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It Wasn't His Fault	By : Sevy14 Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female Views: 3920 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I make no money from this story.

Chapter List
- 1-It Wasn't His Fault
- 2-2
- 3-3
- 4-4
- 5-5
- 6-6
- 7-7
- 8-8
- 9-9
- 10-10
- 11-11
- 12-12
- 13-13
- 14-14
- 15-15
- 16-16
- 4
- 5
- 6
"It's been forty eight hours, how come we haven't heard anything about her condition, this is ridiculous. I want to know what's going on in there."

"Lucius we all do. We must be patient and wait-we will know something when they tell us."

"That is not good enough. I want to know now. It's past the estimated time. We should know something."

"And we will. Let us sit tight a little longer."

"Dumbledore I don't care about waiting. I don't care that they will tell us when they feel like it. I am her father. We are her family. We have been here for two days, I want to know what's going on with my child." My child. I've never been there for her. It wasn't my fault but I was never there. And Andy's only wish was that I protect her and after I'm told she disappears for a week and then is found in my cemetery almost dead. I can't even live up to the wish of her dead mother. That's horrible. Lucius, don't beat yourself up about this. All will be well. Just relax and give her some more time, Tonks is strong. She'll pull through.Yes well, that's all good and well but I want results, news, I want it now. It's killing me to be sitting her and doing nothing. You're not doing nothing. You're doing what every good parent does-they worry until they know something. Breathe, relax, and try to be patient, your agitated state isn't helping matters. Neither is sitting here. I promise you-she'll pull through, she'll be ok. How can you be so sure? How do you know? Because she's your daughter… THAT'S how I know. So relax, it'll be fine. Hmmf.

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

My eyes are closed and all that I can hear is the insistent ticking of a clock. I want to kill it. I think my head is going to split open and my body feels like it's been run over by a truck, specifically a semi-truck, that or Hagrid. Hmmf. Though I doubt that even Hagrid could make me feel this way, he is much too kind. Opening my eyes, the light is unbearable and I have to close them again, tight. Just a little sliver, I'm in the hospital, I'm not dead. Although I think it'd rather be so-that or be in complete silence, blast that bloody clock. I try opening my mouth to call for help, assistance I cannot. My throat is parched, cobwebbed, I cannot communicate it hurts to move the muscles. I hurt. I need water. I need… I-I need my mum. I need her more now than I have ever. A sound, and it isn't the clock, ticking away at my sanity.

"I…" Nothing, I'm not even audible. Louder. I must be louder. "I…" Still nothing. What is that person doing? I know they're in here, opening the windows, no. Too bright. "Ugh no."

"Oh-Oh my hello you're awake. That is very good. Very good. Just let me get the doctor."

And then they were gone, the windows open, it's too bright. "No…" Come back. Shut them. Shut out the light.

"Ah Miss Tonks, you are awake, I am pleased to see that. You had us all quite worried. And how are you feeling?"

"No… Bright…"

"Bright? You-Oh, close the windows and here, the lights are dimmed, better?"

I nod. I can't seem to speak anymore, just open and close my mouth. Yet I'm thirsty, I think I could drink a river. I'm tired and I just want to sleep. Sleep sounds so nice right now. Just close my eyes and rest.

"Miss Tonks we must inform you of what has happened. You went through a terrible ordeal and we have to inform you, stay awake for just a minute longer can you do that?"

Nodding again, that feels like torture, my head is going to explode.

"Good. Now, when you arrived you were in horrible condition, and we had to operate on you for eight and half hours, with both muggle and wizarding techniques. You must be in some pain and I shall fetch you a pain potion as well as a dreamless sleep potion, that way your body can begin to heal itself. I shall make a note to keep the lights dimmed so that your eyes can begin to adjust, being out in the bad weather did not help your condition in some ways but it did stop the blood flow, possibly buying you some time. Ah lovely, your potions are here, I shall wait until the next time you awake to allow your family to come and see you. Now, rest."

I nod and already the potions are taking affect, the veils of dreams are taking over my consciousness and the pain is lessoning. Once again I'm in the dark.

