the recently made bare area...

Raising his hand, Harry hesitated, then knocked on the Potions door firmly, assuming that Snape would still be down here even though it was no longer a school.

Well of course he was, troglodyte that he was, he had gone a bit queer, spending so much time down in the dank dark cold with his potions, hissed when he went out into the sunlight now.

He huffed at the interruption, as it was unscheduled and nearly made him over-measure the goat's bile he was pouring ever so carefully into a bubbling cauldron, "Enter!" Apparently he wasn't any more good natured now than he had been as a teacher.

Slowly cracking the door open, Harry was afraid that this wouldn't go well. "Professor Snape...?" Swallowing a bit nervously, he found his fingers toying with the loose tag as he stepped in, carefully eyeing the classroom which was no longer a classroom. It still was overflowing with Potion trinkets as always though.

Severus' brow arched slowly at that, an equally slow smile spreading across his face, "Ah. Potter. And to what do I owe this... singular pleasure?"

Trying to hold his ground strongly--'cause that works so well when toying with a necklace--Harry met his old Professor's eyes. "I came for your assistance," he stated adding a quick "sir" onto the end from remembering how a few times that had kept him out of trouble in classes by simply remembering to say that. Not often mind you.

Severus' brow remained arched, "Oh? Have you?" His smile was decidely predatory then, moving the cauldron away from the flame, "And what is it that I can help the pet of a Malfoy with?"

Harry hand dropped from the collar. He didn't like how that was spoken. Then again, he rarely liked what anything the git had to say. No one called him that. Except Draco, right? Oh hush. "First of all, I'm still a person whether you like it or not. Just because I couldn't live up to everything and got caught and handed off doesn't mean I'm anything less than what I was." Yes, he was rather angry, though trying to conceal it as it wouldn't help him get what he wanted from Snape to be angry.

Taking a breath, he calmed himself. "I was wondering what kind of memory potions or draughts you had, and whether I'd be able to get one from you..."

Severus' brow arched slowly at that, leaning back against his worktable, ankles crossed, looking rather like some overlarge spider, watching an insect struggling in a corner of its web, "Oh? And what would you want one of those for Potter?"

Harry fought the urge to scream at him and tell him to just hand over a bloody potion. "Why else would one want a memory potion sir?" He paused and thought for a second,it dawning on him that perhaps Snape thought he wanted it to give to Draco. Far from it. "I want to use it. On me. No one else. Me." He realized that sounded incredibly selfish, but oh well.

Severus' head tilted slightly, still studying the younger man intently, "I see. Tired of the high life already are you?" His smile returned, brow arching once more, "Come to continue our ... earlier discussion?"

Taking only a moment to realize what Snape meant, Harry swallowed, realizing this may not have beent he best of choices, but really--it was his only one. "Yes, I'm tired of everything and I just want select memories. No. I am not here to continue that. The only reason I didn't do anything was because I was completely unfit to do so." His eyes narrowed at the Professor for even suggesting he might come for that. "I'd appreciate if that wasn't brought up again, thank you," he gritted out, trying to stay nice so he'd be able to get a potion. Hopefully a potion where he could choose what he remembered, and not some random one Severus just handed him to make him completely bonkers like Lockhart.

Severus shook hsi head, "It can't be done. The human mind isn't like a library where we can choose what books to burn. Far more complicated than that, it's an all or nothing affair." His smile returned, "And something for nothing isn't how it works Potter."

His eyes narrowed. "Draco said it could be done. You're the Potions Master. Don't lie to me." It had to be done. It had to be possible. Had to. The brunette fought the trembles that were threatening his body with anger and fear that it wouldn't work, that he'd have to live with the horrible memories.

Severus shook his head, "Picking what memories get erased is what can't be done. Memory potions are like that, just the same as memory charms." He sighed heavily, "It's remove everything, remove things at random, or dim everything. All or nothing Potter, now, if you've something you want, get on with it, otherwise get out."

Harry's mind raced. He didn't know what to do. His eyes darted back and forth, mind spinning, but he knew he had to say something fast, or else he'd get nothing. But---what? He swallowed, staring at the floor, eyes flicking back and forth, wondering if he could chance the random. Not sure what the dim meant, and afraid that if he chose all...he'd forget even his feelings to Draco. His lips moved silently as he tried to weigh things out, hand back at toying with the tag, rubbing one side with his thumb as if it was a luck charm.

Harry looked up slowly. "But, the Auror's... they always replace the muggle's memories when they see something. They rid that event, so why is it not possible to do on a mass scale?"

He shook his head, "Recent memory is something else, easier to change. And that's not all memory either, just one little patch of it, fresh in the mind." He sounded bored, "Now, again, do you want something?"

Harry looked at Snape then, stopping chewing on his lip finally. "Yea, I do. But I don't know which. I'll be back." And with that, he turned and headed to find some fresh air, even if it was merely a cracked window. He needed to think, to panic, to sort things out.

Severus chuckled as the young man vanished again, shaking his head and going back to his potion. He'd get his hooks into the brunette yet.

Finally finding a corridor that was fairly dark--like my situation--and had a cracked open window, Harry slumped down the wall, burying his face in his hands. He didn't know what to do. He wanted to be back with Draco, ask him, but would he care? Probably not. He'd likely simply wave Harry off and say 'whatever' and leave him in the same situation he was right then. So he might as well skip all that and sit where he was.

Then again, the whole idea of this was to do this on his own, to free himself from himself and the world, and let himself fall completely for the blonde. To return to him and happily do as he was expected to, whatever that might be. He'd had his time to lead people, and all he'd done was lead them to their death. He didn't want to remember that, and he was sick of leading. With Draco, he felt natural and normal, as odd as that would seem.

