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Amore et Amicitia	By : Kimmimaru Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Sirius/James Views: 6683 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters or settings by JK Rowling. I make no profit from this story.

Chapter List
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AN: Yes, the Yaxley in this is the same Yaxley in the HP books, getting bored of making up random OC’s so I used him. :p

Chapter Thirty-Nine: Vita, animo nos mutuo (My life, your heart, our bond)

The voice was male, low and rough and Sirius frowned slightly as hands dipped into his pockets and withdrew his wand, he slowly lifted his hands one with his cigarette still between his fingers. “No idea but that breath has a familiar stink to it...Luther Yaxley...” Sirius said softly and smirked.

Yaxley chuckled softly before slipping his hands away from Sirius’ eyes, he grabbed his hair and forced him forwards and down the stairs. Sirius stumbled slightly and winced. “Stop being pathetic, I heard you like it rough, Black.”

Sirius chuckled as he was forced to his knees in the wet grass. “So I do...but I appear to be lacking the boner I normally get...maybe its your face, Yaxley? You’re putting me off. Perhaps you’d better put a bag on your head.” He smirked as his head was forced into the dirt.

“Shut your mouth or I’ll gag you.” Yaxley hissed. “Your brother’s told us all the truth...”

“And what is that exactly?” Sirius muttered.

“That you’re a filthy Queer...You take it up the arse and that Potter likes to give it to you.”

“Well done. You appear to have worked out what most of the school has already worked out...I honestly don’t know how you’re going to cope with your NEWTS this year.” Sirius winced as a boot was pressed to the back of his head, he tasted dirt and spat to clear his mouth. “Except you got one thing wrong, mate.”

“I’m not your mate!”

“...James is straight...He wouldn’t touch me unless I had breasts and a vagina...Trust me, I’ve tried...ow!” Sirius felt hairs part with his scalp as he was yanked backwards so he was gazing up at the stars. Someone laughed to his left, he felt a hand on his wrist as someone slipped off one of his bracelet’s.

“Look at this! He’s wearing jewellery like a girl! Next thing he’ll be putting on makeup and wearing skirts...”

“In your dreams, Rosier. I know you’d like to see me in a dress but it’s not happening.” Sirius grinned, revealing his teeth.

“Fuck off, I’m not bent!” Rosier snapped furiously.

“What are you talking about? You’re so far in the closet you can’t see through all the robes!” Sirius got a punch in the stomach for that, he gasped and doubled over as he was released. He coughed slightly and caught his breath.

“Bastard! How dare you talk to me like that, fucking Bloodtraitor scum!”

“Calm down Rosier, he’ll soon regret speaking.” Yaxley smiled to himself as he looked at Sirius. “The Dark Lord will sort him out, I’m certain of it. All Bloodtraitors will be destroyed, especially filth like you.”

“What makes you say that? I can look after myself, I have done since I was a kid. I’m not afraid of the Dark Lord!”

Yaxley grabbed a handful of Sirius’ hair, he knelt beside him and whispered in his ear. “Oh you will be...I’ve seen what he can do, you’ve read the papers...he’s on the rise and soon he will take over the Ministry and when he does we’ll be at his side and I will have the pleasure of destroying you.” Sirius’ breathing hitched in his chest as Yaxley reached down between his legs, he gripped his balls tightly and made Sirius jerk in pain. “And I’ll make you watch as I cut off your friend’s dick, I’ll let you listen to his screams as I fuck him with it.” He grinned nastily as Sirius closed his eyes.

“James is stronger than you give him credit for...he’d kick your arses and not even break a sweat. You don’t even know...you can’t even guess just how strong he is...” Sirius muttered, he was panting slightly, Yaxley’s hand had relaxed its grip slightly but he was surreptitiously massaging his penis and he could feel himself growing hard beneath his ministrations. He bit down on his lip against a groan, he had to force his body still as he let his head fall forward. “He’s my b-best...my best friend...I’d d-die for him...”

“And you will get your chance...” Yaxley whispered, tightening his grip on Sirius’ prominent erection and making him tremble. He smirked to himself, watching Sirius’ face intently. “You can die for him or with him if you want but not until I’ve had my way with you...”

