Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Amore et Amicitia	By : Kimmimaru Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Sirius/James Views: 6685 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters or settings by JK Rowling. I make no profit from this story.

Chapter List
- 34
- 35
- 36
AN: Ok, so I liked writing this, its a bit of fun but it does have a little angst on Remus' part for a change. Enjoy and thank you for reading/reveiwing!

Chapter Thirty-Five: Ite viam suam (Go your own way)

The muggle came with a grunt and pulled out of Sirius who wrinkled his nose, he sighed. “Better?” He asked, the man was sweaty and sated but Sirius wasn’t even horny. He changed quickly and took the packet of cigarettes, he stuck one behind his ear and tucked the packet into his back pocket. “Right...that knock...”

The man sighed and tapped a pattern on the bedside table, Sirius listened and nodded when he got it. He walked to the door and repeated the knock, the lock clicked and the door opened. Sirius stepped out into the dark hall way, there was a boy wearing a blindfold and chains on his arms and legs to hobble movement. “We hope you enjoyed your time with us, sir, please feel free to visit us again.” He spoke in a way that told Sirius It was rehearsed. He turned on his heel and began following the signs that said EXIT. He passed doors that were closed and some stood open, those he peered curiously inside and sometimes saw a girl lying spread eagled on the bed, others it would be a boy chained by the wrist once he caught twins huddled close to each other. He turned back to the exit and continued on his way, he knew he should probably sympathize with them but he couldn’t save them. He couldn’t save them all and hope to escape as well. It would have been suicide to help them. But perhaps he could help them in some other way, he grinned to himself and skipped slightly as he found the fire door and pushed it open. He pushed open the door and slipped outside, it banged shut and he found himself on the fire escape stairs, he easily slid down them and landed lightly on his feet. They were still bare but he didn’t care all that much as he paused to light his cigarette and smoked while he walked away from the horrible place.

Sirius walked down the street it took him a moment to get his bearings but when he did he realised he knew exactly where he was. He hummed while he walked until he found a Muggle Law Enforcement Station, he recognised the design from books he had read and found a nearby Muggle Communication device, now would come the hard bit. He stepped inside the tiny cubical and gazed at the confusing equipment, luckily the emergency number was pasted on the inside of the glass box and he dialled three nines before realising he had to pick up the receiver. He sighed and did it again with the receiver pressed to his ear.

When he had reported the Brothel he stepped out of the glass box and pushed his hands inside his pockets as he walked down the road, he knew he would have to find some money from somewhere to lessen the burden on the Potters and he needed a new wand and brand new school things. When he had left Grimmauld Place he had left everything behind. He began humming to himself softly as he walked, his eyes roved around the place casually as he watched the muggles going about their daily business. It was a glimpse of silver that caught his attention, he did a double take and found himself gazing at a large courtyard full of shiny new Motorbikes. He moved forward, his feet taking him closer until he was stood beside a black, beautifully shiny bike with a strip of vivid green running down both sides of it. “Kawasaki...” He breathed softly, gently running his hand over the soft leather seat and chrome exhaust. He could feel his heart hammering in his throat, his fingers twitched in desire and he licked his lips as he imagined how it would feel to speed along the roads on its back.

“Kawasaki H2, or more commonly known as the Widowmaker.”

Sirius turned to see a man striding up to him, he was grinning broadly as he approached. He wore leathers, his trousers creaking as he walked, he had a pair of gloves tucked into his back pocket as he stopped before him. “It’s beautiful...” Sirius breathed, returning his attention to the bike.

“Beautiful but dangerous...our most popular bike. What do you know about bikes?”

Sirius cocked his head to the side, running his eyes along the leather seat. “748 cc Air-cooled, oil injected, 3-cylinder, transverse, two-stroke Engine. Top Speed of 126 mph. 55 kilowatts at 6800 rpm. Chain driven 5-speed, 1 down-4 up pattern transmission. Inner spring telescopic front fork, three-position spring preload adjustable shock absorber and swing arm (rear) Suspension.” The words rolled off his tongue, he remembered when it had all been foreign to him, until he had begun to develop an obsession.