He buried his face in his hands. Could he chance to forget it all? Could he get the same relationship with Draco back? Would Draco think he chose to forget it all because...because he wanted to forget Draco? No...that couldn't be.

Could he risk random? Could he be lucky and remember only his childhood, parts of Hogwarts that wouldn't remind him who he was supposed to be, and could he risk forgetting that moment earlier that day? No...he wanted to keep that, but could he? If he went with random, wouldn't it be as possible for him to only remeber the bad times with Draco, and...and the Lord? He remembered how stressed out Draco looked the other day when Harry had thought his nightmare real. He didn't want to see Draco like that again.

"Fuck..." His head smacked backwards into the brick wall behind him. What am I doing?

Severus went back to the potion he was working on, as it was overdue, but these things took time, and the aching of his own Mark wasn't doing much to make him hurry, only serving to annoy him.

At that particular moment, Draco realized just how long Harry had been gone and was debating going looking for him, just in case.

Then there was the option of dimming, whatever that meant. He needed information... He crept his way to the library, barely noticing that he was moving through the halls as he moved along. His thoughts were swirling, and he'd come close to crying a few times, but harshly shoved the tears away. Stepping into the transformed library, he looked around, then immediately slipped into where the Restricted Section used to be. Squinting in the candle light, he searched for any books that might help him.

After a while, Harry had made it to the other side of the large library before finding any Potions books. Finally dragging mass amounts of them out, he searched each one frantically, desperate to find something that Snape didn't know, something that would help him. Really help him. If I can just find the potion, the effects, and how it's made...I can give it to him... Jaw set in determination, he tossed a book in front of him and flipped it open.

He searched about thirteen books before finding one that even mentioned memory potions. In that time, he wondered if perhaps there was only all or nothing in potions but whether there was more of a chance with spells, or charms...

It wasn't likely, though there was a chance. Though, did he really have that much time to spend doing research? It was quite possible that Draco was searching for him already, considering how long he'd been gone.

Sighing in frustration, Harry slammed the last book shut that he felt like going through. He had many more he could try, but he was sick of this already. Stalking out of the library, his mind raced for an idea. He had to get something, anything, done--and he told Snape he'd be back...so he needed an answer. Passing a bird bath, he stopped by it, and hung his head, staring at the rippling water. Taking a drink from it with his hands cautiously, he froze.

He knew what to do. Turning around quickly, he searched the area for people near by, then called out quietly, "Cookie?"

There was a long moment with no response, but finally she popped up, wringing her hands in the hem of her tea towel, "Yes misterharrypottersir?"

Smiling, Harry knelt down to her level. "I want to ask you two things, alright?" He smiled, hoping greatly that she could help him. If she could, then all was well, if not--he had no more options that he could think of. "Firstly, please call me only Harry from now on. I don't want to think about my last name anymore," And I hope after all this everyone only talks of Potter the "savior" and not string them together... "Secondly, do you know if I can get a penseive from anywhere? I'd like to store a few memories for a while." Smiling gently at her, his heart was pounding and praying she'd know. "Also, a few bottles to store them in if possible." He didn't want the chance of somepne emptying the penseive and him really losing all his memories; quite literally.

She blinked twice then twice again, quite clear that the gears in her head were turning. Dumbledore had had one, which meant it was still in the castle somewhere, and the houselves would be the ones to know where, unless they'd been ordered to forget, "Cookie... might know where to find one misterharrypot....harrysir."

Harry's eyes lit up a bit. "Can you tell me Cookie? Or can you get it for me? I'd greatly appreciate it...soo much. I understand if yuo are unable to, but..." trailing off, he didn't want to think about the possibility of this failing. He looked to the small house elf hopefully, fingers toying with his tag.

She was gnawing on the end of an ear, attempting to stuff it into her mouth. Finally she vanished with a squeak.

Blinking, Harry hoped that this was a good sign, and she hadn't disappeared to punish herself as he knew Dobby would have. He sat down on a bench nearby, hoping that she would come back with the penseive. Now he set to work on where he'd possibly stow this... I wonder if the Room of Requirement is still accessable...

She returned not long after, perhaps five minutes, taking Harry's hand and tugging hm along, "Come along misterharry sir, it won't be there much longer."

Standing at the first tug, Harry followed the small elf quickly, slight panic hitting him at the 'won't be there much longer'. What was going to happen to it? Where was it going? Who was going to take it away?

Cookie led him on, weaving down the halls, right to the birdbath he'd passed earlier, "Here it is misterharrysir. It's un... unpotted, it moves and no one can find it."

Harry almost laughed. "This is it? Unplotted...? I haven't heard that was possible. Thank you so much Cookie!" He hugged her gently and patted her head, smiling. "I want to ask a couple more things...I'm planning on erasing my memory..." he paused for her reaction. "That means that I need to be able to find these memories later to retrieve them. Will they stay in the penseive until I retreive them? And will you be able to help me find it again once my memory's gone? I plan on needing them again tomorrow morning, at the latest..." He hoped she understood him. Hoped a lot.

She was chewing her ear again, finally holding up a small pillowcase that clattered faintly, it was filled with glass vials and bottles of various sizes.

Slightly worried, Harry took the case from her and knelt. "Will you help me find these bottles tomorrow? It's very important to me Cookie, especially since I'm keeping a memory of you and your overly delicious cheesecakes." He smiled, trying to pull her ear from her mouth so she wouldn't hurt herself.

She kept tight hold of the ear, but nodded, speaking around her mouthful. It was muffled, and slurred and only vaguely understandable as 'I'll keep them safe myself masterharrysir.'

