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It's just a book	By : QueenRuby Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 13757 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Disclaimer: Let's see I live in America I have to work in a crummy job and I pay rent for that house I live in. No, I so am not JKR. Too bad, I could use the money.

A/N: Ok the look into what is happening in the �real world� wont happen until chapter six. Because I already had chapters for and five written. I thank you all for your lovely reviews. For those of you who are interested, I got the idea for her constantly teasing him about his age from my own experience dating an older man. Yes, they then do feel like they have to prove they are not that old to their younger partner. Thanks goes to my two Betas Akathryna and Alianne. Hee hee both A names.

Chapter 4: Discussions

Snape was definitely going to let Miss Granger know what he thought about her leaving him in town yesterday. He stood in front of the door of her room, ready to hit it as hard as he could, when the door opened. Hermione stood in the door with her dress partly on.

�Well are you going to come in or stand there scowling at me like some spoiled pure-blood?� She turned back into her room and he saw the buttons on the back of her dress were not all the way done up, exposing the creamy flesh of her back to him. �Melody, would you please leave us?� she asked.

�But your dress my lady.� Melody stated, almost looking scandalized at the thought.

�I am sure Lord Snape would not object to doing up the last buttons for me. I really need to talk to him privately. You need not worry about my honor; Lord Snape is too old to do more then think about doing anything,� she reassured the maid.

�I wouldn�t say that my lady.� Melody said with a giggle before leaving.

�How��

�Did I know you were at the door?� Hermione explained, ignoring Snape�s scowl. �The same way you knew what I was thinking yesterday. It seams the spell that brought us here has connected us for some reason.�

�You're saying you can read my thoughts.� He motioned to her to turn around so he could start on her buttons.

�Only the most obvious ones. Your walls are too well placed for me to delve any deeper,� she said, focusing on what she had to say instead of his hands on her naked back. �I can feel your presence though. I felt you pace up and down the hall five times last night.�

�Yes, I was debating coming in here and giving you a lesson about leaving me in town with no way back.� He lowered his voice an octave as he let his hands slowly do up her buttons rubbing small circles on her back as her went.

�Dumbledore is not dead!� she spat out, trying to keep her mind from going where it was heading with him touching her like that. His hands quickly finished doing up the buttons stiffly and he moved away from her.

�What makes you say that?� Snape sneered, trying his best to intimidate her.

�Well every time I mention you killing him, you say I am jumping to conclusions without having all the facts.� Hermione started pacing as she thought aloud. �Besides if you had killed Dumbledore then you would have killed me already.�

�What if I am just using this as a wonderful opportunity for my own perverse pleasure?� He raised an eyebrow and took a step toward her to try to distract her.

�You wouldn�t have asked that. You would have let me believe you were too good to see the hurt even more when you betrayed me.� She looked at him, daring him to argue with her even more.

�You got Potter past my logic test your first year, didn�t you?� He narrowed his eyes at her.

Hermione blushed and put some distance between them. �I was just trying to help stop Voldemort.� She backed up another step when he flinched at the name.

�Don�t say that name. Just because wonder boy does, doesn�t mean you should pick up his bad habits.� He took a step toward her. �How long did it take you to figure the logic problem?�

�You know this is completely off topic. We were discussing our situation at the present moment,� she said, eyeing the door.

�We will get back to it in a moment.� He moved between her and the door. He was really enjoying her nervousness. �How long did it take you?�

�Approximately five minutes. Though it was a long time ago, I might be mistaken.� She cringed, waiting for the outburst that never came.

�I was bested by an eleven year-old with hair Buckbeak could have nested in.� Snape sat down in the only chair in the room. He laughed softly and Hermione found it was rich and almost soothing. She would have really enjoyed hearing him laugh if it had not been aimed at her.

�My hair is not that bad!� She scowled at him. �Like you could talk. I thought with you being a Potions Master you would at least know what shampoo is.�

�I happen to have very oily scalp. In order for me to have what everyone else considers clean hair, I would have to wash it several times a day. Something that just wasn�t on the top of my to-do list with having to teach idiots and be a spy.� Snape's face had quickly gone back to its mask of indifference.

