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Years of Burden	By : Polypectron Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Snape/Hermione Views: 6695 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and SSHG is not canon. This is a work of fiction. I am not profiting from it. All characters, places, objects and realities belong to J K Rowling and the Potterverse.

Chapter List
- 4
- 5
- 6
Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me, they belong to J K Rowling and if you don't know that they you must be really confused when you read these fanfiction stories. (to be taken in jest) The events happening during the tale are either made up of taken from the book or the movie and may or may not be in chronological order depending on the story's needs.

Polyplectron

CHAPTER FIVE – Like A Good Little Soldier

A cold draft entered through an open window. The cold night air pinched and sent ripples of goose bumps over Snape's pallid skin. Reaching blindly over his head to close the offending aperture his hand collided with something solid. Puzzled, he opened eyes and sat up right in his cot.

Twisting around, he found the stone wall looming over him and no window in sight. After a moments silence his horripilation's still thrummed along his skin. Scanning the dim-lit room, something velutinous caught his eye. Resting on the side table lay a neatly folded woollen sweater. Picking it up hesitantly he found it remarkably soft. Running his fingers over the dark fabric he recognised the blend of chiengora wool.

The corners of his mouth turned and he yanked the sweater over his head. The sweater was large, fit for a much thicker man but as Snape pulled it over his face he found the neck line to be a little stiff. Determined to wear it he forced his arms through the gapping sleeved; feeling them tightening around his limbs. Flexing his biceps in an attempt to loosen the garment, the wool resisted his attempts, lacking the necessary elasticity.

The sweater was warm and smelt of wool dye. Gathering the hem Snape drew it over his stomach. Warmth flooded through skin and up his spine. His body involuntarily shuddered as the heat licked his nerves. Reclining back on the cot he lay motionless for a moment. Closing his eyes he welcomed the empty darkness and felt his body melting into the mattress.

Gradually his protective garment became scalding and started blistering his skin. The softness turned coarse and his skin itched; the snugness he revelled in tightened and constricted his muscles, cutting off the circulation in his arms and chest. Crushing his throat and cutting off his air. He began to choke. Snape desperately pulled at the neckline but numbness overtook his extremities. Unable to open his eyes he yelled out for Poppy to help him but no sound escaped him.

The shrinking attire compressed Snape until his face turned red and his eyes rolled into the back of his head.

"Anapneo!"

The painful constriction on his throat lifted and instinctively air harshly flooded into his lungs. Snape opened his eyes and was welcomed by the familiar surroundings of his private ward; the archaic walls, flimsy curtains and aroma of clinical healing potions. Chest heaving and body shaking he peered down the cot to find Poppy standing with her wand extended towards him in one hand and holding a lantern in the other. The light from the candle illuminated her stricken face and her turquoise night gown with matching bed coat and night cap.

"Thank goodness you are awake. Almost choked to death had I not intervened, be fortunate that I was up early today."

Conjuring a goblet, Poppy filled it with water and levitated it over to Snape who took it in hand; gingering sitting up and taking a small painful sip. The water burned his throat on the way down causing him to splutter.

It was only a nightmare. . . .

"How do you feel?" she enquired.

Snape put the goblet on the side table and ignored her question; his skin was still tingling from the scorch of blazing fibre. Inspecting his arms he found no blisters or evidence of his strangulation.

My chiengora sweater. . . . I have not thought of it in years.

"I can't help you if you won't tell me."

Snape snapped from his thoughts and regarded her coolly, "Nothing worth the mention."

"Suit yourself," said Poppy tersely, "a thank you for saving my life would have been appreciated but I can take a hint."

Poppy pulled her night clothes around her tightly and frowned stubbornly at Snape. He scowled just as darkly back at her, not enjoying her presence after such a personal dream. The sweater had been the only thing his father had ever given to him that wasn't bad memories or ugly genetics. It had originally belonged to his grandfather Milton Snape who was killed in action in 1945 defending his country in World War II.

