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Research and Development Part I; Hunger	By : Aubrey Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male Views: 8765 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 4
- 5
- 6
TITLE: Research and Development Part V; Testing

AUTHOR: StarryGazer

EMAIL: foppagal@yahoo.com

PAIRING: Remus/Harry

RATING: R

FEEDBACK: Always appreciated, feel free to send to the above
address

DISCLAIMER: Belongs to JKR. No profit. No infringement etc.

SUMMARY: Harry wants Remus. Remus wants Harry. It should be
simple, right? Left alone at Grimmauld Place, Harry begins to realize what it
means to be bonded�and what it means to be bonded to someone who cannot always
be with him.

CATEGORY: (Drama / First Time / Humor / Hurt-Comfort / Romance)

BETAS: The Succulent ShadowPhoenix, The Energizing Elizabeth

NOTES:
If you REALLY like Remarrys, I urge you to check out the phenomenal
everythingIsaid�s list of EVERY REARRY EVER WRITTEN, which can be found at
wishforthemoon on Live Journal. It is the most fantastic thing since sliced
bread. Really. Probably since before that, since sliced bread can�t compare to
a good Remarry. So everythingIsaid deserves to be worshipped for this truly
astounding accomplishment.
```
THANK YOUS:            At the bottom of the page. 
```
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Part Five: Testing

Remus
carried Harry back to his own chambers around two in the morning, after doing a
cleaning charm on them both. He encountered Molly Weasley in the hall, and was
surprised by his own calm demeanor. �Harry will be staying in my room for a
while,� he told her smoothly. �He�s not been doing well on his own.� Which
wasn�t exactly a lie�it was just a Gryffindor�s way of telling the truth
and still breaking the rules.

�Poor
thing,� she murmured. �I know I shouldn�t speak ill of the dead�� she must have
caught him glaring at this point, because her voice faltered a moment before
continuing. �But�well�I just�I�m glad he has you, now. I know you�ll
take good, responsible care of him. Really, Remus�of anyone who might be
in charge of him, I�m glad it�s you. You�ll be such a good role model, I just
know it.�

And then
she made her way to check on Ron, leaving Remus to slip into his room, trying
to hold back slightly hysterical laughter.

He woke
several times during the night with an unfamiliar weight against his side, or a
much-too-light arm across his middle. He ached every time, missing the
accustomed burden of Sirius sprawled half-across him, taking up his eighty
percent of the bed. He missed Sirius�s snores, and even the frightened way he
muttered things in his sleep, like he was trapped in the nightmare of Azkaban
Prison again. Remus sighed a little. Harry was so light and gentle and young.
It wasn�t�bad, but it was terribly foreign, and now, at night,
surrounded by the routine creaks and groans of the Black family home, Remus
felt sharply nostalgic. The dull pain in his soul cried out to Sirius�not
necessarily even to hold him, to kiss him, but just�just for him to be,
again�and the werewolf had to swallow against a suddenly tight throat.

It was odd,
now he came to think about it, but he didn�t want Sirius back as a lover
so much as a friend. And it wasn�t the fact that he wasn�t here with
Remus now that hurt so badly as it was the fact that he wasn�t anywhere.
No more Sirius Black. Gone, like, like�something that left quickly, Remus
supposed, coughing a little on the pain. And Remus was all that was left. Only
during the dark of night could Lupin allow himself to be self-indulgent and
wrap himself in a cloak of pity. Abandoned. Alone.

A sudden
moan near his shoulder and Harry�s small hand flexing instinctively on his arm
brought Remus back from himself. The noise was a small, soft mewl of distress,
and the werewolf remembered that he was not the only one to be missing someone;
he was not the only one lonely, and aching, and overwhelmed. The quiet whimper
morphed abruptly into a cry of pain, and Remus quickly had the boy in his arms,
shaking him gently.

There was
no effect except that the boy�s eyes seemed to pinch up in pain. When Harry�s
hand flew to his forehead and his body curled into a tight ball of agony, Remus
remembered belatedly that Harry had larger problems than he himself did. And he
was supposed to be taking care of Harry, for Merlin�s sake. �Harry?
Harry, can you hear me? Harry. Wake up.� He shook the boy more roughly, trying
to rouse him from his nightmare. Luckily, it did not take him as long as it
would have taken Ron to realize that Harry could not be woken by normal means,
and he quickly found his wand. �Evigilus!� he said, and the boy�s eyes
flew open. He sat up gasping.

�W-what happened?� he stuttered in a weak
voice, looking wildly around.

