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The Long Road	By : SinisterMe Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Snape/Remus Views: 63598 -:- Recommendations : 3 -:- Currently Reading : 18
Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction using characters from the Harry Potter world, which is trademarked by J. K. Rowling. This story is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made from it.

Chapter List
- 36
- 37
- 38
Back across the hall, Snape found Remus still staring into the dying fire.
“How is Teddy doing?” Lupin asked, looking over at him.
“He’s sleeping now. He did end up using the loo and drinking his potion,” Severus said.
“Thank you, sir. I can’t wait until I’m able to do more of this myself, you shouldn’t have to be the one doing everything for him all of the time.”
Severus set the goblet down on his night stand and went back over to the fire. “If I’m being honest with both of us, I rather like it.”
“You do?” Remus blurted.
Snape nodded. “He’s a unique child, I’m glad to spend the time with him.” He levitated the chair over by the bed. “Would you like to try a few steps again tonight?”
“Maybe not tonight; my head is spinning a little.” It was the truth; he only hoped Snape would accept his lack of enthusiasm for the idea.
“You Gryffindors never could hold your liquor,” Severus smirked, moving the chair nearer to Remus’ side of the bed and helping him into some proper sleeping attire before levitating him into it. “Therefore we’ll get settled, but I want to wait a while longer before giving you your dose of Wolfsbane.”
Severus changed as well, opting for a loose pair of pants and nothing else to sleep in. He climbed into his side of the bed, dimming the lights a little and getting comfortable.
“That’s okay; there was something I wanted to talk to you about anyway,” Remus forced himself to start.
“Alright,” Snape said, rolling over to face him, “what is it?”
“You and Sebastian seem to get along very well,” Remus began.
Severus gave him a strange look. “Yes, with all of the work that needed to be done since I took this place over, he and I did end up spending quite a lot of time together.”
“That is part of what I mean, I suppose,” Remus said. “I also mean that you seem to have a good chemistry together, and he obviously finds you attractive.”
“I think you’re mistaking his penchant for jest for something entirely different,” Severus said, an eyebrow quirked. “Nothing has ever happened between us, if that is what you’re hinting at.”
“Kind of, but not really; I’m suggesting that you… see if something could happen between you. I bet you’d find him far more interested than you think. You’re a Slytherin, you should take advantage of an opportunity that is presenting itself to you.” Remus felt like he was bungling this up more than usual. He had to find a way to get his point across in a way that was appealing to Severus, except, what would sound appealing to a man like him?
Severus blinked at him. Where in the hell had any of this come from? “Let me get this straight. You want me to pursue a relationship with Sebastian because…” he began. How intoxicated was Remus? “…because we can get along for a couple of hours and you assume he is interested in me?” He tried to keep the sarcasm out of his voice, he really did.
“Not entirely,” Remus started. “When you say it like that it sounds-”
“Preposterous?” Severus suggested. It was the first word his mind had supplied, anyway.
Remus deflated. “Maybe a little. What I’m trying to say is that you deserve to be happy. You worked for a long time to make things right in your life; you shouldn’t let one second-rate werewolf stand in the way of something you struggled so hard to have. You’re entitled to more in your life than that, sir.”
Severus took a minute to process what Remus was saying. There was an interesting contradiction happening here: the calmness of Lupin’s words and the fact that his body language was practically crying discomfort. What exactly had Remus thought he’d ‘struggled so hard’ for: the freedom to love or some other such poppycock? Not bloody likely. He hadn’t expected to still be drawing breath after the end of the war, never mind living a life for himself, mostly free of other people’s power and expectations. He already had more than he’d ever dreamed he would, asking for anything more just seemed obscene.
Or was Remus trying to get out of the physical aspect of the bond? He hated to disappoint the other man, but there was no way he knew of to do that permanently. “You do realize that, even if I was interested in or able to find a suitable companion, it would not change the requirements of the bond you and I share, correct?”
“Of course I know that,” Remus protested, withdrawing more still. “That isn’t what I’m talking about at all. I know you’ll do your duty to me and our bond, sir. I’m just saying that you should have someone to be there for you, who can stand at your side as an equal.”
“You are my equal, Remus. That aside, I don’t understand why you are proposing something that is clearly so upsetting to you,” Severus stated. ‘Do his duty’? Remus made it sound like he was a card to be punched at the beginning and end of a shift.
“I’m not upset,” Remus protested. His heart was beating more quickly; was it because his master and he were having a disagreement or because the way Severus had said that made it sound like he wouldn’t mind him standing by his side?
“No? Your breathing is accelerated, you’re pulling away from me and you haven’t looked at my face for the entirety of this conversation.”