Sirius tensed, his fingers curling into fists as he fought for control over his hormones. Yaxley was so close he could smell his breath on his face, he could feel his breathing heavily against his throat and he shivered. A soft moan escaped his throat and he closed his eyes. “Shit...” He breathed. “Get...get your...hands o-off of me...”

“Hush...” Yaxley whispered, his eyes glittering in the dark as he felt Sirius shuddering beneath his hand. The two other Slytherin’s holding his arms still looked at each other in confusion. “Relax and it won’t hurt...”

Sirius opened his eyes, they were dark as he turned his head and looked at Yaxley. “What are you gunna...oh...” the fingers on his erection tightened and he pushed his hips forward with a strangled whimper. It had been too long since he had had sex, he had been resorting to using his hand in the dead of night, restraining himself from seeking sexual release elsewhere. He belonged to James. Even if it meant that James would never touch him again, he had sworn to himself that he was James’ body and soul and he wouldn’t let anyone else touch him again. Yaxley’s hand was compelling, he could no longer fight it and he moaned heavily as his eyes fell part way closed and let the pleasure wash through him.

“Hold him down.” Yaxley ordered as he released Sirius and unzipped his trousers, he looked at Sirius’ cock after yanking them down to his knees. He grinned to himself as his friends forced Sirius onto his hands and knees and held him still. “The only way to destroy something like this is to take away his manhood...” He breathed as he looked around at the others, they were shifting uncomfortably and eyeing the scene warily.

“Yaxley...this is a bad idea...”

“Shut up Rosier, if you don’t want to watch then go back to the common room.”

“But he’s...”

“I know what he is! If we want to get the better of him then we need to control him, show him who’s boss...” He undid his own trousers and knelt behind Sirius who shifted.

“Shit.” Sirius swore. “If we fuck here we’ll be caught you twat!” He snapped. “And I don’t fancy an audience. Do you want everyone to call you gay?!” Someone yanked on his hair and he winced. “Listen to me, if you want to fuck, I’m willing...you don’t have to do it here...I know another place...you’ll be kicked out of school if you do it here. My friends will be looking for me...”

Yaxley paused, a small frown creased his brow before he nodded. “Perhaps you’re right...if we do it here and I’m kicked out before I qualify my parents will be...unhappy.” He stood and fastened his trousers back up. Sirius relaxed as he was released, he sat up and quickly covered himself up. “Take me to this place.”

XXX

James gazed at the Map idly, he searched it for any sign of Sirius. He hadn’t returned after his detention and it was bugging him. He spotted Sirius’ dot and watched it standing on the third floor corridor. He frowned as he saw that he was with several Slytherin’s, they faded right off the map and with a jolt he realised where they were going. James felt uneasy, why would Sirius be going into the magical Room of Requirement with Slytherins?

“What’s wrong James?” Remus asked, lowering the book he had been reading and seeing James sitting up on his bed and frowning at the map.

“It’s Sirius...he’s just gone into the Room of requirement with Yaxley and a few other Slytherin scum...”

Remus frowned. “Don’t jump to conclusions, James. Sirius is probably fine...”

“Probably? He’s with Slytherins!”

Remus shook his head slowly. “Don’t go check on him.” He said and cut James off before he could speak. “He can think for himself...have you considered the possibility that he’s there willingly? That he wants to be with them?”

James paused. “You mean...are you saying that you think he’s getting laid?”

Remus shrugged. “It’s a possibility.”

“Sirius wouldn’t...he’s...”

“Single and available...he’s also sexually active. He’s a boy, James. Surely you didn’t expect him to be celibate?”

James looked down at the map again and frowned. “I...I don’t know...”

Remus shook his head slowly, a little sadly. “You can’t own him, James. He’s not a possession, he’s a human being who has needs...if you can’t satisfy those needs he’s going to go elsewhere.”