Snape had found it while perusing through his father's belongings one afternoon. Tobias had discovered him and instead of the verbal abuse he expected to receive his father had surprised him by offering it to him. It was made of the finest chiengora wool from a dark brown Newfoundland called Oran his father had owned in his youth. Pressing his luck Snape had asked Tobias if he could get a pet. A smack in the back of the head was his answer.

He always had the uncanny ability to ruin precious moments. . .

Huffing impatiently, Poppy made her way around the cot to Snape's side and checked his temperature. Warm, but not enough to cause a fuss. Lifting his arm she faintly heard him wince but his face gave nothing away. Snape stared blankly into space.

"I'll be opening the Hospital Wing in half an hour I am expecting a few students to collect morning medications. The Headmaster has insisted that I relieve you. Here-"

A letter was thrust into Snape's hands. It was coarse in texture and he recognised it from the Headmaster's personal stash he kept in his desk. It had a wax seal with Hogwarts insignia imprinted into it. Obviously the Headmaster was becoming increasingly paranoid if he was sealing notes of little importance.

"The Headmaster dropped this in yesterday after your little visit from Miss Granger."

Miss Granger . . . oh bollocks.

His finger that was tracing the outline of the signia stiffened at the mention of the Gryffindor Know-It-All. Images of his attack flashed briefly in his mind and he tried his best to repress his annoyance. No longer did he wish to open the letter. Maybe if he ignored its existence maybe it would disappear.

"So you remember?" cocked Poppy, "You performed quite the number on the poor girls wrist. Red as a beetroot it was. A little essence of dittany cleared that right up but I could offer nothing for the emotional scaring you most likely caused."

"The girl was snooping."

"'The girl was snooping?' Well clearly scaring her half to death was the only rational course of action. No! I promised myself I would not interfere, despite my severe disappointment," controlling her simmering temper, Poppy flicked her wand and refilled Snape's goblet once more and exited through the curtain, pulling it closed behind her.

Snape watched her leave and brought his attention back to the matter at hand. Opening the letter; with no doubt in his mind Albus would be having a conniption for harming his 'precious Gryffindors'. And not just any Gryffindor but the wiseacre companion of his prized pig Potter. If a Hufflepuff had entered his private ward then no one would have been the wiser.

I am drowning in Gryffindor piety.

Carefully he peeled the wax seal off and pulled out a neatly written note.

Severus,

Your presence is required promptly this morning at six thirty in my study. There are a few urgent matters in dire need of discussing. I have taken the liberty of asking the house elves to clean your robes while you were more or less incapacitated.

Please call Winky to bring them and send your response as preparations must be made before your arrival. This congregation is mandatory and should you not attend the consequences will be less to your liking. So I suggest you get out of bed and make yourself presentable.

Regrettably,

Albus Dumbledore

Snape stared dispassionately at the letter. Preparations must be made? Make yourself presentable? What the hell is he planning? Perhaps I should refuse to go – although, Albus always has been very creative when it comes to consequences. Not rivalling the Dark Lords of course for his are malicious and vile but still.

"Winky!"

On cue a drunken house elf appeared with a loud crack. Winky swayed slightly, the top of her rags falling slightly off her shoulder but she seemed too unabashed to fix it.

"Master Snape, you is in need of your robes from Winky?" sniffed the elf

"Yes I require my robes."

Snapping her fingers his robes and teaching attire materialised on the end of the bed, neatly folded and his shoes black as night.

"Anything else for Winky to help Master?" limply saluting to him.

"Inform the Headmaster I will be arriving shortly."

Winky stood confused, "Really?" she hiccupped, "Arriving where?"

Gritting his teeth, Snape pulled back the covers and swung his feet over the ledge of the bed and stood, he teetered slightly but regained his balance.

"To his office you drunken lout"

Frowning, Winky regarded Snape with impudence, "Master should not call Winky a 'drunken lout'. Winky knows why Master Snape is in the Hospital Wing, Master likes his drink just as much as Winky!"