Remus was quiet for a time before conceding, “Maybe I am a little upset. That doesn’t mean what I’m saying isn’t valid.”
“Perhaps not, but it is completely unnecessary for several reasons.”
“Such as?” Remus asked, rather glad he was intoxicated for this conversation, which was definitely not going as planned
“Such as the fact that I have been alone for most of my life, and other than allowing a ‘second-rate werewolf’ into my home, I more than likely plan on keeping it that way. Sebastian and I have had plenty of time to… well, whatever it is you’re implying we should do, and nothing has ever come of it. Also, was I to find this fantasy suitor, and if he was by some miracle, also interested in me, I wouldn’t pursue it anyway, just on principle.”
“But why not?” Remus asked, clearly bothered by the idea.
“Among other reasons, because I will not dishonor you or the bond we share by taking another lover,” Severus explained, closing the distance that Lupin had slowly been creating between them, placing a hand on his waist for emphasis.
“You can’t possibly mean that,” Remus said. “Your actions aren’t restricted by the bond; I’m here for you, to give you what you need, whatever that is.”
Lupin was getting frustrated, that much was obvious. Snape wasn’t exactly sure what he could say that would end this conversation. “And I’m here for you. If I spent all of my time, attention and the little bit of affection I am capable of on some other person, I would have nothing left to give to you.”
“That isn’t how it works!” Remus said a little more loudly than he’d intended. Just perfect! For the cherry on top, he’d shout at his master and just see where that got him!
“Perhaps that is not how it used to work, with you and Walden,” Severus said, not letting on how much Remus’ raised voice had startled him. ”Our bond is very different, I know you understand that. Whatever the magic actually demands of me, I will do what I know to be right.” He’d ignored what was right far too much of his life already, he’d not continue to do so now that he was free; or as ‘free’ as he’d ever been, at any rate. “And that means I will be faithful to this bond, which in turn means that I will be faithful to you.”
It was Remus’ turn to blink at Snape. “But sir…”
“No,” Severus said with finality. “I have already betrayed and destroyed two bonds in my life. I’m astounded there was enough of my spirit left for the magic to tie to yours successfully. I have no desire to defile the shreds of my soul any more than they already have been. You are bound to me, and I to you. Reciprocity is the only way to go about this, as far as I can see.”
Remus felt slightly chastened. “I didn’t know you felt that way.” As he said it he realized that Snape had said something similar to him before; that he’d been saying almost the entire time, in one way or another. The question was: was he prepared to finally believe him?
“Well I do,” Severus said in a low voice. “No matter how you feel in the aftermath of what has been done to you, you have and will always have innate worth. I kept that in the forefront of my mind when you first came here, and since then I have discovered that your worth far surpasses that. I imagine that the longer I know you, the clearer that will become.”
“Sir, please don’t-“
“Don’t what? Attempt to correct your views of your significance here? You seem to be under the impression that you are tolerated here, but only just. That isn’t the case. When I brought you and Teddy here, I did it with the full knowledge and intent that this would be your home until something changed. I thought that I would have to endure your presence, but have since discovered that I was mistaken in that. I don’t usually speak so freely about such things, but I find your presence to be quite amiable.”
‘Quite amiable’; from anyone else that would be a lackluster review. From Severus Snape it was practically a glowing commendation. He was still at what amounted to a complete loss for words. “Severus, you don’t have to… overestimate the agreeability of us being here.”
“When have you ever known me to overestimate the agreeability of anything? I’ll more than likely only say this once, Remus, but I am surprised at how much I find myself enjoying your company.”
“Th- thank you, sir,” Remus started, “but…”
“But what?” Severus interrupted again, having grown tired of this conversation a while ago. “I think that in your eagerness to anticipate complications, you are creating them. This I will say as many times as you need to hear: we are in this together, Remus. This is ultimately a partnership, which means if you are for me, then I am for you and I will do all I can to live up to that. Despite what we both know about my nature, I do have the capacity to be loyal; know that while you are both bonded to me, that is what I will strive to be to you and your son. Only so much can be conveyed in words, but if you give me the time, I will prove it to you.”
Remus saw his own impending doom in the distance as he glanced up into Snape’s dark eyes and saw his absolute sincerity. The reason for his jealousy from earlier suddenly became clear to him: he was falling for Severus. His master’s hand was on his hip, partly on his slacks and partly on his skin, his fingers gripping him slightly. He looked down immediately so the expression on his face wouldn’t give him away. How had this happened? He decided it was no wonder, what with the way Severus had treated him since his arrival here, with the way he was speaking to him now.
