Adult-FanFiction.org : Harry Potter

Jaded	By : Lilyyuri Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Remus Views: 18219 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: The Harry Potter universe and characters are the sole property of J.K. Rowling. I make absolutely no profit out of writing any of these stories.

Chapter List
- 1-Jaded
- 2-2
- 3-3
- 4-4
- 5-5
- 6-6
- 7-7
- 8-8
- 9-9
- 10-10
- 11-11
- 12-12
- 13-13
- 14-14
- 15-15
- 16-16
- 17-17
- 18-18
- 19-19
- 20-20
- 21-21
- 22-22
- 23-23
- 24-24
- 25-25
- 26-26
- 27-27
- 28-28
- 29-29
- 30-30
- 31-31
- 32-32
- 33-33
- 34-34
- 35-35
- 36-36
- 37-37
- 38-38
- 39-39
- 40-40
- 41-41
- 42-42
- 43-43
- 39
- 40
- 41
JADED

For Summery, warnings, spoilers and disclaimers see chapter one.

To all of you who�ve been waiting patiently for the sex marathon- I�m sorry but I�ve been quite down lately, not really in the mood for writing at all let alone steamy sex scenes. While some of you would be very happy about it (yes, you know who you are�), the rest of you would just have to work your innovation and avant-garde minds and come up with the details yourselves. There are only two rules- no breath play and no blood play, the rest is up to you. Good luck.

Following Lenora�s review, I just wanted to say that I don�t see how Harry could have ended up with Ginny either and not because I think he should have ended up with a bloke (shocking as it may sound), but Ginny is too much of a sister, too close to him and besides, Harry spent pretty much his entire time at Hogwarts trying to deny his hero status and then he goes and hook up with his biggest fan? That just doesn�t make sense! And that concludes this week�s corner- 101 things that just don�t add up in the original version.

..oo00oo..

Chapter Forty: There are no victories, in all our histories, without love
(Title from �Mad about you� by Sting, album �The soul cages�)

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Harry sat and gazed around him at the lavishly decorated table of the main dining hall of Malfoy Manor, where they were currently sitting to a fantastic Christmas dinner. It was the first Christmas he could remember ever being truly happy and grateful. Coming to Malfoy Manor was somewhat of a shock to him, growing up in a tiny cupboard hadn�t really prepared him for the sheer size of Draco�s home. Hell, the dining room alone could have housed the entire Dursley�s home and there would still be room for them to dine!

The decision to hold Christmas dinner at the manor came from the delicate truce between Harry and Molly which more than called for a neutral ground to celebrate on and Malfoy Manor was nothing if it couldn�t provide �space�. Plus, it gave Draco ample opportunity to boast in his ancestral home, which, Harry suspected, was the main reason Draco agreed to host them all in the first place.

From across the table he caught Remus� eye and smiled warmly. The reason Harry was feeling so content lately had to be credited to Remus. Even Molly commented on the fact that Harry looked so much happier and healthier than he had in a long time. She, of course, contributed it to the dark lord�s demise. Harry smiled benignly during her fussing and bit the inside of his cheek to keep calm. Even thought he had mostly forgiven Molly for her previous behaviour he knew their relationship would never go back to the way it was before the war. Simply because Harry no longer saw her as a mother. Too many bad words and too much anger had passed between them to revert back to the cosy foster family feeling of before, but Harry was pleased with just having her support again, yet those little �Remus barbs� hurt. Molly hadn�t accepted them, she tolerated them, and had she been anyone else, Harry would never have put up with it.

The past couple of weeks, ever since he left the Hospital Wing had been everything Harry could ever ask for and more. The perfect Honeymoon. True, he and Remus haven�t gone anywhere exotic, as a matter of fact, for the first three days they haven�t left the house, their bedroom to be precise. It was quite a revelation for Harry to know that he could feel that way. To wake up every morning in the arms of his lover and spend the rest of the day with his only concerns in the form of food and how many orgasms one could squeeze in 24 hours.

But three days into things, Harry found himself trapped again. Not that he was complaining or by any means tired of Remus� body but every time they left the room to get food (and that was all too often for Harry�s liking as he never imagined sex to be so energy consuming and hunger-inducing), the dark walls were closing on him again and made his breath catch in his chest and finally he cracked.

Remus, on his part, was well aware of Harry�s growing anxiety, and knew he needn�t do anything more than just seat back and wait. When Harry came to him, practically demanding they go outside Remus was ready. Before Harry could even think of whining and ranting Remus sent him to get dressed and be ready to go out. Within ten minutes, they were both heading for the closest tube station. Remus� first �order of the day� turned out to be a trip to Brighton. Of course, Remus would have preferred it to be summer but even the cold and drizzling rain couldn�t dampen Harry�s spirit when his eyes first landed on the ocean.