�Too much
sex and not enough Occlumency,� Remus told him grimly. �It was my fault; I
should have remembered. You had a Voldemort-induced dream, I think.� He
summoned a glass of water. �Can you remember any of it?�

Harry
shuddered. �I don�t particularly want to. Just that there was a meeting. He
was�happy, I guess. No�I would kind of more say that he was�amused. He kept
laughing. He�s going to do something.� He looked up out of large, helpless
eyes. �He�he said it would be a good joke��

Remus
frowned sharply. �Can you remember anything else? Any details? Can you remember
anyone else present? Faces, voices, posture?�

Harry shook
his head slowly. �No�it�s all very fuzzy now. Mostly all I remember is�fear. I
felt like someone was chasing after me, but I wasn�t running or anything. And
nothing seemed to be pursuing me, but that�s what it felt like; it was
like someone was reaching a hand out to snatch me up. He was amused, but
I was terrified.�

Remus
wrapped strong arms around the boy. �All right. Don�t upset yourself more by
thinking about it. It can�t be helped, at any rate. Here, just lean back into
me and breathe deeply. All right?�

Harry
nodded, the back of his head resting on Lupin�s chest. Lupin�s body was warm,
and his arms an anchor to reality. He let his eyes slide shut, savoring the
feel of the werewolf�s tender embrace and strong heartbeat. He let a sigh out
through his nose. �I�I�m sorry that I�m not better at Occlumency. It�s just
that Snape won�t tell me what I�m supposed to be doing. He just attacks me and
says, �Fight me off.� He won�t tell me how I�m supposed to do it�other
than, �Clear your mind.� How can I do that? You can�t shut your brain
off like it�s a faucet,� he complained.

Remus
thought this over. �Let�s try something. Now. Do as I tell you.�

The
reaction Harry�s body had to this command was rather embarrassing. �Um. All
right,� he agreed cautiously.

�Keep your
eyes shut. Breathe deeply and evenly.� Remus was stroking Harry�s arms and
chest as he spoke. �Now I want you to pay attention to the sounds around you.
Do you hear the cricket outside?� There was a cricket, chirping
intermittently, and Harry smiled. He was about to say, �yes,� when Remus
covered his mouth with one hand. �No, Harry. Just nod.� Harry did, trying not
to rub against Remus, which he really wanted to do, at the moment. It didn�t
matter. Remus still knew what Harry was thinking. �Harry. Stop that. I need you
to concentrate. This is important; don�t you dare think about disobeying me.�
Harry let out a frustrated whimper at this, and Remus sighed. �Are you having a
difficult time taking this seriously?�

�Noooo,� Harry moaned. �It�s just.
That. Could you be bossy some other time? Like�when you don�t want me to
focus on something besides my sexual fantasies?�

Remus
stiffened. �What�do you�Harry,� he stuttered, sounding just a little bit
scandalized. �Are you trying to tell me that that�excites you?�

�Well�yeah. I mean; it�s not like I can help it or anything. You make me
sit here all close to you with my eyes shut and then you go and use your husky bedroom
voice and you start getting�strict, telling me to do things and not
disobey you�yeah, I can�t help it; I�m getting kind of hot.�

Remus hid a
smile. He had to remind himself several times that it was just the bond; Harry
would ordinarily not have found this a turn on. But it was still awfully
flattering. �All right,� he managed, trying to choke back his amusement and
rising desire for the boy�who was just as randy as he was, at the moment. It
took him a few minutes to realize that he�d completely lost his train of thought.
�If you do this for me now, I promise we�ll do anything you want, later,� he
offered, and felt the boy shudder violently with desire.

�Anything?� Several of Harry�s more improbable�not to mention
kinky�fantasies ran quickly through his head.

�Only if
you do well tonight,� Remus bargained, although he was suddenly distinctly
curious about what sort of sexual appetites Harry had. If �bossy� was a turn
on, how would he feel about discipline, bondage, role-playing? With a gasp, he
had to push the boy away. They were never going to be able to sleep if
this kept up! Harry kept his eyes closed, but reclined against a pillow with a
far too cheeky half smile on his face. Remus growled at him. �Shut up,�
he ordered huffily.

Harry only
laughed. �I didn�t say anything,� he protested.

�Yes,
well, your face said it for you. So tell your face to shut up, then. Impudent
little siren that you are. Now. We are going to try something, and it
does not involve sex. Got it?� Remus shut his own eyes, trying to capture his
own calm. �Quiet now, Harry. Listen to the noises of the night. Listen to the
regular rhythms around you. Can you hear your breath? Can you feel your chest
rise and fall? Focus on that. Can you hear the clock on the wall? Listen to it,
Harry; breathe with the clock. Two ticks in, two ticks out. Focus on the sound.
Focus on the night. Nothing else exists; not even me. There is no reason to be
frightened or angry or happy or excited. There is only the clock. Breathe
in�.breathe out�listen to it, Harry. Everything is dark and still. Everything
outside of your heartbeat is silent. No one can get inside your head, because
nothing exists outside your head. There is only your heartbeat. There is only
your breath. Breathe in, Harry. Breathe out.� As Remus spoke, he could feel the
boy�s body becoming more and more relaxed, melting into a sort of puddle beside
him on the bed. He kept speaking in a lulling, low voice, repeating himself,
until he was certain Harry had fallen asleep. Just before Remus drifted off
himself, he wondered why every aspect of his life had to be so difficult. Why
the hell had he gone and fallen for someone destined to save the world? After
grumbling to himself for awhile, while he teetered right on the edge of sleep,
a tiny voice inside his head seemed to whisper an answer to him. He would not
remember it when he awoke, but at the time, it seemed to say, ��because you
have something. Something worthwhile to
offer him�� Remus snuffled a bit as his mind was tangled up by a passing
dream. Somewhere in his soul, a long-forgotten sense of pride twitched, just a
little.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The next
morning, Remus discovered there was Order business to attend to. It was an
errand outside of Grimmauld Place, and the werewolf found that he was not
pleased with the news. Neither was Harry.

