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I Understand	By : LMG67 Category: Harry Potter > Slash - Male/Male > Harry/Draco Views: 9627 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Author Notes
- 2-Revelation
- 3-Grief
- 4-Horror
- 5-Thoughts
- 6-Anger
- 7-Training
- 8-Explanation
- 9-Expressions
- 10-Thinking
- 11-Tower
- 12-Pain
- 13-Seperate
- 14-Questions
- 15-Tears
- 16-In their own words
- 17-Tantrum
- 18-Sorrow
- 19-Darkness
- 20-Light
- 21-Passion
- 22-Breath
- 23-Suspicions
- 24-Iggy
- 25-Fear
- 26-Decisions
- 27-Understanding
- 28-Draco
- 29-Harry
- 30-Fallout
- 31-Accidents...
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ANGER

Draco slept the rest of the night and halfway into the next morning. His body felt heavy as he lay
there trying to decide whether or not to fall back asleep or get up for a shower. He finally decided on
a shower after getting a good whiff of himself. Yuck! Eau de Voldemort.

Getting up from his way too comfortable bed, Draco gathered his clean clothes and headed for the
bathroom. Making the water as hot as he could stand it, he scrubbed himself savagely until he was
sure he didn’t have any skin left. As he did, he silently said his mantra:

I am a Malfoy

I will not give in

I am not evil

I will be no one’s slave

I do not want Potter

The last line he had added a few months ago after he made his decision to not take the Dark Mark.
The Golden Boy of Gryffindor wouldn’t leave his thoughts, waking or sleeping. The first time he
had a wet dream about Harry was the night Draco had saved his life. He still didn’t know what had
made him do it but the second he realized that the blast ended skrewt was heading for the Boy Who
Lived he had pulled out his wand and cast Wingardium Leviosa before he even thought about it.
Boy, had that pissed his father off.

Growling, he finished washing. After getting out of the shower, he stood naked before the mirror
checking his body for injuries. Not a bad looking body if I do say so myself, he thought. Wonder
what Potter’s looks like. Damn! Where had that come from?

Snape had managed to heal his broken bones but the bruising was still visible. Especially his eye.
Nice shiner you got there, Malfoy, he thought to himself. After Draco got dressed, he cast a
concealing charm on his remaining injuries and walked out to the Common Room.

Crabbe and Goyle were waiting for him like he knew they would be. Not only were the two his
friends, they were also his bodyguards. If Draco had not left his rooms until dinnertime the two
would have waited for him. He knew this and he never questioned their loyalty. He couldn’t afford
to and neither could they question his; they needed each other to have any chance of surviving what
was coming.

At least Parkinson had enough brains to know not to mess with him today. He couldn’t deal with her
pity. She would already know what had happened, probably got an owl from her father at breakfast.
Pansy was a cold-hearted scheming bitch, but she was his cold-hearted scheming bitch. She was the
only one of the opposite sex that he would allow around him. His door just did not swing that way,
much to her dismay.

She had decided to take the Dark Mark. After all, what choice did she have? Her father would kill
her if she said no. She was looking out for herself, just like a good little Slytherin would. When the
terror and hatred got too much for her to bear she knew that she could come to him for comfort. She
and his mother were the two main reasons Draco was a spy, that and...no he pushed that thought
aside. He didn‘t want to think of that right now. He was determined to stop Voldemort before Pansy
had to give in and certainly before his mother died.

The three friends left the Common Room to go to the Great Hall for lunch. Crabbe and Goyle
exchanged a look but wisely said nothing. They, too, had gotten owls from their mothers that
morning. When they got to the door to the Great Hall, all three boys unconsciously schooled their
faces into their accustomed masks. One cynical and proud, the other two mean and dumb. They
hated playing these parts but play them well they did. Anything less would be tantamount to suicide.
Draco forced himself to eat and act normally.

Looking around the Hall, he glanced at the Gryffindor table. He was surprised to see that Potter was
not there. Stop thinking about Potter for two seconds, he chastised himself, ARGH! Forcing his
eyes away, he looked up to the teachers table. Catching Snape’s attention, Draco raised his left
eyebrow. This was to indicate that their meeting was to be after lunch. The professor looked away,
signaling that he understood. Draco nodded once. A few minutes later, Snape stood and walked from
the hall.

Draco continued to talk and laugh with his fellow Slytherins for another ten minutes before he
himself left for the dungeons. As he walked, he tried to anticipate what Snape would say. Maybe
today they would agree to get his mother out of there. Probably not. His mother was another one of
their sources of information.

How she survived the beatings and the rapes he would never know. What he did know was that his
respect and love for his mother was so great that it literally wanted to burst from him. He kept it in
check somehow, he had no choice.

He remembered his anger the first time he had tried to get his mother to leave the Manor. She had let
Draco know, in no uncertain terms, that she would leave when Voldemort was dead and Lucius was
in Azkaban. Not before. She could endure anything to keep him safe, she had told him. ‘But what
can I endure, Mother?’ he had asked her. ‘What you must,’ she had replied. So Draco did what he
could to help his mother; and when he couldn’t help, he endured for her.

His thoughts were interrupted by his arrival at his Head of House’s private quarters. He knocked
and waited for Snape to let him enter. He did not have long to wait before the door swung open and
Snape bade him to enter.

Snape looked at him wearily. He knew what the boy was going to ask and he knew the anger he was
going to express at the answer. “Good afternoon, Mr. Malfoy. Please be seated.”