Remus had to physically stop himself from apparating down to Surrey and hexing the Dursley�s to death for not allowing Harry the simple pleasure of appreciating the sea. But the sight of Harry�s face kept him rooted to the spot, nearly bringing tears to his eyes seeing his young man so excited by something that most people found mundane and obvious. They ended up standing on the pier for hours, Harry�s eyes never leaving the path of the waves as they crashed the shore, and Remus didn�t have the heart to rush him, and so he turned and leaned against the railing, engaging himself in a little game he used to play whenever he had to travel long-distances the muggle way- watching people and trying to guess they�re sexual orientation. Once the sun had set and the cold was too much to bear Remus practically dragged Harry into a small caf� on the pier for a cup of hot cocoa with a promise they�d return to the seaside come summer.

From then on, they spent every day in a similar fashion for the rest of the week. They�d head out to the nearest train station after a hearty breakfast and simply choose their course based on the town name that seemed most interesting that day. They would tour that town or nearby villages, mingle with the locals and always took lunch in the local pub. This had been by far Harry�s favourite part of their day. It was so refreshing being able to walk into a room without the entire place ogling and staring at his forehead. At those times he was not the Saviour, �The boy who lived�, here he was just Harry, a young man out on a trip with his lover. Nothing more, nothing less.

During that week Remus had discovered something rather curious about himself- jealousy. As one who always prided himself on not being affected by the green eyed monster it was quite disturbing to find himself actually growling at people who were looking too long, or just funny at his bonded. Harry, on the other hand, had a tremendous time over it, letting himself enjoy in full being on the other side of over-protectiveness. He wouldn�t go out right and flirt with people, after all, he did not fight the war and freed the Wizarding World from Voldemort only to have people ravaged by a jealous werewolf, but nevertheless, he didn�t stop any of them either.

After a week of that, Harry once more got bored. For the most part it was the weather, after all how much fun can one have travelling when all there is to see is snow and gales? So, once again locked in the house Harry decided on a new course of action- renovation. To Remus� credit, it could be said that he went along with whatever his borderline ADHD lover wanted, and even managed to find some enjoyment in it.

First off they had to get rid of all the �darkness� as Harry put it, and for that task he recruited a very enthusiastic Tonks and a very reluctant Snape. Between the four of them, and with a combination of spells and potions (some bordering on dark) they managed to purge the house in three days. For Harry it was a massive relief, as he was now able to walk around the house and breath freely. The walls were no longer emitting hatred and loath and the whole house looked brighter. Not that it made Harry want to move out any less, but it made staying put for now more tolerable.

Once the house was purged and cleaned Harry could finally see the potential. Plans, patterns, colours, fabrics and wood found their way onto the kitchen table at an alarming rate. After being yelled at for the third time that he was picking the wrong colour Remus decided, that for the sake of his relationship, and more importantly his sanity he�d leave Harry (being aided by a team of Draco, Seamus, Hermione and Ginny with occasional helpful tips from Molly and very useless ones from Arthur, Fred and George) to his own. And so he retreated to the library, the only place in the house Harry consented not to touch (Mostly because he knew that dealing with the place would mean actually going over all the books�) and took Jonah with him. The poor Happy Lily was anything but happy at the renovations. Even Harry�s obvious enthusiasm seemed to cause the poor plant to wilt and so Remus took it upon himself to make sure Jonah (and himself) survived the mess intact.

After Harry declared the house done, Remus and Jonah tentatively emerged from the library to �inspect the damage�. To Remus� utter surprise the house looked fabulous. His surprise came from the fact that he remembered what Lily and James� home looked like- a complete chaos. That was due to the fact that neither agreed to step down on his or her �artistic vision� and since both tastes were pretty much opposite the result was so horrid, Remus was actually glad Harry didn�t have any memories of it. But, as it turned out, Harry did not inherit his mother�s pristine and almost Spartan personality nor his father�s tendency towards flamboyant. In an effort to step away from anything Dursley, Harry chose clean lines, and absolutely no floral patterns.

Their bedroom, for example, was made in three different shades of blues, which blended and complimented each other perfectly, and still managed to create a relaxed atmosphere that made Remus want to never leave. The kitchen still retained it�s somewhat sombre atmosphere as Harry opted to leave the stone work untouched, but with the addition of several lamps and a couple of windows next to the ceiling that were level to the ground outside, the extra light was bouncing off the brass pots and made the place look much more lived in.