Two more days passed and everyone that had originally come to support Tonks had come and gone and come again, all except Lucius Malfoy. He sat in the same wooden chair, looking at the doors that led to wherever his newly found daughter lay fighting for her life. It had long since passed the forty eight hour mark and the only news that they had received was that she had made it through the first two days and was busy healing. He was miffed that he couldn't go see her, after all, he was her father and they had said that they were allowed to see her after she made it to the safe period but that was not the case. He still sat in a damn wooden chair, staring at the same damn door, waiting for the same damn doctor to give him some news on his child. The grain of the chair and long ceased entertaining him, he'd counted the stone on the floor, and had seen a multitude of people come in and out-yet he had yet to see his daughter. Draco's flowers had a preservation charm put on them so that they'd stayed fresh while they waited to be placed on her bedside table. All in all, Lucius Malfoy had grown tired of waiting and was dangerously close to storming through those damn doors and finding his child, rules, laws, and nonsense aside.

"Lucius any word?"

"No Severus. Not a word. You are back."

"Of course we are back. What made you think we wouldn't come?"

"I assumed you'd get some rest and then return when you received news on her condition."

"Why would we rest in our beds when we could get rest here in these lovely chairs?"

"Sarcasm does not suite you old friend."

"On the contrary it suites me quite well and you know that. You on the other hand have yet to leave. Now-"

"I am not leaving."

"Nobody asked you to. Here is a change of clothes. Narcissa asked me to bring them to you, she requests that you change your attire. She and Draco shall be returning within the hour as will Summa, Remus is bringing her. Albus and I will sit here and wait for news while you change."

"I am-"

"Go. Change."

Begrudgingly, Lucius Malfoy went, with the heavy gazes of Albus Dumbledore and Severus Snape upon his back.

"He's taking this very hard."

"Wouldn't you Albus?"

"Yes, but I knew my daughter, I knew her entire life. He had known about her relation to him for a week."

"He knew much longer."

"Severus, you know what I mean, that he had just found out."

"I know… But when Lucius decides he wants something, he goes in full force. He's deeply committed, I only hope that Nymphadora shares the feeling."

"We cannot be sure she is feeling anything. I hear the new pain potion that they are using here is particularly strong."

"It is a kind, it is better, I'm sure she can't feel a thing until it wears off."

"Yes well you would know. You made it."

"That's right. I did. What are you going to say to her when she wakes up and we can see her?"

"I have not thought about that my boy. Have you decided and I am not entirely sure she shall want to speak to me or Kingsley."

"She will. No matter how she felt before, the anger will have dissipated, she knew that you were only doing what your mother wanted. It was just a lot to digest. Speaking of, where is Kingsley?"

"Working. Trying to figure out how this all happened and why. I'm afraid he'll work himself to death."

"He might. And yes I've thought about what I've said but I am not entirely sure to be honest with you. Is he not returning then?"

"No. He said to notify him when something happens."

"Ah Miss Tonks, good of you to join us in the realm of the waking, we were just taking your vitals. How are you feeling?"

"How do you think I'm feeling?"

"Yes well are you up to taking visitors?"

"Why?"

"You have people in the lobby waiting to see you. It's been about four days now that they've been waiting for you. Would you like to see them?"

"Can I have a mirror please, I must see what I look like."

"Of course, I'll be back in just a minute with some potions for you to take, here you are."

"Thank you." I look like shit. Bloody shit! But at least my face stayed the same-I hope. "Doctor, did I look like this when I came in? I mean like-like my hair and everything was it like this?"

"Yes, yes it was. Is there something wrong then?"

"Oh no… I-I can see people I suppose."

"Very well. I'll go speak with them. It should be a couple at a time, wouldn't want you to over extend yourself."

"It doesn't matter, I'd rather just see who's ever out there- if I don't have to explain things again and again I'll be happy. Once should be enough for me."

"Yes, very well."

"Master Malfoy."

"Doctor. I trust you have some news and are not just… Passing through."

"No… I-She is awake."

"And…"

"Well, she has no qualms with having visitors."

"Very good I shall like to see her then."

"Of course, is this everyone? Your party seems somewhat smaller than before."

"Ah yes well people have lives to continue."

"True, she'd like to see everyone at once and not in spurts. As her doctor it would be best if she did not over exert herself, it could hamper the healing process."

"She is healing well?"

"Quite. She will just tire easy because her body's energy and magic are concentrated on healing itself."