�I have never heard you laugh before,� she stated.

�As I have just said, what would I have to laugh about?� He looked annoyed by this statement. Maybe Longbottom trying to kill everyone in my class was supposed to be funny? Perhaps the Golden Trio trying to kill themselves every year by foolishly running to save the day instead of leaving it to those who could handle it properly. Maybe that was supposed to make me laugh? I know...Dumbledore hiring a more unsuitable candidate for DADA each year.� He looked pointedly at her. �Or perhaps being a spy and having to face the Dark Lord and what he considers fun should make me laugh?�

�Lupin wasn�t that bad.� Hermione said to herself but Snape heard her.

�And that's in reference to one I had to place myself in front of because he had transformed and was trying to kill you,� he sneered.

Hermione decided to move this conversation elsewhere. �Back on topic. We were discussing how to get out of this book.�

Snape was silent of several moments thinking on what he was going to say. �I�m in no hurry to leave. I find I�m enjoying myself.� He watched the range of emotions that crossed her face, very much enjoying her discomfort. �Maybe if you relaxed a little, you wouldn�t be in such a hurry either.�

�You�re telling me to relax?� Hermione could not believe her ears. �Unlike some people I have things I have to do in the real world. Because if you believe Harry and Ron do what they need to do without my help you really haven�t been paying attention the last six years.�

�Fine, do you have any idea who the author of this book is?� Snape asked dryly.
�The book just had the initials Q.R. on the cover,� she told him, not liking the groan that came from his lips.

�Great, the annoying Matchmaker strikes again.� Snape was trying to remember when she had not been right and Hermione had to clear her throat to get him to continue. �She was in Slytherin. I believe my last year there was her first. I know her entire family is known for their �gifts�. She told me, shortly before my graduation, that my soulmate was yet to be born.� He sighed, �She is responsible for Lucius and Narcissa�s marriage. Her family is never wrong when they make a match.�

�That�s enough to make me worried,� she said, sinking to the floor several feet in front of him.

�You should be, as the heroine of this book. She won't release us till you�ve been thoroughly shagged and married.� He watched her turn white again and wondered if she was still a virgin.

�But that means you have to marry too.� Hermione said after regaining her composure. �After all, you were also pulled into this.�

Snape smiled evilly, �And what do you think that means?�

�That you�re supposed to marry one of these fine little court ladies.� Hermione batted her eyelashes and pretended to swoon. Snape decided to let her have her delusions and play along.

�Might as well get comfortable then. I will never go for that type of woman.� He really did love toying with her. Even more so since he knew something she did not.

�Ah, but Sevy-poo, don�t you want one of those precious court flowers on your arm?� Hermione laughed at the face he made.

�I�d rather shag Trelawney.� Snape informed her. He would get her back for that Sevy-poo comment too. Slytherins had been known to wait years for revenge.

�Bad image. Bad Image! Must get out of head!� Hermione had her hands on her eyes and was shaking her head. Snape decided to really give her a bad image.

�Actually imagine walking into the headmaster's office and seeing Albus and Minerva on his desk.� He forced the image back down so her would not have to see it again and watched Hermione's reaction.

�I�m scared! My sex life is ruined. I�ll never get turned on again.� Hermione blushed when she realized it was Snape she was talking to.

�Now that is being melodramatic.� He sat down on the floor next to her, seeing an opportunity to put his plan into action.

�Are you sure you should be sitting on the floor? I mean at your age it must be getting difficult to get up and down.� Hermione teased him.

�I�ll show you getting up and down.� Severus growled as he pulled her into his arms and conquered her mouth. He deepened the kiss just long enough that she started to respond before he dumped her back down on the floor and stood up. �Come on, Princess, you have a sister to meet.� He left before she could say anything.

�He is right. No one in their right mind would ever marry him. We'll be here forever,� she said to herself, trying to deny what that kiss had done to her.