Harry smiled, leaning down and gently pulling her ear from her mouth. "Thank you Cookie. It means a lot to me." Nodding once, he turned to sit down on the nearby bench and dug out a qquill and piece of parchment that he'd stowed in his pocket from SNape's office before he'd turned around.

Cookie shifted nervously from foot to foot, gnawing at the collar of her teatowel shift, not really sure what else to do with herself at the moment.

Harry nodded, once in thought, then looked back at her. "You should probably get back to your duties. I don't want to get you into trouble." Smiling at her, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes, swallowing nervously. He knew Draco would begin to look for him soon, but he wasn't sure when. He knew a lot of time had passed--more than he had expected he'd need. And now he had to figure out how he was going to---

He cursed. I need a wand...I don't have a wand.

She nodded, giving him a quick, impulsive hug before vanishing with a faint pop.

Draco hadn't started looking just yet, though he was gathering himself to do so, he'd check with Severus first... no, MacNair, he was closer and would have gotten ahold of Harry first. Probably.

Upon the realization that he didn't have a wand and that everything he'd just worked on planning out was going to pieces, Harry panicked. He begun pacing. In a metter of moments he was beginning to sweat and almost tear up because he didn't want to remember--and he'd gotten so happy that he was going to be able to live normally for once. And now; now it was all being smashed in his face. Just like every plan that he'd ever tried and failed. He began to wring his hands, then pull at his hair in desperation as his gaze remained fixed on the pensieve.

After a minute, he was nearly hyperventinating in desperation to make this work. He was trying to summon his wand, and he could feel his magic crackling a bit, and growing faintly, but he had the sinking feeling that they had destroyed his wand and not simply locked it up. Pulling at his hair, a tear fell free and dropped into the pensieve. Ready to scream, his hands pulled from his head and tohis shock, there laid long silver strands that shimmered, waiting to be put somewhere.

Harry froze. Had he just done wandless to pull memories? He hadn't known that was possible. He tossed the memory aside. He didn't know what that one was, but he was near positive he wouldn't need it. Glimmer of hope wavered inside him and he concentrated hard to think of what memory he wanted to pull, exactly what moments he wanted and he gripped a glass vial tightly. Pulling his hand free of his hair again, he grinned to see another silver, mercury like strand hanging from his clenched fingers.

Lowering it into the vial carefully, Harry bit his lip. This was seeming too easy, but he'd take it as it came. Focusing on marking the eight vials in the bag and the one in his hand with numbers, he sat on the bench, unrolled the parchment and laid the quill ontop of it. Then he placed the vials in order by number along a short wall dividing the hall and the court yard.

Taking a deep breath, Harry placed his right hand over the quill much like he had done in year one when first learning to get his broom to fly. It trembled a bit, but he was confident in himself now that he'd done a bit of wandless. Muttering a few words in which he was unsure where he had learned them from, the quill twitched, then slowly began to hover, then right itself and poised itself ready to write. A dictation spell.

Testing it, he spoke the beginning of the letter he knew he had to write. One word...name. "Draco, ---" He watched as the quill etched it ontot he paper and smiled.

Now, he could feel the strength threatening to drain from him because he was working too hard, but he didn't care. He slowly began speaking out his letter to Draco, going off on random thoughts occasionally, and here and there pulling a silver strand from his head and putting it into the appropriate vial until all were full. All nine.

Harry then managed to spend another hour, at least, speaking and occasionally mumbling words for the quill to copy down. Here and there the magic would crackle and he'd be forced to continue his thought by hand until the magic came back in his desperation.

Once he'd signed his name, everything around him crackled and fell. Including himself. He collapsed to the ground, shaking and weak. His hair was a mess from running his fingers through it and working on pulling the memories. A few times he had to try twice because he'd grabbed the wrong one because his mind strayed in the weakened state. His eyes felt bloodshot, and he felt like he was going to pass out, but he was determined to continue until he was safe back with Draco.

Whistling quietly, Harry tried to call an owl, and was surprised when one actually came. He smiled a bit when he noticed that it was Pig. He felt saddened now with the memory of Hedwig, and wondered where she was--whether she was even alive. Swallowing a bit, he struggled to tie the now rolled parchment onto the owl's leg. "Pig...I want you to wait before you deliver this, alright? Wait at least ten minutes before taking this to Draco. Understand?" When the owl nipped at him, hooting quietly, Harry nodded and released him. He glanced around weakly, slumping onto the bench again, breathing heavily. "C...Cook-kie?" He needed her to take the vials now...then he needed to find Snape again.

She appeared again with a pop, she'd likely just been waiting out of sight until he called her again, "yes masterharrysir?"

Swallowing and blinking his eyes open which had fallen dangerously shut, he pointed tot he bottles with as much strength as he could manage. "P...please take...take them t-to...to the suit of armor on the third...floor. West wing... I don't want you to be in trouble Cookie, if Draco gets angry at me. So please...just...l-leave them in the armor. It's...where I told Draco they would...be." Harry hated ohw hard it was to speak, how much effort.

She nodded, chewing her ear again and gathering them back into the pillowcase, worried now, and more than she had been before, her response muffled as she vanished once more.

Harry was too tired to worry about her now, so he simply struggled to his feet and stumbled his way throught he castle to the Dungeon steps. Tears had spilled from his eyes in exhaustion and desperation. Not to mentiont he letter. It had dawned on him near the beginning that those would be...the last words of Harry Potter. It scared him. However, not enough to make him stop descending those steps. He had the quill to return.

Knocking on the door weakly, as well as collapsing against it, Harry's eyes dared to close and didn't open for a few moments. He simply prayed that Snape would be there.

