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Behind Closed Doors	By : AnnaChase Category: Harry Potter > Het - Male/Female > Lucius/Narcissa Views: 5038 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Chapter Six: Forgiving the Unforgiveables
"The devil's agents may be of flesh and blood, may they not?"

-Sir Arthur Conan Doyle: The Hound of the Baskervilles
The death of his father had changed Lucius. His temper grew shorter and the rare moments he could spend with his family, he was often found deep in thought. The war raged on like never before. It demanded all of Lucius’s time and energy. Narcissa was forced to watch by the sideline how he seemed to slip from her fingers. They had been married for over two years now. It sounded like quite some time, but in truth it was nothing.

The Dark Lord fell in the year Draco had turned one. It was a shock to some, but the end of war was no true surprise. The situation beforehand had reached such a state it was bound to escalate eventually. Lucius had brought the news with him when he returned that evening. He had not been involved directly, but Bella had summoned all the Death Eaters to inform them. There had been a prophecy, about a child. A child from the Potters, about the same age as Draco. Nobody understood. Narcissa, too, could hardly believe what she was hearing.

“But I don’t understand,” she said in disbelief, her eyes round with shock. “A child, as small as Draco... How can this be?”

“No one understands, Cissa,” Lucius sank down on the sofa by his wife and put his arms around her. “But he is gone. This changes everything,” he told her.

It felt good to have Lucius hold her like that. She had missed his attentions when he was so utterly consumed by his job as a Death Eater. It made her wonder if his words were true; would things truly change? And where would they go from here?

“Cissa, they will come for me. The Aurors,” he continued when she did not immediately respond. “I carry the Dark Mark.”

She could read fear in his eyes. Her husband was not a lost cause yet. He had regrets, as he had always had. There were only a few number of true believers in this war, and Lucius had never been one of those. He was not a very brave man perhaps, but he was her man. She would stand by him no matter what. She was a dutiful wife, and a good mother that wanted her family to remain complete.

“We will figure something out,” she whispered in the darkness. Her lips found his in a way they had not for a long time. “I love you so much. You’ve given me a son, you’ve given me everything.”

Ever since Draco’s birth they had ceased their intimacies. The job was done; the heir was born. Of course these were the eighties now; the fact that lovemaking could have other, pleasurable purposes too was no longer a well-kept secret. But it remained an unrevealed secret to Narcissa. The few times Lucius had shown her how pleasant it could be for her, did not weigh up to the times it was a chore to be done. He had never pushed things, and she was grateful for that, but the memory was unpleasant enough to bring on her nerves each time sexual contact was even hinted at.

“Narcissa...,” Lucius pulled away from her embrace to watch her more intently. “I know I haven’t been the right husband for you,” he started, but she stopped him with another, gentle kiss.

“There is no blame on you. The stress of the war got to all of us.” She knew it was not really an excuse. Her husband had engaged himself in unspeakable horrors under the Dark Lord’s command. Even if she was ignorant of the exact details, she was well aware of this. A bit of regret or cold feet towards the end would not be enough to make up what Lucius did.

“We must do all we can to protect our family. Draco must be safe, and he needs both his parents.” she continued, sounding more sure of herself than she ever had. “His safety is what matters the most. It is the only thing that matters. His father cannot go to Azkaban, Lucius.”

What could Lucius do, but agree to such true words? He had no intention of going to Azkaban. No one went to Azkaban and came out sane, even if they weren’t subjected to the Dementor’s Kiss.
Lucius plead Pro-Imperius at the Ministry of Magic, just like many of the other Death Eaters. Narcissa testified for her husband, claiming his deeds for the Dark Lord had been performed under the influence of the Imperius curse. She did well, being the good actress that she was. She remained composed and spoke quietly of how terrified they had been of the Dark Lord. How Lucius had been unable to do anything but comply to the Dark Lord’s commands, fearing the safety of their young son. She did this for him, out of sheer love. One of the witches in the jury even cried during her testimony. Perhaps she understood the distress of a young family being caught up in the war. There had been no Imperius curse, of course, but she had spoken few lies. She knew Lucius had feared the Dark Lord and she had seen what his deeds had done to him.

It was not a happy ending. Even if Lucius had been let off the hook, the Aurors were still at large searching for the Death Eaters that had not come to the Ministry voluntarily to plead their case. Bella and Rodolphus had not been captured just yet, but Narcissa knew it was only a matter of time. Especially if they continued to be so careless.

Bella had come over for dinner tonight. It was obvious this put Lucius at unease. His name had only so recently been cleared; if he were to be seen in the presence of a suspected Death Eater, the Ministry might change their minds. It worried Narcissa too, but in the same time she could not do without her sister. She had thought it a good thing to talk things over. She should have thought twice.

“Unlike some people, Rodolphus and I have every reason to believe the Dark Lord is still out there,” Bella started, pointedly glaring at Lucius as Dobby refilled their glasses with red wine.

“Lucius is only trying to do what is the safest for our family,” Narcissa said.