XXX

As usual the Room of Requirement provided everything it thought they would need. The bed was large and draped with black satin curtains, Sirius looked around. He had only ever used this room as a way to avoid Filch and the teachers, and then it had turned into a broom cupboard. He walked over to the bed and ran his hand over the satin drapes, he turned to look at Yaxley. “So...how do you want to do this?” He said in a voice with little emotion. He knew that if he fought, if he struggled in any way they would rape him so he decided, as he had with Rudolphus Lestrange that he would be a willing participant. This way he would avoid the humiliation, the pain and he might even get to enjoy it.

Yaxley gazed around the room with fascination, his blue eyes wide as he took in all the toys arranged on a table, the bondage equipment, even a few leather whips were provided. Sirius almost smiled, the room was obviously kinky. “What is this place?”

Sirius shrugged. “No idea...I found it a while back when I was hiding from Filch...er...do those guys have to be here?” He indicated Rosier and the others who were looking around with avid curiosity and disgust.

“I want to be here to witness this, Black.” Rosier said with a sneer. He withdrew a camera and Sirius eyed it. “I want to document your humiliation.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow. “Humiliation? I’m willing...you can’t rape the willing, Rosier.” He smirked and shed his shirt, it fell to the floor in a heap as he opened his belt and trousers. “Is this an orgy then?” He said slowly, sliding his hand into his trousers and smirking. “Never had one before...could be fun to experiment.”

Yaxley eyed Sirius warily as he climbed onto the bed and knelt there, he felt the eyes of his friends and met Sirius’ silver-grey ones. He could see a challenge there, an irresistible challenge that said; can you make me cum? Can you live up to your threats? Sirius’ smile widened as he saw Yaxley fall into his trap. He lifted a hand and beckoned, his bracelets jingling. “I’ll show you...” Yaxley hissed as he climbed onto the bed behind him, he grabbed his hair and pulled his head back roughly. “I want these guys to watch as I make you lose your dignity, your pride...I’ll fuck you into oblivion and leave you begging for more.” He whispered it into Sirius’ throat.

Sirius smiled and hummed as he grabbed Yaxley’s wrist and pushed his hand into his trousers. “Fuck yes...” He whispered as Yaxley clasped his erection. “Mmm...” He almost laughed, it was amusing him to realise that Yaxley assumed he was going to be in control. He obviously had no idea that Sirius could easily turn him into jelly with his body, it was the easiest thing in the world. He had done it multiple times to James, although James was allowed to dominate him. He liked giving in to James, he trusted him enough to give him everything. But not this time, this time Sirius would control everything. He moved Yaxley’s hand on his cock, letting his eyes fall closed as he monitored Yaxley’s breathing. He felt the blonds erection pressing against his arse and smirked as he let himself fall forward onto all fours, he rocked his hips back and got a moan as a reward. He opened his eyes and saw Rosier blushing furiously as he watched, the others were shifting uncomfortably. He grinned and rolled onto his back so he was looking into Yaxley’s eyes. “Come on then, make me cum...fuck me until I’m screaming...” He lay still as Yaxley pulled down his trousers for him, he smiled to himself feeling the rush of power flood his veins. He may prefer being a bottom but he certainly didn’t let his lovers gain too much control, unless it was James. He pressed his foot against Yaxley’s obvious erection, he watched his face as he pressed against it lightly before taking the pressure away. He slipped a hand out, his head hung over the edge of the bed and, making sure each movement was slow and sensual he beckoned over the boy who had his wand. “Give it to me...” He whispered huskily. The boy swallowed and put his wand in his hand. Sirius smiled and reached down between his legs, pushing the wand tip into his body slightly he winced and muttered a few spells. It saved him from having to put up with Yaxley’s fingers inside his body. With a soft moan he removed his wand tip and opened his eyes to see Yaxley looking shocked. “I’ve got to prepare myself, you won’t know how to do it...seeing as you’re not erm...gay.” He giggled and opened his legs. “You ready to show me what a bad boy I’ve been? Come and punish this filthy bloodtraitor.” He watched Yaxley’s eyes darken as he moved forward, Sirius lifted his hips and let his head fall back. Yaxley’s hands were rough as they grabbed his legs and he lifted them, exposing Sirius to him. Sirius waited and then felt the heat as Yaxley pressed himself inside his body. “Ah...” He grabbed a handful of the sheets as the feeling of being full filled him with pleasure. He smiled to himself and tipped his head right back, he opened his eyes and looked directly into Rosier’s eyes. He moved his hips as Yaxley established a rhythm. “Yes...” He breathed and reached behind his head, his hand grabbed the wood of the bed frame and he gasped, his eyes fluttering closed briefly as he arched his back.