�But you promised
we could do anything I wanted,� the boy told him, in what could
only be described as an obnoxious whine. �Didn�t I do good? Did I do something wrong?�
He glared at the man, who was in the process of dressing himself to leave.

Remus knew
the boy was only trying to bait him, which was the reason he was able to answer
serenely. �Well, Harry. Not �good.� Well. And yes, you did well. You did
wonderfully. I said we would do anything you wanted, but I did not
specify when. And you shall be rewarded at a later time. I do not wish
to have to explain to you, every time this occurs, why it is important that I
fulfill my duties as directe und understand that in many ways you are still a
child,� he added. �But I find it rather irksome that just now, you happen to be
acting like one.� He gave Harry a stern look, and the boy looked abashed.

�All
right, then. I understand that it�s your responsibility and all. But�Remus��
Harry trailed off, looking unhappy.

�I�ll miss
you, too,� the werewolf sighed, looking rather distracted.

�I�ll miss
you a lot,� Harry said in a quiet voice, looking disturbed. �It�s
just�we haven�t been away from each other, before�I�m kind of�I. I don�t know
how I�ll react, or anything. The further you are away from me, the more it
hurts. It hurts a lot. I feel. Like you need to be in the same room. I feel.
Like someone is ripping me open, whenever you�re not there.�

Remus
finally turned to look at the boy�really look at him. He gave this some
thought. Harry was right, after all. The bond made them crave each other�s
company�need each other�s company, like air or water. They could not be
apart for long. �Harry�� he finally whispered. �We won�t know how this will
affect us until we experiment with it a little bit. I will be very aware of how
I�m feeling, knowing that it likely correlates to whatever you are feeling. And
if it becomes singularly painful, I will make poste haste to be at your side. I
will try not to go too far, and I will try not to be gone too long. But Harry,
it is very important that we test the limits of the bond, and also that
we be strong in the face of it�s limitations. We cannot simply accept what is
given us. We do not have that luxury. Do you understand?�

Harry
watched him unhappily. He didn�t understand, not really. What he knew, really knew,
was that being away from Remus would be hell. Sheer, absolute hell. But Remus
felt that it was important, and that was what mattered. He had to trust the
man. Maybe he wouldn�t like it, but he would do it, all the same. �How long do
you think you�ll be away?� he murmured softly.

�Perhaps
overnight,� Remus replied on the exhalation of a breath. Harry blanched. Lupin
could read his face like a book. It said, �That long?� Remus sat beside
the boy, running his fingers up and down the nape of Harry�s neck. �I
understand. Trust me when I say that I will not let it�get out of control. I
know this will be difficult, but you are strong, and I believe you will
survive. Remember, I will be longing for you, as well.�

At this,
Harry began to get just a little sulky. �I really doubt you�ll be
missing me the way I�ll miss you,� he grated. �You�ll have other things
to occupy your mind, and you won�t be stuck in thorrhorrible house, all
alone.� It was true; Ron and Hermione were going to Diagon Alley with Mr. and
Mrs. Weasley to pick up their school supplies, but Harry was not allowed to
accompany them. �Besides, you�re not a sixteen year old boy with a
raging libido.� Harry flushed a little as he said it, but he let it stay said.
�And the bond only makes it worse.�

�I know
that, Harry,� Remus replied calmly. Would nothing ruffle the man? �And
the bond is affecting me, as well. A werewolf�s senses are particularly
sharp, and I�can become stimulated just from your scent. Don�t try to tell me
you�re the only one suffering. And although my mind will hopefully be
occupied, I anticipate some difficulty keeping it on the set task. And no, I won�t
be all alone and that, too, is something I envy you. How much fun do you think
it will be for me, trying to hide my yearnings for you from the other Order
members?�

Harry
looked slightly mollified by this, but still sighed exaggeratedly. �I don�t
want to sleep in the room with Ron again, but I have the feeling I�m going to hate
sleeping in your room without you. This whole stupid house is so big and
creepy; I always feel like someone�s watching me.�

Remus gave
him a wicked smile. �Pretend someone is watching you,� he suggested. He
placed a small kiss behind the youth�s ear. �Pretend that I�m watching
you, and that I can�t touch you, but I�d like to watch you touch yourself�� He
grinned at Harry�s groan, and nipped quickly at his earlobe. �I want you to
touch yourself while I�m gone,� he breathed heatedly, his mouth less than an
inch away from Harry�s skin. �I want you to imagine all the games we�re going
to play when I return.� He paused to slide his tongue in and out of the boy�s
ear a timetimes, earning a succession of fingernails embedded suddenly into his
thigh, clenching and unclenching in the manner of a cat. He listened to Harry�s
rapid breath for a few moments before continuing. �I want you to give serious
considera to to what you�ll want as your reward. After all, there aren�t going
to be very many times I offer to do whatever you like. I think you ought to
give thought to what you�d like to do and to how long you think you can hold
out, and you probably want to think of a plan to make yourself last as long as
possible. Oh, and don�t forget your Occlumency before going to sleep.� He pulled
away, still smiling in a vaguely hungry fashion.

�What
about you?� Harry panted, hands drawing patterns on the man�s chest. �How are you
going to manage to hold out?� A forceful mouth abruptly ate off whatever else
he had to say, the velvet heat of Remus�s tongue driving in and claiming
Harry�s breath as his own.

Remus
finally pulled back and stood, doing up the last few buttons on his shirt. �Oh,
don�t worry about me. I have enormous willpower, not to mention werewolf
stamina. Now, I�d better be on my way. You will behave yourself, while
I�m gone?� He gave Harry a warning look, and the boy moaned with frustration
before nodding. �Good.� He bent and gave the youth another kiss, this one much
more gentle. �Take care of yourself, Green Eyes.� He stepped into the hall, and
Harry followed him to the front door, where he was joined by Shacklebolt.
�Ready, Kingsley?� The man nodded, and waved a goodbye to Harry before leaving
the house. �Oh, and Harry?� Lupin called over his shoulder in a deceptively
casual voice, �Don�t forget. I�m watching you.� He strode out, shutting the
door behind him.

Damn
dirty werewolf, Harry snarled in the privacy of his head. I can�t
BELIEVE he just did that to me. Then another thought occurred to him.
Ron and Hermione would be in Diagon Alley until evening, probably, and the
house was almost deserted. With a disgruntled huff, he went to spend the day in
Remus�s room, where his hand was going to make a damn poor substitute for
Remus�s mouth.

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Once in
the sweltering heat of Remus�s enclosed bedroom, Harry paced restlessly awhile.
He couldn�t really draw the curtains; it would be far too exposing. But the
house was so hot in the lazy summertime that the idea of curling up amongst the
thick blankets of the bed was not to be borne. Even looking at the wool
and cotton made Harry feel sticky and uncomfortable. He tried pawing through
the werewolf�s things, just to find something personal enough to give a sort of
attachment to the absent man, but there really wasn�t anything. Remus did not
have money, and his possessions were few. Oh, well. Harry supposed the
bond would just have to be enough of a link to Lupin.

Shoulders
slumping, he went and sat in the lumpy armchair near the fireplace. He missed
his�what was he? This question shocked Harry down a different avenue of
thought. Remus wasn�t his boyfriend, exactly�he was much too old to be
referred to in such a silly, trifling manner. And even though they were bonded,
they weren�t exactly married. Harry couldn�t call Remus his husband, and the
thought of doing so was extremely odd. Mate? It sounded a tad impersonal, like
the bond was the only important thing they shared. His lover, then. Remus
Lupin is the lover of Harry Potter, he tried out for size. He had to admit
he liked the sound of that. It carried with it a promise of romance and
emotional fulfillment, as well as physical gratification and helped to
counterbalance the cold matter-of-factness of the bond itself. He smiled a
little.

So�I
miss my lover. Harry was unhappy to find that he did already miss
Remus; he missed him rather desperately. He was beginning to realize that the
bond�s forced emotional dependence was every bit as potent as its surges of
lust. He looked about the room, eyes falling on the comb left on the dresser.
He got up and went over to it slowly, where he held it up and pulled a few
brown and silver strands from its teeth. The gray in Lupin�s hair was really
quite sexy, when he thought about it. He turned the comb over and over, wishing
the man had left more behind to comfort him. At the same time, part of him
appreciated the fact that Remus�s life was not strewn with useless odds and ends.
He lived a Spartan life, and that somehow made him seem more immediate, more
vital. Well, it did when he was around, at any rate. God, he really
missed Remus. Something in his chest felt like it was about to shrivel up
and die. He felt as though something had been stolen from his soul�something he
urgently needed.