Well of course he was, where else would he be. The door swung itself open slowly on silent hinges. Severus was finished with whatever potion he'd been working on previously. He smiled from his seat, fingers steepled, "Come back I see."

Having been leaning against the frame of the door, Harry practically fell into the room, too tired and weak to cry out or grab for anything. Catching his balance somehow, he leaned on a desk for now. "Y..yes..." He wiped the tears that he just realized were on his face away. "I want...that potion..." He had been nearly about to say please, but then realized that some of his last spoken words would be pleading Snape, and he didn't want that.

Severus smiled slowly, gesturing to the chair opposite his own, "And just which one would that be? I believe we discussed a few of them."

Shaking his head to the chair offer, Harry remained put. He didn't want to get cosy and lose himself to the blackness that wanted to take him. He wanted the potion, then to find Draco, relive his memories, then fall asleep in his arms---or at least near him. "The full..." he muttered, half hating to admit he wanted that one, half not wanting to even speak because it took so much work.

Severus' smile was snakelike and smug, "I see. Well that, Harry, is going to cost you."

Swallowing took effort, but he managed to. He swayed a bit, but clasped onto a nearby desk with both hands, trying not to fall. "I'm giving my Gringott's key...t-to Draco. Take whatever you want when he gets into...my vault. I...don't need it..." he rasped out quietly. He really didn't want to beg.

Severus chuckled then, shaking his head, "I never said it was going to cost you gold Harry. I've enough of that myself."

Shaking his head, Harry wasn't focused to think straight. "What...whatever...just give me...the bloody potion..." he panted, swaying dangerously close to falling over. His head was now bowed and his fingers were clutching at the table so hard they were white knuckled.

Severus' brow arched slowly, an entirely predatory smile easing across his face, "Did you say... 'whatever'?" He asked cooly. Perhaps this was going to be easier than he'd thought.

Harry was weak and he wasn't in his right mind. "Y...yea I...I did...b-but I....I take that b-back now...just...just give....hand it over...Professor..." He was fighting not to fall over ontot he floor. His vision seemed to be swimming already and his eyes closed as he worked on calculating his breathing, trying to keep it steady and not panicked like it wanted to be.

Severus tutted as he unfolded from his seat to circle around the desk, draping himself along Harry's spine, arms bracketing the younger man's against the desk, voice a warm rumble against his ear, "you can hardly stand Harry, I doubt there'd be any resistance to my exacting whatever payment I wish."

Teeth clenched as his knuckles tightened against the desk again. "Give...me the potion Snape...please..." Damnit. He'd begged. Sort of. His eyes clenched shut as the weight against him seemed tenfold and his arms almost collapsed. He tried to push back, but his arms simply shook in protest. "S...stop it..." He attempted to point out the collar, what it meant. Maybe Snape simply didn't know.

His voice was still a warm, lazy murmur against Harry's ear, hardly leaning against him at all now, mostly supporting him really, "I told you from the start Harry, nothing is free."

Unable to supress it, Harry gagged at the words and warmth against his ear. Trying to find what strength he had left, he pushed on his arms, shoving Snape back as he attempted to growl in annoyance. "Do...don't even...think about it Snape... I...I'm collared... D...Malfoy will kill you..." I hope...

Severus chuckled, bearing down on the younger man again, pinning him against the edge of the desk, "Doubtful Potter, very doubtful. He's still below me on the food chain, if only barely, and he knows that nothing comes free."

Uttering a quiet gasp as the corner of the desk dug into his stomach, he fought to push back, but his arms shook and quickly collapsed. His forehead pressed against the cool surface and he closed his eyes, trying to stop everything from spinning. His breathing became desperate and panicked when he thought that this wouldn't go as planned. Maybe he could just get the potion, then...the payment after, but by then Draco would come find him... The owl should be reaching him shortly...

Severus' brow arched just slightly as he ground his hips forward against Harry's suddenly, smile slow and predatory once more, "Well?"

In fact, it was beaking at his fingers right then, attempting to get at the treat Draco was holding hostage while he got the letter untied, brow furrowed. The owl had very nearly collided with his head when he'd opened the door on his way to go find Harry.

Harry whimpered quietly, fingers curling against the desk as he fought to push away, to push back and get away. He'd ask Draco to get the potion. He didn't need to do this. "F...f_forget it. I...I don't...n_need it..." he croaked.

Draco,

By the time you're reading this__I probably won't remember who you are, and I regret that. More than I can say. I was hoping that I'd be able to find a potion, or spell, or draught that would allow me to select all the memories I wished to retain, the ones I wished to blur, and then the ones to rid of completely. However, upon talking to Snape, and flipping through the library...this isn't possible.

I believe I said it before, but not openly. I love you Draco, and I regret this choice to void my brain of you only because of that. I don't want you to be angry with me, but I don't expect you to be happily overjoyed that I did this behind your back either. I simply hope that you will care for me as you have, and not turn me away to someone else.

If you go down the hall towards the previous DADA room, there is a suit of armor there. Please...please go to it and retrieve the bottles within. Those are the memories I wish to keep. I bottled them, and I'll need to grab a penseive at some point later to experience and therefor remember them again. I pray that this will work, and if not, I'm horrendously sorry.

I found only nine bottles, so I could only keep nine memories. In case this fails, I want you to know what I hope to remember.

Severus chuckled once more, nipping at Harry's ear, teeth almost too sharp, "Oh it's too late now Potter, you've already told me what you need, and what you'll give me for it." His smile was deadly all on its own, "Don't you remember?"

Draco's brow furrowed as he started reading, sagging into the nearest chair as it went on.