“This is the point in the conversation where you say something in return,” Severus said, no anger in his voice.
“I don’t know what to say,” Remus admitted forlornly.
“Alright, in that case ‘nothing’ will be acceptable.” Snape moved his hand off of Remus’ side and brought it up to run his fingers through his sandy hair, curling them around the back of the lycanthrope’s neck. Remus seemed to be settled, or at least at a loss for words; both of these things made him a little nervous because either could mean he’d said too much.
“It doesn’t feel that way,” Remus said, making eye contact again. Snape’s fingers were cool on the back of his neck, they moved back and forth, soothing and distracting him simultaneously.
“I get the impression you think that nothing you do is acceptable,” Severus said, his thumb stroking the place just under Remus’ ear, fingers still cupping the back of his neck, “that you yourself are unacceptable. I can only imagine that Macnair strove to make you believe that was true in whatever ways he was able.” He turned away to grab the salve for Remus’ scars, reached out until he found the container on the nightstand and then rolled back.
“I’m sorry, sir,” Remus sighed.
“Don’t be; it isn’t your fault. I wasn’t attempting to accuse you of anything, I just wanted you to know that I don’t find that to be true at all.” Severus unscrewed the lid on the container. “Lay on your stomach? I’d like to apply some more of this salve tonight.”
Remus did as he was asked. This entire conversation hadn’t gone as he’d thought it would. He felt Snape pull the blankets down and begin applying the potion to his back. He was at a total loss. Severus seemed to be sincere, but how could that really be possible? Everything he thought he knew about the man said that Snape should be enduring them at best, not enjoying their company. He should want a way out of this partnership, not be talking about faithfulness and loyalty; not trying to reassure him or make him feel wanted.
“You’re still so tense,” Severus noted, hands roaming Lupin’s back. “Try to relax, this will feel much better if you do.” He didn’t need to peer into the other man’s mind to know that he was feeling anxious.
Remus took a deep breath, held it and then let it out slowly.
“That’s a little better,” Severus told him. He took his fingers and worked the salve over the long puckered tendrils of scar tissue on Remus’ shoulder. It was more than likely the infection site for his lycanthropy and though the salve wouldn’t reduce the appearance of it at all, it would probably help with tightness and mobility. He cast the protection charm over Lupin’s back. “Would you turn over for me?”
Remus did as he was asked again. Now he had little choice but to close his eyes or to meet his master’s. Glancing up nervously he found Severus already looking at him.
“If your only value was what you could give to me or what I could take from you, do you think I would spend so much time focused on making you well?” Severus asked without sarcasm as he began to work carefully away at the scars on Remus’ chest, paying attention to each one he came across. “Do you think I would care so much about the level of comfort you are in or if you were satisfied with the bond I selected for your son?” His hands continued their steady work, making sure that every bit of potion was being worked into the skin.
“I don’t think so,” Remus allowed, having closed his eyes after Snape’s first question. “It just feels unreal. What have I ever done to make you care about any of those things in relation to me? I hadn’t seen you in years and then one day I wake up half dead in your guest room and everything has changed.” He could understand and see that Severus was a changed man, but the scope of that change seemed too vast to be real.
“That’s one way to put it,” Severus smirked. “I had come to the realization some time ago that if I let go of our youth, there was nearly a clean slate between us; and now we are writing something in the place of what was wiped away. That does not mean, however, that we will get through this without difficulty, but we will get through it, and we will do it together.” Or Remus would choose to leave. That hadn’t been brought up in quite some time and he felt rather reluctant to mention it.
Remus wasn’t sure what to say to that; Severus seemed to be striking him speechless far too often. He felt something swell inside of him that was halfway between fear and love, praying to any god that his master was being truthful. Snape already had him in the palm of his hand, if he knew it or not, but whether his goal in the end was to squish or uplift him would only be seen later. Though he was beginning to accept that this was reality – that there may not be some sinister plot just waiting to ensnare him, and the thought frightened him less and less as the days wore on.
When Snape was done he moved to apply the salve to Remus’ feet as well, coating them thickly and casting the protection spell. He set the jar back on the nightstand and spelled his hands clean.
As Severus was moving around, Remus couldn’t help but notice that the bandage on Snape’s shoulder seemed to be yellowing slightly. “Sir?”
“Yes, Remus?” Severus replied, sitting back on the edge of his side of the bed.
“When was the last time you looked at your shoulder?”
Snape looked briefly surprised. “I don’t believe I have since you changed the bandage.”
“That was days ago!” Remus protested.
“Yes, I do believe it was. Whatever is going on under there will keep for the night. I’ll see to it in the morning,” Snape said, moving to lie down.
