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The Dating Game	By : saritat9 Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Draco/Hermione Views: 10161 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, and I make no money out of this. No copyright infrigment intended.

Chapter List
- 4
- 5
- 6
The Dating Game

Chapter 4: This game we play
It felt good to get back to normal after the trials and tribulations of the weekend. Hermione threw herself into her work with vigour. The harder she worked, the less she thought about the mess she had created for herself with Charlie. She had a terrible sense of pending doom.

She wasn't wrong, although doom might've been slight exaggeration. As it was coming closer to eleven thirty, ministry's official lunch hour, there was a knock on her door.

"Come in!" she said, never raising her gaze from the potion formulae she was working on.

The visitor didn't speak, so she deduced it wasn't her assistant Lily after all. She finally turned to look at the door. As she did, she could feel her whole body tighten up and her posture straighten. Great. Just bloody wonderful.

= = =

Draco had to fix this mess, and do it soon. Charles was talking about bloody marriage! He was going to marry Granger! If she said yes. What was he thinking?! Of course she would, Charlie was filthy rich, had a good standing in the wizarding community, he was handsome and obviously -Draco cringed- okay enough in bed. A cunning plan started to form in his head.

What if Hermione's past lover, Weasel, would come back into the picture? All new and improved? What ever she had seen in him, they had known each other for more than a decade. Surely that old flame would be strong enough to challenge the new one created just a few short days ago?

But how to set that up? Weasel knew he resented him just as much as Weasel resented him back. And Weasel had been horrible to Hermione, this surely had to be handled with care. All Weasel had to do was rescue Hermione from Whitmore and then..and then...then Draco would rescue her from the Weasel. A perfect plan.

It went to show Draco's frame of mind that he honestly saw nothing too suspicious or more to the point, wrong, in his plan. He was doing all this, and going through all this trouble, just to save Hermione from herself and the men in her life. Like any true friend.

= = =

"Hello Hermione! I was in the ministry on some business and thought I'd come and see if you were free for lunch."

"That was very nice of you, but I'm behind on work and I really can't- - "

"Come on, Hermione. You're never behind on work, just not as ahead as you'd like." Ron berated her.

"No, I really should- - "

"You're coming with me and that's final!" Ron decided smiling brightly and a bit smugly, and pulled her up from her chair.

"Ronald Weasley, unhand me right now! And do not speak to me like I can't make my own choices! Get out of my office until you learn to behave like a normal person. I suspect I won't be seeing you soon. Goodbye!"

Ron looked disappointed and hurt.

"Fine."

"Good."

"Fine."

"You aren't leaving."

"I'm getting to it. Just one more thing."

Ron backed her into a corner and covered her lips with his.

He tasted familiar. His lips were soft and too wet and his technique was sloppy. How come she never noticed that before? All she knew was that Charlie's stage kisses were better, and they were faked.

Ron was being adamant, though, as he added pressure and swirled his tongue into her mouth.

= = =

That was how Draco found them as he entered her lab without knocking. Weasel had his tongue up in Granger's throat, and Granger just stood there. How could she do this! She was seeing another man yet here she was playing tonsil-quidditch with her ex-boyfriend.

He felt pure rage, towards him and towards her. He coughed.

They didn't even notice him. Weasel was too involved in the kiss and Hermione had finally come to her senses and tried to wriggle out. When Ron didn't let her go, she slapped him with all of her might.

"Oww!!"

"Keep your bloody hands and lips off me. And your tongue, urgh!" Hermione yelled. Then she noticed Draco, and went pale.

"Draco!"

"Malfoy!" Ron went red instead of white, clashing with his famous red hair.

"Hermione. Wea-sel. I came here to ask you out for coffee but perhaps you're otherwise...engaged. I'll show myself out. And Weasley...nice work."

= = =

This wouldn't do. Weasley seemed to kiss like a sloppy schoolboy. And he was the one calling Hermione frigid. Well no wonder! What could he expect, diving in like that. And whatever his wooing words had been, they obviously hadn't worked very well. Draco had seen no passion in Hermione's eyes, just disgust and anger.