Yaxley’s face was intent, he watched Sirius’ body moving with his, the pale skin with all those scars scattering his muscles entranced him. He gazed at it in fascination as Sirius tightened his muscles around him and he gasped, his hips jerked slightly.

“Harder...fuck me harder...” Sirius demanded, his eyes glued to his audience. He realised that he was getting off on getting watched, he actually liked it. He smiled again and let his hands slide down his body. He took hold of his erection and squeezed it as Yaxley’s pace speeded up. Sirius’ eyes met those of one of Rosier’s friends, he was a handsome boy with wavy yellow hair and dark blue eyes. Sirius didn’t know his name and he didn’t care, he beckoned him closer and, while upside down, he opened his trousers and released his cock. He smiled and reached out with his tongue. The boy shuddered and moaned and Sirius took that as acceptance, he took him into his mouth. Pleasure erupted in his gut as he moved, the hands grasping his hips sent thrills down his spine as he used his body to make Yaxley moan desperately. He smiled around his mouthful, as the blond thrust into his throat. He released him momentarily to swear and arch his back as the boy pinched his nipples. “Nng...yes...yes...” He gasped and the boy guided himself back into his mouth. He let him control the pace, the boy fucking his mouth ruthlessly and Sirius closed his eyes feeling an orgasm building like a tight coil in his abdomen. He moved his hips, adjusting himself to ensure that Yaxley was hitting his prostate and felt the coil twist viciously as hot liquid filled his mouth. He swallowed with difficulty as Yaxley shuddered, his hands tightening on Sirius’ hips as he came. Sirius let his own Orgasm roll over him in wave after wave of beautiful release, he gasped and arched his back after releasing the blond. Finally he collapsed back with a satisfied sigh and closed his eyes.

XXX

James woke to the sound of the door opening, he sat up and opened his curtains. Sirius smiled at him as he walked over and sat on his bed. “Where were you?” James asked quietly.

“Busy.” Sirius replied mysteriously. “I need a shower...” He stood but James grabbed his wrist and pulled him back to the bed, he sat behind him and buried his face in his neck. “Jamie...”

“You stink of sex...You’ve been fucking Slytherin’s haven’t you?” James asked, his grip on Sirius’ wrist tightened possessively.

“And if I have?” Sirius replied as James’ breath teased his skin.

“I...”

“You’re in love with Evans, James.” Sirius replied pulling away slowly. “I have...needs. I can’t remain celibate...I tried and I...I’m too weak. I like sex. I enjoy it...”

“Everyone likes sex, Sirius.”

“Then why are you jealous?”

“I’m not.” James released Sirius, missing the contact immediately. Sirius turned to face him, his eyes glittering in his face.

“Really? Is that the truth?” He sighed and closed his eyes. “Do you understand how hard this is for me? I can’t sleep without dreaming of you. I can’t get enough satisfaction from my hand. You haunt my dreams and I wake up sticky. You haven’t noticed...It’s fucking torture! It’s worse when I know that you’re thinking of Evans when you jerk off at night, I have to listen to that! I have to lie there and hear you speak her name and I can’t...I can’t do it...It’s too hard!”

James grabbed him and pulled him close, he could smell semen on him and shuddered as the green eyed monster raged in his chest. He closed his eyes tightly. “I’m sorry.”

Sirius’s hand went to his pyjama bottoms, he bent his head and began kissing James’ treasure trail gently. “I can’t not touch you...just being this close to you I...I want to feel you inside me.” He ran his tongue across the skin just beneath James’ navel and felt him shudder. “Even...even if all you do is use me. Use me and think of her. Think of her when you’re fucking me. I don’t care! I don’t care anymore! I want you! I need you Jamie...”