"N...no...I...I didn't..." Harry seethed, twisting hish ead away from the teeth, wanting badly to gag and throw up. His eyes remained closed as he fought to keep everything from spinning.

One--I'm keeping the first year feast, from after your offer of friendship (I don't want to remember that you, because I don't want to hate you when I see these--I want to still love you) to the hat saying which house I was in. Did you know I was going to be in Slytherin? I begged the hat not to put me there because I didn't want to be with "that prat". I wonder how differently things would have been...

Two-- I'm keeping the Quidditch match from year three where the Dementor's entered the grounds and I feel from my broom. This is important to me because; obviously; I love...loved Quidditch. Also, I want to remember what they did to me and how uncontrollable they can be.

Three-- I created a single memory on the TriWizard Tournament, but all three events blurred together as the last two events everyone went at once and I don't have a 'observer' view on it. So It is blurred and hopefully enough that I won't be able to tell that I was in it. I want to remember those events simply because it was one of my greatest accomplishments, especially since I wasn't of age, and they were interesting. As well as the fact that they'll probably never be played again.

Four-- I used this one for the memory of the war, in a simple matter. This is the memory of how I chickened and ran to hide. Perhaps then I won't believe myself to be a hero when I have a memory of myself hiding. It stops before anyone caught me, so I shouldn't question why they caught me of all people laying beyond the castle doors that they simply killed.

Severus was still grinning, nibbling at Harry's ear still, arms bracketing him in tightly against the edge of the desk, "I'm quite certain you did Potter."

Draco blinked, and again, his hands weren't shaking, no, he was too well bred and well trained for something like that, but they would have been, if he weren't.

Harry growled, or he tried to, as he pushed back against Snape. "L...let me go...I...I don't want the potion right now anyway..." He was feeling weaker and weaker, everything hurt from the magic that he'd managed to pour out. But he still fought.

Five-- The next memory I have is...well the next ones are of us, in hopes that I remember how much I love you. This one is a combined one of the moments before ... before my rape which I sucked you off. Then blurring into the room where you returned such. I want to remember that I've done such with you, and that...well that it was awesome. I never told you, but half the reason I cut myself so badly was because I refused to admit that I liked you. Despite my body *obviously* saying otherwise. I was so scared, and I made myself near sick a few times thinking about how 'wrong' it was. How horrible I was for enjoying what you were doing to me, and the few things I returned. I apologize for that by the way. I hope to return a lot more to you later, I really do. I just lost it--hell I'm glad I still have something to show my appreciation with because I damn near severed it off that night. Thank you again for that--healing me I mean.

Six-- Another. The room, the first time. I remember you said we'd be going through every one of them. "One. At. A. Time." If I do so remember correctly. "You'll learn to love them, or you'll constantly hate them and this will be what finally breaks the Boy Who Lived." I blurred that little bit of the memory, those three words---but I expect you to keep that promise. Merlin...I don't remember what you used on me that day...that...ring I suppose it was, but it was bloody brilliant.

Seven-- The rape. I need to remember that. I don't know why, I just...need to. I think a lot of it has to do with how you helped me after, caring almost. I blurred out Ron. I just--can't think of him anymore. I can't know I know him. Everyone from my past is just...gone.

Eight-- This is the glorious memory of early today. First the room, then the bedroom...the bath... Have I mentioned how much I love you? I don't think so... But, I definitely don't want to forget today. Ever. I debated switching these memories around, so that I'll believe that you were my first, but that's not right, and I'm sure it'll play some importance later that I know it.

Nine-- This is a memory that's more recent than the last. Once I had all the others done, I sat and I simply talked out_loud about Cookie and her desserts and her cheesecake (make me love cheesecake again if I don't...please?) and who she was and how she helps me with clothes when need be, then I admitted how I want to make you happier than ever for what you've given me. I hope I can do this for you Draco. I really do.

The struggling however, only seemed to spur Severus on, "Oh? Don't you?" His voice was a warm murmur against Harry's ear, "you seemed quite desperate for it a short while ago."

Draco's hands were shaking then, this was... this was just... not how things were supposed to turn out.

Harry's eyes clenched harder shut. "N...no..." It seemed hee was more trying to convince himself now. This wouldn't happen aagain...he didn't want to feel that pain again...not so soon after realizing how perfect it could feel.

I was going to talk out--loud about putting these memories together and then writing this note to you; as a memory; but then I realized that I'd want to know why I wanted to erase my memory, and...I couldn't...couldn't have that.

I would like you to get the memories for me, please. I've put them in the suit of armor on the third floor, west wing. If they aren't there�then check the pensieve that's unplotted. They might be in there, traveling around with it. One way or another, I want you to find them for me, since I won't remember where they are.

I...I'm weak now. I'm not sure how I managed to do wandless, but I suppose I only had enough to get the memories out. I'm exhausted now...yet I'm still desperate enough to save my energy and get this quill to write for me. I'm in no state to write right now. Since these are going to be Harry fucking Potter's last words, I feel I need to make them count, to get things out I don't know whether they were ever out before.

You, and everyone around me always thought I was high and mighty, or that what 'I thought' apparently. That I was treated as a king at home with my muggle family. I wish it had been so, but no. I didn't even know until my birthday of the year I started Hogwarts that my parents were killed in anything but a car crash. Me? Simply a lucky survivor of stray shards of glass.

Severus smirked once more, nibbling at the shell of Harry's ear still, this wasn't going to be force, oh no, coercion was different than force.

Draco had to set the letter down then for fear of tearing it his hands were shaking so badly. He shook himself, raked his hands through his hair and picked the letter up again.

Harry wanted to whimper again, but everything was spinning so much that he didn't have the ability to. Everything was disjointed and he couldn't even say he was positive that his body was still in tact. He simply clenched his eyes and hoped for it to all go away.

