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Heir to the Throne	By : Kaya_Winn Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 12341 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 4
Disclaimer: i do not own Harry Potter or any of J.K.Rowlings works. i do not make any money, or income off of this fanfiction.

Chapter List
- 36
- 37
- 38
Well, this is a very dark chapter, and probably not the best place to leave it for the holidays, but it's the best I got because CH 38 isn't done yet!

I hope you enjoyed the three new chapters! And I hope everyone has a happy new year!

Heir to the Throne

Ch 37

Love Lost

Warning:

the following chapter is very graphic.

It contains suicide, Character Death, and graphic gore.

If you do not like such things, do not read this chapter.

There will be an exert at the bottom of the chapter.

Harry was still sitting in the Hospital Wing when Madam Pomfry came back, demanding to know where Draco was. All Harry could do was shake his head, struggling not to cry, not to burst into tears as he stared blank, and misty eyed, at the far wall... he struggled not to see anything, struggled not to feel anything... Draco didn't love him... Draco didn't love him... he should have known better, why would Draco ever want someone like him? He was too skinny, he didn't have enough hair on his chest ad he wasn't big enough...down there... he had an ugly scar on his head, and across his body too for that matter, and his hair was the ugliest shade of brown he'd ever seen... he still couldn't get it to lay flat without spells...

'Harry James Potter that is ENOUGH!” the voice startled him, and he nearly jumped off the bed. He barley managed to catch himself as his head throbbed from the force in which Tom had yelled at him.

'Use your head Potter! He's a SERAPHIM for Merlin's Sake! They can't just leave someone like that! He LOVES you! Obviously that whore Pansy has done something to him! Go and get Snape.'

what did Tom know!? Nothing that was what...Tom knew nothing... he hadn't seen the look in Draco's eyes as he gazed upon him... the utter disgust in those bright silver eyes, the loathing, the hatred... Draco did not love Harry... the day at the park... the day in the woods where they discussed their future... maybe even those gorgeous purple and gold eyes... it was a lie... all a lie...

'And those sweet kisses... the way he touched you, the way he held you...Potter he showed you sides of himself that Lucius and I didn't even know existed! He LOVES you! You KNOW he does. HE knows it too deep inside! He's under a spell, or a potion he can't help himself and if you don't do something now, he's going to get sick... Harry without you he'll DIE!'

no...Harry knew better now. He shoved Tom out, slammed the door in his face and turned the lock as he headed out of the Hospital wing, tears running down his cheeks, too stunned to do anything but stare blankly as he walked along. He felt as if a giant knife had scooped out all of his insides, leaving him cut up and bleeding inside. He paused as he saw Hermione... she had known this was going to happen, she had seen Draco for who he really was. He started towards her and for a moment Hermione looked almost shocked as he wrapped his arms around her and began to sob.

“Harry?...Harry what is it!?” she sounded so shocked, utterly shocked. She'd never seen Harry cry before, ever... her arms wrapped around him as his legs buckled, dragging them both to the floor as he sobbed. He was shutting down, he had never held something so very precious before only to have it torn away... he'd never had anything... how could Draco do this? The blond knew the loveless life that he had lived...how could he be so cruel!?

“Harry speak to me!” Hermione ordered, worried as she stroked his hair, trying to get him to calm down enough to talk. For a long moment Harry couldn't find the words. Then it all spilled out, how Draco had seen Pansy, had gone to her, had told him those cruel and hateful things and Hermione looked stunned as she held him.

“oh Harry I'm so sorry...” she muttered, biting her lip as she stroked his hair. “come on Harry... stand up now...” she ordered pulling him as best as she could to his feet, hesitating, wondering where to take him before leading him tot he Gryffindor Dorms. At least she knew none of the icky Slytherin's would find him there. She took him up the stairs, settled him into his favorite chair, right next to the fireplace and fetched him a blanket. She was insane, but she did care very deeply about Harry, as overjoyed as she was to know that Draco was no longer in the picture, it hurt her to see Harry so heartbroken.

“Harry?” she asked softly, pressing something into his hands. A hot Butterbeer... Draco's favorite. Harry felt another wave of grief well up inside of him and he dropped the Butterbeer, recoiling away from it and pulling the blanket Hermione laid around his shoulders tight around himself, as if the thin material might protect him from the pain of the world. He ignored Hermione's attempts at comfort, she didn't understand... she didn't understand at ALL! No one understood, no one knew what was happening. He sobbed, pressing his face into his hands, as if somehow, somehow that would stop the pain and the burning tears.

He felt as if half of him had been ripped apart, leaving jagged sharp edges that tore at the rest of him. He felt betrayed, as if his very soul had tried to stab him in the back. He didn't hear Hermione pleading with him to calm down, didn't hear when others entered the Common room to find out where Harry and Draco where... didn't hear the fighting... all he could feel, hear, see, was his own shattered soul. He did start to come out of his own misery, just a little, at the sound of Blaise, and Neville, and Ron. Whoever had come in a few minutes ago, had rushed to find Harry's friends.

