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Perchance to Dream	By : Ataraxia Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Snape Views: 6300 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own any part of the Harry Potter franchise and do not profit from this story.

Chapter List
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A/N: Hello, everyone! I was re-reading my story and realized there were some formatting and punctuation errors in the previous chapters. If you read them a while ago, I apologize, but they should be fixed now.

This chapter will be fairly heavy on heterosexual smut, so please note that it is NOT appropriate for young readers. This IS a slash story, but the het needs to be here to set a baseline and lay some back story. I hope you enjoy, and don’t worry, the good stuff is coming soon.

Twinkle: Thank you so much for your kind review, I can't tell you how much it meant to me.

~SA

~*~*~

The water was cold. It usually was, but cold showers were something the wretchedly poor were used to, and the Snape family was utterly impoverished. Severus dragged what was left of the bar of soap –a sliver, really – over his pale white form, taking extra care with his underarms and groin.   He used the last remnants of the bar to wash his hair, something he normally avoided, as bar soap dried his scalp and his family rarely spent their hard-earned galleons on proper shampoo.

Today would be a special day.

Well, he thought it would be a special day, anyway. Lily certainly seemed to be hinting at it, and Severus was usually quick to pick up subtle nuances in his friend’s actions.   For days, weeks even, Lily had been getting closer to him. Severus often found her small, delicate fingers running through his hair as they lay in the grass, or her soft thigh pressed against his as they sat under aged oaks.   He felt her heart beat rapidly when she pulled him into a hug, and he couldn’t but notice how tightly she held him, and how firmly her small breasts pressed up against his ribs.

Lily wanted him.

Severus allowed himself a small smile as his wet hair hung in his face like silky curtains.   He never thought that anyone could ever want him, especially not someone as beautiful as Lily. What could she possibly see in him? He was tall, but lanky, and what lean musculature he seemed paltry compared to those of some of the other boys in 6^th year.   His skin was ghastly pale, making his dark eyes stand out like black marbles in his skull. His nose, which took up much of his face, was crooked and slightly hooked.

Yet somehow, despite all his defects, Lily Evans wanted him.

His hesitant smile broadened as he turned the creaking faucet to staunch the flow of frigid water and step out of the cramped shower. Towelling off quickly, he hastily brushed his jet hair and tied it back into a low ponytail. He scrambled for his toothbrush, scrubbing aggressively at the slightly yellowed teeth that hid behind thin lips. All in all, he didn’t look too bad – for Severus Snape, anyway.

He didn’t even remember dressing or how he got to their fort, but soon enough, he stood in his best denims and least-worn jumper before their dilapidated tree house. Lily was already there.

She stood before him, a radiant beauty as per usual with her soft auburn hair draping over her shoulders. Her simple dress was yellow – her favourite colour – and her green eyes sparkled when she saw him approaching. She looked delicious, like some kind of citrus sorbet, all orange and yellow and green.   It warmed his heart.

He helped her into the tree house where they sat for a while, legs pressed together as they watched the sun’s slow descent to the horizon. Severus froze momentarily as he felt slender fingers trace up his thigh, resting inches below his most sensitive flesh. Tentatively, her wrapped a long arm around Lily’s slender shoulders and pulled her towards him.

They kissed.

It wasn’t as if they hadn’t kissed before, but all their previous embraces had been fleeting; the soft, quick kiss that friends shared when they said goodbye. This was different. This was... strange.

Severus breathed in sharply when her delicate tongue probed at his tight lips, seeking entrance into his mouth. He obliged, cautiously, returning her ministrations with inexpert strokes of his own tongue.

It all felt very odd.

He supposed it should. After all, they were both virgins, and what would virgins know about how this was meant to feel?

Returning her kiss, Severus reached a slender hand up to his friend’s chest and gently squeezed her breast, as he’d seen so many couples do in the dark corners of Hogwarts. Through the thin fabric of her dress, he felt her nipple become stiff under his touch and she groaned appreciatively, arching her back.