Remus sat up a little. “Why not see to it now? Let the potions do their job while you rest, sir.”
It was Snape’s turn to sigh. He sat cross legged on the bed and began to unwind the bandage from around his arm and shoulder. He banished the soiled linens and craned his head to survey the damage. The burn was red and inflamed and had a little discoloration that could imply infection.
“See? It isn’t all that bad,” Severus said. He picked up a bottle from the nightstand and doused some linen from the drawer, dabbing the potion sopped cloth onto the wound.
Remus could hear it sizzle from where he was laying, feeling a shiver go through him at the sound. Severus’ face didn’t even twitch as he watched it do its work. Sure, it wasn’t badly infected right now, but he wondered how long Snape would have left it if he hadn’t said anything. He watched his master rewrap the injury with practiced skill.
“You’re right,” Remus conceded, “but thank you for checking all the same.”
Severus leaned back against the headboard. Having someone fuss over him like this, even a little, brought with it an interesting sensation that he hadn’t felt since before Albus had died. Before he had killed him, he should amend that thought.
“You should take your Wolfsbane now,” Severus said. It wasn’t exactly what he would have liked to say, but he was already feeling overly saccharine from their previous conversation, so it would have to do.
Remus struggled to sit up by himself, leaning back against the headboard as Severus was doing. He was breathing a little heavily, but not as bad as after previous attempts.
Severus removed the stasis spell from the goblet and handed it to Lupin, who emptied it as fast as possible, making an exaggerated shudder as he handed the vessel back to him. He set the cup aside, turning and getting back under the blankets and helping Remus to do the same.
They took a moment to get comfortable, Snape curling his arm around Lupin’s middle, his lips found the other man’s shoulder briefly. “It’s been a long day,” he said.
“It certainly has,” Remus agreed. It was hard to believe all that had transpired since they got out of bed this morning. He shut his eyes, reveling in the closeness they shared. Somehow this wiped away the stress of earlier, made him even more able to relax. Severus was right; only time would tell if he was being sincere or not. He certainly appeared to be, but Remus was sure that was what Voldemort had thought right up to the end as well. He decided to tentatively trust this reality, and if it all came crashing down later, so be it – at least he would have had this time to recharge.
“Goodnight, Remus,” Severus said, tracing his fingers between scars on Remus’ stomach.
“Goodnight,” Remus exhaled, finding himself already beginning to tire.
The grey light of an overcast day met Severus when he woke the next morning.
Remus was lying with his back towards him, their legs were intertwined, hips together and Snape’s arm over top of him. The morning rays caught the silvers in Remus’ hair, but even with that he looked younger than he had since his arrival as he raised his head to sneak a look at his face. Severus was reluctant to disrupt his peacefulness, so for a few moments he just lay there allowing himself to enjoy the simplicity of this in the midst of the complications of everything else.
He mustn’t have been as stealthy as he thought, because it didn’t take Remus long to begin to stir in his arms. The other man seemed to try to cling to sleep, snuggling further under the blankets and closer to the warmth that was Snape’s own body. Despite all of this he sighed and his eyes fluttered open, blinking rapidly against the onslaught of light.
Severus gave into an urge and placed a kiss on the crux of Lupin’s neck.
Remus looked momentarily startled, before turning a bleary and crooked smile on Snape, who found it to be quite endearing. “Good morning, Severus.”
Snape felt a ripple go down his spine, looking into those amber eyes as Remus rolled over to face him. “Yes, it is,” he replied seriously.
Remus blushed and attempted to wake up a little more. He listened, hearing distantly the small patter of rain on the roof. He felt reluctant to move, wanting this closeness, however feigned it may be on Snape’s part, to last as long as it could.
“Your scars are starting to look very improved,” Severus pointed out, trailing his index finger down what had been one of the more severe sections of burn on his chest.
“Yes, they’re definitely fading,” Remus said, glad it was the truth. Every time he looked at those patches of pocked, puckered skin he remembered the curse engulfing him, weeks of fever and delirium and unending pain at the auction house and before, when Macnair was still too angry to tend to him.
“I’m going to apply that potion again this morning. We should get a few more treatments out of it before it has done all that it can do; I’d like to maximize the results as much as possible. The more we can diminish these marks, the greater the range of motion you will have at the end of all this. Once our present treatment is done, there is another we can do to help alleviate any residual stiffness.”
“You really do want to see me back up and running,” Remus mused, almost marveling to himself. He suddenly felt completely unworthy of such time, effort, money and planning.