“Wait!” James grabbed Sirius’ hand before it could touch him, Sirius looked up at him in confusion. “Do you have such little regard for yourself?” He whispered.

Sirius frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Don’t you care that I can’t love you back? Sirius, you deserve more than this.”

Sirius shook his head, he pulled James to him with a firm hand around the back of his neck and brought their lips within touching distance. “I don’t deserve anything. Treat me like shit. Make me do degrading things, fuck me until I’m bleeding and I’ll always, always love you. I’ll never leave your side. My life is meaningless...all I care about, all I need to live for is you...without you I have nothing. Without your light there’s only darkness...don’t...please don’t make me live like that.” His voice took on a note of desperate fear and James frowned.

“That’s...Sirius...”

Sirius kissed him deeply, cutting him off as he pushed him back on the bed. “When you marry Evans...when you have your children and your family, I’ll leave. I’ll watch from a distance, if you’re in danger I’ll come to you but otherwise I’ll be out of your life for good....as long as I can have this, right now. As long as we can be together for now I-I can...” Sirius pushed James’ fingers against his erection. “I can live with myself.”

James was stunned into silence, he didn’t know what to do with that level of devotion. He didn’t know what to say. He gazed up into Sirius’ eyes, they glittered with passion in the darkness and he groaned heavily. “Oh...yes Jamie...” He smiled sweetly as he bent his head and began kissing his way down James’ bare chest.

“Sirius, you need to stop.”

Both boys froze at that voice, Sirius turned his head to the dark figure standing at the bottom of the bed. “Moony?” Sirius muttered as he released James and sat upright.

Remus moved towards them and climbed onto the bed, he ignored Sirius’ prominent erection and pulled him into an embrace. “Please, Sirius, I despise it when you talk like that.”

“Like what, Moonikins?” Sirius asked, he held Remus close, enjoying the brotherly affection and feeling his erection fade. He smiled softly.

“Like you’re worthless.” Remus whispered and pulled away, he pushed hair from Sirius’ eyes. “You’re not worthless...”

“I am.” Sirius sighed, his voice held no hint of emotion. He spoke as if he was merely stating that the sky was blue and birds flapped their wings to fly. “I’m not very good at anything much, I don’t really bring anything to this group...let’s face it, I’m pretty useless at most things.” He smiled softly. “The only thing I have are my looks...If I can use that to stay with you and James I will. I’ll use my body in whatever way I can to try and help...even if it is just a casual fuck occasionally.”

Remus grabbed his hands in his own and gazed intently into his eyes. “You are worth every galleon in Gringotts, every cloud in the sky, every star, every planet every living creature on this entire planet and more! You are brilliant, you’re smart, funny, good and loyal! You’re powerful Sirius, even if you don’t see it in yourself...we love you. We all love you and without you there would be no Marauders! Do you understand?”

The intensity with which Remus spoke was almost scary, Sirius gazed into his determined eyes and felt his heart speed up in his chest. He shook his head. “No...” He muttered and pushed Remus away. “No...I-I’m not...I’m...useless...everyone knows that! You’re blind if you think I’m clever...or strong...or-or anything! I’m pathetic and weak...I fucked a bunch of Slytherin’s tonight...I fucked them just so they wouldn’t rape me! I’ve done it before...so I...I did it again...and I’ll do it if it happens again...it’s not rape if I’m willing...is it? So I...I let them fuck me. I make them cum and I let myself cum...I-I need that. If I can make someone feel something, be it pleasure or pain...it means I’m alive. If I feel pleasure, pain, humiliation, victory...it means I’m alive. I have to keep feeling because the day I stop feeling is the day I die.”

James watched Sirius’ eyes flick between them both, slowly he lifted his hand and grabbed a handful of that silky hair. He dragged Sirius to him and pressed their foreheads together. “I love you Sirius Black.” He breathed with as much feeling as he could muster. He felt Sirius tense. “I love you. I love you.”

“J-Jamie...Jamie stop.” Sirius tried to pull away, his body shakings lightly. “I still smell o-of them...”