Lily’s breath came quickly, her moans soft but insistent. She pulled him down onto the rough hewn planks of the tree house floor so that his body covered hers. “Severus,” she moaned between inexpert kisses.   Her hand clasped his fingers and guided them to the hem of her skirt, placing them on her upper thigh.

Severus was at a loss. Well, not entirely; he knew what she wanted, but he suddenly realized that he hadn’t the foggiest idea what to do. He kissed her firmly, hoping his lips would distract from the fumbling fingers that tugged uncertainly at the edge of her knickers.   She was warm, very warm, and wet, too. Sliding a long finger under the elastic legband, he gently probed into her tight wetness.

She cried out s eagerly into his mouth, pressing her hips up against him.

Taking her reaction as an indication that he was somehow succeeding in giving her pleasure, he continued to stroke her cleft, running silky fingers through her hot folds. His fingers found a firm bud nestled in her skin, and he rubbed it tenderly, revelling in the reaction of the woman he loved. “Is this okay?” he asked, unsure of himself.

“Oh gods, Severus, please-“ Lily bucked her hips urgently, impaling herself on his smooth digits. Severus could hear her breath become ragged, and her moans nearly frantic as her muscles pulsed and contracted around his fingers. She reached down with both hands to rid herself of the damp knickers, allowing herself more room to move. Groaning, she spread her legs, her green eyes begging him for some kind of release.

Lily came violently, a scream tearing itself from her delicate throat and her body pulsed under him.

Severus smiled at the flushed face beneath him, feeling a mixture of pride at his accomplishment and happiness that he had given his friend pleasure. He peered down into her green eyes which were glazed with bliss.

“Thank you,” she murmured, smiling up at him languidly.

“Don’t ask for a repeat performance, I’m honestly not sure what I did,” he admitted with a nervous chuckle. His laugh was cut short as her soft lips sought his again, and she gently rolled him onto his back. Breath hitched in his throat as her hands reached for the zip on the front of his denims and gently pulled it down...

Revealing his soft prick.

He hadn’t even noticed that his body wasn’t responding the way it was supposed to. He was with the woman he loved more than anything, shouldn’t he be hard? Shouldn’t he be ready to burst? He stared at his traitorous cock, horrified.

Lily knew better than to try and soothe him - that whatever she said to him in this very moment would merely come across as patronizing. Instead, she covered his mouth (which was still agape) with her own, and kissed him mercilessly. Her lips and tongue begged him to forget his embarrassment; her soft hand gripped him firmly and tried to coax him into arousal.

Severus shuddered. It was the first time the hand that held him, that stroked him, was not his own. He felt himself thicken and grow hard in her palm.

Her lips pressed against his slender neck, kissing her feverishly.   She peeled off his worn jumper and cast it aside as he worked on freeing her from her own clothing.

The dark haired teenager groaned as his fiery counterpart slowly traced her tongue down his thin, hairless chest and down his quivering belly until it came to rest on his (finally) co-operative erection. Her mouth was hot, wet and delicious; any clumsiness of her tongue and lips could be forgiven as she tried to please him.

He moaned in longing as the warm mouth left him, and Lily slid a leg across him and positioned herself so she was hovering over his thighs. Her green eyes searched his face as the question left her swollen lips, “Do you want me?”

“I love you, Lily,” was his only reply.

She hesitated, as if that was not the answer she had sought, before slowly lowering herself onto him.   Crying out as her broke through her barrier, she clenched her thighs around his slender hips and trembled slightly.

He groaned, not entirely sure if it was from the pleasure of her tight body or from concern for her pain. The question escaped him as she began to rock on top of him, wiping his mind clean of any thoughts or confusion.   Slowly, her movements became more confident, more frenzied. He grasped her hips tightly so he could push into her warmth and give her the friction she seemed to crave.   A tortured cry escaped her lips as she climaxed for the second time, her muscles clenching him tightly and coaxing him into his own release.

They lay there together, sated and exhausted on the floor of the old tree house, best friends in a lover’s embrace.   From where he lay spooned around here, Severus could bury his face in her lavender scented hair.

She sighed, softly, and nestled back into his lean body, “I’m glad it was you,” she whispered.