"Get out!" he yelled, throwing the pillow at the elf. Winky vanished before the pillow collided with her.

Quickly getting dressed Snape mentally prepared himself for his meeting with the Headmaster. The memory of his dream still fresh in his mind and the sound of Miss Granger's voice would ring in his ears.

I just wanted to see if you were alright

He walked out of his ward and did not look back.

~O~

Dumbledore thrummed his fingers impatiently along the top of his claw-foot desk, eagerly waiting for word of Snape's decision. The portraits of previous Headmasters slept peacefully around him and he found himself completely alone in his office. An occurrence like this was quite rare indeed.

He recalled yesterday's events. Miss Granger had careened past him barely aware of her surroundings and on impulse he latched on to her mind. In doing so, he saw a fraction of an event that finalised his decision to real in the chains.

Severus pining Miss Granger face first over his cot and twisting her arm

Shock, could not quite describe his reaction but he had enough time to organise his jumbled thoughts while storming in the direction of the Hospital Wing. Making quite the entrance and startling Poppy who was putting away vials of Head Cure.

"Where is Severus?!"

"Headmaster? He is in his cot. Sorry but you cannot speak to him I have been forced to magically induce sleep once again."

Flying through the Hospital Wing, his purple robes rippled viciously behind him, he gestured the curtains open and found Snape twitching softly in his sleep.

"What happened Poppy?"

"Another surge, it was short but strong. Miss Granger received the thick of it I'm afraid, attacked her from behind."

"Why was she here?"

"Silly girl wanted to see how he was! Had me fooled thinking she needed Head Cure. Well she'll be glad she has it now I'll tell you that much."

Dumbledore stopped thrumming and cleared his throat. Severus was acting well out of character lately and he was becoming distracted from his purpose. The Headmasters control over the younger man was slipping and he could not afford to lose him. Not in this crucial moment in time. Once he passes on, Severus will be the only hope of relaying the truth to Harry Potter. Without such knowledge – their cause will fail.

Rising, he made his way over to his pensive and commands it to return to its place of holding. Getting forgetful in his great age, he had left it out after showing memories of Tom's past to Harry. Spoon feeding Harry was the only way to aid him without over stimulating his mind, otherwise Tom will be able to latch on and discover their intent. It was an agonising game of patience.

"Good morning Albus," came a yawn behind him. Dumbledore turned to find Headmaster Aragon smiling softly at him, wiping his face with a weary hand.

"Good morning Walter," Dumbledore returned his smile.

"You are always up so early. Why, when I was almost your age I kept rising later and later until one day I did not wake up! It is life's greatest guarantee."

"Let us not forget," chimed Dumbledore, "in your current state you may rise at your own leisure for your body is no longer a factor."

"Correct but you know as well as I that this state of repose is a fallacy."

"Quite a fallacy"

A crack interrupted them and Winky came in to view. Hands up shielding her face and one leg bent and hovering in the air.

"Master must'n strike Winky!"

"Winky what a pleasant surprise and right on time, I gather Severus is awake"

Winky wobbled and struggled to regain control of her footing, "Yes Master Headmaster Dumbledore, Master Snape tolds Winky to tells you that he will be arriving shortly."

"Good," giving a curt nod to Headmaster Aragon, Dumbledore made his way back behind his desk and sat. "Winky please fetch the others so that we may begin"

"Yes Master Headmaster Dumbledore!" A crack echoed once more and Winky disappeared.

The sun was beginning to rise over the hills and he felt the warmth soothe the flesh above his corpse-like hand.

The curse is progressing. . . . .

~O~

The gargoyle was one of the most grotesque sculptures in the entire castle. It intended to strike fear and authority into the hearts of any student who was unlucky enough to pass through its passage. But for Snape it was about as intimidating as a Plimpy or Niffler. On the contrary if this brute were to come to life, barred him access and tried to consume him Snape would have no second thoughts about destroying the ugly thing into a million little pieces.