“I don’t care.” James, held him in place. “I don’t know what my life would be like without you, Sirius. But...I don’t ever want to find out. If you leave me I’ll hunt you to the ends of this earth, I’ll find you If I have to tear the world apart! I would give my soul to the Dementors kiss if it would save you from harm.”

Sirius trembled, his hands clenched into fists against James’ chest, he had his eyes squeezed tightly shut. “Stop it.”

“I won’t.” James said firmly. “I won’t stop until you realise just what you are, just what you mean to me...to us...”

“You’re our friend, Sirius.” Remus whispered, moving closer and wrapping his arms around both his friends. “You’re my pack.”

“And mine.” James whispered.

“We love you and Dumbledore told me once...when I was in his office terrified that everyone would find out what I am...he told me that love is the most powerful magic in the world, he said that there’s a room in the Department of Mysteries where they’re studying it. He said that love can heal all wounds, all scars...no matter how deep.”

“Love is...love is for people who deserve it. Love is for people like you and James. People who live in the light...” Sirius pulled away and gazed into James’ eyes. “Love is what you should give to Lily Evans, to your children when you have them. Love is something you should give to those who deserve it...those who aren’t tainted and filthy...those who aren’t disgusting and worthless. You should give it all to Evans. She’s like you...she shines when she’s loved...” He smiled and pressed his forehead to James’ chest. “Forget me. Forget my feelings. None of that matters...because...because you’re the only thing that matters. You make it worth being alive...you erase the darkness...”

James lifted Sirius’ head with a hand beneath his chin. “Love is for everyone Siri, even you. Especially you.”

“You’re not with your parents anymore...” Remus said, rubbing Sirius’ back soothingly. “They don’t matter anymore, we’re your family, if you’ll let us.”

Sirius looked at his friends in silence before he leaned up and pressed his lips to James’, he held him in place with a hand at the back of his neck. “I love you James Potter.” He breathed as he pulled away. “I’m sorry...I can’t think of myself the way you do.” He smiled softly before turning to Remus, he captured him in a kiss, he felt him tense and his brown eyes became huge in his face. When Sirius released him he chuckled. “And you Remus...our Moony...without you I’d have fallen to pieces years ago. You don’t understand how happy it makes me that you say these things...but...But I’m not any of them.” He smiled. “I’m a worthless stain on the tapestry of life that needs to be wiped clean, as my mother used to say. I can’t do much but I promise you one thing, I’ll kill and die for all of you.” He stood up and slid off the bed. “Well, if you don’t want to fuck I’m going to take a shower.” He waved over his shoulder and went into the bathroom.

James sighed and looked at Remus, the sadness in those brown eyes made his heart ache. “He’s going to kill himself if we’re not careful...” He said softly.

Remus shook his head. “I don’t think he will...not because he has any regard for his own life, but because of you. I believe he meant it when he said you’re the only thing keeping him breathing...”

“But...but what happens if I do marry Evans?” James breathed, he felt worry bubble in his stomach.

“I...I don’t know, James. I really don’t want to think about it...” Remus muttered, his face showing concern.

“Remus?”

“Yes?”

“I love him...can you believe that?” James gazed at the bathroom door and wrapped his arms around his knees. “If he asked me to I’d rip off my right arm for him.” He smiled softly to himself. “It’s...so hard to keep my hands off of him but...”

“But there’s Lily.” Remus finished for him, he put his hand on James’ shoulder and smiled. “You love her as well...”

“Yeah...” James muttered to his knees. “She’s soft and lovely and so, so gentle...But Sirius is...he’s almost the complete opposite. With him there has to be blood...it’s not right if there isn’t blood. I want to mark him and I know it’s ok if I do. I want to claim him, to own him...to have him know I love him in any physical way I can think of. It’s not right if its gentle...gentleness isn’t him. He’s like...like lightening...Like a heavy storm and he’s in my head...his eyes...his eyes are so raw! So passionate...he’s the embodiment of lust.”

Remus chuckled. “That’s a bit dark but very poetic, I didn’t know you had it in you Prongs.”

James grinned. “I suppose I am a bit eloquent when I want to be.”
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Amore et Amicitia