"Yes, I understand. Ah, Draco, Narcissa, she is awake and willing to receive visitors. Doctor, why don't those of us that are here go in and see her and then at a later time, those that wish to see her and come and visit her."

"I-Very well. This way."

The group made up of a Professor, Headmaster, werewolf, brother, father, mother/aunt, and old friend proceeded to follow the doctor. Hanging back slightly Lucius waited until he was even with Severus, "I must admit I'm slightly uneasy with how this shall go."

"Why is that? You are her father. You both just found out and yet you are here waiting for her to get well-even for all of your faults, I'm sure that even Tonks will be able to see the nobility in that."

"I am not going for nobility old friend. It's just that. Me, Narcissa, Draco, how will she take seeing us? We are not her mother. We-we are just relations to her. People without any real meaning."

"Perhaps but you don't know how she feels about you though do you?"

"I-No."

"So don't worry about it then. It will all work out in the end."

"You know, you are starting to sound like your beloved headmaster."

"That may be, but you'll see, I'm right in the end. I always am."

"Of course."

"Miss Tonks, your visitors are here."

"Bring them in, I'm fine." Ok I'm not fine but hey, I'm breathing.

"I'll leave you now. Anything happens, changes I will have to ask you all to leave."

Nodding in consent the seven heads turned their attention to the young women laying in the hospital bed and looked at her.

"Well are you going to say something or are you going to stare at me like I've lost my head?" I can't believe it. He is actually here. The entire family. Lucius Malfoy is here to see me. Probably has to keep up appearances, wouldn't want to get embarrassed or bad press for this. And Summa, poor Summa, she's been crying, Severus looks the same, thank Merlin something's don't change and headmaster Dumbledore, always got that pensive look.

"How are you feeling Nymphadora?"

Bloody hell. I hate that name. "How do you think? I'm alive and kicking headmaster."

"Hmm… Very true my dear. I am glad to see that you shall pull through."

"Yes. I'm sure what would the world do without me. Hmmf. I'm sure it would go on."

"Yes well, I am still relieved and pleased that I am once again able to be blessed with your presence."

"Yes." He must think that I'm still mad at him. I should tell him I'm not. But that would take the fun out of it. "Severus."

"Nymphadora, I brought you a few things to hold you over for a bit while you're in here. Some books to keep you occupied."

"Thank you."

"You are welcome."

The Malfoy's are standing back. Waiting. For what? "Summa, you ok?"

"Ok? How can I be ok? You are in the hospital. You almost died. I almost LOST you. How can I be OKAY? That was a ridiculous question hon."

"Well, I'm glad that you're still you-even if you've been crying."

"Of course I'd be crying. You're my best friend if anything happened to you I'd be devastated."

"Yes well I shall soon be out of here ruining your life at every turn."

"And I shall welcome it. Here."

"What is it?"

"You know what it is."

"Our book."

"Yes. I think that you should read what's in it. When you have a chance and you had better write me back."

"Wouldn't dream of doing such a thing."

"Very funny."

"I try."

"Severus, Summa, perhaps we could go, come back another time."

Ahh the old man is smart. Leaving and taking them with him so that we'll be alone. One happy family. Hmmf. "Yes come back anytime. I'll be here. Doing nothing."

"Good bye Nymph." "Tonks."

"Bye." And then there were three… Hmmf. Where did that come from, I know I saw it in a movie somewhere. Hmm what movie was that?

"I brought you flowers."

The youngest speaks up first. "So you did." What am I to say? To expect? "Thank you."

"You're welcome. Can I-is, is here ok?"

"Sure." This is awkward.

"Uh Tonks. I uh, well I don't know what you think-er… What you know-I…"

She obviously doesn't know how to continue, how to address me. That sucks. Why doesn't she just say it, that tactic always works well."What?"

"I-Well we aren't as bad as you think? Really. We aren't evil. I-We aren't cruel or horrid or-or anything like the rumors and papers say. We are a family and we-we aren't anything like that."

"I didn't say you were." Why would she assume that? "Is there some reason why you think that I think you're evil?"

"I-Well-I assumed that you would think that we are I suppose. My knowledge is that auror's don't think very much of us because of past involvements."

