Where Others Fear to Tread

Chapter 4

“Mr. Potter, please try and concentrate in my class that is the third time you’ve turned Mr. Finnigan unsuccessfully into frog and quite frankly your unappreciative classmate is beginning to look a little green.” Harry put his wand down on the table quietly as McGonagall turned Seamus back into a very normal colored schoolboy. Apologetically Harry smiled at Seamus but the Irish born lad was having none of it and instantly gathered his books and moved seats to the back. It seemed Seamus was taking his chances with Neville Longbottom’s bad luck over Harry’s obvious distraction.

After the meeting last night Harry had spent all day in a daze, carrying out tasks without thinking about them or their consequences. His mind was too lost in the prospect of becoming Snape’s mate to allow focus on his studies. His distance had not gone unmissed both by his professors and his friends.

Having not slept two hours together last night Harry had been the first down to breakfast, the great hall eerily quiet in the early hours of the morning. Harry had sat for two hours at his seat at the Gryfindor table, a blank piece of parchment in front of him and a quill poised to write. In an attempt at stilling his disturbingly overactive imagination about what exactly it would be like to be married to Snape, Harry had decided to get a head start on this ‘contract’ business. Harry had no idea what he was supposed to consider no less what he was supposed to write. In the two hours he’d accomplished three points he thought he wanted to include. One was that he wanted to still play Quidditch. The second point was that he wanted to see his friend’s everyday and the third point was clearly scribbled in large capital letters. NO SEX. The moment he’d written the last point down he knew he was in troubled, as his mind began to reel at the prospect of actually having to sleep with Snape. The thought had made him shudder with abhorrence, just as he did now as he sat in the middle of Transfiguration with his friends.

“Are you alright Harry?” Harry snapped his attention back to the class and glanced across at Ron who was staring at him strangely from the next desk over. Thank-fully Hermione was still in frog form and so Harry was spared the inevitable questions she was bound to ask should she too have witnessed his shudder.

“Yeah, just a bit cold that’s all.” Harry whispered back to his friend who didn’t seem at all convinced by his friends excuse. Thank-fully Harry had been spared an inquest from his friends the night before. Having returned to the tower, Harry had found Hermione and Ron curled up together on the couch having obviously fallen asleep waiting for him. Not that that was surprising it had been rather late when he’d returned to his dorm. If there had been only one decision he’d made during his restless night it had been to keep his situation secret from his friends. There was little point in worrying his friends about something none of them could change, and Harry dreaded trying to explain to them what was happening when he himself was still unsure.

That decision however had proved harder said than done at breakfast. While he’d stashed his pathetic list away before anyone had arrived in the hall, Harry had been bombarded with questions about the meeting before either Ron or Hermione’s bums had hit the benches of the table. Harry had politely answered their questions with vague answers, deliberately avoiding the topic of Snape when Hermione asked after the professor’s health. Eventually they’d given up when it was clear Harry was being obtuse. His unwillingness to discuss the meeting however didn’t stop the concerned glances his friends had been throwing him all day. It didn’t help either that Harry had done abysmally at all his assigned tasks in class, even going so far as to hex Professor Lupin in defense class. Further more with each mistake he made his professors had made very little comment. Thank-fully though this last class of the day was coming to an end.

“Thank-you class that will be all.” Professor McGonagall signaled the end of the class when she was pleased that all students had been returned to their usual selves. The class of Gryfindor’s and Hufflepuffs began packing their things away chatting quietly among themselves about the homework they had been given and their planned evening activities. Harry rose to follow Hermione and Ron from the room but was stopped by a gentle hand that came to rest on his shoulder. “A word if I may Harry.” McGonagall smiled down at Harry warmly from behind her square shaped glasses, waiting patiently until the rest of the class had left before addressing her charge again. “Are you well Harry? Professor Sprout and Professor Lupin reported to me at lunch that you are not yourself today.” Harry sighed and lowered his head to his chest quietly shaking his head.

“I’m fine I just didn’t get a lot of sleep last night and I keep thinking about...” Harry trailed off to watch as his head of house nodded in understanding about the unspoken problem. McGonagall sighed softly and led Harry back to the chairs in the center of the room sitting her charge down in one before sitting down herself opposite him.