“You certainly know your stuff...” The man said seemingly impressed, he paused and eyed Sirius curiously. “You have no shoes...”

Sirius looked down at his bare feet and smiled. “I lost them.” He said with a smile.

“I see, well then young man, come inside and let’s talk.”

Sirius felt a stir of excitement and followed the Muggle into the low building at the back of the lot.

XXX

James sighed heavily, he gazed at the door to his house through exhausted eyes. “After all that...we couldn’t find him.”

Remus shook his head and ran fingers through his hair. “He’s got to be somewhere...”

Peter gazed around them with slightly blood-shot eyes. “What’s that noise?”

James paused to listen and they all heard a loud roar, his hand jumped to his wand and Remus’ eyes widened as they all turned to look down the road leading past the house. “It’s not...” He began as shock held him rooted to the spot.

“Impossible.” James muttered his eyes widening behind his glasses.

Peter could only gape in shock as a large, black motorbike came whizzing towards them at ridiculous speeds. “He’s insane!” He said with a hint of awe in his voice.

The motorbike skidded down the driveway spraying gravel everywhere, the boy sat astride it was grinning broadly. He wore no helmet so his hair flew back from his face, he was grinning manically. He came to a sudden halt, throwing up a spray of gravel over his friends who lifted their arms to protect their faces. Sirius cut the engine and leaned on the handle bars, he lifted a hand and swept his fringe from his eyes which glittered with happiness.

“S-Sirius...you...?” James was stuck for words, he indicted the bike with a weak hand.

“Do you like it?” Sirius asked as he swung his leg over the saddle and kicked the stand as he climbed off. “Got it on loan from a muggle man who seemed impressed with my knowledge.”

Remus blinked away his shock before a snarl appeared on his face, he lifted his wand and began advancing on Sirius who lifted his arms and eyed the point warily. He began backing away from the furious werewolf. “You. Fucking. Twat!” He hissed, marking each word with a sharp jab of his wand that burnt holes in Sirius’ shirt.

“Ow! Ow! Moony!” Sirius winced and tried to fend his friend off. “That hurts!”

“Like I give a shit! You deserve worse! Do you know what we’ve been going through?! Do you know how worried we were?! You useless, thoughtless bastard!”

Sirius threw his head back and laughed before tackling Remus to the floor with his arms around his neck. “I missed you too!” He cried and laughed as Remus swore violently and threatened him with eternal agony if he didn’t get off of him this very instant.

James stared at him while he untangled himself from Remus and stood up, his clothes were strange and his feet were bare. Sirius’ trousers were dirty and his shirt slightly torn but it was his face and smile that made James’ heart speed up, his eyes sparkled as he laughed and James couldn’t hold back anymore. He lifted back his hand and punched Sirius in the face, he stumbled backwards with a gasp of shock. “You git!” James breathed furiously, and, as Sirius was recovering he rammed him into the wall of his parents shed and kissed him. His fingers tangled in Sirius’ long hair, their lips moved together and their tongues met in their mouths. “Fuck!” James hissed with frustration. “You scared the living shit out of me!”

“I’m sorry Jamie.” Sirius replied, he pressed his forehead to his friends as their fingers entwined and he kissed him again. “I’m so sorry...”

Peter gazed at the scene looking disgusted, Remus was smiling and shaking his head. “Well, as long as you’re safe.” He said as Sirius drew away from James’ embrace. “But next time think before going running off like that, we love you Sirius and you hurt us.”

“I’m sorry...I really am...I wasn’t thinking straight. After everything that happened I lost it and nearly killed myself. But then I realised something...” His eyes lit up and his smile reappeared. “I realised that I’m not solving anything by running away, I’m not helping anyone especially not myself. I had an epiphany! I was picked up on the streets of London by this random Muggle guy who tried to sell my body for money...When I woke up I was with a fat bloke who was...well...that doesn’t matter, what does is that I realised what an arse I’ve been. For someone with my intelligence I was being ridiculously thick, I realised that now I’m not with my family, now I’m on my own I’m actually free!” He gazed at James when he spoke, but he was talking to all of them. “I’m free to finally be myself. I can tell the whole world what I am and I don’t have anything to be afraid of anymore! I’m finally free!”