Harry went
back to the armchair and flopped down, shutting his eyes. Oh! That was
nice. With his eyes closed, Harry realized that the chair smelled of Lupin. The
man must sit there often�reading a book, or sipping a cup of tea, or�imagining
Harry, perhaps? Gazing at the wall that, until recently, had separated them,
licking his lips wetly, trailing his hand down his body�? Harry gave a sharp
intake of breath. What had Remus said? Pretend I�m watching you�I�d like to
watch you touch yourself� Keeping his eyes squeezed shut, he pictured Remus
sprawled on the bed, staring at Harry with the same avaricious expression he�d
worn the day he�d made Harry that dessert. The young wizard slid one hand down
his chest, pinching a nipple through his robes. He could clearly imagine
Lupin�s eyes narrowing covetously at that. He moaned quietly, pulling his robes
up over his head and casting them aside. The imaginary Lupin on the bed smirked
just a little, and Harry noticed that his torso was also bare, showing off
those delicious scars and the seductive lines of muscle.

�Oh, Remus,�
he whispered, trailing his fingertips up and down his bare skin. Pushing out of
his trousers, he shifted his hips so that he faced the bed more. �God, I want
you. Want you so bad.� He ghosted his palm over his hardness, watching
fantasy-Remus�s lips part, seeing his chest rise and fall excitedly. �Mmph.
Merlin, you look so good. Love the way you look at me.� He hooked his thumbs in
the waistband of his underwear, and quickly slid them down. He was still
focused on the face of a man who wasn�t�really, after all�present. �Love
your eyes,� he grunted, running a fingertip from the base of his cock to the
tip. �Love your mouth.� Dream-Remus, imaginary-Remus, but
Damn-Well-Good-Enough-For-Now-Remus pursed his lips a little, letting his
tongue dart out once to flick at the corner of his mouth. �Ungh�� Harry
responded while letting his body take control in earnest.

He lifted his legs, bracing his feet on
the arms of the chair, and stroked himself vigorously. In his mind�s eye, he
saw Lupin was suddenly naked, and matching his strokes along his own length.
�Ohhhh�.� Harry was devoutly thankful that Grimmauld Place held almost no one
at the moment, and that Remus�s room was off the beaten track. Hand moving ever
more urgently, Harry�s hips lifted up of their own accord, his body beginning
an undeniable rhythm, heading toward completion. On the bed, imaginary- Remus
had drawn himself to his knees, his hardened cock pointed directly towards
Harry. In Harry�s feverish fantasy, Remus came, throwing his head back, his
mouth falling open, his eyes fluttering shut, and streams of semen dripping
onto the floorboards. �Remus�Merlin�Remus�yes!� Harry cried, pumping his
own release all over Remus�s favorite chair.

Sated, he
curled up in a ball, still feeling pangs of loneliness for his lover, and
wondering how on earth he�d be able to restore the seat before the fireplace to
its previous, unstained state. He really couldn�t ask Hermione if she knew any
spells. He hoped Remus would return soon�Life was much too hard, when you were
that way all the time, as well.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Late that
afternoon, Ron slipped into Harry�s room with a conspiratorial grin. �Hey,
Harry,� he said in a hoarse whisper. �Got you something.� Harry smiled back,
feeling guilty that he hadn�t spent much time with his friend lately. Ron was a
great guy, always there for him, never pushing him into talking about
uncomfortable subjects, and often finding fun ways of taking Harry�s mind off
his problems. Which was definitely a trait Harry could appreciate at the
moment. He watched as Ron ducked his head out the door, making sure no one was
around. �Sorry about that. These would get me into hot water with Hermione if
she knew I was giving them to you. Courtesy of George and Fred.� He rolled his
eyes as if to bemoan his hen-pecked state, but Harry just smiled in response.
Ron might act like Hermione was a big trial, but Harry knew better.

�What�re
these?� he asked, accepting a lavishly wrapped little box. Opening it, he found
what looked like a container of multi-colored pebbles. He looked blankly up at
his friend, who was beaming almost evilly.

�The
twins� latest,� Ron exclaimed. �They�re bloody brilliant. First they turn
Zonko�s on its head, and now they�re going to give Honeydukes a run for its
money. Go on�try one! They�re brilliant!�

Rather
cautiously, Harry popped a small white pebble in his mouth. He was almost
instantly overwhelmed by a strong flood of marshmallow. �Ack!� he gagged,
spitting some out, into his hand. It wasn�t that it tasted bad�it was just that
there was so much of it!

Ron
promptly burst out laughing. �Sorry, Harry, but your face! Succulent Spitters!
Fred and George�s newest gag gift�with a lot of gag, I have to admit.� He
looked slightly contrite when Harry shot him a dirty look. �There actually not
bad, when you get used to them. They�re just really concentrated candies. Here,
have a blueberry one�it�s my favorite flavor.�

Harry shook
his head ruefully. He should have known any gift from Fred and George would be
hazardous to his health. Still, it had tasted pretty good. He stared
down at his fingers, which were dripping with white goo. He absent-mindedly
took the proffered blue candy, and was sure to bite it in half, rather than put
the whole thing in his mouth. His palate was flooded with juice, and he rolled
it around on his tongue contemplatively. The muck on his hands reminded him
vividly of his werewolf, who wasn�t due back until God only knew when. It
struck him that he�d never tasted Remus. Shuddering with unanticipated desire,
he stood up quickly. �I think I�ll take a nap before dinner,� he announced to
Ron. �Thanks for the candy.�

�You want
a nap now?� Ron looked at him dubiously. �But it�s not even five in the
afternoon! Have you been having nightmares again?�

�Er�well, yes
actually,� Harry admitted, glad of the excuse. �But Remus found a crackerjack
cure for them, and I think I�ll have less, now. But I had one last night, at
any rate, so I�m kind of knackered. D�you mind?� He rose and fell on the balls
of his feet, looking at his friend anxiously.