“I understand this is difficult Harry. Your life is going to change considerably over the next few months but you must do your best to accept these changes and continue on with your life.” McGonagall could tell her words meant little Harry but she tried to comfort him all the same. “If I may be so bold as to speak my mind, Professor Snape is hardly the worst person you could spend your life with.” Harry was of a different opinion entirely and scowled up at his head of house, who chuckled softly and shook her head in amusement. “I know it may not seem like that now but with time you may come to understand one another a little better. I admit Severus is neither the handsomest man I know nor the most pleasant but he is loyal and defensively protective of those he calls his family. He would not wish you harm and I know he will look after you to the best of his ability.” Harry nodded quietly beginning to see where McGonagall was coming from. Considering some other people he knew of, Snape was hardly the worst man he could be married to. “And this ‘union’ I am sure will bring you closer together, perhaps you may even become friends after some time?” McGonagall looked hopefully at Harry who smiled and nodded warmed by his professor’s attempts at making him feel better about his situation. “Which brings me to the other thing I wish to tell you about. Headmaster Dumbledore has arranged for your contractual negotiation on Friday morning after breakfast in professor Snape’s private rooms. It will take most of the day and I have already informed your professors you will be absence from their classes. Is Friday’s meeting convenient for you?” Harry could hardly believe his professor had just asked him that but smiled and nodded in acceptance.

“Yes. It’s not like I had anything planned accept school.” Harry took out his school diary and with one of his muggle ball point pens noted in the engagement in big bold letters, not that he would need reminding.

“Good, I will tell Dumbledore you will be there.” McGonagall paused as she glanced at Harry’s diary noting the spare bit of parchment sticking out over the edge of the book, with ‘Things I Want’ written across the top in a messy scrawl. “Have you given any thought to your additions to the contact Harry? This is after all your marriage too.” Harry swallowed and nodded nervously pulling out the sheet of paper in question and handing it to the elder witch. Harry watched as McGonagall scanned the brief list, the three points he’d made at breakfast not changing since then. McGonagall smiled at Harry warmly when she came to the end of the list, handing it silently back to the boy who tucked it carefully back into his diary. “That is a good start.” Harry wasn’t sure if McGonagall was just being polite or if his list was actually worth the paper it was written on.

“I didn’t really know what you’re supposed to write down or how. Those three things are just what came to mind first while I was sitting at breakfast this morning.” Harry fiddled nervously with his diary the tattered leather bound book his most precious object that he owned. McGonagall got up from the chair opposite Harry and moved swiftly over to her desk removing a small card from her desk draw and writing down something quickly on the back of the card with her quill.

“As I said Harry it’s a good start. You’re beginning to think about what you want out of your life in union with Professor Snape but perhaps consider some things you may not have ever thought about before.” McGonagall returned from the desk and handed Harry the small card that Harry now saw was a pass for the restricted section in the library. “Think about girlfriends, where you want to live, what you want to do when you leave school, how often you want to see Sirius and your friends, even think about children you might want to have.”

“Children? Girlfriends?” Harry blanched at what McGonagall had just suggested, surely the old woman had gone batty or at the very least, entirely missed the concept of what it meant to be married and further more married to a man! “I’m sorry professors those things can’t happen anymore.” McGonagall sighed at Harry’s surprised reply but she was patient and pointed to the restricted pass she’d given her young charge.

“Harry you are thinking like a muggle again. While Professor Snape has every right to marry you, in wizarding law he cannot prevent you from taking lovers, if you have written it into your marriage contract. While there are naturally restrictions regarding the nature of a ‘consort’ arrangement the fact still remains you may take a lover. As for your comment regarding children? Wizards have been marrying Wizards for millennia and have adapted potions and spells, which allow for a male to carry a child. While it is uncommon it is not unheard of and you should seriously think about this concept before the meeting on Friday.” Harry was stunned mute and stared nearly as horrified as he had been at hearing Snape wanted to marry him in the first place. McGonagall again smiled a little amused at the naivety of her student, as was the case with many of the muggle borns in the school. “Now I understand you do not know of many of these things, that is why I have given you that pass. On the back are two books I highly recommend you reading before Friday, they will help you in making some of these decisions and will aid you in further understanding the situation you are in and what a ‘wizarding marriage’ involves.”