"Acid Pop"

Climbing the spiral stair case he calmly readying himself for whatever Dumbledore was prepared to throw at him.

Knock, Knock

Knock, Knock

Knock

Insisting on rhythmic knocking is absurd.

"Come in."

Head held high Snape waited for the door to open completely before he stepped in. But no amount of forethought or meditative conditioning could prepare him for the rage he felt seeing the Headmaster, Professor McGonagall, Professor Flitwick, Professor Slughorn and Professor Sprout sitting patiently in front of him.

I am not amused.

Dumbledore indicated for Snape to sit in the chair in front of his desk. The professors were distributed evenly on either side of the Headmaster, Sprout and McGonagall to his right and Slughorn and Flitwick to his left while he sat an inch or so higher than his cohorts, like some grand lord of the realm. Snape made his way stiffly to his indicated seat and sat ramrod straight; clenching his fists, grinding his teeth and flashing his eyes dangerously at the Headmaster.

"What is the meaning of this?" blurted Snape, unwilling to compromise with the voices in his head pleading for him to remain calm.

"Well Severus in light of recent events I feel it necessary for you to see the ramifications of your actions. As of now your behaviour is under the scrutiny of a private forum compromising of myself and each Head of House-"

"This is absurd Albus you promised me confidence! This does not concern anyone– especially not Horace he is not even a Head of House! I am Head of Slytherin!"

"In your current state, I feel it is unwise to rely on you to fulfil your duties as Head of Slytherin and I am relinquishing the position to Horace who has graciously accepted."

"Are you out of your mind?!"

"Now see here!" interrupted Slughorn, standing from his chair; his bloated belly rippling under his waist coat, "Need I remind you that I was Head of Slytherin before you, in fact you were my predecessor! Not to mention I was your Head of House while you were at school-"

"And you were atrocious."

"How dare you! I am perfectly capable of looking after Slytherin. Can you say the same about yourself? A bleeding drunkard does not constitute a reliable guardian!"

"Enough!" boomed Dumbledore, silencing the bickering snakes. Slughorn sat back in his chair and it groaned under his weight while Snape shot daggers.

"What has gotten into you Severus?" whispered McGonagall, worry clearly filling her, "Albus has informed us of your situation nae your affliction. What on earth gave you the wise idea to consume an entire bottle of Ogden's on a toxic cocktail of Girding and Pepper Up potions, you are a Potions Master for goodness sake."

"Minerva what I partake in my assigned leisure is my own business and I should not have to explain myself to you or anyone for that matter"

"Severus," said Dumbledore sternly, "your actions over the past few days are not the only matters to be discussed today I'm afraid. Regrettably my decision to hold this council is a result of your actions against Miss Granger while under the withdrawals of your affliction."

News to his colleagues, McGonagall turned to Dumbledore.

"Miss Granger?! What did he do Albus? Severus, what have you done to Miss Granger?!"

Dumbledore interrupted Snape before he could retaliate, "Minerva Poppy assures me Miss Granger was properly seen to. The incident in question took place while Severus was in intensive care. Miss Granger took it upon herself to inquire on Severus's health; he suffered a surge and injured her."

"The girl had malicious intent!" snapped Snape angrily, feeling uneasy under the burning flames emitting from McGonagall's eyes. She was ready to pounce on him and rip her lioness claws into his flesh for hurting one of her Gryffindor cubs.

"Her intentions are irrelevant Severus but your actions are not. Had you considered the ramifications of your actions you would not have found yourself in such predicament. Miss Granger is not the only one discomforted by your behaviour. Pomona you have been awfully quite. Would you like to start by enlightening Severus?"

"Certainly Headmaster."

Pomona sat up straight in her chair. She appeared to be the least infuriated of the group. It was very possible that she had no qualms with Snape what-so-ever but was here out of loyalty or peer-pressure. The two actually had a very polite relationship as their professions found them working together side by side often. Whether it was supplying him with ingredients only someone in the inner workings of the British Herbologists syndicate would be able to find or her acquiring difficult brews and taxing elixirs that would require tedious time and energy to create for sick plants and over-zealous weeds.