I was placed on my Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon's care. However, my Aunt--my mothers sister--hated my mom. Hated anything that was "that" way. My cousin, Dudley, was a spoiled prat. More so than you I believe. He had his parents scared of him I think, and they constantly gave in to him. "I have less presents than last year...I want the snake to move...give me this...bake me that....Harry did this." I hated it.

I was never treated like anything there. For eleven years, before I started Hogwarts, I lived in a cupboard beneath the stairs in our house, barely large enough to call a crawl space. Yet it was everything I had. I'd be locked in, yes, I'd be dragged out, shoved in and ordered around, but it was the one thing I could call my own. I could slip in there and treasure the few things I managed to posses over the years. A few of Dudley's old broken toys ('I want a new one! This one broke!' Bloody whale sat on the things, that's what...) and a few scraps of paper and a stick of charcoal I found in the garbage one day.

I wore Dudley's old clothes, which were hideously big. Hence why I was initially in shock that you were dressing me in such___not loose clothes. I was frankly surprised that was possible despite seeing it around Hogwarts. I was only allowed a total of two days schooling a week; so I'd usually go Monday morning to turn in homework, and get the next two days worth of assignments, then Wednesday afternoon, Thursday afternoon and Friday morning. That was all. I wasn't worthy enough to get a full schooling. I still made sure I learned everything. I'd talked to my teachers in private, and they understood the situation. I left out the bit of having to do a full housewife's chores every day.

Severus purred against Harry's ear then, one nimble, narrow_fingered hand sliding down the young man's side, "Well well well, no more fighting?"

Draco's temper flared up again, these people were going to die, they'd dared to harm his ... what was Harry to him now? What was Harry trying to tell him with this letter anyway?

"Ple...please...stop. I...I just want...want the potion....p-please..." His voice was a child's...quiet and a whisper. Starting to tremble in worry of this, he whimpered again, trying to find strength to push away again.

Up at dawn to make breakfast. Serve breakfast. While they ate, go make all their beds. Collect Dudley's back pack and finish the homework he didn't finish on his own because he'd rather play video games (wonderful thing, you'd love them...I stole a play or ten whenever no one was home). Return downstairs. Clean the dishes. Eat the bare mount of scraps left for me; if any. Make lunch, then cart off to school. I'd try to barter food in school, but it never worked; never made any friends there. Dudley threatened to beat them all 'to a seed' if anyone was caught talking to me. Then I'd return home at lunch, and make dinner, then go about weeding the garden, preparing supper, dusting/vacuuming/washing/scrubbing/cleaning/disinfecting or organizing the house. Then supper arrived and I was to serve it, then go sit in my cupboard until they were done. Clean the dishes, take out the trash, do Dudley's homework and then if there was any food left, I was permitted to eat. Then immediately to bed after washing that dish (if I simply used fingers to avoid this I got punished).

They made sure to never talk about my parents, even when I asked if the crash was their fault ('of course it was the bitch's fault!') or whether anyone else had been hurt. Who the rest of my family was ('you have no family, no one loves you'). Nothing. All I ever knew was Petunia, Vernon and Dudley. And Dudley's "friends" when they went out for "tea". A.K.A.: going to beat up anyone they could find.

Once I started Hogwarts, I was treated even worse. More chores I couldn't possibly get done in a day, which would carry over to the next day and so on until I was caught up. I spent numerous nights simply doing chores. Which would get me into trouble because I was 'causing a racket'. Basically, it was a no win situation. Everyone that new I existed had been told I went to a school for the 'hopeless' cases. I was told that I wasn't beaten enough, that apparently nothing was getting through to me.

Third year I blew up my Aunt, not Petunia but Vernon's sister, and I escaped tot he Leaky Cauldron on the Night Bus. That was freedom that I was happy to have.

Fifth year, as I'm sure you were told by Lucius, I nearly got expelled. I was expelled actually, until Dumbledore stepped in. I was tried in front of the *entire* Wizengamot. It was horrible, Dumbledore wouldn't even look at me. I didn't know what to think, but thankfully I got off on all charges.

Severus' brow arched slightly, "I believe we've been over this Harry, if you want the potion, you're going to have to pay for it, one way or another."

Draco realized, dimly that not only was he growling, but he was grinding his teeth. He managed to stop doing both through sheer force of will.

Harry attempted to growl again, trying to push onto his hands so he'd have more leverage. "I...told you...I'll pay you however much you...want__just...not this..."

Can you believe that? Expelled for conjuring a Patronus to save my ass and my cousin's ass from at least three Dementor's who were trying to Kiss us. Nearly got Dudley too. Not that it would have been that much of a loss... Merlin I hated him...them all. Hogwarts was life. Home. Everything I had. Now...now it's nothing like that anymore and I have to force myself not to think of it as Hogwarts when I'm with you in order to just...be.

I...never told anyone this. Only Poppy and Remus know...knew. The beginning of this year, before the war even really started (I still can't believe it was over in a week...) and I was still at the Dursley's...I lost hope already. I'd given up. I angered Vernon constantly, trying to see how angry he could get. Honestly, I wanted him to physically do something to me so I'd never have to go back. He never did. Was still afraid that I'd do magic on him because I'd done it before and got out of my expulsion.

I was tired, the whole summer I'd gotten owl after owl from people I didn't know, telling me how much their lives and children believed in me. How much they knew that I was that saving grace. At least a few people were honest enough to say they counted on me saving everyone, but would probably never think of 'Harry Potter' again once it was over.

I suppose that was true enough. It's over. They won't think my name again. Because they're dead.

Merlin I failed...

