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Be Careful in the Dark	By : SilentCall Category: Harry Potter > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 40145 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 44
- 45
- 46
Chapter 46: Laid Bare
Severus: “If you weren’t Hermione, then you knew far too much about me. You think I don’t know what it feels like to be played? Please. You were [insert fancy word for good] at hitting my buttons. I was in terrible danger. If you were Hermione…”
Hermione got a flash of a embarrassment/shame/want/hate that made her eyes water. “Severus…” Hermione frowned and shook her head. She thought about it for a moment. “Then you’re a… an…” she sifted through the barrage of feelings… “an old pervert who…”
“Desires someone half his age—less—who used to be his student…” Severus made circled the pointer finger on his left hand and then popped it into his forehead, as if hitting himself with a wand-spell.
“And did you desire me when I was a student?” Hermione asked, staring at him.
“In the beginning, you were a child. So, no. Of the many flaws and perversions I have, pedophilia is not among them. No, it was later.” He shifted and looked away.
A wave of hate/shame/lust hit her and with it came a few fuzzy images, as if snatched from his memory.
Severus rubbed his head. “This is unbearable.”
“I’m not having a great time over here, myself.” Hermione said, rubbing her own head. “It wasn’t until that business with Lucius, was it?”
Severus nodded and Hermione got slammed again with his emotions: shame/hate/lust/rage/shame/rage.
“Gods, control your emotions.” Hermione growled.
Instead of answering, Severus’ feelings hit her again: resentment/frustration/sorrow/apology. He growled, then, saying, “I can’t seem to help it.”
She could see Severus’ perspective of the scene that took place in Malfoy Manor… his hand resting on her leg. The image of accompanied by a barrage of feelings, desire and anticipation chief among them. “What you’re telling me is that… is that the fact that I was tied up on a bed did it for you?” Hermione asked.
Irritation/frustration.
“Severus, just tell me!” Hermione snapped.
“A lifetime of silence cannot be broken so easily!” Severus snarled, glaring at her. “How am I supposed to say these things out loud! It’s so… gauche.”
Hermione gritted her teeth. “Then feed me the feelings more slowly.”
Severus frowned and shook his head.
“We have to figure out how this thing works, anyway. Why not now?” Hermione asked, trying to send him her feelings of curiosity and frustration.
Severus sighed and hit her with a dose of hopelessness/irritation/resentment. Haltingly, in fits and starts, Severus fed her his feelings. Sometimes there were pictures, sometimes not.
After a while, Severus closed his eyes and leaned his head against the wall, tilting his head up to the ceiling. Even his body was angled away from her.
Hermione was sure how much time had passed before she finally said, “so… to sum up… out loud… you found me seriously annoying as a student and barely differentiable from Harry… whom you hate because Harry’s father stole the woman you loved… the woman whom you actually lost because you were a selfish git… you feel you caused her death… but Voldemort did too… and,” Hermione paused to run her hands over her face. “And the day you saw me at Malfoy Manor… I reminded you of her… because you knew I would fight Lucius tooth and nail… there was even an outside chance I would have escaped on my own… but I was also helpless and tied up which is a turn on.”
As she said this last part, Severus let out a muffled groan and she got a lance of red-hot embarrassment from him.
She made a short sound at him, “pfft”, before continuing. “But, then, afterwards, I put you on the defensive. You thought I might be punishing you for touching me… by asking you to sleep next to me, with no intention of sex…” Hermione paused before she said the next part, as it was the most garbled of all of the image/feeling bursts she had gotten from him. “And the idea I was trying to punish you was a turn on… because you’re a selfish git who deserves it… even though you were quite certain that I was doing nothing of the kind… which was even more of a turn on??”
After a moment, Severus gave her a curt nod and she got a flicker of agreement feeling from him.
“Severus, that is quite an intellectual corkscrew you got yourself into. No wonder sleeping with Shadow wasn’t any fun.” Hermione said, shaking her head. She couldn’t help the surge of pity that followed her improved understanding of Severus Snape’s emotional… fucked-up-ed-ness.
“Don’t you dare!” He hissed at her, his voice thick. “Don’t you dare pity me!”
“Don’t you fucking tell me what to feel, you ass!” Hermione yelled back, suddenly resentful she had to deal with his constant prickliness, even in her own head. “Accept a feeling that isn’t hate for once in your spiteful little life!”
Severus flinched and Hermione got hit with a wave of fuck you!/anger/resentment/ shame/apology/fuck you?.