Folding his arms over his chest he turned his attention to Pomona and waited as politely as he could for her to give her two knuts worth.

"We have a very good working relationship Severus," she began, "despite your – charm – we have always been symbiotic. But since the beginning of term you seemed to have evolved beyond this reciprocity. Two Tuesdays ago I asked for a Herbiotic potion for the Venomous Tentaculars. Word of a weed virus feeding off the magic of Tentaculars you see. The potion itself only takes a few days to brew but I wanted to ask in advance to give you enough time. I had forty infantile Tentaculars before the virus struck, and now I am left with six stunted adolescence."

"Oh dear," bellowed Slughorn, wiping his sweaty face with an embroidered handkerchief, "Six stunted adolescence? Their leaves are virtually useless, what a waste! You should of called on me Pomona I could have fashioned it for you had I known."

McGonagall shot Slughorn a venomous look for his lack of grace and patted Pomona Sprout's hand sympathetically.

"Thank you Pomona- Severus please leave anything you wish to say after everyone has spoken then you may express yourself," tutted Dumbledore to Snape who had opened his mouth and raised his index finger to argue, "Minerva?"

McGonagall released Sprout's hand and tugged her emerald robes in an effort to look respectable. Tilting her head back she looked down her nose at Snape who narrowed his eyes in a silent challenge to bring her worst.

Like Slughorn McGonagall taught Snape while he was attending Hogwarts and knew of his difficulty to socialise or create meaningful relationships with people. It was always as if an invisible wall was blocking him from the rest of the world. Their relationship at Hogwarts was similar to that of sibling rivalry. Being a gambling woman, McGonagall would always engage Snape in bets over house feats of strength, ability, intelligence, Quidditch and of course the House Cup. Although she would never tell him, for she was much too proud, she respected him with every ounce of her being despite his endless assault on her House. But this year he was stretching himself way beyond the lines of respect into disdain.

"Thank you Albus. I had something else planned entirely but at hearing the news about Miss Granger I just have one thing to say."

Snape raised an eyebrow in challenge.

"When will you put this animosity for Gryffindor behind you?"

The eyebrow that sat precariously high slumped down to join its twin.

I beg your pardon?

"Does it not leave you feeling weary? Suffering a surge does not justify why you openly assaulted Miss Granger and the only real reasoning behind it is because she is a Gryffindor. This week you have seized over two hundred house points from Gryffindor. Dropping quills, asking questions, snorting and voicing concern are nonsensical reasons for deducting house points. Thank goodness Albus has agreed to reimburse majority taken. It is our duty as educators to protect, nurture and sustain the children of Hogwarts. How can you expect to lead a good example for Slytherin if you continue to openly make a mockery of Gryffindor? Now wonder house tension is at an all-time high and I won't allow you to besmirch my Gryffindor family regardless of your 'issues'."

Snape found himself locked eye to eye with McGonagall. He admired her passion for her house. It is obviously something that is lacking in Slytherin, as well house comradery and kinship. Fights regularly broke out between the half-bloods and purebloods, wealthy and the middle-class, notions of allegiance to the Dark Lord and Dumbledore always had him between two or more blood thirsty Slytherins itching to withdraw their wands.

The sun was blaring into the room and Dumbledore flicked his wand and pulled the curtains closed, floating candle sparking to life as the room darkened.

"The time is six-fifty and students will be rousing out of bed shortly. Filius if you don't mind"

"I'll be brief," squeaked Flitwick, "I tend to agree with Minerva, Severus. Your animosity is extended to Ravenclaw as well. Many students have come in terribly upset with your behaviour. I have almost run out of cupcakes to cheer them up with. You see I kept a tin full of cupcakes in my desk and I use this funny little charm, and they dance, the students laugh. Oh its marvellous! – b-but maybe your new position as Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher is causing you unnecessary stress. You held the position of Potions Master for so long. . . Perhaps it is for the best that Horace takes over your duties as Head of Slytherin so you may concentrate solely on your new position."