“I can speak for myself, Narcissa,” Lucius intervened. He did not at all look pleased. In fact, he had not looked pleased at all. Even now he was still suffering. There was the need to build up a new life, and in the same time there were old friends and family from his old life getting in the way. Instead of the relief he had hoped to feel after his trial, there was a new rollercoaster of strain attempting to bring him down.

“The Dark Lord is gone,” he continued intently, sipping his wine as if not at all distressed by his sister-in-law. “I believe we have no choice but to build up a new life, rather than dwell on the old one forever.” His eyes squinted at Bella, as if challenging her to doubt his words.

Bella hardly needed the challenge. Any word against her Dark Lord was enough to set her off. Her eyes turned cold. Ice cold. “I have no doubt the Dark Lord is still out there. The question is not if, but when he will return. And when he does, he will know his true followers. You will not escape his wrath, Lucius.”

“Bella, please,” Narcissa said. She could feel the tension rising in the dining hall. Lucius and her sister had never gotten along, but things had never escalated as they seemed about to now. “Let’s not make things difficult,” she pleaded quietly. She already knew she would not be able to choose sides between her husband and her sister.

“I’m not the one that makes things difficult, Cissy. But let me tell you this. Rod and I are planning something. It’s dangerous with all the aurors around, but we feel we have no choice. We would do everything to find the whereabouts of the Dark Lord. And we will, or go down trying.”

“You’re mad,” Lucius commented, seeming flabbergasted. “You would go to Azkaban for this? While you could avoid it by a simple lie?”

“I would do anything for the Dark Lord. People could write a book full of my sins, but cowardice and disloyalty will not be included. And that is the difference between us,” Bella concluded haughtily. She didn’t need to raise her voice; her mere words stung enough.

There was a clatter of cutlery as Lucius stood up suddenly, a rage darkening his features. “Enough. I will not be insulted in my own house. Leave,” he fumed.

“Lucius!” Narcissa gasped. How many more wars would they have to endure even in the Dark Lord’s absence?

“Don’t worry Cissy,” Bella stood up quite calmly. “I don’t need further encouragement. I have no business here. I know where I belong. And I know it isn’t on the same page as your husband.” Her eyes were full of fire now, a quick change from the ice cold attitude she had sported before.
Narcissa followed her sister back into the hallway. “Bella! Bella, just wait,” she stopped her sister at the front door and took hold of her hands. “I’m terribly sorry. Lucius... He hasn’t been himself lately. It’s his father. And the war. It’s everything.”

“I don’t blame you. You can’t help it you’ve married a coward,” Bella snapped impatiently. It was obvious she was on edge, and it was a miracle both she and Lucius were still in one piece. “The only reason I haven’t hexed him right on the spot is because of you. One more word and I would have drawn my wand.”

“I’ll go back, I’ll have him see reason. You can’t quarrel with Lucius, not now,” Narcissa protested quietly.

“Don’t bother. Cisys. This may have been the last time we’ve seen each other.”

Narcissa’s face fell upon these words. She was nothing without Bella. “You can’t really mean that. What is it you’re planning? Bella...” Panic formed inside of her. She was nothing without her sister.

Bella’s hands clutched her shoulders tightly as their eyes locked. Everyone was always quick to notice the difference between the two sisters. Dark and fair. Bold and gentle. Leader and follower. But anyone fortunate enough to know both could see that there were similarities. Narcissa, too, could be strong with determination. But Narcissa could not see that now. She could only feel the tears forming behind her eyes.

“Now, nothing’s sure,” Bella said, her voice gentler now. “Perhaps we’ll get away with it. I have no choice, Cissy. Every part of me screams I must find the Dark Lord. He’s out there somewhere. And he needs me. He needs me more now than you ever have or will. You are so much stronger than you know.” She reached out to wipe away the lone tear that rolled down Narcissa’s cheek.

“I’m not strong,” Narcissa whispered, feeling herself tremble in her attempts to keep herself together.

“Yes, you are. But you must not let Malfoy get to you, do you hear me? I don’t trust him. I never have. If I ever find out he cranked as much as one hair on your head, I will make him wish he turned himself into Azkaban,” Bella hissed in response, her fury flaring up again at the mention of her brother-in-law.

“Lucius is good to me,” Narcissa assured her. “He wants me and Draco to be safe. You needn’t be concerned about that.”

“I’ll decide that for myself. Be extra careful without me,” she pressed on.

It sounded so certain when Bella spoke of herself being gone. Narcissa didn’t dare ask again or even think of what she had planned to get into such danger. It was all she could do to hold in further tears.

“All right,” she finally whispered, letting go of her sister.

She watched Bella disappear into the dark night. She was dressed entirely in black, so that it was soon hard to see her walk towards the gate behind which she could disapparate. At this point, Narcissa had no clue she would not see her sister until over a decade. Nor had she any way of knowing which of Bella’s predictions for the future would come true, carrying with them a darkness worse even than what the war had shown her thus far.
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Behind Closed Doors