“Now you’re starting to catch on,” Severus smiled. He knew it would take Remus a long while to become truly relaxed into this new life, if he chose to stay here. That they had managed to make this much headway in such a short while gave him hope that Remus might bounce more completely back with time than he had previously anticipated. Where it had driven him near mad before, now he found himself wondering if the Lupin who used to laugh so freely would ever do so again.
“I’m slow, but I’ve been told I’m worth waiting for,” Remus chuckled.
“Oh, I’m certain you are,” Severus said into his ear, a wicked little smirk on his lips. He didn’t wait for Remus to reply, pulling away from him slightly and taking the salve in hand. He pulled the covers back and applied it as he had the night before, to all of the uneven scars on Remus’ torso and feet.
Remus was glad he didn’t have to say anything back to that. He lay there and allowed Severus to see to his body, soaking in the soft touches much as he did every time. When the treatments had accomplished all they could, he thought that he might actually miss this, though he was sure the benefits of being healed would far outweigh his disappointment.
Severus capped the potion and put it back on the nightstand. He stood, stretched and dressed himself swiftly, tucking his used clothing into the hamper. Then he came around to Lupin’s side of the bed and helped him to sit up and swing his legs over the edge of the mattress.
“I’d like to help you walk to your chair,” Severus told him.
“I was afraid you’d say that.” Remus sighed. “Okay, let’s do this then.”
Snape supported him much the same as he had the other day, helping him to his feet and waiting for him to become steady. When Remus appeared to be standing as upright as he was going to get, Snape made sure to keep an arm secured around his middle and helped propel him forward, slowly enough that Remus could shuffle his feet along with the momentum.
Lupin had done slightly better than the time before, though turning to help him sit was as challenging as always. Snape lowered him lightly to the cushion, trying not to take all of the other man’s weight on himself and yet attempting to allow Remus no more than he could handle. Even with the short exertion the sandy haired man looked like he’d been put through a bit of a wringer. It was a good thing that he could manage the other man’s body even if he were total dead weight.
Giving Remus a moment to collect himself, Snape crossed the room and gathered some clothing for him to wear, returning and helping the other man change without the use of magic. Remus was required to do a lot more work than he’d had to previously that way. From here on out it was all about strengthening the lycanthrope and any little bit counted.
Severus levitated the chair out into the hall, pausing to push Teddy’s door all of the way open. The bed hadn’t been turned back and there was a small lump in the middle of it. He set down the chair just outside of the doorway.
“He’s still sleeping?” Remus asked, a little concerned.
“The effects of that potion are slow to wear off,” Severus said. “He’s definitely slept long enough though, so I’ll go wake him.”
Severus walked into the room, going up to the bed and kneeling beside it so he wouldn’t be towering over Teddy when he first woke up. It was easy to be disoriented at such times and he didn’t want the child to be frightened first thing in the morning.
He set his hand on the boy’s arm and shook it very lightly. “Teddy? Wake up, child,” he said.
Teddy rustled his small legs and arms, his head flying off of the pillow as he looked up above himself for someone who wasn’t there.
“Hello,” Severus said.
Teddy’s eyes darted down, the panic melting off his face as he saw Snape. “Morning, sir,” he said, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand. He sat up on his elbow, yawning.
“How do you feel today?”
Teddy thought about it. “Better than yesterday.”
“And your head?” Severus continued, “Does it still spin?”
“Maybe just a little,” Teddy allowed.
“It should feel better after we get some food into you.”
“Breakfast?” Teddy asked hopefully.
“That’s certainly what I was thinking.”
“Okay,” Teddy said, climbing out of bed in a hurry.
“Why don’t you get changed and I’ll take your father downstairs and start something?”
“Sounds great,” Teddy grinned, going over to his dresser and selecting a set of clean clothes to put on. “Good morning, dad,” he said as he walked past the doorway.
“Good morning to you too, Teddy,” Remus replied. It was still a wondrous thing to him, to see his son smiling and moving around with such confidence.
Severus had stood and went back into the hall, levitating the chair and walking him and Remus into the kitchen. He set Lupin at the table and started making breakfast. Usually, Fred did most of the cooking and he took care of the plants in the garden and greenhouse. Since the Lupins had come, they’d had a little bit of role reversal, which seemed fairly refreshing for both of them. Over time, things would become more normal again, but until then they would adapt just fine.
As it was, he quickly put on a pot of coffee and set out to make something for them to eat. He decided to go through the simple steps to make French toast and sausages, rinsing and slicing some fruit and berries from the cold box as well. It would be a heavy breakfast but both Remus and Teddy could do with a little fattening up. He set some syrup and milk on the table, waiting the last little bit for the sausages to cook before assembling three plates and taking them over to the table as well as a cup of coffee for Remus and himself.