“Harry!?” Blaise asked softly, settling near Harry's knee, looking worried as he touched Harry's temple, stroking the hair out of his face, making Harry jerk away, his eyes filled with a dying light that made Blaise shudder.

“Harry, what is it, what's happened?” Neville asked softly, settling at Harry's other knee, both of them sitting on the ground, completely uncaring that their robes where getting wrinkled. Their hearts nearly froze when Harry whimpered, his eyes wide, pupils dilated to the point they nearly weren't there... Harry looked like death itself had come to claim everyone Harry had ever, and ever would love.

“Draco...” Harry whispered. “he... he doesn't love me he... he...” he swallowed thickly. “he never loved me.. he said... he said...” Blaise felt terror bloom inside of him, utter terror and he shook his head.

“Harry you know better than that! Draco loves you! You KNOW he does, he NEEDS you!” Blaise whispered softly, Ron looking stunned as he turned to Hermione, who looked almost as heartbroken as Harry did.

“Hermione! What, did you, DO!?” Ron demanded, Hermione jumping, looking shocked before looking mortified.

“me!? I didn't do anything!” she protested. “he caught me in the hall, told me what that blond bastard said to him! He started sobbing! I didn't know what to do!” Ron was surprised to realize that Hermione was just as shocked as Harry was, as shocked as the rest of them where by all of this. “i knew that blond bastard wasn't doing Harry any good! I KNEW Malfoy was only playing with him! I should have Done....”

“Shut UP!” Ron snarled, grabbing Hermione's cloak and pulling her to her feet, giving her a firm shake. “Draco LOVES Harry!” he hissed. “their Bonded! Don't you understand Hermione!? DRACO ISN'T HUMAN!” Hermione was gaping at him, and so where Neville and Blaise, looking almost horrified. “Draco NEEDS Harry! Without Harry he'll DIE! They'll BOTH Die!” Hermione looked stunned, horrified even.

“Draco is just using...” Hermione tried to sputter, tried to deny, didn't want to admit that Harry and Draco really where meant for each other. That they really loved each other.

“How would you know Hermione!?” Ron demanded. “You never even gave him a chance! Fuck Hermione I even gave him a chance!” Ron snarled. “Your nothing but a Bloody Hypocrite right now! All those years of trying to make me and those goddamn Slytherin's get along, and now here I am, fighting to keep Draco and Harry together, and your just sitting there trying to say it's all for the best!... IS HARRY DYING FOR THE BEST!?”

“Ron! Calm down!” Blaise demanded, wrapping his arms around the Volatile Gingers waist, kissing Ron's neck ever so gently. “Hermione doesn't know any better... she's been manipulated, you know this... Dumbledore's probably been telling her all sorts of lies...” Ron sighed and released Hermione's robes, the girl gaping at them in astonishment. “come on Ron, we need to get Harry... Harry!?” Blaise asked, utterly shocked as he cast his gaze around the room, horrified to realize... Harry wasn't there... he'd run off!

“oh no!” Hermione gasped, utterly mortified. “we have to find him! He'll Suicide!” she complained, everyone tensing as they stared at her, wide eyed. “if what you say is... is true... he'll try to kill himself rather than live without Draco!” Hermione was more worried about Harry, than she was about her once friends relationship... but, she had to admit.. Ron had a point... she'd never given Draco a chance... she'd... just assumed Dumbledore had known what he was talking about when the Headmaster had said Draco wasn't good for Harry.

“Spread out! Search everywhere!” Neville barked the order. “Ron! You go get Professor Snape! Blaise, you go get McGonagall, Hermione, you check Harry's old hiding places, Ron, when you've gotten Snape, take him up, see if Harry's hiding there, Ron, you take McGonagall down, she already knows about the chamber anyway and he might forget about the non Parsel entrances.” Neville admitted, everyone nodding as they vanished, Neville taking a deep breath as he closed his eyes and tried to focus himself... he had been training for this, training to take control and take command, but he had never expected it to be a search party for Harry... he had the hard job though... he had to find Draco and find out what happened.

~~**~~

Harry felt like dying, he wanted to die, he was half planning it as he staggered through the halls randomly, trying to decide where to hide... even emotionally broken Harry knew better than to hide where someone might find him. The Room of requirement, the founders quarters, the Chamber... nowhere would do, someone would find him. Why had he told his friends about them? Why hadn't he kept just one place a secrete? That would make this task so much easier...

he bit back another sob, Draco didn't want him, Draco didn't need him.... Draco didn't love him. The sharp edges of his heart and sole tore at him with every breath and every step, and he wondered if he couldn't just lay right there in the hall and do it?... no, they would find him, and bring him back if he did that.. no, that wouldn't do. He needed to find a place to hide! He gasped as he nearly walked into Dumbledore and Snape, both looking very upset and annoyed.

“Draco has abandoned Harry Severus, even you cannot deny that... the boy has been playing with Harry!” Dumbledore growled, actually looking furious over this... but Harry knew better, he could See into Dumbledore... what a time for his Heir powers to kick in! It was an annoyance... and it only made him even more depressed to see the bubbling joy deep inside Dumbledore at the fact that Harry and Draco, where no longer a couple.