“Mutual,” he agreed, solemnly.

Somewhere in the back of their minds, they both knew he was lying.

~*~*~

“You can’t expect me to believe that the memory of our...tryst... is somehow going to help me find your son,” he spat, angrily. Severus was shaken at the vision he had just seen and, as he was prone to do when cornered or hurt, he lashed out.

Lily regarded him calmly, “I can’t control what you see, Sev. Our lives are irrevocably entwined, yours and mine. You and I and Harry, we’re all woven together. I can’t separate the bad memories from the good.” A small bead of moisture gathered at the corner of her eye and she looked away hastily.

Fuck. Severus deflated, “It isn’t a bad memory, Lily.” He tried to make keep his voice soft and reassuring.

Her smile took on a bitter edge as she stared into his black eyes with subdued ferocity, “No, Sev, it isn’t. We loved each other, and that’s what people who love each other do, right? They make love, they have sex. They give each other pleasure.” She took a step towards him slowly, menacingly almost.

Severus resisted the urge to step back, “If you ever doubted my feelings for you-“ he began.

Lily shook her head, “I know you loved me; as best as you could, anyway. You were confused, Sev.” Her voice cracked.

The whiteness of between seemed to spin around him as his stomach dropped and his heart beat a frantic staccato. She knew. He licked his lips nervously, “You are mistaken.”

Auburn hair flew as her head whipped up, “Don’t you dare lie to me, Severus Snape. You know exactly what I mean!” Green eyes pierced his soul, as if willing the truth from him.

“No.” His voice was firm, only the balled fists at his sides betraying him.

Behind him, the blue flames shot up out of the white floor as if prompted by her fury. She flicked a hand towards it before turning on her heel and walking into the whiteness. “Suit yourself, Sev,” she called over her shoulder, angrily, “But these memories aren’t going to lie for you.”

~*~*~

A blue and grey scarf tickled his nose. It was cold, but the body pressed against him was warm. Opening his eyes, Severus peered over the shoulder of the person hugging him and tried to get his bearings.

Derelict wooden arches indicated that he was on the covered bridge between the clock tower and the stone circle at Hogwarts. Peering out of the corner of his eye, he tried to identify the person – the woman – who was currently in his hesitant embrace.

Cho Chang?

Momentarily startled, Severus realized he must be in someone else’s memory. A quick look down at his strong, tanned hands indicated that he must be reliving a moment of Harry’s life, again.

How did he recognize Harry’s hands so quickly? Dismissing the thought, Severus waited for the scene to play out.

Being inside Harry’s mind was a truly disturbing experience. Once, Snape would have assumed it held little more than cobwebs and random quidditch statistics, but now he knew that to be untrue. The mind of Harry Potter was a truly befuddling place.

Right now, Severus could feel the young man’s confusion as his arms wrapped around the beautiful girl in front of him. He recognized her smooth skin, shiny hair and delicate features as beautiful, but beyond that he didn’t feel an attraction. The hug was nice; a comforting warmth on the frigid winter day, but the body was too soft – too curvy. Harry craved something else, something firmer and less yielding.

“This is nice.” Ms. Chang’s muffled words were nearly lost in the folds of Harry’s robes. Severus felt Harry’s head nod up and down as he made a noise of assent. The girl pulled away from him slightly, lifting her wind-reddened face to peer up at Harry’s. Severus felt Harry panic as the girl’s tongue quickly swiped across her lips and her eyes took on a dreamy stare.

“Harry –“ she whispered, lifting her chin.

Severus felt Harry’s lips meet Cho’s awkwardly. He could feel the girl’s need in her frantic kiss, her hands rubbing his chest firmly, trying desperately to evict a reaction from the Potter. She pressed needily against his closed mouth where his lips remained closed against her prying tongue.

A feeling of unease washed through Harry, but Severus couldn’t quite describe the exact emotion. It was hardly revulsion, but more like distaste coupled with confusion and something else – fear, perhaps. It was a similar feeling to that which Severus had experienced when he had made love to Lily. The wrongness of it was overwhelming.