Sometime during his preparations, Teddy and his dragon had come downstairs and sat beside his father. He looked delighted when Severus set his plate in front of him. Two layers of thick eggy bread covered with a dollop of whip cream and sprinkled with berries was the main focus, a small pile of sausages sitting beside it all.
“Thank you sir,” Teddy said, popping a blackberry into his mouth.
“You’re welcome,” Severus replied, taking the lid off of the syrup and pouring some over Teddy’s toast. He passed the bottle to Remus, who nodded and poured a portion on his plate as well.
Snape sliced a tomato, arranging that over his toast in the place of the overly sweet syrup that the other two were consuming.
After they were done eating, Teddy assisted him with the dishes again while Remus drank another cup of coffee. Snape filled his own cup again and sat at the table. He decided it was best to get to the point.
“Today we are going to begin a series of stretches and exercises that will help you become mobile again,” he said to Remus.
Lupin’s eyebrows rose. “I’d assumed you’d just give me a potion.”
“I wish I could,” Severus said. “Unfortunately in this case there is no proper substitute for hard work. There are potions I will give you that will aid in the process, but for real progress and lasting results, time and energy must be expended.”
“Do I get to help?” Teddy asked from across the table.
“I don’t know that there would be very much for you to do,” Severus told him. “While your father and I are doing that in the other room, how would you feel about practicing more of your letters?”
“Okay!” Teddy agreed. “I’ll go get my book!” He jumped off his chair and ran out of the room.
“He’s way too excited about that,” Remus said shaking his head, though a smile played at his lips.
“It’ll wear off with time.” About the time the child turned eleven, if his experiences held true. “For now I will start getting things set up in the living room. Today will be very light, but with time we will move up to more difficult things and longer durations. The idea is to work you hard enough that you’re pushing yourself but not so hard as to cause further strain or injury.”
“Okay, what do you need me to do?”
“Nothing right now except digest; I have a few things to prepare and then we’ll get started.”
Severus stood, moving Remus with him into the other room. He set him beside the couch and went back into the kitchen briefly. Teddy went past him as he came back into the room with a large canvas bag strapped over his shoulder. The boy gave him a confused look but continued on, his books and pencils held under his arm.
“Oh my, what do you have in there?” Remus asked, not being able to help himself.
Snape set the bag down by Lupin’s chair. “A variety of things. Fred has been accumulating them since your arrival; I made him a list of equipment I believed would be necessary for your recovery when we saw the state you were in the night you came here.” From inside the bag Severus pulled a large, spongey looking mat and a couple of small weights. “For today, I can’t see us needing more than these. We will more than likely work at stretching and very basic strengthening for a while before we move on to too much else.”
“That sounds reasonable,” Remus said, looking at the equipment with a small amount of trepidation.
“Good,” Severus replied. He rolled the mat out on the ground and levitated Remus onto it so that he was lying on his back. “I think the descent from standing to laying on the mat would be a little much for our present stage of progression.”
“I think we could both agree on that one, sir.”
“Think of the few times we’ve had you up and about; what was the most troubling thing to you, other than muscle weakness and instability?”
Remus paused to think. “My feet.”
“How so?” Severus pressed, sitting down on the floor beside the horizontal man.
“Well, they hurt, sir. When I set them flat on the floor and put my weight on them, even the portion of it you weren’t carrying, they felt very tight. As I walked, the motion of them bending as they normally used to was… unpleasant.”
“That is one of the areas we will work on then. Know that, at least at first, even if your musculature was in very good condition you would still have limited mobility because of the scarring and amount of magically regenerated tissue. Not to say that you will never have that range of motion again, just that it will take some work to get there.”
“What do you need me to do, sir?” Remus asked for a second time.
“Just lay back and breathe evenly,” Snape instructed. He took one of Lupin’s feet in his hands and began to flex in back and forth, seeing what movement the muscles and tendons would currently allow. It wasn’t as bad as he had feared, though not as good as he had secretly been hoping.
He took a potion from out of the bag as well as a few pieces of heavy cotton, uncapping the bottle and pouring it onto the swab. He set everything but the drenched cotton aside, swabbing the cotton over Remus’ left foot, mindful to get it on the whole surface. Banishing the cotton balls, he set to work right away.
“I need you to tell me if any of this hurts or feels like I’m going too far.”
Remus raised his head off of the mat to see what Severus was doing. He saw the dark haired man sitting cross legged on the floor holding his left foot in his lap. Severus folded his hands about the foot so that his thumbs were on the underside of it and his fingers were holding the top. Lupin let his head fall back; Severus hadn’t put him in any real discomfort yet but he was still wary, especially with the warning he’d been given. Maybe he didn’t want to see what was going to happen after all.