"I suppose that's a valid assumption." I'm really not making this easy on her. "So you think I hate you and think that you're evil."

"…"

Lucius has yet to even move, speak. "Well, to clear some things up, I don't think you're evil nor do I hate you. I do think that you were a horrible sister for those things you said about mum. Not to mention how you thought that she would deliberately leave for no reason-or whatever you thought. But I don't hate you or think you're evil."

"Oh…"

I suppose that was a little harsh. "So you can drop that foolish idea."

"…"

Agh this is awkward. Why doesn't he just say something, his silence is terribly irritating. "Yes well as exciting as this little reunion is I-"

"Perhaps you and I could speak, if you're feeling up to it."

And then the snake strikes. "That's fine."

"We shall wait out in the waiting room for you Lucius. Come Draco. I hope you feel better and are up and about soon."

"As do I. Thank you." Should at least be a little polite, no need to be a horrid bitch. "So you wanted to talk."

"Yes. You were particularly harsh with my wife on your feelings."

"So?"

"She is struggling with this turn of events. Dealing with issues from her past, she has been quite upset about all of this."

"Really? I'm sure not more so than I. She'll get over it."

"…"

"I apologize but I don't feel sympathy for her. Life is a harsh, cruel and unforgivable world, she would know that if she stood up for her sister when she needed her most."

"You do not understand the pressure of the time."

"Perhaps not. But I understand that my mother did and she defied those pressures. I guess that she was just different. Of course, maybe it is just her and my cousin Sirius that understood the real picture."

"I can tell that attempting to inform you of what those times were like would be useless."

"Most likely. Why would I listen to excuses that caused my mother so much pain all her life?"

"…"

"As you can see, I have no sympathy for the weakness of those that surrounded my mother. At least my aunt Bella had an excuse, insanity is one trait that the Black sisters did not share."

"You shouldn't be so harsh on Narcissa, she loved your mother very much. Seeing you makes I much harder for her to deal with the separation that she's dealt with since your mother's disappearance."

"Really? I'm sure she can't have that much separation issues to deal with, it's not like she left her family, the only world she knew, everything, really she has no excuse. Fine, be sad, be sorry, but she has no right to be so hurt-she did what she was told like a good little girl and didn't have to flee in order to be safe."

"…"

"It is harsh. But I am not able to get over that one aspect, she shall have to wait until I am able to deal with that before I'm not so "harsh" as you put it.

"…"

"You really had no idea about me?"

"No."

"Not one? No hint? Nothing?"

"No."

"Oh…" And for some reason that saddened me. "So why are you here?"

"You were found beaten and tortured almost to death. Why wouldn't I be here?"

"I don't know, because you don't know me, you only just found out about our direct relation. If this had still happened and I was just your niece you wouldn't be here."

"I-That is most likely true. I am ashamed to admit."

"You are ashamed to admit? Why? That's the way you've been for your entire life, I was just the daughter of a blood traitor before I came and informed you of our relation-what are you suddenly this whole new man?"

"I am ashamed because this whole situation is horrible. But I am not ashamed because I have-I-well you're my daughter."

"Yes. I know. I told you."

"You're my daughter and I want to be here for you. I want to be a part of your life. I want-I want to have the chance to get to know you and be a father I want-I want to be there for you know even though I wasn't able to do so before."

"Well that's nice of you."

"…"

"I don't really know what you want me to say. I-I would like that but I haven't the slightest clue where to begin and this is somewhat daunting and a little scary."

"I-"

"And you're a little scary." That was mean. "I-ok, that was not very nice. I apologize."

"It's-it's alright. Would you like me to stay with you until you rest?"

"You may. If you aren't busy. I'm awfully tired."

"Yes, I know. You look it."

"I'm sure I do. You have yet to ask what I look like. Why?"

"Because, I've learned in my long life of… Adventure's, that is somebody wants to show me something, they'll do so when they're ready. But I must admit that I was about to murder your doctor because of waiting for you to awaken."

"Oh well that's good. I'm not sure when that'll be just to let you know."

"Of course, take your time."

"You may sit if you'd like."

"Thank you. I have-I have brought a letter that your mother wrote me, would you like to hear it, I'm assuming that reading it would be exhausting since your eyes have been under a lot of stress."