“Thank-you” Harry whispered having just gotten over his shock of knowing male wizards could have children.

“You’re welcome Harry and remember you’re not alone and if you need any advice or help at all my door is always open to you.” Harry knew the conversation had come to an end and rose slowly from his chair surprising his professor by leaning down and pressing a chaste kiss to the side of the woman’s cheek.

“Thank-you.” Harry whispered again with sincerity before he tucked the restricted pass into his diary and headed from the room, feeling somewhat better from the talk and far more determined to understand what was happening to him now he knew how much this ‘contract’ was going to affect his life.

Harry ran up the grand staircase to the Gryfindor tower and practically jumped through the portrait hole and in to the common room. There were a few lingering students but most had already gone down the great hall to wait for dinner. There was fifteen minutes till dinner and Harry was going to have a quick shower before going to his meal. With luck he’d have all evening to himself to search and begin reading the books McGonagall had suggested. If the meeting was on Friday Harry didn’t have long to research. Harry’s plans however came to an abrupt halt when Harry sprang through the door of his dorm to find Ron and Hermione pashing one another over on Ron’s bed. Startled by the door slamming open Ron and Hermione jumped apart in shock, Ron’s hand still buried up the front of Hermione’s tunic as both of them stared at Harry.

“Bloody hell Harry, you could have knocked.” Ron admonished flushing a little as Hermione pulled his hand free of her tunic and began buttoned her shirt back up quickly.

“Sorry wasn’t expecting you to be doing that.” Harry whispered blushing a little himself as he caught sight of Hermione’s plump breasts when he’d come in.

“So, what did McGonagall want Harry?” Hermione changed the topic quickly sweeping away the awkwardness between them as she sat up from Ron’s bed and moved over to sit on Harry’s as the brown haired boy began rooting through his closet for some clean clothes.

“Just wanted to talk about my homework and stuff.” Harry hated lying to his friends but the truth just wasn’t acceptable at present, even to himself. Hermione folded her arms across her chest, having snatched the pair of jeans from Harry’s grasp so that the boy would look at her.

“You’re not telling us something Harry, what happened at that meeting last night?” Hermione was determined and Harry sighed at the red haired girl feeling extremely guilty under her accusing glare. Sitting down next to Hermione on the bed Harry reached out and took her hand in his laying her palm flat upon his own, as he often did when they talked about personal things.

“Look. It’s really complicated and I don’t quite know what’s happening myself yet. I can’t tell you because I don’t feel confident enough about it to say stuff that’s not going to make you worry about me.” Hermione’s accusing gaze softened as she twined her hand with Harry’s in comfort. “All you need to know is that I’m fine and if I need your help I’ll come to you.” Hermione nodded quickly elbowing Ron in the side to ensure he nodded in compassionate understanding as well.

“Will you tell us eventually?” Ron inquired as he watched his best friend pull his hand away from his girlfriends, obviously having seen a little of Ron’s jealousy surge to the surface at the intimate touch.

“Yes, soon when I’m feeling better equipped to explain it. I just need you to give me some space for a while and not keep asking me questions.” It hurt Harry to ask this of his friends but he knew they’d understand. Hermione leaned forward and hugged Harry softly around the neck making the boy blush a little. Ron looked no to pleased and muttered to himself that he would be getting the same treatment if Harry hadn’t barged into the dorm. Harry ignored Ron’s muttering and got up from the bed gathering his things for the shower. “Thanks guys you know I love you right.” Harry laughed cheekily as he made his way to the door to the dorm.

“Bugger off Harry.” Ron threw a pillow in Harry’s direction as he went back to mauling his girlfriend; Harry went to shut the door laughing to himself but then paused and stuck his head back into the room to where his best friends were kissing on his bed still.

“Hey and get on your own bed, the idea of you two fucking on my things is just disgusting.” Harry glared at Hermione and Ron who both blushed a bright crimson red at Harry’s comment. With that in mind Harry left his friends to their own devises, having plans of his own for the evening….

TBC>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>