He had to help Weasel out in order to save Hermione from Charlie the playboy. Weasel would be too dumb to wonder what was his stake in this. All he needed to tell Weasel was that Charles was bad news. Even he wasn't stupid enough to pass on a good thing twice.

= = =

Draco was waiting outside in front of the ministry when Ron came out, looking crestfallen.

"Weasley! Didn't get the girl?"

"Shove off!" Ron was already walking away.

"Is that how to talk to your only hope? You want to get Granger back, don't you?"

"What's it to you, and why would you help me?"

"Hermione is a dear, dear friend and her current beau isn't working out for her. They're talking about marriage. The clock is ticking, Weasley."

"They're going to get married? Hermione and that gigolo?"

Draco almost could have smiled at Weasel and him for once seeing something eye to eye.

"Looks like it. But you, you need help stealing her away."

"I don't need your help and I don't want it!!"

"Looked into the mirror lately? Don't get me wrong, your usual appearance leaves something to be desired, but what especially adds something to your pasty face is that angry red print of Granger's hand on your cheek."

Draco smirked evilly. He could just see and hear Weasley thinking.

"I'm listening. Just barely, mind you."

"With you, that's close enough."

= = =

The situation was getting out of hand. What the hell was Ron thinking, or wasn't he thinking at all? And what's with his timing? Did Harry put him up to it? Hermione considered this option for awhile. No. As far as Harry knew she was happily dating Charlie. He wouldn't want to screw that up for her. Not after what Ron did the last time.

Now she had to kiss and grope Charlie to prove to Harry and Draco that they were in love and couldn't keep their hands off each other, and at the same time keep Ron at bay...and for how long? Hermione wanted out! Maybe she should just confess. It wasn't worth this.

So, Harry had lied to her and Draco had pitied her and called her only average. Maybe the reason she had reacted so strongly was that she had known Draco was right. Maybe she had hoped and believed he thought better of her. She should've remembered that Draco was nothing if not brutally honest.

Why should she care what Draco sodding Malfoy thought about her appearance anyway? She hadn't very much cared for Ron's opinion, even when they were dating. Ron had wanted her to be more like...Lavender! She had never even considered it.

She cared, alright. And it had stung. She had always cared what that pointy faced blonde arrogant Slytherin git thought, how could she not as he had always been loud and in her face about it, when he was eleven as well as now. She had been a bucktoothed, skinny, frizzy haired mudblood. Now she was not skinny enough frizzy haired mudblood. She wanted Draco to like how she looked, to think she was pretty...even beautiful.

Bloody hell! Where did that thought come from? Did she really? And why?

Oh no!

I think I might be in love with him. I'm in love with that snarky bastard.

How?

When?

How?

What am I going to do? Where am I going to hide? If he finds out I'll never hear the end of it. How could I be so stupid!?"

Stupid stupid stupid.

She had to talk to Charlie! Now! She decided to floo him right away.

= = =

"First thing is your clothes. These have got to go." Draco said poking Ron's tattered brown robes with his wand. "You're a half famous quidditch player now, you finally have more than a knut and a lose button to rub against each other. I suggest black."

"Hermione isn't superficial, she doesn't care what clothes I wear!"

Draco merely raised an eyebrow and went on.

"Buy something from Madame Malkin's. Something refined and expensive. You can afford it."

"Fine. �S that all?"

"Why Weasel, I was just getting started. Your hair. I'm sure Hermione won't mind the colour, she's used to it, but the least you could do for her -and really, for all of us- is to make it look neat. And clean."

Ron was getting pissed off. Good.

"Now that we have covered your clothes and hair, it's time we talk about dialogue. You probably noticed I said �dialogue', not �monologue'. Listen to what she says. Nod at proper intervals. Don't spend all of the little time you have on talking about yourself. You're not that interesting."

Ron gritted his teeth, but staid quiet with great effort. Weasel had obviously learned self control in the past years. Good for him, Draco though.

