Disharmony in the Dungeons

Disclaimer: All recognizable characters belong to JKR. All situations are mine. No $$$ is being made from this fanfic.
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Chapter 36 ~ Trying to Come to Terms

Severus apparated with Hermione into their bedroom and gently laid her on the bed and divestoed the robe and harness from her body. His black eyes swept over her bruised breasts and belly and rested on the blood between her thighs. Then he looked at the Mark on her forearm. She wouldn’t be wearing any short-sleeved shirts or tank tops for a while. He was sure she would find a way to cover it eventually.

The Potions Master carefully rolled Hermione over and saw the bruises from the stairs on her back and her reddened buttocks from his body pounding against him. He spread her cheeks and closed his eyes against the ripped flesh oozing blood. He had torn her badly. Normally the sight of such damage didn’t move the Potions Master, he was practically immune to the sight of blood and mutilated flesh. But this was different. This was his wife, and he was the cause of injuring such a loving creature.

He continued to examine her. Blood also flowed from her pussy. He swallowed, picked up the elixir he had left waiting on the nightstand and rolled the witch over. Hermione was unconscious, overcome by pain. He knew there had to be internal damage as well…he felt her shift too much, then tear inside.

Severus sat down on the bed, lifting Hermione slightly so she partially rested in his arms.

“Ennervate,” he said softly.

He hated to bring her to consciousness, but he had to get the elixir down her. Hermione groaned and attempted to curl up in his arms. Tears began to stream from her eyes. Severus uncorked the bottle and held it to her lips.

“Drink, Hermione. It will heal you,” he said softly, tilting the elixir against her lips.

Hermione began to feel immediate relief as her torn rectum sealed itself, and her broken inner wall repaired itself. Severus watched as her bruises lightened, then disappeared, her skin taking on its normal glow. Hermione sighed against him and fell still.

Severus scourgified his wife and the bed, removing all the blood. He turned the covers down and slid Hermione under them, tucking them around her securely. He looked down at her a moment, then extinguished the torches and left the room.

The Potions Master walked into the study and removed his clothing until he was left in his silk boxers. He transfigured his deatheater robe into a blanket and lay down on the sofa, pulling it over him and tried to go to sleep. Gods, what he had done.

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Hermione awoke in the morning looking for her husband. She felt no pain, and the night before felt as it if had been a horrible nightmare. Then she looked at the Mark on her arm and knew it had been very, very real. Severus had brutalized her violently, fucking her until she bled from both orifices, tearing her open. He had warned her it would be a terrible act, but she hadn’t known what the wizard was truly capable of sexually. She did know now. She wondered how many witches he had damaged for the Dark Lord’s pleasure, then decided she didn’t want to know. She looked at the bed. Severus hadn’t slept with her. This was the first time since they were married that he did not share her bed.

Hermione rolled out of the bed, her eyes falling on the bloody robe and harness, bringing the horror of the night before back in full relief. Her wand was in the top drawer of her dresser. She retrieved it and transformed the robe and harness into parchment, then burned them, scourgifying the ashes. She then walked to her wardrobe and pulled out her housecoat, tying it around her securely. She used the loo, brushed her teeth and washed her face, then left the bedroom and walked into the study.

She saw Severus tucked uncomfortably on the couch, a blanket halfway covering him. He was frowning in his sleep. She knew why he was out here. He couldn’t bring himself to sleep with her after what he had done to her. It was horrible for her, but it had to be horrible for him. He never looked at her once when he violated her. He couldn’t bring himself to watch what his body was doing to hers. But he did what he had to do to get her the Mark. At what price?

Hermione walked up to him, and shook his shoulder gently.

“Severus? Severus, wake up,” she said softly.

The Potions Master opened his eyes. They were horribly bloodshot, as if he hadn’t slept. He hadn’t really, drifting off only after the sun had been up for at least an hour. His black eyes shifted to Hermione’s face. He rolled to a sitting position, looking up at her.

“How are you feeling?” he asked her quietly.

“Fine. I’m fine Severus. Not in any pain at all,” she replied, hoping to comfort him.

“That’s good,” he said shortly.

They were both silent a long while. Finally Hermione asked him if he wanted breakfast.

“No,” Severus responded, not looking at her, “I’m not hungry.” The fact was he felt he would never eat again, his stomach was in so many knots. “You go ahead and order breakfast for yourself.”

Hermione didn’t like the way he sounded. She sat down next to him and started to place her hand on his thigh. He jumped and looked at her as if he had never seen her before.

“Severus, I’m all right. Don’t torture yourself. You did what you had to do, and I’m fine,” she said softly.

“Hermione, you have no idea how much I damaged you,” he replied. “How torn up you were.”

“I felt it, Severus. I know what happened to me. But I also know you didn’t want it to happen. You took no pleasure in it. And you healed me so I’m good as new,” she said.

“I healed you physically, Hermione…but how about emotionally? The elixir doesn’t cover that,” he said, his voice low with self-loathing.

“Severus, it all seems like a dream to me. A nightmare I woke up from this morning,” she said sincerely.

Severus looked at her, not believing her. How could she just let what he did to her go? Yes, she was warned, and expected the worst…but she still went through it. A wizard that claimed to love her still hurt her horribly. If he really loved her, he would not have brought her into this web of violence and deceit. He didn’t feel Hermione in his mind, but knew she was when she gasped at him, then scowled.

“Severus, I want to help you fight Voldemort. You did what you had to do to make it possible for me to do just that. Don’t question your love for me. I know you love me. You didn’t look at me once last night except when you first entered the throne room, and even then you were detached, not a part of what was happening. The you I love wasn’t in the wizard that brutalized me last night. But the you I love is here now. Please don’t punish yourself for something that had to be done. I willingly went to the Dark Lord, knowing what would happen. I am as much a part of it as you are, Severus. Now we are in the position to do something. I don’t want you pulling away from me now. The worst is over,” she said, placing her hand on his thigh again.

This time he didn’t react. Severus just looked at her, the image of her torn, brutalized body still playing in his head. He stood up.

“I need to get some air, Hermione,” he said.

In a flash he was dressed. He used magic. That was rare. He enjoyed the ritual of dressing himself.

“I’ll be back in a while,” the Potions Master said, walking to the study door, opening it and exiting. The wall lowered behind him.

Hermione didn’t see her husband for the whole day. It was now after ten, and she had gone to bed. She heard a noise in the study and sat up, listening. Severus whispered something quietly. Hermione eased out of the bed and walked into the study. The Potions Master was back on the couch, covered in the blanket, his eyes closed. She walked over to him.

“Severus, come to bed,” she said softly.

The Potions Master didn’t answer her.

“I’m not used to sleeping alone, Severus. I want you with me,” she said to him.

He still didn’t respond, and she was starting to get angry. She pulled the covers off of him, and he opened his eyes. He was dressed in his boxers.

“Severus, now you are punishing me too, and I’ve already been through enough. I want you off this couch and in the bed now!” she said, putting her hands on her hips and stomping her foot.

The Potions Master looked at her, then rolled off the couch and silently walked into the bedroom, followed by a scowling Hermione. He lifted the covers and climbed into the bed. Hermione slid in after him.

Severus turned over and faced the wall. Hermione lay there looking at him. At least he was in the bed. She decided not to push him further. He needed to work this out. It was almost like he was grieving. She sighed and closed her eyes, willing herself to sleep, hoping that her husband would come around soon.

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A/N: Poor Severus. Poor Hermione. This is hard for both of them, though Hermione accepts what happened. It is the Potions Master who hates himself. Ah, well. Let’s see what happens next. Please review.