“you don't understand Headmaster! Draco has been tampered with! That fool Parkinson has admitted it!” Snape hissed, not about to admit that she hadn't admitted it to anyone but her foolish giggling friends who would deny Pansy ever admitting such a thing, but Snape was a master of Legilimency... he knew what Pansy had done.

“it doesn't matter! Draco clearly cannot be trusted Severus, his father was, IS a death eater!”

“YOU STUPID OLD MAN!” Harry was shocked, he'd never heard Snape raise his voice before... even Dumbledore looked shocked. “Draco isn't human you idiot! He and Harry are bonded! Their Souls are tied together, whatever Pansy Parkinson has done, she's killed them BOTH! Draco's Magic is turning against him, and Hermione Granger is certain Potter has gone suicidal! They can't find him ANYWHERE!” now Harry saw the worry starting to fill Dumbledore, and the rage... Dumbledore hadn't realized Draco wasn't human... this made the headmaster angry. Harry decided to leave, now, before they found him listening and made him put a stop to his plans.

He knew better, Draco didn't love him... had never loved him. If Draco had really loved him, then some silly compulsion spell wouldn't have worked... nothing should have worked if Draco truly had loved Harry... Harry wished he could Drown... Drown, YES! What a lovely idea... he knew exactly where to go... no one would think to look for him there... no one! He moved quickly as Snape started yelling again, the words lost to him as he raced through the halls, his heart slamming loudly in his ears... he didn't want to admit to being excited... but he was. He really was... he was going to kill himself, and the thought pleased him.

The pain would be gone then. He wouldn't have to worry about anything ever again. No, never again. He would die, and he would be with all the people he had killed, he would get to say his apologies to his mum and dad, to Sirius and Lupin, to Dudley and Ginny and Cedric... he would say he was sorry, and the he would burn in hell where he belonged.

He skidded to a halt in front of the Prefects bath, whispering a powerful spell that Tom had taught him. It would unlock any door, even the password protected ones. He was well aware that no one else knew that he knew where this bath was, Cedric had told him where it was... and Harry had never told anyone about how the other boy had helped him... no one would look for him there. He stepped inside, and shut the portrait, locking it again as he studied the bathroom, eying up all of the taps... but decided not to add any bubbles... they where a luxury he didn't want. He turned all the taps on full blast with a touch of his magic, and stripped slowly as he considered how to go about it.

How did one kill themselves? He wasn't sure... he'd never thought about it before... he could try to drown himself, but it would take too long... it needed to be faster so he didn't coward out... part of him wondered why he would coward out of he really wanted to die, but the emotionally distraught part that was controlling him ignored that one little voice of sanity... he smiled a little as he remembered how much he had bled when he'd accidentally cut himself... yes, he would bleed and drown himself... two things would ensure his death.

He slid into the water, gripping his wand tightly as he considered his wrists... it was always the wrists when people talked of suicide, so he had to cut his wrists... how? A knife... double edged... yes... but where to get one? He shook his head and broke off one of the nozzle handles, it would have to do... he wasn't good at Transfiguration, but as long as the edges where sharp right? He made the correct wand motions and studied the small, but sharp edges he had made... it didn't look like a knife at all, it looked... weird... but it didn't matter.

He slipped into the pool, and closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth as he tucked the sharp blade in-between his knees, squeezing tight to hold it still, blood forming around the blade... he was ecstatic, there wasn't any pain at all, so sharp... so very sharp... he set both wrists along the bottom, and jerked up, slicing through flesh, blood immediately spilling out of him to drop into the water, the droplets curling through the water as if dancing. Harry smiled as he looked down at his bleeding wrists, he didn't know how long he stared at his bleeding wrists. He smiled again, standing as he made his way deeper into the pool. He felt dizzy, and sick... he was pleased, he figured it was from blood-loss. His body was sluggish and he could barley think, barley remember... all he knew was that he was happy, the pain was gone...

He slid his head under the water and relaxed as he slowly sank, air bubbles cascaded off of him and headed for the surface, Harry's wand laying feet away from him. He smiled as he watched Myrtle slip into the pool, her eyes wide in horror as she finally took note of the blood. Harry turned away from her, it was too late for her to fetch help... he emptied his lungs, smiled... an inhaled, pulling water in, choking... but it was too late, it had been done, his mind panicked, clawing... but his body was limp, sluggish... he stared up through the water, feeling fear, and terror flooding him, and then everything went dark.

~~**~~**~~**~~**~~**~~**~~**~~**~~**~~**~~

Overview

Harry was very depressed after he learned that Draco didn't love him. His friends attempted to talk him out of it and Hermione learned, Via Ron, how much Harry really does need Draco. Dumbledore also finds out that Draco isn't human, and that Harry and Draco have a Soul Bond through Draco's Seraphim nature. Harry snuck away, and slit his wrists in the Prefects bath, and lost consciousness.
- 36
- 37
- 38
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Heir to the Throne