Hermione let out an exasperated sigh and thought, “he wants to fuck now?” Something of that thought must have passed to Severus because he snapped his eyes open and stared at her. She got a quick burst of devious/sly/don’t look at me before Severus sneered at her.
“Let’s spend a little time practicing our new found skill on you, Hermione Jane Granger.” Severus said, his voice as cold as it had ever been in the front of a classroom. “Tell me, what did you think of me as a professor?”
Hermione felt a flush of surprise and then anger. “Why would you want to know that?” She asked, frowning.
“I have to explain why I want to know something? You certainly didn’t explain it to me.” Severus said, shooting her smug/certain/bitter feelings.
Hermione sighed heavily. “In the beginning, I didn’t think much of anything because I was too busy gawking at all the awesome magic!” She said this last part breathy and high-pitched, as she had said in her head a hundred times every day for the first weeks at Hogwart’s.
Severus snorted and Hermione got a burst of amusement from him.
“And then I thought you were sooooo smart, because you knew soooo much magic.” Hermione said and Severus rolled his eyes. She shrugged and continued, “and then I was irritated when I realized you really did favor the Slytherins. Then I was even more irritated when I realized there were other professors at the school who were just as smart as you but talked a whole lot less shit.”
“So why did you continue to raise your hand even when I mocked you without end?” Severus growled at her. She got a burst of resentment/rage.
“You sure do have a lot of resentment and rage floating around in the skull of yours.” Hermione said with a sigh. “Because it was school, Severus, and I still wanted to learn.”
Severus frowned. /confusion/
“And then I learned some of the things you were doing with the Order of the Phoenix and what Dumbledore thought of you and I, I respected you a lot after that.” Hermione said, feeling uncomfortable telling him this. He had been so goddam mean to her, but she’d believed that someone who fought Voldemort couldn’t be all bad.
Severus tilted his head at her again. “You’re hiding something? What is that I feel?”
Hermione shifted around and tried to stuff the feelings back in her own head.
“Hermione, just tell me!” Severus said, lifting an eyebrow at her as he threw her words back at her.
“You talk to your books.” Hermione said, exhaling sharply.
“What? I do not!” Severus snapped his torso upright and glared at her.
“You do.” Hermione pressed her lips together and nodded. Severus shook his head once, firmly. Hermione continued implacably, “cauldrons, too. I guess, to be fair, you mutter at books and cauldrons, but you do. It’s… endearing.”
“Why would you hide that, you strange, strange child?” Severus asked, staring at her.
“Because it’s so human and you seem to hate it when I point out that you’re human.” Hermione said, lifting an eyebrow back him.
“So when did you first decide you wanted to shag me?” Severus asked it snidely, but she got a burst of surprise/confusion.
Hermione blinked twice and looked at him. “Did you think I wanted to shag you because you were my teacher?”
Severus shrugged, “yes, actually.”
Hermione stared at him for a moment. “Do students often want to shag you because you’re a teacher?”
“The Slytherins, certainly, but over the years, other students have…” Severus stopped and frowned. Hermione got a burst of irritation/amusement/exasperation. He continued, “I can’t even call those clumsy fumblings advances. It happens to all the teachers. Well, all the corporal ones.”
Hermione felt, once again, utterly confused. “All the teachers? Really? How did I miss this?”
Severus shrugged and pursed his lips. She got a burst of amusement and a fuzzy picture of her with an insipid expression, trailing after Gilderoy Lockhart. He sent Hermione a small cluster of smug/amused feelings. “There are Ravenclaw boys, and a few girls, who are quite certain Minerva McGonagall should school them in all things. I particularly enjoyed catching them lurking outside her rooms.” Severus said, giving a rare broad grin.
Hermione stared at him with her mouth hanging open and then threw back her head and howled in laughter. “I love it!” She said, laughter dying to snorting giggles.
“Don’t think I didn’t notice you managed to avoid answering my question.” Severus said, pointing a finger at her. “Spill.”
Hermione thought. When did I first notice Severus was attractive? She thought about sitting in his kitchen, watching his hands move around to cradle a cup of tea. She felt an embarrassed flushed spark through her when she realized that she had probably sent him an image.
She got a burst of rigid/cold/rage and shook her head as if to rid herself of the feeling.
Severus snarled, “you were first attracted to me under a coercive lust spell? There could be after effects! Why didn’t you tell me that? That’s… I raped you!”
Hermione held up a hand as if to ward of the blow of Severus’ feelings of sorrow, loss, and anger. “Stop, Severus, stop. Please. It wasn’t a coercive spell. It was just a low-level arousal potion. I administered it to myself.”