�No�I
guess not.� Ron shrugged unhappily, and headed out to find Hermione. �You will
be at dinner, though, won�t you?�

�Oh, yes,�
Harry assured him. Then he brandished the bag of candies. �So long as I don�t
ruin my appetite!� Ron grinned and waved, shutting the door behind him. Harry
sat at the foot of the bed, heart twisting in new and disagreeable ways. Why
did Remus have to be gone? It wasn�t right. He should be here,
with Harry, where the youth could adore him in comfort. Adore. Did he
really adore Remus? The short and altogether honest answer was �yes.�
Remus was sweet and kind and clever and unimaginably sexy, so of course
Harry adored him. He felt his mind backpedal guiltily; it was the bond, though,
really. He wouldn�t be trying to jump the poor man�s bones at every given
opportunity, and worshiping the ground Remus walked on if not for the bond. He
should probably try to keep that in mind.

Staring at
fingers covered with white dribbles of sugar, Harry avidly licked himself
clean, before flopping down on the bed with his eyes trained on the ceiling. When
was Remus going to come back? He wasn�t sure he was going to be able to
stand pining for the man much longer.

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Harry heard
Remus return just before midnight. He hadn�t been able to sleep, although he�d
dutifully listened to the clock and his heartbeat as a sort of substitute
Occlumency. He had at least managed a light doze, when he slowly became aware
of voices downstairs. Adult voices. Listening, he was sure that one of
the voices was Lupin�s. Excited, he had just tumbled out of bed and was trying
to navigate into his pajama bottoms�which had been surrendered to August�s
roasting humidity�when the bedroom door creaked open, and Remus stepped in.

The
werewolf stood in the doorway for an endless moment, mouth open, eyes riveted
to the boy in the center of the room�who was, except for his ankles, entirely
naked�before Lupin suddenly came to, and had the presence of mind to shut the
door. Harry looked shyly at his feet, sure the man would be angry with him for
almost letting the cat out of the bag, but after a long silence, he worked up
the courage to meet Remus�s eye.

Lupin was
smiling broadly. �Well, that is a pretty sight to come home to, I must
say.� His eyes twinkled with good-natured greed, and Harry laughed with a
sudden breathless affection. Kicking his pajamas back off, he leapt at the man,
who caught him neatly, pulling the youth into an erotic embrace. �And such
a welcome,� Remus breathed, placing almost-too-light kisses across the bridge
of Harry�s nose. He pulled back, looking intently at Harry. �I missed you,
Green Eyes.�

Harry�s
eyes darkened with want at the simple admission, and he pressed his lips to
Lupin�s, tongue asking polite entrance to the other man�s mouth. After a slow,
wet, and much-needed kiss, Harry panted, �Missed you more.� Remus chuckled
softly, the noise reverberating through their bodies, and Harry squeezed his
eyes in heavenly bliss. He pressed his face to the man�s skin, inhaling the
wild, fresh scent of him. �Hurt so bad without you. I worried�I worried that
the bond wasn�t working on you like it was on me. That you�you�d want to leave.
That you�d want to leave me.� he muttered, and felt Remus�s arms tighten round

�I�m so
sorry,� Remus whispered fiercely. �I know it hurt, lover. It hurt me, too.� He
began shifting his weight from foot to foot, rocking them both from side to
side in a gentle rhythm. Nuzzling the youth�s wayward hair, the werewolf was
growling soft, sweet phrases, assuring Harry that he was wanted and loved.
�I�ll never walk away from you. Never. You are my mate. You are mine.
You belong to me. I�ll always come back to you, Green Eyes. Always.�

Harry
smiled brilliantly at him, taking Remus�s breath away. Merlin, doesn�t the
boy realize what an incredible beauty he is? How could anyone one walk away
from that smile? How could anyone resist those eyes? Kissing the youth
tenderly, he set Harry on his feet and gave him an encouraging wink. �Why don�t
you crawl back into bed, and I�ll join you once I�ve washed up.�

Harry sighed, but pulled his pajamas
on and climbed into bed. �I don�t see why,� he called as Remus entered the
bathroom. �You�ll just have to do it again when we�re fied, ed, anyhow.�

Remus felt
the laughter swell up inside him once more, and marveled at it. It had been a
very long time since he had been this happy this often. �Because naturally, no
one could keep their hands off of your nubile body, hmm? You seem awfully sure
of yourself, young Mister Potter,� he teased, scrubbing handsands under the hot
water.