James smiled and touched Sirius’ face. “I’m glad you’re ok, Siri.” He said softly and Sirius grabbed him into an embrace again. “Welcome home, Padfoot.”

“I’m home Prongs.”

Remus threw his arms around his friends and sighed as the warmth filled his heart. “Our pack is back together, just how it should be.”

“James!”

The boys broke apart as a woman came running from the house, Dorea’s hair was falling free from it’s bun and her pale violet robes flapped around her feet as she threw herself at her only son. James choked as his mother wrapped him in a death grip. “M-Mum...” He wheezed. “Mum...you’re choking me...”

She eased her grip but didn’t release him, tears fell freely down both her cheeks as she began smoothing hair from James’ face and looking at him intensely. “I thought I had lost you! I thought...I was so worried! Don’t you ever, ever do that to me again!”

“I’m sorry mother.” James said softly, patting her on the back.

“Mrs. Potter...” Sirius began, but Dorea cut him off with a sharp slap. It burned but it wasn’t that painful and he lowered his head.

“And you! You Mr. Black are in serious trouble. I was contacted by the school young man.” She sounded stern but it was a motherly kind of tone and Sirius smiled to himself, careful to hide it behind his hair. “Professor Dumbledore has gone looking for you, now I expect you to send him a letter of apology and you will be grounded for the rest of the summer. And you James Potter, will be as well. Do you know what I went through?”

“Sorry...” James and Sirius chorused together.

Dorea sighed before dragging Sirius into an embrace full of warmth and motherly affection. “Please, please don’t run away again.” She whispered as Sirius stiffened in her arms. “We love you Sirius, like a son. We don’t want to see you hurt.”

“I’m sorry Mrs. Potter, I promise it won’t happen again.”

“Good.” She pulled away with a watery smile and looked at the two marks on his face. “I am sorry for hitting you but I was terrified, here...” She withdrew her wand and healed it. “There, now you four boys come inside. Remus, your father is here and Peter your mother is inside with my husband and Remus’ father.”

Remus suddenly went pale but he nodded, Peter whimpered. Sirius wrapped his arms around Remus and kissed his temple. He stood behind him and grinned into his neck. “Thank you.” He breathed and closed his eyes. “Thank you for worrying...for caring.”

With a small smile Remus put a hand on Sirius’ arm. “I’m sure you’d do the same for us...being grounded is worth it ten times over...as long as I know you’re safe.”

Sirius drew away and ruffled Remus’ hair. “I am, and I will repay you all.”

XXX

John Lupin was a tall man with a face resembling his sons, he had a head full of dark brown hair that was messy from where he had been running his hands through it. Mrs. Pettigrew was short and plump with a sad looking face and her sons watery blue eyes, Sirius thought she rather resembled a Basset hound and wandered if that would be her animagus form.

“I can’t believe you...” John said softly, he was pale with fright and anger as Remus gazed at his feet. “You run away without even a note telling us where you are?! This is...this is so unlike you Remus I don’t know what to say...you’re mother was so terrified she made herself sick! After everything we have done for you, after all the times we-...” He cut himself off and Remus winced as he lowered his head even further. John looked away and gazed out the window of the Potters home. “You won’t be seeing your friends for the rest of the summer...you’re grounded young man.”

“Yes father.” Remus sighed.

“Mr. Lupin...sir...” Sirius began slowly, he met the man’s eyes. “It’s my fault, don’t blame the others...I ran away first and I should have considered that they would come after me. I had a hard time at home you see and have only recently managed to escape, because of that I wasn’t thinking and I put all my friends at risk because of my stupidity. I’m sorry.”

John eyed Sirius warily. “Your family have a reputation even in the Ministry...I understand why you ran away but Remus followed of his own accord, he didn’t have to and he shouldn’t have done it.”

“I’m sorry father.” Remus muttered feeling guilt weighing on him heavily, he twisted his hands in his worn old shirt. “It won’t happen again.”

“No, it won’t.” John sighed again, he looked tired and both Sirius and James saw the way he kept avoiding eye contact with his son. Sirius frowned curiously.

“Oh my poor baby!”