He felt Snape take his palm and place it underneath the row of his toes. He then pushed up carefully so that his foot would curl upwards. Immediately there was the sensation of tightness, he took a gasp of breath, holding it for the length of time Snape held his foot in that position.
“Is this too much?” Severus asked. When Remus didn’t answer he released the stretch.
“Define ‘too much’ for me?”
“A small amount of discomfort is to be expected; if the pain is sharp or very sudden, please say so at once.”
Severus allowed the muscle to relax for a moment and then moved the foot back into the position of tightness. He nodded, though Remus couldn’t see him from the position he was in. He continued to alternate between taut and loose for a while before deciding that was enough for the time being.
He began to slide his thumbs along the underside of Remus’ foot. It was still slick with the potion he’d applied earlier; this he would work into the skin while applying pressure to the muscles, allowing it to be absorbed more deeply into the tissue. In the end, it would help elasticity and bring Remus just a little closer to being as fit as he used to be. The same solution had worked wonders on his hand in the days, weeks and months after it had been regrown. He would still apply it and work it in himself if he was having enough pain, say with the changing of the seasons.
Remus closed his eyes, allowing the rest of his body to sink back into the mat. After the stretching, which had been well within his threshold for pain, Severus seemed to want to massage the appendage he was holding. He didn’t know much about his master’s reasoning, but he did know without a doubt that what he was doing felt incredible. He gave a sigh of what could only be called relief. It didn’t feel like the ‘work’ that Severus had been talking about earlier, but that could come in time – all he intended to do at the moment was lay back and allow himself to ride the sensations.
Severus went over each of Remus’ toes individually, flexing them and moving the joints. Everything was in the details and he wanted to be sure that the magic had done a thorough job of reconstructing Lupin’s body when the bond healed him. It all seemed to be in order, so he carefully set the foot aside and took up the other one, placing it in his lap to recollect the potion and a fresh bunch of cotton from where he had set them.
As Snape began to go over the exact same process with his right foot as he had with his left, Remus felt like he might laugh. Here he was getting a foot massage while Teddy practiced writing his alphabet in the kitchen. The absolute improbability of his situation still weighed heavily on his mind, though more and more he tried to ignore it and just accept what was happening.
When that foot had been seen to as well, Severus moved up to the calves and thighs, glad that he had put Remus in such a loose fitting pair of slacks. They worked his arms, shoulders neck and back next, spreading each area with the potion before the stretch. Severus would always pause to work the potion into the skin after each muscle group was completed.
“That wasn’t so bad,” Remus said. Overall, he felt quite a bit better than he had before they’d started doing this, and it was only the first time.
“That, I’m afraid,” Severus drawled, “was the easy part.”
About hour later, Remus knew that Severus hadn’t been lying to him.
Strength training was to come after the stretching and massage. Severus had him lift those damned weights, no matter how light they were, from almost every conceivable position. They had worked on his legs without additional weight (only for the moment, Severus had warned him). For that he was grateful, because it really had been some time since he’d been able to use them in any significant way. He had discovered a little more just how weak they had become with every position Snape made him hold and release. His core body had been worked as well, for as long as he could handle. He lay there now, sweating and panting on the floor next to a much more composed Snape.
“I think that is enough for our first time, don’t you?” Severus asked him.
“Yes, please, sir,” Remus puffed.
“I’ll assist you with another round of mild stretches and we will be finished,” he said, doing just that.
Remus was glad that all he was expected to do was breathe and count aloud while Severus held his body in various poses that would cause his muscles to pull tight. It was disheartening to think that he had been so tired out by such a small bout of exercise, but he knew he wouldn’t have been able to do a single thing more if someone had put him under the Imperious and commanded him to. Severus didn’t seem to mind though; he just kept on calmly and thoroughly as he had before.
When they were completed, Snape packed everything they were finished with back into the bag. Remus lay on the floor, glad that he most likely wouldn’t be asked to try and stand up for himself.
Severus zipped up the bag and levitated Remus back into his chair.
“I somehow thought I’d be able to do more than that,” Remus admitted to the momentary quiet in the room.
“In my opinion your advancement was more than acceptable,” Severus said. He spelled the mat clean and rolled it up, tucking it into the handles of the bag and setting everything off to the side. “In fact you are already farther along than I had thought you would be in many ways; the rest will come with time.”
Remus sighed and leaned his head against the back of his chair.
“Teddy’s been in there a while, I’m going to go see how he is doing and then I’ll take you upstairs to get cleaned up.”
