All That You Leave Behind

If we were putting titles to our chapters, this one would be called "First Time" or "Utter Bastard of A Chapter To Write". As it is, AWOOT!!! AWOOT!!!! The long awaited, full on, actuallydoingIT chapter has arrived!!!! Enjoy.......and we expect you all to let us know if its lived up to all your expectations or not. You know.......REVIEW!!!! Angst will be quite angry if you don't and all further Sev/Harry hot, illicit buttsex will take place off stage! Having said that, a huge thanks to everyone who did review, and......well...we hope you think this chapter was worth the wait.




He was going crazy. He knew it. Harry was sure of it and if by some slight chance he wasn't there yet, he knew he soon would be.


He'd been guilt-stricken when Ginny had nearly caught him and Severus out, but for all his guilt, he also felt an all consuming lust for the other man, which in turn brought on more guilt, not helped by the fact that Harry couldn't seem to wrench his mind off what he and Severus had been about to get up to. It was all exacerbated by the fact that Ginny had been doing most of her work from home lately, Harry was still at a dead end with the St. Mungo's investigation, and Severus' intent gaze made his cock twitch and fill at the most inopportune moments. All of this roiling through Harry at the same time made him feel as if his mind were teetering at the edge of bolting completely at any second.


Just when Harry's overwrought mind had taken to concocting succeedingly more and more outrageously nonsensical scenarios in order to be alone with Severus, Ginny came and told him about the Quidditch division finals the Prophet wanted her to cover.


"Okay," Harry said, not understanding what she was telling him, "it's your job, Gin."


"Right," she answered, "but I'd have to be gone from Friday night until Sunday evening. The matches start early Saturday morning, but I want to be there early for interviews and photos before the start. I'd rather leave Friday evening so I have as much time as possible. Of course, I'd send James to Mum's, even though it's the weekend, so you wouldn't have to worry about him in case you get called to work or something."


Even as his heart was singing at the thought of finally getting some time alone with Severus, the guilt at wanting it was seeping in along with a flare of deep love for her.


"Gin....you don't have to ask my permission to go away for your job," Harry said gently, feeling like a bastard for making her think she did. It brought to mind nasty, sharp echoes of his younger, more selfish days. You still are selfish his conscience snapped, What the hell is this whole thing with Severus if not the epitome of selfishness on your part? You haven't changed a bit and you know it!


She smiled indulgently, kissed his nose and said gently, "Right...well, I'm not really asking permission, Harry. I'm just letting you know."


He felt like a huge idiot then, taking it for granted she was asking permission. "I'm sorry," he mumbled, "that was...."


"Harry," she interrupted softly, her big brown eyes as soft as her voice. "Just say you'll miss me."


Those doe-like eyes held a trace of amusement as well and Harry felt himself come all undone.


"I'll miss you," he said quite truthfully, just before his mouth closed over hers.


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They were the longest two days of Harry's life, those two days before Ginny left for the weekend, and he didn't think even his guilt at wishing her gone would redeem him, not in the face of the wanton lust he felt for Severus.


Finally, however, Friday evening arrived, and Harry stepped through the floo into the Burrow behind Ginny and James to see his wife and son off for the weekend before returning home where Severus would be waiting. Harry tried not to be obvious in his desire to get back to the Shack, as the Weasley's had taken to referring to Harry and Ginny's much more spacious home, but he was finding it difficult to keep his mounting excitement to himself.


At long last he was stepping back through the floo in to his own home, tripping as he always did, and strong arms reached out to catch him before he fell.


He looked up into deep and bottomless black eyes, intending on melding his mouth to his lover's without further hesitation, and the raw longing he saw there made him nearly cry with desire. Severus swept him up more tightly in his arms, holding him closely and plunged his own mouth over Harry's, his tongue swiftly gaining entrance into the welcoming mouth. He let himself melt against the older man, whimpering and breathless as he did, letting himself fall completely into the searing kiss.