Everyone turned to see Mrs. Pettigrew embracing her son tightly, his head squashed against her ample bosom. “Oh! My poor, sweet little baby! Did the nasty boys drag you along on some horribly dangerous adventure?! Oh you must have been so scared without your mummy there to save you!”

“M-Mum...Mum get off...You’re embarrassing me...Muuuum!”

Sirius had great difficulty in stifling a derisive laugh, he frowned and turned away before he exploded with laughter. Remus watched with a raised eyebrow and James’ mouth twitched as he too suppressed humour.

“Remus?” John said and his son looked at him, again he never quite met Remus’ eyes. “I want to talk to you outside.”

Remus nodded, Sirius grabbed his hand and squeezed once. Their eyes met and Remus managed a weak smile before returning the pressure on his hand, James squeezed his shoulder once as he followed his father out the room. They stood in the hall way and a silence fell that was awkward, Remus fidgeted and looked at his feet. “Where did you go during the full?” John asked, his voice trembling slightly. “Did you make sure you were safe? Did you protect your friends? Did they see?”

Remus shook his head slowly. “I’m not stupid, Father. I found somewhere safe to change, I made sure my friends were well protected...trust me for once.”

John sighed and put both hands on his son’s shoulders, Remus could feel the tension in his father and the scent of fear clung to him as always. “Dumbledore trusted you enough to let you attend school, Remus, and now you risk blowing everything we worked so hard to gain by giving yourself away?! Do you understand what you could have done? You’re dangerous, Remus! You could have killed any one of those boys! Why didn’t you think?!”

“I did!” Remus whispered hoarsely. “I always think, Father, It’s all I ever think about! What if I killed them? What if I woke up one day to find myself covered in their blood?! Do you think I’m stupid?! It’s hard enough without having to listen to your dire warnings every day. You lock me up in the bloody cage like some kind of animal and leave me there alone to scream and rip myself to shreds! Don’t think that I can’t hear mother sitting outside the cellar door and sobbing, begging you let me out...I’ve lived with this for sixteen years and I know how to protect my friends by now.”

John released Remus, as if afraid to touch him. Remus looked away, he knew how much his father was afraid of him, he also knew he loved him, but it was hard to meet his eyes when he knew he would see the torn emotions. “Do they know about you?”

Remus sighed. “Yes. They’ve known since we were twelve.”

“And you can trust them?”

Remus met his father’s eyes and his own shone with certainty. “With my life.” He said firmly.

John nodded and leaned back against the wall, Remus saw something he had never seen in his father’s eyes and it filled him with shock. Guilt. His father felt guilty...the discovery was a shock and he was rooted to the spot for a long time before his father embraced him. This too was a rare occurrence and he couldn’t lift his arms to respond. “I’m sorry, Remus. I’m...so...so sorry...for everything...I’ve hurt you...I hurt you so badly and I...I will never forgive myself. We’ll find a cure, I promise.”

Remus sighed and closed his eyes. “There is no cure.” He whispered, but his father ignored him as he pulled away.

It was always the same, John Lupin loved his son with a passion and he would happily die for him as any parent would for their children. But there was the wolf. His son was infected by an evil he could not control and although he knew it wasn’t his fault, he knew Remus couldn’t stop himself while in the form of the wolf he was still terrified. Every night at the full moon while Remus was home during the summer, he locked him down in the cellar as the full moon rose above the horizon and bathed everything in its ghastly glow. He had tried to drag his wife away from the door but she refused to leave, she sat there all night screaming and crying and begging him to let him out as the wolf howled with rage within. John had to hold her to his chest and prevent her from unlocking the door, he hated every minute of it. He hated the knowledge that his son was a monster, he hated it worse because he was part of the Ministry’s division who dealt with these monsters. He had been forced to place his own sons name upon the register that terrible night he had been attacked, he remembered holding the dripping quill above the parchment, his tears making the ink run as he had written; Remus John Lupin, bitten at age four by known feral, Fenrir Greyback. The ministry had treated him with disdain and fear ever since that night, he had been looked over for every promotion and now they struggled for money. But he would have given the world just to ensure his sons safety.