Harry�s pride and joy, though, was the drawing room. The first thing he did was to get rid of the horribly unjust family tree tapestry, which he then replaced with a whole one, curtsy of Draco who found one lying in one of the Manor�s storage rooms. Now, once more, Sirius� name, along with that of Tonks and her mother were proudly displayed at their rightful places- no more burnt holes of shame. The rest of the room was done in cheerful butter and canary yellow, balanced out with soft cream and polished chestnut wood panelling. The drawing room (which Harry doubted was ever used for that purpose) was now turned into a happy family room, where they could entertain guests or just spend time on their own. By the time Christmas rolled in, Harry could proudly say he was finally happy to live in Grimmauld Place.
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Remus wandered around the huge mansion, in search of Harry. After dinner ended the young man somehow eluded him, drifting away to socialize with others. Not that Remus minded much, but right now he just wanted to go home with Harry, only apparently finding someone in a place like Malfoy Manor required its own version of the Marauders� map. Remus closed his eyes and let his magic direct him to where its twin-signature shimmered. It was just one other benefit of the hand-bonding ritual- he could always find Harry, no matter what happened to the young man and regardless to where Remus� wand was at the time. This little feature became very useful in the days when brides of rich families were kidnapped for ransom.

Remus followed his magic, until he walked through a door and found himself in a vast library. Harry was standing near the fireplace, a smile gracing his beautiful face and a cup of eggnog in his hand chatting to Headmistress McGonagall. Remus took a moment to study his counterpart with a soft smile before he walked into the library and cleared his throat. Minerva McGonagall was a woman who saw a lot in her time, but even she couldn�t help but smile as Harry�s face lit up at the sight of his lover.

�Well, Mr. Potter, thank you for indulging an old woman on Christmas Eve.� She said briskly as she rose from her seat, not a trace of weariness or old age in sight, �I shall leave the two of you alone, please consider my offer.� Harry nodded and smiled, and Minerva swept past Remus both nodding respectfully at each other. Once they were left alone, Remus strode over to his young lover and took him in his arms. Harry snuggled closer, feeling warm and content, both by Remus� presence and the amount of eggnog he�s been drinking.

�Ready to go home?� Remus whispered into his hair and Harry hummed in agreement.

�Yeah, I�ll just nip to find Draco and tell him we�re leaving.� The thought of having to trek down the mansion in search of its master made Remus want to throw his head back and scream. Luckily he�d come prepared,

�No need.� He said happily, �I�ve already told him. He said he�ll see us on the Boxing Day brunch, oh, and he also said to tell you not to do anything he wouldn�t do.� Harry snorted at this,

�Great, that leaves us with nothing to do but argue over House-Elves rights�� He said as he started pulling Remus to the nearest fireplace. Fighting over House-Elves rights had been the highlight of the evening�s entertainment as far as he was concerned. Hermione and Draco just went for it with much gusto and enthusiasm- much to the embarrassment of the resident house-elves who were just trying to do their jobs and found themselves in the middle of a heated dispute. The look on the poor creature�s face when Hermione tried to physically stop him from going back to the kitchen was something that Harry would treasure for a long time.

Remus snickered and let Harry drag him towards the fireplace. Christmas dinner was nice enough, all their friends and pseudo-family there, but enough was enough and right now all Remus wanted was to have some alone time with Harry.

As soon as they landed in the stone kitchen of Grimmauld Place, Harry pulled Remus into the drawing room, throwing himself gracelessly over the sofa. With a lazy flick of his wrist the hearth erupted with high flames, and Harry sighed blissfully as their heat sank in.

�Shove over,� Remus growled lowly and Harry grinned at him, pulling his limbs up and clearing a space for his wolf to seat, snuggling into him as soon as he did. �So, what did Minerva want from you?� Remus asked, no longer able to stave his curiosity. Harry shrugged,

�She offered me a job.� He said quietly and Remus deflated a little,

�Oh, that, I was hoping it was something good�� Harry turned around in Remus� arms, looking at his wolf in astonishment,

�You knew about that?�

�Of course I did.� Harry returned to gaze a the fire,

�Then you know I�m not going to take it.� He said stubbornly and Remus smiled softly, hiding his face in Harry�s hair,

�Why not?�

�Because I won�t be responsible for you losing your job!� Harry cried, throwing his hands in exasperation. How could Remus think he would do such a thing- how could McGonagall for that matter?