Severus broke the kiss and took Harry's hand, and words seemed unneeded and pointless as they both knew what was going to happen.


In Severus' room they undressed one other slowly and reverently, lips and tongues greeting each newly revealed expanse of skin, breathing in the heady scent of the other, intoxicated with the knowledge that there was no rush, no risk. Just them. Alone. Together.


Harry lay back on the bed, eager arms pulling his lover down with him, anxious to feel all that delicious skin against his own. He spread his legs and Severus lay over him, between them, and Harry marvelled at how well they fit together. How right it felt.


Hard cock met hard cock and Harry held back the urge to begin thrusting already, not wanting to lose himself so soon. Severus attacking his neck with hot mouth and tongue whilst pressing his thick and equally hot shaft against Harry's did nothing to quell that urge, but Harry resisted temptation and endured the sweet torture.


Rough, calloused fingers on his nipples, who knew those could be so sensitive!, tugging and pinching them into hard nubs made him groan with pleasure. He quickly returned the favour, loving the feel of Severus' hard points skimming against his palms and the hissing sound of breath being drawn in. Harry leaned up to lap at one, teasing with his tongue, drawing wet circles around it before sucking it in. Severus groaned loudly and ground his leaking prick against Harry's in appreciation, so he happily repeated the action on the twin.


Harry's enjoyment of Severus' pleasure was soon to be suddenly and excruciatingly refocused on his own pleasure however. Severus unexpectedly tore himself from his grip and lunged down, sucking Harry's throbbing cock into his mouth in one fell swoop.


Yelping in surprise Harry finally gave in to the urge to thrust madly, but found himself stopped in that exhilarating endeavor by Severus' firm hands on his hips, holding him down. Probably a good thing, Harry thought raggedly. Left to his own devices, he'd have shoved his cock straight down the other man's throat and spurted til he screamed in relief.


As it was, Harry couldn't hold back crying out as he felt his climax come barreling on, but Severus either didn't care or wasn't listening, although from the increased sensations that wicked mouth wreaked on Harry, he suspected the former. Fingers plunged down into silky black hair, clenching tightly and Harry did scream his release after all.


He lay there, panting harshly, his limbs feeling watery and weak, and tried to make his dry throat work, wanting to know why Severus had made him come already. He didn't want to believe that the man could possibly be thinking that Harry wasn't ready for actual sex yet. He could take three fingers! He wanted to feel Severus' cock inside him, wanted to feel what it was like to be fucked by a man, to be loved that way.


He felt Severus move up the bed, to lie beside him, his arms reaching out to pull Harry close, mouth covering his once again, tongue questing for entrance. Harry returned the kiss, his fingers skittering down Severus' long, hard body to grasp the stiff and leaking cock jutting between them.


"I want this...you...in me, Sev," he told the older man, pulling his mouth away, "I want you to fuck me.....I want to feel your cock in me. I want it so much."


Another hotly passionate kiss was his answer and then he was being eased over onto his stomach. He felt the weight of the other man as he moved over Harry, straddling him. The heat of hot tongue and lips atttacking the back of his neck produced a breathy moan instead of the protest Harry had been about to voice, then a distinct groan of pleasure as long fingers stroked his sensitive skin.


Gradually, with exquisite slowness and deliberation, the mouth and fingers travelled down his back, caressing every plane and muscle as they went, making Harry moan and sigh in bliss.


Strong hands began kneading his bottom, fingers digging into his rounded cheeks, forcing the muscles to relax happily, eliciting another low groan of appreciation from a slowly melting Harry. Gently his mounds were spread, the air cool on his exposed entrance, making it twitch involuntarily. It was soon warmed, however, bathed in wet warmth as that sinful tongue began swirling around it.


The wicked appendage laved his opening, each stroke more firm, creating a riot of sensation that thrummed through Harry's body. "Oh....Sev!" Harry exhaled shakily, "....so.....f-feels so.....g-good!"