But I just couldn't handle it. I don't know whether it was the fact that I knew that I'd be nothing once it was all over. That no one would care what happened to me. I know I was merely a 'thing' that was used. Something that could save the world from destruction. I couldn't take it.

The Dursley's went out one day to a picnic, so I knew they'd be gone for a long time. Food. Y'know.

I had just finished opening about a hundred owls from 'non-hopefuls', as Hermione had called them. I felt like shit, more so than usual. I was angry, and upset, and just down beaten. It was as if I'd just spent the last two years losing every match and then losing the house cup to you. Horrible.

I grabbed my wand. I'd learned a new spell just before leaving Hogwarts in fifth year. Dolerpio. Not the best one. It came from two root words... Dolens, and Diripio. I spent nearly three or four hours in a daze, simply casting it over and over upon myself. Not constantly however. I wanted to take the time I knew I had to simply watch the effects. Remus found me. I suppose he had some charm on me to let him know when I was in danger or injured at that Dursley's�or maybe he was just being nosy. Either way, he stopped me. But not after a long fight; words. Though it did turn to wands after. I was angry with him, with everyone. No one cared about me. What everything was doing to me. What it was like to live at Privet. What it felt like to literally have the wizarding world on your shoulders. What it was like to fight V...him.

Severus' smile was still predatory, "And I believe I've mentioned that money is of no real use to me at this time?"

Draco had to set the letter down once more, this was wrong on so many levels, and for once he knew bluffing his way through imperiously wouldn't work. Which of course, meant he was at a loss.

Harry's forehead rested against the cool desk. "Please...I...I don't want it right now then...I...fuck....at l-least let me...let me take the potion first...." He was fighting tears, and failing but only small ones hit hte desk as he desperately tried to pull away from him...clawing at him with his fingers.

I suppose I really freaked out Poppy then, for sure. Possibly even Remus. I think they realized then how much it was affecting me. About bloody time, I said. Really. Does it often take someone laying at their death bed, still charming themselves with what strength they have...then a rejuvenation spell forced upon them...then a verbal and then magical fight to make people realize that they're pushing someone too hard? Does it really take seeing someone's body torn to pieces almost literally? Literally torn, in pieces metaphorically. Dolens means painfully. I wanted to feel the pain that I'd been ignoring for years. I wanted to scream out my frustrations. I wanted to hurt, be normal, not be told to lock everything away and keep everything under control because 'emotion is a tool that He can use against you'. Yea. I understood that. I loved...and he took Sirius away from me. I trusted, so he took Dumbledore. I cared, so Hermione and the Weasley's are gone. I got angry, so I had nightmares because I couldn't block my mind. I feared, and I failed. I didn't fear and I got hurt.

I wanted it to end.

Diripio means to separate, or to tear apart. Tear. Not cut. Not nice clean lines that everyone would expect. No, clean lines meant that there was a distinct line that I couldn't handle. These were rips. Tears. No definite explanation on what was ripping my soul to pieces. Is there such a thing as a soul? I wonder sometimes.

Anyway. The skin was torn apart everywhere upon me. They showed me pictures later that Creevey had managed to get and hoped that it would scare me from doing it again. It should have in all honesty. I looked hideous. I couldn't recognize anything�not even that tiny bit of a scar that should have been there. But I'd torn that as well. I don't remember how I managed to make it that far and not pass out, or break down and scream in pain. I remember that pain now�Poppy works miracles. Not always for the best in the �victim's' eyes however.

I'm not numb. I didn't block out the pain in hopes to forget it. I remember it more vividly than my previous attempt here with you. Feeling that pain flowing through you is...it was almost euphoric at the time because I believed that things would work out after that, and I knew that I wouldn't be able to escape everything then, so I wanted to feel it. Last time, I had honestly believed that I would succeed despite the lack of wand to use for assistance. It was clear in my mind that I wasn't going to live through any more shit after that.

We both know how well that worked out.

Severus' brow arched slightly, smiling, "So you're telling me you want to remember it then." His voice had dipped to an almost purr, "Mm, thoughtful of you."

Draco was reading more quickly now, he was delaying and he might not have time left to be delayed, if the letter was any real sign at least.

"NO! I...I...just...let me go...p-please..." He was shivering at the tone of his Professor's voice, and it scared him. A lot. He simply wanted the potion...and to be saved by Draco.

That was why in the beginning of the year I kept disappearing to Poppy's. She wanted me to keep popping in on her and tell her how I was doing and how I was holding out. Turns out she didn't only study medicine but she took some muggle Psychology too. Lucky me.

I attempted two more times before the war started. At the time of the war, I hadn't tried for a month, but it was still pretty bad. Every evening one of the teachers would pull me aside, sometimes even three or six would, to make sure that I was doing alright and I was feeling alright.

It was annoying. I wanted the war over so then everyone would forget and I could go back to whatever. I suppose it has happened. But now I want to forget. Everything. I want to go back to being oblivious about everything like I was before Hagrid came to find me. But I want to know about the wizarding world, and I want to know that I am one, but I don't want to know who I was. What I failed, what I dealt with�any of that. Just�make it go away.

That's true you know. I didn't know there was such a thing as magic before Hagrid arrived. Like I said, I was simply the surviving victim in a car accident that had killed my parents and given me a scar. That's all.

I doubt you ever had detention with Umbridge�actually I don't know if anyone else did. You know what her methods of teaching me not to lie were? Etching the words "I will not tell lies" into the back of my hand. You can still see faint lines of the words under the right lights sometimes. So many times I just felt like coming out to the world and saying that I had indeed been lying for years. That I had killed Cedric, petrified all those students, and everything else. Just to make it go away. If I denied it, it wasn't there�right? It worked for Fudge, so why not me? Because I knew it was real. He had simply denied to listen tot he truth�he hadn't lived the truth.