Draco calmly entered the sitting room, which always held him in awe. It changed every time he was
here. Last time, the walls were enchanted to show a night forest complete with animals running
around the room. The furniture had looked like shrubs but was comfortable, none the less.

Today, Snape’s sitting room was he best that he had seen. The walls and ceiling were enchanted to
look like a starry night. The wall by the fireplace had the planets on it and they were revolving
around the fireplace, it presumably being the sun. The wall opposite the fireplace looked a picture he
had once seen of the moon. The floor continued the illusion with craters and chunks of moon rock.
The furniture, he discovered, was in fact the moon rock.

As he sat down on one of the smaller rocks, Draco said to his professor in a very calm voice, one that
should have warned the other man of his mood, “Good Afternoon, Professor, may I compliment you
on your room. It is, once again, lovely.”

“Yes, well, thank you”, Snape said as he sat down on what Draco assumed was the couch. Getting
right to the point, Draco asked; “Can my Mother leave now?”

Snape glared at the blond, crossing his arms across his chest. He still looked intimidating even sitting
down. “No, she may not. And you know as well as I do that she wouldn’t, even were we to ask her.”

Draco tried to stay calm but it was obvious he was fast losing the thin control he had on his anger.
“She will die if we don’t get her out of there, Professor.”

Staring at Draco, Snape’s face was closed. His eyes were a deep black that showed not only his
anger at the boy but his sympathy for him as well. Deciding now was not the time to pull his
punches, Snape let him have the truth. “Yes, she might. Do not disrespect your mother now, boy. If
she did not stay exactly where she was, who would be there to take the punishment meant for you?
She remains so that you might live. Do not take that choice away from her with your foolish
notions.”

That was it! The last straw! Draco’s anger boiled to the surface and he couldn’t control it any
longer. He jumped up, yelling at Snape, “You think I don’t know why she remains? Did it ever
occur to any of you that what she sacrifices is too much? I am not worth the pain she has to go
through.”

“How dare you!”, Snape snarled. “Do not presume that she does this for you only. You are not the
only one that she protects. She does this because she knows this is the only way she can help. You
are still a child, Draco, you cannot understand.”

“How dare I?” Draco snarled back, his face flushed with anger. “How dare you. You and that
imbecile you take orders from. You sit here safe while people die, good people. We sacrifice
innocent people, friends, and family for nothing. It has to stop! My mother will not die because you
are too scared to take the fight to the level required to stop the killing.” Draco was yelling so fast
that he had not stopped to take a breath. When he did, a soft cough drew his and Snape’s attention to
the figure standing in the doorway.

Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts, and one of the most powerful wizards of this era, was
standing in the doorway with a disapproving look on his face watching the scene unfold. It was as
Snape had told him earlier, Draco was not going to accept their decision, not without more
information. It was time he knew more, even though Severus disagreed.

Eyeing the boy with just a hint of anger, Dumbledore walked into the room. “Mr. Malfoy”, he
snapped, “this tantrum will get you nowhere.” He sighed as he sat down, motioning the other two to
sit as well. “Even if we could get your mother out of there, she would refuse to come. You know
this, so please, let us not discuss this anymore,” he said softly, trying to calm down the angry young
man. “I have distressing news. There was another raid last night. The Neimitzes are gone.”

“What?!” Snape yelled. “But they are pureblood. Why would he kill them?”

Draco said nothing, he was in shock. Some else had died, someone he could now never save. He
added their names to his list. Turning his attention back to the conversation, he listened with all his
might. There had to be something that they could do to stop Voldemort.

“We did not know the answer to that question until just now. I got an owl from your mother, Draco.
The Neimitzes were killed because their two year old daughter was overheard, by Lucius, saying
Voldemort’s name.”

“But...but that is insane”, Snape sputtered.

“I agree. But that is what she said she overheard him tell Lucius,” Dumbledore said.

“Lydia...” Draco murmured. Lydia Neimitz was a 6th year Slytherin. “Does she know?” Draco
asked Dumbledore.

“Yes she does. I just came from there. She will be staying here until family comes from America to
take her back home with them. I would appreciate it if you and the others would help her,”
Dumbledore said. He knew that having something to do would calm Draco down faster than
anything. He also knew that Draco and the others would keep that poor girl from breaking down
completely. It was a skill which Draco possessed that had surprised everyone.

“Of course,” Draco said and, excusing himself, got up to leave. As he reached the door,
Dumbledore’s voice stopped him. “She also wrote to tell you ‘thank you‘.”

Without looking back, Draco continued on his way to the common room. The glow of warmth that
flooded him at Dumbledore’s words helped to calm him the rest of the way. It felt good to have
something to do. It took his mind off his anger and focused it where he needed it to be, on Lydia. On
saving someone. He hurried away to gather his friends; they had a lot to do this weekend.

It was quiet in the room for a few minutes before Albus spoke again. “I agree with Mr. Malfoy,
lovely room. You have outdone yourself this time. It is time to bring the two together, Severus.”

Snape glared at the old man, but he was glad to see the twinkle back in his eye. He sighed. “I do not
agree. They all need more time. But it looks like that is something we do not have. What do you
suggest we do?”

Dumbledore and Snape sat a few hours more, making plans to bring the two groups together. Plans
they hoped they had time to use.

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Enjoy!

LMG
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I Understand