"Say nice things. Give her compliments. Nothing too extravagant and nothing that requires lying. Compliment her eyes, her new robe. Tell her you like her hair- - "

Ron snorted. He didn't like her hair? Draco thought her hair was rather adorable, even...entertaining.

"You can give her some compliments, can't you? You dated her on and off for years!!" Draco exclaimed impatiently.

"I'll think of something."

"You're just going to wing it? Good luck."

"What?"

"You're going to win over the witch who loves words by improvising? Give me an example. She's right here, what do you say? Now."

"I really like your lipgloss, Hermione. Is that a new flavour?"

Draco stared at Weasley. He had got to be kidding!

"Just shut up. We better start at the beginning. The very beginning. You see a beautiful witch, you want to ask her out, what do you say?"

"But this is Hermione we're talking about." Ron whined.

"So? She's a pretty witch isn't she?"

"She knows when I lie."

"I just told you not to lie at all. Beautiful witch, you want to have a shot, how do you go about it?"
Ron thought for a moment.

"Hello gorgeous. I hope you didn't hurt yourself when you fell from heaven. Your place or mine. Ours?"

Draco buried his head in his hands. This wasn't working. Weasley was THICK. How he had ever gotten himself laid, with anybody, let alone with the smartest witch he knew was an absolute mystery to him. And he had to pair her up with this...trained monkey?

"We'll get back to dialogue later. Let's just see how your appearance improves. And then there's the most important thing; kissing instructions."

"What! I've done plenty of kissing- -"

"And yet you accused her of being frigid? Believe me Weaselbee, what I saw wasn't pretty. How can you expect Hermione to...Hermione to get... aroused, if you just dive right in, tongue first?"

"She never complained."

"No? She dumped you, didn't she? And she's going out with another older, more experienced wizard."

Ron kept his mouth shut tight.

"Place your lips gently on hers. Just a light, tender touch. When she seems willing to continue the kiss, you can add a bit of pressure. Do not go all in like a wizard to a no man's land. Maybe trace her lip with the tip of your tongue or take her bottom lip between yours and suck."

Ron looked at Draco, incredulous.

"When she parts her mouth, slide your tongue in. Slide, not stick. Got it?"

Ron glared.

"Caress her tongue with yours, and let her into your mouth if she's willing."

Ron had had enough of this grooming session.

"Look, if you're such an expert, why don't you kiss her??"

= = =

"What's wrong, Hermione, what happened?"

"Everything. Nothing."

Hermione explained how her "friend" Ron had come over while she was at work, how he had tried to suffocate her with his amorous intensions and how she had had to slap him to just get him away, and then, then Draco had showed up to top the cake. Charlie burst out laughing, and Hermione felt a bit offended.

"And Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy thought you need help getting a date? That's absurd!"

"Ron doesn't count. I don't want him!"

Charlie had a thoughtful expression on his face.

"Who do you want, Hermione?"

Hermione groaned.

"You know, don't you?"

"One guess would come to my mind, yes."

"Oh God is it that obvious? How long have you known? I've only known it less than an hour. I'm going to die. Or if I won't, I'm going to kill myself and make sure that I die."

"That might be bit hasty in my opinion. It's not over until it's over."

"What isn't, my life? I have to join the foreign legion."

Having a muggle mother helped Charlie to understand the reference.

"Hermione, calm down. Just breathe. I'm sure I'm the only one who has guessed or even come to think of that possibility."

"I can never tell him. Promise me you won't tell him either. You have to help me hide this from him! Maybe we could pretend to go away for awhile. You don't really have to come with me, just as long as they don't know it- - "

"For a sensible, smart witch you're having a complete meltdown. Shush! This is what we will do. We will go according to the original plan. We will go to lunch tomorrow, act as if nothing new has happened. Nothing has, right? Right?"

"Right."

"We'll take it one minute at a time. So...should I get a security wizard for my fianc�e in case some other ex boyfriend shows up at work, kissing up a storm?"

Hermione showed him her tongue, but felt a bit better. A bit.
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The Dating Game