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Shadows and Light	By : Cardinal Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Snape Views: 5126 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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I don’t want to share. Snape thought acidly to himself as he sat, reclined in a wingback chair in front of his common room fire. He didn’t care that Harry was marrying Ginny for some bloody, Gryffindor reason, he wanted Potter all to himself in word and in deed. The trouble was that if Snape insisted on having Harry to himself, the boy would almost certainly choose the Weasley girl. Potter would do anything to look out for his friends, especially the werewolf.

What if he pressed Potter to make a decision? Did Potter care enough about him to actually choose him over Lupin? Snape didn’t dare to hope that he meant that much to Potter. Could he just sit around and watch while Potter created a life without him? As much as Snape enjoyed the boy he didn’t want to be the person Harry had an affair with; he wanted to be the most important part of Harry’s life, as selfish as that sounded.

Leaving his chair, Snape poured himself a small glass of scotch, not even wincing as the liquid burned down his throat and heated his belly. He had come to his decision, and he knew that no matter what happened, he was going to have to live with it.

-=-

Harry wasn’t sure what had gotten in to Snape lately. When they’d first started their rendezvous the man had been more than okay with letting things remain casual. They met together, had sex, and enjoyed each other, Harry hadn’texpected anything else going in to the relationship. He could still remember how wary and repulsed by the idea he’d been at first, but Snape had surely shown him that the Slytherin was an experienced lover. Now, Harry had to grudgingly admit that, Snape had become something of a regular figure in his life that he looked forward to seeing every evening. They hardly ever talked, or had meaningful conversations, but they didn’t’ have to, they communicated with their bodies, and that was all Harry really needed from Snape.

Harry had never expected to see Snape so jealous. He could still remember the look on the Slytherin’s face in the Shrieking Shack when he’d been coercing Remus to tell him about Harry’s plans. It must really be bothering Snape that I’m marrying Ginny. Harry wasn’t sure why it bothered Snape so much, it wasn’t as if Snape were the committed relationship-type. He was probably just being possessive, that was a trait that Harry could picture going hand-in-hand with Snape.

Sighing, Harry rubbed nervously sweaty palms on his jeans as he slipped down to the dungeons under the safety of his invisibility cloak. He had become a pro at sneaking down the stone staircases into the dungeons without being heard. After seven years of sneaking around Hogwarts Harry figured that he could do it in his sleep.

Speaking parseltongue to the Slytherin portrait that hung in front of the portal to Snape’s quarters, the painting happily swung out of the way to allow Harry entrance. Stepping in to the professor’s common room, Harry found Snape standing by the hearth, his tall, lean form silhouetted by the fire. For once, Snape was not in his black robes, but in a pair of black slacks, with a black button up shirt that was unbuttoned at the top. The sleeves of his shirt were rolled back to reveal his forearms, the left covered with the faint dark mark that marked him as a Death Eater.

Silence hung between the two men, both remembering their words from earlier. Snape pushed away from the fireplace, he’d decided that if he was going to talk to Potter about their situation that he was going to do so treating Potter like an adult, after all, he’d been having sex with him like one.

“Have a seat Potter.” Snape said, pointing to the chair that was adjacent to his. The Potions Master seated himself as well, resting his right ankle on his left knee, as he masked his nerves.

Harry knew that something was amiss; he’d never been invited to sit with Snape before. Usually they stripped each other’s clothes off and headed straight for the bedroom, or whatever surface seemed suitable. Taking the seat that Snape suggested, Harry gripped the arm rests lightly.

“What’s up? You’ve never invited me to sit down before. Are we actually going to have a conversation?” Harry asked with his usual Gryffindor determination and curiosity.

Snape’s look could have killed a full grown troll, “There’s a reason why we don’t talk Potter. It’s usually because we end up in a fight before the conversation is over.” He pointed out, already feeling his ire rise at the small bit of conversation that they’d had.

When Harry raised his chin defiantly, Snape continued, “Look, I know you’re protecting Lupin and the Weasley girl, but I don’t share Potter, I don’t think that should surprise you. What I’m saying is, you need to pick; it’s either me or them.”

Harry couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He’d figured Snape as the possessive type, but what he hadn’t figured was the ultimatum. And another thing Harry hadn’t expected was the moment of indecision that wrestled within his chest. He’d thought the decision would be easy, and yet there he was, contemplating walking out on Ginny and Remus.

“You know I can’t do that, Snape.” Harry’s heart felt heavy even as he spoke, “They need my help. They were both there for me when I needed them most in the final battle, I can’t turn away from them now.”

Snape felt his stomach plummet, even though he’d been bracing himself for this moment, “Then get out, Potter. We’ve got no further business together.”

Harry’s jaw dropped, leaving his mouth hanging open as he stared at Snape, “You’re serious about this? You’re making me choose?”

“That’s right.”

Harry stood, his fists clenched by his sides, “You really are a bastard, incapable of thinking about anyone besides yourself.” The Boy Who Lived spun on his heel and stormed out of the dungeons, leaving Snape alone in his common room.

Snape stared into the fireplace in the Gryffindor’s absence, his heart still pounding in his ears. He’d expected nothing less, yet it still inevitably hurt.

-=-

“Are you sure about this Severus?” Dumbledore’s worried blue eyes peered at him over the half-moon spectacles that he was famous for.

“I am positive, Albus. I’ve fulfilled the promise that I made Lilly, and you. The boy defeated Voldemort and he’ll be graduating Hogwarts soon. These past seven years have nearly been the death of me, I think I deserve a nice, quiet retirement.” Severus told the Headmaster.

“Is there some reason you can’t wait until the end of the year to retire Severus?” Albus questioned, and there was that look in his eyes that said that he knew more than he let on. That was always the way with Albus Dumbledore, however, he never let on that he knew your deepest secrets.

Snape wrestled with the information about his and Harry’s relationship. In the end he gave in because he knew that there was no one he could trust more than Albus Dumbledore, “Let’s just say that Potter and I have become closer than others would imagine. I do not want to be here for his precious ceremony to the Weasley girl. You cannot deny me this request, Albus. I’ve done too much to earn this retirement.”

Dumbledore steepled his long, bony fingers together as he regarded the man sitting across from him, “You’re right, Severus, I cannot deny that you have earned the right to rest. I’ll find someone to fill in for you. When will you officially be gone from the castle?”

“Tonight, Albus. This castle doesn’t hold anything for me anymore. I’m ready to go.” Severus answered truthfully.

“I understand. Thank you for service Severus, I’ll miss your presence in the castle, you know.” Albus told him in that grandfatherly way that made Severus feel as if someone actually cared about his well-being.

“Yeah.”

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