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Amore et Amicitia	By : Kimmimaru Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Sirius/James Views: 6685 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters or settings by JK Rowling. I make no profit from this story.

Chapter List
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Chapter Three: Tenebris et anguibus (Darkness and Snakes)

As soon as he stepped into his house Sirius was accosted by his mother, before he could so much as put down his suitcase she was standing over him and holding out her hand. “Any school letters? Reports?” She demanded, he sighed and dug in his pocket. He withdrew a wad of parchment and put it in her hand.

“You know the teachers looked at me funny when I asked for them to give me updates on my progress.” He muttered and watched his mother reading them through with narrowed eyes, he felt a tightness in his chest, he knew he could have done better, he should be top of the class...but he didn’t want to lose James, even if it cost him at home.

His mother looked at him sternly, her grey eyes glittering in a way he had come to associate with punishment. “It says here that you have got yourself rather a lot of detentions...along with this boy Potter...” She spat the name as if it was poisonous and Sirius winced, involuntarily taking a step backwards. Walburga’s fingers tightened on the sheaf of paper and Sirius took a shuddery breath as he lifted his eyes to hers, his eyes were full of terror as she loomed over him, almost growing to impossible heights. In moments like these he always felt so small, it was difficult to know what was worse, the inevitable pain or the waiting? “It says here that your grades are fluctuating, when you are around Potter you are distracted and you don’t work to the best of your ability! This Bloodtraitor filth is corrupting you already! Where is the pride in your heritage? What have you been doing with him?”

“I-I...We’re...friends...I...I’m sorry...I only wanted...I was curious...m-mother...please...” He ended his plea in a whisper softer than a breath, Walburga froze before moving like a striking snake. She snatched Sirius’ arm and dragged him through the hall, he had one brief glimpse of his brother hiding in the kitchen before the stairs met his shins, he winced as he was dragged back to his feet and he stumbled upwards. “Mother...Mother please...Not this again...I’m bigger now...” He tried to wrench his hand free but Walburga Black was on a mission as she pulled him into the bathroom, he struggled as she forced him beneath the showerhead and held him there. “NO! No! Please...I didn’t mean to...I only wanted-Ple-...!” His voice was drowned out as cold water filled his mouth, nose and eyes, he struggled, spitting and kicking, desperation taking over his senses as his mother’s abnormally strong hands held him beneath the stream of water. He choked and coughed violently, as the freezing water numbed his skin and made his struggles weaken he wandered if his friendship with James was even worth it.

Walburga waited for Sirius to go limp before turning off the water, she dropped him to the floor and watched him retching and coughing up the water from his lungs as he struggled to breathe. “You will never see this boy again, do you understand?”

Slowly Sirius nodded, a broken sob escaping him as he closed his eyes and curled up on the tiled floor. He lay there shivering, his clothing soaked and his skin erupting into goose bumps even as bruises from his mothers fingers appeared on his skin. He heard the door open and his mother left him there. He lay still for a long time, his sluggish mind seeing only hazel eyes and a bright sunshine smile. He curled up into a tight ball and sobbed helplessly into his arm as it cushioned his head. “Jamie...”

XXX

The next morning he gazed into his cereal, stirring it slowly as he leaned on his hand. He ignored his father sitting down at the table with his mother, his brother watched him from the corner of his eyes, he could see the bruises on Sirius’ wrist, the scratches down his arms and the long one down his cheek and he wanted to ignore the pity that welled up inside him, he knew his brother had disobeyed and he had deserved his punishment but he still felt guilty.

“Sirius, elbow off the table.” Orion said sharply.

Sirius sat up properly, still gazing at the table. “I’m sorry, Father.” He whispered and hung his head. “May I be excused?”

“You’ve hardly touched your breakfast...”

“Orion...” Walburga put her hand on her husband’s arm and shook her head. “If he has no wish to stay with his family he will stay upstairs and go without food for the rest of the day.”

“Yes mother...” Sirius stood and walked away, glad to be getting away from his family. He went to his room and climbed back into bed, he sniffed and curled up beneath his blankets. He closed his eyes and tried to will himself back to sleep, if he slept the hunger didn’t seem so bad, if he slept he could avoid irritating his mother and father and they would, perhaps, leave him be.

The tapping woke him in the dead of night, he blinked away his sleep and turned to gaze out the window. A large barn Owl was sitting on his window sill, he frowned and pushed the duvet off of him and climbed out of bed. The window was stiff but he managed to open it without too much noise, the Owl hopped inside and sat on his arm as he brought it to his bed and sat down. He tore off the paper from its leg as it shuffled up to sit on his shoulder.

Sirius,

My parents have said it’s alright to come to mine for the last few weeks of summer! I’m writing to you in the dead of night because I haven’t had time to tell you. I really hope you can make it.

James.