�You won�t be.� Remus assured him, �She offered me the History of Magic gig.� Harry let out a snort,

�Finally getting rid of old man Binns, is she?�

�First thing she did.� Remus answered happily. The longest reign of boredom in Hogwarts was finally over. A part of Remus was actually itching to take the position, bring some life into the most boring subject in school. But most of him still wanted to teach DADA, which was far more exciting and much more up his alley.

�Do you even like History of Magic?� Harry asked, rather incredulously, knowing his lover better than most people gave him credit for. Remus shrugged,

�Not particularly, I always fancied myself more of a Divination teacher,� He drawled dreamily, �Do you think beads would suit me?� Harry chuckled,

�No, but a horse�s tail might.� Remus tightened his arms around his lover and smirked into his hair,

�Mmm, kinky.� Harry rolled his eyes, doing his best not to let himself get dragged into Remus� humour, but he let himself bask in the fact that Remus was not taking things too badly.

�You understand that I cannot take this job then. I would not be the reason you�re out of office.� He stressed the point, �If you�re going to take on the History of Magic position you�re going to end up all bitter like Snape.� Harry shuddered at the thought while Remus howled with laughter.

�Oh, I don�t mind, I�d look smashing in black. Just as long as I don�t have to marry Tonks.� Remus said happily,

�I don�t want to be a teacher.� Harry mused wonderingly, as if he only reached the conclusion.

�But I thought you liked it, you certainly did a great job with the DA.� Harry shrugged,

�That was different. Hermione bullied me into that, and besides, she did all the �proper teaching� I was just demonstrating.� Remus shook his head, not wanting to defy Harry�s words. Truth be told he was hoping Harry would not come to Hogwarts- not only because it would mean Remus had to switch jobs but mostly because he wasn�t exactly sure how having his lover with him day in and day out would work. Besides, unlike him, Harry had pretty much every option in the world open to him, as the saviour and as a very talented young man, and getting stuck in Hogwarts was just not worth it at this point of Harry�s life.

�So, what are you going to do?� He pressed gently, knowing that Harry was pretty much sick of being asked that question but since Remus hasn�t sprung it yet he figured he deserved to ask it at least once. Harry shrugged, knowing he would have to face the issue at some point. Apparently just being the hero of the magical world and being filthy rich did not consist as a valid occupation. Not that Harry was too keen on making much of his fame, but it would still be nice not to have everyone hovering over his shoulder so that he could take the time and weight his options.

�I don�t know. There�s always Seamus� suggestion.� Remus gasped theatrically,

�Oh, good gods, you two are going to open up a brothel!� Harry couldn�t help the chuckle that escaped him, because this was something that Seamus could come up with, and not as a complete lark either.

�Erm, close, a pastry shop actually.� Remus smiled at that, knowing that Harry had found his calling, and also knowing he�d try and fight it off nonetheless.

�That sounds great!� He cried out enthusiastically, and Harry�s eyes lit up,

�I know! There�s this magical school in Paris that offers a two years program for that, and it�s an international school so most of it is even in English!�

�Paris? As in France?� Harry rolled his eyes,

�Well, it certainly ain�t in Dorset!� Remus� smile broadened at Harry�s enthusiasm, while the young man was waving his hands excitedly, completely caught up in his dream, �And when we finish we plan to come back here and open up a shop in Diagon Alley! Seamus wanted to call it �buns� but I don�t really think that�ll work�� Remus laughed,

�Well, sounds like you�ve got it all worked out.� He pointed. Harry frowned, looking a little deflated,

�Not exactly,� He said slowly and Remus wanted to roll his eyes and smack the back of Harry�s head,

�What do you mean? You�ve got a name!� He pointed out, still trying to contain his laughter. If only Sirius and James knew� Having their son and godson opening a pastry-shop and calling it �Buns� was just the kind of thing that would make their year. Harry, on the other hand, sighed deep,

�It�s just that� What if�� He began, frowning again, not sure how to voice his concerns, when Remus cut in,

�What if the Doctor showed up and offered you to step into the TARDIS?� Harry threw his hands up in the air, completely frustrated,

�Argh! Why do you have to turn everything into a bloody joke?� He cried and Remus shook his head,

�Because you�re being ridiculous!� Harry gaped at him open mouthed, completely taken back by the harsh tone his lover was using, but Remus pressed on regardless, determined to deliver his point and make Harry see some sense at last, �Do you have any idea what you look like when you�re talking about doing this? For the love of Merlin, I don�t think I�ve seen you this happy in a long time and you�re going to throw it all for what? Me?� Harry opened his mouth to answer but Remus lifted his hand, �I just want you to be happy, Cailean, and this sounds like just the thing you need to make you happy.�

�I am happy. With you.� Harry said with a soft smile, that did nothing to convince Remus to drop the subject,

�Yes, but for how long?� Harry looked at him with shock and hurt written all over his face. He honestly thought they were past the stage of self-consciousness by now. Remus sighed and rubbed his forehead, trying to find the right words to explain himself, �How long are you going to be happy doing nothing? I know you, you need a challenge. You need something to keep you going, something that would make you want to get out of bed every morning, and that thing isn�t me.� Harry frowned and curled into himself, trying to make sense of what Remus was saying,

�What� I don�t understand�� He confessed lowly at last,

�I mean I�m the way, the means to help you in your cause. I�m going to support you in everything you decide to do but I�m hardly a goal to strive to. You already got me, hand-fastened and all, I�m not going anywhere!� Harry let a lop-sided smile to spread on his face, Remus wasn�t going anywhere alright! �What other objections could you possibly have?�

Harry sighed, he knew he was being silly, but daydreaming of a pastry shop in Diagon Alley was one thing, and thinking of what he�d have to do and what he�d have to sacrifice on the way to that dream was a different thing altogether. �I just� There are so many things that could��

�Stop it!� Remus cut through his words forcefully and Harry lifted his eyes to see the stubborn set of Remus� mouth, �Stop stalling and finding excuses not to do what you want!�

�I can�t spend two whole years without seeing you!� Harry yelled, and Remus leaned back in satisfaction, glad that he could finally drag the confession out of his lover.

�Did they teleport Paris to the moon while I wasn�t looking?� He asked lightly and Harry snarled at him, only to receive a broad smile and a light peck on his nose for his efforts,

�This is the time we�re supposed to work on our relationship.� He insisted,

�Make it work under �normal circumstances�?� Remus asked with a slightly cynical tone. Not that he was against working on their relationship but he knew that if Harry didn�t have at least an idea for later the �normal circumstances� would soon turn into trying to keep their relationship from falling completely apart because they�ll get on each other�s nerves all too soon. �Well, as it turns out I�m pretty much free for the next, oh, six months.� He added in a casual tone,

�Really?�

�Yes, the school won�t be reopened until September which means I�m free as a roaming wolf in the Arctic.� Remus grinned, and Harry bit his lip in anticipation,

�So� You�re saying you want to come to Paris with me?� Remus pretended to give it some thought,

�Hmm, I don�t know� six months in the most romantic city in the world with my beautiful mate� I think I�m going to need a bit more time to mull it over�� He said pensively just before Harry jumped him and started tickling him to show his disapproval of the sarcastic answer. Remus tried his best to avoid the flailing hands while trying to catch his breath from laughing,

�Git!� Harry said with a smiling pout as they settled into a proper cuddle on the sofa a while later. Remus ran his hand in Harry�s messy locks, the idea to go to Paris was making him giddier by the second. Perhaps he should grow a little goatee and start wearing berets and black turtlenecks� Or maybe he should just skip anything that would give the French any reason to kick him out of their country� He looked down at Harry�s pouting lips,

�Did anyone ever tell you, you look cute when you�re flustered?� He teased lightly. Harry rolled his eyes,

�Lily, constantly.� Remus sniggered,

�Speaking of�� He started tentatively, but Harry was ready for the question,

�I think we should go visit them tomorrow.� He decided, �It could be our Christmas day tradition, going to visit Lily, James and Sirius.�

�Damn, and I wanted our Christmas day tradition to be blueberries pancakes and blowjobs�� Harry shook his head as he pulled himself free from his lover, and gave Remus a commanding look,

�I�m going to fire-call Seamus and tell him we�re going to Paris and when I get back I expect to find you in our bed, naked!� Remus straightened on the sofa, bringing his right hand to his forehead in a tight salute,

�Yes sir! Whatever you say, sir!� He cried happily. Harry rolled his eyes and left the room to the sound of his lover rolling laughter.
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A/N: Er� can you tell what I�ve been watching lately? (Grin). It was mostly �Torchwood��

McGonagall decided that in light of the war that started during the summer the school was unsafe to be opened. Therefore all the students would skip a year (much to the annoyance of all, naturally), but the seventh year (Ginny�s class) would receive special NEWT�s depending on what they wanted to major in (it�s a bit complicated and not overly important to the story line but if any of you feels like they need some extra explaining, write to me and I�ll be happy to oblige.)

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