Harry then felt a whole new barrage of sensations go tingling through his veins as the lapping muscle that was his lover's tongue transformed to a blunt point and breached his grasping pucker, driving in to nestle wetly inside his channel.


The urge to thrust back, to impale himself as deeply as possible on that sweetly torturous invader overwhelmed Harry. Firm hands gripping his spread buttocks denied him that desired activity, and he had no choice but to submit to the thorough plundering, spewing out a nonsensical stream of babble all the while.


He felt his balls tighten excruciatingly, felt a powerful orgasm building, his body shaking with the force, and he moaned throatily, "C-can't.....Sev......gonna...!" He was denied this as well; his lover's hand letting his cheek go to plunge between his legs and grasp his dribbling cock, staving off the explosion.


Harry had barely regained his senses when the next sensation assaulted him. Two lube-slick fingers slid into his loosened hole, filling and stretching, and an electric thrill coursed through Harry. A third finger soon joined it's companions, filling him even more, brushing against that magical spot inside, making Harry's toes curl, making him cry out his lover's name once again.


The thought that Sev's long awaited cock would be next drove Harry wild with anticipation, and he began to beg the older man, his voice breathless and whining with need. "P-please, Sev........please........your cock.......I want your cock!"


"Far be it for me to deny my Harry what he begs so prettily for," Severus murmured, the low, growly quality of his voice making Harry's cock throb.


The fingers slid out of Harry's hot channel, a long moan of loss escaping him as they did. His cock was released, and Harry looked over his shoulder at the breathtaking sight of Severus caressing his own stiff cock as he lubed it up liberally. "Oh God," Harry groaned, his eyes staring hungrily, "want it....so much.... hurry....please!"


He made to turn over and spread his legs, surprised when Severus stopped him. One firm hand pulled his hips higher while knees spread his legs wider, gentle pressure from the other hand guiding his head and chest down to the mattress. "Wha...?" Harry began, but hands on his cheeks once more exposing his twitching hole and the firm nudge of thick cock lodging against it momentarily silenced him.


Wait, he thought, is this how he means to take me?!


As if sensing his consternation, Severus rubbed his prick over Harry's hole, stroking his fingers over his back in calming sweeps and said reassuringly, "Relax, Harry......just relax...."


Harry gulped in air thinking this is the moment I've been wanting, waiting for and made his body relax. He breathed out and nodded, folding his arms under his head, his teeth grasping his bottom lip nervously.


Slowly Severus began pressing his massive cock into Harry's waiting passage, and Harry fought to remain calm and relaxed. This was definitely not the same as fingers, his mind said at the startling realisation. This was pressure, this was pain, this was burning!


He hissed his breath out between clenched teeth, feeling a sheen of sweat begin to breakout all over, then gasped more air back in, fighting the urge to pull away from the iron rod that was invading his shaking body.


"Relax......relax...." came Severus' soft voice as he continued to push his enormous length up Harry's tight passage. "Push back, Harry," he said, his voice slightly strained, "it will help." The sense of this was lost on Harry, he could barely make out the words, so intently was he focusing on remaining relaxed.


Despite his efforts, however, he couldn't help the clenching of his burning rim as he tried desperately to adjust to the hard and unrelenting staff that was slowly but surely wedging itself inside him. He felt tears begin to sting his eyes, and shut them tightly, a whimper of pain escaping him.


Doubts as to whether or not this could truly ever be enjoyable began to drift through his mind, and he gritted his teeth against them, determined to cast them off. This was made more difficult however, the deeper Severus' cock penetrated. How could you ever have thought you wanted that monster pole inside you?? an indignant voice in his head asked.


Finally he felt Severus' thighs meet the back of his, his heavy balls brushing against Harry's dangling ones. That along with the deep and satisfied groan the man uttered went a long way toward quelling the rebellious thoughts running through Harry's mind. His hole still burned, he felt fuller and more open than he ever had before in his life, and he was still sweating and shaking a bit, but some of the pain dissapated as Severus began stroking his back again, soothing him.