"My mother?"

"Yes. She gave it to Dumbledore and he in turn gave it to me. I received it after we spoke."

"Oh. Um, sure."

"Very well. Stop me if it becomes too much."

"Mmhmm."

"Lucius, my love-

I know that this must come as a shock to you, that I would write YOU a letter. But here I am, I cannot even figure why I'm bothering, you have made yourself quite clear what you think of blood traitors like me, but I find that I must write you.

First, I want you to know that this is hard for me because I never wanted to leave you, honestly, but I felt that I had to, for reasons that I will go into later. In case you don't know, I wrote letters to Bella and Cissy. Speaking of the two, I hope that you have looked after them appropriotly. While I appreciated Rod for his undying love for my sister, he wasn't capable of looking out for her safely, you know how she can be. The mixture of crazy and love for destruction and dark magic are hard to control, especially in impulsive Bella. So I pray that you were able to keep her on a short leash, one that kept her relatively safe. As for Cissy, I don't fear for her as much as I do for Bella. I know what kind of man you are or rather were, but then, you always did take care of your own, I only wish that you treated her right when you were stressed and upset that your plans were not going as you wanted. But deep down, I know that I am just being a worry wart, you took care of her, I assure you, I was watching. You know she was always my favorite.

I don't know how to tell you other than just jump into this head first as Bella does, so here it goes: I was pregnant when I left. That's the main reason. I never loved Ted, I hoped that you never believed that, you knew me better than anyone. Well perhaps Kingsley, but you knew me intimately. It is funny that even now, after all these years, I blush at the thought of our intimacy. You, my first, and even though I gave myself to Ted three times, my only. I would be lying if I didn't say that I didn't think of you those three times-I missed your gentle touch all these years. But I digress, I was pregnant. Twins. A boy. Lucius Narcissian Malfoy. He died at birth. Or rather after Ted hit me one too many times after he found out that I was carrying a boy. Looking back now, I wish that I'd never told him it was twins, that I went along with saying it was one, that it was a girl. Speaking of, Lucius' sister, Nymphadora, no doubt that you two have met or at least crossed paths by the time you get this letter. She is my baby, although I don't think I was a very good mother to her. I named her Nymphadora Belladonna Malfoy, although it'll show up as Tonks should anyone go deep into her files, Albus Dumbledore is an amazing man and if it weren't for him I don't know what I would have done. You must thank him for me. My baby, she is amazing, smart, resiliant, and a Slytherin to the core. Yet she was in Hufflepuff, I was upset that she only was placed there because she thought it was cool-you can only imagine argument I had with that girl after I found out. Happened right in Dumbledore's office, she didn't want to be moved to Ravenclaw, she belonged there if not Slytherin, which was out of the choice. But she did well-top of her class all seven years, quidditch captain her last three, prefect, Head Girl, oh and the only Hufflepuff to recieve perfect marks in Potions all seven years. I don't know how she befriended Severus Snape-but she did. Perhaps it is your charm, she definately knows when to pull that out of her sack of tricks. She's an amazing young women, you should be proud that she is your daughter, even if you didn't know for her entire life. You should know, she's special. Very special. But I won't go into that, that is hers to tell and not mine.

Lucius, I love you, still, to this day I love you as sure as the sun rises and sets. I am aware that you are married to my sister, but I don't care. I loved you before Cissy was ever in the picture. I want to apologize for my departure. I know that the main reason was my pregnancy, I didn't want to make my family look like dirt any more so I took the out that would make them appear to be clean of me. That I was just a mess up-one that went bad. It wouldn't be so strange, Sirus went bad, they could blame my departure on him, on his Gryffindor ways. And they did, but it was never his fault, he didn't even know until he was told. I wish I could apologize to him for what he went through, I loved him too, even if he was a sarcastic arse. Another reason, lesser, I didn't, I don't agree with all of that pureblooded nonesense. I'm sorry. I don't. Perhaps I saved us from an unhappy marriage because I would always struggle with your supremist attitude, even if my heart beat for you. I couldn't allow my children to be raised in an environment like that. Looking back now, I'm happy I did leave because Cissy isn't married to a Carrow, I know you knew about that-I couldn't believe daddy wanted to do that to her, just because they were in favor. Disgusting. But you two are good for each other, compatible. I'm sorry that I caused you some embarrassment, a bruised ego, it was never you, it could have never been YOU. Don't think that. I'm sorry that I betrayed you, that I decieved you-I am sorry.