"Do not think ill of me my boy," said Slughorn, "It is for the best-"

Holding up a hand Snape silenced him and released a breath that he had not known he was holding. Trying desperately to hide his raw rage towards his peers he clung tightly to his composure. Allowing his eyes to swell angrily seemed the only thing he could do. He really wanted to blast some things and maybe choke a few owls to death. But more than anything, this made his desire to drink even stronger.

"I think I have heard quite enough testimonies thank you."

The Heads of House scrutinized him with uneasy hesitation. It was common knowledge that Snape was a hot-head when it came to criticism and undoubtedly felt the desire to scream blue bloody murder at all of them for their 'input'. Dumbledore, who seemed pleased with himself, cleared his throat to draw everyone's attention.

"Indeed Severus. Now I have thought about your punishment, for I feel repeat offences such as this should not go unchastised. I have taken the liberty of liberating you of all your intoxicants, mainly your Ogden's Firewhisky, from your quarters,"

Dumbledore waved his wand and several bottles of Ogden's Firewhisky appeared on his desk. The staff looked quite shocked at the Headmasters bold actions. Snape was as pale as snow, his eyes were dark and his mouth pinched into a painful line. He eyed the bottles greedily and felt enraged at not only the fact that Dumbledore had stolen his stash but entered his quarters unbeknownst to him.

"It is not my desire to see you suffer Severus, only to impart knowledge. Knowing that your addiction will be relieved and at the same time working towards bettering your relationship with fellow staff members only serves to better you. These bottles will be donated to the staff to show your appreciation for them."

The bottles disappeared with a pop except for four bottles that gently floated into the hands of the four Head of House's hands. Minerva looked distastefully at her bottle, Pomona and Filius eyed theirs appreciatively while Horace uncorked his to inhale its scent.

"Ah Ogden's Finest, excellent choice Severus"

Snape stood from his chair, robes swirling around him as he shook violently in silent rage pointing his finger at Slughorn he spat angrily at him.

"That is a fifty year old bottle of Firewhisky you just opened you impudent blimp I hope you at least intend to drink it!"

Slughorn's enthusiasm deflated and sealed the bottle.

"Severus your gifts will not go unnoticed. Think of this as networking. This one gesture of good faith has already gained you the confidence of the very people in this room. No longer will you have to suffer in silence when you have your colleagues to lean on."

Snape knew Dumbledore was reading his mind and he made a conscious effort to let out all of his frustrations through the connections.

I have NO FUCKING IDEA what you think you are doing you senile old bastard. You know very well why I drink. I drink to deal with the crippling burdens you allow me to carry on my shoulders day in and day out. And you think it wise to take my only outlet away from me. Have you no shame?

Have I no shame Severus? Came a voice in his head. It is shame that brought you to me in the first place. Do not dare blame me for your current position in life Severus we make our own decisions. You have wallowed in amber fluid long enough and it is time to surface and deal with the tasks at hand!

Dumbledore stood from his seat and coolly addressed Snape.

"For the remainder of the school year you will be nothing less than sober. Should I hear of anymore 'incidents' it will be more than your collection of sombre bottles I will confiscate. Now everyone if you do not mind, the students should be descending into the Great Hall for breakfast and I have heard kippers are in abundance." Licking his lips, Dumbledore indicated for everyone to leave the room.

Single file, the staff stood and walked from the room, nodding politely to Snape in unanimous gratitude as they passed. Snape stayed seated in his seat never loosing eye contact with the Headmaster. It took all self-control for him not to hex the old coot now that everyone was gone. The door to the office shut loudly and the locks were heard clicking into place.

"I thought I made myself explicitly clear that breakfast was to be had Severus. Yet you remain seated."