Harry
considered this. �Well, I guess it�s the bond. After all, you probably feel a
lot like however I�m feeling. Therefore, I deduced that you must want to screw
me silly right now. Besides, I have this candy I want you to taste.� He tried
to keep the smile out of his voice, but knew Remus could it it as clear as
anything, especially since a peal of laughter emanated from the bathroom in
response.

�Oh, my
sweet little Green Eyes,� Remus sighed, coming out to lean against the
doorframe. �You are a caution, you know that? An absolute caution.�

Harry gave
him a lopsided smile, feeling a bit uncertain. �A cautihuh?huh? So�is that a
good thing, or a bad thing?�

�On you?
I�d say it�s an excellent thing.� Remus grinned carnivorously, and Harry
scooted back on the bed. The werewolf sat down across from him, eyes blazing as
he raked them over the boy�s bare skin. �Now, why don�t you come over here so I
can ravish you properly?�

Harry
slinked over the covers to straddle the man�s lap, leaning forward to lap his
tongue over Remus�s neck. The man shivered with desire and found a hand in
front of his mouth. Balanced on Harry�s fingertip was what appeared to be a
little white pebble. �What�s this?�

�Try it,�
Harry suggested, his lips twitching. Remus shrugged, leaning forward and taking
the treat into his mouth, along with most of Harry�s index finger. As soon as
the candy came in contact with Remus�s saliva, a torrent of flavored nectar
gushed forth. It was more than Remus could comfortably handle, and quite a bit
of it ended up running down his chin, as well as over Harry�s hand. Harry
sniggered softly.

�You
little devil!� Remus exclaimed when his mouth was less full. �You knew
that was going to happen.� He went to wipe his chin with the back of his hand,
but Harry had already leaned forward to lick kittenishly at the sugary mess.

Harry was
still giggling a little. �Ron got me with one earlier. A present from the
twins.� He trailed his tongue over Remus�s adam�s apple, undressing the man at
the same time. �Brilliant bastards that they are,� he added happily. �I told
you not to wash up. Now I�m going to have to lick you clean again.�

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

An hour
later, the two were lying in bed, sated and drowsy. Harry snuggled close to the
man, who stared down at the sleepy face with a mixture of wonder and sadness.
It was good to see Harry like this. He could not remember such contentment on
the elffaceface�ever. But at the same time, he knew he should not have
been the cause of the emotion written there. It should have been someone
younger, healthier, less world-weary. It should have been someone better. He
cupped the thin face with one of his large paws. �Get back into your underwear,
you little scamp,� he instructed. �God forbid Molly Weasley decide to check on
us for some reason, and find you looking like a debauched cherub, sprawled
naked across my chest.�

Grumbling,
Harry yanked on his underwear, and struggled with his pajamas. As if the
warning had come to life, an inauspicious knock sounded on the door. �Remus,
dear?� Mrs. Weasley�s voice sounded panicked. �Is Harry with you? Hurry,
please! There�s a problem!�

Remus was
not an Auror�the Ministry forbade werewolves from employment there�but that did
not mean he was without excellent instincts. Without a thought, he hoisted
Harry�who squawked at the indignity�up and headed through the door. �What�s
going on?� he demanded.

�Outside,�
Molly gestured frantically, and Remus took the steps two at a time, pausing
only to make certain the stout woman was right behind him. He shooed her out
the front door first, and had barely followed down the front steps when a loud
crack split the night behind him.

Withohesihesitation, Remus threw himself and Harry to the lawn, covering the boy�s body
with his own. He did not need to look behind him to know what had happened. The
street in front of them glowed orange, and a roaring, crackling noise filled
the air. Greasy smoke was pouring out, tumbling into the sky.

There had
been an attack on Grimmauld Place, and explosion and fire were the least of the
Orders problems. Remus shivered in the cooling evening air, despite the inferno
at his back. Harry Potter was now completely without protection from Voldemort
and his Death Eaters.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

clasclass=MsoBodyText>Katte:
I�m glad you�re enjoying it. *Bows deeply, � la Granny Weatherwax* Wow. The
graphic stuff is on AFF. This stuff I thought was pretty mild. Of course, I�m a
terrible judge about that sort of thing, and I have no shame whatsoever.

Leeanna-Marie-Malfoy:
Believe it or not, it has an actual ending planned. Whether I get there is
something else again, but I�ll never leave it hanging! Scout�s honor!

Tsutsuikimihiro:
Thanks! Your name sure is a mouthful!