Sirius felt the sting of tears as he remembered his mother’s cruel hands, the freezing cold water running over his face and choking him...he shivered and wrapped his arms around his stomach as he felt it cramp with hunger pains. He closed his eyes and began rocking back and forth. “Jamie...James...I’m sorry...I’m so sorry...” He whispered, beginning a soft chant as the owl, once it realised it wouldn’t be getting a reply, took off into the air and soared out of the window.

Sirius had assumed that James would give up once he got no reply...he had been wrong.

Sirius,

My owl came back without your reply, sorry if he flew off before you could attach it...here’s my address, if you can send one of your own owls that’d be great.

Look forward to hearing from you,

James.

It wasn’t just James who would write, he even began receiving letters from Remus and even their tag along, Peter.

Hello, Sirius.

I was wandering if you’ve already completed that essay on the Goblin Wars that Binns set us? If so could you lend me your notes, my mother’s cat tore mine to shreds as soon as I got home, thanks.

Hope you’re having a good summer.

Remus. J. Lupin.

Sirius,

It’s James again, what’s up? I haven’t heard from you for ages. I hope everything’s ok, I’ll assume something’s come up, I’m worried, just drop me a note.

James.

Hi, Sirius,

I was wandering if you’re having a good summer? I’m not, my mum has made me clean the garden with her...I’m bored. I bet you and James are having great fun.

Peter.

Seriously, mate, we’re worried. I heard from Remus that you haven’t replied to any of our letters...are you sure everything’s alright?

Please write back, we’re all worried.

James.

James says that you haven’t replied to any of his letters, we’re getting really worried...you said that you would write to us. Well, perhaps you’re busy. Please write back, we’re your friends and we miss you.

Remus.

They went on and on until one evening when Remus’ owl had delivered the last letter his mother entered his room while he was composing a reply, finally giving in to the loneliness he felt whenever he saw that familiar handwriting.

I’m fine, I’ve just been very busy. I’m sorry for not replying sooner but things get in the way, you know how it is. I miss you and can’t wait to see you at Hogwarts I...

The paper was ripped from his fingers and he spun in his seat to gaze with wide eyes at his mother as she frowned down at what he had written. “What is this, Sirius?” She said in a low and dangerous voice.

“I...I was...writing...T-To my friends.”

“Friends? We have not approved these friends of yours...” Her sharp eyes landed on the pile of letters by his arm, he made to grab them but her talons got there first. She scanned them all quickly before sneering. “You do not need this sentimental rubbish, I have warned you already about this bloodtraitor friend of yours, Sirius. Now I see that a warning is not enough.” She took up all his letters, his quill, his ink and strode from the room, picking up the cage that carried his raven in on her way past.

“Mum!” Sirius followed her, trying to stop her. “Please, I was going to tell them...I was going to explain that we can’t be friends...please, Mother, don’t...don’t take them away from me!”

“They are beneath one of your status, Sirius. I have told you before, you refuse to listen. Perhaps this time I can make you.” She turned into the drawing room where Orion sat reading the paper and drinking heavily, in one hand was a fat cigar that filled the room with smoke. “Walburga, what is going on?”

“Our son has been consorting with Bloodtraitors! And a Potter no less!”

Sirius spun around to watch his father’s face grow ominously dark, he swallowed and stepped back until he hit the wall. “Father, I...They’re in my dorm...I couldn’t not talk to them...I...” He fell silent as his father turned his gaze on him.

“You cannot have such filth as friends, you are from a great line of purebloods, your heritage is as old as Salazar Slytherin’s! Yet you continue to forget this! I will not have a Bloodtraitor for a son!” Walburga threw the letters into the fire, Sirius watched the flames devour them hungrily and slowly sank to his knees. He crawled closer to the fire and watched them burn, his heart hurt as he watched.

“Is this true, boy?”

Sirius turned his head to find himself bathed in the shadow of his father. “Yes, sir.” He whispered softly. “I’m sorry sir.”

“You don’t look very sorry...I will tell you what will...” he began to remove his belt and Sirius flinched away with a soft moan of horror.

“No...”

“You have no say in this, I will beat you until you learn to accept your place in this family! Do you understand me? You will go without supper yet again, perhaps hunger will snap some sense into you.”

When the belt was off he was dragged to his hands and knees, his jeans yanked down to expose his bottom. He bowed his head and shivered. “Please, sir...Please, I-I won’t do it again...I...” SNAP! He screamed. The belt tore the flesh from him, he could feel hot blood running down his thighs and legs, he trembled as there was a snap as the thick leather hit him again.

Sirius lay in bed that night on his front and when the owl came tapping he ignored it. He closed his eyes and stifled a desperate sob into his pillow, he wanted to get out, he wanted to return to Hogwarts where he had been so happy. His fingers clenched in his pillow as he tried to stifle any noises, it wouldn’t do for his parents to hear him crying, he had already received another two lashes around his face for crying. He let his tears fall in silence, the darkness swallowing them whole.
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Amore et Amicitia