“We should get back.” Severus heard Harry say, quietly.

Chang looked confused, then slightly hurt. “Don’t you like me?” she asked, plaintively, “Is there someone else?”

An image ripped through Harry’s mind, so brief, Severus barely caught it. He saw a glimpse of a jawline flecked with dark stubble, followed by a vision of hands. Men’s hands with long fingers and large knuckles, rubbing the masculine jaw, as if the man in question were concentrating.

Severus felt Harry’s lips curve into an apologetic smile as he told the girl, “Yes.”

A rush of electricity shot through his body before the world around him melted.

~*~*~

He was back in his chair in the hospital room, disoriented and strangely tingly. Dumbledore was there, observing him with a look of apprehension tinged with the slightest bit of amusement.

“Severus, my boy, you appear to be glowing.”

Snape cast a glance at Harry’s window, and started with shock. He was glowing. Snape`s reflection stared back at him, looking almost normal except for a bizarre blue aura that hung off him, twinkling subtly.

“That dream ended – strangely.” Severus murmured, still staring at the reflected image. “I felt a strange shock and was jerked out of it. It normally doesn’t happen that way.” He cast a glance down at his hands, turning them over to observe the unearthly blue glow that radiated from his finger tips.   Looking up at Dumbledore quizzically, he asked “Is this a piece of the soul?”

The old wizard shook his head, slightly, “I have no idea, dear Severus, I must say that this entire situation is unique to me, as well.”

Both men peered over at Harry, who had turned and was staring at Severus vacantly. It was the first time either man had seen the boy look away from the window on his own accord.   Slowly, Harry’s fingers twitched and his arm raised slightly, as if reaching for his potions professor.

Snape took this as an invitation and glided over to the boy, perching beside him on his stiff hospital bed. “How do I give this back to you?” he murmured. He took the outstretched hand, tentatively, and waited for the piece of soul to transfer back into its rightful owner. His smooth white fingers wrapped around Harry’s warm hand and Severus allowed their fingers to intertwine slightly.

Nothing happened.

Snape frowned in confusion at the mess of digits in front of him, “Albus, what do I do?”

“I only know one way that souls are transferred from one body to another,” the old man said slowly, pursing his lips, “and that is something that I’ve only seen in Azkaban.”

“The Dementor’s Kiss?” hissed Severus, in surprise.

Albus nodded solemnly, “Have you ever seen any other way?”

Severus reluctantly admitted to himself that he hadn’t. “You’re telling me, I need to...” he trailed off, momentarily lost in thought. The Dementor’s Kiss was a horrible thing to observe; lifeless creatures pouncing on their victim and taking someone’s soul straight out of their mouth. The vision was enough to give a grown man nightmares for months. Severus knew that for a fact, as he’d suffered with those dreams before.

He felt Albus’ hand rest reassuringly on his shoulder, “I’m sure returning someone’s soul to its rightful owner is a much more pleasant experience.” the old man mused

“’Pleasant’ is not a thought I associate with kissing Harry Potter,” Severus snarled.

‘Liar’ he thought to himself.   The young man in front of him was beautiful, even in his current state. Severus grit his teeth as he tried to ignore the haphazard way Harry’s black locks hung in his eyes endearingly.

Albus laughed heartily, “Severus, be that as it may, you can’t walk around carrying the boy’s soul forever.”

Closing his eyes and inhaling deeply, Severus slowly leaned forward. He had assumed, as with Dementor’s he would not actually need to make contact with the boy to make the exchange, but as he inched closer he realized that this may not be the case. Only when his thin lips brushed against the boys did Severus feel it happen. A charge ran through his body, and he felt a tingle and the energy flowed through his mouth. Opening his eyes, Severus watched in awe as blue sparkling light surrounded them, crashing towards Harry like waves.

Slowly, the light ebbed and waned. Reluctantly, Severus broke the chaste kiss and leaned back to observe the man in front of him. Harry’s eyes were closed, his face slightly flushed.

Severus gasped quietly as he felt the boys fingers tighten around his.
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Perchance to Dream