Remus looked away from that guilt ridden gaze, a peculiar feeling rose within him and he shifted uncomfortably. He could smell the guilt on his father, he remembered the odd flash of the same scent coming from the cellar door as he tried to shatter the chains binding him in place, his claws tearing, ripping at his own flesh until the stone walls were spattered with blood. He looked again and his father was looking old. “You never did tell me the name of the wolf that bit me.” He breathed.

John flinched and looked away. “You don’t need to know, it doesn’t matter anymore.”

“It does...it does to me. I want to know father...please...”

“Remus, it’s not the right time to be asking...”

“I have to know.”

“I...”

“Tell me!” Remus grabbed his father’s sleeve and pulled him so they were looking at each other.

John felt a sickening jolt in his stomach and he felt tears burning in his eyes. “Twelve years ago I was making house calls to some known Werewolves, there had been rumours they were planning an attack on humans...I...I was ensuring they were safe when...when I visited one. He goes by the name of Greyback...”

Remus’ eyes widened. He knew that name. Everyone knew that name. His face drained of colour and he swayed as he fell against the wall. “It was...deliberate?” He breathed.

“Yes. Greyback...he...found out where I lived, intending to kill me instead...instead he found you...I-I...I should have been the one...I’m sorry, Remus.”

Remus looked at his father carefully, he frowned slightly. “Greyback only attacks those who anger him...what did you do? What did you say to him to make him angry?”

John’s eyes swam with unshed tears. “When I was talking to him he was being uncooperative, so I...I threatened him with prison. That was before we knew he went around and bit children to weaken the human wizards, this was before we were sure it was he who was biting the children and taking them away. I told him I would ensure he was... ‘put down like a dog’...Remus...I lost my temper, you have to understand that I wasn’t thinking...”

Remus tore himself free of his father’s grip and he moved back, his eyes wide. He felt the wall at his back and choked on his horror. “It’s your fault!” He gasped as his knees gave way and he slipped to the carpet. “You...you pissed him off...You...I...” He pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. “I’m not coming home tonight.” He whispered.

“Remus...”

“No. Let me...let me think...I’ll come back, I just...I can’t...” He closed his eyes and pushed hands into his hair.

John gazed at his son, he remembered the bright, happy little boy he had been. He remembered running down the corridors of St. Mungos with terror ripping him to shreds inside, he remembered seeing his wife standing outside a door she had turned to him with dark, red rimmed eyes before screaming at him. He remembered the feel of her fists as she hit his chest, he remembered holding her wrists in his hands and yanking her roughly against him. He could hear her desperate sobs in his dreams at night. He could remember looking into the room where his son lay, he had been so small, so innocent as the Mediwitches and wizards had worked on him. He had slammed his fists into the door and sank to his knees, he was terrified. A single threat, a simple bout of stupid arrogance had led to his son’s disfigurement and illness. It was his fault and every time he saw the moon he was reminded that he had turned his own son into a monster and nearly killed his wife. “Remus, forgive me...” He breathed.

Remus’ shoulders shook but he didn’t look up, he couldn’t even look at his father as he heard him leave. The door closed with a snap that echoed in his soul. He curled in on himself until he felt friendly warmth around him, a hand pushed through his hair and he let himself fall into that familiar body. “It was his fault.” He whispered.

Sirius held him close and closed his eyes. “He still loves you, Remus. He’s your father.”

“He angered Greyback...Greyback who is known to bite children!”

“I know...I heard...” Sirius tightened his grip on his friend and nuzzled his hair affectionately. “But both your parents love you, both of them work hard to find a cure while you’re at school. Both of them love you with all their hearts and that is something to treasure...I wish I had parents like yours.”

Remus looked up and saw Sirius’ face, he sighed and nodded. “I’m sorry, I know they love me, I know they care but I...I just need some time to digest it all.”

“Brilliant!” James said from the living room doorway. “Looks like it’s a Marauder sleep over!” He laughed and pulled both his friends into a tight embrace. “This is going to turn into a good summer. Even if I am being punished.” He grinned and Remus couldn’t help it, he smiled back.
- 34
- 35
- 36
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Amore et Amicitia