“Alright,” Remus replied. What else could he say? It wasn’t like he was going anywhere on his own. He didn’t feel he had the strength even to blink at this exact point in time.
Snape went into the kitchen, where he found Teddy still sitting at the table, book and papers spread out before him. He looked up when he heard Severus enter.
“Hello sir, how’s it going in there?” he asked.
“We’re all finished now. You’re still practicing your printing?”
“Well I was until a while ago,” Teddy said, “now the book is telling me words that start with the letters I write!”
“That’s impressive, Teddy; that must mean you’re making some very nice letters. As you improve the book will continue to advance along with you.”
“That means I’m doing better?” Teddy asked hopefully.
“Yes, it does. Here, let me see,” Severus said, holding out his hand. Teddy handed him a few of the sheets, which he brought closer to inspect.
The letters were still a little shaky, but more than legible. As he shuffled through the papers, the letters became even clearer. He found himself impressed that this child had devoted so much time to the form and size of his printing; the rows of repeated letters even began to go straight across the unlined pages as he flipped through. There was no question that Teddy had taken his time with these.
“This is excellent work, Teddy,” he said with both eyebrows raised. The aptitude this child expressed when given half the chance was astounding. He lowered the papers and set them neatly back on the table. “I’m very impressed that you’ve come so far in such a short while.
Teddy’s smile nearly split his face as he turned his head away to hide it.
“I’m going to take your father upstairs to get cleaned up after his exercises now.”
“Does that mean you want me to stop practicing?” the boy sounded disappointed.
“No, if you wish, you may continue,” Severus said.
“Okay, thank you sir,” Teddy beamed.
Snape shook his head, going over and getting a cool glass of water of Remus to drink.
“If you need anything, we’ll just be upstairs,” Severus said.
“Sounds good, sir,” Teddy said, not even looking up from the book, whose magical voice was telling him that ‘C was for cat’.
He went back into the living room, finding Remus still leaning his head against the back of his chair, eyes closed.
“Here, drink this,” he said, holding the glass out and waiting for Lupin to respond.
Remus gave a start, looking at the water with an expression of relief on his face. He accepted the glass and drank two thirds of it in one go.
“Thank you, sir,” he said before draining the glass and handing it back to Snape.
Severus set the cup on the short table in the middle of the room. He returned at levitated Remus’ chair, taking both of them up the stairs, through his chambers and into the bathroom. He set Remus down and began to run a hot bath. The usual potions to aid Lupin’s sore and worn out body were added.
“I don’t know that I’ll be able to stay awake through this,” Remus warned.
“I didn’t really expect you to,” Severus said. He helped Remus out of his damp clothes and into the tub. He wasn’t surprised to see the other man’s eyes close again as soon as he was submerged. He charmed Lupin so that he wouldn’t drown himself and set about gathering what he would need to wash his hair and body.
The hair and scalp received a basic wash and rinse. The rest of Remus body was more diligently washed; Severus took his time lathering and scrubbing him. Though he was more than likely strong enough to do it himself, he appeared to be too exhausted. Snape understood, the first few sessions would probably wear Remus totally out.
Remus lay there the entire time. His eyes were closed, his body relaxed. The fact that there was no anxiety coursing through him even though his master’s hands were flowing freely across his body felt faintly surprising to him. He’d been more relaxed with Severus than he had ever imagined himself capable of being with anyone again. He was half asleep when he heard the tub being drained, felt himself being floated from its basin and dried carefully with a towel. He woke a little while Severus dressed him, fading out again at some point.
Remus was barely responsive while Snape dried and dressed him. He decided that a short nap would do the other man well, so he took him and lay him down on the bed, covering him with a quilt and leaving him to sleep. He would go see how Teddy was faring and attend to a couple of things down in the lab. It wouldn’t be prudent to let Lupin sleep for too long, however, so he would come back up shortly to rouse him.
Teddy was still working diligently away in the kitchen. He told the boy that they would be spending the afternoon in the lab once his father was up from his rest, and that there were a couple of things he would like to see to down there before that time. Teddy was happy to keep working away, which concerned Severus only slightly.
He descended the stairs, door falling shut behind him.
Interestingly enough, what he hoped to work on down here wasn’t potions work or prep, but the completion of a fancy bit of Charms work.
A/N: Here is another update! (Finally!) Sorry I didn’t get this to you in time to be a Christmas present! My grandfather passed away at the end of last month, so I didn’t find myself with much time to spend on this story.
Hope you like it and are still reading! More to come, again, I’ll do my best to get it to you in a way more timely fashion! Please let me know what you thought of this one though, your reviews and ratings mean the world to me!
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The Long Road