Once the war started, I hid my invisibility cloak and the Marauder's Map in the Room of Requirement. I didn't want it to fall into the hands of anyone else. I didn't know who I could trust, so I simply trusted nothing.

If you want them, feel free to get them. Actually, I want you to have them. My Gringott's key is in a pocket in the cloak (vault 687), and I want the money to be used, not just...sitting there. It'll probably make you the most wealthy wizard ever, since you already have a �Malfoy Fortune' to your name. I'm sure you'll be able to use the cloak for something, or someone will, and I simply want you to have the map. It will help you keep tabs on where I am should I wander off doing something stupid like this again.

The Marauder's Map was made by �messer's Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs'. Moony being Professor Remus Lupin as he was a werewolf. Wormtail, as I'm sure you know by now, is Peter Pettigrew. Padfoot was Sirius because his animagus form was a black dog. Or the Grim as Trelawney would say. And Prongs was my dad, his animagus form being a stag.

Severus chuckled again, nibbling the crest of Harry's ear once more as he leaned in again, keeping Harry pinned, "Now, do you want to remember it or not Potter? You can't have it both ways."

Draco blinked twice, things were falling into place now, and of course, that made him feel like an idiot, and that was something he hated.

Whimpering quietly, Harry shook his head. "N-no I don't..." He hated this, but he knew the sooner he let Snape get on with it...the sooner he'd forget everything.

All you need to do to use it is tap the parchment with your wand and say �I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good' and the map of Hogwarts will reveal itself. Every secret passage and every person on the grounds as well. and in order to make the map blank again, simply tap it and say 'Mischief Managed.' That's how the Twin's got around so easily and never got caught. I got it in third year when I wasn't able to go to Hogsmeade.

Speaking of which, third year, when you bugged Hermione and Ron by the Shrieking Shack...I was the invisible monster that was pulling your pants down and throwing snowballs and all that.

Oh, and in second year when Crabbe and Goyle were acting weird during Christmas break, that was because Ron and I had used a Polyjuice potion to become them. We were trying to figure out what you knew about the heir of Slytherin and the chamber.

After Sirius disappeared again after we broke him free from the Kiss third year, I kept on going to the Shrieking Shack at night because it gave me some sense of what was going on. It gave me a moment to think about where I discovered who had really killed my parents. Not Him, but Pettigrew. He did them in as Secret Keeper, so it was him that killed him. Sure, Tom did the actual deed, but Pettigrew did it. I learned the truth in the shack, (and I knocked Snape unconscious, which was a feat in itself) and it just gave me some peace to think. In some ways it reminded me of the comfort of the cupboard beneath the stairs which I lived in for eleven years until Hogwarts freed me.

I don't know whether I have the strength to cite much more for the quill. Already I'm sat down almost an hour and a half ago feeling weak. Now I feel like I'm going to pass out. I'm trying hard to keep the magic to the quill going, but it has already faltered it's fair share of times and I've had to switch to manual. I'm sure you've noticed the changed in writing here and there.

Draco�I'm sorry I didn't have the courage to tell you what I've done...why I can't face it anymore. I truly hope that this owl will be able to explain enough. The last thing I request as Harry Potter�is that you teach me to play Quidditch again. I don't know whether I'll forget, but I want to play again. I want to do one-on-one Seeker challenges with you. I want to fly again. Put a spell on me so I can't leave the pitch, I don't care.

I. Just. Want. To. Fly.

I want to love you. I do love you. I want you to love me too, but I know that this is impossible. I don't even know whether you understand what I mean when I said it that once to you. I don't know if I'll ever know what I meant again, whether things will return to some...previous normality.

Please forgive me.

Love,

Harry

Severus nodded once, one hand finally snaking around Harry's hip to press against the front of his pants, nimble, narrow fingers tugging at the button and the zip, "Well best I exact my payment now then hmm?"

Draco swore. And quite colorfully. Then he shook himself, sweeping his hair back away from hsi face and tying it in a knot at the nape of his neck, robes swung over his shoulders, wand securely in his sleeve before storming down to the dungeons.

Harry's fingers clawed aat the desk, whimpering. His eyes were clenched shut trying to keep in his mind the memory of Draco's smell (vanilla and cinnamon) and his touch and his words that made him fall. Sobbing quietly, he trembled but did what he could to keep from shoving him away. Get this over with....think about the potion...the end result and not what's happening...

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Responses to Reviews on this Chapter

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Fel Al
dark2kyo@yahoo.com
NOOOO!!!!!!
You can't leave it there!!!!
Please say that Draco saves him before Snape can do anything.
Update soon.

Oh, but I *can* leave it there. And I *did*. ^_^ And I say no more. Will update when I can.

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Dezra
acraftycutie@yahoo.com
Is this another one of those stories where it'll be too late for Draco to save Harry from the rape?

Umm...I don't know. And if it turns out that way, then I appologize if you don't like it. But if you don't like it, don't read it. *shrug*

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Queen mAlice
wow

fantastic as always. You know, harry really is stuck with the short end of the stick 90% of the time.

can't wait for the next one!

^_^ Thankies! I appreciate your comments!!

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moidy
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! ....... that's all ive got to say.
moidy

AHH!! *giggles* ^_~

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ura
Snape should die a painful death!

I agree. I think. Yes. Maybe. No. Maybe. Yes. Now I'm just trying to confuse you.

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Anon
Save him! this chapter was very good. I liked the way you cut between the two scenes, very clever.

Yay! Thank you!! ^_^

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