Phat
Kat: Ah yes. That chapter was specifically written with suffering band camp
sufferers in mind. Tailored to suit!
```
Hakkai - Gojyo - Goku � Sanzo: I look forward to a lot more of the �mirror feeling� as I�m calling it.  I like it when they feel the same, and don�t know it. Of course, I�m completely evil. 
```
HellPhoenixSirius: The dirty stuff�er�the �more intimate stuff� is on AFF (bugger which is down again) and my own site. Only unbeta-read on my site, �cause I�m so lazy. Don�t hate Hermione! She�s very insecure deep down. I was a lot like her as a kid. I wasn�t pretty, so I was smart in self-defense. Plus, she�s a GREAT plot device!Prlrocks: It�s going to get hard on them. I like complications�they make a story last longer. Protective Remus�especially when he can�t help himself and is rather bewildered by his own actions�is too much fun to write. There will be more of him in further chapters.Eric2: I haven�t considered Mpreg or adoption. That�s all farther in the future�but at any rate, what was easy to hide at first is going to become a whole lot more difficult in later chapters�Poicale: A lot of people seem to like Superwolf, and I only threw him in during a moment of whimsy. These guys want to be silly when I�m trying to do angst, but I have a hard time arguing. Superwolf is just too cute. The smut is a lot of fun! If only AFF were up more often! I post it on my site, too, but it�s kind of shoddy. I don�t really know what I�m doing. I�m an artist, dammit, not a computer tech!My favorite Adele Sparks: Forget the thanks, when are you going to write more?! I want to read more stuff from you! Get it in gear! I don�t care if you jot notes about SMURFS, for heaven�s sake, I love your style!�I have a thing for suits of armor. I�d really like one for my house. That and a Jason Isaacs of my own�corinnetkn24 : I keep trying for angst, but Harry and Remus seem to want sweet fluff. I try to give them what they want, at least in small doses.Silver Phire: I was banned for �Offbeat� which is now tarted up and on AFF. Where I can be as smutty as I like. Even if it falls to pieces every time you look at it. I try to write fairly quickly�long ago, I was the update Queen. What did I do with my scepter???�Immortal Memories: Possessive Remus is way cute. Just the way God intended him to be, no doubt. Or the devil. You have to blame SOMEBODY, right?Wandering Beta: I�ve only recently gotten onto the Inkstained Fingers thing, and it really IS pretty good. Which is why I read more than I write, these days. I�ve also applied or whatever at PSA, but their instructions are BAFFLING. I had no idea what I was doing, which is a pity, because their site is out and out great. I would LOVE it if you would beta me; I�m always on the lookout for another beta. Send me your e-mail, and you shall have my next chapter, as soon as my lazy butt gets around to finishing it. Merci!Tinkita: Your name always makes my roommate giggle, which worries me. He has no idea how to be macho. Anyway, I�m glad you�re enjoying yourself; I�m trying very hard, and this whole smut/romance is very new to me. It�s a hard line to walk, but I do my best.Dreamdancer, Dracula5555, charlie-potter1, Kireina1---because he loved him like whoa, for the five minutes that he knew him. Sorry, I just adore Cleolinda. I�m not going to quit here, but I�ve made a pact with a demon (Crowley) that�d I�d put it on my site first, and AFF when it�s available. Which it never is. But I�ll post it everywhere. I�m kind of a post-slut, I guess.Rosethorn2: Er. Guess what I forgot? *Sheepish foot-shuffle* I know it seems a bit rushed. Part of this is because I promised myself two sex scenes per chapter. I have no idea why. Crowley made me do it. Or ShadowPhoenix, since she�s my honorary scapegoat. But really, it�s kind of a writing exercise, trying to get me comfortable with doing smut. Also, I want enough smut that they�re not actually THINKING, because that comes later. Right now, I�m afraid my boys are being led around by their dangly bits. Marshes to Banks: Well, it lacks the gold bars and Jason Isaacs chained to my bed, but other than that; your reviews are quite passable. ; ) This one kind of lacks angst, because the characters WOULD NOT cooperate. But also because for the next few chapters, they just DON�T REALIZE what�s going on. They don�t want to analyze, because they�re enjoying each other. This will come into play later, but for now they�re having a little fun. Not that there won�t be ANY angst�but fun is good, too. More leash in the next couple of chapters. Because I like it, too.StolenDreamer: If you read the AFF version, they should shag around 2x per chapter. Because I wanted them to; I don�t know why. I just think it�s good for both of them, you know? Harry needs the experience, Remus needs the affection�and that�s a good thing. silver-sunn101: ShadowPhoenix helped me out with the Stan bit, and Elizabeth kept Snape in character. I adore Snape, because he�s really so much like me. And the strange interplay between him and Remus in the books is really fascinating, so I can�t help twisting it to my own desires. Plus, it�s so much fun to have someone to hand out the really good put-downs, isn�t it?

Jemma Blackwell: I don�t know if I could be rough on them if I
WANTED to. They seem to have their own ideas. Remus is supposed to be all
guilt-ridden, but the schmuck is actually having FUN with all of this! I just
don�t know how to handle these characters that run away on their own�
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Research and Development Part I; Hunger