I just wanted to apologize to you for everything I put you through. I wanted to say I'm sorry for not being brave enough to tell you about my baby. I'm sorry for everything. I love you. And I know that I won't see you again, except for in the picture that rests by my bed. It's of you, me, Cissy, and Bella, our sixth year at your families Christmas Ball. We looked so young, so care free, so-you were so handsome that night. I have kept it with me always and I love that you were a part of my life. Thank you. Thank you for making me whole and giving me the most beautiful gift you could ever give and for once Luc, your money couldn't have bought anything better. I'm sure that Narcissa feels the same about Draco. I'm sorry for everything and I love you so much. Please, be nice to my baby girl Luc, she had no idea that she was yours, I even made her change her appearence so that she couldn't be traced back to you. Only me. I do not expect you to give her expensive gifts, I just want you to protect her if she ever needs it. She is without parents, I know that once I am gone, Ted will disown her. He despises her with a passion, because of you and your pureblooded views. So please, protect her if she should ever need it, I ask you only that. What you do other than that, if that, is up to you and her. Just please, do not be mean with her, when she finds out, I am sure that she will be mad and very disgruntled with me. Baby Dora, she hates that nickname, has your temper, it is loud and powerful, she is so much like you it was sometimes scary.

Lucius, I must go. I love you and my breath is fading fast. I wrote the majority of this a long time ago, yet this last part, I write on my dying bed. As the veil is reaching out to me I can only think of you, Cissy, Bella and my little girl. That is unfair to my other children and to Ted, who, for all of his faults, has been relatively good for to me. Just know that I love you with all of my heart. I love Bella. I love Cissy. And I love Nymphadora. Kingsley has been keeping watch over her in your world for many years now, please thank him for me once more. I fear that I have not done so enough and the sickness that has eaten away at my body will not permit me to do so one more time. Lucius, you were my everything and know that no matter what I did to you, how I embarrassed and decieved you, it was for the best. I hope you can see. I won't ask your forgivness for unlike Bella and Cissy, I truly did betray you. I hid from you an heir and heiress. I hid myself from you when I had worked so hard to be the one that was to be yours.

Lucius, I love you. Remember that. I always, loved you.

With all of my heart, my dying breath's, my love for you is enclosed here in this letter. I pray that you can see and feel it. A kiss for you... Just one more time.

Yours from the beginning and yours until my end,

Andromeda Black

PS: Never doubt that I loved you. Never, for you were my everything."

Looking over at the young women that was laying to his right, he saw that she was asleep. So engrossed was he in the letter and this bonding moment that he had failed to see that she had dosed off. Seeing the quill and paper next to the flowers that his son had left he scrolled her a note.

Dear Miss Tonks,

I find that I am at a loss as to how I should address you, I apologize for the formalness of this note, it seemed as though it was the best way to write you. I had not seen that you fell asleep while I was reading the letter, I shall come back another day, perhaps tomorrow and we can try again. Although I would like you to be far more open to Narcissa, I respect that it shall take you time to deal with the emotions surrounding that, perhaps you can sit down and speak with her, get it all out so that you two can have a good relationship. I must admit that I too am not quite sure where to go and how to start this relationship but I suppose we'll find our way.

I am greatly pleased to know that you are well and I was deeply distressed at the news that you were missing and even more so when we found you and brought you here. I leave you now, knowing that you shall be breathing the next time that I come by and it shall be my first time leaving the hospital since your admittance.

Looking forward to speaking with you again,

Lucius Malfoy

PS: Perhaps you could reach out to Draco, he has yet to say anything but I am sure that he is very intrigued about the idea of having a sibling, he always used to ask for a sister or brother. Now I know that he had both. I pray that you're feeling better when you awake. Until I return.

LM

Leaving the note upon the table facing it toward her he gathered his letter, cane, and cape, Lucius Malfoy turned to look at his daughter one last time before exiting, pleased that perhaps he had a chance to be a father-it wasn't too late. He thanked Merlin for that.
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It Wasn't His Fault