“You… the kidnap was staged?” Severus asked, frowning. Ofcourse/embarrsment/foolish/stupid “How?”
Hermione shrugged. “It wasn’t staged, just carefully carefully planned. I taunted Malfoy into kidnapping me, then I sexed him up and imperio’d him.”
Severus blinked at her a couple of times and Hermione got hit with a feeling of surprise/respect. “You sexed Lucius up?” Severus finally said.
“Yeah. And, it’s not like I was gonna enjoy it otherwise and he had to believe I was or he’d never drop his guard. So…” Hermione held her hands out in front of her and shrugged.
“But if it was a potion…” Severus said.
Hermione let out an exasperated sound. “You asked me when I first noticed you were attractive. I answered. I wasn’t coerced. Jesus.”
“And what about the time you showed up drunk on Dark Magics?” Severus asked.
Hermione shook her head rapidly. “I don’t want to talk about that.” She couldn’t stop the panic and fear she’d felt, forced to be Genevieve, to see the future against her will, to kill someone she/Genevieve loved. She’d broken that girl’s life. It didn’t matter that it was going to get broken anyway.
“Oh, now you get to pick?” Severus asked, glaring at her.
“I’m not talking about it. I don’t care what you think. Ask me something else, anything else.” Hermione said, shoving the anxiety down.
“What do you really think of me?” Severus asked quickly, as if pouncing on her.
Hermione lifted her eyebrows in surprise. What a surprising question for him to ask. She took a moment to look him over: lanky hair, pale skin, sharp nose, long and lean body. She thought about what he looked like when he muttered at a cauldron, telling it to behave and she felt a wave of affection. Oh good lord.
“What is that feeling your sending me?” Severus asked, frowning. “Is that pity?” He tilted his head to look at her and then shook his head.
Hermione stared at him, wondering how it was he couldn’t know. With worry unfurling in her belly, she asked, “Severus, what did loving Lily feel like?”
Severus stared at her and then a wave of emotion hit her: blackness/rage/need/want/need/ need/mine/need/protect/care/mine. She flinched back, as if he had struck her.
****
Severus asked Harry, voice feeling hollow inside his head, “what does it feel like to love?”
Harry stared at him and then looked away. After a minute, feelings swam over him and Severus blinked in surprise. Hermione sent her feelings so differently, it was as if they fluttered up into his chest from inside him.
Severus paddled around in the waves of soft, sticky feelings that mostly felt like pity to him and felt as if the inside of his head was bruised. This was love? It felt much like the feelings from Hermione, not the same but still. Had he never really loved anyone in his entire life? The thought made him feel sick.
Severus got a wave of shock/pity/confusion/relief from Harry. He started and looked around. It was time to go.
Harry pulled his eyebrows together. “Severus, why do I feel like that’s the first time you’ve ever felt love?”
“Don’t be daft, brat.” Severus said, unable to stop feeling embarrassed, ungrateful, and so very sick. A lifetime’s effort to keep his emotions inside was all for naught. He was laid bare before this smug little bastard and he had only himself to blame.
****
[Severus pops up on Hermione, aggressive/angry sex someplace semi-public.]
“You love me?” Severus asked, sounding like someone strangled him. Hermione got a burst of pleasure/smug/queasy/rage.
She lifted one shoulder and dropped it, turning her eyes downward to fuss with her clothes.
“This is not a game. Please just tell me.” Severus sounded weary and the burst of emotion matched it.
“It… well… I…” Hermione exhaled sharply. “It is the beginning for me. Maybe more than a beginning but not,” she shrugged. “I’ve never loved a romantic partner with my whole heart before, but it feels like what I feel could grow into that.”
“And what I felt for Lily…” Severus paused for a long time and Hermione couldn’t stop her horror from welling up. Severus continued, “it wasn’t love?”
Hermione flinched as Severus’ feelings of bewilderment, loneliness, and rage burst into her head. She hesitated before she said, “I wouldn’t say that. There was love… but it wasn’t healthy. It was as if you’d kill her as soon as be with her.”
Severus looked away and Hermione knew he was terrified. Finally, he said, “Then, I do not know if I can love.”
Hermione nodded her head. “I know.”
Severus turned on his heel and walked away. Razor-sharp sadness rose up in her chest and she gasped at the intensity of Severus’ feeling. Then it was gone and so was Severus.
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- 46
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Be Careful in the Dark