Diary of a Death Eater

Disclaimer: Not mine I just play with them sometimes...I promise to share.
Warning: This will end up slash...don't say I didn't warn you.


A/N---Ok, folks. From here on out I'm making it up as I go so...if you have any ideas, comments, suggestions, or requests please let me know.

Thanks to everyone who reviewed I really love your comments.



Dear Diary,


I have either done a terrible thing and will end up paying with my life, or I have done the one thing that will save my family and my life forever.

I have contacted Harry Potter.

I still don’t know what I’m going to tell him. I can’t very well tell him the truth.

Maybe just enough of the truth to sound believable.

I absolutely can not tell him about my feelings for him. I’m not sure myself what those feelings are. I care for the boy…no wait young man…but I also feel a strong attraction to him. He is just a 15 year old boy. Sure he is wiser and stronger than most his age but that doesn’t change the fact that his is 15. I am not a pedophile. Then why do I want nothing more than to make him mine forever…heart, body and soul.


Dear Diary,


I have received a reply from Harry. I am to meet him in a private room at the Leaky Cauldron later today.

I don’t believe I’ve ever been this nervous before. I can feel the butterflies in my stomach. My palms are sweaty and my heart is racing.

I’ve decided to bring Draco along. He will wait outside the room until I know that it is safe to bring him in. I do not want to go alone and Draco has an equal stake in these matters.

I will continue this after the meeting….




Dear Diary,

I’ve just returned. I don’t believe what just happened. To say I’m in shock is putting it mildly.

Draco and I arrived ten minutes early and I secreted Draco into a dark corner to await my command to enter the room. I entered the room slowly; I did not know what or whom to expect.

Upon entering the room I was met by a man I have never met before, or at least never seen before. I quickly did a visual check of the room and noticed it was nearly completely dark.

I also had the feeling that we were not alone in the room. I could distinctly feel like I was being watched.

The man was tall, nearly as tall as I am, with shoulder length black hair. His eyes were a deep blue, one could almost get lost in them forever. He was well dressed and moved gracefully. His other features were all common, too common. I quickly deduced that this man was using a glamour. At first I believed it to be Harry, but I quickly rejected that opinion. The voice was not right.

We exchanged polite hello’s and then he quickly got down to business. I was offered tea and immediately knew what their plan was. Veritaserum. I knew that there would be no way out of this. I accepted the tea and sealed my fate. I knew that they would only trust me after hearing the truthful answers to their questions, and I was asked a fair few questions.

I will simply list their questions and my answers as that seems to be the best way to go about this.


-What is your name?

Lucius Abraxas Malfoy

- Are you a Death Eater?

Yes, but not a faithful one.

- When did you decide to betray Voldemort?

Since before Harry Potter defeated him as a baby.

-What changed your mind?

I did not agree with his views any longer, and quite frankly I was perturbed by the torturing and killing of Muggles. I do not condone those acts and I refuse to be a part of them. I refused to accompany Death Eaters on the raids and when forced to I attempted to rescue those I could.

“Have you plotted, in any way, to kill Harry Potter?

No, I’ve spent the last five years trying to protect the boy.

“And Tom Riddle’s diary?

I was told the diary would not harm anyone. I did not get it through any Dark contacts. I did not know it was Lord Voldemort’s. I just thought it would cause a little mischief. I wanted Harry kept on his toe. I didn’t want him to let his guard down.

“What else have you done to protect Harry?

I have tried to keep my eyes on him. I make sure he was in my box during the Quidditch World Cup, I warned Arthur Weasley of the Death Eater raid, I sent Draco to find him during the raid, I made sure he was warned of the Dragons, I told Severus to keep gillyweed on hand and mentioned it to Minerva in my old house-elf’s presence, I make sure Draco kept and eye on him at school, I made sure the prophesy was shattered before the Dark Lord heard it, I saved Harry and Sirius Black’s lives in the Department of Mysteries, and I KILLED Bellatrix knowing it would place a very large target on my head.

“Why do you protect Harry?

He’s the only hope our world has. I know he is the only one that can defeat the Dark Lord. He will save us all, and…

-And?

And because I am in love with him.

“WHAT! How in bloody hell are you in love with him?

I have watched him for afar for all these years. He has grown and matured well. He is strong, confident, brave, cunning, intelligent, and wise beyond his years. He is also scared, unsure, he feels unloved and used, and he hides all his insecurities behind a mask. (A lot like me.) He has far more to fear than anyone yet he manages to put on a brave face for the world. I am truly proud of him and I am incredibly scared of him. He feels alone in the world even among his friends and family. He feels so much love, honor and duty for the world he keeps none for himself. I would give him that love. I would give him my life!


Just then Harry stepped out of the shadows.

“Did you mean that?

Every word.

-And what of Draco?

Draco? Well why don’t you ask him yourself. He is waiting just outside. Should I call for him?

“Yes.”

I stepped outside and brought Draco in. Sirius administered Draco some Veritaserum. Draco sat down and they began to question him.

_What is your name?

Draco Lucius Malfoy

-Are you a Death Eater?

NO WAY IN BLOODY HELL!

-So then why do you act like such a spoiled git?

I must keep up appearances. It wouldn’t look good if the son of a supposed Death Eater was all nice and cheerful, would it? First off the rest of the Slytherins would probably kill me.

-I thought you believed in all that Mudbloods are scum stuff?

No. I believe muggleborns should have better preparation for our world and that full-blooded Witches and Wizards shouldn’t procreate with muggles. If they keep reproducing with non-magic folk magic itself will eventually die out. The same goes for purebloods. We need to mix our blood with the muggleborns for the same reasons.

-So you have been keeping an eye on me at school?

Sure someone has to watch your back, but you keep making it difficult. With that damned invisibility cloak you make it impossible.

_Why were you staring at Hermione during the Yule Ball?

(Getting a little off the subject, aren’t we Harry? Asked Sirius.)
(I just want to ask a few personal questions. Leave me alone._
(Ok. Ok. Ok.)

Because I like her.

-Like in a romantic way?

Of Course! What other way is there?


After this the glamour dropped on the young man to reveal Sirius Black. Harry and Sirius exchanged a glance and ten asked us to leave. They had to think on all that was said.

Draco and I returned to the Manor and here it sit. I wonder if I did the right thing. Harry and Sirius now know all my little secrets, what will happen now? I fear the future. It is all suddenly so unsure. I do not know where to go from here. I suppose I shall wait and see what happens. After all what choice to I have now?







Dear Diary,


I have been contacted by Harry again. It’s been a long agonizing week since I saw him last. With each day that passed found myself growing more and more worried. I wondered if he agonized over his thoughts as much as I have. Probably more so, seeing as I have had years to come to terms with my feelings. I wouldn’t blame him if he hates me more after all of this. After all, I’ve been nothing but a complete bastard to him all these years. He has hated me for so long. Why should that change now? Can it change?

I am to meet him tomorrow. I am to bring Draco with me again. We are to meet at the same place as before. My nerves are acting up already. I shall post another entry upon my return from that meeting. Until then.



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