Snape felt another surge pumping through his veins. In a voice so viciously low he stared curled his lips at Dumbledore.

"Albus, return my firewhisky"

"I beg your pardon?" asked Dumbledore, raising his eyebrow in amusement.

Stomping up to the desk, Snape pulled his wand on Dumbledore and pointed it underneath his chin.

"I said, Return. My. Firewhisky."

Dumbledore sneered down at him, "I am afraid you are in no position to make demands of me Severus"

"Yet you make demands of me? Everyday I spy for you, lie for you and put myself in mortal danger for you and you have the audacity to take away the only commodity I find any solace in. Did it ever crossed your brilliant mind to question why I have been drinking myself into stupor instead of asininely confiscating my belongings?"

"It is irrelevant. . "

"It is not irrelevant. The end is nigh and you had asked an preposterous behest of me. I was drowning my sorrows!"

"How touching Severus, feeling sentimental over my impending demise?"

"Your impending demise? My intoxication was for the ill-fated deformation of my soul that you have thrust upon me!"

"You alone know whether it will harm your soul to help an old man avoid pain and humiliation. I asked this one great favour of you, Severus, because I will not have the Malfoy boy's soul ripped apart on my account. We both know he is destined to kill me!"

"But what of my soul Albus, mine?! Do you think I will walk from such an act smelling like daisies? I will be pushing daisies before I can even so much as utter-"

With the swift grace of a man one sixth his age, Dumbledore snatched Snape's wand from under his chin and out of the man's fingers. Halting Snape in his tirade.

"I have had enough of this insubordination Severus! Have you forgotten your sole purpose in life is to serve me dutifully and to help Harry Potter for the greater good? Yet you continuously do these stupidly selfish things that seem to get you noticed. The entire faculty notices your behaviour Severus, you are no longer a fly on the wall. It is becoming no longer appropriate to keep you here and yet it is imperative I do!" Dumbledore was truly angry now, his lip had curled up and his brow furrowed. "You think you are the only one undertaking calamitous requests? You think you are the only one to suffer? We all suffer Severus. As you can see I am dying. . ."

Dumbledore shoved his decaying hand under Snape's nose who grunted dispassionately at it.

"My hand is getting significantly worse every day and time is running out and when it does you will have a world of responsibility thrust into your hands. How can I leave this world confident in you when I find you rolling around in your own vomit and assaulting students over hospital beds? Do not forget your place or so help me Severus I will haunt you from the grave for the rest of your days and there after! You will never know of peace!"

Snape stared open eyed at Dumbledore, his hands shaking and his mouth gaping. The surge rippled through his body and disappeared in an instant. His body was showing signs of recovery from his abusive bender. He was apprehensive to retaliate, Albus Dumbledore was truly a powerful wizard and only a fool would think to question it. Lowering his head defeated he waited for instruction.

Like a good little soldier. . .

Dumbledore released a sigh and opened the windows back up and the light flooded back into the room. This seemed to bring Snape back who visibly flinch as the brightness hit him.

"It fills me with regret to resort to such barbarities with our time together growing so short Severus but I must be strict with you. We must not fall from the lightened path," Dumbledore handed his wand back to him and Snape took it slowly in hand, "Please embrace this opportunity I have presented to you and utilize the support of the staff. Many of them are members of the Order of the Phoenix and on some level can relate to you. And believe me when I say my last behest of you does not come without my penitence. You must be the one to kill me."

No one can relate to me Albus for I am forever alone. A murderer. A savage. A dead man walking.

"I know Albus."

A sad smile greeted him back softly, "Good. You are a brave man Severus. Now I believe that the match between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff is today and although you do not often concern yourself with matters pertaining to other houses, I must insist you attend."

"Yes Albus"

"Excellent you are dismissed"

Walking stiffly out of the room, a very agitated Severus Snape made his way to his quarters, passing many happy and jittery children in his wake.

Today is not a good day.
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Years of Burden