The thick shaft remained still in his passage, but Harry couldn't help clenching around it even though it burned some, his body trying to make itself comfortable around the intruder. Fingers stroked down his back and over his spread cheeks, down the back of his thighs and around to cup his balls warmly, gently manipulating the encased orbs. Harry's focus was diverted away from his aching ass to this welcome respite, and he felt his limp cock twitch with newly awakened interest.


Severus felt Harry's body finally acclimate itself as Harry did, his muscles untensed themselves a bit, and a deep sighing breath ran out of him, prompting the man to ask solicitously, "Alright, Harry?"


Harry nodded his head again, trying not to seize up again at knowing what was coming next. He lifted his head to look back at Severus, and saw the raw lust in those black eyes, the strain of his facial muscles, the rapid rise and fall of his chest as he panted lightly. The sight of his lover's need and desire drove Harry to an equal need and desire to satisfy it, and he gasped out, "Fuck me, Sev......I want it......do it."

The low growl of Severus' acknowledgement shot straight to Harry's cock, making it stand up as Severus began to slide his own cock in within Harry. It still hurt, but not as much, and the loud groan that issued from the man behind him made the pain bearable.


Harry clenched the bedcovers as he was reamed at a steadily increasing pace, gasping breaths wrenched from his body in time with each thrust into his ass, his lover groaning out his pleasure, the hot huffs of his breath heating the skin of Harry's back.


Harry again turned his head to look at the man, thinking this would be so much more pleasurable for him if he could only look into Severus' endless black eyes. He wanted to be able to hold him, cling to him, shower his pale skin with kisses and have his own skin tattoed with returned nips and licks. He wanted the thick wetness of Severus' tongue invading his mouth while his thick prick invaded his body, and he whimpered loudly at the thought.


He didn't like this position much, he thought. Too impersonal. He loved Severus, deeply, he knew that, and he'd thought that this act would be more intimate. He wanted to touch and taste and breathe in the scent of the man. He whimpered again, rising up on his knees and one arm, throwing the other back over himself, desperate for more contact that simply cock to hole.


Several things happened at once then, sensation again assaulting Harry and carrying him away. Severus leaned forward to grasp Harry's hand tightly in his own, his head coming forward to kiss his fingers. The action caused him to thrust deeper, the head of his prick giving a firm stroke to Harry's sweet spot. Harry's eyes shot open wide as a jolt of pure pleasure shot through him, his cock twitching back to glorious life. Severus grasped it with his other hand and began stroking in time to the pounding he was giving Harry's ass and prostate. Harry was completely undone by this riot of different feelings coursing through him; the love he felt for this man making tears sting his eyes again, the deep throb of ecstasy the stiff shaft in his ass and the firm grip on his cock were sending through him, it all overwhelmed him.


"H-Harry....my Harry...." Severus ground out, his thrusts increasing in both strength and speed.


Harry could feel heavy balls slapping against his, pushing them forward to be squeezed pleasantly against the hand that was pumping his prick frantically, a rough thumb rubbing the leaking tip, encouraging the raging orgasm that was about to burst out the end.



"Fuck!!" Severus shouted out as his body tensed. His cock throbbed and jerked inside Harry's clenching passage, pulsing out spurt after spurt of hot liquid, bathing Harry's nub, while Harry's own prick baptised Severus' hand and the bed below them with thick ropes of seed.


Knees weak and body shaking, Harry collapsed into a trembling and teary heap, his breath coming in tortured gasps. He felt Severus slowly and carefully remove his huge, now limp cock from his outraged and burning hole, and lie down behind him.


Severus pulled the trembling body of his young lover close, encasing him protectively in his embrace, lifting a shaky hand to stroke the unruly mass of hair as he kissed the beloved face of his Harry. "Shh....," he soothed, "relax, Harry."


Harry turned in his lover's arms, wincing as a bolt of pain sliced through his abused ass, whimpered once and closed his eyes, exhausted but revelling in the skin on skin contact. "Love you...Sev...," he breathed and was instantly asleep.