*****

Hermione watched her new sister get out of the carriage. The woman�s long blond hair was blowing in the wind and she could see her sparkling blue eyes from where she stood by the steps. There was a sinking feeling in her stomach as the 5�8� Princess turned toward them.

�Oh dear god, it is a Mary Sue!� Hermione groaned.

�A what?� Snape asked with a puzzled look on his face.

�A Mary Sue,� she hissed in response. �A super character invented by hack writers to create a too powerful, too perfect fictional character.� She continued to explain. �It�s the sort of person the writer secretly wants to be, and yet no one else wants to read about. At least, not without feeling the urge to mangle the book!�

�Well she is heading this way.� Snape informed her. �Try to be civil.�

�Hello, Pot, this is Kettle calling,� she said for his ears only. She had to stifle a laugh at his look of confusion.

�Hermione!� The young woman squealed as she clung to Hermione as if her life depended on it.

�Um, hi Megan.� Hermione said patting the woman�s back awkwardly. She shot a glare at Snape over Megan�s shoulder as he laughed at her discomfort.

�I always wanted a sister! Now all we have to do is find you a husband so we can all have dinner parities and social events. Speaking of which, my husband was delayed; he had manly stuff to do. You know how men are.� She finally released Hermione. Megan turned at that time to see Severus. �Sev! I haven�t seen you since the wedding!�

It was Hermione's turn to get amusement out of his discomfort as he was given the embrace of death. �I would so love to stay and chat but I have to talk to my father about something,� she said, letting go of him and bouncing away.

Snape watched the young woman as she left to find her father. �I would prefer to avoid her as much as possible.� He curled his lip as if smelling something putrid.

Hermione laughed at his obvious disdain over the excessively happy woman. �Be thankful there are no cheerleaders at Hogwarts.�

�Do I even want to know?� Snape asked.

�Imagine a lot more girls like Megan wearing skimpy outfits, talking about beauty tips and boys, plus doing stupid dances at every Quidditch game to cheer on their team,� she informed him with a shudder.

�Well the skimpy outfits wouldn�t be so bad.� That statement got the response he was looking for. He liked her riled up and fighting with him.

�You sound just like Ron. To think I had placed you at a higher intelligence then that. My mistake.� Hermione turned to storm into the castle but Snape grabbed her arm to prevent her.

�Contrary to popular belief, I am a human and a man. Therefore, I appreciate a woman�s body.� His gaze raked over her but Hermione was still too ticked to notice. �Unlike the drooling idiot you just compared me to, I enjoy a intelligent, spirited woman. If she happens to be easy on the eyes, then that�s just an added bonus.�

The heat of his hand through her dress was starting to calm her down. She remembered the kiss they had shared and actually started to think that it had not been about revenge on her for old comments. Remembering �I see no difference� was like being hit with a bucket of ice water. �Well if I ever see anyone like that I�ll be sure to send her your way.�

She pulled out of his hold and stormed into the castle in classic Snape fashion. A vary bewildered Severus watched her go, wondering where he had lost control over the encounter.

*****

�Are you sure about this?� The King asked his now youngest daughter.

�We both know I was never meant to be queen. I�m perfectly happy being a Lady to my Lord and raising a family,� Megan stated.

�Right. As soon as Hermione chooses a husband, I will make the announcement.� He smiled at his daughter. �We don�t her to be plagued with suitors that only want her for her crown.�

�Thank you father!� She threw her arms around him giving her father a death-grip hug. Neither of them saw the scowling servant that walked past the door.

*****

�Damn her! Why the hell dose she think I married her!� David said, ignoring the hushing motions his servant was making at his tone. �I did not put up with the months of courting and her over-exuberance just to stay a Lord.�

�Of course not my Lord. You deserve to be King.� He watched his master pace back and forth. �I know someone who, for the right price, could make it all go away.�

�Money is of course no object as long as I become King.� David smiled wickedly. �Have it done as soon as possible and with the utmost discretion. It wouldn�t do to have my lovely wife think I was behind the death of her new sister.�

�Trust me. No one will ever know you were behind it, my lord.� The servant bowed low.
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It's just a book